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Title: Kit and Kitty - A Story of West Middlesex
Author: Blackmore, R. D. (Richard Doddridge)
Language: English
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    A Story of West Middlesex




    “Si tu Caia, ego Caius.”


    St. Dunstan’s House


    [_All rights reserved_]


_Crown 8vo. 6s. each in handsome uniform cloth binding._


_Volumes marked * can be had in boards, 2s.; cloth, 2s. 6d. each._

  Crown 4to. about 530 pp., with very numerous full-page
    and other Illustrations, cloth extra, gilt edges,
    31_s._ 6_d._, very handsomely bound in vellum, 35_s._,
    an _Edition de Luxe_ of LORNA DOONE. Beautifully
    illustrated Edition. (A choice presentation volume.)

  SPRINGHAVEN: a Tale of the Great War. By R. D.
    BLACKMORE, author of ‘Lorna Doone.’ With 64
    Illustrations by ALFRED PARSONS and F. BARNARD. Square
    demy 8vo. cloth extra, gilt edges, price 12_s._ and
    7_s._ 6_d._

    St. Dunstan’s House, Fetter Lane, Fleet Street, E.C.


    CHAPTER                               PAGE
         I.—UNCLE CORNY                      1
        II.—MY KITTY                         3
       III.—THE TIMBER-BRIDGE                7
        IV.—PEACHES, AND PEACHING           12
         V.—A LITTLE TIFF                   18
        VI.—THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE          22
       VII.—DE GUSTIBUS                     29
      VIII.—BAD COUNSEL                     37
        IX.—A DOG VIOLATE                   42
         X.—AN UPWARD STROKE                50
        XI.—THE FINE ARTS                   55
       XII.—AN EMPTY PILE                   61
      XIII.—MY UNCLE BEGINS                 67
       XIV.—AND ENDS WITH A MORAL           74
        XV.—MORAL SUPPORT                   82
       XVI.—TRUE LOVE                       89
      XVII.—TRUE FATHER                     96
     XVIII.—FALSE MOTHER                   102
       XIX.—DOE DEM. ROE                   109
        XX.—AUNT PARSLOW                   115
       XXI.—A TULIP BLOOM                  122
      XXII.—COLDPEPPER HALL                128
     XXIII.—AT BAY, AND IN THE BAY         135
      XXIV.—HARO!                          141
       XXV.—ON THE SHELF                   149
      XXVI.—A DOWNY COVE                   155
     XXVII.—OFF THE SHELF                  162
    XXVIII.—OUT OF ALL REASON              168
      XXIX.—A FINE TIP                     175
       XXX.—BASKETS                        183
      XXXI.—THE GIANT OF THE HEATH         189
     XXXII.—A DREAM                        199
    XXXIII.—URGENT MEASURES                206
     XXXIV.—TWO TO ONE                     214
      XXXV.—UNDER THE GARDEN WALL          216
     XXXVI.—FROST IN MAY                   229
    XXXVII.—COLD COMFORT                   233
   XXXVIII.—NONE                           241
     XXXIX.—ON TWO CHAIRS                  248
        XL.—JOB’S COMFORT                  256
       XLI.—TRUE COMFORT                   262
      XLII.—BEHIND THE FIDDLE              268
     XLIII.—THE GREAT LADY                 275
      XLIV.—MET AGAIN                      282
       XLV.—ROGUES FALL OUT                288
      XLVI.—TONY TONKS                     296
     XLVII.—TOADSTOOLS                     303
    XLVIII.—THE DUCHESS                    310
      XLIX.—CRAFTY, AND SIMPLE             317
         L.—A POCKETFUL OF MONEY           325
        LI.—NOT IN A HURRY                 332
       LII.—A WANDERING GLEAM              338
      LIII.—A BAD NIGHT                    343
       LIV.—PRINCE’S MANSION               350
        LV.—RELIEF OF MIND                 356
       LVI.—ANOTHER TRACE                  359
      LVII.—A VAIN APPEAL                  366
      LXIX.—A COOL REQUEST                 381
        LX.—ALIVE IN DEATH                 387
       LXI.—ZINKA                          396
      LXII.—HASTE TO THE WEDDING           402
     LXIII.—THERE SAT KITTY                408
      LXIV.—A MENSÂ ET TORO                414
       LXV.—HER OWN WAY                    420
      LXVI.—ONE GOOD WISH                  427




MY name is Christopher Orchardson, of Sunbury in Middlesex; and I have
passed through a bitter trouble, which I will try to describe somehow,
both for my wife’s sake and my own, as well as to set us straight again
in the opinion of our neighbours, which I have always valued highly,
though sometimes unable to show it. It has not been in my power always
to do the thing that was wisest, and whenever this is brought up
against me, I can make no answer, only to beg those who love blame to
look at themselves, which will make their eyes grow kinder, before they
begin to be turned on me.

For five and twenty years of life I went on very happily, being of an
unambitious sort, and knowing neither plague nor pain, through the
strength of my constitution and the easiness of my nature. Most of
my neighbours seemed to live in perpetual lack of something, and if
ever they got it they soon contrived to find something more to hanker
for. There were times when I felt that I must be a fool, or to say the
least a dullard, for slackness of perception, which kept me satisfied
with the life I had to live. But two things may be pleaded well in my
excuse on this account; in the first place, all my time was spent among
creatures of no ambition—trees, and flowers, and horses, and the like,
that have no worry; and what was even to the purpose more, I had no
money to enlarge its love.

For my Uncle Cornelius—better known to all who had dealings with him as
“Corny, the topper”—took care of me, and his main care was to make me
useful, as an orphan should be. My father had been his elder brother,
and had married rashly a lady of birth and education far above his own,
but gifted with little else to help her, unless it were sweetness of
disposition, and warmth of heart, and loveliness. These in a world like
ours are not of much account for wearing; and she had no chance to wear
them out, being taken away quite suddenly. My life was given at the
cost of hers, and my father, after lingering for a few months, took his
departure to look for her.

Old people said that my Uncle Corny had been very fond of my mother,
looking up to her in his youthful days, as a wonder of grace and
goodness. And even now when he spoke about her, as I have known him to
do after a tumbler of grog, his hard grey eyes would glisten softly,
like the vinery glass of an afternoon, when a spring cloud passes over
it. But none the more for that did he ever plant a shilling in my
youthful hand. This proves his due estimate of money as a disadvantage
to the young.

My uncle possessed an ancient garden, which had once belonged to a
monastery; and the times being better than now they are, he was enabled
to work it so that he made fair living out of it. We lived in an
ancient cottage in the fine old village of Sunbury, or rather to the
westward of that village, and higher up the river. Our window looked
upon the Thames, with nothing more than the Shepperton Road, and the
slope of the bank to look over. What with water-works, grand villas,
the railway, and other changes, the place is now so different that a
native may scarcely know it. But all was thoroughly simple, quiet, and
even dull to lazy folk, in the days of which I am speaking.

My parents had managed to leave me so, or had it so managed by a higher
power, that from my very infancy I was thrown upon Uncle Corny. He was
a masterful man indeed, being of a resolute disposition, strong body,
and stout sentiments. There was no mistaking his meaning when he spoke,
and he spoke no more than a man is bound to do, for his own uses. Those
who did not understand his nature said a great deal against him, and he
let them say it to the width of their mouths. For he felt that he was
good inside, and would be none the better for their meddling.

He was now about threescore years of age, and wished himself no
younger, having seen enough of the world to know that to pass through
it once is quite enough. Few things vexed him much, except to find
his things sold below their value; and that far less for the love of
money than from the sense of justice. But when he was wronged—as all
producers, being one to a thousand, must be—he was not the man to make
a to-do, and write to the papers about it. All he did was to drive his
stick into the floor, and look up at the ceiling. For his own part he
was quite ready to be proved in the wrong, whenever he could see it;
and whatever may be said, I can answer for it, there are more men now
than can be counted in a year, who are under Uncle Corny’s mark; while
an hour would be ample for the names of those who would dare to look
over my uncle’s head, when he comes to be judged finally.

All this is too much of a preface for him. His manner was always to
speak for himself, and he must become somebody else, ere ever he would
let his young nephew do it for him.



THE shape of a tree is not decided by the pruner only. When the leader
is stopped, with an eye towards the wind, and the branches clipped to a
nicety of experience and of forethought, and the happy owner has said
to it—“Now I defy you to go amiss this season”—before he is up in the
morning perhaps, his lecture is flown, and his labour lost.

My wise Uncle Corny had said to me, more times than I can
remember—“Kit, you are a good boy, a very good boy, and likely to be
useful in my business by-and-by. But of one thing beware—never say a
word to women. They never know what they want themselves; and they like
to bring a man into the same condition. What wonderful things I have
seen among the women! And the only way out of it is never to get into

In answer to this I never said a word, being unable to contradict,
though doubtful how far he was right. But it made me more shy than I
was already, while at the same time it seemed to fill me with interest
in the matter. But the only woman I had much to do with went a long way
to confirm my Uncle’s words. This was no other than Tabitha Tapscott,
a widow from the West of England, who did all our cleaning and cooking
for us, coming into the house at six o’clock in the summer, and seven
in the winter time. A strange little creature she appeared to me, so
different from us in all her ways, making mountains of things that we
never noticed, and not at all given to silence.

Once or twice my Uncle Corny, after a glass of hot rum and water (which
he usually had on a Saturday night, to restore him after paying wages)
had spoken, in a strange mysterious style, of having “had his time,”
or as he sometimes put it—“paid his footing.” It was not easy to make
out his drift, or the hint at the bottom of it; and if any one tried
to follow him home, sometimes he would fly off into rudeness, or if in
a better vein, convey that he held his tongue for the good of younger
people. Such words used to stir me sadly, because I could get no more
of them.

However, I began to feel more and more, as youth perhaps is sure to do
when it listens to dark experience, as if I should like almost to go
through some of it on my own behalf. Not expecting at all to leave it
as a lesson for those who come after me, but simply desiring to enter
into some knowledge of the thing forbidden. For I knew not as yet that
there is no pleasure rich enough to satisfy the interest of pain.

It was on the first Sunday of September in the year 1860, that I first
left all my peaceful ways, and fell into joy and misery. And strangely
enough, as some may think, it was in the quiet evening service that
the sudden change befell me. That summer had been the wettest ever
known, or at any rate for four and forty years; as the old men said,
who recalled the time when the loaves served out to their fathers and
mothers stuck fast, like clay, upon the churchyard wall. Now the river
was up to the mark of the road, and the meadows on the other side were
lakes, and even a young man was well pleased to feel a flint under
his foot as he walked. For the road was washed with torrents, and all
the hedges reeking, and the solid trunks of ancient elms seemed to be
channelled with perpetual drip.

But the sun began to shine out of the clouds, at his very last
opportunity; and weak and watery though he looked, with a bank of haze
beneath him, a soft relief of hope and comfort filled the flooded
valley. And into our old western porch a pleasant light came quivering,
and showed us who our neighbours were, and made us smile at one

As it happened now, my mind was full of a certain bed of onions, which
had grown so rank and sappy, that we had not dared to harvest them.
And instead of right thoughts upon entering church, I was saying to
myself—“We shall have a dry week, I do believe. I will pull them
to-morrow, and chance it.” This will show that what now befell me came
without any fault of mine.

For just as the last bell struck its stroke, and the ringer swang down
on the heel of it, and the murmur went floating among the trees, I drew
back a little to let the women pass, having sense of their feeling
about their dresses, which is to be respected by every man. And in
those days they wore lovely flounces, like a bee-hive trimmed with
Venetian blinds. They had learned a fine manner of twitching up these,
whenever they came to steps and stairs; and while they were at it, they
always looked round, to make sure of no disarrangement. My respect for
them made me gaze over their heads, as if without knowledge of their
being there at all. Yet they whispered freely to one another, desiring
to know if their ribands were right for the worship of the Almighty.

Now as I gazed in a general style, being timid about looking
especially, there came into my eyes, without any sense of moment, but
stealing unawares as in a vision, the fairest and purest and sweetest
picture that ever went yet from the eyes to the heart. To those who
have never known the like, it is hopeless to try to explain it; and
even to myself I cannot render, by word or by thought, a mere jot of
it. And many would say, that to let things so happen, the wits for the
time must be out of their duty.

It may have been only a glance, or a turn of the head, or the toss of
a love-lock—whatever it was, for me the world was a different place
thereafter. It was a lovely and gentle face, making light in the gloom
of the tower arch, and touched with no thought of its own appearance,
as other pretty faces were. I had never dreamed that any maiden could
have said so much to me, as now came to me without a word.

Wondering only about her, and feeling abashed at my own footsteps, I
followed softly up the church, and scarcely knew the button of our own
pew door. For Uncle Corny owned a pew, and insisted upon having it,
and would allow no one to sit there, without his own grace and written
order. He never found it needful to go to church on his own account,
being a most upright man; but if ever he heard of any other Christian
being shown into his pew, he put on his best clothes the next Sunday
morning, and repaired to the sacred building, with a black-thorn staff
which had a knob of obsidian. Such a thing would now be considered
out of date; but the church was the church, in those more established
times. Here I sat down in my usual manner, to the best of my power,
because I knew how my neighbours would be watching me; and saying my
prayers into the bottom of my hat, I resolved to remember where I was,
and nothing else. But this was much easier said than done; for the
first face I met, upon looking round, was that of Sam Henderson the
racer, the owner of the paddocks at Halliford, a young man who thought
a great deal of himself, and tried to bring others to a like opinion.
He was not altogether a favourite of mine, although I knew nothing
against him; for he loved showy colours, and indulged in large fancies
that all the young women were in love with him. Now he gave me a nod,
although the clergyman was speaking, and following the turn of his eyes
I was vexed yet more with his behaviour. He was gazing, as though with
a lofty approval, and no sort of fear in his bright black eyes, at the
face which had made me feel just now so lowly and so worthless.

In the Manor pew, which had been empty nearly all the summer—for the
weather had driven our ladies abroad—there she sat, and it made me feel
as if hope was almost gone from me. For I could not help knowing that
Mrs. Sheppard, who arranged all the worshippers according to their
rank, would never have shown the young lady in there, unless she had
been of high standing. And almost before I was out of that thought
my wits being quicker than usual, it became quite clear to me, who
she was—or at any rate who was with her. From the corner of the pew
there came and stood before her, as if to take general attention off,
a highly esteemed and very well dressed lady, Mrs. Jenny Marker. This
was the “lady housekeeper,” as everybody was bound to call her who
hoped to get orders, at Coldpepper Hall, herself a very well bred and
most kind-hearted woman, to all who considered her dignity. Having
always done this, I felt sure of her good word, and hoping much too
hastily that the young lady was her niece, I made it feel perhaps less
presumptuous on my part, to try to steal a glance at her, whenever luck

Herein I found tumultuous bliss, until my heart fell heavily. I was
heeding very scantily the reading of the minister, and voices of the
clerk and faithful of the congregation, when suddenly there came the
words,—“the dignity of Princes.” And then I knew, without thinking
twice, that this young lady could never have won the dignity of the
Manor-pew, unless she had been a great deal more than the niece
of Jenny Marker. In a moment, too, my senses came to back up this
perception, and I began to revile myself for thinking such a thought
of her. Not that Mrs. Marker was of any low condition, for she wore
two rings and a gold watch-chain, and was highly respected by every
one; but she cheapened all the goods she bought, even down to an old
red herring, and she had been known to make people take garden-stuff
in exchange for goods, or else forego her custom. The memory of these
things grieved me with my own imagination.

I was very loth to go—as you will see was natural—without so much as
one good look at the sweet face which had blessed me; but everything
seemed to turn against me, and the light grew worse and worse. Moreover
Sam Henderson stared so boldly, having none of my diffidence, that Mrs.
Marker came forward sharply, and jerked the rings of the red baize
curtain, so that he could see only that. At this he turned red, and
pulled up his collar, and I felt within myself a glow of good-will for
the punching of his head. And perhaps he had grounds for some warm
feeling toward me, for the reason that I being more to the left could
still get a glimpse round the corner of the curtain, which acted as a
total drop of scenery for him.

When the sermon was finished in its natural course, the sky was getting
very dark outside, and the young men and women were on best behaviour
to take no advantage of the gloom in going out. For as yet we had no
great gas-works, such as impair in the present generation the romance
and enlargement of an evening service. So that when we came forth, we
were in a frame of mind for thinking the best of one another.



BY this time it had become clear to me, that whatever my thoughts
were and my longings—such as those who are free from them call
romantic—there was nothing proper for me to do, except to turn in at
our own little gate, and be satisfied with my own duty inside. And
this I was truly at the point of doing, although with very little
satisfaction, when the glancing of the twilight down the road convinced
me of a different duty. To the westward there happened just here to
be a long stretch of lane without much turn in it, only guided and
overhung partly with trees, and tufts of wild hops which were barren
this year. And throughout this long course, which was wavering with
gloom, a watery gleam from the west set in, partly perhaps from the
flooded river, and partly from the last glance of sunset.

My hand was just laid upon our wicket-latch, and my mind made up for no
thinking, when the figure of some one in the distance, like a call-back
signal, stopped me. I had not returned, you must understand, by the
shortest possible way from church, which would have taken me to Uncle
Corny’s door opposite the river; but being a little disturbed, perhaps,
and desiring to walk it off quietly, had turned up to the right towards
the Halliford lane, to escape any gossip, and come back through our
garden. And where I stood now, there was a view by daylight of nearly
half a mile of lane, and the timber bridge across the brook.

The lane was not quite straight, but still it bent in such an obliging
manner, first to the left and then back to the right, that anything
happening upon its course would be likely to come into view from our
gate. And I saw as plainly as could be, although beyond shouting
distance, a man with his arms spread forth, as if to stop or catch
anybody going further, and nearer to me the forms of women desirous
to go on, but frightened. It is not true that I stopped to think for
one moment who those women were; but feeling that they must be in the
right, and the man in the wrong as usual, without two endeavours I was
running at full speed—and in those days that was something—merely to
help the right, and stop the wrong. And in less time than it takes to
tell it, I was one of the party. Then I saw that the ladies were Mrs.
Marker, and the lovely young maiden, who had been with her in church.

“Oh, Master Orchardson, you will take our part,” Mrs. Marker cried, as
she ran up to me; “you will take our part, as every good man must. That
bad man says that we shall not cross the bridge, without—without—oh, it
is too dreadful!”

“Without paying toll to me—this is kissing-bridge, and the wood is now
kissing the water. ’Tis a dangerous job to take ladies across. Kit,
you are come just in time to help. Let us have toll at the outset, and
double toll upon landing, my boy. You take my lady Marker, Kit, because
she is getting heavy; and I will take Miss Fairthorn.”

Sam Henderson spoke these words as if we had nothing to do but obey
him. Perhaps as a man who was instructing horses, he had imbibed too
much of the upper part. At any rate, I did not find it my duty to fall
beneath his ordering. And as if to make me stand to my own thoughts,
the sweetest and most pitiful glance that had ever come to meet me,
came straight to my heart from a shadowy nook, where the beautiful maid
was shrinking.

“Sam Henderson, none of this rubbish!” I shouted, for the roar of the
water would have drowned soft words. “It is a coward’s job to frighten
women. A man should see first what the danger is.”

Before he could come up to strike me, as his first intention seemed
to be, I ran across the timbers, which were bowing and trembling with
the strain upon the upright posts, as well as the wash upon their
nether sides. And I saw that the risk was increasing with each moment,
for the dam at the bottom of Tim Osborne’s meadow, not more than a
gunshot above us, was beginning to yield, and the flood checked by it
was trembling like a trodden hay-rick. Upon this I ran back, and said,
“Now, ladies, if cross you must, you must do it at once.”

“Kit, you are a fool. There is no danger,” Sam Henderson shouted
wrathfully. “Who is the coward that frightens ladies now? But if you
must poke in your oar without leave, you go first with Mother Marker,
and I will come after you, with the young lady.”

The maiden shrank back from his hand, and I saw that good Mrs. Marker
was pained by his words. “Mother Marker will go first,” she said, “but
with no thanks to you, Mr. Henderson.”

Her spirit was up, but her hands were trembling, as I took her
Prayer-book from them.

“I may be a fool, but I am not a cub,” I answered with a gaze that made
Henderson scowl; “I would rather frighten ladies than insult them. Now,
Mrs. Marker, give me one of your nice little hands, and have no fear.”

The house-keeping lady put forth one hand, with a tender look at it,
because it had been praised, and then she put forth one brave foot,
and I was only afraid of her going too fast. The water splashed up
between the three-inch planks, for the lady was of some substance; but
she landed very well, and back I ran to see about her young companion.

“I will not go with you sir; I will go alone. You do not behave like
a gentleman,” she was crying in great distress, as I came up, and Sam
Henderson had hold of both her hands. This enraged me so that I forgot
good manners, for I should not have done what I did before a lady. I
struck Sam heavily between the eyes, and if I had not caught him by the
collar, nothing could have saved him from falling through the bush,
into the deep eddy under the planks. As soon as I had done it, I was
angry with myself, for Sam was not a bad fellow at all, when in his
best condition. But now there was no time to dwell upon that, for the
flood was arising and rolling in loops, like the back of a cat who has
descried a dog.

“Now or never, Miss,” I cried; “the dam has given; in a minute, this
bridge will be swept clean away.”

She showed such bright sense as I never saw before, and never can hope
to see in anybody else, however they may laugh through want of it.
Without a word, or even a glance at me, she railed up her dress into a
wondrous little circle, and gave me a hand which I had not the strength
to think of, for fear of forgetting all the world outside. Taking it
gently in my coarse hard palm, I said, “Come,” and she came like an

As I led her across, all my gaze was upon her; and this was a good
thing for both of us. For a scream from Mrs. Marker and a dreadful
shout from Sam—who came staggering up to the brink and caught the
handrail, just as we were shaking upon the middle dip—these, and a
great roar coming down the meadows, would probably have taken all
my wits away, if they had been within me, as at ordinary times. But
heeding only that which I was holding, I went in a leisurely and steady
manner which often makes the best of danger, and set the maiden safe
upon the high stone at the end, and turned round to see what was coming.

Before I had time to do this, it was upon me, whirling me back with a
blow of heavy timber, and washing me with all my best clothes on into
the hedge behind the lane. Then a rush of brown water, like a drove of
wild cattle leaping on one another’s backs, went by, and the bridge was
gone with it, like a straw hat in the wind. But the stone upon which
the young lady stood was unmoved although surrounded, and I made signs
to her—for to speak was useless—to lay hold of a branch which hung over
her head. As she did so, she smiled at me, even in that terror; and I
felt that I would go through a thousandfold the peril for the chance of
being so rewarded.

Suddenly, as suddenly as it had mounted, the bulk of the roaring flood
fell again, and the wreck of the handrail and some lighter spars of the
bridge hung dangling by their chains. And soon as the peril was passed,
it was hard to believe that there had been much of it. But any one
listening to Mrs. Marker, as she came down the hill when it was over,
must have believed that I had done something very gallant and almost
heroic. But I had done nothing more than I have told; and it is not
very likely that I would make too little of it.

“Brave young man!” cried Mrs. Marker, panting, and ready to embrace me,
if I had only been dry; “you have saved our lives, and I would say it,
if it were my last moment. Miss Kitty, I never saw such valour. Did you
ever, in all your life, dear?”

“Never, dear, never! Though I had not the least idea what this
gentleman was doing, till he had done it. Oh, he must be sadly knocked
about. Let me come down, and help him.”

“He put you up there, and he shall fetch you down. Nobody else has the
right to do it. Mr. Orchardson, don’t be afraid; assist her.”

Now this shows how women have their wits about them, even at moments
most critical. The housekeeper had fled with no small alacrity,
when the flood came roaring; and now with equal promptitude she had
returned, and discovered how best to reward me.

“I think you might give me a hand,” said the young lady, still mounted
on the high stone with our parish-mark, upon which by some instinct I
had placed her.

“I cannot; I am trembling like an aspen-leaf,” Mrs. Marker replied,
though she looked firm enough; “but our gallant preserver is as strong
as he is brave. Don’t be afraid of his touching you, because he is a
little damp, Miss Kitty.”

This was truly clever of her, and it stopped all reasoning. With
a glance of reproach, the maiden gathered her loosened cloak more
tightly, and then gave me both her hands and sprang; and I managed it
so that she slid down into my arms. This was not what she intended, but
there was no help for it, the ground being very slippery after such a
flood. She seemed lighter than a feather, and more buoyant than a cork;
though some of that conclusion perhaps was due to my impressions. Be
that either way, I could never have believed that anything so lovely
would be ever in my hold; and the power of it drove away my presence
of mind so badly, that I was very near forgetting the proper time for
letting go.

And this was no wonder, when I come to think about it; the only wonder
was that I could show such self-command. For the breath of her lips was
almost on mine, and her blushes so near that I seemed to feel their
glow, and the deep rich blue of her eyes so close that they were like
an opening into heaven. My entire gift of words was gone, and I knew
not what I did or thought.

But suddenly a shout—or a speech if one could take it so—of vulgar
insolence and jealousy most contemptible, broke on my lofty condition.
Sam Henderson had been left in black dudgeon on the other side of the
water, and the bridge being swept away, he could not get at us. We had
forgotten all about him; however, he had managed to run away, when the
great billow came from the bursting of the sluice; and now he showed
his manners and his thankfulness to God, by coming to the bank and
shouting, while he grinned, and clapped his hands in mockery,—

“Kit and Kitty! Kit and Kitty! That’s what I call coming it strong;
and upon a Sunday evening! Mother Marker, do you mean to put up with
that? See if I don’t tell your Missus. Kit and Kitty! O Lord, oh Lord!
’Tis as good as a play, and we don’t get much of that sort of fun in
Sunbury. Holloa! What the deuce—”

His speech was ended, for I had caught up a big dollop of clod from the
relics of the flood, and delivered it into his throat so truly that his
red satin fall and mock-diamond pin—which were tenfold more sacred to
him than the Sabbath—were mashed up into one big lump of mud, together
with the beard he cherished. Labouring to utter some foul words, he
shook his fist at me and departed.



THERE seem to be many ways of taking the very simplest fact we meet
and if any man was sure to take things by his own light, it was my
good Uncle. When a friend, or even a useful neighbour, offered a free
opinion, my Uncle Cornelius would look at him, say never a word, but
be almost certain to go downright against that particular view. One of
his favourite sayings was, “Every man has a right to his own opinion,”
although he was a strict Conservative—and of that right he was so
jealous, that he hated to have his opinions shared. And this was a very
lucky thing for me, as I cannot help seeing and saying.

For the very next morning, a neighbour came in (when I was gone
prowling, I need not say where), and having some business, he told
Tabby Tapscott to show him where her master was most likely to be
found. This gentleman was Mr. Rasp, the baker, who kept two women, a
man, and a boy, and did the finest trade in Sunbury. And what he wanted
now was to accept my Uncle’s offer, at which he had hum’d and hawed a
week ago, of ten sacks of chat potatoes at fifteen pence a bushel, for
the purpose of mixing with his best white bread. By the post of that
morning Mr. Rasp had heard from the great flour-mills at Uxbridge, that
good grindings were gone up six shillings a quarter, and sure to be
quoted still higher next week, by reason of the cold, wet harvest. But
he did not intend to tell Uncle Corny this.

That excellent gardener was under his big wall, which had formed
part of the monastic enclosure, and was therefore the best piece of
brickwork in the parish, as well as a warm home and sure fortress to
the peach and nectarine. This wall had its aspect about S.S.E., the
best that can be for fruit-trees, and was flanked with return walls
at either end; and the sunshine, whenever there seemed to be any,
was dwelling and blushing in this kind embrace. The summers might be
bitter—as they generally are—but if ever a peach donned crimson velvet
in the South of England out of doors, it was sure to be sitting upon
this old red wall and looking out for Uncle Corny.

Mr. Cornelius Orchardson, as most people called him when they tried
to get his money, glanced over his shoulder when he heard the baker
coming, and then began to drive a nail with more than usual care. Not
that he ever drove any nail rashly, such an act was forbidden by his
constitution; but that he now was in his deepest calm, as every man
ought to be in the neighbourhood of a bargain. His manner was always
collected and dry, and his words quite as few as were needful; and he
never showed any desire to get the better of any one, only a sense
of contentment, whenever he was not robbed. This is often the case
with broad-shouldered people, if they only move quietly and are not
flurried; and my good Uncle Corny possessed in his way every one of
these elements of honesty.

“Good morning, Mr. Orchardson!” said Rasp the baker. “What a pleasure
it is to see a glimpse of sun at last! And what a fine colour these red
bricks do give you!”

“As good as the bakehouse,” said my Uncle shortly. “But look out where
you are treading, Rasp. I want every one of them strawberry-runners.
What brings you here? I am rather busy now.”

“Well, I happened to see as your door was open, so I thought I’d just
jog your memory, to have them potatoes put up in the dry, while I’ve
got my copper lighted.”

“Potatoes! Why, you would not have them, Rasp. You said fifteen pence a
bushel was a deal too much, and potatoes were all water such a year as
this. And now I’ve got a better customer.”

“Well, it don’t matter much either way,” said the baker; “but I always
took you, Mr. Orchardson, to be a man of your word, sir—a man of your

“So I am. But I know what my words are; and we came to no agreement.
Your very last words were—‘A shilling, and no more.’ Can you deny that,

“Well, I didn’t put it down, sir, and my memory plays tricks. But I
told my wife that it was all settled; and she said, ‘Oh, I do like to
deal with Mr. Orchardson, he gives such good measure.’ So I brought
round the money in this little bag, thirty-seven shillings and
sixpence. Never mind for a receipt, sir; everybody knows what you are.”

“Yes, so they do,” answered Uncle Corny; “they’d rather believe me than
you, Master baker. Now how much is flour gone up this morning, and
floury potatoes to follow it? Never a chat goes out of my gate, under
one and sixpence a bushel.”

“This sort of thing is too much for me. There is something altogether
wrong with the times. There is no living to be made out of them.”
Mr. Rasp shook his head at the peaches on the wall, as if they were
dainties he must not dare to look at.

“Rasp, you shall have a peach,” declared my Uncle Corny, for he was
a man who had come to a good deal of wisdom; “you shall have the
best peach on the whole of this wall, and that means about the best
in England. I will not be put out with you, Rasp, for making a fine
effort to cheat me. You are a baker; and you cannot help it.”

If any other man in Sunbury was proud of his honesty, so was Rasp;
and taking this speech as a compliment to it, he smiled and pulled a
paper-bag from his pocket, to receive the best peach on the wall for
his wife.

“What a difference one day’s sun has made! At one time I doubted if
they would colour, for it is the worst summer I have known for many
years. But they were all ready, as a maiden is to blush, when she
expects her sweetheart’s name. With all my experience, I could scarcely
have believed it; what a change since Saturday! But ‘live and learn’ is
the gardener’s rule. _Galande_, the best peach of all, in my opinion,
is not yet ripe; but _Grosse Mignonne_ is, and though rather woolly in
a year like ’57, it is first-rate in a cool season. Observe the red
spots near the caudal cavity—why bless my heart, Rasp, I meant that for
your wife!”

“My wife has a very sad toothache to-day, and she would never forgive
me if I made it worse. But what wonderful things they are to run!”

This baker had a gentle streak of juice in either runnel of his chin,
which was shaped like a well-fed _fleur-de-lis_; and he wiped it all
dry with the face of the bag, upon which his own name was printed.

“I knows a good thing, when I sees it; and that’s more than a woman in
a hundred does. Don’t believe they can taste, or at least very few of
them. Why, they’d sooner have tea than a glass of good beer! Howsoever,
that’s nought to do with business. Mr. Orchardson, what’s your lowest
figure? With a wall of fruit coming on like them, sixpence apiece and
some thousands of them, you mustn’t be hard on a neighbour.”

My Uncle sat down on his four-legged stool (which had bars across the
feet, for fear of sinking, when the ground was spongy), and he pulled
his bag of vamp-leather to the middle of his waistcoat, and felt for a
shred and a nail. He had learned that it never ends in satisfaction, if
a man grows excited in view of a bargain, or even shows any desire to
deal. Then he put up his elbow, and tapped the nail in, without hitting
it hard, as the ignorant do.

“Come, I’ll make a fair offer,” the baker exclaimed, for he never let
business do justice to itself; “an offer that you might call handsome,
if you was looking at it in a large point of view. I’ll take fifty
bushels at fifteen pence, pick ’em over myself, for the pigs and the
men; and if any crusty people turn up, why here I am!”

“Rasp, you make a very great mistake,” said my Uncle, turning round
upon his stool, and confronting him with strong honesty, “if you
suppose that I have anything to do with the use you make of my
potatoes. I sell you my goods for the utmost I can get, and you take
good care that it is very little. What you do with them afterwards is
no concern of mine. I owe you no thanks, and you know me not from Adam
the moment you have paid me. This is the doctrine of free-trade—you
recognize everything, except men.”

“Tell you what it is,” replied the baker; “sooner than vex you, Mr.
Orchardson, I’ll give sixteen pence all round, just as they come out of
the row. Who could say fairer than that now?”

“Eighteen is the money. Not a farthing under. From all that I can hear,
it will be twenty pence to-morrow. Why, here’s another fine peach fit
to come! I shall send it to your wife, and tell her you ate hers.”

The gardener merrily nailed away, while the baker was working his hands
for nothing. “You would never do such a thing as that,” he said; “a
single man have no call to understand a woman; but he knows what their
nature is, or why did he avoid them? My wife is as good a woman as can
be; but none of them was ever known to be quite perfect. If it must be
eighteen, it must—and I’ll take fifty.”

“Ah, couldn’t I tell you a bit of news?” said the baker, as he
counted out the money. “You are such a silent man, Mr. Orchardson,
that a man of the world is afraid of you. And the young fellow, your
own nevvy—well, he may take after you in speech, but not about the
ladies—ah, you never would believe it!”

“Well, then, keep it to yourself, that’s all. I don’t want to hear a
word against young Kit. And what’s more—if I heard fifty, I wouldn’t
believe one of them.”

“No more wouldn’t I. He’s as steady a young fellow as ever drove a
tax-cart. And so quiet in his manners, why, you wouldn’t think that

“His mother was a lady of birth and breeding. That’s where he gets his
manners from; though there’s plenty in our family for folk that deserve
them. Out with your news, man, whatever it is.”

“Well, it don’t go again him much,” the baker replied, with some
fear—for my Uncle’s face was stern, and the wall-hammer swung in his
brown right hand; “and indeed you might take it the other way, if he
had done it all on his road home from church. You know the bridge over
the Halliford brook, or at least where it was, for it’s all washed
away, as you heard very likely this morning. What right had your nevvy
there, going on for dark?”

My Uncle was a rather large-minded man; but without being loose, or
superior. “Rasp, if it comes to that,” he said, “what right have you
and I to be anywhere?”

“That’s neither here nor there,” answered the baker, having always been
a man of business; “but wherever I go, I pay my way. However, your Kit
was down there, and no mistake. What you think he done? He punched Sam
Henderson’s head to begin with, for fear of him giving any help, and
then he jumped into the water, that was coming like a house on fire
from Tim Osborne’s dam, and out of it he pulled Mother Marker, and the
pretty young lady as had been in church.”

“Kit can swim,” said my Uncle shortly. “It is a very dangerous trick to
learn, being bound to jump in, whenever any one is drowning. Did the
women go in, for him to pull them out?”

“Ah, you never did think much of them, Mr. Corny; but you never had no
inskin experience. Take ’em all round, they are pretty nigh as good
as we are. But they never jumped in—no, you mustn’t say that. They
were bound to go home, and they were doing of it, till the flood took
their legs from under them. Mrs. Marker have been, this very morning,
conversing along of my good missus, and was likely to stop when I was
forced to come away, and you should hear her go on about your Kit! And
nobody knows if she has any friends. I am told when her time comes to
go to heaven, she will have the disposal of four hundred pounds.”

“You be off to your wife!” cried Uncle Corny; “Mrs. Marker is quite a
young woman yet, but old enough to have discovered what men are. Go to
your work, Rasp. I hate all gossip. But I am glad that Kit thrashed Sam



EVERYBODY knows, as he reads his newspaper, that nothing has ever
yet happened in the world with enough of precision and accuracy to
get itself described, by those who saw it, in the same, or in even
a similar manner. No wonder then that my little adventure—if I have
any right to call it mine—presented itself in many different lights,
not only to the people among whom it spread, but even to the few who
were present there and then. Mrs. Jenny Marker’s account of what had
happened was already very grand that Sunday eve; but as soon as she had
slept and dreamed upon it, her great command of words proved unequal
to the call made at the same moment by the mind and heart. Everybody
listened, for her practice was to pay every little bill upon a Monday
morning; and almost everybody was convinced that she was right.

“Miraculous is the only word that I can think of,” she said to Mrs.
Cutthumb, who sold tin-tacks and cabbages; “not a miracle only of the
sandy desert, but of the places where the trees and waters grow.”

“The Jordan perhaps you means, Mrs. Marker, ma’am? Or did you please to
have in your mind the Red Sea?”

“They were both in my mind, and both come uppermost at the same moment,
Mrs. Cutthumb. But the best authorities inform us now that we must not
look for more than we can understand. Yet I cannot understand how Kit
Orchardson contrived after pulling me out to pull out our Miss Kitty.
But look, here he comes! Why, he is everywhere almost. He seems to
swing along so. His uncle ought to work him harder. Not that he is
impudent. No one can say that of him. Too bashful for a man, in my
opinion. But he seems to have taken such a liking to me; and I must be
his senior by a considerable time. I will go into your parlour, my dear
Mrs. Cutthumb, and then I can look out for our poor Miss Kitty—ah, she
is so very young, and no one to stand up for her!”

“Excuse me, Miss Marker, if you please,” said Mrs. Cutthumb; “but
if I may make so bold to say, you are very young yourself, Miss, in
years, though not in worship. And to be run away with from school is
a thing that may occur to any girl when bootiful. But concerning of
Miss Kitty—bless her innocent young face!—what you was pleased to say,
ma’am, is most surprising.”

“No, Mrs. Cutthumb, very far from that, when you come to consider what
human nature is. I never could do such things myself; I never could
sleep easy in my bed if I thought that they ever could be imputed to
me. But when we look at things it is our duty to remember that the
world is made up of different people from what we are.”

“What experience you have had, ma’am, and yet keeping your complexion
so! Ah, if my poor Cutthumb could have kept away from the imperial!
But he said it were the duty of a Briton, and he done it. Sally, get
away into the back yard with your dolly. I beg your pardon, ma’am, for
interrupting you of your words so.”

“Well, one thing I make a point of is,” Mrs. Marker continued with a
gentle frown, “never to enter into any domestic affairs, though without
any bias of any sort, out of doors. We all have enough, as you know,
Mrs. Cutthumb, and sometimes more than we can manage, to regulate our
own histories. Miss Coldpepper is a remarkable lady, so very, so highly
superior; but her niece, our Miss Kitty, does not seem as yet to take
after her in that particular; and scarcely to be wondered at, when you
remember that she is not her niece at all of rights. But this is not a
question to interest you much, nor any one outside of what I might call
the Coldpepper domesticity.”

“What superior words you always do have, as it were, in your muff, Mrs.
Marker! But if you please to mean, Miss—being still so young I slips
into it naturally—the Coldpepper Manor, why I was born upon it, and so
was my parents before me. And that makes it natural, as you might say,
and proper for me to have a word to say about them. I remember all the
Coldpeppers since I was that high; and it shall never go no further.”

“There is nothing to conceal. You must never fancy that of them. The
Coldpeppers always were a haughty race, and headstrong; but bold, and
outspoken, and defying of their neighbours. It was bad for any one
who crossed them: you know that, if you remember old Squire Nicholas.
But Miss Kitty Fairthorn is not a Coldpepper. You see you don’t know
everything about them, Mrs. Cutthumb. The captain had been married
before he ever saw Miss Monica.”

“Lor’, Mrs. Marker, you quite take my breath away! And yet I might
have known it, I was bound almost to know it, the moment one comes to
reflection. ‘Kitty’s’ not a name at all becoming to the rank of the
Manor of Coldpepper. I’ve been wondering about it many’s the time;
Arabella and Monica sounds something like; but Kitty isn’t fit, except
for women that has to get their own livelihood. Well, it eases my mind
that she is not a Coldpepper.”

“No, Mrs. Cutthumb; but she is a Fairthorn; and from all I hear the
Fairthorns are much better known, in the great world of London, than
our Coldpeppers. Captain Fairthorn is a man who has discovered more
than the whole world knew in our fathers’ days. He can make a bell ring
in John o’ Groat’s house, he can blow up a cliff at the Land’s End from
London, he knows every wrinkle at the bottom of the sea, he can make a
ghost stand at eight corners of the room.”

“Can he save his own soul, ma’am?” the greengrocer asked in a solemn
voice, being a strict Wesleyan. “Them vanities, falsely called Science
nowadays, is the depth of the snare of the Evil One. A learned man
knows all the bottom of the sea, and leaves his own child to be drowned
in a brook, without it was for young Kit Orchardson. Can he save his
own soul, Mrs. Marker, ma’am?”

“Well, if I was to go by guesswork, I should say that he has not got
very much of that to call his own. You know what Miss Monica was;
although she has been such a time away from Sunbury. She took her
first husband in spite of her father, and the second without a word to
anybody. She had a son and two daughters by the Honourable Tom Bulwrag,
and within a year after him she carried off poor Captain, who is now
called Professor Fairthorn. But there, I am told, though I never set
eyes on him, being made up of telegraphs and batteries, and magnesia,
and a thing they call hiderography, he is hardly ever at home for a
week together, and knows more about the ocean’s bed than about his own.
And a lucky thing for him; for wouldn’t she be a nagger, if ever she
could get the opportunity?”

“That seems to be most unnatural, and against the will of the
Almighty,” Mrs. Cutthumb replied after serious thought, “that a lady
should wish to reprove her husband, and yet find no ear to put it into.
With all his inventions for doing away distance, he ought to be able to
manage it.”

“It would make no difference, if he did, and could she expect him to
pay for it? His mind is so taken up when he is at home, that she might
as well go on at the bedpost. And if he was to open up his wires, it
would be at his discretion to receive it all. This makes her rather
harsh, as you can understand, with any one that has no help for it. And
our poor Miss Kitty being always in the way, and a rival as it were to
her own children, oh she does know what pepper is, hot and cold, and
every colour!”

“Poor lamb! And she do look so innocent and sweet, and so deserving of
a real mother. No father to look after her, by your own account, ma’am,
and a step-mother doing it according to her liking. Why don’t she run
away, such a booty as she is?”

“She is too sweet-tempered and well-principled for that. And she thinks
all the world of her father; all the more, no doubt, because he cannot
attend to her. His time is too precious for him to mind his daughter.
Not that he is money-making—far the other way. Those great discoverers,
as I have heard say, are the last to discover the holes in their
pockets. Money, Mrs. Cutthumb has been too long discovered for him to
take any heed of it. And that makes another source of trouble in the
household. To think of our sending the big carriage and two footmen, to
find a young lady in the third class at Feltham! I took care to keep it
from Miss Coldpepper.”

“Oh, it would have been shocking,” cried the widow with her hands up.
“Why, the third class ain’t good enough for a dead pig to drain in,
any ways on the South-Western line. Well, ma’am, and how did Miss
Coldpepper take it?”

“Of these things I never speak out of the house. We are liable to err,
the very best of us, I believe, and I know it from my own feelings.
Those last twenty boxes of Star matches we had from you, Mrs. Cutthumb,
were stars, and no mistake. Shooting stars they should be labelled.
They go off like a cannon, I have had to pay for three new aprons, and
it was a mercy they didn’t set the house afire.”

“Oh, they hussies—they never know how to strike them; and your Miss
Coldpepper, she does change so often. Never so much as a month, ma’am,
without some of them giving warning.”

“That is no concern of yours, Mrs. Cutthumb. If you speak in this low
style of Coldpepper Manor, it will have to withdraw its custom, ma’am,
from your—your little establishment.”

Mrs. Jenny Marker, as she spoke thus, gathered in her jacket, which
was plaited with blue velvet,—because she was proud of her figure, or
at least so some people said who could not well get at her pockets—and
although she meant no more by this than to assert her own dignity,
Mrs. Cutthumb, with all the fine feelings of a widow, was naturally
hurt, and showed it. And strange enough to say, though it seems such a
trifle, what ensued made a very great difference to me.

“I am truly grieved, madam,” she said with a curtsey, “that my little
house, which is the best I can afford, and my little shop, which was
set up for me by very kind neighbours as owned no manors, when it
pleased the Almighty to afflict me lo, and deprive me of a good man who
could always pay his sent, and never would allow me to be put upon—”

“A model husband, no doubt, Mrs. Cutthumb; except as I fancy you
observed just now, for his devotion to the imperial pint,—or perhaps I
should say gallon.”

“May you never have a worse, if you ever catches any! And high time
in life, ma’am, for you, Miss Jenny Marker, or Mrs. whichever you may
be, and nobody in Sunbury knows the bottom of it, to be thinking a
little now of your soul, ma’am, and less of your body, and the other
things that perish. You draw in your cloak, ma’am, or it isn’t a cloak,
nothing so suitable and sensible as that, just as if my poor goods
wasn’t good enough to touch it! Perhaps that’s the reason why you beats
them down so. I beg you to remember, Jenny Marker, that I consider
myself as good as you are, madam, though I am not tricked out with
gew-gaws and fal-lals. And what I eats, I earns, ma’am, and not the
bread of servitude.”

“That will do, my good woman. I never lose my temper; though I have
never been insulted before like this, even by the lowest people. Send
in your little bill, this very afternoon, if one of your wonderful
neighbours will be good enough to make it out for you, as you have
never been taught to write, poor thing! But whoever does it must not
forget to deduct the price of three rotten French eggs.”



WHILE that bitter war was raging, I enjoyed a peaceful and gentle
season. It happened that I had come up our village, on a matter of
strict business, at a time of day not at all unlikely to be the very
time of day mentioned over-night, as the one that would suit Mrs.
Marker and Miss Fairthorn for doing a little business in our village.
This might be explained, without any imputation on any one I have the
pleasure of knowing, for all of them will admit at once that it needs
no explanation. It is enough to say, that when I had the honour of
seeing two ladies safe home last night, after pulling them out of the
flood—as they both maintained, though never in it—no little gratitude
had been expressed, and much good-will had been felt all round. And it
would have been hard upon that state of things, if any “Good-bye” had
been said for ever.

For my part, although I had no great fear of being knocked on the head
by Sam Henderson, it might have seemed haughty and even unfeeling, if
I had insisted too strongly upon my ability to take care of myself.
Therefore I allowed them to consider me in peril; and to this I was
partly indebted perhaps for the opportunity of meeting them on Monday.
It is true that I had not learned half as much, about matters of the
deepest interest to me, as Mrs. Cutthumb, without any claim to such
knowledge, was now possessed of; but this might fairly be expected, for
women have always been convinced that men have no right to know half as
much as themselves. “Let him find it out, I am not going to tell him,”
is their too frequent attitude, while they feel it a duty to their own
sex to pour out almost everything.

However, I have no desire to complain, and perhaps it is better thus;
for if we knew all of their affairs, we might think less about them.
And I was in a very deep condition of interest and wonder, not only
from the hints I had received, but also from the manifold additions of
my fancy. In fact, it was far more than I could do, to confine my heart
to its proper work when I saw those two ladies come to do a little

At that time, there were only about a dozen of the houses, in the
narrow street that runs along the river, which allowed the importance
of selling to compete with the necessity of dwelling. And the few, that
did appear inclined to do a little trade, if coaxed into it, were half
ashamed of their late concession to the spirit of the age. No man had
yet appeared who shatters the ancestral sense of congruity, who routs
up the natives, as a terrier bullies mastiffs, and scarcely even leaves
them their own bones. And it may be maintained, that people got things
better, and found them last longer than they ever do now. And this was
only natural, because it always took a much longer time to buy them.

This enabled me to take my time about my own business, without any risk
of being left behind by the lady housekeeper and her fair companion.
From time to time I assured myself by a glance between flower-pots,
or among drapery, that my quest was not gone astray, that as yet I
had not lost all that I cared to see, and that I could keep in my own
background, while thinking of things far beyond me.

It never had been my manner yet to be much afraid of anything; not
that I stood at all upon my valour, but simply because, to the best of
my knowledge, I had no enemy anywhere. Yet now, very much to my own
surprise, instead of proper courage, I was full of little doubts, and
more misgivings than I can at all describe, and even a tendency to run
away, and try to forget the very thing I was longing for. And I knew
for a certainty that if the matter came to the very best opportunity, I
was quite sure to do my very worst, and cut a despicable figure, to my
own undoing.

I tried to recover myself, by doing a few strokes of business on my
own account, going into the butcher’s, and complaining sadly that he
now weighed the foot in with the leg of mutton—a privilege only to
be claimed by lamb—but he said that it now was ordained by nature,
and asked how I expected a poor sheep to walk. I knew that his logic
would not go upon all-fours, but my wits were so loose that I let it
pass; and at that very moment I discovered, betwixt the hearts of two
bullocks, something very near my own. Miss Kitty Fairthorn had been set
free by Mrs. Jenny Marker, while the housekeeper was driving a bargain
in soft goods, unfit for young comprehension. After that, she was to go
on for a talk with Widow Cutthumb, and meanwhile the young lady might
look at the river, which was now rolling grandly in turbulent flood.

It was rather a shy and a delicate thing for me to go also in that
direction; and the butcher (who never confined his attention to his own
mutton) was as sure as could be to come out of his door, and look all
up the lane. For Sunbury people, as long as I have known them, take a
deep interest in one another’s doings; and all the more so, when they
happen to perceive that their sympathy is not requested. Wherefore I
hurried back to ask another question, as if there were nothing in my
mind but meat, and then turned up an alley, which would lead me round
the back of some houses to the Halliford Road further on.

There were many things now that I might have done, more sensible haply
than what I did. I might have gone home, and had bread and cheese,
and a glass of mild ale with Uncle Corny; or if that had seemed a
little too ignoble, why not wander along the upper road, and thence
survey, as from a terrace—which used to be the origin of the word
“contemplate”—the many distant mazes of the flooded river, the trees
along the margin bowing over their foundations, the weak smile of
autumnal sunshine over the wrongs of its own neglect, and perhaps in
the foreground a slender figure, standing as if it were nothing in the

However, what I did was to go straight on towards the one in the world
who was all the world to me. By what process of reason, or unreason, or
pure stupid heart, I was come in such haste to this state of mind, is
more than I can explain to any, and I did not even try to explain it to
myself. There was my condition, right or wrong; and those who cannot
understand it may be proud of their cool wisdom; and I without harm may
be sorry for them.

She wore a grey cloak looking wonderfully simple, yet gathered in
small at her beautiful waist, and trimmed at the skirts, and over two
little pockets, with a soft blue fur called Vicunha. And she carried a
little muff of the same material, and the strings of her hat (which was
like a sea-shell) were also of a blue tint very sweetly matching. But
the blue that was sweetest and richest of all was that of her large,
soft, loving eyes, than which it is impossible for any poet to imagine
anything in heaven more lovely.

However, I shall not go on any more about her, though things may slip
out unawares; and without being rude, I may say plainly, that I have
a right to keep such matters to myself. For a short time, I was at a
loss for the commonest presence of mind, and stood wondering; hoping
that she would turn round, and yet fearing that she might think I had
no business there. Her whole attention was taken up, as I knew by her
attitude—for already I seemed to have a gift of understanding her—not
with any thought of people near her, but with the grandeur of the
rolling flood, and the breadth of quiet lake beyond it. She was saying
to herself—so far as I could tell—“What is the use of such a little dot
as I am, and what is the value of my little troubles, when the mighty
world goes on like this, and all I can do would not make a wrinkle and
scarcely a flutter on the vast expanse?”

Then suddenly, an if in dread of her own thoughts, she turned round and
saw me within a landyard of her. As if she had been taken in a rosy
fog—for we are all ashamed of large thoughts, when caught in them—she
coloured to the tint of one of Uncle Corny’s peaches, though without
any of the spots he was so proud of; and then she drew one hand from
her blue muff, and I found it so soft and warm and precious, that I
almost forgot to let it go again.

“Oh, how I am surprised to see you here!” she said, as if my general
place of residence was the moon; and probably I looked as if it should
be so.

“And I am even more amazed to see you here,” I answered without any of
my wits to help me, “but I came to do a little bit of business with the
butcher. He has been doing things he had no right to do.”

“I have often been told that they are inclined to take advantage,” she
replied, with a look which convinced me at once that she would make
a first-rate housekeeper, for what butcher could resist it? “My dear
father would have much trouble with them, if, if—I mean if he were at
all allowed to have it. But he is always so full of great things.”

“Oh, what a happy man he must be! I have heard that he is the most
clever, and learned, and one of the most celebrated men in London.”

I may not have heard all that, but still I was perfectly justified in
saying it, for it made her talk; and every time she spoke, her voice
sounded sweeter than it did the time before.

“You have been told the truth; it is acknowledged universally,” she
went on as if there were no fame to equal his, and with a sparkle in
her blue eyes, as if a star had flashed in heaven; “there seems to be
nothing that he does not know, and nothing that he does not improve by
his knowledge, and make useful for—I mean for the world at large. How
I can be his child, and yet so stupid and slow-witted, is a thing that
amazes me, and I am trying always not to think of it.”

“I am sure you are not stupid. I am sure you are very quick-witted. I
never saw any one half so clever, and accomplished, and ladylike, and
gentle, and”—“lovely” was the word I was about to use; but she stopped
me, with a smile that would have stopped a rushing bull.

“I am showing my quick wits now,” she said, presenting the charm of her
hand again, “by never even thanking you for all you did last evening.
I was thinking before you appeared, that but for you I should probably
be tossing in these wild waters now, or probably carried down as far as
London Bridge, without a chance even of being buried. And it made me so
sad, when I remembered that it would make no difference to any one.”

“How can you say such a dreadful thing?” I exclaimed with great
indignation, for her eyes that had been so full of light were darkened
with sadness, and turned away; “it is not true that I saved you in the
least, though I wish that I had; I should deserve to live for ever; but
you speak as if no one in the world had any love for the sweetest, and
best, and most lovely creature in it.”

This was going rather far, I must confess; not that any word of it
was at all exaggerated, or even approached the proper mark; but that
it might seem a little early, on the part of one who had never had
the pleasure of beholding the lady, till the previous afternoon. The
remembrance of this was very awkward to me, and I was wild with myself,
but could not stop the mischief now.

“Will you oblige me, Mr. Orchardson,” she asked, as gently as if I had
shown no folly, “by just looking down or up the village, to see if Mrs.
Marker is coming. She was to have been here ten minutes ago; and we
have to make a long round now, since the bridge on the lower road is
washed away. I ought not to trouble you; but I never know exactly where
I am in country places, although I love the country so.”

This was more than I deserved; for a good box on the ears was the
proper reward for my frowardness, and I should have been less abashed
by it. “I am a bigger cad than Sam Henderson himself,” I whispered with
a timid glance at her. But she seemed at a loss to know what my meaning
was; and so with a deep but very clumsy bow, I departed to do her

Before I had taken many steps, there appeared the lady housekeeper in
the distance, walking with great dignity, perhaps to console herself
for the insolence of that Widow Cutthumb. Of this I knew nothing as
yet, though it was plain that something unrighteous had disturbed
her. And this made my humble demeanour more soothing and persuasive
to her upright mind. After shaking her hand very warmly and paying
a well-deserved compliment to her fine colour, I ventured to implore
a little favour, which the sight of our garden wall sparkling in the
sunshine, for it was newly topped with broken glass, suggested by some
good luck to me.

“Oh, if you would only come,” I said, “and see my Uncle’s trees
to-morrow! They are at their very best this week, before we begin to
gather largely. The pears are hanging down, so that we have had to prop
the branches, and the plums are as thick as eggs together, when the hen
is sitting; only instead of being pale, some are of the richest gold,
and some of a deep purple, like—like that magnificent amethyst you
wear; and the peaches on the wall—you might almost compare these to a
lady’s cheeks, when a gentleman tells her of her beauty—”

“Really, Mr. Orchardson, you are quite a poet!”

“And when you get tired of looking at them, and tasting the ripest,
all you have to do is to come into the vinery, and sit beneath the
leaves, and look all along it, wherever the clusters leave any room to
look, until you don’t know which you like the best, the appearance of
the black or the white ones, because so much depends upon the light.
And then Uncle Corny comes with a pair of scissors, and says—‘Ma’am,
that is not the way to look at it. The proof of the pudding is in the
eating,’ and he hands you in a vine-leaf, being careful where he cuts
it, a jet-black shoulder of Black Hamburgh, and an amber-coloured
triplet of White Muscat.”

“Mr. Orchardson, you are making my mouth water, if a vulgar expression
may be allowed to one who eats the bread of servitude.” I wondered
to hear her speak thus, though I saw that she had been aggrieved by
somebody. “And if you will be at home to-morrow afternoon, perhaps
I might obtain permission to leave my mistress for an hour or two.
I might walk down about four o’clock, when I have finished all the
blacking of the boots.”

Something with a spiteful tang to it was rankling in her mind, as I
perceived; but having no right to ask, I just lifted my hat and gazed
at her gold chain and broach. Then a tear or two, started by her own
words, came forth, and she looked at me softly.

“You would add to the favour of your invitation,” she said with a smile
which made me look at something else, “if you would include in it Miss
Kitty Fairthorn. Poor thing! She is put upon very sadly, and it would
be such a treat for her. They see so little of the beauties of nature
in London.”

“I am sure my Uncle will be most happy;” I answered as if I were not
sure about myself.



NOW my Uncle Cornelius Orchardson (a stout and calm fruit-grower,
called in contumely “Corny the topper” by strangers who wanted his
growth for nothing) professed and even practised a large contempt for
gossip. Nevertheless it was plain enough that his feelings were hurt,
if a thing went on, which he was bound in politeness to know, and yet
was not offered any tidings of it. With such people it is always wiser,
if you have done anything against their wishes, to let them know all
the particulars at once; and so to have it out and be done with it. And
I was beginning to love him now, which as a boy I had done but little,
inasmuch as he never gave way to me. Obstinate as he was, and sometimes
hot—if one tried to play tricks with him—I was not much afraid of Uncle
Corny, although so dependent upon him. For I knew him to be a just man
in the main, and one who kept no magnet of his own to fetch down the
balance to his own desires. Yea, rather he would set the beam against
himself, when it trembled in doubt of its duty.

With the hasty conclusions of youth, I believed that because he was now
an old bachelor, though able to afford a wife many years ago, he had
taken and held to an adverse view of the fairer and better half of the
human race. And his frequent counsels to me to keep out of their way
confirmed my conviction. The course of time proved that I was wrong in
this, as in many other matters of my judgment; and my rule, if I had to
begin again, would be to think the best of every man, till he compels
me otherwise. But the worst of Uncle Corny was that he never cared to
vindicate himself.

His countenance also was in keeping with this manner, and the build of
his body and the habit of his gait. His figure was tall, yet wide and
thick, and his face very solid and ample. He had never been comely by
line and rule, yet always very pleasant for an honest man to look at,
and likely to win the good word of a woman. Because there was strength
and decision in his face, and a power of giving full meaning to his
words, which were generally short and to the purpose. And especially he
was gifted with a very solid nose, not of any Roman or Grecian cast,
but broadly English, and expansive, and expressive, and sometimes even
waggish when he told an ancient tale.

Knowing that he would be quite sure to hear of my adventures soon, even
if he had not heard already—for Sunbury is a fine place for talk—and
trusting to his better feelings (which were always uppermost after
a solid supper, when he stirred his glass of hot rum and water, and
had his long pipe lit for him), I began upon him that very night with
what my mind was full of. For Tabby Tapscott was now gone home, after
looking at me rather queerly.

“What a knowledge of the world you have, Uncle Corny!” I exclaimed at
the end of his favourite tale concerning Covent Garden; “your advice
must be worth more than the counsel of the cleverest lawyer in London.”

“More honest at least, and no fee to pay,” he answered rather testily,
for he hated all humbug and compliments. “What have you been at, young
man? Is it my advice, or my aid, you want?”

“A little of both; or a lot of one, and a little of the other. I
have made the acquaintance of a sweet young lady, the gentlest,
and loveliest, and most graceful, and modest, and elegant, and
accomplished, and lofty-minded, and noble-hearted, and—and—”

“Angelic, angelic is the word, Kit—don’t begrudge it; it saves such a
lot of the others.”

“Yes, angelic,” I replied with firmness; “and even that is not half
good enough. You know nothing of such matters, Uncle Corny.”

“Then what is the use of my advice? You had better go to Tabby

This threw me out a little; but I would not be brow-beaten.

“If you have no wish to hear any more about her, and compare her to
an old creature like Tabby, all I can say is that I am sorry for your
taste, very sorry for your taste, Uncle Corny.”

“Well, well, go on, Kit. Let us have it all, while we are about it.
Rasp the baker told me something. He has brought down a girl from
London who can make short bread and maids of honour. No wonder you fell
in love with her.”

“You may try to provoke me, but you shall not succeed; because you
know no better. What will you say when I tell you the young lady is the
niece of Miss Coldpepper of Coldpepper Manor?”

I looked at Uncle Corny with a glance of triumph; and then stood up, to
breathe again, after my own audacity. But instead of being terrified,
he took it very coolly.

“Well, a cat may look at a king,” said he, pursuing his pipe with his
usual discretion; “and I suppose you have only looked at her; though
somebody said you pulled her out of our watercress brook.”

“Sir, I have had two delightful talks with her; and I mean to have
another to-morrow. Not that I have any hope—of course, I am well aware—”

“That you are unworthy to worship her shoe-string, and lie down for her
peg-heels to tread on. If she likes you, I don’t see why you shouldn’t
have her. By-and-by, I mean, when you get a little wiser. But has the
girl got any money?”

“I hope not; I hope not, from the bottom of my heart. It would be yet
another obstacle. She is as high above me, as the heaven is above the
earth, without—without even a penny in her pockets.”

“Flies all the higher, because her pockets are so light.” He spoke with
a jocosity, which appeared to me most vulgar. “Don’t look as if you
longed to knock me over, Kit. By the way, I heard that you had floored
Sam Henderson. If so, you deserve the best maid that ever looked into
a looking-glass. What do you want me to do, my lad? I know a little of
those people.”

I wondered what people he meant, but feared to ask him for the moment,
lest I might lose the chance of getting the favour I had set my heart
on. “It is a very simple thing,” I said, “and need not take your time
up. Mrs. Marker is longing to see your garden; and if she may come
to-morrow afternoon, she will bring the young lady, and I can show them
round. You need not stir a step, or even turn your head.”

“It is quite enough to have one head turned. They may come, if they
choose, but they must not bother me. Hand me the jar of tobacco, Kit,
and be off to the books, instead of spooning.”

My uncle might easily have taken a more ample and cordial view of
the question; still I was pleased not to find him worse, and ordered
our crock-boy on the Tuesday morning to fetch a little round while
he ate his breakfast, and leave a note for Mrs Marker at the lodge
of the Coldpepper grounds, near the dairy, which the housekeeper
visited early. And then I went to gather, and basket a quarter of
Keswick codlin and Quarantines. This occupied all the forenoon, and
what with seeing that they were picked aright, and sorted into firsts
and seconds, and fairly packed, with no rubbish at the bottom, into
bushel-baskets, and yet presented smiling with their eyes upward to
meet the gaze of the purchaser, the day went so fast that it was
dinner-time, before I could sit down, and dwell upon my heart. Then at
a reproachful glance from Selsey Bill, our orchard foreman, who had
heard the church clock strike one, and felt it to the depths of his
capable stomach, I set three fingers to my teeth, and blew the signal,
which is so welcome to the men who have lived upon nothing but hope,
ever since half-past eight o’clock.

It is not to be denied, however, that I had taken pretty sharp
advantage of being well mounted from time to time on the upper rungs
of a ladder, which gave me command of the Halliford Road—the higher
road, I mean, for the lower now was stopped and except to carts and
carriages—in such a manner that none could come from that part of the
world, without my knowledge. Seeing only a pedlar and some few women
(highly interesting to themselves no doubt, but not concerning my state
of mind), I went in to dine with Uncle Corny, and took care to eat none
of his onions.

“What cheeks you have got, Kit!” he cried with a laugh; “and it is
not from eating too much dinner. You have stolen the colour of my
Quarantines. Eat, boy, eat; or how will you pull through it? No more
visits from young ladies, if you are to go off your head like this.
You have put the new mustard-spoon into the salt. A pretty muddle, I’m
afraid, among my apples.”

Being always very dutiful, I let him have his grumble; and presently he
lit his pipe, and made off for the packing-shed, though the load was
not going till to-morrow night. Then I put myself into a little better
trim, feeling that the best I did could never make me fit to look round
the corner of a wall at somebody. Although I was considered in our
village a smart and tidy and well-built young fellow, and one of the
girls at the linendraper’s had sent me a Valentine last spring, said to
be of her own composition, beginning—“Thou noble and majestic youth,
Thy curls and thy ruddy cheeks proclaim the truth, That whenever I
think of thee, I have a sigh, And if thou provest false, I shall jump
into the Thames and die!” But it was in vain for me to think of this at
present; it gave me no support at all worth having; and even a book of
poetry, which I put into my pocket, might just as well have been the
list of pots and pans from Turnham Green.

Before I could get into any real courage, there came a gentle double
knock, as if from the handle of a parasol, at the green door near the
corner of the wall, and then a little laugh; and then a sweet voice
said, “Oh, Jenny, don’t you think we had better go back? Are you sure
that Auntie said that I might come?” In dread of further doubts, I ran
up promptly, and opened the door, and brought them in, and locked it.

“This young lady,” began Mrs. Marker, as if they were come for
her sake only, “has never seen any fruit-garden, fruit-orchard,
fruit-establishment, or whatever the proper name is. And I thought
perhaps before she goes back to London, this would enlarge her store
of knowledge; and her father, who is a very learned man, might like
to hear her account of it. Now keep your eyes open, Miss Kitty, and
see all. You would fancy that she noticed nothing, Mr. Orchardson, by
the way she goes on, and her quietness. And yet when you come to talk
afterwards, it turns out that nothing has escaped her blue eyes; and
she can tell ten times as much as I can, and I am considered pretty
accurate too. But we must pay our respects to your Uncle, Mr. Cornelius
Orchardson. I always like to do the proper thing. Business first, and
pleasure afterwards.”

“He will smile, when he hears how you have put it. He is very busy now
at the packing-shed. But he told me to take you wherever you liked; and
he will come down, when he has made out his list. On the left you have
the peach-wall, and on the right the plums; and the figs are getting
very ripe down this alley. We very seldom eat much fruit ourselves,
because we have such a lot of it. But we always long to get ladies’
opinions, because of the delicacy of their taste.”

“It is a perfect shame,” said Mrs. Marker, while making up her mind
what to begin with, “that, in such a Paradise, there should be no
lady, to give you the knowledge of good and evil. I brought a silver
knife with me, in case of being tempted. Not that I mean to taste
anything of course, unless my opinion should be absolutely required.
My constitution is not strong, Mr. Kit; and I am compelled to be very

I knew what was meant by that, having heard it often. “You shall have
nothing, madam, but the very best,” I answered; “for we never throw
away an opportunity like this. What shall we offer first for your

“Kitty, what do you say?” She turned as if in doubt. “You know, my
dear, how careful we must be. This young lady, Mr. Kit, allows me to
call her ‘Kitty,’ in our private moments. Kit and Kitty—what a very
strange coincidence!”

I could not help looking at the beautiful Miss Fairthorn; and to my
eyes she became more beautiful than ever. For a deep blush spread upon
her lovely cheeks, and she turned away, and said, “I leave it quite to

If Mrs. Marker had been planning all the morning how to get the best
of the tasting to herself, and to render her judgment supreme, she
could hardly have hit upon a better device than this. For her young
companion became so nervous and so much confused, and I myself so
diffident and deeply occupied, that our only object was to fill the
lady housekeeper’s mouth, and keep it running over with nothing worse
than fruit. Now and then I ventured to steal a glance at the one with
whom my heart was filled, as if to ask whether she would ever forgive
me for my sad name of Kit. But her eyes were afraid to encounter mine;
or if by any chance they did so, the light that was in them wavered
like a timid gleam pursued by cloud. To relieve this trouble, I began
to chatter vague nonsense to the other visitor, who was falling to in

“Everything is out of time this year, and nothing up to character.
There has been no sunshine on this wall, until you ladies shone upon
it; and what amazes me most is to find that anything has any colour
at all. Here is a Grosse Mignonne now, a week ago as green as a leek,
and covered now with downy crimson, except just where a leaf has made
a pale curve across it, like the pressure of a finger on your cheek.
Taste it, Mrs. Marker; you are not getting on at all.”

“Let me see, that makes seven, I think. I shall have lost my taste
before we get among the gages. Thank you, I am sure. Oh, how lovely,
and delicious! Luscious perhaps is the better expression. There goes
ever so much more juice on my dress. I ought to have brought a bib, Mr.
Kit; and I will, if I ever come again. But would not you say it was
just the least thought woolly?” She had never heard of such a thing
before, but I had taught her, and she was growing critical. “Kitty
dear, you are tasting nothing. Don’t you consider that just an atom

“Very likely it is. I don’t know enough to say. But I never remember
tasting wool, with so fine a flavour in it.”

Perhaps I was not in a proper mood to judge; but verily this appeared
to me to show an inborn aptitude for taking the management of the
fruit, and the government of the grower. To exaggerate is altogether
out of my nature, and I find it a great mistake to be ecstatic; but in
spite of all that, I would have given every sixpence allowed me by my
Uncle Corny—who was always afraid of allowing me too much—if only I
could have conveyed to this exquisite judge my opinion of her sentence.
But that blessed discovery of Mrs. Marker’s about the everlasting
fitness of our names,—upon which I had been dwelling in my heart, long
before her stupid slowness blurted it—this, I say, had acted in a very
awkward manner upon a mind infinitely higher than hers; and yet I hoped
humbly that it might suggest something, which might be for the best, if
let alone.

Things being so, it was not at all amiss that a loud voice reached us
from the clipped yew-hedge, which was set across to break the north
winds here—“Kit, where the deuce are you gone mooning? I thought you
would have come up with the ladies, long ago.”

“Here we are, looking from a distance at your peaches. Oh, Mr.
Orchardson, how lovely they do seem!” Mrs. Marker lost her dignity by
giving me a wink, believing as she did—and many others thought the
same—that I was next to nobody in these gardens, and my Uncle a tiger
over every fruit he grew.

“We have had as many peaches as we can eat, sir,” I said, without any
wish to contradict her, but simply to show the position I held.

“Ladies will excuse my present plight;” he had no coat on, and his
sleeves were tucked up, showing a pair of thick brown arms. “My peaches
are very poor this year, and many have split their stones, and rot
instead of ripening. We have not had such a season since 1852. I hope
you will not judge us by the wretched things you see. But come on a
little further, and try something else. All fruit is water, such a year
as we have had. But possibly I may find a plum or two worth eating.”

“Allow me the pleasure, sir,” said Mrs. Marker, who always insisted on
proper forms, “of introducing you to Miss Fairthorn, the only daughter
of Captain, or as he now is considered, Professor Fairthorn—a gentleman
of the highest scientific tendencies.”

“To be sure,” said Uncle Corny, as he took his hat off, and smiled with
surprise at her beauty; “I knew Captain Fairthorn, years ago, and a
very noble man he is. I have very good cause to remember him—but I will
not trouble you with that now. Mrs. Marker, if you would just turn this
corner—take care of your most becoming bonnet, young lady”—this pleased
the good housekeeper more than twenty plums,—“our trees are not as
sensitive as we are.”

His urbanity amazed me, for I never could have thought a good man
could be so inconsistent; and I said to myself that after all there
is something irresistible in women. So I ventured to sidle up to Miss
Fairthorn, as he led the way with his convoy, and asked her what she
thought of him.

“Oh, I think he is so nice,” she replied smiling at me, as if she was
pleased with my question; “so upright, and manly, and such a fine
countenance. No wonder, I’m sure, that his fruit is good.”

“Did you notice how much he was surprised at you, at your very pretty
dress, and exceedingly sweet smile, and most ladylike appearance, and
silvery voice, and lovely—lovely way of holding your parasol?”

“How can you talk such nonsense, Mr. Orchardson? And your Uncle appears
such a sensible man! Dear me, we are losing all the wise things he can
say. Let us hurry on—it was this way, I think.”

“No, no! Don’t you hear their voices down this path? Not twenty yards
off, if it were not for these trees. Oh, do let me carry your parasol.
You will want both hands to get along. Before you know where we are, we
shall be in the broad road. Oh, I am so sorry—it was all my fault. You
must let me undo the mischief I have done. May I show you how well I
understand all roses?”

By good luck, combined with some little skill of mine, her simple yet
wholly adorable frock was captured in three places by gooseberries
whom I envied. I expected great delight from this. But she showed at
once the sweetness of her temper, and her height above me. Instead of
blushing stupidly, she smiled, and said—“Thank you, I will do it for
myself. You can hardly be expected to understand such things.”



THERE are very few things that have the power to please us both in
heart and mind, even when they have the will to do it, which is very
seldom. Great events in our lives flash by without a word, and scarcely
seem to give us time to chuckle, or to sob, till afterwards. But the
little turns of time are more indulgent, and pass us with a sauntering
foot, more often dull than lightsome.

For the moment, I was glad to find that my Uncle Cornelius, in his
plain way, had taken a liking to my love. But I gave him little credit
for it, inasmuch as it seemed impossible to me that he could do
otherwise. Such was my petty jealousy that I did not even want to hear
him praise her, except in my own words. But he, in his solid way, would
take his own view of her character—as if he knew anything about it!

“I don’t care a farthing about all that,” I cried, when he had spoken
of some things, which tell the longest.

“I can see she is very quiet, and full of home affections,” he
persisted, as if I were a boy at school, and he were holding the
spelling book; “she is not extravagant, nor fond of waste; that I
saw by the way she went through a ‘Huling’s Superb,’ with a hole in
it. I could scarcely have done it any better myself. And she was
really grieved, which the lady-housekeeper had not the sense to be,
by the freedom—she called it recklessness—with which I picked those
Jeffersons, to find one in tip-top condition. And then when I offered
to make some tea, the housekeeper who had been stuffing for hours only
asked if the water was boiling. But your sweetheart began to buckle up,
and asked who could touch tea, after such delicious things.”

“Buckle up, indeed! Uncle Corny, you are outrageous. She had got
no such thing as a buckle near her. Her waist is done round with a
narrow blue ribbon, the colour of the sky, as her eyes are. And I will
thank you not to call her my sweetheart, if you please. I shall never
have such luck. And it sounds so common. There ought to be a better
expression for it. And such things are not made to be talked of.”

“Very well! You won’t hear me say another word. It will all come to
nothing; that’s one comfort. She goes back to London on Friday; and
you will very soon console yourself with Rasp’s young woman. I am told
that she has fine black eyes; and I am not sure that black don’t beat
blue ones, after all.”

This was so disgusting that I went away, and worked till dusk at a
heavy piece of trenching; and when it was dusk I lay in wait for three
felonious boys who came from Hampton, almost every evening, prowling
for our apples. I caught all three, and trounced them well—which is the
only proper plan—and the sound of their wailings, as they went home,
restored my faith in justice. For I had given them their choice—“a
licking or a summons”—and they said very justly, “Oh, a licking, if
you please, sir.” The world has now come to such a pass, that a father
would summon me for assault, if I so discharged his duty for him; but
thirty years ago a bit of common sense survived.

But in spite of that little satisfaction, I could not get much sleep
that night, for rolling, and pondering, and twisting in and out, the
tangle and the burden of a troubled mind. Turn it as I might, there was
no opening through it for another view of that perfect creature, with
whom my whole life seemed to flow. Terrible, terrible was the truth
that she would leave us all on Friday, and be swallowed up and no more
seen, in that great earthquake, London. A thousand wild ideas, and
schemes, for stealing yet one more interview, and countless crazy hopes
that she herself might try to compass it, all came thrilling through
my restless brain, but not one would stop there. None had any shape
or substance, such as could be worked upon, and brought to likelihood
of success. This was Tuesday night; last Saturday night how different
everything had been! Then I had only cared to know, that things in the
ground were doing well, that all the fruit which required gathering got
its due, and looked its best on its way to be devoured, that every man
pocketed his wages in good time to spend them, and that there was a
little hope of the weather taking up at last. Now there had been three
days without rain, and with touch of autumnal sunshine; heaven began
to look bright again, and the earth (which, like the dwellers therein,
lives only aright in view of it) was beginning to lift her sodden
crust, and fetch once more her storm-trampled breath and issue anew the
genial green in the midrib of mouldy foliage. In a word, the summer
which had failed the year, for want of a smile to lead it, was breaking
out at this last moment, better late than never.

Possessed as I was with my own troubles, and only a flickering
sunshine, I could not resist the contagious lightness of cheerful faces
all around. The workmen, who do (in spite of all British reserve,
and manly selfishness) take a deep interest in their employer’s
welfare, and stand up for him bravely, when any one abuses him,
except themselves—every man of them laid heel to spade, or hoisted
ladder on shoulder, with new briskness; because they could say to one
another—“The old buffer, who carries on this place, has fought against
long odds like a man; and now things look as if they was taking a
little turn in his favour.”

On the Wednesday morning glum however was my mind, and grim my face,
and Uncle Corny made some jokes, which may have seemed very good to
him. Our breakfast things were set as usual, and our breakfast cooked
and served by Mrs. Tabby Tapscott, that sage widow from the village,
whom we were often pleased to laugh at for her Devonshire dialect.
Also for her firm conviction, that nothing in these outlandish parts,
and none of our biggest men, were fit to compare with the products of
the West. There was one point however on which we gladly confessed the
truth that was in her—she could fry potatoes, not leathery chips, nor
the cake of pulpy fatness, but the crisp yet melting patin of brown
gold, so as none of the East may fry them. She turned them out of the
frying-pan upon a willow-pattern plate, and the man deserved to wear
the willow, who could think of weeping near them.

Now this good woman, who was a “cure,” as the slang boys of our village
said, took (though I knew it not as yet) a tender interest in my
affairs. For the last day or two, I had observed that she glanced at me
rather strangely, and once or twice behind my Uncle’s back, she had put
her finger on her lips, and then jerked her thumb over her shoulder, as
if to say—“Come and have a quiet word with me.”

But my frame of mind had appeared to me too noble and exalted to be
shared with her, until it was come to such a pitch that any aid would
be welcome.

This morning, as half of her fine work remained on my plate neglected,
she could no longer contain herself, but pinched my sleeve and
whispered, while my Uncle was going to the window, “Come out in
gearden, I want to spake to ’e.”

“Speak away,” I answered, “there is nothing to stop you, Mrs.
Tapscott;” but she looked at me and muttered that I was just a fool,
and she had a mind to have nought to do with me.

By the common law of nature, this made me long to hear what on earth
she could have to say, and I gave her the chance, while she washed up
the things, to see where I was, and to come out if she pleased. She
might do exactly as she pleased, for I did not intend to encourage her.
She came out, and began without asking me.

“I can’t abide to zee ’e look so crule weist and peaky. The toorn of
your nose bain’t the zame as her was, and you don’t zim at home with
your vittels, Measter Kit. Lor’ bless ’e, I been droo the zame my zen,
and I knaws arl about ’en.”

At first I was inclined to walk away; but it would have been shabby
to be rude to her, and a look of good-will and kindly pity was in her
hard-worn eyes and face. “What can you have to say to me?” I asked.

“You be young, and I be old,” she took my coat to stop me; “you be
peart and nimble, and I be a’most crippled with rheumatics and rumbago.
But the Lord hath made us arl alike, though He have given us different.
I knows as wull what ails ’e now, as if it arl coom droo my own heart.
And what you be zaying to yourzelf is—‘How be I to goo on with it’?”

This was a wonderfully accurate description of my present state of
mind. I looked at Mrs. Tapscott, with the admiration she deserved, and
said—“Well then, how be I to goo on with it?”

“I’ve athought ’un out,” she made answer bravely; “what you be bound
to do, Measter Kit, is never to let she goo back to Lunnon, wi’out
zettling zummat.”

Here was the whole of it in a nutshell. But how was I to settle

“Oh, Tabby, dear Tabby!” I cried, with some loss of dignity, but much
gain of truth; “how can I even get the chance of saying a word to her
again? This is Wednesday, and she goes back on Friday, and perhaps
she never comes again, and there are millions of people between us.
Everybody knows what Miss Coldpepper is, as proud as Punch, and as
stiff as starch. If I even dared to go near the house, she’d just tell
the gamekeeper to shoot me.”

“Wull, a young man as have vallen in love must take his chance of
shot-guns. But if so be you latts her goo awai wi’out so much as
anoother ward, you desarves to have no tongue in the head of ’e.”

“How easy it is to talk!” I replied, making ready to leave her, and
think by myself. “But how hard and impossible, Tabby, to find any
chance of doing anything. I must make up my mind not to see her any
more; but to think of her always, as long as I live.”

“Boddledicks!” cried Mrs. Tapscott, her favourite interjection of
contempt—what it meant we knew not, and probably not she. “Boddledicks,
where be the brains of they men? I could tull ’e what to do in half
a zecond, lad, to vetch old Coldpepper, and the young leddy too, and
every mortial ’ooman in thic there ouze, to hum eartr’e, the zame as if
they zighted ’e a burning to the muckpit, with all their Zunday vainery
under thee arm.”

I looked at Tabby Tapscott with some surprise; for she was giving
greater force to her description by using leg and arm as if she bore a
share in all of it. And the vigour of her countenance made me smile.
But the old woman laughed with a superior air. “Tak’th a bit o’ time,
for volks with slow brains to vollew my maind up—don’t her now? Goo up
to ’ouze, young man, and stale old Ragless.”

“Steal old Regulus!” I cried in great amazement, “why, what good on
earth would that do me? And if it would do any good, how am I to manage
it? I have not been brought up to that profession.”

“I zeed a man to Barrinarbor, vaive and vorty year agone, the most
wonnerful cliver chap, I ever zee. He coom a-coortin’ of me, the taime
as I wor ruckoned the purtiest maid in arl the parish of Westdown. But
I wadn’t have none of ’un, because a’ wor so tricksy. Howsomever I
didn’t zay ‘noo’ to wance, for a’ wor the most wonnerful chap I ever
zee. The Lord had been and given he every zort o’ counsel. A’ could
churm a harse out of any vield or linhay, a’ could mak’ the coos hurn
to ’un, when the calves was zuckin’, a’ could vetch any dog a’ took
a vancy to from atwane his owner’s legs or from’s own zupper. And
a’ zhowed me a trick or two I han’t vorgotten yet. I could tull ’e
purty smart how to vetch old Ragless, and kape ’un so long as you was

Now I might have paid little attention to this, and indeed had begun
to reject the suggestion of a stratagem far below the dignity of love,
till suddenly a queer dream came to my remembrance, a dream of last
Sunday night, the very night after that little adventure at the timber
bridge. In that enchanting vision, I had seen Miss Fairthorn smiling
as she came to me, through a lovely meadow enamelled with primrose,
and cowslip, and bluebell, herself of course the fairest of all the
flowers. And when I approached her, behold, she was led by this same
dog, old Regulus, who conducted her gracefully to my longing arms, by
means of the long gold chain which had reposed on the stately bosom
of Mrs. Jenny Marker. I am not superstitious—as everybody vows when
recounting his dreams—but still it did seem strange.

“Lave it arl to me,” Mrs. Tapscott went on, as she saw my hesitation.
“Nort for ’e to do, but to gie me a zhillin’, vor to buy the stuff, and
nobody no wiser. Then goo avore zunrise, and vetch old Ragless. Putt
’un in a barg, and keep ’un znug in thic there old root-ouze. My stars
and garters, what a bit o’ vun ’twill be!”



A GREAT observer of these latter days has advised us to abstain from
deep research into the origin of our own names. Otherwise we might
become convinced of a lamentable want of lofty tone among those,
without whom we could not have been here, to show our superiority. A
vein of fine thought is at once set flowing; but for “Ragless” it would
have flowed in vain, as dogs have no surname to dwell upon.

His case was a strange one, and not without interest. Nobody in our
parish had any knowledge of his ancestry, although he had won very high
repute by biting many people who got over it. Any other dog would have
become the victim of an injudicious outcry; but “Ragless,” by making
some other good bites, established his legal right to do it, and was
now considered a very wholesome dog, though he might have a temper of
his own. But even if he had, who was to blame?

Some seven, or it may have been eight years since, Miss Coldpepper was
“rolling in her carriage” down Feltham hill, when the coachman pulled
up very sharply, and just in time to save mishap. All the boys in the
village were let loose from school, and with one accord had found a
genial pastime, which they were pursuing with the vigour of our race.
They had got a poor dog, with no father, or mother, or even policeman
to defend him, and they had put him in a barrel near a garden-gate, and
tacked in the head so that no escape was left. This being done to their
entire satisfaction, what remained except to roll him down the hill?
And this they were doing with a lofty sense of pleasure, and shouts
that almost drowned the smothered howls from within, when the carriage
came upon them, and very nearly served them right. “Let them have the
whip,” cried the lady with due feeling, when the footman had jumped
down and reported all the facts; but the ring-leaders had vanished, and
the boys who tasted lash were some innocent little ones who had only
helped in shouting. “Hand him in to me,” was her next order; and the
poor trembling animal saw pity in her eyes, and gave her face a timid
lick, which made his fortune. No claimant being found for him, the lady
took him home, and aptly called him “Regulus,” which the servants very
promptly converted into “Ragless,” reasoning well that the Italian
greyhound wore a coat, but this dog had none, save the bristles
wherewith Nature had endowed him. In the course of time he superseded
every other dog, and probably every human being, in the affection of
Miss Coldpepper.

If the early portion of his life had been unhappy, fortune had now
made him ample amends, and he should have been in amity with all
mankind. But whether from remembrance of his youthful woes, or cynical
perception of our frailties and our frauds, Regulus never acquired that
sweetness, which we look for in dogs, so much more than in ourselves.
His standard of action was strict duty beyond doubt, but a duty
too strictly limited, and confined to two persons—himself, and his
mistress. With the rest of creation he was cheerfully at war, though
tolerably neutral towards the cook, when she could bid high enough for
his consideration. These things made him deeply respected.

In person however, he was not quite a dog to arouse any vast
enthusiasm. He belonged to the order of the wiry-coated terriers, if he
was a terrier at all; for in him all the elements were so duly mingled,
that Nature could only proclaim him a dog. The colour of ginger and
that of cinnamon were blended together in his outward dog; and he went
on three legs, quite as often as on four, as much from contempt of the
earth perhaps as from feelings of physical economy. There was nothing
base about him; he had fine teeth, and he showed them, but never made
insidious assault on anybody. When he meant to bite, he did it quickly,
and expressed his satisfaction afterwards.

To seduce such a sentry, was an enterprise worthy of him, who in sweet
love’s service, and dispensing its mournful melodies, enchanted the
son of Echidna. And it may have been this sense of difficulty, and a
sporting desire to conquer it, which led me to follow up the joke, and
try my hand at a job, which had beaten the deepest dog-stealers of
Seven Dials.

All day long, I hoped to get at least a glimpse, or if bad luck
would not allow that, to hear at any rate something of that young
lady, without whom my life must grow old and barren. For this was no
school-boy affair of the fancy, nor even a light skit of early manhood,
such as fifty young fellows have out of fifty-one, and go their way
quickly after some other girl. I had never been given to such fugitive
sport; I was now in the prime of my years almost, and though I might
have looked at maidens, and thought what pretty things they were, none
had ever touched my heart till now. And “touched” is by no means the
proper word to use; it should be said plainly, that all my heart was
occupied, and possessed to its deepest fibre by a being far better, and
sweeter, and nobler than its outer and bodily owner; and that this must
abide so to its very latest pulse; as you will truly find, if you care
to hear about it.

Not a word came to me about those things which destroyed all my
attention to any other; and the dusk had stopped work—which was my
only comfort—and I sat all alone that Wednesday evening trying to get
through a little bread and cheese, but glancing more often from our
old window at the gloomy rush of the river, which was still in high
flood though some little abated. Uncle Corny was gone, to try to get
some money from people who had thriven on his hard-won fruit, and Mrs.
Tabby Tapscott had left the house early, upon some business of her own.
The house-door was open, for we had not many rogues, till the railway
came some years afterwards; and the evening was of those that smell of
beehives, and cornstacks, and horses upon their way home. At last, when
I had made up my mind to be forgotten by every one, in came Tabby, as
bright as a bun.

“Oh fai, oh fai!” she cried; “whatever be ’e doing of? Atin’ no zupper,
and zittin’ as if ’e was mazed a’most. Look ’e zee what the Lord hath
zent ’e! I was vorced to go arl the way to Hampton for ’un, for year
of they long tongues to Zunbury. If this wun’t vetch Measter Ragless,
arl I can zay is her bain’t a dog. Putt ’un down in zellar, when I’ve
larned ’e how to use ’un.”

From beneath her shawl she produced a little box, which she opened in
triumph, and the room was filled at once with a very peculiar odour
quite unknown to me. It was pungent rather than pleasant, and it made
me sneeze as well as laugh.

“You be up there by vaive o’clock, when the daisies’ eyes be openin’,
and goo to the zide door I tould ’e of”—Mrs. Tapscott knew all the
household ways at Coldpepper Hall, through a niece of hers who was
kitchen-maid, “and vang this by the coord out o’ heelin’, wi’out
titchin’ of ’un with thy vingers, and drag ’un athort the grass and the
pilm to backzide o’ the zhrubbery, and then you step out o’ zight in a
lew cornder. Ould dog be put out at zix o’clock riglar, and ’tis liable
he’ll hurn straight to ’e. Then let ’un ate a hummick, and kitch ’un up
vittily, and pop ’un into barg, and carr ’un home here, and I’ll zhow
’e what to do with ’un. But mind as her don’t scammel ’e. Her be turble

She gave me many other minute directions, and made me laugh so that
my spirits rose, with the hope of an interesting little farce, to
relieve the more tragic surroundings. I undertook briskly to play my
part, looking on the matter as a harmless joke; though I came to think
in course of time that the cruel theft I suffered from might partly
be a just requital for this wicked robbery. And yet it was absurd and
senseless, to make such comparison.

Without disturbing Uncle Corny, who slept very heavily, I was up before
daylight on the Thursday morning, and set out with the box and bag on
my felonious enterprise. Coldpepper Hall, or Manor, as it was called
indifferently, stood back upon some rising ground at a distance from
the river, and was sheltered well by growth of trees. There was nothing
very grand about it, and it leaned on stucco more than stone; but there
was plenty of room both within and without, and any one getting inside
the doors might say to himself, with some comfort flowing into him—“I
am sure that I need never be in any hurry here.”

The sun meant to get up a little later on, when I jumped the palings
of this old demesne, at a place where of right there should have
been a footpath, but the owner of the Manor had stopped it long ago,
perceiving the superior claims of quietude. Nobody had cared to make a
fuss about it, but enough of ancestral right remained to justify me in
getting over. Every window of the house was still asleep, and I gazed
at it with humble reverence, not as the citadel of the Coldpeppers,
but as the shrine of my sacred love. Then I chose a place of ambush in
a nest of hollies, and approaching the sallyport of Regulus, drew a
slow trail from it across the dewy grass to my lurking-place, and there
waited calmly.

Sweet visions of love from the ivory gate now favoured me with their
attendance, partly perhaps because love had not allowed me to sleep
out my sleep. Far as I am from any claim to the merits of a classical
education, I had been for some years, off and on, as a day boy at
Hampton Grammar-school, and could do a bit of Virgil pretty well,
and an ode or two of Horace. Whenever Uncle Corny came across a
Latin name he would call for me; and take it altogether, I had long
been considered the most learned young man in Sunbury. Even now I
remembered, though most of it was gone, the story of the Nymph who
placed her son in ambuscade for Proteus, and the noble description of
Regulus on parole, waving off the last kiss of his wife and babes.
Grimly he set his manly visage on the ground; and my Regulus was doing
the very same thing now.

Fat Charles had opened the door with a yawn, and sent forth that animal
of Roman type, to snuff the morning air, and perform his toilet, and
pay his orisons in general. Luxurious days had told their tale; it was
too plain that Capua had corrupted Sabine simplicity. Regulus moved
with a listless air, his desire to find whom he might bite lay dormant,
and no sense of iniquity pricked his ears, or lifted the balance of
his tail. “Let the world wag,” was the expression of his eyes, “I get
whatever I want in it, and would wag to it also, if I were not too
fat.” It appeared too certain that if I meant to catch him, I should
have to go and bag him where he stood.

But suddenly down went his nose, and his bristles flew up, and every
line of his system grew stiff as wire. He had lit on my trail near a
narrow flower-border, and it presented itself with a double aspect.
Was it the ever-fresh memory of a cat—not a cat of every-day life of
course, but a civet-cat, a musk-cat, a cat of poetic, or even fabulous
perfume? Or was it the long-drawn sweetness of a new ambrosial food,
heaven-sent to tempt his once lively, but now vainly wept-for appetite?
Whatever it might be, the line of duty was marked, and beyond evasion.

Those of our race who have made a study of dogs, for the sake of
example, declare that the best and most noble of them follow quest with
their noses well up in the air. Regulus failed in this test of merit;
he spread his nostrils affably within an inch of where the worms lay,
pricked his hairy ears, which were of divers colours, and with the
stump of his tail as the loftiest point of his person, ran a bee-line
towards me. In accordance with his fame, I made ready for a bite; but
to my surprise he paused, when he came point-blank upon me, and seemed
taken aback, as with some wholly new emotion. Regardful of the teaching
of my Nymph, I offered him a portion of the magic sop, and while he was
intent upon it slipped a stout potato-sack over his head, tumbled him
in with a push in the rear, and shouldered him.

Taking the path across the fields, I got home without meeting any one,
and found Tabby waiting for me near the root-house, which was simply
the trunk of a grand old oak, with a slab of elm fitted as a door to
it. No one was likely to visit this old storehouse at the present time
of year, and the loudest wailing of the largest dog might be carried on
in the strictest privacy. But I meant him to be happy there, and so he
was—to some extent.

For he seemed to resign himself, as if recalling his early adventure
in the barrel, and regarded his later prosperity as a dream; and
probably the charm of the drug he had swallowed acted benignly upon his
nerves. At any rate he allowed himself to be secured by a chain and a
fold-pitcher, and even licked my hand instead of snarling and showing
his teeth. Every arrangement was made for his comfort, and he lay down
as happy as a lotus-eater.

After breakfast, I took a little turn in the village, and there had
the pleasure of seeing fat Charles, the Coldpepper footman, nearly
trying to run, and looking sadly out of breath. He carried a leading
strap, with no dog to it, and under his arm was a bundle of papers.
As I approached him with kind inquiries, he drew forth his roll and
requested me to read, while he was recovering his breath a little. My
face must have turned as red as his—for this was the first theft I ever
committed, except of some apples from a rival grower, a curmudgeon who
would not tell us what they were—and I felt very queer as I read the
following, written in round hand and with many capitals.

“Reward of one guinea!—Lost, stolen, or strayed, a large brindled
terrier, known as ‘Regulus,’ the property of Miss Coldpepper of
Coldpepper Manor. He is very hard of hearing, and a little fond of
snapping. Any person bringing him home will receive the above reward,
and no questions asked. Any one detaining him will be prosecuted, with
the utmost rigour of the law.”

Charles had a score perhaps of these placards, written in sundry hands,
and spelt in divers manners, as if all the household had been set to

“Oh, Mr. Kit,” he cried, for every one called me that; “there is the
devil to pay, up to the ’All, and no mistake! And all of it blamed on
me, as innocent as the babe unborn, and more so, for only obeying of my
horders. What did I do, but just turn the brute out—for a brute he is
and no mistake, though wholesome in his bite, because it is his nature
to; and no one round these parts would be tough enough in the legs to
come forrard with a view of making off with him—then I shut the door
to, for his quarter hour airing, as laid down in written horders issued
every night. And my hair stood on end when he never come back, the same
as his does, when he flies at you.”

“But surely, Charles, some of you must have some suspicion?” I asked,
with astonishment at my own vice, and wondering what I should come to,
though not far enough gone as yet to look at him; “why should the dog
go from such a good home?”

“Because he’ve had enough of it, or we of him at any rate. He ain’t
been stolen, sir; the dog have that knowledge of the world, that all
Seven Dials couldn’t lay a tack to him. And everybody knows what our
Missus is. A guinea! Who’d steal a dog for a guinea? Let alone a dog
who’ll make a pepper-caster of you. No, no, I always said Old Nick
would come for ’un, some blessed morning; and I’m jiggered if he
haven’t! But bless my soul, you mustn’t keep me loitering like this,
sir. Mother Cutthumb wouldn’t have one, to stick up in her dirty old
window, Lord knows why. Do’e take one, and stick on your Uncle’s wall;
or a couple if you will, that’s a dear young man. There’ll be thirty
more ready, by eleven o’clock.”

It occurred to me that some of them perhaps had been written by a
certain lovely warm hand, which had the most delicious way with it that
could ever be imagined of stealing in and out of muff or glove, and of
coming near another hand (as coarse as a crumpet) in a sort of way that
seemed to say—“Now wouldn’t you like to touch me?”

“Who on earth can have written all these?” I asked. “Mr. Charles, why
you must have done most of them yourself.”

“Never a blessed one; Lord save you, I’ve a’ been on my poor legs, all
the morning! Every maid that could fist a few was ordered in. But the
young leddy fisted them four at the bottom.”

Making due allowance for his miscreant coarseness, I slipped away the
lowest four, and two others; those two I stuck up on the outer face of
Uncle Corny’s red-brick wall; but the other four never were exhibited
to the public, nor even to myself, except as a very private view. And
every one of them belongs to me at the present moment. The footman
thanked me warmly for this lightening of his task, and hurried on
towards Rasp the baker, and the linendraper.

So far as my memory serves, Uncle Corny got very little work out of
me that day. I was up and down the village, till my conscience told
me that my behaviour might appear suspicious; and I even beheld the
great lady herself, driving as fast as her fat steeds could travel, to
get her placards displayed all around in the villages towards London.
Although she was not very popular, and the public seemed well pleased
with her distress, I felt more than half inclined to take her dear love
back, and release him at his own door after dark. But Tabby Tapscott
said, and she had a right to speak,—“Don’t ’e be a vule now, Measter
Kit. Carr’ the job droo, wanst ’a be about ’un.” And just before dark
I met Mrs. Marker, and somebody with her, who made my heart jump. They
had clearly been sent as a forlorn hope, to go the round of the shops
where the bills had been posted. I contrived to ask tenderly whether
the dog was found.

“Not he, and never will be,” replied the housekeeper. “There are so
many people who owe the cur a grudge. Why, he even flies at me, if I
dare to look at him. Miss Kitty, tell Mr. Kit what your opinion is.”

“I fear indeed that somebody must have shot him with an air-gun. I am
very fond of dogs, when they are at all good dogs; but very few could
praise poor Regulus, except—except as we praise mustard. And I heard of
a case very like it in London.”

Her voice was so silvery sweet, and she dropped it (as I thought) so
sadly at that last word, that I could not help saying, although I was
frightened at my own tone while I said it,—

“Surely you are not going back to-morrow? Do say that you are not going
to leave us all to-morrow.”

Before she could answer, the housekeeper said sharply—“She was to have
gone to-morrow, Mr. Orchardson. But now Miss Coldpepper has made up her
mind to send for Captain Fairthorn the first thing to-morrow, unless
she recovers the dog meanwhile. Not that he knows anything about dogs,
but he is so scientific that he is sure to find out something. Good
night, sir! Come, Kitty, how late we are!”

Is it needful to say that Regulus indued a tunic of oak that night?



THE character of Captain Fairthorn—better known to the public now as
Sir Humphrey Fairthorn, but he had not as yet conferred dignity upon
Knighthood—will be understood easily by those who have the knowledge
to understand it. But neither Uncle Corny, nor myself—although we were
getting very clever now at Sunbury—could manage at all to make him
out at first, though it must have been a great deal easier then, than
when we came to dwell upon him afterwards. All that he said was so
perfectly simple, and yet he was thinking of something else all the
time; and everything he did was done as if he let someone else do it
for him. I cannot make any one understand him, for the plainest of all
plain reasons—I could never be sure that I myself understood him. And
this was not at all because he meant to be a mystery to any one; for
that was the last thing he would desire, or even believe himself able
to be. The reason that kept him outside of our reason—so far as I can
comprehend it—was that he looked at no one of the many things to be
feared, to be desired, to be praised, or blamed, from the point of view
we were accustomed to.

I had thought that my Uncle Cornelius (though he was sharp enough
always, and sometimes too sharp, upon me and my doings) was upon the
whole the most deliberate and easy-going of mortals; but a mere glance
at Professor Fairthorn showed how vastly the breadth of mankind was
beyond me. To look at his face, without thinking about him, was enough
to compose any ordinary mind, and charm away any trivial worries; but
to listen to his voice, and observe him well, and meet his great eyes
thoughtfully, and to catch the tranquility of his smile, this was
sufficient to make one ashamed of paltry self-seeking and trumpery
cares, and to lead one for the moment into larger ways. And yet he was
not a man of lofty visions, poetic enthusiasm, or ardent faith in the
grandeur of humanity. I never heard him utter one eloquent sentence,
and I never saw him flush with any fervour of high purpose. He simply
seemed to do his work, because it was his nature, and to have no more
perception of his influence over others, than they had of the reason
why he owned it. So far as we could judge, he was never thinking of
himself; and that alone was quite enough to make him an enigma.

Now people may suppose, and very naturally too, that my warm admiration
of the daughter impelled me to take an over-lofty view of the father.
People would be quite wrong, however, for in that view I was not alone;
every one concurred, and even carried it still further; and certainly
there was no personal resemblance to set me on that special track.
Professor—or as I shall call him henceforth, because he preferred it,
Captain Fairthorn—was not of any striking comeliness. His face was very
broad, and his mouth too large, and his nose might be said almost to
want re-blocking, and other faults might have been found by folk who
desire to talk picturesquely. But even the hardest of mankind to please
(in everything but self-examination) would have found no need, and
small opportunity, for improvement in his eyes and forehead. I know my
own stupidity, or at least attempt to do so, when it is not altogether
too big; yet I dare to deny that it had anything to do with the charm I
fell under in this man’s presence. And this is more than proved by the
fact that Uncle Corny—as dry an old Grower as was ever frozen out—could
resist the large quietude of our visitor, even less than I could.

For the Captain had been sent for, sure enough, about a little business
so far below his thoughts. And when he came into our garden, to thank
us for all we had done towards discovery of the thief, and especially
to thank me for my valiant services to his daughter, it is no
exaggeration at all to say that I wished the earth would hide me from
his great grey eyes. Under their kindly and yet distant gaze, I felt
what a wretched little trickster I had been; and if he had looked at me
for another moment, I must have told him everything, for the sake of
his forgiveness. But he, unhappily for himself, if he could be unhappy
about little things, measured his fellow-men by his own nature, and
suspected nothing until it had been proved. And at that very moment, he
caught sight of something, which absorbed him in a scientific zeal we
could not follow.

“A young tree dead!” he exclaimed; “and with all its foliage hanging!
Three other young trees round it injured on the sides towards it. When
did you observe this? Had you that storm on Saturday?”

“Yes, sir, it did rain cats and dogs,” my Uncle answered after
thinking. “We said that it might break the long bad weather; and it
seems to have done it at last, thank the Lord. There was a lot of
lightning, but not so very nigh.”

“Then no trees were struck from above, not even that old oak, which
seems to have been struck some years ago? May I cross the border, and
examine that young tree? Thank you; have you ever known a case like
this before?”

They passed very dangerously near the old oak; and I trembled, as
that villain of a Regulus showed his base want of gratitude by a
long howl; but luckily neither of them heard it. I went to the door,
and threatened him with instant death, and then followed to hear
the discussion about the tree. “You have known it before,” Captain
Fairthorn was saying; “but not for some years, and if you remember
right, not when the storms were particularly near. I have heard of
several similar cases, but never had the fortune to see one till now.
You perceive that the life is entirely gone. The leaves are quite
black, but have a narrow yellow margin. Forgive me for troubling you,
Mr. Orchardson, but when did you notice this condition of the tree?”

“Well, sir, it kept on raining up till dark on Saturday; and I did not
chance to come by here on Sunday. But on Monday morning it was as you
see it now—gone off all of a heap, and no cause for it. As healthy a
young tree as you would wish to look at—a kind of pear we call Beurré
Diel. Dead as a door-nail, you can see. Kit, get a spade, and dig it up
for Professor.”

“Thank you, not yet. I was going home to-night, but this is a matter I
must examine carefully. That is to say, with your kind permission. We
use big words, Mr. Orchardson, that sound very learned; and we write
very positively from other people’s observation. But one case, that
we have seen with our own eyes, and searched into on the spot to the
utmost of our power, is worth fifty we have only read of. You will
think me very troublesome, I greatly fear; and of gardening matters I
know less than nothing. But you will oblige me more than I can say, if
you will let me come again, and try to learn some little. You know what
has killed this tree, I presume.”

“No, sir, I have not got any sense at all about it,” my Uncle answered
stoutly; “’Tis the will of the Lord, when a tree goes off; or if it is
the doing of any chap of mine, he goes off too, and there’s an end of
it. Something amiss with these roots, I take it.”

His boots were tipped with heavy iron, and he was starting for a good
kick at the dead young tree, when I ran between, and said, “Uncle, let
it stay just as it is, for a day or two. It can’t draw anything out of
the ground; and this gentleman would like to examine it, as it is.”

“Young gentleman, that is the very point.” Captain Fairthorn, as he
spoke, looked kindly at me; “if I could be permitted to have my own
way, I would have a little straw shaken round it to-night, as lightly
as may be, without any foot coming nearer than can be helped to it.
That will keep the surface as it is, from heavy rain, or any other
accident. Then if I may be indulged in my crotchets, I would bring my
daughter, who draws correctly, to make a careful sketch and colour
it. And after that is done, and I have used my treble lens at every
point of divergence, I would ask as a very great favour to be allowed
to open the ground myself, and trace the roots from their terminal
fibres upwards. I would not dare to ask all this for my own sake, Mr.
Orchardson; but because we may learn something from it of a thing as
yet little understood—what is called the terrestrial discharge. We get
more and more into big words, you see. You have known trees destroyed
in this way before. It only happens on certain strata.”

“It has happened here, sir, for generations,” said my Uncle, trying
hard to look scientific. “The thunderstorm blight is what we call it.
We call anything a blight, when the meaning is beyond us. Seems as if
some trees was subject to it. I never knew an apple-tree took this way.
But pear-trees have been so, times out of mind, though never none but
the younger ones. A few years agone, I can’t say how many, seventeen
young pear-trees were killed outright, ten in one part of the grounds,
and seven in another, and not a mark to be found on one of them. All as
dead as door-nails when we come to look at them. A blight, or a blast,
that’s what we call it. And there’s nothing to do but to plant another.”

“A truly British view of the question,” Captain Fairthorn answered
with his sweet smile, which threw me into a glow by its likeness to a
smile yet lovelier; “I wish I could tell you how I feel for the English
fruit-grower in his hard struggle with the climate, the dealers, and
the foreign competition. It is a hard fight always, much worse than the
farmers; and a season like this is like knocking a drowning man on the
head. And yet you are so brave that you never complain!”

The truth of these words, and the tone of good will, made a deep
impression upon both of us, especially upon my Uncle, who had to find
the money for everything.

“No, sir, we never complain,” he replied; “we stand up to the seasons
like our own trees, and we keep on hoping for a better time next year.
But there are very few that know our difficulties, and folk that can
scarcely tell a pear from an apple go about the country, spouting and
writing by the yard, concerning of our ignorance. Let them try it,
is all I say, let them try it, if they are fools enough. Why bless
my heart, there’s a fellow preaching now about sorting of apples, as
if we had not done it before he sucked his coral! But I won’t go on
maundering—time will show. Glad to see you, sir, at any time, and if
I should happen to be about the grounds, my nephew Kit will see to
everything you want. What time shall we see you to-morrow, sir?”

We were walking to the gate by this time, and Captain Fairthorn pulled
out his watch. I observed that he had a true sailor’s walk, and a
sailor’s manner of gazing round, and the swing of his arms was nautical.

“What a time I have kept you!” he exclaimed with simple wonder; “and I
have forgotten altogether my proper business. I was to have tried some
special means, for recovering the dog we were speaking of. Unless he
is heard of to-night, I shall have little time to spare to-morrow. I
am bound to do all I can for my good hostess. But to think that a dog,
and a dog of no benevolence—according to my daughter—should stand in
the way of this most interesting matter! However, I will do my best all
the morning, and try to be with you by eleven o’clock. If I cannot come
then, you will know what the cause is. But even for the best of dogs, I
must not drop the subject. Now I thank you most heartily. Good-night!”

“What a wonderful man!” was my Uncle’s reflection; “to know all about
trees, and thunderstorms, and dogs, and Covent Garden! And yet to let a
woman twist him round her thumb, and tread on his child, and turn his
pockets inside out! Come along, Kit, I am pretty nigh starved.”

And this wonderful man added yet another crown to his glory that very
same night, as I heard. For to him, and his wisdom, was set down the
credit of a joyful and extraordinary event.

A young man, slouching with a guilty conscience and a bag on his back,
might have been seen—if his bad luck had prevailed—approaching a fine
old mansion craftily, when the shadows stole over the moon, if there
was one. Then an accurate observer might have noticed a quadruped of
somewhat downcast mien issuing with much hesitation from a sack, and
apparently reluctant to quit his guardian, who had evidently won his
faithful heart. But receiving stern orders to make himself scarce, he
might next be seen gliding to a gloomy door, uplifting wistfully one
ancient paw scraping at the paint where it had been scraped before,
and then throwing his head back, and venting his long-pent emotions
in a howl of inexpressible sadness. The door was opened, the guardian
vanished with suspicious promptitude, lights were seen glancing in a
long range of windows, an outbreak of feminine voices moved the air,
and after a shrill and unnatural laugh, came a sound as of hugging, and
a cry of—“Run, for your life, for his liver, Jane!”



WHEN the butter that truly is butterine, and the “Cheddar” of the Great
Republic, are gracefully returned to our beloved grocer, with a feeble
prayer for amendment, what does he say? Why, the very same thing that
he said upon the last occasion—“Indeed! all our customers like it
extremely; it is the very thing we have had most praise for; and this
is the very first complaint.”

In like manner I received for answer (when I fain would have sent back
to that storekeeper Love a few of the sensations I had to pay for) that
everybody praised them, and considered them ennobling, and was only
eager once again to revel in their freshness. And to tell the truth,
when my own time came for looking calmly back at them, I became one of
the larger public, and would have bought them back at any price, as an
old man regards his first caning.

However I did not know that now, and could not stop to analyze my own
feelings, which might for the moment perhaps be described as deep
longings for a height never heard of. All the every-day cares, and
hide-bound pothers of the people round me, were as paltry pebbles below
my feet; and I longed to be alone, to think of one other presence, and
only one.

Uncle Corny, in his downright fashion, called me as mad as a March
hare; but I was simply sorry for him, and kept out of his way, and
tried to work. Tabby Tapscott became a plague, by poking common jokes
at me; and the family men on the premises seemed to have a grin among
themselves, when my back was turned. The only man I could bear to work
with, was the long one we called “Selsey Bill,” because he came from
that part of Sussex, and resembled that endless projection. He was
said to have seventeen lawful children—enough to keep any man silent.
Moreover he was beyond all doubt the ugliest man in the parish; which
may have added to my comfort in his mute society, as a proof of the
facility of wedlock. The sharp click of his iron heel on the treddle of
his spade, the gentle sigh that came sometimes, as he thought of how
little he would find for supper, and the slow turn of his distorted
eyes as he looked about for the wheelbarrow—all these by some deep law
of nature soothed my dreamy discontent.

But what was there fairly to grumble at? If I chose to cast my eyes
above me, and set my affections out of reach, reason could not be
expected to undo unreason. And hitherto, what luck had led me, what
good fortune fed me with the snatches of warm rapture! Even my own
wickedness had prospered, and never been found out. Surely the fates
were on my side, and the powers of the air encouraged me.

What a lovely morning it was now, for the fairest of beings to walk
abroad, and for me to be walking in the same direction! Although the
earth was sodden still, and the trees unripe with summer drip, and the
autumnal roses hung their sprays with leathery balls, instead of bloom;
yet the air was fresh, and the sky bright blue, and the grass as green
as in the May month; and many a plant, that is spent and withered after
a brilliant season, was opening its raiment to tempt the sun, and
budding into gems for him to polish. The spring, that had forgotten
tryst with earth this year, and been weeping for it ever since, was
come at last, if only for one tender glance through the russet locks of
autumn. Why should not man, who suffers with the distresses of the air
and earth, take heart again, and be cheerful with them; ay, and enjoy
his best condition—that of loving, and being loved?

There was enough to tempt the gloomiest, and most timid mortal, to make
his venture towards such bliss, when Kitty Fairthorn, blushing softly,
and glancing as brightly as the sunshine twinkles through a bower of
wild rose, came along to me alone, where I stood looking out for her
father. Although I had been thinking bravely all the things set down
above, not one of them kept faith, or helped me to the courage of their
reasoning. Instead of that, my heart fell low, and my eyes (which had
been full of hope) would scarcely dare to render to it the picture of
which it held so many, yet never could manage to hold enough. She saw
my plight, and was sorry for it, and frightened perhaps both of that
and herself.

“It is so unlucky,” she said, without looking any more than good
manners demanded at me; “last night I began to think that all was going
to be quite nice again; for that very peculiar dog, that my aunt is
so strongly attached to, just came back; as if he had only gone for a
little airing on his own account, and so as to have all the road to
himself. He was as fat as ever, but oh so gentle! And his reputation
is not quite that. Perhaps you have heard of him. He seems to be well

“I think I have heard of him. Why, of course it must be the dog that
was mentioned in the hand-bills! We had two of them upon our wall. Mrs.
Marker was speaking of him, when you passed on Thursday, only I could
not attend to _her_.”

“Then you ought to have done so,” she replied, as if without any idea
of my inner thought; “for there has been the greatest excitement about
it. But I suppose, inside these walls, and among these trees and lovely
flowers, you scarcely know what excitement is.”

“Don’t I, then? Oh, I wish I didn’t!” I replied with a deeply sad look
at her; “it is you, who are so much above all this, who can have no
idea what real—real—a sort of despair, I mean, is like. But I beg your
pardon; you mustn’t notice me.”

“How can I help being sorry for you?” she asked very softly, when our
eyes had met. “You have been so good to me, and saved my life. But of
course I have no right to ask what it is. And I know that the crops
are always failing. And now you have a dear little tree quite dead. My
father has sent me, to try to make a careful drawing of it, because it
was struck by some extraordinary lightning. And the worst of it is,
that he has been called away, and can hardly be back till the evening.
He has invented a new conductor, for ships of the Navy, that are to
have iron all over and under them, and therefore want protecting. He
had a letter from the Admiralty this morning.”

“Oh dear, what a pity! What a sad loss!” I replied. “I am afraid it
will take us so much longer, without having him here to direct us. And
I doubt if my Uncle Cornelius will be able to be with us, half the

“Oh that is just what I was to say!” her tone was demure, but her
glance quite bright; “on no account am I to interfere with the valuable
time of Mr. Orchardson. Indeed I shall not trouble any one. If I may
only be shown the poor tree, and then be allowed to fetch a chair, or
a stool, or even a hassock, and then be told where to find some clear
water, and perhaps be reminded when the time is one o’clock, I am sure
I shall do beautifully.”

“You are certain to do beautifully; there is no other way that you
could do. No one shall be allowed to disturb you; I should like to see
any one dare to come near you except—except—”

“Except Mrs. Tapscott. You see I have heard of her. And it is so kind
of you to think of her. Then I shall be quite happy.”

“Mrs Tapscott indeed! No, except me myself. I shall lock that
chattering woman in the back kitchen, or how could you ever do a
stroke? I am sure it will take you a very long time. There are three
other trees that you ought to draw, if you wish to show exactly what
the lightning did. I hardly see how you can finish to-day. If you
leave off at one o’clock, it will be utterly impossible. And my Uncle
Cornelius will be in such a rage, if you think of going back without
anything to eat.”

“How very kind everybody is down here! It is the very nicest place I
ever have been in. It will be so miserable to go away. I am not at all
accustomed to such kindness.” Her lovely eyes glistened as she began
to speak, and a tear was in each of them as she turned away. I felt as
if I could have cried myself, to see such an innocent angel so sad.
But I durst not ask any questions, and was bound to go on as if I knew

“What a little drawing-block you have!” I said; “you ought to have one
at least twice that size. Do let me lend you one. I have three or four;
and you can choose which you like of them. And my pencils too, and my
colour-box. There are none to be had in the village. If you will rest
a moment in this little harbour, I will get them all, and a chair for

It did not take me long to let Tabby Tapscott know, that if she dared
even to look out of the window, she would mourn for it all the rest of
her life; moreover that she must not let anybody know in what direction
I was gone, even if his Grace of C. G. himself came down, to grant
us the best stall he had for ever. Tabby winked with both eyes, and
inquired if I took her for a “vule, or a zany, or a coochey hosebird,”
and said she would have “zummut good for nummatin,” by one o’clock. And
as I hurried back to the bower, there came almost into my very hand
the loveliest _Souvenir d’un Ami_ rose that ever lifted glossy pink,
to show the richer glow within. This rose I cut with the tender touch
which a gardener uses boldly, and laid it on my drawing-block, so that
each exquisite tinge and fringe and curve of radiant leaflet, as well
as the swanlike bend of stalk and soft retirement of sepal, led up to
the crowning beauty of the bloom above them.

“I never saw anything to equal that,” said one who might outvie the
whole; “who can have taught you, Mr. Kit, such knowledge of what is

She had called me by my village-name; and more than that, she had let
me know that she looked upon me as a rustic. I saw my advantage, and
was deeply hurt, that she might make it up again.

“You are right,” I answered, turning back, as if in sad abasement;
“Miss Fairthorn, you are right indeed in supposing that I know nothing.
However, I am able to carry a chair, and to wait upon you humbly. Let
us go to the tree; and at one o’clock, I will venture to come, and tell
the time.”

“Oh, I never meant it at all like that! I could never have imagined you
would take me up so. I seem to say the wrong thing always, as I am told
every day at home. I hoped that it was not true; but now—now, I have
given offence to you, you, who have been so good to me. I could never
attempt to draw to-day. I will tell my father that I was rude to you,
and he will send somebody else to do it.” I felt that this would have
served me right; but I was not in love with justice.

“I implore you not to do that,” I said; “really that would be too
hard upon me. Why should you wish to be hard upon me? I am trying to
think what I have done to deserve it. You are worse than the ground

“Then I suppose I killed your trees. I am not going now to be silly any
more. Tell me what to do, to show that you have quite forgiven me. You
know that I never meant to vex you.” She looked at me so sweetly, that
I could only meet her eyes.

“I declare it will be one o’clock, before I have done a thing. What
will my father say? And I must be so careful. I am sure that you could
do it better, better much than I can. Will you do it, while I go and
look for Mr. Orchardson? I like him very much, and his fruit is so
delicious. No, you won’t relieve me? Well, shake hands, and be good
friends again. May I have this lovely rose, to give my father something
beautiful, when he comes back from London?”

I saw that she was talking fast, that my prudence might come back to
me. She knew as well from my long gaze, that I loved her, and must
always love her, as I to the bottom of my heart knew it. And she did
not seem offended at me, only blushed, and trembled, just as if some
important news were come (perhaps by telegraph), and she wondered while
she opened it.

For me this was enough, and more almost than I could hope for—to let
her keep this knowledge in her mind, and dwell upon it; until if happy
angels came—as they gladly would—to visit her, the sweetest of them all
might fan it, with his wings, into her heart.

“Halloa, Kit my lad!” cried Uncle Corny, when he came to dinner, and
my darling was gone with her sketch half done, and I had only dared
to hover near her. “Sweetheart been here, they tell me. What a leary
chap you are! When I heard Cap’en was gone to Town, I thought it was
all over. I’ve been wanting you up at packing-shed, for the last
three hours. No more good work left in you. That’s what come of sweet

“Uncle Corny, if you must be vulgar, because you have no proper sense
of things, the least you can do is not to holloa, as if you were
driving a truck of rags and bones.”

“Hoity, toity! Here’s a go! One would think there had been no courting
done, since Adam and Eve, till your time. Too hot to hold—that’s my
opinion. And as for rags and bones, young fellow, that’s just about
what it will come to. The girl won’t have sixpence, by what I hear;
though there’s lots of tin in the family. I know a deal more than you
do about them. Don’t pop the question without my leave.”

What a way to put it!



ALTHOUGH no token had passed between us, and no currency been set
up, of that universal interchange, which my Uncle and Tabby termed
“courting,” I felt a very large hope now, that the goods I had to
offer,—quiet as they were, and solid, without any spangle—were on
their way to be considered, and might be regarded kindly. For while I
knew how poor I was, in all the more graceful attributes, and little
gifted with showy powers of discourse, or the great world’s glitter,
void moreover of that noble cash which covers every other fault, yet
my self-respect and manhood told me that I was above contempt. Haughty
maidens might, according to their lights, look down on me; let them
do so, it would never hurt me; I desired no haughtiness. That which
had taken my heart, and led it, with no loss to its own value, was
sweetness, gentleness, loving-kindness, tender sense of woman’s nature,
and the joy of finding strength in man. For though I am not the one
to say it, I knew that I was no weakling, either in body, or in mind.
Slow of wit I had always been, and capable only of enjoying the greater
gifts of others; but as I plodded on through life, I found it more and
more the truth, that this is the better part to have. I enjoy my laugh
tenfold, because it is a thing I could never have made for myself.

But for a long time yet to come, there was not much laughter before
me. One of the many griefs of love is, that it stops the pores of
humour, and keeps a man clogged with earnestness. At the same time, he
becomes the Guy, and butt for all the old jokes that can be discharged
by clumsy fellows below contempt. None of these hit him, to any good
purpose, because he is ever so far above them; but even the smell of
their powder is nasty, as a whiff across his incense.

For eight and forty hours, it was my good fortune to believe myself
happy, and thereby to be so; though I went to church twice on Sunday,
without seeing any one except the parson, who was very pleasant. But
suddenly on Monday a few words were uttered; and I became no better
than a groan.

“Her be gan’,” were the words of Mrs. Tapscott.

“Tabby, what the Devil do you mean?” I asked, though not at all
accustomed to strong language.

“I tull ’e, her be gan’. Thee never zee her no more. Step-moother
’a been down, and vetched her.” Tabby herself looked fit to cry;
although there was a vile kind of triumph in her eyes, because she had
prophesied it.

“Do you mean to tell me,” I asked slowly, and as if I were preparing
to destroy her, “that Miss Fairthorn has been taken away, without even
saying ‘Good-bye’ to me?”

“Can’t tull nort about no Good-bais. Her maight ’a left ’un for ’e. Her
be gan to Lunnon town, and no mistake. Zeed the girt coach myzell, and
the maid a-crying in her.”

Without thinking properly what I was about, I clapped on a hat, and
laid hold of a big stick, and set forth upon the London road; not
the Hampton road which runs along the river, but the upper road from
Halliford, which takes a shorter course through Twickenham. Tabby ran
after me, shouting—“Be ’e mazed? If ’e could vlai, ’e could never
overget her. Be gan’ dree hour, or more, I tull ’e.”

But in spite of that fearful news, I strode on. And I might have
gone steadily on till I got to London—for there was the track of the
wheels quite plain, the wheels of Miss Coldpepper’s heavy carriage—if
I had not met our “Selsey Bill,” the Bill Tompkins whom I may have
mentioned. My Uncle had sent him to Twickenham, I think, to see about
some bushel-baskets; and he was swinging home with a dozen on his head,
which made his columnar height some fifteen feet; for he was six and
three quarters, without his hat.

In reply to my fervid inquiries, he proceeded, in a most leisurely yet
impressive manner, to explain that he had not met the carriage, because
it had passed him on his way to Twickenham, and might be expected back
by now; as Miss Coldpepper never allowed her horses to go beyond
Notting-Hill Gate, whence her guests must go on other wheels into
London. I took half of his baskets (for he was too long to be strong)
and so returned to my uncle’s gate with half a dozen “empties” on my
head, and a heart more empty than the whole of them.

This was almost a trifle compared to the grief that befell me later
on—which has left its mark on me till I die—for though cast down
terribly, I was not crushed, and no miserable doubts came to rend me in
twain. Though my darling was gone, I could tell where she was, or at
any rate could find out in a day or two. And it was clear that she had
been carried off against her will; otherwise how could our Tabby see
her crying? It is a shameful and cruel thing, and of the lowest depths
of selfishness, to rejoice at the tears of an angel; and I did my very
utmost to melt into softest sympathy. To be certain of the need for
this, I examined Mrs. Tapscott most carefully as to the evidence.

“I zeed ’un wi’ my own heyesight; girt big drops,” she said, “the zize
of any hazzlenits. Rackon, thee mouth be wattering, Master Kit, vor to
kiss ’un awai.”

This may have been true, but was not at all the proper way to express
it. The only thing wrong on my part was, that a lively thrill of
selfish hope ran down the veins of sympathy. She wept—she wept! Why
should she weep, except at having left behind her some one whom she
would most sadly miss? Could it be Miss Coldpepper? Happily that was
most unlikely, from the lady’s character. Mrs. Marker? No, I think
not—a very decent sort of woman, but not at all absorbing. Uncle Corny?
Out of the question. A highly excellent and upright man; but a hero of
nails, and shreds, and hammers, and green-baize aprons, and gooseberry
knives. Ah, but Uncle Corny has a nephew—

“Kit, I am sorry for you, my boy;” he came up to me, as I was thinking
thus, even before he went to his tobacco-jar; “you are hard hit, my
lad; I can see it in your face; and you shall have no more chaff from
me. Very few girls, such as they are now, deserve that any straight
and honest young chap, like you, should be down in the mouth about
them. But your mother did, Kit, your mother did. And I am not sure but
that this Miss Fairthorn does; though you can’t judge a girl by her
bonnet. But I am not going to be overcobbed like this. If you have set
your heart upon the girl, and she on you,—so be it, Amen! You shall be
joined together.”

My Uncle came up, as he spoke, and looked with friendly intentions at
me, and yet with a medical gaze and poise, which inclined me to be
indignant. “It takes two parties to make an agreement,” I said, neither
gratefully nor graciously.

“S’pose I don’t know that, after all the robberies taken out of me? But
I know what I say, and I tell you, that if your mind is set upon this
matter, you shall have it your own way. Only first of all, be sure that
you know your mind. Few people do, in this ‘age of invention’—as they
call it, without inventing much, except lies—if you are sure that you
know your mind, speak out, and have done with it.”

I stood up and looked at him, without a word. All my gratitude for his
good-will was lost in my wrath at his doubt of my steadfastness.

“Very well,” he said, “you need not stare, as if you were thunder and
lightning. When you think about it, you will see that I was right; for
this is no easy business, Kit, and not to be gone into, like a toss for
sixpence. I have spoiled you, ever since you were a child; because you
had no father, and no mother. You have had your own way wonderfully;
and that makes it difficult for you to know your mind.”

If that were the only obstacle, I ought to have the finest knowledge
of my mind; for the times had been very far asunder, when I had been
allowed to follow my own way. But I knew that Uncle Corny took the
other view, and he had this to bear him out, that he always managed
that my way should be his way. It was not the time to argue out that
question now; and one of my ways most sternly barred was that of going
counter to him in opinion. So I only muttered that he had been very
good to me.

“I have,” he continued; “and you are bound to feel it. Five shillings
a week you have been receiving, ever since you could be trusted to lay
in a tree; as well as your board and lodging, and your boots, and all
except tailoring. Very well, if you set up a wife, you will look back
with sorrow on these days of affluence. But to warn you is waste of
words, in your present frame. Only I wish you to hear both sides. I
have no time now; but if you like to come to me, when I have done up my
books, I will tell you a little story.”

This I promised very readily; not only to keep him on my side, but
because I saw that he knew much, not generally known in Sunbury, of
the family matters which concerned my love, and therefore myself, even
more than my own. And while he was busy with his books, which he kept
in a fashion known only to himself, I strolled down the village in
the feeble hope of picking up some tidings. It was pleasant to find,
without saying much, that our neighbours felt a very keen and kind
interest in our doings. There was scarcely a woman who was not ready to
tell me a great deal more than she knew; and certainly not one who did
not consider me badly treated. Miss Fairthorn, by her sweet appearance
and gentle manner, had made friends in every shop she entered; and the
story of her sudden and compulsory departure became so unsatisfactory,
that deep discredit befell our two policemen. But the only new point
I discovered, bearing at all upon my case, was gained from Widow
Cutthumb. This good lady was now in bitter feud with the house of
Coldpepper, although she made it clear that the loss of their custom
had nothing to do with it, being rather a benefit than otherwise.

She told me, with much dramatic force, some anecdotes of Miss Monica,
the younger daughter of Squire Nicholas, and a daughter by no means
dutiful. She had married, against her father’s wish, the Honourable
Tom Bulwrag, a gambler, and a drunkard, and, if reports were true,
a forger. As this appears in my Uncle’s tale, it need not have been
referred to, but to show that the lady’s early records were not fair
among us. After impressing upon me the stern necessity of silence,
as to these and other facts, Mrs. Cutthumb ended with a practical
exhortation, dependent upon the question whether I had a spark
of manhood in me. I replied that I hoped so, but as yet had few
opportunities for testing it.

“Then, Mr. Kit,” she proceeded, with her head thrown back and one fat
hand clenched, “there is only one thing for you to do—to run away with
the young lady. Don’t stop me, if you please, Master Kit; you have
no call to look as if I spoke treason. Better men than you has done
it; and better young ladies has had to bear it. It is what the Lord
has ordained, whenever He has made two innocent young people, and the
wicked hold counsel together against them. You go home, and dwell upon
it. Sure as I am talking to you now, you’ll be sorry till your dying
day, if you don’t behave a little spirity. Do you think I would ever
give such advice to a wild young man with no principles, to a fellow I
mean like Sam Henderson? But I know what you are well enough; and every
girl in Sunbury knows. ’Tis not for me to praise you to your face; but
you are that solid and thick-built, that a woman might trust you with
her only daughter. And that makes you slow to look into women. If I may
be so bold to ask, how do you take the meaning of it for that sweet
Miss Kitty to be fetched home so promiscuous?”

“Mrs. Cutthumb,” I answered, with a penetrating look, to show her that
she underrated me, “I fear it must be that some mischief-maker has
written up to say that I, that I—you know what I mean, Mrs. Cutthumb.”

“Yes, sir, and you means well so far, and everything straight-forrard;
but you ain’t got near the heart of it, Master Kit; nor your Uncle
neither, I’ll be bound. Wants a woman’s wits for that.”

“What on earth do you mean? It is bad enough. I don’t see how even a
woman can make it any worse than it is. Speak out what you mean, since
you have begun.”

“Well, sir, it is no more than this, and you mustn’t be put out by it.
Suppose there is another young gent in the case—a young gent in London,
they means her to marry.”

The goodnatured woman looked so knowing, that I thought she must have
solid proof; and perhaps the deed was done already. I tried to laugh,
but could only stare, and wonder what was coming next.

“Oh, Master Kit,” she went on with her apron to her eyes, or she was
kind of heart, “you used to come, and play down here, when your head
wasn’t up to the counter. And I had my Cutthumb then, and he gave you a
penny, because you was so natural. Don’t you be struck of a heap like
that, or I shall come to think that all women is wicked. It was only a
bad thought of my own. I have nothing to go by, if I were to die this
minute; and the same thought might come across any one. Don’t think no
more about it, there’s a dear young man. Only keep your eyes open, and
if you can manage to come across that stuck-up Jenny Marker, the least
she can do, after saving her life, is to tell you all she knows, and to
take your part. But don’t you believe more than half she says. I never
would say a single word against her, there’s no call for that, being
known as she is to every true woman in Sunbury; but if she’s not a
double-faced gossiping hussy, as fancies that a gold chain makes a lady
of her, and very likely no gold after all, why I should deserve to be
taken up, and there’s no one has ever said that of me.”

Here Mrs. Cutthumb began to cry, at the thought of being taken to the
station; and I saw that time alone could comfort her, yet ventured to
say a few earnest words, about her position and high character. And
presently she was quite brisk again.

“Why bless my heart,” she said, looking about for a box of matches on
the onion shelf; “I ought to have stuck up my candle in the window,
pretty well half an hour agone. Not that no customer comes after dark,
nor many by daylight for that matter. Ah, Master Kit, I am a poor
lone widow; but you are the nicest young man in Sunbury; and I wish
you well, with all my heart I do. And mind one thing, whatever you
do; if you ever carries out what I was saying, here’s the one as will
help you to it, in a humble way, and without much money. A nice front
drawing-room over the shop, bedroom, and chamber-suit to match. Only
twelve shillings a week for it all, and the use of the kitchen fire for
nothing. And the window on the landing looks on the river Thames, and
the boats, and the barges, and the fishermen. Oh, Mr. Kit, with Mrs.
Kitty now and then, it would be like the Garden of Eden.”



THAT last suggestion was most delicious, but it came too late to
relieve the pang of the horrible idea first presented. I could not help
wondering at my own slow wit, which ought to have told me that such a
treasure as my heart was set upon, must have been coveted long ere now,
by many with higher claims to it. Was it likely that I, a mere stupid
fellow, half a rustic, and of no position, birth or property, should
be preferred to the wealthy, accomplished, and brilliant men, who were
sure to be gathering round such a prize? Black depression overcame me;
even as the smoke of London, when the air is muggy, falls upon some
country village, wrapping in funereal gloom the church, the trees, the
cattle by the pond, and the man at the window with his newspaper. I
could not see my way to eat much supper, and my Uncle was crusty with

“Can’t stand this much more,” he said, as he finished the beer that was
meant for me; “a plague on all girls, and the muffs as well that go
spooning after them! Why, the Lord might just as well never have made
a Williams pear, or a cat’s-head codlin. S’pose you don’t even want to
hear my story; you don’t deserve it anyhow. Better put it off, till you
look brighter, for there isn’t much to laugh at in it, unless it is the
dunder-headed folly of a very clever man.”

However, I begged him to begin at once; for he had hinted that his tale
would throw some light on the subject most important in the world to
me; so I filled him five pipes that he might not hunt about, and made
his glass of rum and water rather strong, and put the black stool for
his legs to rest on, and drew the red curtains behind his head, for the
evening was chilly, and the fire cheerful.

“Like to do things for myself,” he muttered, while accepting these
little duties. “Nobody else ever does them right, though meaning it
naturally for the best. Well, you want to hear about those people; and
you shall hear all I know, my lad; though I don’t pretend to know half
of all; but what I know I do know, and don’t talk at random, like the
old women here. We’ll take them in branches—male and female—until they
unite, or pretend to do it; but a very poor splice; the same as you
see, if you send for Camelias to Portugal, a great clumsy stick-out
at the heel of the graft, and the bark grinning open all along. Bah!
There’s no gardeners like Englishmen, though we run ’em down for fear
of boasting. Did you ever hear why Professor Fairthorn would ever so
much rather be called ‘Captain,’ though ‘Professor’ sounds ever so much

“Perhaps he has a legal right to be called ‘Captain,’ but not to the
other title. I have heard that hundreds of people call themselves
Professors, without any right to do it. And I am sure he would never
like to be one of them.”

“That has got nothing to do with it. He has held some appointment that
gave him the right to the title, if he liked it. The reason is that his
wife always calls him ‘Professor’; and so it reminds him of her. Ah,
don’t you be in this outrageous hurry for a wife of your own, Master
Kit, I say. For all I know, the Captain may have been as wild for her,
some time, as you are for your Kitty. What can you say to that, my lad?”

“Why, simply that you don’t know at all what you are talking about,
Uncle Corny. My Miss Fairthorn is not that lady’s daughter, and is not
to be blamed for the whole of her sex, any more than you are for the
whole of yours.”

“There is something in that, when one comes to see it,” my Uncle
replied; for his mind was generally fair, when it cost him nothing.
“But you must not keep on breaking in like this, or you won’t have
heard half of it, this side of Christmas. Well, I was going to take
them according to their sexes, the same as the Lord made them. And
first comes the lady, as she hath a right to do, being at the bottom of
the mischief.

“When I was a young man, thirty year or more agone, there used to be a
lot of talk about the two handsome Miss Coldpeppers, of the Manor Hall
down here. There used to be a lot also of coaches running, not so much
through Sunbury, which lay to one side of the road, though some used to
pass here on their way to Chertsey; and there was tootle-tootle along
father’s walls, three or four times a day. But the most of them went
further back, along the Staines and Windsor road, where the noise was
something wonderful; and it’s my opinion that these Railway things will
never be able to compare with it. They may make as much noise for the
time, but it seems to be over, before the boys can holloa.

“Lots of young sparks, and bucks, and dandies, and Corinthians, and
I forget what else, but all much finer than you can see now, used to
come down by the coaches then, some of them driving, some blowing the
horn, some upon the roof like merry-Andrews, making fools of themselves
as we should call it now, and not be far wrong either. They were much
bigger men than I see now, in their size, and their way of going on,
and their spirits, and their strength of life, and likewise in their
language. And the manners of the time were as different as can be, more
frolicsome like, and more free and jovial; and they talked about the
ladies, and to them also, ten times as much as they do now; and things
were altogether merrier for them that had the money, and no worse for
them that hadn’t got it, so far as I can see. Ah, there was something
to be done in growing then—pineapples ordered at a guinea a pound, and
grapes at fifteen shillings, though of course you didn’t always get
your money. I’m blest if I won’t have another glass of rum and water.

“Well, old Squire Nicholas, as they call him now, was as proud as Punch
of his two fine daughters, and expected them to marry at least an earl
apiece, by their faces and fine figures. And they went about with great
folk in Town, and to Court, and all that sort of thing, looking fit to
marry the King almost, in their velvets, and their satin furbelows. The
eldest daughter was Arabella, our Miss Coldpepper to this day, and the
other was Miss Monica; as fine a pair of women as the Lord ever made.
But for all that, see what they come to!

“There was no love lost between them even then, jealous of one another
no doubt, like two cats over a fish-bone. Some said that one was the
handsomer of them, and some said the other. There was a good bit of
difference between them too, though any fool could tell they were
sisters. Such eyes and noses as you won’t see now, and hair that would
fall to their knees, I’ve been told, and complexions as clear as a
white-heart cherry, and a cock of the chin, and a lordly walk—they
deserved the name they went by in London, ‘the two Bright Suns of
Sunbury.’ But after all, what good came of it? One is an old maid, and
the other—well, not very likely to go to heaven, though she hasn’t had
much of that yet on earth. Kit, I have seen a deal of women, as much
as is good for any mortal man; and I tell you the first thing, and the
second, and the third, and the whole to the end of the chapter of them
depends upon their tempers. Ah, those two beauties were beauties at
that; but Miss Monica ever so much the worse.

“It seems that they both might have married very well, if it had not
been for that stumbling-block. Many young women go on so soft, and eye
you so pleasant, and blush so sweet, that you’d fancy almost there
was no such thing as a cross word, or a spitfire look, or a puckered
forehead in their constitution; and angels is the name for them, until
it is too late to fly away. But these two Misses had never learned how
to keep their tempers under for a week together; and it seems that
they never cared enough for any one to try to do it. Till there came
a man with a temper ten times as bad as both of theirs put together;
and then they fell in love with him hot and hearty. This was a younger
son of Lord Roarmore, a nobleman living in North Wales, or Ireland—I
won’t be certain which—and he was known as the Honourable Tom Bulwrag.
He used to drive the Windsor coach from London down to Hounslow; for
the passengers could stand him, while the stones and air were noisy;
but there he was forced to get down from the box; for nothing that
lived, neither man, nor horse, nor cow in the ditch, could endure this
gentleman’s language, when there was too much silence to hear it in.

“I suppose he was quiet among the ladies, as many men are, who can
speak no good. And perhaps our two ladies fell in love with him,
because he was a bigger sample of themselves. Not that they ever used
swearing words, only thought them, as it were, and let other people
know it. Any way, both of them took a fancy to him, though their father
would not hear of it; for the gentleman was not wealthy enough to have
any right to such wickedness. Perhaps that made them like him all the
more, for they always flew in the face of Providence. And for doing of
that, they both paid out, as generally happens here, that we may see it.

“So far as I can tell, and I had better chances of knowing than any
one else outside the house, everything was settled for the Honourable
Tom to run away to Bath with Miss Arabella, with special licence, and
everything square. But whether she was touched in heart about her
father (whose favourite she had always been), or whether her lover
came out too strong in his usual style, or whether her sister Monica
had egged her on to it, sure enough she blazed out into such a fury,
just when they were starting, and carried on so reckless, that the
Honourable Tom, who had never quite made up his mind, was frightened
of what she would be by-and-by, and locked her in a tool-house at the
bottom of the grounds, and set off with Miss Monica that same hour,
changing the name in the licence, and married her.

“Without being too particular, you might fairly suppose that a job
of this kind was not likely to end well. Miss Monica had taken with
her one—what shall I say? Certainly not servant, nor attendant, nor
inferior in any way—”

My uncle here seemed to feel a certain want of power to express
himself; and I knew that he was beating about the bush of the one and
only one romance of his dry and steady life. He turned away, so that I
could not see his eyes, and I did not wish to look at them.

“Well, that is neither here nor there,” he continued, after pushing
more tobacco into a pipe too full already; “but she took away a young
lady of this neighbourhood, to whom she appeared to be much attached,
and who alone had any power to control her furious outbreaks, just
because she always smiled at them, as soon as they were over. The
sweet-tempered girl could never quite believe that the Fury was in
earnest, because it was so far beyond her own possibilities; and the
woman of fury did a far worse thing than the wrecking of her own stormy
life, she also wrecked a sweet, and gentle, loving, and reasonable
heart. Never mind that; it often happens, and what does the selfish
Fury care? Miss Monica became, as I have said, the Honourable Mrs.
Bulwrag, and then she reaped the harvest she had sown.

“For in the first place Viscount Roarmore, being a hot-headed man
likewise, stopped every farthing of his son’s allowance, and said—‘Go
to your new father. Your pretty cousin Rose, with five thousand pounds
a year, was ready to marry you, in spite of all your sins, and you had
promised to marry her. You have taken one of those two girls, who were
called the “Bright Suns of Sunbury,” till people found out what they
were, and called them the two “Raging Suns.” Now rage her down, if you
can, and you ought to be more than a match for a woman. In any case,
expect no more from me.’

“Then the young man came to Squire Nicholas, and screwed himself
down to eat humble pie. But the Squire said, ‘Sir, you have married
my daughter without asking my leave, and against it. I still have a
dutiful daughter left. She is my only one henceforth.’ Then the young
man broke into the strongest language ever yet heard at Coldpepper
Hall, although it had never been weak in that line. He was very soon
shown the outside of the door, and got drunk for the night at the ‘Bell
and Dragon.’

“Then began the rough-and-tumble work between those two—the hugging
and the hating, the billing and the bullying, the kissing and the
kicking, all and every up and down of laughing, sobbing, scratching,
screeching, that might be in a wild hyena’s den. How they contrived to
hold together so long as they did, Heaven only knows, or perhaps the
opposite place to Heaven. There must have been some fierce love between
them, some strange suitability; as if each perceived the worst part of
himself or herself in the other, and flew to it, as well as flew at it.
What kept them together was a mystery; but what kept them alive was a
darker one. Without friends, or money, or credit, or visible robbery,
they fought on together, for five or even six years, now here and now
there. Three children they had, and fought over them of course, and
perhaps began to teach them to fight each other, at least so far as
example goes.

“But suddenly this queer union was broken up for ever. Mr. Bulwrag
did something which risked his neck; he believed that Squire Nicholas
was bound to contribute to the support of his grandchildren, and he
made him do his duty, without knowing it. Then, having arranged for a
three-days’ start, he was well upon his voyage before pursuit began.
It is not very easy to catch a man now, when he has a good start, and
knows the world; but five and twenty years ago, it was generally given
up as a bad job; unless the reward was astounding. No reward was
offered, and the Honourable Tom was next heard of from South America,
where there seemed to be a lot of little States, which never allow
their civil wars to abate their wars with one another. This condition
of things was exactly to his taste; his courage and strong language
made their way; he commanded the forces of one great Republic, with the
title of ‘Marshal Torobelle,’ and he promised to send some money home
in the last letter ever received from him.

“His deserted wife said after that, that she truly would believe in
everything, if she ever saw a ten-pound note from her beloved husband.
But she never was put to the trial, for the next news was that he
was dead. He had found it much to his advantage to learn to swear in
Spanish; and being proud of this, because he had little other gift
of lingo, he tried it upon a young Spanish officer, who did not take
it cordially. After parade, they had a private fight, and Marshal
Torobelle could swear no more, even in his native language. His
friends, for he seems to have been liked out there, wrote a very kind
letter in bad French, telling how grand he had been, and how faithful,
but grieving that he had left no affairs, to place them in a state to
remember him. Then the Marshal’s widow bought expensive mourning, for
he had left with her a thousand pounds of the proceeds of his forgery,
and wrote to his father, Lord Roarmore.

“Kit, I have found that one can generally tell what a man will do, in
certain cases, from a rough outline of his character. What a woman will
do, no man can tell, though he fancies he knows her thoroughly. My Lord
Roarmore was a violent man, and hot more than hard in his resolution.
And he took it very kindly that his son, when driven hard, had forged
the name of the father-in-law, and not of the father, as he might have
done. He was beginning to relent already, and finding it too late,
naturally relented altogether. He talked of his noble and gallant son,
and although himself in difficulties, bravely settled five hundred
pounds a year upon the widow and the little ones.

“I dare say you are surprised, my lad, that I should have come to know
so much of this unhappy story; more I believe than is even known by
the lady’s own sister—our Miss Coldpepper. Women are slower to forgive
than men, and slower in beginning to be forgiven. Arabella has never
forgiven her sister for running away with her lover; and Monica has
never forgiven her sister for making such a fuss about it. They may try
to pull together, when it suits their purpose; but the less they see
of one another, the greater the chance of their reconciliation. But I
am not come to the poor Captain yet; and, bless my heart, it is ten
o’clock! What a time to stay up about other people’s business! If you
want to hear the rest, you must have it to-morrow.”



ALL through the following day, we were forced to be hard at work,
whether we liked it or not, gathering a large lot of early apples, such
as Keswick, Sugarloaf, and Julien, which would have been under the
trees by this time in an early season. But this, through the chill and
continual rain of the time that should have been summer, was the latest
season within human memory; which (like its owners) is not very long.
And now a break-up of the weather was threatened, at which we could
not grumble, having now enjoyed ten days without any rain—a remarkable
thing in much better years than this. And in this year it truly was a
God-send, helping us to make some little push, before the winter closed
over us, and comforting us to look up to Heaven, without being almost
beaten down. The people who live in great cities, where they need
only go a few yards all day long, and can get beneath an awning or an
archway, if a drop of rain disturbs their hats, give the weather ten
bad words for every one we give it; though we are bound to work in it,
and worse than that, have our livelihood hanging upon it. Not that we
are better pleased than they; only that our more wholesome life, and
the strength of the trees, and the unexhausted air, perhaps put into us
a kinder spirit to make the best of things that are ordered from above.

Few things in the manner of ordinary work become more wearisome after a
while than the long-continued gathering of fruit. The scent, which is
delightful to those who catch a mere whiff of it in going by, becomes
most cloying and even irksome to those who have it all day in their
nostrils. And the beauty of the form and colour too, and the sleek
gloss of each fine sample, lose all their delight in the crowd of their
coming, and make us even long to see the last of them. Every man of us,
even Uncle Corny, to whom every basket was grist for the mill, felt
heartily glad when streaky sunset faded softly into dusk, when flat
leaf looked as round as fruit, and apples knocked our heads instead of
gliding into the ready hand.

“Now mind one thing,” said my uncle with a yawn, when after a supper
of liver and bacon knowingly fried by Mrs. Tabby, his pipe was between
his teeth and all his other needs were toward; “if I go on with my
tale to-night, I am likely enough to leave out something which may be
the gist of it. For I feel that sleepy, after all this job, that I can
scarcely keep my pipe alight. However, you have worked well to-day,
and shown no white feather for your sweetheart’s sake; and of course
you want to know most about her, and how she comes into this queer
tale. Poor young thing, she smiles as sweetly, as if she trod a path
of roses, instead of nettles, and briars, and flint! Ah, I suppose she
forgets her troubles, whenever she looks at you, my lad.” This made my
heart beat faster than any words of his tale I had heard till now.

“As if she cared for me! As if it were possible for any one to imagine
that she would ever look twice at me! Uncle Corny, I thought you were a
wiser man.” I hoped that this might lead him on.

“To be sure, I was making a mistake,” he answered, looking as if
it were just the same thing. “When I said you, I meant of course
Sam Henderson, the racing man. That’s the young fellow that has her
heart. How beautifully she smiled when I mentioned him, and blushed
when I said he was the finest fellow anywhere round Sunbury, and the
steadiest, and the cleverest.

“No, no, Kit; it’s all my fun. You needn’t be looking at the
carving-knife. You know how I hate Sam Henderson, a stuck-up puppy, and
a black-leg too, according to my ideas. A girl who respects herself, as
your Kitty does, would have nothing to say to him. But she might to a
fine young gardener perhaps.

“Well, I have told you all about the first marriage and the widowhood
of that precious Monica Coldpepper. What fools men are—what wondrous
fools! Here was a widow, not over young, with a notorious temper, and
no money, or none of her own at any rate, and hampered with three
children—let me tell you their names while I think of it, Euphrasia,
Donovan, and Geraldine—there’s no duty to pay on a name, you know. Now
would not any one have sworn that a woman like that might wear the
weeds, until she had stormed herself to death? Not a bit of it, my lad;
she married again, and she married the cleverest man in London; and
more than that, she got every farthing of his property settled upon
her, although the poor man had a child of his own! And I am told that
she might have had a dozen other men.

“She was still a fine woman certainly, for it must have been some
twelve years ago; and she is a fine woman to this very day, according
to those who have seen her; which I hope I may never do, for reasons
I will not go into. But beside her appearance, what one thing was
there to lead a sane man to marry her? And a man who had lost a
sweet-tempered wife, a beautiful, loving, and modest woman, as like
your Kitty as two peas! Sometimes I feel sorry for him, when I think
of his former luck; and sometimes I am glad that he is served out, for
making such a horrible fool of himself. Nearly any other man would have
hung himself, for the lady has gone from bad to worse, and is now a
thorough termagant; but this man endures her as if she were his fate.
Do you know who he is? You must know now.”

“Yes, I have known it, since you began; and from what other people
said, I suspected it before.” As I answered thus, I was thinking how
this condition of things would affect my chance.

“You don’t seem at all astonished, Kit;” my uncle went on with some
disappointment at losing his sensation. “You young folk have so little
sense, that you make it a point of honour never to be surprised by
anything. If anybody had told me, without my knowing it already, that
a man of great intellect, like Professor Fairthorn, would make such a
fool of himself, and then submit to have no life of his own, I should
have said it was a crazy lie. But there is the truth, my boy, not to
be got over; and far worse than at first sight appears. A man who robs
himself may be forgiven; but not a man who robs his children. It is the
difference between suicide and murder.

“Very likely, you are surprised that I, who have not a sixpence at
stake, and not even a friend involved in the matter, should get so hot
about it, as I can’t help being. There are plenty of viragoes in the
world; there are plenty of good men who cower before them, for the sake
of their own coward peace; also there are robberies in abundance, of
children who cannot defend themselves, and of people who can—so far as
that goes. And ninety-nine men in a hundred would say—‘Well, this is no
concern of mine. It is a very sad and shameful thing, but it does not
touch my bread and cheese. Great is truth, and it will prevail; and I
hope I may live to see it.’ But, Kit, my boy, the worst wrong of all
was mine. A deadlier wrong has been done to me, than of money or lands,
or household peace. My life has been wrecked by that devil of a woman,
as if it were a toy-boat she sunk with her slipper. I did not mean to
tell you—an old man cannot bear to talk of such things to young people.
Is your whole heart set upon your Kitty?”

I had never seen my uncle so disturbed before; and, to tell the plain
truth, I was frightened by it. Sometimes I had seen him in a little
passion, when he found a man he trusted robbing him, or the dealers
cheated him beyond the right margin, or some favourite plant was kicked
over; but he never lost his power then of ending with a smile, and a
little turn of words would change his temper. But this was no question
of temper now. His solid face was hardened, as if cast in stone; not a
feature of it moved, but his grey curls trembled in the draught, and
his hand upon the table quivered. I answered that my whole heart was
set upon my Kitty, but I knew that I should never win her.

“If she is true to you, you shall. That is, if you behave as a man
should do;” he spoke very slowly, and with a low voice, almost as if
talking to himself; “if you are wise enough to let no lies, or doubts,
or false pride come between you. There is no power but the will of
God, that can keep asunder a man and woman who have given their lives
to each other. All the craft, and falsehood, and violence of the world
melt away like a mist, if they stand firm and faithful, and abide their
time. But it must hold good on both sides alike. Both must disdain
every word that comes from lying lips, from the lips of all, whether
true or false, except one another. Remember, that is the rule, my lad,
if rogues and scoundrels, male or female, come between you and the one
you love. It has been a black streak in my life. It has kept me lonely
in the world. Sometimes it seems to knock me over still. I have not
spoken of it for years; and I cannot speak of it even now any more—not
any more.”

He rose from his chair, and went about the room, as if it were his
life, in which he was searching for something he should never find. To
turn his thoughts, and relieve my own, I took a clean pipe and filled
it; and began to puff as if I liked it, although in those days I seldom
smoked. This had been always a reproach against me; for a smoker seems
to love a contribution to his cloud.

“Well done, Kit, you are a sensible fellow;” said my uncle, returning
to his usual mood. “Tobacco is the true counterblast to care. You take
up your pipe, and I will take up my parable, without going into my own
affairs. I never told you how that confounded woman—the Lord forgive
me if I bear malice, for I trust that He shares it with me—how she
contrived to hook the poor Professor, and, what is still worse, every
farthing of his money.

“Not that I believe, to give the devil his due, that she sought him
first for the sake of his money. He had not very much of that—for it
seldom goes with brains that stamp their own coinage—but through his
first wife, a beautiful and loving woman, he owned a nice house with
large premises, in a rich part of London, or rather of the outskirts,
where values were doubling every year, as the builders began to rage
round it. Also he had about five thousand pounds of hers, which was not
under settlement, and perhaps about the same amount of his own, not
made by himself (for he had no gift of saving) but coming from his own
family. Altogether he was worth about twenty thousand pounds; which he
justly intended for his only child.

“This was pretty handsome, as you would say, and he took care not to
imperil it, by any of his patents, or other wasteful ways. He had
been for many years in the Royal Navy, and commanded at one time a
new-fangled ship, with iron sheathings, or whatever they are called,
which are now superseding the old man-of-war. Here he had seemed to
be in his proper element, for he knew the machinery and all that, as
well as the makers did, and much better than any of the engineers on
board; and he might have been promoted to almost anything, except for
his easy-going nature. He had not the sternness, and strength of will,
which were needful in his position; and though everybody loved and
respected him, the discipline of the ship in minor matters fell abroad,
and he was superseded.

“This cut him to the quick, as you may suppose; for he still was
brooding over the loss of his first dear wife, which had befallen him,
while he was away on some experimental cruise. Between the two blows,
he was terribly out of heart, and came back to his lonely London house,
in the state of mind, which is apt to lay a man at the mercy of a
crafty and designing woman. Unhappily he was introduced just then to
Mrs. Bulwrag; and she fell in love with him, I do believe, as far as
she was capable of doing it. Though she might have flown, and had been
flying at higher game in a certain sense, she abandoned all others, and
set the whole strength of her will, which was great, upon conquering
him. She displayed the most tender and motherly interest in his
little darling daughter; she was breathless with delight at his vast
scientific attainments, and noble discoveries; she became the one woman
in all the world, who could enter into his mind, and second his lofty
ideas for the grandeur of humanity. Unluckily they were so far apart in
their natures, that no collision yet ensued, which might have laid bare
her true character, and enforced the warnings of his many friends. Not
to make too long a story of it, she led him to the matrimonial altar—as
the papers call it—without any solicitor for his best man, but a very
sharp one behind her. With the carelessness of a man of genius, added
to his own noble faith in woman, he had signed a marriage settlement,
which gave her not only a life-interest in all his property, but a
separate power of disposal by assignment, which might be exercised at
any time. And the trustees were old allies of hers, who were not beyond
suspicion of having been something even more than that.

“However, she loved her dear Professor—as she insisted on calling
him—for a certain time, with the fervour of youth, though she must have
been going on for forty, and she led him about in high triumph, and
your Kitty was sent to a poor boarding-school. ‘The Honourable Mrs.
Bulwrag-Fairthorn,’ as, in defiance of custom, she engraved herself,
became quite the fashion among a certain lot, and aspired to climb yet
higher. For if she has a weakness, it is to be among great people, and
in high society. She changed the name of the poor Professor’s house
at South Kensington to ‘Bulwrag Park,’ she thought nothing of paying
thirty pounds for a dress, and she gave large parties all the night
long. Meanwhile he went about his work, and she took possession of
every halfpenny he earned, and spent it on herself and her children.
Her boy and two girls were pampered and indulged, while Kitty was
starved and threadbare.

“You have seen the sort of man he is—simple, quiet, and unpretending,
full of his own ideas and fancies, observing everything in the way of
nature, but caring very little for the ways of men. He kept himself
out of the whirl she lived in, and tried to believe that she was a
good, though rather noisy woman. But suddenly all his good-will was
shattered, and he nearly shared the same fate himself.

“He was sitting up very late one night, in the little room allowed
to him for the various tools, and instruments, and appliances, and
specimens, and all that sort of thing, which were the apple of his
eye; and by a special light of his own devising he was working up the
finish of some grand experiment, from which he expected great wonders,
no doubt. I don’t know how many kinds of acid he had got in little
bottles, and how many—I don’t know what their names are, but something
of a kail, like ‘Ragged Jack;’ and how many other itemies—as Tabby
Tapscott calls them—the Lord only knoweth, who made them; and perhaps
the men have got beyond even Him. At any rate, there he was, all in
his glory; and he would have given ten years of his life, to be let
alone for an hour or two. But suddenly the door flew open, as if with a
strong kick; and the shake, and the draught, set his flames and waters
quivering. He looked up with his mild eyes, and beheld a Fury.

“‘What do you mean by this?’ she cried. ‘Here I come home from Lord
Oglequince’s, where you left me to go by myself, as usual; and on my
red Davenport I find this! A fine piece of extravagance! Whose money is

“‘Well, Monica, it was not meant to go to you,’ the Professor replied;
for he saw what it was, a bill of about three pounds, for a cloak,
and a skirt, and a hat, or some such things, which his daughter’s
school-mistress had written for, because the poor girl was unfit to
be seen with the rest. ‘My dear, I will pay it, of course. You have
nothing to do with it. It was put on your desk by mistake altogether.’

“‘Oh, then you mean to do it on the sly! To spend on this little
upstart of yours the money that belongs to my poor children. Whose
house is this? Whose chair are you sitting on—for of course you never
have the manners to rise, when a lady comes to speak to you? Do you
think you will ever make a penny, by all your trumpery dibbles and
dabbles? I hate the sight of them, and I will not allow them. Hand me
that cane, with the sponge at the end.’

“The Captain arose under her rebuke, and looked at her with calm
curiosity, as if she were part of his experiment. He had never seen a
case of such groundless fury, and could scarcely believe that it was
real. Her blazing eyes were fixed on his, and her figure seemed to
tower, in her towering rage. Such folly however could not frighten
him; and he smiled, as if looking at a baby, while he handed her the

“‘You laugh at me, do you? You think I am your slave?’ she cried as
she swung the cane round her head, and he fully expected the benefit.
‘Because I am a poor weak woman, I am to be trampled on in my own
house, and come on my knees, at these shameful hours, to hold all your
gallipots and phials for you. Look, this is the way I serve your grand
science! There go a few of them, and there, and there! How do you like
that, Professor?—Oh, oh, oh!’

“At the third sweep of the cane among his chemical treasures, she had
dashed on the floor, among many other things, a small stoppered bottle
full of caustic liquid, and a fair dose had fallen on her instep, which
was protected by nothing but a thin silk stocking. Screeching with
pain, she danced round the room, and then fell upon a chair, and began
to tear her hair, in a violent fit of hysterics.

“‘It is painful for the moment; but there is no serious harm,’ said the
Captain, as he rang the bell for her own attendant; ‘fortunately the
contents of that bottle were diluted, or she might never have walked
again; if indeed such a style of progress is to be called walking. It
is most unwise of any tiro to interfere with these little inquiries. I
was very near a fine result; and now, I fear, it is all scattered.’

“The next day he did, what he should have done some months ago. He took
the copy of his marriage-settlement to a good solicitor, and found,
to his sad astonishment, that the boasts of the termagant were too
true. Under the provisions of that document—as atrocious a swindle
as was ever perpetrated—he could be turned out of his own house, and
the property he intended for his own child was at the mercy of her

“From the lawyer he got not a crumb of comfort. The settlement was his
own act and deed; there was no escaping from it. It had been prepared
by the lady’s solicitors; and he had signed it without consideration.
All very true; but he should have considered, and marriage was a
consideration, in the eye of the law, and a binding one. If the
Professor wished, the solicitor would take Counsel’s opinion, whether
there might be any chance of obtaining redress from Equity. But he
felt sure, that to do so would only be a waste of money. It was a most
irregular thing, that in such an arrangement, one side only should
be represented; but that was the fault of the other side, which
surrendered its own interests. In fact, it was a very fine instance of
confidence in human nature; and human nature had been grateful enough
to make the most of the confidence offered.

“If you did not know what the Professor is, you might suppose, Kit,
that he was overcome, and overwhelmed with the result of his own
neglect and softness. Not a bit of it; in a week’s time, he had mended
all his broken apparatus; and the only difference to be noticed was,
that he never began work without locking the door. His treatment of his
wife was the same as ever. He bore no ill-will, or at any rate showed
none, on account of that strong explosion; and he took thenceforth all
her fits of fury as gusts of wind, that had got in by mistake. It is
impossible for any woman to make a man of that nature unhappy. He would
have been happier, I dare say, and have done much more for the good of
the world, if he had married a peaceful woman; but I know very little
of those matters. Only, as you have an ordinary mind, be sure that you
marry a sweet-tempered woman. To bed, my boy, to bed! We must be up
right early.”



IN spite of all said to the contrary, I believe that young people, upon
the whole, are more apt to ponder than the old folk are. At least, if
to ponder means—as it should—to weigh in the balance of pros and cons
the probable results of their own doings. The old man remembers the
time he has lost, in thinking thoughts that came to naught; and he sees
that if they had come to much, that much would have been very little
now. The young man has plenty of time on his hands, and believes he
is going to do wonders with it, and makes a bright map of his mighty
course in life. And this is the wisest thing that he can do.

But when he falls in love, alas! his ripe wisdom is seldom applied to
himself. Like a roguish grocer, with a magnet in his counter, he brings
the scale down to his own liking; but he differs from him, in that he
cheats himself.

Being very wise in my own eyes, I pondered very carefully my next step;
not with any thought of retiring, but with a firm resolve to advance
in the strongest and most effective manner. My Uncle’s long story,
instead of damping, had added hot fuel to my ardour, and compassion
had lent a deeper tone to passion. Tender pictures arose before me of
my angelic Kitty, starved, and tortured, and snubbed, and trampled,
and (worst of all perhaps to a female body) shabbily, and grotesquely
dressed. Such a woman as my uncle had described was enough to drive the
largest-minded man to fury, and to grind the sweetest of her own sex,
into fragments of misery and despair. The one crumb of comfort I could
pick up, was that such cruelty must make my darling pine all the more
for tender love, and long perpetually for some refuge, however humble
it might be. But the point of all points was—how should I get at her?

All these things were passing through my mind for about the thousandth
time—yet all in vain—as I came back from Chertsey, on old _Spanker’s_
back, a day or two later in that same week. Old _Spanker_ was as good a
horse as ever tasted corn; and when we got together, we always seemed
to fall into very much the same vein of thought. Not that _Spanker_
had any love troubles, but plenty of other cares and considerations,
which brought him into tune with me, as we jogged along. If anything
went amiss on our premises, _Spanker_ seemed to find it out, not one
of us knew how, and to feel a friendly sadness for us, though it never
affected his appetite. So warm was his interest in our affairs, that
whenever he took a load to Covent Garden, the proper thing always
was to let him know how it had been disposed of; and Selsey Bill
declared that he came home with his ears pricked forward, or laid back,
according as the prices had been up or down. But Selsey Bill, with
seventeen hungry children, was himself as sympathetic as almost any

It was very nigh dark; for the days were drawing in, being nearly
come to the equinox, and the weather breaking up, as we had foreseen.
Indeed but for that, I should not have been here, for my uncle would
never have sent me to Chertsey, if the fruit had been fit to be
gathered to-day. “Never gather any fruit when it is wet, except a
horse-chestnut,” he used to say; “and you may find the flavour of that
improved.” But the rain had not been so very heavy, only just enough to
hang on things and make them sticky; and now there was a strong wind
getting up, which was likely to fetch down a hundred bushels.

The river was no longer in high flood, though still over its banks,
and turbulent; and I had not to ride through great stretches of water,
as our roads require one to do, even if they let him pass at all, when
the Thames comes down at its utmost. When I was a lad in 1852, we could
scarcely go anywhere without swimming. And now, without floods, I very
nearly had to swim; for old _Spanker_ stopped as suddenly as if he had
been shot, in a dark place, where there was a ditch beside the road;
and I, riding carelessly and mooning on my grievances, was as loose on
his back as my hat on my head. I just saved myself from flying over his
ears, and then flourished my whipstock, for I thought it was a footpad.

“Don’t be a fool, Kit. You have done a little too much of that to me

The voice was well known to me, and the glimmering light showed the
figure of Sam Henderson. He had a contemptuous manner of putting his
heels on the earth, with his toes turned up and out; as if the world
were not worth riding, except with a reckless attitude. But I was vexed
to be pulled up like this, and nearly cast out of the saddle. Therefore
I said something of his own sort.

“Young man, you don’t value my good intentions; and you are not at all
charmed with my new dodge, for fetching a horse up before he can think.
You saw I never touched your bridle. Well, never mind that. I’m not
going to teach you. How are things going on, at your crib, my boy?”

“Famously;” I answered, for it was not likely that I should discourse
of my troubles to him. “Nothing could be better, Mr. Henderson;
and since you have proved your new dodge satisfactory, I will say
‘Good-night,’ and beg you not to do it to me again.”

“What a confounded muff you are!” he continued with his slangy drawl,
which he had picked up perhaps at Tattersall’s; “do you think that I
would have come down this beastly lane, on a dirty night like this,
without I had something important to say? How about your Kitty?”

This was a little too familiar, and put me on my dignity. At the
same time it gave me a thrill of pleasure, as a proof of the public
conclusion upon a point of deep private interest.

“If you happen to mean, in your cheeky style, a young lady known as
Miss Fairthorn, and the niece of Miss Coldpepper, of the Hall; I can
only tell you that she is in London, with her father, the celebrated
Captain Fairthorn.”

“A pinch for stale news—as we used to say at school. Perhaps I could
give you a fresher tip, my boy; but I daresay you don’t care to hear
it. Perhaps you have put your money on another filly. So have I; and
this time it is a ripper.”

Little as I liked his low manner of describing things too lofty for his
comprehension, I could not let him depart like this. He lit a cigar
under _Spanker’s_ nose, as if he had been nobody, and whistling to
his bull-terrier Bob, turned away as if everything was settled. But I
called him back sternly, and he said, “Oh well, if you want to hear
more, you must turn into my little den down here.”

I followed him through a white gate which he opened in the high paling
that fenced his paddocks, and presently we came to a long low building,
more like a shed than a dwelling-house, but having a snug room or two
at one end. “This is my doctor’s shop,” he said; “and it serves for a
thousand other uses. No patients at present—will be plenty by-and-by.
Come into my snuggery, and have something hot. I will send a fellow
home with your old screw, and tell the governor not to expect you to
supper. Rump-steak and onions in ten minutes, Tom, and a knife and fork
for this gentleman! Now, Kit, put your trotters on the hob, but have a
pull first at this pewter.”

This was heaping coals of fire on my head, after all that I had done to
him; and I said something clumsy to that effect. He treated it as if it
were hardly worth a word; and much as I love to be forgiven, I like to
have done it to others much better.

“I never think twice of a thing like that,” he replied, without turning
to look at me. “A fellow like you who never sees a bit of life gets
waxy over nothing, and makes a fool of himself. You hit straight, and I
deserved it. I live among horses a deal too much to bear ill-will, as
the humans do. Let us have our corn, my boy; and then I will tell you
what I heard in town to-day, and you can grind it between your wisdom

In spite of all anxiety, I did well with the victuals set before me;
and Sam was right hospitable in every way, and made me laugh freely at
his short crisp stories, with a horse for the hero, and a man for the
rogue, or even a woman in some cases. I endeavoured to match some of
them with tales of our own nags, but those he swept by disdainfully. No
horse was worth talking of below the rank of thoroughbred; as a story
has no interest, until we come to the Earls, and the Dukes, and the

“Now,” said Sam Henderson, when the plates were gone, and glasses
had succeeded them; “Kit Orchardson, you are a very pleasant fellow;
considering how little you know of the world, I never thought there was
so much in you. Why, if you could get over your shyness, Kit, you would
be fit for very good society. But it is a mistake on the right side, my
boy. I would much rather see a young chap like that, than one of your
bumptious clodhoppers. I suppose I am the only man in Sunbury who ever
goes into high society. And I take good care that it never spoils me.
There is not a Lord on the turf that won’t shake hands with me, when he
thinks I can put him up to anything. But you can’t say I am stuck up,
can you now?”

“Certainly not,” I declared with warmth, for his hospitality was
cordial; “you keep to your nature through the whole of it. It would
spoil most of us to have so much to do with noblemen.”

“You and I should see more of one another,” Sam answered, with
gratification beaming in his very keen and lively eyes; “and if ever
you would put a bit of Uncle Corny’s tin upon any tit at long odds,
come to me. The finest tip in England free, gratis, and for nothing.
But I called you in for a different sort of tip. When I was at the
corner this afternoon, who should I see but Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot?
I dare say you may have heard of him. No? Very well, that proves just
what I was saying. You are as green as a grasshopper looking at a
cuckoo. ‘Pot,’ as we call him—and it fits him well, for his figure
is that, and his habits are black—is one of the best-known men in
London, and one of the worst to have much to do with. ‘Holloa, Sam,’ he
says, ‘glad to see you. What’ll you take for your old _Sinner_ now?’
_Sinner_, you must know, is my old mare _Cinnaminta_, the dam of more
winners than any other mare alive; and the old rogue knows well enough
that I would sooner sell my shadow, even if he had sixpence to put on
it. He gives himself out to be rolling in money, but all he ever rolls
in is the gutter. Well, sir, we got on from one thing to another; and
by-and-by I gave him just a little rub about a hatful of money I had
won of him at Chester, and never seen the colour of. ‘All right,’
he says, ‘down upon the nail next week. Haven’t you heard what’s up
with me?’ So I told him no, and he falls to laughing, enough to shake
the dye out of his grizzly whiskers. ‘Going to buckle to. By Gosh,
I mean it,’ says he; ‘and the sweetest young filly as ever looked
through a riband. Rejoices in the name of Kitty Fairthorn, just the
very name for the winner of the Oaks. Ha, ha, wish me joy, old chap.
She was down your way, I am told, last week. But I had spotted her
before that, Sam.’ I was thrown upon my haunches, as you may fancy,
Kit; but I did not let him see it; though to think of old Crumbly Pot
going in for such a stunner—‘Rhino, no doubt,’ I says; and he says,
‘By the bucketful! Her dad is a buffer who can sit down and coin it
in batteries. And only this kid to put it on; the others belong to
a different stable. Think of coming for the honeymoon, down to your
place. They tell me you keep the big crib empty.’ Well I only shook my
head at that, for the old rogue never pays his rent; and I asked him
when it was to be pulled off. ‘Pretty smart,’ he said; but the day not
named, and he must go first to Lincolnshire, to see about his property
there; which I happen to know is up the spout to its outside value,
though he always talks big on the strength of it. And no doubt he has
got over your grand Professor, with his baronetcy and his flourishing
estates. That’s about the tune of it, you may swear, Kit. Well, how do
you like my yarn, my boy?”

“Sam, it shall never come off;” I cried, with a stamp which made the
glasses jingle, and the stirrup-irons that hung on the wall rattle as
if a mad horse were between them. “I would rather see that innocent
young creature in her coffin than married to such a low brute. Why,
even if she married you, Sam, although it would be a terrible fall, she
would have a man, and an honest one comparatively to deal with. But as
to the Crumbly Pot, as you call him—”

“Well, old fellow, you mean well,” replied Henderson with tranquillity;
“though your compliments are rather left-handed. But you may look upon
me, Kit, as out of the running. I was taken with the girl, I won’t deny
it. But she didn’t take to me, and she took to you. And between you and
me, I am as sure as eggs that she hasn’t got sixpence to bless herself.
That wouldn’t suit my book; and I am no plunger.”

“She wants no sixpence to bless herself. She is blest without a
halfpenny. And a blessing she will be to any man who deserves her,
although there is none on the face of this earth—”

“Very well, very well—stow all that. A woman’s a dark horse, even to
her own trainer. But I’ve met with just as fine a bit of stuff, a
lovely young filly down at Ludred. She’s the only daughter of the old
man there; and if ever I spotted a Derby nag, he has got the next one
in his string this moment. I have not quite made up my mind yet; but
I think I shall go in for her. At any rate I’m off with the Fairthorn
lay. Why, there’s a cuss of a woman to deal with there, who’d frighten
a dromedary into fits, they say. I wonder if old Pot knows about it.
But Pot shan’t have her, if I can help it; and you may trust me for
knowing a thing or two. Come, let’s strike a bargain, Kit, and stick to
it like men. Will you help me with the Ludred job, if I do all I can
for you in the Fairthorn affair? Give me your hand on it, and I am your

I told him that I did not see at all how I could be of any service to
him, in his scheme on the young lady he was thinking of. But he said
that I could help him as much as I liked; for a relative of mine lived
in that village, an elderly lady, and highly respected, as she occupied
one of the best houses in the place; and more than that, it belonged
to her. It was some years now since I had seen her, but she had been
kind to me when I was at school; and Sam proposed that I should look
her up, and give a bright account of him, and perhaps do more than
that; for the young lady visited at her house, and valued her opinion
highly. I now perceived why Henderson had become so friendly, and was
able to trust him, as he had a good motive. Moreover I had heard of his
“lovely filly,” and even seen her when she was a child; and I knew that
her father (the well-known Mr. Chalker) had made a good fortune in the
racing business, and perhaps would be apt to look down upon Sam, from
the point of higher standing and better breeding. Being interested now
in all true love, I readily promised to do all I could, and then begged
for Sam’s counsel in my own case.

“Take the bull by the horns;” he said with his usual briskness. “Never
beat about the bush; that’s my plan, Kit. Go up, and see the governor,
and say,—‘I love your daughter; I hear she is awfully sat upon at home,
and doesn’t even get her corn regular. She has taken a great liking to
me; I know that. And although I am not a great gun, and am terribly
green, my Uncle Corny is a warm old chap; and I shall have all his land
and money, when he croaks. You see, governor, you might do worse. And
as for old Pot, if you knew the old scamp, you’d sooner kill your girl
than let him have her. Why, he can’t even square his bets; and all his
land in Lincolnshire is collared by the Moseys. Hand her to me, and
I’ll make her a good husband, and you shall come to our place, and live
jolly, when you can’t stand your devil of a wife no longer.’ Kit, I’ll
write it down for you, if you like. You say all that to him, exactly as
I said it; and if you don’t fetch him, turn me out to grass in January.”

I was much amused that Henderson should call me “green,” and yet
be in earnest with such absurdity as this; which I recommended him
(since he had such faith in it) to learn by heart, and then repeat,
with the needful alterations, to the gentleman whose daughter he was
anxious now to win. However, though indignant and frightened sadly
at the news about that vile baronet, I was pleased on the whole with
Sam’s behaviour, though not with his last words; which were these, as
he left me at the top of the village, and he uttered them with much
solemnity—“I say, who stole the dog? Talk of angels, after that!”



IF any one had told me, so lately as last week, that Sam and myself
would be sworn allies upon matters of the deepest interest, within
fifty years of such a prophecy, I should have considered him as great a
liar as the greatest statesman of the present period prove themselves
daily out of their own mouths. Although I had not then the benefit
of knowing how the most righteous of mankind deceive us, I knew well
enough that the world is full of rogues, for no man can visit Covent
Garden twice without having that conviction forced upon him. And Sam
Henderson’s quiet grins at my “greenness” naturally led me to ponder
just a little upon the possibility of his trafficking upon it. However,
I am glad to say, and still hold to it, that neither then, nor even in
my later troubles, which were infinitely deeper than any yet recounted,
did I ever pass into the bitter shadow through which all men are beheld
as liars.

The difficulty was to know what to do next. If I did nothing, which
was the easiest thing to do—and a course to which my bashfulness and
ignorance inclined me—the foulest of all foul wrongs might triumph;
the sweetest and most lovable of all the fair beings, who are sent
among the coarser lot to renew their faith in goodness, might even by
virtue of her own excellence become a sacrifice to villainy. I knew
that my darling had that strong sense of justice, without which pure
gentleness is as a broken reed; and I felt that she also had a keen
perception of the good and the bad, as they appear in men. But, alas! I
knew also that she loved her father before any one on earth, and almost
worshipped him, which he deserved for his character at large, but not
so entirely for his conduct to herself. He was always kind and loving
to her when the state of things permitted it; but the bent of his
nature was towards peace, and in the strange home, which had swallowed
him, there was no peace, either by day or night, if he even dared to
show that he loved his own child. The blackest falsehoods were told
about her, and the lowest devices perpetually plied—as I discovered
later on—to estrange the father from the daughter, and rob them of
their faith in one another. But this part of her story I mean to pass
over with as light a step as possible, for to dwell on such matters
stirs the lower part of nature, and angers us without the enlargement
of good wrath. We must try to forgive, when we cannot forget, and
endeavour not to hope—whenever faith allows us—that the cruel and
inhuman may be basted with red pepper for more than a millennium of the
time to come.

But as yet I had none of this clemency in me. Youth has a stronger
and far more militant sense of justice than middle age. I was fired
continually with indignation, and often clenched my fists, and was
eager to rush at a wall with no door in it, when my uncle’s tale and
Sam’s confirmation came into my head like a whirlwind. “What a fool I
am, what a helpless idiot!” I kept on muttering to myself; “the murder
will be done before I move.”

I could see no pretext, no prospect whatever, no possibility of
interference; and my uncle (to whom I confided my misery) could only
shake his head, and say—“Very bad job, my boy. You must try to make the
best of it.”

Probably it would have made the worst of me, and left me to die an
old bachelor, if it had not been for a little chance, such as no one
would think much of. Time was drawing on, without a sign of sunshine
in it; when to pick up a very small crumb of comfort, and recall the
happiest day I had ever known yet, I went to my cupboard, and pulled
out a simple sketch in water colours, which I had made of the stricken
pear-tree; after some one had made of it the luckiest tree that ever
died. She had not finished her work of art, partly through sweet talk
with me; and I hoped to surprise her and compare our portraits, when
she should come to complete her drawing. Now as I glanced, and sighed,
and gazed, and put in a little touch with listless hands, my good
genius stood behind me, in the form of a little old woman, holding in
one hand a bucket, and in the other a scrubbing-brush.

“Lor’, how bootiful ’e have dooed ’un!” Tabby Tapscott cried, as if
she would like to have a turn at it with her reeking brush. “A can zee
every crinkle crankum of they leaveses, and a girt bumble-drum coom to
sniff at ’un. Her cudn’t do ’un half so natteral as thiccy, if her was
to coom a dizen taimes, for kissy-kissy talk like. Think I didn’t clap
eyes upon ’e both? Good as a plai it wor, and the both of ’e vancying
nobbody naigh! Lor’, I niver zee nort more amoosin!”

“Then all I can say is, you ought to have that bucket of slops thrown
over you. What business of yours, you inquisitive old creature?”

“That be vaine manners after arl as I dooed, to vetch ’un here for you
to carr’ on with! Ha, ha, ha, I cud tell ’e zummat now, if so be I was
mainded to. But I reckon ’e wud goo to drow boocket auver Tabby?”

This renewed my courtesy at once, for I had great faith in Tabby’s
devices; and after some coying, and the touch of a crooked sixpence,
she told me her plan, which was simplicity itself, so that I wondered
at my own dulness. I was to find out where Captain Fairthorn lived,
which could be done with the greatest ease; and then to call and make a
point of seeing him, on the plea of presenting him with a perfect copy,
such as his daughter had no time to finish. Who could tell that good
luck might not afford me a glimpse at, or even a few words with, the
one who was never absent from my mind? And supposing there were no such
bliss as that, at least I could get some tidings of her, and possibly
find a chance of doing something more. Be it as it might, I could make
things no worse; and anything was better than this horrible suspense.
I consulted my uncle about this little scheme, and he readily fell in
with it; for he could not bear to see me going about my work as if my
heart were not in it, and searching the papers in dread of bad news
every morning. And finding that I could be of use to him in London, he
proposed that I should go that very night in the fruit-van, with Selsey
Bill, and the thief-boy—that is to say, the boy who kept watch against
thieves, of whom there are scores in the market.

When I found my way, towards the middle of the day, to that wild
weald—as it then was—of London, which is now a camp of Punch-and-Judy
boxes strung with balconies, it took me some minutes to become
convinced that I was not in a hop-ground turned upside down. Some
mighty contractor was at work in a breadth and depth of chaos; and
countless volcanoes of piled clay, which none but a demon could have
made to burn, were uttering horizontal fumes, not at all like honest
smoke in texture, but tenfold worse to cope with. Some thousands of
brawny navvies, running on planks (at the head pirate’s order) with
skeleton barrows before them, had contrived (with the aid of ten
thousand tin pots) to keep their throats clear and their insides going.
Not one of them would stop to tell me where I was; all gave a nod and
went on barrowing; perhaps they were under conditions, such as occur to
most of us in the barrow-drive of life, when to pause for a moment is
to topple over.

After shouting in vain to these night-capped fellows, I saw through the
blue mist of drifting poison, a young fellow, perhaps about twenty-one,
who seemed to be clerk of the works, or something; and I felt myself
fit to patronize him, being four or five years his elder, and at
least to that amount his bigger. But for his better he would not have
me, and snapped in such a style that I seemed to belong almost to a
past generation. “Fairthorn?” he said. “Yes, I may have heard of him.
Elderly gent—wears goggles, and goes in for thunderbolts. Don’t hang
out here, stops business. Three turns to the left, and ask the old

I was much inclined to increase his acquaintance with apples, by giving
him one to his eye—external, and not a treasure; but before I could
even return his contempt, he was gone, and left me in the wilderness.
At last I found a boy who was looking after pots, and for twopence he
not only led me truly, but enlightened me largely as to this part of
the world. He showed me where the “Great Shebissun” was to be, and
how all the roads were to be laid out, and even shook his head (now
twelve years old) as to the solvency of this “rum rig.” He dismissed me
kindly—with his salary doubled—at the gate of the great philosopher;
and with his finger to his nose gave parting counsel.

“Best not go in, young man. The old codger can blow you to bits, by
turning a handle, and the old cat’ll scratch your wig off. But there’s
a stunnin’ gal—ah, that’s what you’re after! I say, young covey, if
you’re game for a bit of sweet’artin’ on the sly, I’ll show yer the
very nick for it.” He pointed to a gate between two old trees, and
overhung with ivy. “How does I know?” he said, anticipating briskly any
doubt on my part; “s’help me taters, it’s the only place round here as
I never took a pot of beer to.”

Anxious as I was, I smiled a little at this criterion of a
trysting-place, and then did my utmost to fix in mind the bearings of
this strange neighbourhood. Although I knew the busy parts of London
well enough, of the vast spread of out-skirts I knew little, except
the ups and downs of the great roads through them, and here and there
a long look-out from the top of Notting Hill, or any other little
eminence. Even so I had only lost my eyes in a mighty maze of things
to come, and felt a deep wonder of pity for the builders, who were
running up houses they could never fill. The part I was now exploring
lay between the two great western roads, and was therefore to me an
unknown land. But I felt pretty sure that the house now before me had
been quite lately a mere country mansion, with grounds not overlooked,
and even meadows of its own, where cows might find it needful to low to
one another, and a horse might go a long way to find a gate to scratch

Even now there was a cattle-pond (the dregs of better days) near the
gate that led up from the brickfields; and half a dozen ancient Scotch
firs leaned in a whispering attitude towards one another; perhaps they
alone were left of a goodly group, trembling at every axe that passed.
The house itself was long, low, and red, and full of little windows,
upon whose sills a straggling ilex leaned its elbows here and there,
and sparrows held a lively chivvy. There was not a flower in the beds
in front, and the box-edging of the walks was as high and broad as a
wheel-barrow. Two large cedars, one at either corner of the sodden
grass-plot, looked like mighty pencils placed to mark the extent of the

Descrying no one (except an ancient dog of mighty stature, and of some
race unknown to me, who came up in a friendly manner) I summoned all
my courage, with good manners at the back of it, and pulled a great
bell-handle hanging, like a butcher’s steelyard, between two mossy
piers of stone. There was no sound of any bell inside, and I was
counting the time for another pull, when the door was opened some few
inches, and sharp black eyes peered out at me.

“Subscription Bible? No, thank you, young man. Cook was put into
County-court last time.”

I did not know what she meant, until I saw that she was glancing at the
poor portfolio, of my own make, which held my unpretentious drawing. “I
am not come for any subscription,” I said, drawing back from the door,
as she seemed to suspect that I would try to push it open. “I have the
pleasure of knowing Captain Fairthorn, and I wish to see him.”

“Don’t think you can,” she answered sharply; “but if you will tell me
what your business is, I will ask the Mistress about it. You may come,
and wait here, while I go to her. Scrape your boots first, and don’t
bring in any clay.”

This did not sound very gracious; but I obeyed her orders with my best
smile, and producing two very fine pears, laid them on the black marble
chimney-piece of the hall. Her sallow face almost relaxed to a smile.

“Young man from the country? Well, take a chair a minute, while I go
and ask for orders about you.” With these words she hastened up an old
oak staircase, and left me at leisure to look about.

The hall was a large but not lofty chamber, panelled with some dark
wood, and hung with several grimy paintings. Two doors at either end
led from it, as well as the main staircase in the middle, and a narrow
stone passage at one corner. The fireplace was large, but looked as
if it had more to do with frost than fire; and the day being chilly
and very damp, with an east wind crawling along the ground, I began to
shiver, for my feet were wet from the wilderness of clay I had waded
through. But presently the sound of loud voices caught my ear, and
filled me with hot interest.

One of the doors at the further end was not quite closed, and the room
beyond resounded with some contention. “What a fool you are to make
such a fuss!” one feminine voice was exclaiming—“Oh, don’t reason
with her,” cried another, “the poor stupe isn’t worth it. The thing
is settled, and so what is the use of talking? How glad I shall be to
see the last of her wicked temper and perpetual sulks. And I am sure
you will be the same, Jerry. Nothing surprises me so much as Mamma’s
wonderful patience with her. Why, she hasn’t boxed her ears since

“It isn’t only that,” replied the first; “but, Frizzy, consider the
indulgences she has had. A candle to go to bed with, almost every
night, and a sardine, positively one of our sardines, for her dinner,
the day before yesterday. Why, she’ll want to be dining with us, the
next thing! The more she is petted, the worse she gets. Now don’t you
aspire to dine with us, you dear, you darling, don’t you now?”

“I am sure I never do,” replied a gentle voice, silvery even now,
though quivering with tears; “I would rather have bread and water by
myself in peace, than be scolded, and sneered at, and grudged every
mouthful. Oh, what have I done to deserve it all?”

“I told you what would come of reasoning with her,” said the one who
had been called “Frizzy”—probably Miss Euphrasia Bulwrag; “it simply
makes her outrageous, Jerry. Ever since she came back from Sunbury,
there has simply been no living with her. And she looks upon us as her
enemies, because we are resolved that she shall do what is best for
her. Lady Hotchpot—what can sound better? And then she can eat and
drink all day long, which seems to be all she cares for.”

“That’s a little mistake of yours,” answered Miss Jerry, or Geraldine;
“I know her tricks even better than you do. She cares for something,
or somebody, some clodhopper, or chawbacon, down in that delightful
village. Why, you can’t say ‘Sunbury,’ in the most innocent manner,
without her blushing furiously. But she’s so cunning—I can’t get out of
her who the beloved chawbacon is. Come now, Kitty, make a clean breast
of it. I believe it’s the fellow that bets down there, and lives by
having families of horses. Sir Cumberleigh told me all about him, and
had a rare laugh; you should have seen him laugh, when I said that our
Kitty was smitten. Well, I hoped she had a little more principle than
that. And you’d think that butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth!”

“Butter never gets a chance”—I heard my darling say, and knew by her
voice that the sweetest temper in the world was roused at last—“your
mother never lets it go into my mouth; while you have it thicker than
your bread almost. But I’ll thank you to enjoy among yourselves, or
with any old rake you may fawn upon, your low and most ignorant gossip
about me. You had better not strike me. Your mother may. But I will not
take it from either of you; nor from both together.”

I could scarcely contain myself, I assure you; and if the young
tyrants had fallen upon her, I must have got into a nice position—in
the old, but not in the new sense of “nice”—that of bodily conflict
with women. Luckily, however, these were cowards, as behoved such
creatures; and I verily believe that my angel (if driven—as no angel
should be—into a free fight) would have made a bad record of both of

I was hovering, as it were, upon my legs, burning to dash into the
room, yet shuddering at the strange intrusion, when Miss Fairthorn
came out very quietly, and holding her handkerchief to her streaming
eyes. The door was banged behind her, as if by a kick, and a loud
contemptuous laugh came through it. What I did is a great deal more
than I can tell; for I must have been carried far beyond myself, by
pity, indignation, and ardent love.

“Oh, don’t!” said Kitty, as I stood before her, almost before she could
have used her eyes, being overcome with weeping; but the glance she
gave me had told the thing that I cared for most in earth or heaven.
And the strangest point was that we felt no surprise at being together
in this wondrous way. To me it seemed right that she should fall into
my arms; and to her it seemed natural that I should drop from heaven.
“Oh, don’t!” said Kitty, but she let me do it.

I kissed away her tears, and I cannot tell you whether they gave me
more bliss or pain; I stroked her softly nestling hair, as if it all
belonged to me; and I played with her pretty fingers, putting them
one by one between my great things, to make the thrilling process
last. Then I looked once more into her lovely eyes—the wells of all my
life-springs now—and lo, their tears were flown; and hope, and woman’s
faith, and heaven’s own love, were beaming from their lustrous depth,
as the light that proves the jewel true!

“Darling of my life,” was all I said; and she only answered—

“Yes, dear.”



NOW anybody may suppose, who looks at things too sensibly, that true
love never yet has chosen time and place more foolishly, for coming to
grand issue, and obtaining pledge for ever. The sour-faced woman might
have returned in the crisis of our doings, or the two young tyrants
might have broken forth, and made sport of us from the parlour. Whether
we knew these things or not, we never gave a thought to them; all we
thought of was one another, and the rest might think what they liked of
us. This is not a large way to look at things; and yet once in a life,
the largest.

My Kitty—as I called her now, and have never since wanted any other
name—was the first (as behoved the more sensitive one) to bring common
sense to bear on us.

“You must come and see my father, dear,” she whispered, with her hands
in mine; “I am sure that he loves me all he can. And if you have quite
made up your mind that you cannot do without me, we may trust him to
make the best of it; for he always makes the best of things.”

“Show me where he is,” I answered, scarcely yet believing that my
fortune was so glorious; while she looked at me as only one in the
world can ever look at us; “I fear that he will be sadly vexed; but he
is kind to every one.”

“He will not be vexed on his own account, nor yet on mine,” she
answered very quietly; “but nobody knows what he has to bear. Let us go
to him, while he is by himself. There is some one coming; we must be

We hastened down the long stone passage, just in time to escape the
servant, who at last had found her mistress; and after passing several
doors, we came to one with an iron bar, and iron rails, in front of it.

“See how he has to protect himself! If somebody knew that I have this
key, it would very soon be torn from me. I dare say you are surprised;
such things are not done down at Sunbury. How I love that quiet place!”

“And you shall live there all your life,” I answered, as we passed
the barrier; “no one shall dare to insult you there; you shall be the
Queen, the Queen of all; and you know who will be your slave of slaves.”

“That is all very fine talk,” she said; “I believe it is the usual
style at first; and then we come to Bramah locks, and cold iron.”

But her smile, as she put her hand on my shoulder, proved that her own
heart taught her better.

“Let me go in first, and see what he is doing. Oh, Kit, you have taken
advantage enough. What right have you to say that it is your last
chance? I am sure I hope not. Oh, how mean of you to turn my own words
against me! Now have a little reason. Yes, yes, yes. For the fiftieth
time at least, in five minutes—I love you, and never will have anybody
else. Now let me go in first; sometimes he is too busy for even me to
interrupt him.”

Much against my will, I let her go, for half an hour later would have
done as well according to my judgment; and after securing the fence
behind us, which had wholly escaped my attention, she knocked at the
door of the inner room, and without being answered opened it.

Her father was sitting with his back to us, so intent upon some small
object that he did not hear our footsteps. Some instrument made of
brass and glass, but quite unlike a microscope, was in his left hand,
and with the other he was slowly revolving something. The appearance
of the room amazed me, with its vast multitude of things unknown to me
even by name or shape, but all looking full of polished mischief and
poisonous intelligence.

“This is why my Kitty weeps, and is starved and crushed by female
dragons,” I said to myself in bitter mood; and even the Professor’s
grand calm head, and sweet scientific attitude, did not arouse the
reverence which a stranger would have felt for him.

His daughter touched, as lightly as a frond of fern might touch it,
one of his wavering silver locks, and waited with a smile for him to
turn. But I saw that her bosom trembled, with a sigh of deeper birth
than smiles. Then he turned and looked at her, and knew from the eyes,
that were so like his own, and yet so deeply different, that she had
something he must hear.

“You have been crying again, my child,” he said as he kissed her
forehead; “they promised me you should be happy now.”

“Yes, if I let them do what they like. Father, you have no idea what
it is. I am never allowed to see you alone, except by stealth, and at
fearful risk. Father, come out of philosophy and science, and attend to
your own child.”

“But my dear, I do. It is the very thing that is in my mind
continually. I spoke very strongly not a week ago, and received a
solemn promise that you should have new clothes, and diet the same as
the rest, and everything I could think of for your good.”

“How many times have they promised it, father? And then I am beaten
and put on bread and water, for having dared to complain to you. But
all that is a trifle, a thing soon over. I must expect that sort of
thing, because I have no mother. But, father, what they are trying to
do to me is ten times worse than ragged clothes, or starvation, or
bodily punishment. They want me to marry a man I detest—an old man, and
a bad one!”

“My dear, I have promised you, and you know that you can rely on my
promises, that you shall not even be allowed to marry a man of doubtful
character. I have not been able, my darling Kitty, to do everything I
should have liked for you; but one thing is certain—if inquiries prove
that this gentleman—I forget his name—is a man of bad life and unkind
nature, you shall have nothing to do with him. You know how little I am
able now to go into what is called ‘Society,’ and most of my friends
are men of my own tastes. But I have taken particular trouble, at the
loss of much important time, to ascertain whether your opinion of
this person is correct. He is wealthy and of good family, I am told,
though that is merely a secondary point. He is likely to have outlived
youthful follies; and the difference of age is in your favour.”

“But not in his”—interrupted Kitty, with a smile, for which I could
have kissed her fifty times, it was so natural, and simple, yet

“You are flippant, my dear, in spite of all your troubles,” continued
her father, smiling also. “No length of discipline has entirely tamed
you. And now I will tell you why I am so anxious that you should have a
settled home, and some one to take care of you, as soon as can suitably
be arranged. I am likely to leave England, on a roving expedition,
for how long a time is as yet uncertain. It may be for a twelvemonth,
or even more, possibly for two years; and all that time, where will
you be, my darling child? I know that you are not happy now; though
my object in making this second arrangement was mainly to have you
protected and cared for. But things have not turned out exactly as I
hoped; and I fear that in my absence they may grow still worse. When I
heard that this gentleman was strongly attached to you, and wished you
to become his wife this winter, I hoped that I might be of some little
service to the cause of knowledge, without any neglect of my duty to
you. And I may tell you, my child, that through a long course of rather
extravagant habits, which I have failed to check, it is become of great
importance to me, so far as mere money goes—which is not much—to
accept the appointment which is offered me. I am often deeply grieved
at your condition, and do my very utmost to improve it; but am not
always allowed; as you know, my dear, and are very sweet and patient
with me—I am not always allowed to have my own way.”

“Don’t put it so, papa. That is not half the truth. Say that you never
have been allowed, never are, and never will be, to have so much as a
barleycorn of your own way.”

“Young people put things in too strong a light,” the man of science
answered gently. “But we will not go into that question now. Only you
will see, my dear, from what I have said, why I am so anxious that you
should be settled in a happy and peaceful home of your own, far away
from all those who worry you. This gentleman offers you a wealthy home;
but knowing your nature, I do not insist on that. Indeed I should be
quite satisfied with a very humble home for my darling, if it were a
happy one.”

“Very well, papa, nothing could be nicer. I can please you now exactly,
and meet all your wishes, though I cannot bear to hear of your leaving
me so long. But you will not leave me to the tender mercies”—here my
Kitty beckoned to me to come forward, which I had long been most eager
to do, but in obedience to her signals, had remained by the door and
behind a tall case of some wheel within wheel-work, almost as complex
as human motives—“father, you see that you need not leave me to the
tender mercies of anybody, except this gentleman, who saved my life at
Sunbury, as you know, and wishes to make it a part of his own, for the
rest of it.”

Captain Fairthorn looked at me with extreme surprise; my idea of his
character was that nothing upon or below the earth could surprise him.
But he had his glasses on; and these always seem to me to treble the
marks of astonishment in the eyes that stand behind them. In deference
to his large intellect, and fame, and great (though inactive) nobility
of nature, I waited for him to begin, though I am sure—now I come to
think of it—that he would have been glad for me to take the move.

“Kitty,” he said at last, with some relief at not having to fall upon
me yet, “I should like to know a little more of this story. I remember
this young man very well. But his name has escaped me for the moment.
He will not think me rude. It is one of the many penalties we pay for
undue devotion to our own little subjects. If he had been a zoophyte,
or a proboscidian, or even one of the constituents—”

“If he had been a zoophyte, papa, or anything else with a very
big name, and a very little meaning,” Miss Fairthorn exclaimed in
reproachful tones, “where should I be now? At the bottom of the Thames.
And perhaps you would enjoy dredging for me.”

“In spite of all training, she has a temper;” the father addressed
this remark to me. “Also she has a deep sense of gratitude—a feeling
we find the more largely developed, the further we travel from the
human order. But, my dear, you allow yourself vague discursions. In a
matter like this you have brought before me, my desire is always to be
practical. That great and original investigator, to whom we owe not
only knowledge, but what is even more important, the only true course,
by which to arrive—”

“My dear father, if you once begin on that—the knowledge we want, and
a quick course to it, is whether you will be so good and so kind, as
to make us both happy by your consent. This gentleman loves me; and I
love him. He is not wealthy; but he is good. You may leave me in his
care, without a doubt. I have not known him long; but I know him as
truly as if we had been brought up together. The only fault he has
is that he cannot praise himself. And his reverence for you is so
strong and deep, that it makes him more diffident than ever. You are
dreadfully diffident yourself, papa, you know you are; and that makes
me so despise all boastful people. Now fully understand that I won’t
have that horrible old Sir Cumbrous Hotchpot, and I will have this Kit
Orchardson; that is to say, with your leave, father. And you owe me
something, I should think, after all—but I have no right to speak of
that. Only, if you don’t give it, mind, I’ll—I’ll—” As a sample of what
she would do, she began to sob deeply; and I caught her in my arms.

“You see, sir,” I said—“oh, don’t, my darling; your father is the
kindest man in the world, and he will never have the heart to make you
unhappy—you see, sir, how good she is, and how simple, and ready to be
satisfied even with me. I am a poor man, and I have my way to make;
but with her I could make it to—to—” I was going to say “heaven,” but
substituted, “the top of the tree. And we have a pretty place, where
she would be happy as the day is long. And if I don’t protect her, and
cherish her, and worship her, and keep her as the apple of my eye, I
hope you will take me by the neck, Captain Fairthorn, and put me under
this air-pump.”

“How do you know that is an air-pump?” he asked, with admiration of my

“By the look, sir,” I replied; “I have seen them before.”

“Well, then, it isn’t; neither does it much resemble one. Kitty, you
see what his diffidence is; and another proof, I suppose, is, that he
has fallen in love with you?”

“Yes,” said my darling, with a smile so humble, and loving, and
confiding, that my eyes grew moist, and her father could not see
through his spectacles; “it is a sure proof of his diffidence; for he
deserves to have a better wife than I shall ever be; although I will do
my best to please him.”

“Well, after that,” replied Captain Fairthorn, “it seems to me, that my
opinion matters very little. You appear to have made up your minds; and
your minds appear to have been made for one another. I am wholly unable
to withstand such facts. Of course I shall make my inquiries, Master
Kit. But so far as I can see at present, I will not deny you what you
have won. If she is half as good to her husband as she always has been
to her father, you will be a happy man, God willing. There kiss me, my
pretty dear, and don’t cry any more, till he makes you.”



SUCH is the balance of human events—if the phrase be held
admissible—that the moment any member of our race is likely to strike
the stars with his head sublime, he receives a hard thump upon that
protuberance, and comes down with a crown—but a cracked one. As
for myself—an unpretentious fellow, and of very simple intellect,
though not quite such a fool as the world considered me in my later
troubles,—desiring always to tell the truth, I will not deny that I
walked on air, when I found myself gifted with my Kitty’s love, and her
large-hearted father’s assent to it. It had been arranged that I must
wait, and keep my bliss inside my waistcoat, until such time as slower
prudence and clearer foresight might prescribe. But all I thought of
were the glorious facts that Kitty loved me as I loved her, and that
her father, who alone could enter sound denial, would not deny. “What
do I care for that old stepmother?” I said to myself, as I buttoned my

That coat was henceforth sacred to me. There may have been smarter and
grander coats, coats with more tone of high art about them, and of
sleeker and richer substance. But this coat was enriched for ever with
at least three tears from Kitty’s eyes, Kitty’s lovely hair had fallen
like a vernal shower upon it, and her true heart had quivered to it,
when she owned whose heart it was. I knew that it might be my duty now
to start a new coat of loftier order, to keep me abreast of my rise in
the world, as the son of a celebrated man; nevertheless this would be
the coat to look back upon and look up to, as it hung upon a holy peg,
with the pockets full of lavender.

I had said farewell to my dear love, and was just beginning to think
how I would come it over Uncle Corny, telling him a bit, and then
another bit, and leading him on to laugh at me, until I should come out
with news which would make him snap his favourite pipe—when suddenly,
near the Captain’s gate, I felt a sharp tug from behind. The dusk was
gathering, and I meant to put my best foot foremost, and walk all the
way to Sunbury, scarcely feeling the road beneath my feet.

“What do you want, little chap?” I asked, for it was not in my power
then to speak rudely to any living creature, although I was vexed at
losing time.

“If you please, young man, my lady says that you are to come back and
speak to her. You are to come with me to the door over there. And you
must be careful how you scrape your boots.”

I looked at the boy, and felt inclined to laugh. He was dressed in
green from head to foot, and two or three dozen gilt buttons shone
in a double row down the front of him. For a moment I doubted about
obeying, until it occurred to me that if I refused, my sin might be
visited upon another. So I turned and followed the page, who seemed
to think disobedience impossible. He led me to a door at the west end
of the house, and then up a little staircase to a fine broad passage,
with statues and pictures looking very grand indeed. Before I could
take half of it into my mind, he opened a door with carved work upon
it, and showed me into the grandest room I had ever entered, except in
show places, such as Hampton Court, or Windsor Castle. All this part of
the house was so different from the other end that I was amazed, when I
came to think of it.

But I could not think now of floors and ceilings, or even chairs and
tables, as I walked with my best hat in my hand, towards a tall lady
very richly dressed, who stood by the mantelpiece, almost like a figure
carved upon it. Her thick and strong hair seemed as black as a coal,
until one came to look into it; and then it showed an undercast of red,
such as I never saw in any other person. Her form was large and robust
and full, and as powerful as that of any ordinary man; but the chief
thing to notice was her face and eyes. Her face was like those we see
cut in shell, to represent some ancient goddess, such as I read of at
Hampton School—Juno, or Pallas, or it may have been Proserpine, my
memory is not clear upon those little points—but although I remember a
god with two faces, and a dog with three heads, I cannot call to mind
any goddess among them endowed with three chins. “My lady,” as the boy
in green had called her, certainly did own three fine chins, as well as
a mouth which was too large for the shells, and contemptuous nostrils
that seemed to sift the air, and bright eyes with very thick lids for
their sheath—and they wanted a sheath, I can tell you—and a forehead
which looked as if it could roll, instead of only wrinkling, when the
storm of passion swept it.

As yet I was too young to understand that justice and kindness are the
only qualities entitling our poor fellow-mortals to respect. I had
passed through no tribulation yet, and coped with none of the sorrows,
which enlarge, when they do not embitter, the heart. Therefore I was
much impressed by this lady’s grandeur and fine presence, and made her
a clumsy bow, as if I had scarcely a right to exist before her. She saw
it, and scorned me, and took the wrong course, as we mostly do when we
despise another.

“Do I know your name, young man?” she asked, as if it were very
doubtful whether I possessed any name at all. “I seem to have heard of
you, but cannot say where.”

“In that case,” I said, with my spirit returning at the insolent
disdain of her eyes and voice, “the boy who came to fetch me has made
some mistake. No doubt you wished to see some other person. I beg you
to make no apologies.”

With another low bow, I began my retreat, and was very near securing
it; for she became too furious to condescend to speak. But two young
ladies, whom I had scarcely noticed, jumped up from their chairs, and
intercepted me.

“Mamma forgets names so,” said one of them, a little plain thing with a
mass of curly hair; “but you are Mr. Orchardson, I think, of Sunbury.
If so, it is you that mamma wants to speak to.”

“I am not Mr. Orchardson of Sunbury,” I answered; “my Uncle Cornelius
is the gentleman so known. I am Christopher Orchardson, who only helps
him in his business.”

“Then, Christopher Orchardson,” resumed their mother, as I came back
and looked at her quietly, “you seem to have very little knowledge of
good manners. Allow me to ask you what you are doing in this house?”

“I understood that I was sent for, ma’am; and I am waiting to know what
your pleasure is.” I saw the girls giggle, and glance at one another,
as I delivered this statement.

“None of your trifling with me, young man. What I insist upon knowing
is this. What right had you to enter my house, some hours ago, without
my knowledge, and to remain in it, without my permission? Don’t fence
with the question, but answer it.”

“That is easy enough,” I replied with my eyes full on hers, which
vainly strove to look down mine; “I came to this house, without asking
whose it was, to see Captain Fairthorn, with a little sketch of
something in which he had taken interest. The servant, or housekeeper,
told me to wait, while she went to look for her mistress. Then I met
Miss Fairthorn, whom I have had the pleasure of meeting several times
before; and she most kindly showed me to her father’s room. And I was
very glad to find him in good health. After a very pleasant time with
him, I was leaving the garden on my way home, when I was told that you
wished to see me. I was not rude enough to refuse, and that is why I am
in this house again.”

“You have made a fine tale of it, but not told the truth. Did you come
to my house to see the Professor? Or did you come rather to see his

“I came to this house to see Captain Fairthorn. But I hoped that I
might perhaps have the pleasure of seeing Miss Fairthorn also.”

“And what was your motive in wishing to see her? I have a right to
ask, as she is in my charge. I stand in the place of a mother to her,
whether she is grateful, or whether she is otherwise. What did you wish
to see her for?”

I was greatly at a loss to answer this. Not from any shame at the
affection, which was the honour and glory of my being, but from dread
of the consequences to my precious darling. She saw my hesitation, and
burst forth,—

“Do you think that I do not know all about it? You have had the gross
insolence to lift your eyes to a young lady far above you in every way.
You fancy that because she has no mother, and her father is a man of no
worldly wisdom, and of extravagant sentiments, a kind of philosopher
in short, you will be permitted to reduce her to your inferior rank in
life. What are you?—a small market-gardener, or something of that kind,
I believe.”

“You were kind enough to say just now,” I answered, “that you did not
know anything about me. Even my name was strange to you. I am not
ashamed of my business; and I lay no traps for any one.”

“Have you the insolence to refer to me?” Her guilty conscience caught
her here, and under its sting she grew so wild that I thought she would
have flown at me, though no thought of her had been in my words. “But
you are below my contempt, and I wonder that I even deign to speak to
you. And I will make short work of it. Go back to your spade, or your
heap of manure, or whatever it is you live in, and never dare to think
again of Miss Kitty Fairthorn. She is engaged to a gentleman of family,
and title, and large property; and I mean to have her married to him
very shortly. Go back to your manure-heap; I have done with you.”

“Not quite so easily as you think.” To her great amazement I approached
her, not only without terror, but with calm contempt. “You have a foul
scheme in hand, as is widely known, for selling a poor girl, whom you
have vilely misused, and starved for some years, and made her life a
misery; and you think you will be allowed to sell her to a reprobate
old man, who has not even gold enough to cover the blackness of his
character. As a girl she has borne your blows, as a woman she would
have to bear those of a cowardly and godless scoundrel. You like plain
speaking, and there it is for you. Do you think that God will allow
such crimes? I tell you, poor tyrant, that the right will conquer. Miss
Fairthorn shall have a happy home, with the affection and kindness of
which you have robbed her; and you—you shall suffer the misery you have

Now I had not meant to say a single word of this, and was thoroughly
astonished at my own strong language. Bitterly angry with myself as
well, for what I felt to be unmanly conduct (even under fiercest
provocation), when I saw the effect upon this haughty lady. It must
have been many years now, since any one had dared to show her thus
what she was like; for her strong will had swept black and white into
one—the one she chose to make of them. Weak indolence, and cowardice,
a thousandfold more common than the resolute will, had got out of her
way, until her way turned to a resistless rush.

She looked at me now, as if utterly unable to believe that her ears
could be true to her. Then glancing at one of her daughters, she said,
“Geraldine, this young man does not mean it. He has no idea what he is
talking about. Take him away, my dear; I feel unwell. I shall be able
to think of things, by-and-by. Euphrasia, run for the sal volatile, or
the Cognac in the square decanter. And then he may come back, and tell
me what he means.”

This strange turn of mind puzzled me, as much as my straightforward
speech had puzzled her. Dr. Sippets—our great man at Sunbury—said, when
I spoke of it many years afterwards, that he quite understood, and
could easily explain it. To wit, that with people of choleric habit,
the vessels of the brain become so charged up to a certain tension,
that if anything more—but I had better not try to put his hundred-tun
words into my pint pot. He is a choleric man himself; and his vessels
might become so charged as to vent themselves in a heavy charge to me.
It is enough to say, that when the lady sank, with a face as white as
death, upon the sofa, proper feeling told me to depart.

This I was doing, in a sad haze of mind; doubting whether duty did not
require that I should halt on the premises, until I had learned how
the sufferer passed through her trial. But now another strange thing
happened to me, and perhaps the very last I should have dreamed of. I
was lingering uneasily near the door, with many pricks of self-reproach
and even shame, when a slim figure glided out and came to me. Although
the night had quite fallen now, I could see that it was not my Kitty
who came out, but some one much shorter, and smaller altogether. With
great anxiety I went to meet her, fearing almost to hear fatal tidings;
for who can tell in such a case what may be the end of it?

“You need not be alarmed, Mr. Orchardson,” said a voice which I
recognized as that of Miss Jerry; “my mother is all right again, and
quite ready to have another turn at you, if you are anxious to come

“The Lord forbid!” I replied devoutly. “I would run into the hottest of
the brick-kilns yonder, rather than meet the good lady again. But I am
delighted that it is no worse. It was very kind of you to come and tell
me. My best thanks to you, Miss Geraldine.”

“It was not that at all,” she said with some hesitation; “I did not
come to set your mind at ease, though I thought that possibly you
might be waiting here; which is very good of you. But I came to say
how grateful I am for your behaviour. You have done a lot of good; I
cannot tell you half of it. Nobody ever dares to contradict mamma; that
is what makes her so much what she is. She is very kind and pleasant
at the bottom, I am sure. But she has such a very strong will of her
own; as a clever man said, when he tried to comfort my dear father many
years ago, such a ‘very powerful identity,’ that every one has always
given way before her, until she—until she thinks all the world is
bound to do it. You spoke very harshly to her, I know. Perhaps a real
gentleman would not have done it; and for the moment I hated you. But
she is so delightful to us ever since! We shall have a sweet time of
it, for at least a week. But won’t Miss Kitty catch it?”

Those last words gave me a bitter pang. This odd girl, who seemed to
have some good in her, spoke them, as I thought, with exultation, or at
any rate without any sign of sorrow. Her justice, like her mother’s,
stopped at home.

“If I have done you any good,” I said, with faint hopes of getting some
little myself, “do promise me one thing; I am sure you will. Try to be
kind to Miss Fairthorn, and lighten some little of the burden she has
to bear.”

“Oh, you don’t know her,” she answered, with a laugh. “You think she is
wonderful, I dare say. I can tell you Miss Kitty has a temper of her
own. She is awfully provoking, and she won’t be pitied. I believe she
hates Frizzy and me, just because we are our mother’s daughters. If you
ever marry her, you had better look out. However, I will bear with her,
as far as human nature can. And now I will say ‘Good-night.’”

She gave me her hand, which I did not expect; and I saw that she was
rather a pretty girl which I had not noticed in the room. She had fine
dark eyes, and her voice was much softer than that of her sister; and,
it seemed to me that she might come to good, if she got among good
people, and away from her terrible mother.



WHEN I gave Uncle Corny, as I was bound to do, a full account of that
day’s work, he was mightily pleased, and clapped me on the back for
having spoken so plainly to that haughty woman.

“But now you must make up your mind,” he said, “to have the door
slammed in your face, if ever you attempt to get a glimpse of your
sweetheart there. Poor thing, what a time of it she will have! What
puts my back up is to think that her own father lets her be knocked
about like that. She never tells him, you think, because it would only
get him into trouble, and do her no good. Well, she is a noble girl, if
that is the case. But he must know how she is treated, as I told you,
in fifty other ways,—badly dressed, half starved, or at any rate fed on
rice and suet-pudding, and kept in the schoolroom away from the others.
How was she dressed now? What clothes had she on?”

I answered that I really did not know; and this was the truth, though I
blamed myself for it. When first she began to be so much to me, I had
noticed how neat and becoming her cloak was, and her hat, and a little
tender muff, which held a still tenderer pair of hands. But now that
she was all the world to me, and more, I seemed to have no sense of her
apparel, but to be filled with herself alone, as if her existence came
into mine. I did not tell him that because he would have cried “Stuff!”

But he understood my meaning, so far as to tell me of a case he had
known some years ago. A friend of his had married a lovely girl, who
had not a penny to bless herself with, and he was most deeply attached
to her. But although he was very well off for money, and not at all
of a stingy turn, for a long time it never came into his head that
his wife had only two gowns, two bonnets, and one cloak. She was too
proud to ask him for money; and instead of doing that, went on and on,
wearing out all her poor things, until they were scarcely fit to be
looked at. And many bitter tears she shed, as she darned, and patched,
and let pieces in, convinced more and more, as the light shone through,
that her husband must hate her to keep her like that. And perhaps
it would have ended in the ruin of them both, for some villain was
making love to her, when, luckily a sister of his came to see them, and
scolded him roundly for his blind neglect. “Why, bless her heart!” he
cried, opening his eyes; “I never see Mary’s clothes—I see Mary.”

“Now mind you are not such a jackanapes as that;” my Uncle drew the
moral, as he rubbed his hands, for he loved to have his stories laughed
at; “when you have got your Kitty, and I don’t see why you should not,
be sure that you praise her dresses and bonnets; not quite so much
perhaps as you praise herself, but still every time you can think of
it. Women like that sort of thing, somehow. I can hardly tell you why;
for if any man praised my coat or my hat, I should be vexed with him,
unless it was to say that I had got them dirt-cheap. But perhaps the
reason is that a woman’s clothes are a part of her mind and her body
too, a sort of another self to her.”

“How on earth do you know such a lot about women?” I asked, though
I thought that he did not know much. “One would think you had been
married for forty years! What woman can have taught you all these

“Mind your own business,” my Uncle answered sharply. “You will have
quite enough to do with that, as things appear at present. You have
made play with this pretty girl, and you have booked your place with
her father. Also you have got over me, who meant to have nothing to do
with it. And you have given that hateful woman a Roland for her Oliver.
But I will go bail that you have no idea whose shoulders will bear the
brunt of it. Who should you say was the trump-card now?”

“The learned Professor,” I replied; “the man who could kill that
woman with a wire, if he were not so magnanimous. The man who knows
everything in this world, except how to manage his own household. He
will stand up for me, and I shall win.”

“So you shall, my boy; you are quite right there. But it won’t be done
through him, I can tell you; or you would have a precious time to wait.
It shall be done through a small market-gardener—as she had the cheek
to call me—and she may grind her teeth, and slap her husband. Very few
people know what I am; because I don’t care what they think of me. But
I see the proper thing to do, and I mean to begin to-morrow. Now go to
bed, and dream as you do all day. You’ll be no good to me, till you’ve
had too much of Kitty.”

Being weary in body and in mind, I slept until Tabby called out that
the breakfast was ready. For this I expected to be well upbraided,
as my uncle was always afoot with the sun; but to my surprise he was
not come home, and I kept his rasher hot for him. At last he came in,
and sat down without a word beyond his short “Good morning, Kit!” His
appetite was fine, and his face most cheerful; though his gray curls
appeared a little grimy, and his coat had a smell more peculiar than

“Shall have to go under the pump again,” he said, as he pushed away
his plate; “but it won’t matter now till dinner-time. That twitch does
make such a sticky smoke, with the sow-thistles whelmed down over it.
But the wind was the right way, and took it very level. Bless my soul,
how he did cough, and how he ran from one room to another! ’Twas enough
to kill American blight a’most, let alone what they call a ‘human.’
But it’s high time to rouse them up again, my lad; bring one of them
runner-sticks, and lend a hand. If he don’t bolt by dinner-time, we’ll
try a little sulphur. I would have done it sooner, if it had not been
for the Dutch Honeysuckle, and blue creeper.”

Wondering what this device could be, I took a kidney-bean stick and
followed him. He marched at a great pace, with a pitchfork on his
shoulder, down a long alley of pears and apples; on which, though the
leaves hung very late from the wetness of the season, the chill air of
some frosty mornings had breathed divers colours. Then we came into an
open break, which I had helped to plant with potatoes in the spring,
and here were a score of bonfires burning, or rather smoking furiously.
Beyond them was “Honeysuckle Cottage,” belonging to my uncle, and
standing at the north end of his grounds, against a lane which led to

This cottage had five windows facing us, and receiving the volleys of
foul gray smoke, as a smart south-west wind drove it; and the fires
being piled with diseased potato-haulm, of which there was abundance
in that bad year, as well as bottomed with twitch-grass, beth-wine,
cat’s-tail, and fifty other kinds of weed, and still more noxious
refuse, the reek was more than any nose could stand, when even a mild
puff strayed towards us. But the main and solid mass was rushing, in a
flood of embodied stench, straight into the windows of that peaceful
cot, penetrating sash and frame and lining. Once or twice as the cloud
wisped before the wind, we seemed to catch a brief glimpse of some
agitated mortal, holding up his hands in supplication, or wringing
them, and applying them in anguish to his nose.

“Pile on some more, Bill, and stir them up again,” shouted Uncle
Corny, with his pitchfork swinging in the thick of it. “Agricultural
operations must not be suspended to suit the caprice of individuals,—as
the County-court judge said, when Noakes tried to stop me from carting
manure near his parlour-window. If old Harker won’t hearken, well make
him sniff, eh? See the joke, Selsey Bill?”

Selsey Bill saw it, after deep reflection, and shook his long sides
with a longer guffaw. “If a’ don’t sniff at this, a’ must have quare
nostrils”—he was wheezing himself, as he clapped on another great
dollop of rottenness, and stirred it; “I could never have bided it two
minutes; though the Lord hathn’t made me too partiklar. Sure us’ll
vetch ’un out this time, Maister. Here a’ coom’th, here a’ coom’th.
Lookey see!”

Following his point we descried a little man, timidly opening the
cottage door, and apparently testing the smells outside, to compare
them with those he was quitting. He glanced at the bonfires, and shook
his fist wildly; then threw his skirt over his head, and made off, as
if he had smelled quite enough of this world.

“Run and get the key, Bill,” my uncle cried, as soon as he could speak
for laughing; “lock the door, and bring the key to me. We’ll send for
the fire-engine by-and-by, and wash down the front, and then put your
wife in, and scrub the whole place out. Beat abroad the fires, men,
and throw some earth upon them. That’s what I call something like an
ejectment. The old rogue has paid no rent since Lady Day; though he
had it dirt cheap at three and six a week, and me to pay the rates and
taxes. Come, you shall have a pint of beer all round. I am sure you
want something to take the taste out.”

As we went home, to have a good wash, and change our coats, I learned
all the meaning of this strong measure, and felt no more pity for the
tenant evicted. He had occupied this cottage for some seven years now,
and although he lived so close to us and on our land, scarcely any one
had exchanged ten words with him. He was of a morose and silent nature,
living all alone, though he had some money, and never going out of
doors when he could help it. His name was Ben Harker, and throughout
the village his nickname was “Old Arkerate;” for when anything was said
to him that he could pick a hole in, if it were only a remark about
the weather, he would always say—“No. That isn’t arkerate.” It was said
that he had lost a considerable fortune, before he came to Sunbury, by
some inaccuracy in a will, or title-deeds, and thence he had taken to
challenge the correctness of even the most trivial statement. My uncle
had been longing for months to recover possession of his own premises;
but old Harker took advantage of the obstacles richly provided by
English law in such a case, and swore he would never go out without a
law-suit. But he had never spent a halfpenny on repairs, though he had
it so cheap through his promises; and by his own default he was thus
smoked out, and the key was in the landlord’s pocket.

Mrs. Selsey Bill, mother of seventeen living children, was very fat and
stumpy—as behoves a giant’s wife—and was blest with a cold in her head
just now, which redeemed all her system from prejudice. The greatest
philosophers assure us that all things—if there be anything—are good
or bad, simply as we colour them in our own minds—that is to say, if
we have minds—and to Mrs. Bill Tompkins the stench of that house was
as sweet as the perfumes of Araby. She flung up the windows, from the
force of habit, and not from “æsthetic preference,” and she scrubbed
away with soda, and fuller’s earth, and soft soap, and bristle, and
cocoa-fibre. And the next day, as soon as we had finished dinner (which
we never left for nightfall, as if it were a burglary), my uncle said,
“let us go and see how that place looks, after Old Arkerate has had to
cut and run.”

When we got there, fat little Mrs. Tompkins was scrubbing almost as
hard as ever. It is quite wrong to talk as if fat people cannot work.
Many of them can, and can even carry on, by drawing on their own
resources, when a lean person having hollow places down her begins to
pant, and has no stuff to fill them out. She drew her breath a little,
as she got up from the bucket; but neither of her hands went to her
waist, because there was no such place to go to. She had three of the
young ones strapped down on the floor of the room she had not yet
grappled with; for her husband was of an ingenious mind, and necessity
had taught him invention. Mrs. Selsey Bill stood up and faced us; she
thought that we were come to say she had not done enough.

“Honourable gents,” she began with the lead, as women love to do, “it
don’t look much; and you might think you got the worst of one and
ninepence for a day, with the days going on for dusk at five o’clock.
But when you has to find your own soap and flannels—”

“I think you have done wonders, Mrs. Tompkins;” my uncle made answer
with his pleasant smile. “If I only got the best of every bargain like
this, I need never be out of elbows, ma’am. Why the stairs are as white
as a scraped horse-radish. May we go up and see the view from the best
bedroom? Not if it will upset any of your clever doings. You are the
mistress now; and we take your orders.”

With a laugh, which challenged our criticism (for no man, except a
sailor, knows the rudiments of scrubbing), she loosed for us a cord
which she had tied across, lest any Selsey baby might break bonds, and
crawl upstairs; and presently we stood in a pretty little bedroom, with
an ample but rickety window, facing southwards. The room was not too
lofty, and I might have knocked my hat against the ceiling, if I had
not doffed it. But Uncle Corny, being not so tall though wider, had
plenty of head-room, and asked what man could want more. And when I
looked out of the window, I agreed that a man deserved less, who could
not be pleased with this.

For Honeysuckle Cottage stood at the very highest corner of all his
pleasant fruit-grounds; and I was much surprised, having never been
inside this house before, at the rich view of gardening ever varied,
and of fair land and water beyond the fruit-alleys, which shone in the
soft spread of sunshine far away. Over the heads of countless trees,
and betwixt their coats of many colours, matched by the motherly hands
of autumn, the broad reaches of the flooded Thames, with many a bend
of sheen and shadow, led the eye to dwell with pleasure, and the heart
with wonder. And across the wide water, sloping meadows, streaked and
rounded with hedge and breastland, spread a green footing for the dark
and distant hills.

“Let me see, to-day is Friday—an unlucky day, Kit, for you to come
first to the house. If I had thought of that, we might have waited for
to-morrow. But it can’t be helped now; and I am not superstitious.
On Monday I’ll have Joe and Jimmy Andrews in, and put all these
window-frames and doors to rights. Then we’ll have Tilbury from
Hampton, to see to the papering and painting, and all that. By the end
of the week, we’ll have it snug and tidy. I have sent all old Harker’s
traps after him to-day. They tell me he has taken that tumbledown barn
of Osborne’s, over by Halliford. I suppose I may whistle for my back
rents. I ought to have distrained upon his sticks; but I laughed so,
when I saw how he bolted, that I could not do it. But you’ll have to
pay an improved rent, my lad. You can’t have it under five shillings a
week, and cheap enough at that, I can tell you.”

“Why, what do you mean?” I asked. “I don’t want a house; and if I did,
how am I to keep it up? I haven’t got a sixpence to call my own.”

“Then a pretty fellow you are, to make up to Captain Fairthorn’s
daughter! Where did you intend to put her, I should like to know? But
we’ll make that all right, between you and me and the bedpost. I have
got a little nest-egg of your mother’s money for you, and a heel-tap of
your father’s. Didn’t you know why I smoked that old rogue out? Why,
that this might be a little home for Kit and Kitty.”



IT is a bad thing for any man to be always beating his own bounds, and
treading the track of his own grounds, and pursuing the twist of his
own affairs—though they be even love affairs—as a dog spins round to
catch his own tail. Under the hammer of incessant thought, and in the
hot pincers of perpetual yearning, I was getting as flat as a horseshoe
twice removed, when Sam Henderson gave a boy twopence to slip into
our grounds, when my uncle’s back was turned, and put into my hand
an envelope addressed to “Samuel Henderson, Esquire, The Paddocks,
Halliford, Middlesex.” At first I thought, in my slow way, that his
object was to let me see what deference he had won in racing circles;
and I smiled at the littleness of the man. But the boy, who was shaking
in his ventilated shoes, with dread of Uncle Corny, said—“’Tain’t
that side; turn ’un over.” I obeyed his instructions, and beheld in
pencil—“Come down the lane a bit. I have news for you, important.”

What mortal, dwelling wholly on his own affairs, would not have
concluded that this concerned him, on his own account, and unselfishly?
I hurried on my coat, which had been thrown off for a job of winter
pruning, and in less than two minutes I had turned the corner and was
face to face with the mighty Sam.

“All right, old fellow,” he said as coolly as if I had come to recover
a loan. “You needn’t turn a hair. It is not about your Kitty, but my
skittish little Sally—Sally Chalker. You know I told you all about her,
the daughter of the old bloke down at Ludred.”

“Oh, I remember now,” I answered, with a sudden chill of
disappointment. “I might have known that it was not for me you were in
such a precious hurry. You were very wise not to come into our place.
My uncle is a man of short measures.”

“A man of uncommonly short measures. He will get fined some fine day,
I’m afraid.” Sam laughed wonderfully at his own wit. “But I know he
don’t want me to see his little tricks. Don’t bluster, beloved Kit; we
all do it, and we respect one another all the more for it. Free trade
has turned John Bull into Charley Fox. I can feel for you, my boy; for
now there’s a foreign rogue come poaching on my preserves at Ludred.
And he doesn’t know how many legs make a horse.”

Sam tapped his own dapper and well-curved legs with a light gold-headed
riding-whip, and his favourite mare, who was under the charge of a lad
down the lane, gave a whinny to him. “There’s nothing she don’t know,”
said Sam; “and her name it is Sally.”

I was not sure which of the two fillies—for I knew that he called
his sweetheart one, and her name too was “Sally”—my friend was thus
commending. But I rose to the situation, and said—“Let us go, and rout
the fellow out.”

“I was sure you would stand by a brother Briton,” cried Sam, shaking
hands very heartily; “and you won’t find me forget it, Kit, when old
Crumbly Pot comes back again. I am keeping a look-out for you there,
as I gave you my word to do. It has been kettles to mend, I am told,
in the fen-land where he hails from. I know a Jew fellow who brought
him to book, and was very nearly quodding him. He won’t be back this
side of Christmas, unless my friend is a liar, and then I shall do you
as good a turn as you are going to do me now. Can you make it fit to
come to-morrow? I’ll put my Sally in the spider, and call for you about
ten o’clock. You can tell old Punnets, that you want to see your Aunt
Parslow about important business—for important it is and no mistake.
Think of a dirty Frenchman nobbling sweet Sally Chalker, and all her

Old Punnets—as he insolently called my uncle—was glad enough that
I should pay a visit to my aunt, or rather my mother’s aunt, Miss
Parslow, who was said to be worth at least 10,000_l._, as well as a
very nice house, and large garden, and three or four meadows by the
river Mole.

“You should never neglect such folk,” he said; “you have no proper
sense of the plainest duty. She has only one relation as near as you
are, and he has got plenty of tin of his own. You might cut him out
easy enough, if you tried, and now is the nick of time for it. Hannah
Parslow is as proud as Punch, I know; and if you can only put it to
her, with a little of the proper grease, of course, that your mother’s
son is considered unfit to marry a young lady, because he cannot cut a
shine,—who can tell what she might do for you? She doesn’t spend half
of her income, I know. I was thinking of it only the other night. And
she might allow you two hundred a year, without stinting a pinch of
Keating’s powder. You love dogs, and dogs love you. Half the dogs in
the village come to see you home. Make up to Jupiter, and Juno, and
the other bow-wows she has taken to her bosom, and you’ll never want
my thirty shillings a week, nor yet the little balance of your father
and mother’s money. You go and see her, Kit. Don’t lose a day. You may
accept a lift from that fast Sam Henderson; but throw him over, as soon
as you have got it.”

Now, this little speech was as like as two peas to Uncle Corny’s
nature. He had never said a word about meaning to give me any one pound
ten a week—though Heaven knows that I was worth it; for let the weather
be what it would, there was I making the best of it. On the contrary,
I had very seldom put into the purse (which I carried more for the
husk than kernel) so much as five shillings on a Sunday morning,
which was my uncle’s particular time for easing his conscience about
me. Of course I had my victuals, and my clothes to a certain extent,
and the power to pay his bills (which made people offer me something
sometimes); also I could talk as if the place belonged to me; but
people knew better for at least three miles away. So that his talking
of thirty shillings proved, without another word on his part, his high
and holy views of marriage.

And again it was like him, to try to put me up to get something good
out of good Aunt Parslow. Whatever I could get from her would mean
so much relief for the Orchardson firm—as he often called us in his
prouder times; though if I had asked for a penny of the proceeds, he
would have banged his big desk upon my knuckles. But do not let me seem
to say a word against him; for a better uncle never lived; and I felt
his generosity very deeply, until I began to think of it.

Few things have been more successful yet, and very few have been better
managed, than that drive of ours to Leatherhead. Possibly Sam was a
luckier fellow than myself; and I think it likely, because he was less
deserving. Not that there was much harm about him, except a kind of
laxity in talk, and a strained desire to be accounted sharp, and a
strong ambition to rise in the world, without cleaning the steps ere he
mounted them. But he showed a fine heart by his words just now—although
he was much ashamed of it—and the pace we were going at brought it out,
for a brisk air stirs up the best part of us.

“Ain’t she a stepper?” he said, as we crossed Walton bridge, and dashed
through the flood-water, for the high-road was not made up then; “wet
or dry is all alike to Sally. That’s the way to go through the world,
my boy. Julius Cæsar crossed the river here; and I have got a yearling
named after him. What makes it all the kinder on my part is that he
hasn’t got Latin in his family. How proud the old chap would have been
for me to go out of the custom so! It will set a whole lot of the
Emperors going, if the colt cuts the shine I expect of him.”

Knowing nothing about the turf, and caring very little, I let him
rattle on about pedigrees, and strains of double blood, and Waxy, and
Whalebone, and I know not what, as bad as the Multiplication table; and
I wondered that such stuff should form his discourse, when he should
have been full of young ladies. Even the beauty of the country, which
was more than enough to delight the eyes and hold the mind still with
pleasure, seemed nothing to Sam beyond—“Yes, very pretty. Nice bit of
training-ground up there. That’s the sort of grass that suits milk

At last, as we came within a mile of our mark, and followed the fair
valley of the river, I brought him to the business of the day, having
heard enough of Spider-wheels, and flyers, and so forth; and requiring
to know what he expected of me. We had gone at such a pace, up hill
and down, scarcely ever varying from one long stride, which left every
other “trap” far in the lurch, that but for my boyish remembrance of
the place, I could scarcely have believed that we were almost in the

“Fifteen or five,” he said, “that’s her pace; there’s no halfway house
for Sally. She walks a good five. Walk is the word, old gal. Well, all
you have got to do, Kit, is just this. I put up at the ‘Dolphin,’ and
you make a call, with your best gloves on, and your hat brushed up, at
Valley-view House, where your good aunt lives. You have not seen her
for years. So much the better. Tell her that a distinguished friend
of yours, especially esteemed by your uncle, and well known in the
best London circles, has important business in the town; and that you
took occasion to pay your respects, where they have been due so long.
Admire her dogs, and all that sort of thing; and when she insists on
your staying to lunch, regret very deeply that you cannot leave your
distinguished friend, etc. Then if she is any good, she will say—‘Do
you think he would waive formality?’ and so on. And you say—‘If he is
not engaged at Lord Nethersole’s, I will endeavour to fetch him.’ I
shall happen to be lounging up the hill, and shall pull out my watch
and be doubtful. But the attractions of the spot are too many for me. I
throw over his lordship, and get over the old lady.”

I promised to do my best towards this, but without any fictions
concerning him; for his best chance lay, as I told him, in moderation
and simplicity. For my aunt, according to my remembrance, was rather a
shrewd old lady; and Sam had shown some little sense of this, in the
choice of what he called his toggery. All rich adornments, and gorgeous
hues, had been for once discarded; his clothes were all of a quiet
gray, and his tone had subsided from the solar to the lunar rainbow. In
short, he looked more like a gentleman than I had ever known him look
before; and seeing what a fine young man he was, I felt heartily glad
that he had fixed his affections where they could not imperil mine.

When I entered the gate of Valley-view, nine or ten small dogs came
scampering out, all giving tongue, and all making believe to be born
for one end, namely my end. There were pugs, and Skye-terriers, and
Blenheim-spaniels, and wiry-coated terriers, and Italian greyhounds,
and little ridiculous toy-dogs fit for a child’s Noah’s ark, and I
know not what else, but no dog of the name of “Silence.” “What a pack
of curs!” I said rather gruffly, and with a gesture of contempt, for I
never did hear such a medley of barks. As dogs are the most humorous
creatures in the world, they immediately looked at one another and
laughed, each applying my remark to his neighbours. If they had been
curs, they would have felt it more; being all of fine breeding, they
took it lightly, as I said it, for I had no real meaning to offend
them. Then, a great deal more quickly than we settle matters, they
referred the whole question to a grand old pug, with his face pulled up
short, like a plaited blind, by the cords of disgust at the tricks of
mankind, and lots of little pimples, like a turbot’s moles, upon it.
As a chairman of committee he came up to me, reserving his stump in
a very strict line, till my character passed through the test of his
nose. Then he gave a little doubtful trepidation to his tail, and after
another sniff, a very hearty wag; and with one accord all the doggies
set off to the house to announce that an honest dog was coming.

Miss Parslow was inclined, as appeared thereafter, to attach more
importance to the verdict of her dogs, even as a Roman admiral should
have consulted his holy chickens. When the dogs came to say that they
believed me to be safe, their mistress put them all into their own room
and came out to the porch to meet me. She knew me at once, though I
might have forgotten her, except for a great event in my life, when she
gave me the first sovereign I ever possessed. Being a small and slim
lady, she rested her head upon the upper pocket of my waistcoat, which
seemed to be an excellent omen.

“Oh, how you do take after your dear mother!” she exclaimed, with a
genial tear or two; “you are not like an Orchardson, my dear boy, but
a Parslow, a Parslow all over! Why have you kept away from Valley-view
till now?”

This was a difficult question to answer, and therefore I naturally
asked another. “How are you getting on, my dear aunt? And will it put
you out that I should come like this? I wrote last night, but it may
have been too late.”

“Oh, the posts are always wrong. Come and sit here by the fire. We
shall have a sharp winter; I am sure of that. _Jupiter_ knows the
weather as well as if he made it. Now come and tell me all about your
own affairs.”

At first I was not at all inclined to do that, preferring to talk
about hers, and desiring some knowledge of her character and opinions
before I began to spread forth my own. But she took the lead of me, and
contrived to get out of me all about Uncle Corny, and everybody else
I had to do with, and even the whole of my hopes and fears concerning
the main object of my life. For the old can always pump the young, when
they know the right way to hold the handle.

“I cannot see where the presumption is,” she said as she took my hand
and placed it in one of hers and patted it; “your mother was Annie
Parslow, as sweet a young lady as any Miss Fairthorn. Her father would
have been Lord Mayor of London if he had only lived long enough. The
Parslows were in the tea line, which is equal to almost any. It is true
that she dropped several grades in life by marrying George Orchardson—”

“And Miss Fairthorn’s friends, if she ever does it, will say that she
dropped several grades in life by marrying Kit Orchardson.” I felt that
I had her there; but she would not see it.

“Don’t talk nonsense, Kit. The case is wholly different. You may be
counted as half a Parslow, while nobody knows what she is. And you must
not consider what her friends will say, but your own, who are sensible
people. You have acted very wisely in coming over to tell me all about
this affair. I am sorry that the girl is so poor through her father’s
stupid carelessness. You know that I like your Uncle Cornelius,
although he is such a queer character. One of the most obstinate men on
earth, and nearly all men are obstinate. But he is apt to put things
off. He is always waiting for something else to be ready. I shall pay
him a visit as soon as Mr. Parker’s fly has got its new cushions in,
and his bay horse recovered from his lameness. Then we will settle
something about you. I never let the grass grow below my feet. I shall
make your Uncle Corny come to book. I am quite convinced in my own mind
that he has been keeping all these years a nice little lump of your
father’s money, as well as your dear mother’s property. No Parslow was
ever a beggar yet. There was none of them but had a silver teapot, as
was only decent in the business. And most of them could fill it with
bank-notes, though I’m not saying that your mother could. Dear me, what
a dreadful to-do there was when she ran away with George Orchardson!
My dear brother vowed he would never forgive her, although she was his
favourite child; so upright, and fair, and so ladylike, and cheeks like
damask roses! You never see such a sweet face now. All their education
is to learn to stare, and all their polish is like a brass knocker’s.
What they all want is a good stepmother, to starve and to slap their
ears out of them. That may have made your Kitty nicer than you can
expect to find them now. If I were a young man I wouldn’t marry any
girl who had not been ten years under a strong stepmother. Why, how
many more times is that young man to lounge up and down the road over
there? He is very like the one who comes from somewhere near you, and
has taken a fancy to Sally Chalker.”

“My dear aunt,” I said, “your delightful conversation has driven him
out of my head altogether. It must be Mr. Henderson who drove me over,
a sporting man, but a landlord, and a very fashionable fellow. He is
waiting for me to go back with him, no doubt, and he will not take the
liberty of ringing your bell. I must not keep him any more. Good-bye,
dear aunt.”

“Do you think that I would let you go without a morsel? We shall have
luncheon in about five minutes. Ask your friend to join us if he will
oblige me. Oh, I do like a shy man, he is getting so scarce!”



ALL Leatherheadians used to admit, and could show good reason for doing
so, that my great-aunt Parslow was the cleverest woman, as well as the
most respectable in the place. But even her abilities were hardly taxed
to find in my friend Sam Henderson any large amount of that element of
shyness, with which she had endowed him through the window. His merits
were rather inclined to dispense with any bridal veil of modesty, and
his charms never mantled themselves in moss, as the coy rose attracts
by retiring. But I was pleased to find that he behaved much better than
any of his best friends could have hoped; for he dropped all slang, and
soared into lofty places among much more nobility than I had ever heard
of. And I wondered a little at my aunt’s familiarity with all the great
names he was so friendly with; for she never said “No,” but nodded
intimately, whenever he presumed that she knew the Earl of something,
or even the Duke of anything. I could not resist the conclusion that
the Parslows had been in the peerage, and lost it; probably through
excess of greatness, and consequent peril to the throne itself.

When Sam had told scandals enough of great people, to keep all Ludred
in a ferment for a month—though I noticed with surprise his delicacy
and deference to the fact (if to no other) that he was speaking in the
presence of a maiden lady—he played another card, even more effective;
he asked, as the very greatest favour he could think of, the honour
of an introduction to the noblest circle of dogs now existing in the

“Perhaps you will regret it, Mr. Henderson,” Aunt Parslow replied, with
a smile and a blush, for she had a very pretty colour still, which
had varied with some of his narratives. “My dogs are perfect little
wizards and witches. They took to my nephew, because he is a Parslow,
and perhaps because he is so innocent. But you have seen so much of the

“Yet kept myself quite untainted by it.” He spoke with such gravity
that I was obliged to turn away. “Next to the society of accomplished
ladies, I enjoy that of horses, and of thorough-bred dogs. With a
very long interval between, of course. But I scarcely ever meet an
accomplished lady. What a lucky mark I must put to this day! Oh, if I
could only show you my little Tim! He can stand on his tail, and sing
‘Rule Britannia,’ and beat time with all his four legs in the air. But
compared to your dogs he is nothing but a cur! What beauties! Why, Miss
Parslow, I will never trust my eyes again.”

“Yes, they are very pretty, and as good as any children, or a great
deal better, I might say. _Jupiter_, don’t growl, sir. _Cleopatra_,
take your teeth out of Mr. Henderson’s boot. _Vulcan_, and _Venus_, and
_Mercury_—oh dear!”

At a signal from _Jupiter_, the ancient pug, all the pets had made
a rush at the bewildered Sam, and a chorus of yells arose as he was
obliged, in self-defence, to kick at them. Then they rallied in a
body round the corner of the side-board, snarling and showing their
little white teeth, with their bristles erect and their eyes full of
fire, bravely encouraging one another for a still fiercer charge at
the stranger. And he would have had the worst of it, or killed some of
the tiny ones, if I had not spied a light whip in the lobby, and given
Master _Jupiter_ a crack on his fat sides, which made him bolt with a
howl, and all his army followed suit.

“Oh, how shall I punish them? Do forgive me. I never knew them do such
a thing before. And I thought them such excellent judges of character!
How could I imagine that they would ever fly at you! And they have
pulled down the cloth, and broken two decanters that belonged to my
dear mother. But that is nothing, Mr. Henderson, compared with the
shocking fright they have given you. How can I ever thank you for not
killing them?”

Then Henderson, with the skill of Hannibal, turned his defeat into
victory. “What plucky little chaps they are!” he said; “I did all I
could to put them in a rage, on purpose to test their breeding. Perhaps
you saw me flash this pin at them. If anything drives a small dog wild,
it is to catch him in the eyes with a large carbuncle. But I got the
worst of it, and serve me right. I only hope I may not have hurt any of
the darlings.”

“You are magnanimity itself, my dear sir;” Aunt Parslow glanced shyly
at his very good trousers, which would never be quite so good again;
“the main point is whether you are hurt. Even a very little dog, you

“Miss Parslow, a dog, unless really rabid, is not a quarter so venomous
as a cat. If I had been attacked like that by cats, I could not have
dared to show a bit of mercy, even if they had been prime favourites of

“Oh, I cannot bear cats. I am so glad you draw that most just
distinction. Dogs are so noble and generous, so candid and loving,
and chivalrous. They showed that, even when they did their best to
bite you. But a cat is so stealthy, and crawling, and crafty, and I
might even say bloodthirsty. Next to my dogs, I love my birds, the
dear little things that come and sing, even in the—not by any means
an elegant expression—of winter. Not a robin could live here, until I
had my doggies. But that sounds like the front-door bell! Kit, would
you oblige me by just seeing who it is? Jenny and Biddy are engaged,
I know. What a very strange thing, if it should be Miss Chalker! Of
course, you never heard of our belle Chalker, Mr. Henderson.”

“Madam, it appears to me that you are all belles here.” Sam bowed as he
spoke, and contrived to convey me a wink as I left the room, which told
me that the very strange thing had been brought to pass by post, or
possibly by telegram.

When I opened the door, I saw a very pretty girl, but no more to be
compared with my darling Kitty, than a tulip with a lily of the valley.
Although it was close upon winter now, she had a striped parasol, which
I detest; and her velvet hat (turned down over one ear, and turned up
at the other) had two kingfisher’s wings stuck crosswise, and between
them a gorgeous topaz humming-bird. You might look at my Kitty fifty
times; and if any one asked you how she was dressed, you would have to
say, “I have not the least idea,” if you happened not to be a woman.
But this young lady’s attire compelled attention, and perhaps deserved

“Oh, I beg your pardon,” she said very nicely, and giving me a smile
which made two dimples; “but I thought that Miss Parslow might he
disengaged. I thought I would look in, as I was going down the town.
But I will not intrude, if she has visitors.”

She made some difficulty about coming in, as if she were not bent
upon doing so; but I told her, with a look, which she feigned not to
understand, that I should never be forgiven if I allowed her to depart.
Then the lady of the house came out, and brought her in, and introduced
her to both visitors. “Oh, I know Mr. Henderson, a great friend of my
father’s; I am so glad that he knows you, Aunt Parslow. I am sure he
admires your lovely view.”

Now, this was not exactly to my liking. What right had she to call my
Aunt Parslow hers? If I ever met any one free from petty jealousy, I
believe it is the one I see while shaving. But ever since Sam Henderson
came in at my aunt’s door, I, who had been getting on so well till
then, seemed to be no better than a nobody. He had made himself the
hero of the hour, and played first fiddle, and forced his way into her
best graces, by working on her vanity, and social yearnings, and family
pride, till I quite expected that he would declare himself to be a
Parslow, and entitled to the silver teapot. And now here was this girl,
who had made up her mind, as I could see plainly, to be Mrs. Sam ere
long, daring to address my wealthy relative as her own Aunt Parslow!

“Kit, you don’t look very well,” said the lady of the house, after
much chatter had been indulged in; “a little change will do you good
perhaps. I suppose you are always up an apple-tree at home. Would you
like to come with me through my long garden, and give me your advice
about one or two things? The view up the valley is very lovely, and so
perfectly rustic. Jenny will have tea ready, when we come back.”

To this we all agreed with great pleasure, and my aunt contrived to let
Sam and his Sally fall behind, quite out of our sight among the trees
and shrubs, while she took my arm, and let me carry her camp-stool.
_Jupiter_ alone of the dogs came with us, for she scarcely went even to
church without him; and he certainly was a clever and amusing fellow,
full of information, and yet always adding to it. He looked at me
with great respect, and not a shadow of resentment for the very solid
whack I had bestowed upon him. His black muzzle, big forehead, large
deep eyes, crow’s feet of experience, and furrows of philosophy, were
relieved of their austerity, every now and then, by the gentle waggery
of his corkscrew tail.

“Now I will show you as lovely a piece of rich English landscape as
ever you saw;” the old lady said, as we turned a grassy corner. “I
have often thought of having a bower made here; but perhaps that would
tend to Cockneyfy it. Let me have the stool, Kit, and you sit on that
stump. The view from the house is very beautiful, but this beats it,
because it shows another bend, and perhaps the very prettiest bend
of all the valley. You ought to be here in May, Kit, when the lilacs
and laburnums, and the wild-broom, and the apple-blossom, and the
soft green of the trees along the winding river—don’t talk to me of
Devonshire after that. I have never been there; but I won’t believe it.”

I admired the view, which was very nice indeed, and very prettily
varied in its way. At the same time, I could not help thinking that
some of the broad reaches of the Thames, and the long spread of meadows
with the slanting sun, and the cattle too sleek to care a flip for
flies, and the trees, and the islands and the glassy quiet—such as we
have round our way—were much more likely to do a man good (which must
be the thing they were made for) than all the sharp turns of a pretty
little stream which our river receives without knowing it.

“You are right, my dear nephew,” replied my dear aunt, when I had
expressed opinions not exactly as above; “it is indeed a large and
noble sight. But I fear that those two young people behind us will be
looking all the time at one another, and perhaps never know that they
are in a valley. Mr. Henderson is a very pleasant young man, so far
as I can judge, and a clever one, likely to make his own way in the
world, with the help of all the very great friends he has. But is he to
be thoroughly depended on? Has he the strict principle, and downright
honesty, and love of domestic life, without which no marriage can be
truly happy? I have a great regard for young Miss Chalker; and though
her father belongs to another grade of life, and one with which I have
but little sympathy, I believe him to be a very upright man, and his
heart is bound up with his only child. She has no mother, you must
understand; and I will not lend myself to anything, for which I could
not answer to her father and myself.”

My aunt fixed her keen grey eyes upon me, and her white hair added
to their force and truth. For the first time I felt that I had acted
rashly, and by no means rightly in the matter, as she put it. And that
she put it sensibly, and honestly, and kindly, was too evident for my
self-content. I should not have yielded to Sam’s overtures, or at any
rate, I should not have involved her in the case, without being far
more sure than I was at present of his good qualities. I answered as
truthfully as I could, which is the only right thing to do, however it
may end. And I felt that the end might be my disgrace with her.

“Aunt Parslow, I know very little of Sam Henderson. That is to say, I
have known him from a boy, but never been intimate with him. In our
village he is considered rather ‘fast.’ But we are a very steady-going
lot; and any one who deals at all with racing matters, is sure to
get that reputation with us. I have never heard anything against his
honesty; if I had, I should not be with him, until it was disproved. I
think that he is really attached to Miss Chalker; but whether he would
be a good husband for her, is a great deal more than I can say. You
ladies are the best judges of such matters. If you can give him a good
word, do. But it must depend entirely on your own judgment. For as I
said before, I do not know him at all thoroughly.”

“I am not very sanguine about it,” said my aunt, whose eyes had never
left mine, while I spoke; “and I shall take good care that, if they
meet again here, it shall be with her father’s knowledge. There is one
thing to be said, that they both belong to the same class in life, and
are likely therefore to understand one another’s ways. The same cannot
be said of you, my dear; and your love is a much more romantic affair,
and likely, I fear, to run no smooth course. There I will help you all
I can, and my advice will be of great service to you. Also if you want
a little money, you know where to come for it. And that reminds me
that you may want some now. Your Uncle Orchardson is a man, I believe,
of great integrity and fine principle; but I know that he objects
very strongly to parting with any of the means God has given him. If
you are obliged to run away with your Kitty, to save her from an old
reprobate,—and it may come to that, though I dislike such things—what
does your uncle propose to do for you? He ought to do something

“And so he will, something very handsome. He has promised to pay me
thirty shillings a week for my services in his business, and to let
us a cottage at five shillings a week, which must be worth seven and

“Exactly like him, the old curmudgeon! Well, I won’t say yet what I
will do, because I have not even seen your Kitty, and I have of course
so many claims upon me. But here is a ten-pound note, to save you from
making your uncle unhappy by asking him to advance you a trifle; and
if you want another you can have it any day. I am pleased with you,
Christopher, because I think you have told me the truth about all these
affairs, as well as about Mr. Henderson; and _Jupiter_, who is the
greatest of all judges, has pronounced most strongly in your favour.
Now let us go and look for that sporting pair. Quite enough of such
proceedings in my garden.”



Although there was a little help of moonlight, Sam drove home very
carefully; for the more a man has to do with horses, the better he
knows where the risk is. And I saw that his speech about Sally’s speed,
as a power that could not be modified, was a speech, and nothing
more. He set me down at my uncle’s door, with many warm thanks for my
kindness, and a strong assurance that he should now go in and win. But
my uncle was not so well pleased; for he had very little love for Sam,
and much hatred at being kept out of his bed.

“I suppose you don’t want any supper,” he grumbled; “if you do, you
must go and get what you can find. Your Aunt Parslow is a wealthy
woman, but not the one to feed you as I do. I’ll be bound she has
sent you quite empty away. There’s a bit of cold hock of bacon in the

I told him that I had been fed like a prince, which only increased
his ill humour. “She wants you to go and do her trees for nothing. I
understand that old woman;” he said, as he gave me an inch of tallow
candle. “But after real turtle and Champagne, you will be able to make
something out of this. It came by the girl who is old Tabby’s niece, or
cousin, or grandmother, or something. The footman, no doubt, was too
grand to come down here. Don’t bother me with it. I want my nightcap.”

He gave me a letter, which he had opened, and which was addressed in a
crabbed hand to “Mr. Cornelius Orchardson, Market Gardener, Sunbury;”
and when he was gone, I read as follows:—

“Miss Coldpepper presents her compliments to Mr. Orchardson, and will
be much obliged if he will send his nephew Christopher to the Hall at
ten o’clock to-morrow morning, as Miss Coldpepper has something to say
to him.”

My conscience being in a dreadful state of nervousness and discomfort,
without anybody to relieve it to, or any one to put it on, I wondered
and wondered what this could mean; till my dreams, like a thatcher’s
pole, twisted it into a thousand ropes of many-coloured stuff and
stream. And when the morning came at last, I could not set about my
work, until I had learned what Tabby Tapscott thought about this new
surprise. She, in her provoking ways, pretended to know everything, but
would only shake her head and mutter, and tell me to insure my life.
At last I saw that she knew nothing, and the only comfort that I could
find was to tell her that she should never know, because she was an old

It was a dull and foggy morning, with a gray rime on the grass, and
dead leaves hanging tipped with wet, and dribbles of puddles along the
walk doubting whether to freeze or flow, and the whole air reeking
with that Job’s comfort, which means that there is much worse to come.
I buttoned my coat and strode more briskly, though going upon a loth
errand, you may know.

When they showed me in at the tradesman’s door—for I then looked up to
dignities, which exist by being looked up to—a strange and unaccustomed
thing upset all the rally of my conscience. _Regulus_, the foremost of
all beings in a well regulated household, came down the passage, at a
pace which spoke nine volumes for his digestion, though his lips were
clouted with fine cream; and instead of taking a nip at me, he threw
up his head, as if he would have taken his hat off, if he wore one,
and indulged in a bark of welcome, which went ringing back to the hall
itself. Then he cut a caper round my feet, and with the innumerable
laughter of his tail, fell fawning, and begged but a word from me. I
have often seen men of small self-respect do that sort of thing to
great personages, but I knew that this dog was full of self-respect,
and had little for other people. What was passing in his mind I cannot
say, but simply record his actions.

“Well, I never see the like!” said Charles, who had condescended to let
me in. “Why, he snap’th worse than ever at me; though the Lord knows
how I sweated to get ’un back. But come along this way, Master Kit; my
lady will see you in the Justice-room.”

He showed me into a square panelled chamber, where old Squire Nicholas
used to rule over poachers and little thieves brought before him by the
parish constable; and with _Regulus_ still at my heels, I stood waiting
anxiously for the lady.

At length there came a rustle of silk moving slowly, watered silk,
such as we seldom see now, and can scarcely find time to think of. And
as fine as the silk, and as able to stand alone, was the lady inside
it. Although she lived so near to us, and drove by in her carriage so
often, I knew her rather by sight than speech, and better by report
than either. She was tall, and straight, and of goodly presence, with
fine large features, and a steadfast look, which expressed clear
perception and strong resolve, but less violence of nature than her
sister showed. Her abundant hair, drawn back from her ample forehead
and coiled at the back of her head, would have been jet black but for a
few lines of silver and an undercast of a tint like that of an American
oak-leaf. To me she appeared more imposing and handsome than her sister
Monica; but I may have thought more highly of her because she lived
at Sunbury. This lady made me a graceful bow, a very slight one, but
still it was a bow, and proved that her nature was better than that of
the Honourable Mrs. Bulwrag. I replied with a low bend and scrape of
my foot, which I always understand to be the proper thing, in such a
case. And the guilt of my heart, as I thought of her dog, was enough to
account for the deep blush I felt.

“Are you the young Mr. Orchardson,” she asked, “the nephew of that Mr.
Orchardson who owns the large garden and long walls at Sunbury? Then I
have a little matter to discuss with you. But how strongly my dog seems
to take to you! It is not at all his general character. He is not at
all devoted to mankind. But he has a remarkable memory. Perhaps you
were kind to him when he was quite young. Or perhaps you were even his

“No, ma’am; I know him only as your dog. But most dogs are fond of me.
An aunt of mine has nine, and I was with them yesterday.”

“Oh, that explains it;” she spoke with a smile which made her face
quite beautiful, and I wondered at the taste of the Honourable Tom in
exchanging her for her sister. “Now I dare say you know why I sent for
you. For some years I have not seen very much of my sister, now the
wife of Professor Fairthorn, a man well known in the scientific world.
But a few weeks ago Captain Fairthorn asked me to allow his daughter by
a previous marriage to spend a few days with me here; and I consented,
for I knew him long before he married my sister, and have always felt a
great regard for him. There is no reason why I should enter into that.
Miss Fairthorn was here for about ten days, and she might have been
longer but for you. Who are you, that you should dare to fall in love
with her?”

Now these words look very harsh as written, and would sound so too, if
harshly spoken. But Miss Coldpepper scarcely seemed to mean them thus;
for there was no contempt in her voice, and I thought that her glance
was kind, though her face was very grave. Perhaps she was thinking of
her own love-time; which would rouse at once pity for me, and ill-will
towards the sister, who then had wronged her so.

It was difficult for me to answer her, and I was in no hurry to do so;
knowing from dialogues with Tabby Tapscott, that women are ready to go
on again, and perhaps answer themselves, when provoked to do it. Not
that I compared Miss Coldpepper with our poor Tabby for a moment; only
that much the same rule applies to all women, when they grow unruly.
Their main object is to say something striking, being forbidden by
nature to strike otherwise.

“You have nothing to say then,” continued the lady, without giving me
time to know how much I had; “very well, I think that it is better so.
I have tried to make every allowance for you, and I am glad not to find
you at all defiant. Miss Fairthorn, of course, has no particular claims
of birth to stand upon; for you know, and perhaps you have thought
about that, that she has none of the Coldpepper blood in her system. I
suppose, if she had, you would scarcely have dared to behave in this
way, Mr. Orchardson!”

“Certainly not, madam,” I replied with genuine truth, for I must have
been frightened at the fearful temper of the family. And if Kitty had
been a Coldpepper, she could not have owned the sweet face which had
won me.

“Really, I do not perceive in you,” her ladyship (as our people called
her) went on in a gentler tone, “any signs of that audacity with which
my sister charges you. To me you seem to be a well-meaning and fairly
educated young man. And it may be your misfortune, more than fault,
that you have given this offence. You certainly were of the greatest
service to my niece—as I allow her to call herself, although she is no
niece of mine—when that excessively stupid Marker led her into needless
danger. I do not know what I could have said to Professor Fairthorn, if
his daughter had been swept away, through the folly of my housekeeper.
And more than that, I was beginning to grow rather fond of that young
girl. I found her so ready, and clever, and obliging, and free from
the conceit the young people show now. When she was taken away like
that, I missed her very sadly, and felt for her deeply at having to go
back to—to so very dull a house. But I wish you to understand, young
man, that though I am not in a position to forbid, I cannot in any way
sanction, or even approve your suit to her. And I trust that your own
common sense will induce you to withdraw it, and try to forget her. You
may think it hard. But it must be so. Will you promise to think no more
of her?”

“No, I cannot do that;” I answered in a low voice, which grew stronger,
as my heart warmed with my words. “I will tell you no falsehood, Miss
Coldpepper. As long as I live, I must think of her, and no one else in
all this world. She is more to me than my life, my soul, or even my
hope of another life. From the moment I first set eyes upon her, there
was nothing else worth living for. The Lord, who governs all our ways,
and knows what is the best for us, has been pleased to give me her pure
love, a greater gift than the life He gave; and with His aid I will
hold it fast; and He alone shall ever part us. I am not accustomed to
strong words, but these are weak to what my meaning is.”

“Well, I think they are pretty strong; but I will not blame you for
them.” She turned from my eyes, which were bright with deep passion, as
behoved a well-bred lady. “When things have come to such a pass, there
is little more to be said or done. Only it occurs to me, who have seen
a good deal of men and women, that these brave words are often said,
and for the moment felt, no doubt; but in a few years, or even one, or
perhaps a month—where are they? A new love, equally the gift of Heaven,
comes in with still hotter fervour; and the old one is whistled down
the wind. And why should it not be so with you?” I knew that in the
heat of the moment, she was referring to her own case; and my place was
to be silent.

“Christopher Orchardson,” she said at last, recovering her business
tone, “I have delivered my message to you, and it has not made much
impression. To me the matter is of little moment, except that I like
Miss Fairthorn more than I ever expected to like a girl again. And
I am not pleased, as you may suppose, that she, with her youth, and
abilities, and beauty, should make so poor a marriage. Have you thought
of this? Have you considered whether you have any right to take her
from a rank in life, or at least from a social position above your own,
and keep her in a cottage, among working men, with a scanty and perhaps
doubtful income? You are a man of spirit; do you think this fair?”

This was the point of all points, which perplexed me more than I could
settle. She saw how deeply her words had moved me, and waited with a
grim smile for my reply.

“Yes, I have fully considered that; and it is the one matter I doubt
about. You have put it more clearly, madam, than I could put it, and
entirely without exaggeration. And I scarcely know how to answer,
without referring to things that may pain you. But you may be aware
that Miss Fairthorn at present leads a most unhappy life. And even
worse than that, everything is being done to force her into a miserable
marriage with a man of more than twice her age, and of anything but
good character. He is supposed to be rich, but is poorer than myself,
because he owes more than he can pay. She had better go to her grave,
than become the wife of such a person. From this she has no escape
except the quiet home I can give her. And to live among working men,
who would respect, and look up to, and admire her, is surely less of a
degradation than to be brought into wild and rough company, as in the
other case she must be. It will be known here, that she has had the
honour of your acquaintance and liking; and though you may not think
fit to continue it, under the change of circumstances, people will
value her by what has been. And as for being happy, what is there to
prevent it? She will live in a beautiful place and fine gardens, where
there is always plenty to look at, and enjoy, according to the time of
year, abundance of flowers, and fruit, and good living, my uncle to
make much of her, and myself to worship her, and nobody ever to say a
cross word.”

“It is not surprising that you have won her consent,” Miss Coldpepper
answered gravely, “if you have put your proposals thus. How could a
poor London girl resist such a programme? And Kitty loves the country,
as a lark or a wood-queist does. Well, you must understand that I will
have nothing more to say about it. I have been asked to tell you what I
think, I have done so; and there is an end of it.”

With these words, she rang the bell, for some one to show me the way
out; but having found her much less awful than I had expected, I was
not content to let well alone, but must needs try to get further.

“Madam,” I said, “you have listened so kindly to all I have ventured to
tell you, that I hope you will let me ask one question, without being
thought impertinent. It is only that I should like to know, who it is
that has begged you to speak to me, and whether Captain Fairthorn is
aware of it.”

At once her demeanour was changed to me, and her lofty indifference was
gone. Her eyebrows rose, and her eyelids quivered, and her face flushed
with wrath, like a storm-cloud with the sun.

“I think that I have listened too kindly to you, and the things
you have dared to tell me. It will teach me to have less to say to
underbred young men henceforth. Charles, show this young man where the
front door is.”

This was very clever, and abashed me deeply; as if I had no right to
know any other than the back-entrance. And I observed that she did not
lose her self-command, nor revile me as if on her own level, as her far
less dignified sister did. I was much more entirely smitten down, and
made sensible of my distance from her, as one too deep to be bridged by
words. And yet the sense of justice, which is always strongest in the
young, stood up and bade me take all this as only of human ordinance.
For no thought of presumption had been in my mind, or of undue
familiarity. A cat may look at a king; and the king (like a dog) hath
only his own day.



EVERY one, who can call to mind that year of bad weather, 1860,
will bear me out in saying that it showed no weakness, no lack of
consistency to the last. Rain and chill were the rule of the summer,
snow and severe cold the order of the winter. In the beginning of
December, the earth was sodden, and the rivers thick with flood. Then
the sky was amassed with fog, and the trees hung low with trembling
drip, and even the humble weeds and grass were bearded with a glaucous
reek, not crisp nor bright as of rime or frost, but limp, and dull,
and bleary. Having never seen such a thing till now, I could not tell
what to make of it; but Uncle Corny, who had been compelled for years
to watch the weather, said—“Up with all the winter apples, and the Glou
Morceau, and Beurré Rance, up with them all to Covent Garden, or we
shall have them frozen on the shelves. Or even if we can keep the frost
out, we shall have the van snowed up. Things looked just as they do
now, in December, 1837, only the ground was not so wet. Go down to the
barges, and order in ten tons of coal, we shall want it all, and twenty
chaldrons of gas-coke. The frost will last till February, and fuel will
cost a rare price then.”

I was inclined to laugh at this as a bold and rash prediction; but it
was more than verified by the weather that set in upon the eighteenth
of December, not with any sudden change, but the cold growing more
decided. By this time Honeysuckle Cottage was thoroughly cleansed, and
in good trim, painted, and papered, and neatly furnished, with Tabby
put in to keep it warm, but only permitted to use one room. And I used
to go there every day, and sit in the little parlour, reading the only
letter I had yet received from one who was more to me than words. It
was written in a small clear hand, and dated on the very day after my
visit to her, and the purport of it was to comfort me and persuade me
to wait with all endurance, until I should have leave to come again.
And long as the time had seemed, and dreary, and empty of all except
distant hope, I had done my best to get through it, with the courage of
a man, and the faith of love.

“It is for my dear father’s sake,” she wrote, “that I am compelled to
ask you this. There has been a fearful scene which even his sweet
endurance and wonderful temper could scarcely carry him through,
without sad injury to his health and work. His heart is not very
strong, and though he tries to laugh these troubles off, or despise
them as below his notice, to me it is plain that they worry and wear
him, a great deal more than he deigns to show. And I know that he
bitterly reproaches himself, although he so rarely speaks of it, for
having been so deluded as to place nearly all his property in the power
of those who should only have a part. When he looks at me and sighs,
I know exactly what he is thinking of; and it is my place to save him
from all that can be avoided of strife and ill-treatment. A more placid
and peaceful man never lived, yet comfort and peace are denied him.
In a few weeks he will leave home again—if this house can be called
a home—and then I should like to see you, dear, with his permission
before he goes; because I am not afraid for myself, and I may have to
settle what is to be done, if a certain gentleman should come back,
and try to force his visits upon me, while my father is away. If this
should happen, you shall hear at once, unless I am locked up, as I used
to be sometimes. Do not write; she takes every letter; and it would
only cause more misery. We must trust in Heaven, and in one another;
for I know that you love me, as I love you.”

This very faithful and sensible letter was beginning to grow threadbare
now, or rather was returning to its original state of thread, with
my constant handling. And it left me in a sore predicament, which
became sorer, as time went on, and no other tidings reached me. It was
grievous to reflect, that with better policy, and judicious flattery,
I might perhaps have contrived to get a scrap or two of information
even from the stately lady of the Hall, or at any rate through Mrs.
Marker. But that good housekeeper shunned me now, probably under strict
orders; or if ever I managed to bring her to bay, she declared that
she knew nothing; and perhaps this was true, for the choleric sisters
held little communication. As a last resource, I got Mrs. Tapscott
to promise her niece the most amiable tips for every bit of tidings
she could bring; but nothing came of that, and by this time verily
my condition of mind was feverish. In vain I consulted that oracle
of the neighbourhood—Uncle Corny; for an oracle he was now become,
partly through making good figures of his fruit, partly through holding
tongue and shaking head, and partly no doubt by defeating the lawyers,
and smoking out “Old Arkerate.” But all I could win from this oracle
was—“Go up, and get in at the window.”

I was ready to get in at any window—big enough for my head to pass—if
only I could have found Kitty inside, and quick to forgive me for
coming. But to talk is all very fine, and old men make it do for
everything; to act is the province of the young, who have not found out
how vain it is.

Being touched up therefore on every side—for even old Tabby made sniffs
at me, and Selsey Bill winked, in a manner that meant—“Would there ever
have been seventeen young Selseys, if I had hung fire as you do?”—and
my Uncle said quietly, between two puffs—“In for a penny in for a
pound; that used to be the way when I was young”—being stirred up more
deeply by my own heart, which was sadly unquiet within me, I set off at
last, without a word, and not even a horse to help me.

The frost had set in, that mighty frost which froze the Thames down to
Kingston Bridge, and would have frozen it to London Bridge, except for
one pause at the end of the year, and the rush of so much land-water.
The ground was already as hard as iron, but no snow had fallen to
smother it up. The walking was good, and the legs kept going to keep
one another and the whole affair alive. There must have been a deal
of ground soon overcome between them; for they were not out of Uncle
Corny’s gate till Sunbury clock struck three, and they knocked against
the gate of Bulwrag Park, when the twilight still hung in the sky. And
this had been done against a bitter east wind, with a low scud of snow
flying into the teeth, and scurfing the darkening road with gray.

Here it was needful to reflect a little; for to think against the drift
of air is worthless, for anything weaker than a six-wheeled engine. I
found a little shelter from the old Scotch firs, and halted in their
darkness, and considered what to do. The house, about a hundred yards
away, looked cold, and grim, and repellent, and abhorrent, except
for one sweet warmth inside. The dark shrubs before it were already
powdered with the gathering crust of snow; and the restless wind was
driving cloudy swirls of white along and in under the laps of blue
slate. So far as I could see, one chimney only was issuing token of
some warmth inside. I had scarcely shivered yet in the fierce cold of
the road, and the open tracks where no road was; but I shuddered with a
deep thrill of anguish and dismay, as I watched that bleak house, with
the snow flitting round it, the bitter frost howling in every wild
blast, and not a scrap of fire to keep my sweet love’s body warm.

“If they have not quite starved her, since her father left,” I said to
myself, being sure that he was gone, “they will not lose this chance
of freezing her to death. I have heard what they do in such weather.
They keep her where the water-jugs burst, and the ice is on the pillow,
while they roast themselves by a roaring fire. May they roast for ever!”

Slow as I am of imagination, this picture had such an effect upon
me, that I caught up my stick which had stood against the tree, and
determined to knock the front door in, if they would not admit me
decently. But glancing back first, to be sure of having the place to
myself, I beheld through the wind-hurried flakes an advancing figure.
Two looks were enough; it was my darling, bending to the wind, but
walking bravely, and carrying a basket in her ungloved hand. Her little
thin cloak, and summer hat—for they had given her no other—were as
white as the ground itself with snow, and so were the clusters of her
rich brown hair, which time shall whiten by the side of mine. But her
large blue eyes and soft rosy cheeks were glistening bravely through
the fleecy veil, and a smile of resolve to make the best of all things
showed little teeth whiter than any snowflake. Through the brunt of the
storm she had not descried me, until she was suddenly inside my arms.

Then she dropped her basket in the snow, and looked up at me, and tried
hard to be vexed. But nature and youth were too many for her, and she
threw her glad arms round my neck, and patiently permitted me to leave
no snow either on her face or in her curls.

“Oh, Kit, if they should see us from the house!” she whispered; and I

“They had better not, or they shall have this stick.”

However, for fear of any rashness about that, I led her with a smooth
and easy pace—for she could move beautifully with my arm round her,
which no clumsy girl could do—to a snug little nook, where a large
bay tree broke the power of the wind, and screened the snow. Here we
found a low branch upon which we could sit, with the fragrant leaves
to shelter us; and ever since that when I smell a bayleaf, I can never
help thinking of my love, even when it is in pickled mackerel.

When I had told her a thousand times of my delight at finding her,
and she, with a hundred blushes perhaps, had begged me to show it
judiciously, I asked where she had been in such dreadful weather, and
what she had got in the basket. “Two bottles of brandy,” she answered
as coolly as if it had been a cowslip ball; “from the Bricklayers’ Arms
I had to fetch them, because nobody else would go out in the storm.”

“What!” I cried, looking at her pure and bashful eyes, “do you mean to
say that you are sent alone to a common public-house, where the navvies

“Oh, they never say anything to me, dear Kit. But I cannot bear to go,
when there are noisy people there. And I believe that my father would
be angry if he knew it. It has only happened once or twice, when the
weather was very bad.”

“Does she ever send her own daughters there?” I asked as mildly as I
could, for Kitty was trembling at my natural wrath, and stern manner.

“Oh no! She would not like to send them at all, even if they would go,
which is very doubtful. But she says that my place is to be useful; and
she never can do without brandy long. She gets tired of wine in the

“The case is just this,” I said, wishing to let off my wrath, that I
might speak of more pleasant things; “she revels upon your father’s
money, and squanders it on her children’s whims; she locks him up in a
corner of his own house, makes a slave of his only child, starves and
beats her, and degrades her by sending her for drink to a pot-house. A
young lady—the best, and the sweetest, and noblest—”

I was obliged to stop, in fear of violence. But my dear one became
all the dearer to me, as I thought of her misery and patience. If my
Uncle Cornelius tried to “put upon” me, was I ever known to put up
with it? And consider the difference betwixt an uncle, who fed me, and
kept me, and allowed me money—or at any rate promised to do so—and a
vile stepmother, who ruined the father, and starved and bullied and
disgraced the child! Truly we learn to forget right and wrong; as our
country has learned in these latter days.

“No one can degrade me, but myself,” Miss Fairthorn answered gently,
and without any thought of argument. “But I will not go again, if you
think it wrong. I have been so accustomed to run errands for her, that
I never gave a thought to the difference at first, and having done it
once, I could not say ‘no’ the next time. But I know it is not nice;
and I will never go again, now that I know you object to it, dear. You
won’t be angry, when I have given you my promise?”

“To send an angel to a public-house”—but I said no more about it, for
the angel sighed, and put her hand into mine, to be forgiven. Then I
asked her, with my wrath turning into jealous pangs, about that old
villain, who had dared to imagine that his wealth—if he had any—or at
any rate his position, could bridge over the gulf between virtue and
vice, loveliness and ugliness, sweet maidenhood and sour decrepitude of
bad living. Of these things I could not speak to her; but her modesty
shrank, without knowing why.

“That poor old gentleman has been very ill,” she answered in her clear
and silvery voice, which made me thrill, like music. “He went to see
to some business in Lincolnshire, and was laid up for weeks with ague.
But he is to come back when the weather permits. If he had appeared,
I would have let you know, for I should have been frightened, with my
father not at home. But I am sorry to say there is some one coming,
more formidable to me than Sir Cumberleigh is. You will think I am full
of dislikes, dear Kit, but I do dislike that Downy so. He is her son
Donovan, her only son; and she worships him—if she worships anything.”

I had heard of this Donovan Bulwrag more than once, but knew very
little about him, except that, unless he was much belied, he combined
the vices of both his parents. But my duty was now to reassure my
Kitty, and leave her in good spirits, so far as that was possible.
Though every minute of her company was as precious as a year of life
to me, I was fearful of keeping her longer in the cold, and insuring a
very hot reception from her foes. Of the latter, however, she had not
much dread, being so inured to ill usage, that a little more or less
was not of much consideration. But her cloak was threadbare, and her
teeth began to chatter, as the keen wind shook the tree above us, and
scattered the snow upon our shoulders.

In a few words we arranged to be no longer without frequent news of
one another; for I told her very truly, that without this luck I must
have gone home in utter misery, unless I had forced my way to her; and
with equal sincerity she replied, that she did not know what she could
have done, for the time had been dreary and desolate. Then she promised
to write to me every week, not long love-letters, for of those there
was no need with our pure faith in one another, and her opportunities
would be but brief; yet so as to let me know that she was safe, and not
persecuted more than usual. These letters she must post with her own
hand, and my answers she must call for at a little shop kept by an old
servant of the Captain’s, who would not betray her. If possible, she
would write on Saturdays, so that I might get the letter on a Sunday
morning; and if anything were added to her troubles, I might come, and
try to let her know of it through Mrs. Wilcox, who kept the little
shop she had spoken of. With this I was obliged to be content for the
present; much as I longed for a bolder course, she would not leave her
father, without his full consent.

“But you shall have something to remember me by, and something too
that came from him,” she whispered, as her fears began to grow again.
“He gave me a watch on my last birthday, a beautiful watch with a blue
enamel back, and Kitty done in little diamonds. She said that it was
much too good for me, and she gave it to Geraldine, her youngest girl.
But oh, I cheated them out of something, because I felt that they were
cheating me. They never knew that he had given me a gold key for it,
a lovely little key with a star in the centre. Here it is, see how it
sparkles in the dusk! Take it, my dear, and wear it always, and you
will think it is the key of my heart, Kit, which you managed to steal
down at Sunbury so. You must not give me anything in return. Not now at
least; perhaps some day you may.”

It was now so dark that I ventured to lead her, and carry her basket to
the little side-door, for that part of the house was dark and empty.
Then she gave me a sweet farewell, with one little sob to strengthen
it; and the snow whirled into her glistening eyes, and a shiver ran
through me, when she was gone.



A STRANGE thing befell me on my way home, which I would have avoided
describing if I could; for my adventures have but little interest,
except so far as they are concerned with Kitty. But this one unluckily
did concern her deeply, inasmuch as it brought great affliction on
her, and left her without my assistance, at a time when she stood in
especial need of it.

She had made me promise that I would not attempt to walk all the way
to Sunbury in such a bitter night, and with the storm increasing, till
no one could tell what might come of it. Accordingly I made my way to
Notting Hill, intending to get into an omnibus there, which would take
me at least as far as Richmond. There I meant to have a mutton chop or
two, and perhaps a pint of Mortlake ale, which is generally of good
substance, and thus be set up for the cold walk home. And if this had
been done, as was really intended, probably I might have been at home
in good time to tell my uncle all about it, before he had finished his
go-to-bed pipe.

But as it happened, when I came out at last, from all this brick and
mortar skittle-ground, into the broad Western road, and knew pretty
well where I was and how the land lay, not an omnibus was to be found
anywhere, except those that had travelled out before the storm began,
and were bound to get home again somehow. And these had some trouble
in getting along, with the snow clouding up in the horses’ faces, and
forming great balls on their feet, and clogging the dumb, heavy roll
of the frozen wheels. All the ’busses that should have been ploughing
and rolling towards Shepherd’s Bush and Turnham Green, had resolved to
remain in their yards for the night. Let other horses tug, and wallow,
and smoke like beds of mortar; let other coachmen flap their breasts
and scowl instead of answering; and let other threepenny fares look
blue and stamp in the straw to thaw their toes. It was worth much more
than the money would fetch, to cross their legs by the taproom fire, or
whisk their tails in stable.

At first I took it as a wholesome joke, that the fourteen miles of road
before me must be overcome by toe and heel. As for a cab, I had never
been inside any feminine bandbox of that name, and if I would have
condescended to it, there was no such thing to be got to-night. I was
young, and strong, and full of spirit, with the sweet words kindling
in my heart, as memory stirred it from time to time; and if any one
had bidden me look out for danger, I should have said, “Let me see it
first.” And in this humour, I strode on, without even turning my collar

But the world became wrapped up more and more in deep white darkness,
as I trudged on. As the houses along the road grew scarcer, they seemed
to go by me more heavily and slowly, and with less and less power of
companionship. There was scarcely a man to say “Good-night” to; and
the one or two I met would not open mouth to answer. And when I came
through a great open space, with a white spire standing like a giant’s
ghost, I could hardly be sure that it was Turnham Green, so entirely
was distance huddled up with snow. But I ran into a white thing in the
middle of the road, and the gleam of an ostler’s lantern showed me that
it was a brewer’s dray, with the horses taken out, and standing with
their heads between their legs close by a sign-post. “You better turn
in, mate,” the ostler shouted; “you’re a fool if you go further, such a
night as this.” I saw a red steam in the bar, and knew that this must
be the _Old Pack-Horse Inn_, whose landlord had raised a famous apple;
and my better sense told me to follow advice. But the pride of fool’s
strength drove me on, and without slacking a foot I lost sight of it in
the solid daze.

There was nothing to be afraid of yet, and I felt no kind of misgiving,
but began to let my legs go on, instead walking consciously. At one
time I began to count, as if they were a machine of which I was no
longer master. I counted up to a thousand, and thought—“About seven
thousand more will do it, and that they can manage without much
trouble.” Then I gave up counting, and must have passed through
Brentford, as in a dream, and so to Twickenham, and through that again.

There were nearer ways in better weather; but although I could not
think clearly now (through cold, and clogging feet, and constant dazzle
of white fall around me) I had sense enough to stick to highways, as
long as they would stick to me. At Twickenham I had a mind to stop and
get something to eat, being faint with hunger, for I had seven and
sixpence in my waistcoat pocket. I cannot tell why I did not stop, and
only know that I went on.

The snow must have been ten inches deep on the level, and as many feet
in the drifts, for a strong wind urged it fiercely, when I came at
last to the _Bear_ at Hanworth, an old-established and good hotel. The
principal entrance was snowed up, from the sweep of the roads that meet
there, for every road running east and west was like a cannon exploding
snow. But I went in by the little door round the corner, and finding
only the barman there—for all neighbours had been glad to get home
while they could—I contrived, with some trouble, to ask for a glass of
hot brandy and water. So great was the change from the storm and the
whirl, that my brain seemed to beat like a flail in a barn, and the
chairs were all standing on the ceiling.

“Don’t you go no further, sir; you stop here,” said the man, who seemed
to know me, though I did not know him. “It would take a male helephant
to get to Sunbury to-night There’s been no such snow for six and forty
year; old Jim the ostler can call it to mind; and then it was over the
roof, he saith. You look uncommon queer already, seem to be standing on
your head a’most. Why, bless me, you be drinking from the empty glass!”

But I found the right glass with his help, and swallowed the hot brown
draught without knowing it. Then I asked him the time, and he said,
“Nigh on ten o’clock. You take my advice, and have a bed here. Well,
wilful will, and woeful won’t, when it’s too late to mend it.” He cast
this at me as I said “Good night,” and without sitting down, staggered
out again.

I believe that even now I should have reached home safely, not having
so very much further to go, if the roads had been wide and straight
as they were thus far. But two things were very much against me now,
and both of them made a great difference. I had turned from the main
road into twisting narrow lanes, and my course was across the wind
instead of right before it. Without that strong wind at my back I could
scarcely have reached Hanworth by that time, though it seemed a very
long time to take from Notting Hill, compared with the usual rate of
walking. But now the fierce wind was on my left side quite as often
as behind me, and it drove me from my line, as I grew more feeble,
and knocked my weary legs into one another. Moreover, it seemed to go
through me twice as much, and to rattle me like splinter shaken up, and
to drive the spikes of snow to my heart almost.

If I had walked as in a dream before, I was moving as in a deep sleep
now. I had some sort of sense of going on for ever, as a man has a
knowledge of his own snoring; and I have some weak remembrance of
beating with my hands—for my stick must have gone away long ago—to
keep off a blanket that was smothering me. Then I seemed to be lifted,
and set down somewhere, and it did not matter where it was. And what
happened after that was not to me, but to people who told me of it

For my Uncle Corny went to bed that night, in a very bad worry of mind,
and fitter to grumble at the Lord than to say his prayers. Not from
anxiety about his nephew, who was sure to turn up somehow; but because
he had frightful misgivings about his glass, and his trees, and his
premises at large. The roof of his long vinery was buckled in already,
when he went with a lantern to look at it; and many of his favourite
apple-trees, which he loved to go and gaze at on a Sunday, were bowed
with the wind and the snow, and hanging in draggles, like so much
mistletoe. He never swore much at the weather; because it seemed like
swearing at heaven, and he had found it grow worse under that sort of
treatment. But our Tabby Tapscott (who feared to go home, and tried
to sleep on two chairs in the kitchen) declared that he used some
expressions that night, which were quite enough to account for anything.

In the morning, however, there was no fault to find with him, as soon
as he had done a good hour’s work in the deep snow and the nipping
wind, and improved his circulation by convincing everybody that he was
still as young as he ever was. He relieved the laden trees, wherever it
was wise to do so, and with the back of a hay-rake fetched the white
incumbrance from the glass, and stamped his feet and shook his coat,
and had a path swept here and there, and told himself and Selsey Bill,
that a good old-fashioned winter was the thing to send all prices up.
But when he sat down to breakfast, he kept looking at the door, as if
for me; and at last he said to Mrs. Tapscott, who was shaking in her
apron—“Why, where’s that lazy Kit again? Is he frozen to his pillow? Go
and give him a good rattle up. He deserves cold victuals, and he shall
have nothing else.”

“Her bain’t coom home,” replied Tabby, looking as crossly as she dared
at him. “Much you care for the poor boy, measter. I rackon the znow be
his winding-shate. No more coortin’ for he, this zide of kingdom coom,
I’d lay a penny.”

“Kit not come home! Kit out all night, and you let me go on with my
trees and roofs! But you know where he is, or you would not take it so,
and you snoring away by the kitchen fire. None of your secrets about
him. Where is Kit?”

“The Lord A’mighty know’th where a’ be.” Poor Tabby began to whine and
cry. “The zecret be with Him, not me. A’ wor to coom home, but her
never didn’t. A vaine job for e’e to zake for ’un. Vaind un dade as a
stone, I reckon.”

“Nonsense! Kit can take care of himself. He is the strongest young
fellow for miles and miles, and accustomed to all sorts of weather.
What’s a bit of snow to a young man like Kit? You women always make the
worst of everything.”

“But her bain’t coom home;” answered Tabby with all reason. “Her would
’a coom home, if so be her worn’t drowned in the znow, I tull ’e, sir.
No more coortin’ for Measter Kit, in this laife. A’ may do what a’
wool, in kingdom coom.”

“Stuff!” cried my uncle, not caring to discuss this extreme test of
my constancy. “He has stopped at some house on the road, or up there.
Perhaps the Professor would not let him go, when he saw how bad the
weather was. There is nothing to be done, till the post comes in;
though I am not sure that the post will be able to get in. If the
letters are not here by ten o’clock, I shall go to Hampton to look for
them. They are pretty sure to get that far.”

The morning was fine, though bitterly cold after that very heavy fall;
and people began to get about again, though the drifts were too deep in
many places for a carriage to pass till they had been cleared. My uncle
set out on foot for Hampton, and there found the mail cart just come
in. The postmaster was in a state of flurry, and would not open the
Sunbury bag, but sent it on by special messenger, as the cart could get
no further. My uncle had the pleasure of walking with it as far as our
post-office; and after all that there was nothing for him. “Well, a man
must eat,” was his sound reflection. “I shall have a bit of dinner, and
consider what to do.”

It was getting on for two o’clock, as they told me, when a man who had
come from the Bear at Hanworth, upon some particular business in our
village, knocked at my uncle’s door on his return, to say that I had
forgotten (which was the truth) to pay for what I had the night before.
He was also to ask how I got home, because I looked “uncommon dickey,”
as he beautifully expressed it. In half an hour every man in Sunbury,
owning a good pair of legs, and even a number of women and boys, set
forth to search the roads and fields, for it was hard sometimes to
tell which was which, in the direction of Hanworth. This was no small
proof of the good-will and brave humanity of our neighbourhood; for any
of these people might have lost themselves in the numb frost, and the
depth of drift; and there were signs of another storm in the north-east.

My uncle, with a big shovel on his shoulder, and a bottle of brandy
in his pocket, put a guinea upon me at first, and then two, and then
jumped to five pounds, and even ten, as the hope of discovery waned;
and at last, when some had abandoned the search, and others were
muffling themselves against the new snowstorm, he mounted a gate and
with both hands to his mouth shouted—“Five and twenty pounds for my
nephew Kit—dead or alive; twenty-five pounds reward to any one who
finds Christopher Orchardson.”

This may appear a great deal of money for anybody to put me at (except
my own mother, if I had one), and the people who heard it were of that
opinion, none of them being aware perhaps that the reward would come
out of my mother’s property, which had no trustees to prevent it. And
for many years afterwards, if I dared to think anything said or done by
my uncle was anything short of perfection, the women, and even the men
would ask—as if I were made of ingratitude—“Who offered five and twenty
pounds for you?”

And they felt the effect of it now so strongly that a loud hurrah went
along the white plain, and several stout fellows who were turning home
turned back again, and flapped themselves, saying, “Never say die!”
With one accord a fresh pursuit began, though perhaps of a ghost even
whiter than the snow; and taking care to keep in sight of one another,
they began to poke more holes, wherever they could poke them. For some
had kidney-bean sticks, and some had garden forks, and some had sharp
pitch-forks from the stable; and if they had found me, I had surely
been riddled, and perhaps had both my eyes poked out. But the Lord was
good to me once more, and I escaped being trussed, as I might have been.

For just when it was growing dark, and another bitter night was setting
in, with spangles of hard snow driving, as they said, like a glazier’s
diamond into their eyes, and even the heartiest man was saying that
nothing more could be done for it; through the drifting of the white,
and the lowering of the gray, a high-mettled horse came churning. It
was beautiful, everybody thought, to see him scattering the snow like
highway dust, flinging from his nostrils scornful volumes, with his
great eyes flashing like a lighthouse in the foam. Men huddled aside,
lest he should spurn them like a drift, for his courage was roused, and
he knew no fear, but gloried in the power of his leap and plunge.

“Giving it over, are you all?” Sam Henderson shouted, as he drew the
rein, and his favourite stallion _Haro_ stood, and looked with the like
contempt at them. “Then a horse and dog shall shame your pluck.”

From beneath the short rough cloak he wore, a pair of sharp eyes shone
like jewels, and two little ears pricked up like thorns.

“_Spike_ is the best man here,” said Sam, as the wiseacres crowded
round him. “All you have done is to spoil the track. Keep behind me,
and let me see things for myself.”

My uncle, who never had been fond of Sam, said something disdainful and
turned away; but Henderson, without even looking at him, rode on, and
the best men followed him. He took them almost to the _Bear_ Hotel,
watching both sides of the road, as he went, and still keeping his dog
before him. Then he turned back, and said, “Keep you all on my left.
None of you tread any gap on the right. I saw the place as I came
along. When the moon gets clear, we shall find him.”

The snow-cloud in the east began to lift, and the moon came out with
a bronzy flush, as my uncle told me afterwards, and the broad expanse
of snow was flickered with wan light and with gliding shades. Then all
came back to the place where Sam, being mounted and able to command the
slope, had discovered certain dimples—for they were nothing more—which
might be the trace of footsteps snowed over. Here he gave his horse to
be held, and leaving the road with his little Scotch terrier _Spike_,
scooped the light surface from one of the marks, and found a hard clot
beneath it. He put the dog’s nose in, and patted him, and _Spike_ gave
a yelp, as if a rat were in prospect.

“Let him alone. Don’t say a word to him,” cried Sam, as our people grew
eager. “He don’t want you to teach him his business. If you knew your
own half as well, there’d be less money in London than in Sunbury. Keep
back, I say, all of you.”

The little dog led them across a broad meadow, two or three hundred
yards from the highway, yet in a straighter line towards Sunbury, and
nearly in the track of an old foot-path. Then he stopped in a dip,
where a great rise of snow, like a surge of ground-swell, swung away
from them, and combed over into the field beyond without breaking, like
the ground-swell frozen. They said that it was a most beautiful sight,
such as they never had seen before, and could scarcely hope to see
again in one lifetime; reminding them of the great wax-works, when the
wax is being bleached, at Teddington. But they could not stop to look
at it; and the little dog went round, and dived into the tunnel on the
further side.

Presently he yapped, as if in hot chase of a rabbit; and an active
young fellow jumped through the great wave, and was swallowed up,
leaving his hat behind. Then they heard him crying faintly, “Here he
is! Come round, and dig us out to this side.”

It is a strange thing, and I have not the smallest remembrance of
having done it; but I must have dragged my frozen body through the
hedge, in the cope of life with death, and got on the leeward side of
a stiff bulwark of newly bill-hooked ashplant, which stopped the sweep
of drift, and served to cast it like the lap of a counterpane over me.
In the bottom where I lay there was scarcely any snow, but a soft bed
of fallen leaves, upon which they found me lying like a gate-post flung
by, to season.

“Dead as a doornail!” said Rasp the baker.

“Stiff as a starfish!” cried Pluggs the grocer, who had spent his last
holidays at the seaside.

“Ay, and colder than a skinned eel!” added Jakes, the barrowman.

But my uncle said—“Out with you, coward lot of curs! Our Kit shall
outlive every one of you. The Lord hath not put him in that nest for

Then Sam Henderson pulled off his cloak, like the Good Samaritan, and
threw it over me. And taking me by the shoulders, with my uncle at the
feet, he helped to bear my stiff body back to the road; where they
set me upon _Haro_, with my head upon his mane; and the young man who
had jumped into the drift was sent ahead, to fetch Dr. Sippets to my
uncle’s house.



THAT season, there was no Christmas-tide for me; no “Happy New Year,”
to wish to others, and be wished; nor even so much as a Valentine’s
Day, to send poems to girls, and get caricatures. In the leeward of
the wild storm, I had been saved by a merciful power from the frost
of death, and by constant care and indefatigable skill, I was slowly
brought back into the warmth of life. But strong as I was, and of tough
and active frame, with habits of temperance and exercise, there was no
making little of the mischief done; and I could not have survived it,
if I had been a clever fellow. For one of the most racking and deadly
evils of all that beset the human frame was established in mine, and
there worked its savage will. When I was just beginning to get warm
again, and to ask where I was, and to stretch my tingling joints,
symptoms of rheumatic fever showed, and for weeks and for months it
ran its agonizing course. The doctor did all that any man could do;
and my uncle went up to his cupboard in the wall by the head of his
bed, and brought down a leather bag, and looked at it fondly, and then
looked at me.

“It was put by for a rainy day; and there can’t be a rainier day than
this,” he said with some drops in his own eyes, as Tabby told me
afterwards. “Let the business go to the dogs, if it will. Where’s the
use of keeping up, with no one to keep up for? Dr. Sippets, I never
thought to see this day. Fetch the best man in London, and let him
cheat me, if he will.”

If I had been at all a clever fellow, my mind would have stayed with
me, and worried out my heart, when dreadfully pushed to carry on its
proper work, with the lowering and the heightening, and the quivering
of the pulse. But being just a simple mind, that took its cue from
body, and depended on the brain for motion, and the eyes for guidance,
when these went amiss it quite struck work; and never even asked who
its master was. Thus it came to pass that Kitty’s sweet and tender
letters lay upon a shelf but a yard or two away, and no hand was yet
stretched out for them.

At last there came a letter sent in special trouble, as was plain from
many signs upon it, and from the mode of its delivery. For Mrs. Wilcox
came herself, the roads being once more passable, and perceiving how
things were in the house had a long talk with my uncle. This good
woman, as I may have said, was much attached to Miss Fairthorn, and had
promised to take charge of my replies, and even to give me tidings of
her, if anything happened to disable her from writing. But no provision
had been made for any default on my part, as I was supposed to be free,
and strong, and sure to come when called for.

“The poor young thing has been in such a taking,” Mrs. Wilcox told my
uncle, “at not having so much as a single line from your poor nephew,
you see, sir. You may put it to yourself how you would feel to be
looking and looking for letters about business; and this is worse than
business to young folk; they goes on as if it was all the world to
them. And Miss Kitty always did have such an uncommon tender heart; you
never see the like of it in all your life. What was she to conclude
except that Mr. Kit had throwed her over, and perhaps taken up with
some of them country girls down here. It wasn’t, you see, sir, as if
he had written once, and told her he meant to stick fast to her. And
yet she couldn’t bring her mind for to believe that such a nice young
gent would be guilty of such conduct; and of course she knows right
well how bootiful she is, though you never see her look that sort of
way, as young ladies with a quarter of her good looks does. I declare
to you, sir, when I was in the ’bus, holding of this bag exactly as
you see me now, I felt that I could scratch out both his eyes, tall
and strong as he is by Miss Kitty’s account. Bless her gentle heart,
what a way she will be in, when she hears she have thought ill of him
undeserving. Though a relief, sir, on the whole, for I believe she
never done it; and better be in a snow-drift than belong to another

“You are a remarkably sensible lady,” said my uncle, desiring to make
the best of things. “But I do not like to open poor Kit’s letters; and
there are six of them already on a bracket by his bed, waiting till he
comes round a bit. You must understand, Mrs. Wilcox, what this means.
He isn’t off his head, exactly, but—you know that we all get a little
abroad, when we lie on our backs so long as not to know our legs.”

“I do, sir, I do. I can feel it all through me, by means of what
happened to my own husband. Ah, he was a man—could take a scuttle full
of coals, and hold it out straight, the same as you might march up the
aisle on a Sunday, with your hat right for’ard, to show that it was
brushed and shining. But poor Wilcox, he went away at last, with a tub
of clothes in his lungs, and the same may occur to the best of us;
mayn’t it, Mr. Orchardson? But if you feel a delicate sort of feeling
about breaking open the young lady’s letter, and the young gent from
the snow-drift is still looking at his legs, I can tell you a good bit
of what is going on; though I never was one, and Wilcox knew it, for
hearkening so much as a word they say, when the women have done with
their teas, and the men stand against the low green palings, with a
pot, and a pipe as long as their shirt-sleeves.

“Well, sir, it do appear that two bad ones has turned up, over and
above the one always there, which I will not name, consequent upon
fear. One was Sir Cumberance Hotchpots, or some such name, proving
to be a wicked man from the North; and the other was her brother,
as ought to be all over, according to the flesh of marriage, sir.
Donovan Bulwrag is his name, but every one prefer to call him ‘Downy.’
A hulking young man is my opinion of him; and it has been my lot to
behold a good many. You may see it on the tables, sir, that come down
from the Mount, going into church any Sunday, that such is forbidden by
the law of Moses, for any Christian man to marry. Their father is one,
and their mother is one; and they have no right to make a pair of them.
You holds on with that, sir, as a respectable man, who has trodden his
way in the world, is bound to do?”

“Yes, Mrs. Wilcox, I hold to it strongly,” said my uncle, “if I
understand you. Do you mean to tell me, that this young man—”

“There is the facts, sir, and none of my telling. I was always a very
bad hand at telling, though Wilcox he used to say otherwise, when he
might be overcome in argument. But facts or no facts, the truth is as
I tell you. This Mr. Donovan have come home, from Germany, or some
such foreign parts; and whatever his meaning is, that is what it comes
to—Miss Kitty can’t have no peace with him. And a yellow young man, Mr.
Orchardson; as yellow as a daffodil, his hair, and beard, and eyes.”

“I don’t care a fig what his colour may be,” cried my uncle, being now
on his high ropes; “he must be a black blackguard, and nothing else,
if he dares to take advantage of a girl he should protect. Poor Kitty,
what a pretty kettle of fish she is in! You need not tell me, ma’am, I
can see it all. I have always had a gift in that way. Though I have not
had so very much to do with women, for which I thank the Lord, every
night of my life, I understand their ways, as well as if I had been one
of them.”

“Then you must be a wonderful man, sir, indeed. The most wonderful I
ever come across.” Mrs. Wilcox smoothed her dress, as if to ask what
was inside it, but reserved her own opinion as to what was not.

“I mean it,” said my Uncle, who grew stronger always, whenever called
in question. “It may not be the general thing; but so it is with me.
And now I would venture to ask you, ma’am, what you consider the next
thing to do.”

“Well,” replied the lady, highly flattered by request for advice from
such an oracle, “if I were a strong man and a very clever one, I know
what I should do at once. I should go up and fetch her away from them
all, and let none of them come anigh her.”

“And what would you say, ma’am, supposing you had done it, when you
found yourself served, the next morning perhaps, with a warrant for
abduction of a maiden under age, and then committed for trial as a
criminal? What would you say to that, Mrs. Wilcox?”

“I should say that the laws was outrageous, and made for the
encouragement of vice and wickedness. And I should put it in the
newspapers, right and left, till the public came and broke down the
doors of the jail, and got up a public subscription for me.”

“Where is her father? What is he about?” My uncle thought it waste
of time to argue after that. “Her father is the only person who can
interfere. Has he been knocked on the head, and killed by one of his
own battering rams?” Mr. Orchardson’s knowledge of scientific matters
was more elementary than even mine.

“Not to my knowledge, sir; though like enough that will be the end of
him. He have gone to the ends of the earth, I believe, to arrange for
going ever so much further in the Spring. There is no help to be got
from him, sir, now, if there ever was any chance of it. The poor young
lady is delivered as a lamb between two lions to devour her, with a
tigress patting them on the back, and holding her down while they carry
it out. What will Mr. Kit say, if you allow it, sir?”

“You may be quite sure that I will never allow it, though at present
I cannot see what to do. You have quicker wits than we have, ma’am; I
ask you again, is there anything you can think of? Has her father any
friends who would take her in?”

“Not one, to my knowledge,” answered Mrs. Wilcox, after counting on her
finger-tips some names that she had heard of; “that dreadful creature
have contrived to make every lady in the land afraid of her. And the
poor Professor only knows the learned men, and the learneder they are
the less they cares for one another. ’Tis the learning that is at the
foot of all this trouble. You must see it so yourself, sir, when you
come to think about it.”

“And the law, Mrs. Wilcox, the law is still worse. She is not of age,
you see; and her father has placed her, or at any rate left her, in
the charge of that woman, whom he has been fool enough to marry. If my
nephew were in health, I should say to him at once, ‘Take the bull by
the horns, or at least take the young lady, get a licence, and marry
her, and defy those people. Her father’s consent has been given; and
if he chooses to leave her in that helpless state, you must rescue
her, and have no shilly-shallying. But for me to come and take her, is
another pair of shoes. It might ruin her fair name, as well as get me
into trouble; and what could I do with her, when I had got her?”

“You are right, sir; I see it all as clearly as you put it. But will
you come up, and have a talk with her? A word from you would go as
far as ten from me. And it would make her feel so much less forsaken
like. I could manage to get her down to my little place, and the news I
have got for her about poor Mr. Kit will set her up in one way, while
it knocks her down in another. Oh, how she have cried, to think that
he could be so false to her, because she wouldn’t believe a single
word of it, all the blessed time! And now, if I can send my little
Ted to her to-night—the sharpest little chap he is, in all the brick
and mortar trade; he have never lost a sixpence, sir, from all them
roaring navvies—though you might not think it, it will brisk her up
amazingly. There is nothing so hagonizing to the female spirit, sir, as
to find itself forsaken by the other sex. And your nephew, Master Kit,
he mustn’t think of dying yet; no cough about him, sir, nor nothing in
the kidneys, only got a chill from being frozen to a hicicle, and his
head upon the moon, which goes for nothing. Lor’, sir, the number of
young men comes every day, from the best part of London, too, according
to my Ted, a-staring at the great works round our way, which is to be
the fashion in a few more years, and not a head among them fit to go
upon a donkey! It doesn’t matter what’s the matter with the head, one
item, sir, in these times now upon us and increasing daily. Keep your
spirits up, sir, and I shall tell Miss Kitty. A young man, as is all
right, except inside his head, isn’t no more to complain of than a
cuckoo-clock, that have left off striking, and keeps better time for
that. What time did you say the last ’bus at Hampton was, sir? If I was
to lose it, wherever should I be? And a good step from here to Hampton,

“I will send you to Hampton, in the spring-cart, Mrs. Wilcox,” said my
uncle, warmly joining in her estimate of the age; “and to-morrow, if
the roads permit, I shall hope to call upon you, about eleven o’clock;
and if you can manage to get Miss Fairthorn to meet me, why, it may be
a little comfort to her, and we may be able perhaps to see what can be
done for her.”



IT could hardly be expected that my Uncle Corny should grow very
miserable about this matter. He knew that young people of the ordinary
cast tumble into love and tumble out again, with perhaps a little
running of the eyes and nose, and a hat crushed on the head, or a
ribbon saturated; but nothing that penetrates the skin, far less puts
a “tub of clothes,” as Mrs. Wilcox said, into the lungs. And it would
not have been reasonable to demand of him, that he should believe in
any grand distinction between the case of Kitty and myself, and that of
any other couple he might come across, in a life whose main nucleus was
Covent Garden. That which chiefly moved him, as he told me in the end,
and as I might have known without his telling, was the iron sense of
justice, gilded haply at the corners, and crowned with a little touch
of chivalry. To his sturdy sense of right it seemed a monstrous thing,
that an innocent girl, and such a lovely girl, should be locked away
from all who were longing to help her, and left at the mercy of two bad

Therefore he donned his Sunday clothes, though he grumbled a good
deal at having to do it, and without a word to me, put old _Spanker_
in the shafts, and drove away alone in the green spring-cart, with a
face which made all the village say to one another, that he must have
a County-court job on his hands. Dr. Sippets, who came to see me every
day, had by this time supplied such a row of medicine-bottles, that we
glazed a new wall with them forty yards long, for he would not allow a
farthing on their return, though he put them in the bill at twopence
halfpenny apiece; and that glazing brought him even more than that much
again, from the number of boys’ fingers which he had to dress. For
he was a skilful, as well as zealous man, and did his utmost for his
patients and his family.

He had now begun to “exhibit” mustard oil externally, as well as zinc,
and especially sulphur inside; till the sulphur began to ooze through
my pores, as if I had been a tea rose suffering from mildew. Then
Tabby had to rub me with the mustard oil; and the more I groaned, the
surer she became of its effect. With this vigorous treatment I began
to rally, and even heard Uncle Corny depart, and contrived to steal a
peep at him behind the window curtain. But they told me some fib about
his errand.

When he put up his horse, somewhere near Holland Park, he had not far
to walk to find Mrs. Wilcox, who received him with great cordiality.
And she sent her little Ted, who proved to be the very boy that had
guided me among the brickfields, with a note which he managed to convey
to Miss Fairthorn. “Rumpus going on,” he said when he came back; “they
makes more rumpus in that house, than a score of navvies over one red
herring. But cooky’s not a bad sort; she’ll give it to her.”

It was nearly an hour before Miss Fairthorn came, and then she was so
nervous, and down-hearted, that they scarcely knew what to do with her.
At first she had quite forgotten Uncle Corny, having never seen him
in his best clothes at home, and being distracted with sorrow and ill
usage. For as yet Mrs. Wilcox had been unable to get a word with her
about the visit of the day before. Gradually, however, she began to
understand what had happened, and why she had not heard from me.

“Then he has not forgotten me, after all!” she said, in a tone that
made her old nurse sob, and my uncle look out of the window. “Something
told me all along, that he could not forget me, any more than I could
do such a thing to him. But you say that he is ill, that he has long
been ill; and perhaps he will never be well any more. Tell me the
truth, I would rather know it. Is he dead, is he dead, Mr. Orchardson?”

“No, my dear, thank the Lord, he is all alive, and getting ever so much
better every day. He went off his head, just a little for a time; and
he did not know me from the man in the moon; and what do you think was
the word that was on his tongue, all day, and all night too for that
matter? Guess, and I’ll tell you if you are right.”

“Oh, I know what it was! It began with a K, and it was not a very long
word, was it? It was ‘Kitty.’ Don’t tell me that it was anything but

“No, my dear, I won’t, because I never tell fibs. Sure enough that was
it, like a cherry-clapper; only in a hundred different tones. I used to
say that if you were there, you’d get heartily tired of your own name.”

“Never, so long as it came from his lips. But I think I should have
broken my heart, all the same. It has been the kindest thing you could
do, to keep all knowledge of this long suspense from me. How soon will
he be better? How soon will he be well again? Well enough, I mean, to
come down and let me see him?”

“At present, Miss Fairthorn, wherever he is not mustard, he is
brimstone. You cannot expect him to present himself in that condition.
But we have got the mischief out of his joints by this time. Dr.
Sippets considers it a very happy thing that the ailment flew there;
for his heart will be all right, and that’s a great part of the system,
in love. His head is of no importance in that condition; and Mrs.
Wilcox proved to me last night, that it is quite a superfluity in the
present days. Madam, you know you did, and you did it thoroughly.”

My uncle gave a wink at Mrs. Wilcox, not with any overture to
familiarity—for he was very shy of widows—but to intimate to her that
she should talk a little nonsense, after his example, as a rescue from
hysterics. For poor Kitty had been passing through much outrage all
the morning; and now to be met with this shock of strange news (bad to
her head, but perhaps good for her heart) after such a long time of
dejection was enough to throw the finest daughter of Divine Science
into some confusion as to all her organisms. But she fetched herself
back from the precipice of sobs, with a deep draught of air, and spoke
as she did not feel.

“If he is being treated like—like beef, I think I ought to have a voice
in the matter. Will you let me come down, and do it for him—or see that
it is done properly? My father has taught me so many things—”

“My dear,” said my uncle, being truly thankful to her, for not even
pulling out her handkerchief, “you are the sweetest young lady I have
ever met. No, you shall not come down and nurse our Kit; not only
because it is not the place for you, but also that it might be very
bad for him. His mind must not come back with a jerk, however pleasant
the jerk may be. He must come round slowly, and he has begun to do it,
under Tabby Tapscott’s scrubbing-brush. But you shall come and see him,
in a week, my dear, if you think you can hold out so long here. And now
tell me, what is going on, to urge your gentle nature so.”

The young lady looked at Mrs. Wilcox, as if she could hardly tell what
to do. She was very unwilling to refuse my uncle anything he might ask
her; and yet she could not bring herself to speak of such matters to

“I will tell you all about it, when she is gone,” said the lady of the
shop, as if hurried for time; “but I know by her look that she is
getting in a fright. What will they do, if they catch you out, dearie?”

“I defy them. I defy them. They may do what they like. Now I know that
Kit stands fast to me, after all he has suffered for my sake, am I
likely to show the white feather? Uncle Corny, I will come away with
you, and let them do their worst, if you will take me.”

She pulled her hat down on her forehead, and drew her crinoline into
small compass, as if she were ready to mount our spring-cart; and her
manner had such an effect on my uncle—for very pretty girls do even
more by attitude, than by words or looks—that he saw himself driving
her away, and looking back with a whistle of defiance at the world.
Moreover she had called him “Uncle Corny,” which put him on his mettle
to deserve it; and though there have been few men born as yet, with
more gift of decision in their nature, he looked at her lovingly, and

“It will not do,” Mrs. Wilcox interrupted, as if she were once more in
office as nurse. “Of law I know nothing, sir, and you do; as you was
pleased to tell me yesterday. If her father was at home, and sanctioned
it, no doubt it might be in your jurisdiction”—the good lady was proud
of her law, and repeated—“it might be in your jurisdiction, sir. But
without any sign of that, where should we be? Pulled up for conspiracy
against the realm, and nothing for me, but to put my shutters up.”

“I fear that you are right, ma’am,” replied my uncle, “though I don’t
care twopence for the law sometimes, when I feel better law inside me.
But it is the young lady we must think of first. We must let her do
nothing to injure herself. Have patience, my dear. They may torment
you in the house, but they cannot take you out of it, and marry you to
anybody, against your own will and pleasure. Your will and pleasure is
to have our Kit; and with the will of the Lord, you shall do so.”

“I suppose I must go back. There seems nothing else to do;” Miss
Fairthorn spoke very sadly, looking from one to the other, and trying
to be cheerful. “But if the worst comes to the worst, will you find a
place for me, Uncle Corny? I have got a little money my dear father
gave me; and they shall take away my life, before they get it.”

“Bravo, well said indeed, my dear!” This alone was needed to confirm
my uncle in his high opinion of her. “What a wife you will make for a
steady young man! Yes, my dear child, I will find you a place, and you
shan’t pay sixpence for it. And none but your father shall take you
away, unless the Lord Chancellor comes himself to fetch you.”

“Thank you. Then I shall know what to do. I am not so much afraid of
them, now I know that Kit is true. I shall say to myself—‘What is this
to put up with, after all that he has borne for me?’ Give him my best
love, and tell him to get well, and sit by the window, and look out for
me. Good-bye, Uncle Corny; I will not attempt to thank you. Good-bye,
nurse. I don’t deserve such friends. They may do what they like now,
and I shall only laugh.”

“She deserves the best friends, and she shall have them too,” Mr.
Orchardson said, as soon as she was gone, with little Ted to see the
way clear for her; “that’s what I call a downright good girl, without
a bit of humbug in her. A fig for their science! Will it ever produce
such a fine bit of nature as that is? Now tell me, as far as you can,
Mrs. Wilcox, what is it they want to do with her, why they torment her
so, and what we can do to stop it?”

My uncle laid his watch on the table, because he wished to be home
before dark, and the days, though drawing out nicely, were not very
long. He knew that the lady with whom he had to deal, instead of
putting things into small compass, would fetch a large compass about
them, whose radius would only be lengthened by any disturbance or hurry
on his part. So he merely placed his watch as a silent, or at least a
comparatively quiet witness, and reproof; but the scheme failed, as
it deserved to do. All he obtained by it was a lesson, which he often
repeated afterwards—never set a watch to go against a woman’s tongue;
it puts her on her mettle to outgo it; and one wants winding, but the
other never does.

Mrs. Wilcox had not so very much to tell, but she found a vast quantity
to say, and never said it twice to the same effect. Stripped of her
embellishments, reflections, divergencies, and other little sallies, it
was something as follows.

Captain Fairthorn had been called away to see to the fitting of
some ship near Glasgow, with engines of a special kind, and large
coal-storage, so that she might keep at sea for months together—seven
years the lady said, but that looked like a lady’s tale. And there
were to be wonderful appliances, such as had never been heard of, on
board her, as well as every kind of scientific instrument, all under
the Professor’s own direction. If ever a man was in his own element,
this was the man, and the time and place were there. No wonder that he
forgot all other things below the moon; and it was much to his credit
that before he started, he insisted on a promise from his wife and two
step-daughters, that his dear child Kitty should be treated kindly,
and harassed by none of them while he was away. Upon that condition
only, would he send them every month a handsome sum out of the liberal
payment he was to receive for his services. And he thought himself very
firm, and most sagacious—even suspicious it might be—in providing that
before he drew each cheque, he should have by post a line from his own
daughter, to this effect—“I am very happy, and every one is most kind
to me.”

Unluckily his suspicions were not very shrewd; for he forgot that
there were pens and ink and fingers at Bulwrag Park, quite apart from
Kitty’s, well able to afford him that assurance in her name, for the
gift of forgery was in the family; and his daughter was not to distract
him with letters, so long as he knew that she was comfortable.

No sooner was he off the scene, than that old rake, Sir Cumberleigh
Hotchpot, reappeared, having purposely kept away till then, for he
dreaded the simple and calm man of science. He annoyed poor Miss
Fairthorn with his odious advances, and coarse familiarity, and
slangy talk, and he took a mean advantage of her gentle diffidence
by perpetually assuming that she was pledged to him. This, and the
contempt and spiteful hatred of her stepmother, seemed more than enough
for the poor girl to have to bear; but soon a far greater distress was
added. Donovan Bulwrag, the only son of the Honourable Mrs. Bulwrag
Fairthorn—as she absurdly called herself—came home from the Continent,
where he had been engaged on the staff of some embassy, after running
from his debts; and the house, and the people, and the chattels therein
were not good enough for him to tread upon. This would have mattered
little to Miss Fairthorn (who was rarely favoured with the Bulwrag
society, except for the purpose of insults if this divine Downy, as his
mother called him), had not taken into his great yellow head the idea
that he was in love with Kitty.

This dearly loved son of his mother was a strong young man of three
or four and twenty, able to take his own part anywhere, either with
violence or with fraud, but preferring the latter, when it would do the
trick. Mrs. Wilcox said that he had three crowns to his head, which
went beyond all her experience, although she had been in a hospital.
She had known malefactors with two sometimes, and you never could tell
where their mischief began, because it started double; but she had
combed the hair of this boy once, and nothing would tempt her to do it
again. She was not superstitious, but afraid more often of being too
much the other way; and she left it entirely to the future to prove her
a fool, if she deserved it. Only let any one look at his head.

For it was not only that he was bad inside, but that he gave the same
idea at first sight, to any one having any sense of human looks. It
was not Mrs. Wilcox alone who said this, but my uncle as well, when he
happened to see the young man, while going to look for his horse. He
had notice that he might have the luck to meet him, and sure enough he
had, if there was any luck in it. And my Uncle Corny, though a man of
strong opinions, did not go so entirely by outward show.

Mr. Downy Bulwrag, as the grandson of a Lord, and likely enough to be a
Lord himself, if people in his way died out of it, had a sense of being
somebody, and liked the world to know that he was rather an important
part of it. Not that he swaggered, or stuck out his arms, or jerked
himself into big attitudes—as some bits of the human chip do—all that
he left for fellows who had yet to prove their value, and knew much
less of life than he did. His manner and air were of solid and silent
conviction, that without him this earth would be a place unfit for a
civilized race to inhabit. He prided himself, if he had any pride, upon
his knowledge of human nature; and like most who do that, he attributed
every word and every action to selfishness, spite, and cupidity. And
like the great bulk of such people again, he was truly consistent in
his own freedom from any loftier motives.

His mother’s pet name for him had been confirmed by all who had the
honour of knowing him. He was downy in manner, as well as appearance,
and (according to the slang of the day) a “downy cove” in all his
actions. No one could look at his bulky form (which greatly resembled
his father’s), enormous head furnished with bright yellow hair, soft
saffron moustache, and orange-coloured eyelashes, without thinking of
a fat, downy apricot, and fearing that he had none of its excellence.
His face, too, was flattened in its own broad substance, as that yellow
fruit often is against the wall, and bulged at the jowl with the
great socket of square jaws. But the forehead was the main and most
impressive feature; full, and round, and almost beetling, wider even
than the great wide jaws, but for its heaviness it would have looked
like the bulwark of a mighty brain; and there was room for the brain of
a Cuvier in that head.

My good Uncle Corny, meeting this man in the road, and knowing who he
was from description received, clapped his keen gray eyes with emphasis
upon him, as much as to say, “I mean to look you through, young man.”
Downy, with his usual self-esteem—which stands like a dummy at every
loop-hole, when the garrison of self-respect is gone—gazed at the
grower with a placid acceptance of rustic admiration. Little did he
dream that another creak of his boots would have brought the crack of a
big whip round his loins; for my uncle was a hasty man sometimes, and
could prove it his duty to be so. And the heavy half-somnolent look of
Downy—as if he were gaping with his eyes almost—was enough to put a
quick busy man in a rage, even if he had no bone to pick with the man
who was making a dog of him.



I HAD missed “the enjoyment of that bad weather”—as one of our workmen
called it, when he drew his wages _gratis_—through having too much at
the outset. There had been at least six weeks of frost, some of it very
intense; and it was said by those who make a study of such things, that
Christmas Day, 1860, was the coldest day known in the south of England,
since Christmas Day, 1796. And but for a break at the end of the year,
when a sudden thaw set in before the steady return of low temperature,
it is likely that the Thames would have held an ice-fair above London
Bridge; as in 1814, and as threatened again in 1838. But the removal of
old London Bridge has made perhaps a great difference in that matter.

One of the reasons why I could not get rid of the chill that struck
into my system, was perhaps the renewed attack of cold every night
through all that bitter time. For in old-fashioned houses like my
uncle’s, there was no fireplace in the bedrooms; and a frying-pan full
of hot embers, our Tabby’s device, used to set us a-coughing. Every
now and again I seemed to hear, when I called my wits together, the
crisp light glint of the gliding skate, the hollow heel-tap of the
gliddering slide, and the sharp, merry shouts of boys and men dashing
at the hockey-bung in the jagged, slippery huddle. Then more snow fell,
and the ice grew treacherous, and all was mantled in a white hush again.

But now the days were milder, and the ice had broken up, and the roads
were full of quagmires as they always are, when a long frost has gone
to the bottom of their metal; and everybody said that it was very brave
of my good Aunt Parslow to pay a guinea for a fly, and come all the
way from Leatherhead, to see if I was still alive. And it was not for
the sake of being kept warm on the road—though that was the reason
she assigned for it—that she obtained permission from Mr. Chalker to
bring his pretty daughter on the visit she was paying. Miss Parslow was
long past the age of lovemaking, and had made a sound investment of
her affections among the grateful canine race; but none the less for
that she felt an interest in watching the progress, or it might even
be the backslidings, of her own species in the fine old game. And Sam
Henderson had conquered all her prejudice against him, by riding over
more than once in the worst state of the roads, when no wheels could
pass over them, for no other purpose, as he positively avowed, than to
comfort her kind heart about her dear nephew’s illness.

“Don’t tell me,” she said, as soon as she had seen me, and cried over
me a little, for I was desperately weak; “what he wants is warmth, and
change of air, and particularly careful nursing. He will fall into a
decline, if he stops here; and then what will become of his darling
Kitty? What chance has he here in this wretched little room, like a
frog, or an empty bucket hanging in a well? And here you are giving him
gruel and tapioca! Has he ever had a pint of real turtle? Just answer
me that, Mr. Orchardson.”

“Well, no,” replied my uncle, looking at her with surprise; “I never
heard that turtle was for any but Lord Mayors. Kit has had everything
regardless of expense, that our skilful Dr. Sippets recommended him.
Perhaps you know better than he does, Miss Parslow. And the bottles of
stuff, every two hours day and night, with half a pint rubbed in at
frequent intervals, till he groans, and that shows that it has acted on
his system.”

“System indeed! There is no system in it, except to kill him, in spite
of the Parslow constitution. The roads are very soft, but I shall send
for him to-morrow, with a proper close carriage and a pair of horses.
And if you try to prevent it, let his death lie at your door.”

“There is no doubt,” said my uncle, after some consideration, “that
your house is much warmer, and better fitted up than this with warm
baths, and all that which he ought to have. And Sippets said that
change of air would be a great thing for him. I will see him, before
you go away, and if he thinks it would be safe, let it be so, ma’am.
But you must not suppose that I have grudged him anything. And a very
pretty bill there will be for me to pay.”

Miss Chalker meanwhile had made a great discovery, to wit that she had
never seen Hampton Court; and Sam Henderson, who happened to come in to
ask for me, found out that he had business there that very afternoon.
So after dining with my uncle, off they set together, and Miss Parslow
undertook to call for her companion upon her way back to Leatherhead.
Sam had gone up several pages in Mr. Orchardson’s good books, by his
rescue of me, and even more by his refusal of the handsome reward which
he might have claimed for it. And now there were very few days when
he did not come down, and offer counsel, and perhaps bring a hare or
rabbit. And my uncle liked his stories of the lords and ladies, even
when he was unable to believe them.

“Now, I am not going home without a little talk with you,” said Aunt
Parslow to her host, when the young couple had made off; “I must be
rude enough to ask you just to spare me a little time. And I don’t
think you can do much on the ground just now. It must be quite unfit to
work, after all the snow and thaw, and rain again coming on the top of
it. And the land must be so cold that the spring will be very late. You
see I know a little about gardening, too. Will you try to spare me half
an hour, as I can come so seldom?”

“I am always at the service of the ladies, however busy I may be.” My
uncle’s answer was truly polite, but not so true in other points. “The
spring will be very late, and therefore summer will find us all behind.
I mean, if we get any summer at all.”

“It is quite as likely that we shall not, and that makes it unwise
of us to be in any hurry. Mr. Orchardson, you have a special gift of
never being in a hurry. We women always envy that way of taking things,
because we cannot hope to attain to it. You know what we are, don’t

“All that is delightful, ma’am; so far as I have had any opportunity
of learning. And all that is reasonable, whenever there is nothing
particular to interfere with it. I assure you that I have the highest
respect for—for the way that you generally go on.”

“You pay me a very high compliment, sir, and I wish that we all
deserved it. But I am sure you will admit that I am reason itself, in
asking you one or two little questions. There was a little money that
fell in, as a sort of windfall, or whatever you call it, to my niece,
the mother of this unlucky Kit. I scarcely know what the exact sum was,
though of course I could easily find out. But it must have been about
two thousand pounds. I believe that it came into your possession as his
next of kin, but in trust for him of course. And I conclude that as he
has long been of age, you have handed it over to Kit himself.”

“Not I, ma’am;” cried my uncle, who was as honest as the day. “That
would have been the worst thing that I could do. I have told him of it
several times, and strongly recommended him to let me apply it for his
benefit. Kit is a sensible and upright fellow, and he knows when he
is in good hands, that he does; and he is capable of managing his own
affairs, without anybody’s interference.”

“Without even his uncle’s?” asked Miss Parslow, with a smile.

“Yes, ma’am; and without even his great-aunt’s,” Mr. Orchardson
answered, with a frown.

“I have no doubt that you have acted for the best;” the lady returned,
for she wished to do no harm, and saw that it would cost me more than
two thousand pounds to have Uncle Corny set against me. “And it is the
best thing that could have happened to him, to come into his capital
when he wants it, without having had a chance of making any hole in
it. I dare say he has not the least idea what it is. It will be a nice
little nest egg, when he wants a nest.”

“I have never let him know how much it is, and I do not mean to tell
him, till I hand it over. I have never touched a penny of it, my dear
madam; which I never would have told you, if you had shown a doubt of
me. I have allowed it to accumulate at four per cent.; and the sum
is now three thousand five hundred pounds, which will be transferred
into the name of Kit, on the day that he marries Miss Fairthorn. I
should have thought myself justified in deducting the twenty-five
pounds reward, for his stupidity in losing himself in the snow; but Mr.
Henderson will not accept it. I have kept Kit from a baby, and he was
dreadful with his clothes, and broke the backs of nearly all the books
he had at school. But I shall not charge him sixpence, ma’am. He has
worked well for me, and he can lay in a tree very nearly as well as I

“Mr. Orchardson, you are a gentleman,” cried my aunt, much impressed
with the increase of money; “and I would ask you as a favour, in return
for my inquiries, to allow me to discharge Dr. Sippet’s account.”

“With pleasure, Miss Parslow, for it will be very stiff, and the uphill
time of the year is before me. I do not pretend to be a gentleman,
madam; but I should not be a man if I wronged my brother’s baby. The
only thing I ask you is to keep this from Kit’s knowledge, and leave me
to tell him at my own time. I have hinted to him once or twice that he
has something coming; but if I were to tell him he would go and tell
his Kitty, and I wish it to be kept from all that lot.”

“He shall not know a word of it through me, I can assure you. And I
shall consider what I can do for them. But the first thing is to set
him on his legs again.”

At this very moment, I was being set by a happy little accident upon
my legs, as well as enjoying a delight which no money (at the finest
compound interest) can insure. In the corner of the room which my aunt
had so decried, and where I had passed so many miserable weeks, an
old wooden bracket with three little shelves was nailed against the
yellow-ochred wall. I had often cast my weary eyes in that direction,
and vaguely watched a spider, who was in a doleful plight, with his
legs drawn together, and no stomach left between them; such a time was
it since he had tasted a good fly. On the bottom shelf were bottles
of a loathsome disposition, pill-boxes and galley-pots, and measures
no less repulsive to good taste; on the middle shelf lay my mother’s
Prayer-book, and some papers of directions, and orders, and powders and
the like; but what was on the top shelf I could not tell, and had often
wondered languidly in the wanderings of hazy speculation. And I might
have been content to wonder still, without any guide-post of interest,
if I had not heard Miss Parslow say—“Ah, that would do him a lot more
good than those,” as she pointed to the top shelf, and then to the

For a time I forgot all about it, and fell into a little sleep of
indifference; but being aroused by the sound of plates and dishes and
the clinking of glasses down below, I longed to know what they were
having for dinner, and what was the joke they were laughing at. Then a
lovely smell of something came into the room, and my head went round
with the effort of searching itself for the name of that fragrance,
although it was nothing but fried calf’s liver, with which Mrs.
Tapscott was skilful. “Shall I ever have that again, instead of filthy
nastiness?” was all that I had sense enough to want to know; and then
I thought somehow of the starving spider, and looked to ask whether he
was dead yet.

Not only was he not dead, but clearly (after seeing rain once more upon
the window-panes) he had made up his mind that life was worth living,
and a little activity might make it more so. Where he got his stuff
from is more than I can tell, for any man would have vowed that his
meagre body could never have supplied him with the hundredth part of
the dreamiest film of a gossamer. However, he knew his own business
best, and he was at it, as if he were paid by the piece.

Being hungry myself, I could sympathize with him, while detesting his
bloodthirstiness, as every man must who lives on beef and mutton. And I
saw that he was scheming to attach his tent cords to a coign of great
vantage on the top shelf of the bracket.

“When spiders go thrumming, there is wild weather coming,” came
clumsily into my half-saved mind; and then floated into it, like a
gossamer adrift, those mysterious words of Aunt Parslow. Like the
spider, I desired to be on the move, and partly perhaps through the
very same cause—the yearning for a wholesome bit of flesh. At any rate,
being left all alone, for the resources of the establishment were at
full pressure upon hospitality, I resolved to know what was on that
shelf, though it might be my destiny to perish in the attempt.

This was not at all an easy job for a fellow who had spent two months
on his back; and my weakness amazed me, when I tried to walk, and I
seemed to be twice my own proper length. Then I burst into a laugh
at my own condition, and tried to move a little chair to help me get
along, but found it made of lead, and had to coast around it. My sense
of distance also was entirely thrown out, for the room was quite a
little one, and yet it seemed a gallery. At last by some process of
sprawling and crawling I laid hold of the corner bracket, and lifting
myself with some difficulty, contrived to grasp all that was on the top
shelf. A little pile of letters was in my right hand, and a light shot
into my eyes, and a gleam of soft warmth flowed into my heart.

Then I crawled back to my narrow bed, so nearly exchanged for a
narrower, and laid my treasure on my shrunken breast, and turned on my
side, that it might not slide away. I felt as if there were two Kits
now—one who knew nothing about it, and the other who wanted it all to
himself. And perhaps that other Kit was Kitty.

How long I continued in this crazed condition, it is impossible for
me to say; but as sure as the goodness of God is with us, it saved my
reason and my life. For by-and-by, a warmth of blood flowed through me,
and a sense of being in a large sweet world; then memory awoke, and
pain was gone, and I was like a little child looking at its mother. I
did not read a word, nor care to read; but I knew whose hand was on
my heart, and I would not disturb it by a stir of thought, but was
satisfied with it, for it was everything. And so I fell into a long
deep sleep; and when I awoke, I was a man again.



WORSE troubles than those of the troublesome body were visiting one
worth a thousand of me. Captain Fairthorn was still in Scotland, while
his fair daughter was being worried, as a lamb among playful wolves.
Without any aid her step-mother was enough to supply her with constant
misery; but even her malice was more easy to endure than the insolent
attentions of two vile men. To these the poor girl was exposed every
day; for if she took refuge in her own room, she was bodily compelled
to come down again, and her gentle appeals and even strong disdain were
treated as a child’s coquetry. There are few things more truculent to
a woman, even a very young one, than the jocular assumption that she
does not know her mind, and perhaps has little of that article to know.
Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot proceeded regularly upon that assumption; and
though Kitty had the sweetest temper ever bestowed as a blessing to
the owner and all around, this foregone conclusion and heavenly pity
(from a creature by no means celestial) drove her sometimes towards the
tremulous line which severs sanity from insanity.

For it has been said, and perhaps with truth, that the largest and
soundest of human minds could not remain either large or sound, if
all the other minds it had to deal with combined to pronounce it both
small and unsound. Under the hostile light, it could not save itself
from shrinking; it would glance about vainly for a gleam to suit its
own, and then straighten to a line with a cross at either end, like the
pupil of a cat in the fierce light of the sun.

Left in this manner without any friends, with her heart and her soul
among lions, my Kitty (although of strong substance) began to doubt
whether there is any justice. Good as she was, and clear and truthful,
and possessing that sense—which is now turned into folly by higher
discoveries—of a guiding power beyond our own, she strove to believe
that no harm could touch her, while she continued blameless. But it was
a fearful battle for a timid maiden to have to fight.

Happily both for herself and me, her enemies, before they got her
down, fell out about their lawful prey. When Donovan Bulwrag joined
the hunt, at first he was content to turn the quarry towards the other
hounds, and enjoy the distress unselfishly. But after a while, like an
eager dog, he began to kindle towards the prey, and shot forth jealous
glances, and resolved to have a nip for his own tooth. So far as such a
hound could care for anything outside his own hide, he became enamoured
of the charming chase.

His mother with her quick malignant eyes perceived it, and was furious.
Her pet scheme was that her sweet Downy, her Golden Downy as she
called him, should marry gold, and succeed to the title—which was
not improbable—restore its impoverished glory, and set her on high
triumphant. Then her proud sister at Halliford would come and sue to
be reconciled, and her daughters with the lovely hair would shine and
marry fortunes. She would cast the Professor and his grimy works behind
her, and reign as she deserved to reign.

In furtherance of this lofty plan, she had already chosen for her son
a most desirable helpmate, a lady of good birth, and yet sufficiently
akin with commerce to redden her blue blood with gold. And a very quiet
harmless girl, who would gladly fill the chest with guineas, and hand
the key to her mother-in-law. To be a step-mother to gentleness had
been a pleasant and refreshing task; but to be the mother-in-law of
wealth would afford even finer occasions of delight. She had always
been proud of her son’s strong will, and resolute knowledge of his own
mind, while they moved in the course she had marked for them; but if
they went astray, they must be crushed. With her usual promptitude she
resolved to bring the matter to a point at once.

Downy had arrived at the same determination. He had no idea of doing
what he disliked, and his mother had told him that she meant to call
upon Lady Clara Voucher (the only child and heiress of the Earl of
Clerinhouse), and expected his company that afternoon in the carriage
she had bought, but not paid for. “Very well,” he had said, “we will
talk about it;” for his sisters were present, and he preferred a single

Knowing that his mother was now alone, he came into the room with his
quiet heavy tread, and sat down, and crossed his legs, and looked at
her. Downy Bulwrag, even while he was a boy, had been able to earn
a large competence of hatred; as a young man he had increased the
stock, and throve upon it, and fattened on the butterine of his own
slimy fame. Good and simple young fellows of his own age disliked him,
from what they had heard of him; but none had the power to hate him
properly, until they had seen him. But after that they knew what to do.
They spat on the ground when they thought of him.

“What is it, Downy?” asked his mother, unwarily surrendering the
weather-gage of silence. “You look as if something had put you out. I
think it is I who have the right to be put out.”

Downy began to roll a cigarette—that ragged mummy of the great king
Nicot, which was then just beginning to cast its dirty ash about. He
wetted his fingers with a little sharp smack of his lips, but made no

“You will not smoke here,” cried his mother, already discarding the
superior maternal tone; “I never let your father smoke in my presence;
and I am sure I shall never let a boy like you.”

“Who was going to smoke?” asked Downy, with gruff contempt at this
instance of feminine precipitance.

“You may smoke, by-and-by, when you have a house of your own, and a
dear little wife to spoil you. But you are coming with me to see her,
and you must not smell of tobacco yet. For a short time you must be on
your best behaviour. Not that sweet Clara would ever object to anything
you like, my dear; but that others might take advantage of it, to make
you seem less devoted to her than you are. She is the great catch of
the season, you know, and there are so many young men after her. She
will make the best wife any man could have—so pleasant, and amiable,
and accomplished, and in spite of that so sweetly pretty. When I saw
her, the night before last at Lady Indigo’s, I thought I had never seen
any one so charming.”

“I don’t think much of her good looks.”

“Then you are most ungrateful, for she dotes on you. Her dear friend,
the Countess, said—‘Tell your noble Downy not to be frightened by sweet
Clara’s money. Her heart is entirely his. What a lucky fellow!’ And
then she sighed, for a little plan of hers has been quite upset by this
romantic episode. Oh, you are fortunate indeed, my dear; and perhaps
a little credit may be fairly due to me. Now put on the coat with the
sable trimmings. You look so foreign, and distinguished in it. And it
shows your broad chest in such a striking way. That dear Countess said
that it made her quite jealous about her dowdy countrymen. And she
thought it had something to do with your conquest.”

“I don’t mean to go at all.” The dutiful son, as he pronounced these
words, threw his bulky shoulders back, and planted one big elbow on
the arm of his easy-chair, and gazed calmly through his yellow lashes,
smiling slightly as he watched the colour rising on his mother’s dark
face. He knew that two stern wills were coming into clash; and the
victory would be for the one that did not waste itself in fury.

“Do you mean to tell me,” began the lady, trembling at heart, and her
voice becoming tremulous, “that you intend to throw away all I have
done? That you will not marry Lady Clara Voucher?”

“That is exactly what I do mean. I will never marry Lady Clara Voucher.”

“And why? Perhaps you will condescend to give some reason.”

“I mean to marry some one else. I mean to marry Kitty Fairthorn.”

His mother arose, as she generally did, when her furious temper burst
all bonds. Often enough, and too often, she had been in a tempest
of wild passion; but never till now in such a hurricane of rage. At
first she was stilled by her own commotion; and the lines of her face
twitched as with palsy.

“Tell me again,” she said, crossing her arms, and speaking with great
effort, as she stood before him, and he sat tranquil; “I cannot believe
it, till I have heard it twice.”

“Certainly, ma’am, to oblige you. I mean to marry, not Lady Clara, but
your step-daughter, Kitty.”

“You ninny, you rebel, you stubborn doll!” she had usually a fine
store of these expressions, but they seemed to desert her in this
great need, and he nodded his head at every one, as if to say, “Try
something better than that”—“You—But it is useless; you are too base to
care, you sit there, like a lump of yellow jaundice. Do you think that
a beautiful girl like Kitty—the vile, designing, artful minx; I will
throttle her, I wish I had her here. Go and fetch her, bring her to me;
I don’t blame you. But she shall pay for this, with her life she shall.
If they hang me to-morrow—”

“Come, mother, come. You have let off a good bit of steam already.
You’ll be as right as a trivet, after a few more choice expressions.
Don’t spare them, if they do you good, you know.”

“I shall never be right again. My heart is broken. I feel myself dying,
and you have killed me. You, my own son, have murdered me. Oh, good
God! What is this pain?”

She fell upon the floor, and moaned and gasped, pressing both hands
to her leaping heart, and scared of all wrath by the dread of death;
now and then she muttered prayers for mercy, broken with groans of
agony. Downy was terrified, and ran for brandy, as she began to tear
her hair, and clutch at the carpet, with shrieks growing weaker and
more gurgling. And as he ran back, his sister Euphrasia met him, and
snatched the bottle from his hand.

“You have done it,” cried Frizzy; “I knew you would. One of these days
she’ll kill herself. You go away. You’re not wanted here. She wouldn’t
take it from your hand, to save her life. I knew it must come. Get
away, get away. Don’t let her eyes hit upon you, when she rolls them;
or she will go off worse than ever. She knows everything, when she is

“Well, you women are a cure!” said Downy, recovering his strength of
mind. “I shall go to my own room, and have a cigar. You can come and
tell me, when she is all right.”

“I am not sure that she will ever be all right,” said his sister,
desiring to frighten him; “I have never seen her quite so bad as this.”

But he only answered, “What a funk you are! She shall not beat me, with
all this stuff.”

He had very little conscience, and that little—to use a stock-word
now in fashion—particularly _reticent_. And the still small voice, if
there were any, could not find much to say this time. In nothing but
the rudeness of his manner had he offended against strict right, and he
never even knew when his manner was rude, because it was his nature. He
could not help having a passionate mother, who flew into a fury when
her plans were crossed. So he smoked his cigar, and considered his next

It was plain to him now, without need of thought—for he was not good
enough to be a fool—that something decisive might be done at once. He
knew what his mother was too well, to suppose that any arguments of
his, or any regard for his feelings, would ever induce her to consent
to his marriage with Kitty Fairthorn. And he knew that Kitty did not
like him (although he had never ill-used her), and in her old-fashioned
way would regard the relation of their parents towards one another as a
bar to any marriage between them. And he knew that her money, through
her father’s neglect, had been placed out of her disposal. But in spite
of all obstacles, he meant to have her, and her money afterwards.

Up to the present time, he had feigned to be the ally of Sir
Cumberleigh Hotchpot, and to forward his suit very warmly. At the same
time he had contrived to earn some gratitude from Kitty, and to make
her look upon him as her friend in need, by flying to her rescue now
and then, and sometimes even carrying off her too insistent suitor.
This he had been doing more and more, as his passion increased, and
jealousy combined with pity on her behalf. Thoroughly despising the
older villain, for his shallowness more than his villainy, he began to
hate him also for his insolence to the fair one. Having now declared
his own intentions, he must put a stop to all that stuff.

While he was thinking much more of these things than of his injured
mother, he heard a gentle but hurried knock at his door, and in came
Kitty. She was trembling and flushed, with some excitement, and her
beautiful hair was disarranged.

“Oh, Donovan,” she cried, for she never called him “Downy.” “I have
heard that your mother is very ill, and they are quite alarmed about
her. Sarah came in such a hurry for some bottle of my father’s; but I
was afraid to let her have it, for they have no idea how to use it.
Don’t you think you had better run for Doctor Yallop? They won’t let me
in to ask them, and I am afraid to go for him without orders.”

“No, Kitty, no. It is nothing more than usual. She would never see the
doctor, if he came; and it would only set her off again. Frizzy knows
best how to manage her. She has been in a great wax, even for her;
and she is just a bit frightened, as she ought to be. It will do her
a world of good, when she comes round, and teach her to take things
easier. But you look quite startled, my dear child. Give me a kiss, and
I will tell you all about it.”

Kitty obeyed, though with some reluctance. One of her many charms was
obedience, and she had often been told in the early days, that as they
were now one family, to exchange the friendly salute was proper. But
lately she had been surprised that Downy, after long indifference to
its value, had returned to this form of expressing esteem.

The young man had meant to defer for a while a declaration which must
be unwelcome at first. But he felt sure now that the first thing his
mother would do, as soon as she was well enough, would be to fall
on the poor maiden about it, and put it in the most outrageous way.
Much better for his cause that he should speak of it himself, and win
perhaps some credit for his defiance of Kitty’s natural foe. He was
always bold in word and deed, and now he spoke with as little fear as

“You must have seen, my dear, that lately I have been growing very fond
of you. You have seen that I always take your part when people go to
bully you. And why do you suppose I do it? Why, because I am so fond of

“Thank you, Donovan. I have often thanked you in my mind, though not in
words. Placed as we are, it is quite right that we should be fond of
one another.”

“Oh, I don’t mean that sort of thing at all. My mother married your
Governor; but that would only make it natural that we should hate one
another. And there is no love lost between you and Frizzy, or Jerry
either, so far as that goes. What I mean is that I am fond of you,
as—as a fellow is of his sweetheart. And I mean to marry you, indeed I
do, as soon—why, as soon as you like almost.”

Poor Kitty looked at him, as if he must be joking; or if it were not
that, he must have taken too much wine, as he did sometimes, especially
when he had been much with Sir Cumberleigh.

“How provoking you are, Kitty! There, sit down. You will get used to
the idea in about five minutes. Why, there’s nothing surprising in it,
I should think. Though you may have thought that I was looking higher.
But I have always had my own peculiar views. I can do without money,
and rank, and all that. And I have taken a real fancy to you. This is
enough to prove it, don’t you think? Give us your flipper, as that old
rogue says; for I mean business, upon my word I do. And I fancy it
won’t stick too much in your gizzard, that the old woman rages, like a
tiger, against it.”

“I can scarcely believe that you mean this. It is utterly impossible;
I don’t know how people take such things; but to me it is simply
horrible. Never speak of it again, if you wish me to speak to you.
Promise me never to speak of it again.”

“Very well. Settle it so, if you like. At any rate, for the present.
You have got hold of some queer ideas, I suppose. High Church
crotchets, or some such rubbish. You will come to think better of it,

“And by the holy poker, she shall be glad to do so,” he muttered to
himself when she was gone; “We will try a bold stroke, my pretty dear;
and you shall come on your knees to me, to marry you.”



THERE were many worse men in the world even then—and the number
increases with population—than the gallant Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot.
The principal source of the evil in him was that he knew not wrong
from right. If he could have seen the difference, he might have been
tempted by the charms of virtue; but as that pure lady had never found
her way into his visiting list, it would be unfair to blame him for
neglecting her. He came of good family—in one sense—and a very bad
family, in another. For several generations, the Hotchpots had verified
their names, by making mixture of all moral doctrine. And the air of a
county, where the world is flat and oozy, may have helped to bring high
and low to one dead level.

That speculation is beyond the mark; though as everything is material
now, it may justly be accepted in plea for him. What is more to the
purpose, and less of problem, is the plain truth that evil blood was
in his veins, and there had never been anything to purify it. In his
early days, the influence of a strong, clear-headed, and resolute wife,
lifting him into self-respect, and sweetening his paltry bitterness,
might have saved him from his vile contempt, and made a decent man of
him. And such a chance had once been his; but he cast it by through his
own foul conduct, and it never came again. The lady married a better
man, who was able to lead her, as well as be led; and the man she had
escaped made a bitter grievance of his own miscarriage.

Now, he was one of that wretched lot—the elderly rakes, without faith
in women, respect for themselves, or trust in God. Even the coarser
advantages of life, the vigorous health, the good-will of the world,
the desire to rise, the power of wealth—all these had failed him; and
he was left with nothing but a feverish thirst for excitement, and
a dreary desire to say spiteful things, which his meagre wit seldom

For this he was hated by Downy Bulwrag, who also despised him for aping
the vices which are so much easier to youth. However, it was Downy’s
object now to ingratiate himself with this “old party;” and Downy had
long acquired the art of quenching his sentiments in his object. So he
took a cab, that very night, when his mother’s hysterics were drowned
in Cognac, and presented himself at Sir Cumberleigh’s house, in a small
square of South Kensington. He had not been encouraged to call here
often; for the Baronet (who generally misplaced his shame) was shy of
the fact that he had let the better part of his house to a fashionable
artist, while he occupied the smaller rooms himself. The visitor found
him just returned from his club, and by no means in an amiable frame
of mind, for the cards had been adverse, and he could ill afford to
lose. And he did not scruple to show his annoyance, at this late and
unexpected call.

But Downy drew an easy-chair near the fire, gave a kick to the Hotchpot
terrier (who with sound instinct had made a dash at him), and spread
his fat legs along the fender, without saying a word, till his host
had done the grumbles. And he had his revenge in his own crafty way,
for he gazed round the room, noting everything, and lifting his yellow
eyebrows now and then, or pursing up his big lips, and stroking his
moustache, as if he were conning how much—or rather how little, the
pictures, and furniture, would fetch.

“Been any auctioneers in your family?” Sir Cumberleigh’s temper was
never very good, and this appraisement of his chattels made it very
bad indeed. His intention had been to have a quiet smoke, and his nip
or two of cordial by the fire, while he went through his tablets by the
latest lights. He had thrown off his wig, to cool his brain, and had no
time to clap it on again. Frank and cheerful baldness is no disgrace
to any man, and sometimes adds a crown of goodness to a pleasant
face; but this gentleman had not that reward of gentle life; and his
bulbous pate, when naked, was what ladies call “horrid.” His restless
and suspicious eyes, and sneering mouth with lines that looked as if
nature had constructed channels for the drainage of foul words, and the
sour crop of blotches on his welted cheeks, were more than enough to
countervail expansive brow, and noble dome of curls, if there had been
any. There were none; and even Downy Bulwrag thought—“What a bridegroom
for a lovely girl!”

“You are inclined to cut up rough, old boy;” said Bulwrag, after
listening long to much that never should be listened to. “Something
disagreed with you? It must be so, as we get on in life. Well, tell me,
when you are certain that you have done exploding. No hurry. Pleasure
first; business afterwards.”

Sir Cumberleigh carried on a little more with his condemnation of all
mankind, just to show that he was not at all impressed with this aspect
of the younger man. Then his temper prevailed, as the other kept quiet;
and he said—“Out with your business, if there is any!”

“I don’t suppose it matters much to you. You are rolling in money,
after going down to your audit, and all that sort of thing. You might
like to invest a cool five hundred in a loan to me, at five per cent.
Do it, and earn my everlasting gratitude.”

“You have something good to tell me, or to put me up to. Upon my soul,
Bulwrag, I shall be glad to know it. I have three bills falling due
to-morrow. I am on my last legs, and that makes me so grumpish.”

“You have been uncommonly grumpish, Pots; and I am not at all sure that
I shall tell you anything. I like to do a kindness to a friend; but you
hardly seem to be quite that, just now.”

“My dear fellow, you never go by words. You have seen too much of the
world for that. The real friend is the man who shows you his rough
side. I do that to you, Downy, because I like you.”

“Then you can’t have much left for your enemies, my friend. But my rule
is to take things as I find them, and the same is the golden rule,
according to the law and prophets. I will render good for evil, Pots; I
will tell you of a nice little windfall for you, if you have the pluck
to keep up with luck.”

“Downy, I am up for anything. All has been against me for the last ten
days, and I should like to have my revenge of it. It would take a big
fence to pound me.”

“There’s a big pot of money the other side,” said Downy, counting
slowly on his fingers; “eighteen and sixteen make thirty-four, and
twelve makes forty-six, and Chilian eight thousand four hundred, with
the market down, should be worth another twelve, when they go up. But
put it at present quotations, and you have between fifty-four and
fifty-five thousand pounds, payable on the nail, and no trustees. It
would come in pretty well to start with, Pots, after paying the fellows
that know no better. And you might lend me the odd four thousand upon
good security. I would give you eight per cent., old fellow, and pay
you like a church.”

“What is it, Downy? Or are you trying hocus? Nothing of that sort
ever comes my way now. I have been on the wrong horse ever since last
Goodwood. And now again at Lincoln. Those cursed tips have tipped me

“It has nothing to do with turf, or tips. What do you think of our
little Kitty coming into sixty thousand pounds, for it’s worth every
penny of that, they say, and nobody to look after it, but the lucky
cove that marries her?”

“Sweet Kitty! My sweet Kitty Fairthorn; I adore her for her own sake,
without a crooked sixpence. But it sounds too good to be true, my boy.
Take a suck, and tell us all about it.”

“The beauty of it is that she doesn’t know a word of it;” Bulwrag
began to unfold his roll of fiction very recklessly, which gave it the
crackle and flash of truth. “And if we can keep her in the dark, for
another ten days or fortnight, why, a bit of pluck and gumption, and
there the job is done! You know that my excellent mother considers it
one of her strictest duties to open all the letters that come to the
house for the younger and feminine branches. She keeps the key of the
letter-box, and no one else is allowed to go near it. When I first came
back, she began to open mine; but I stopped that, quick sticks, I can
tell you.”

“She is a strong party, and no mistake. I hope she won’t want to come
and cock over my crib, when I am spliced to the heavenly Kitty. I
should get the wrong side of the sixty thousand pounds.”

“Well, this morning there came a little billet for our Kitty, sealed,
and got up, and looking no end confidential. The Ma wasn’t going to
stand that, of course; it set up her hackles that any one should try
it. She took it to her own room, and found it so important that it was
not right to let the owner know a word about it, at least until the
subject had been well considered. But she called me into council, and
my advice was to keep it dark, and make the most of it. And here is all
there is of it.

“It seems that the old scientific bloke had a sister in the wilds of
Northumberland, to whom he gave fearful offence, years ago, by blowing
her cat up, or something of that sort, and she vowed he should never
have sixpence of hers. But being better off for cash than kindred,
which is not the usual state of things, she has left all her belongings
to his daughter, straight away, in the lump, with nothing to pay but
duty. Her father will be her trustee by law, I suppose, until she is of
age or marries. But if she marries, without having it settled, which
her father of course would insist upon, why, there you are—the happy
man is master of the money, though she may go in for a post-nuptial, or
what ever they call it, kind of settlement.”

“Downy, my boy, it sounds too good to be true,” said Sir Cumberleigh,
looking at him doubtfully, but the young man’s great bulky face and
round forehead were as tranquil as an orange; “who are the lawyers? It
came, of course, from the old lady’s men of law. Was it a London or a
country firm? I don’t want to be too inquisitive, you know. But in a
manner of this sort—”

“The less you know the better, so long as you are convinced. You were
eager to marry the girl without a penny; and what motive can I have
for deceiving you? In fact, I think I have been a fool to tell you.
We could let her get the money, and what chance would you have then?
Plenty of young swells, with rhino of their own, would be after such a
pretty girl with sixty thousand pounds. And I will tell you two things,
since you seem to doubt me. In the first place, I shall insist upon ten
thou. advanced upon my note of hand at five per cent. And again for
your comfort, my mother since she heard of it won’t hear another word
of you, beloved Pots, unless I can bring her round to it. She would
naturally prefer a young soft fellow, with a fine place of his own,
where she can go and govern, when she wants a little change, as she
governs everywhere. So that will be all you get, old chap, by doubting
yours truly. Good-night, my boy. I am sorry that I ever told you.”

“Don’t be so hot, my friend. I never doubted you. All that I doubted
was my own good luck. And upon my soul, Downy, if you had had such
luck as I have, you would never place any more faith in it. Here, my
dear fellow, have a Don Pintolado; there’s not such another weed to be
got in London. And here’s a rare drop of old brandy, such as perhaps
you never tasted. It’s as old as the hills, and as soft as oil. You
must never put a drop of water with it. It stands me in two hundred
and forty shillings a dozen, and I have never let any one see it but
myself. What do you think of that now? Roll it on your tongue. The best
liquor you ever nosed is not a patch upon it. You are a good judge,
give me your opinion.”

“I never tasted anything like it, Pots. Where the devil do you get it

“Ah, I’ll put you up to that some day. But now let us have a little
quiet chat. You need not be afraid of it. Have another glass. You see
I always take it in a very thin dock-glass, made on purpose for it. If
it had not been for that I should have gone to the dogs long ago with
all my troubles. However, let us hope for an end of them soon. Fifty
thou. would set me straight, and I could get back the old place, and
give up fast life, and turn quiet Country Squire. It is time for me to
get out of all this racket, and stick to one or two solid friends like
you. Now tell me, old chap, exactly what I am to do. I’ll give you any
undertaking you think fit. Only, of course, we must keep it dark.”

“Ah, and not be in any over-hurry;” Donovan Bulwrag breathed rings of
blue serenity from the grey-edged auricula of his fine cigar, and then
said slowly, “I remember some little box you used to have, about two
miles beyond Hounslow.”

“Yes, and I have got it still, because nobody would have it. They
wanted to turn it into a poultry-breeding place when that craze was on,
but they could not pay deposit. At any rate they didn’t; and I have it
still on hand.”

“All right. Have it aired. It will be very pretty, now that the
broom and all that is coming on again. In another week or so the
nightingales will be about. Could you have a snugger place on earth to
pass your honeymoon in?”

“Twig,” said Sir Cumberleigh, “twig’s the word, with a little quiet
prodding, and a special license. But won’t she cut up rough, my boy? We
must not have abduction. It has been done in my family; but the times
were better then.”

“Kitty is not the one to cut up rough. My mother has drilled her a lot
too well for that. And if I come with her, and you are not seen till
the last, there can be no talk about abduction. All little particulars
must be left to me. You can let me your crib, if it eases you down, and
produce the agreement, if there is any row. But there won’t be any row.
You know the rule with women—smoothe over everything, when the job is

“I should like to think over it a little, Downy. I am not like a
boy who has the world on his side, when he does a rash thing in his
passion. The world has been very hard on me, God knows; and I am rather
old to give it another slap in the face. Why shouldn’t I marry the
charming Kitty, with her mother’s consent, and all done in proper trim?
Then we could go down to my old house, and have bonfires, and bells,
and roast an ox, and all that. And she could have a settlement, why
not? My lawyers could do it, so as to leave me the tin?”

“Try it on that way, if you like. How can it matter to me, beloved
Potts? There are two little stodges for you to get over. Would Kitty
ever look at you if she knew she had this money? And my mother will not
hear of you, since she saw that letter.”

“That devil of a woman!” cried the other rather rudely, forgetting that
her son received the statement of the fact. “She has always had her own
way, and she always will. Thank God that she never married me. Perhaps
she would have done it if she had seen me soon enough. If she has
turned against me it is all up, without some such lay as yours, my boy.
Not a dog can tuck his ear up without her knowing why. You could never
get your sister down there, without her knowing it.”

“She is not my sister,” said Downy very hotly; “or do you think I would
let her marry such a man as you? But the devil of a woman, as you
politely call her, goes down to my Grandfather in Wales next week, and
takes my two sisters with her.”

“Oh, then the coast will be clear, my dear boy! That makes all the
difference. You might have told me that, half an hour ago. I see my
way out of it now, clear enough. The main point will be to keep the
country lawyers quiet. Unless they get an answer to their letter pretty
sharp, they’ll be sending up a junior partner, or their London agent,
for fear of some other lawyer’s finger in the pie. That would upset
your pot. How are you to help it?”

“Nothing easier. For a few days at any rate. And that is why the job
must be tackled pretty smart. We shall send an acknowledgment in
Kitty’s name to-morrow, saying that she wishes to consult her father’s
lawyers—name of the firm of course omitted—from whom Messrs. So-and-so
will hear very shortly; and that will keep them quiet for a bit. Those
fellows make a point of never hurrying one another.”

“Capital! I know what they are too well. By-the-bye, did you tell me
the name of the gang in Northumberland? I might make a note of it.
Though I must not let them guess that I have heard of them, of course.”

“You would cut your own throat, if you did, Pots. I can tell you, if
you like, and get the letter perhaps to show you. But you had better
be able to swear, if there should be any rumpus, that you had never so
much as heard of them. And then, if you were pressed, you might admit
that you had heard some vague rumour, but paid no attention to it, as
it came from a source you had very little faith in.”

“Certainly. I could swear that without much harm. Don’t show me the
letter; I don’t want to see it. Have another drop of this wonderful
stuff. It wouldn’t hurt a child. It is as soft as milk.”

“No, not a drop. I am too late as it is. You had better keep away from
our place for the present. It would not be so well for you to receive
the sack, you see, before the great stroke comes off, next week. And
the mother might be apt to administer it, in her hasty way, you know.
Send a line to say you have got a cold, or something. And then run down
to the cottage, and begin at once to get it into spick and span. I
shall come to you every night, and report progress. Sixty thousand is a
good stake to run for.”

“But when is it to be, Downy, when is it to be? My nerves are not what
they used to be. And I shall not get a wink, till the race is pulled

“Oh yes, you will, if you go in for hard work. How can I tell the day,
till I have seen the mother off? The sooner the better, when she has
made tracks. There’s an old buffer coming to see the house, and keep
our Kitty in order. But I can do what I like with her. She’s smashed
taters after the real thing. Be of good cheer, Pots; I should say next
Wednesday, or Thursday, would see you a reformed and happy character.
Ta, ta, and remember me in your prayers.”

“I say, Downy, just one little thing,” said Sir Cumberleigh, recalling
him with some hesitation. “You must not be offended, old fellow; but
I should be so much obliged, if you would drop your habit of calling
me ‘Pots’ so frequently. It sounds so personal; although of course it
has no application to me as yet. Why, you might even do it before your
sister, and then it would be so—so unromantic. You see what I mean; no
offence, you know.”

“I tell you I won’t have her called my sister. She is no sister of
mine, nor in any way connected. If you call her my sister any more, I
shall look upon it as an insult.”

“A very great compliment, I should say,” Sir Cumberleigh pondered,
when his visitor was gone; “what the deuce makes him get in such a wax
about it? A fellow with such a batter-pudding face might be proud to
call such a girl his sister. Oh, I see why it is, what a thick I must
be! If she were his sister, he would be ashamed to be a party to this
little plant. I don’t like the look of it, and that’s all about it.
But such a poor devil must not stick at trifles. Sixty thousand pounds
would set me on my legs again. And it is not to be had by lying down
and rolling. And the sweetest girl in London, too without any cheek or
high faluting. I can soon break her in to any pace I choose. I am not
a bad fellow, only so unlucky. If this comes off, I’ll go to church
every Sunday. But I’ll take uncommon good care all the same that Master
Johnny Dory does not collar too much of the rhino. I hate that young
fellow, he is just like a yellow slug crawling in a mop.”



THERE are ever so many kinds of baskets used in Covent Garden Market,
some of good measure, and some of guess, and some of luck altogether,
like a Railway’s charges. They come from every quarter of the globe;
and the pensive public may be well pleased if it gets a quarter of its
bargain. A bushel may hold a peck more or less, according to the last
jump made upon it. The basket-makers are by no means rogues, because
the contents can make no difference to them. They turn out strong ware,
at a very high price, so many inches in width, and so many in depth,
according to tradition. Then they pat it, and pitch it down, and paint
the name upon it; and their business ends, except to get their money.
And of this they never fail; for the grower, as a rule, grows honesty
as his chief, and often only crop. But after that basket’s virgin fill,
how many meretricious uses does it undergo! The poor grower, who has
paid half a crown for it, never uses it again perhaps, until it is worn
out, and comes back to him, with a shilling demanded for his name; when
it has spent all its prime in half the shops and trucks of London.
Here it has passed through a varied course of fundamental changes,
alternately holding three pecks and five according to its use for sale
or purchase. At first it was gifted with a slightly incurved bottom,
not such a deep “kick” as a Champagne-bottle has—which Napoleon III.
vainly strove to abolish—but a moderate and decent inward tendency.
Here the rogue spies his vantage ground. Before filling it for sale, he
lays it flat upon its rim, mounts upon the concave eternal, and with a
few heavy jumps of both heels produces a bold and lofty internal dome.
Then he stuffs up the cavity round the side with a tidy lot of hay, or
leaves, or paper, and lo you have three pecks as brave as any four! But
is he going to buy by that measure? He lays it firmly upon its base,
gets inside, and jumps with equal vigour. The accommodating bottom
becomes concave, and he brings home five pecks running over into his

As honest producers, we know nothing of all this—except by the mark of
hobnails on our wicker, when it comes home with no integrity left—our
business is to fill our baskets, whenever the Lord permits us, keeping
the top fruit certainly not worse than the bottom, for that would be
Quixotic, but not a bit better than human nature, and the artistic
sense, demand of us. And there have been few greater calumnies of
recent years—though the world grows more and more calumnious—than to
call my Uncle Orchardson “Corny the topper,” as if he covered rubbish
with a crown of red or gold! A topper he was; but it was only thus—he
topped all his customers in honesty.

This explanation was necessary, and should have been offered long ago.
But I thought it as well to let people see first from his character, as
given by himself and me, that he required no such vindication. If ever
there was a man who gave good change for sixpence, ay, and took good
care to get it, too, you will own it was my Uncle Corny.

However, he used for inferior fruit, such as windfalls, or maggoty,
or undersized stuff, a cheaper and commoner form of basket, such as
the dealers call “Sallies.” These are of no especial measure, but hold
on the average about half a bushel, some of them much more, and some
a little less, and there is no name marked upon them. They come, for
the most part, with foreign fruit in them, and are often thrown by,
when emptied; and there are men about the market who collect these,
perhaps for nothing, or at any rate for very little, and sell them to
the fruit-growers, or the dealers, at prices which vary according to
their quality and the demand for them, etc. They can often be had at
a shilling a dozen, at which price they are cheap for any use; and at
times they are not to be got under sixpence apiece, but perhaps the
average is twopence. They are deeper than baskets of measure, and not
so wide, also made of much lighter wicker, and often full of stubs
inside, which would never do for best or second fruit; in fact, they
are like a waste-paper basket, such as one often sees under a table.

When I had been gone, at least a fortnight, I should say—though I
could not be certain about dates just then—to my Aunt Parslow’s at
Leatherhead, my uncle having done all his grafting by himself, for
there always was some to do every year, took a general look at his
trees, and found that the buds looked as promising as ever he had seen
them. He was rather surprised at this, not at all on account of the
long hard winter, but because of the very cold wet summer and autumn
which had preceded it. The trees would be full of unripe wood, and
sappy shoots shrivelled by the frost, and scurfy bark, and perished
boughs, and general discomfort, and sulkiness. At least everybody said
that was how they ought to be, and my uncle had never contradicted
them, preferring a little pessimism, because it is always the safer
side. And probably upon cold, wet soils, all the evils predicted had
succeeded, which would make it all the better for the places where
they failed. So that my uncle, while sympathizing warmly with all his
brother growers in their bad look-out, shook his head about his own,
and smoked his pipe, and would not speak of his chickens, much less
count them.

But, when the sun began to get the upper hand of the days again, and
the spring was looking through the hedge and into the hearts of the
trees almost, and the earth seemed ready to lift its breast, as a
maiden does for her flowers to be fixed, and every shrub that showed
a leaf had got a bird to sing to it—for a time, the best man found
it hard to make the worst of everything; and even the often frozen
grower hoped not to be frozen again this year. For the later an English
fruit-tree is in showing its white or pink challenge to the sky, the
less is the chance of unheavenly heaven descending with a white blow,
and smiting all to utter blackness. The ground had been frozen to a
depth of twenty inches by the rigour of enduring frost; and after that
the push of spring takes a long time to get down the line.

“Tompkins,” said my uncle, who was poking about with a spade, to
kill snails in some Iris roots, for no sort of winter makes much
difference to a snail; drought in their breeding-time is all they care
for much—“Tompkins, it is high time to be looking up our baskets. In
another month, those fellows will be sticking it on again.”

“That ’em will,” the long man replied. He was short of tongue, as a
very tall man, by some ordinance of Nature, almost always is—perhaps
because his fellow-creatures’ hats have endangered it while it was

“You had better go over and see old Wisk, at three-quarter day
to-morrow. You can have the tax-cart, and just see what he has. He is
bound to have a good stock now, after all the long frost and snow, on
hand. And he is pretty sure to be hard up. In June he begins to grin
at us. Get the figure for bushels, and halfs, by the gross, but don’t
order any, until I know. But if he has picked up any Sallies, you might
bring a gross at a shilling a dozen. I will give you twelve shillings;
and I’ll be bound the old rogue will be glad of a bit of ready money.”

“All right, governor.” Selsey Bill offered up one gaunt knuckle to
his hat, which had no brim to accept it; for he had improved in sense
of manners, since his wages were advanced. He had been put on, when
the days pulled out, to twenty shillings a week, with a title, not
conferred, but generally felt, of foreman of the outdoor work. He had
a shilling apiece for his children now every week, and another for his
wife, and two to think about all Sunday. And my firm belief is that if
he could have earned another by wronging us, he would have made the
tempter swallow it.

“But mind one thing,” said my uncle strongly, for he found it ruinous
to relax; “your wife’s brother I believe it is, that keeps the _Crooked
Billet_ beyond the heath, not a hundred yards from old Wisk’s place.
You need not pull _Spanker_ up, to give Mrs. Tomkin’s love, you know.”

“Right you are, governor. What wicked things you do put into a fellow’s
head!” My uncle grinned, and so did Bill, but with his long back
turned, and his hand upon his spade.

On the following afternoon, Bill acted with the truest sense of honour.
As he approached the _Crooked Billet_, the wind (for which he was not
to blame) brought him the burden of a drawling song, drawled as only
a Middlesex man—who can beat all the North and even West at that—can
troll his slow emotions forth. “Oh, I would be a jolly gardener, I
would be a jolly gardener; with my pot and my pipe, for my swig, and my
swipe; and the devil take the rest, say I!” Bill knew every nose that
was singing this, and every fist that was drumming on the table. But
such were his principles, that instead of pulling up, he let the reins
hang loose, and even said “Kuck” to old _Spanker_.

Although we had owned him so long, this horse had never forgotten his
ancient days, when he may have belonged to a brewer perhaps. For he
never could pass any hostelry of a cool and respectable aspect, with
a tree and a trough in front of it, but that he would offer a genial
glance from the corner of one blinker, and make a short step, and show
a readiness to parley. He did more than this now, for he pulled up
short, and tossed up his nose, and accosted with a whinny a horse of
more leisure, who was standing by the door.

“Wants to wash his mouth out. So do I. But I’ll be hanged if I’ll go
inside all the same.” Reasoning thus, Selsey Bill got down, for he saw
a wisp of hay by the trough just fitted to dip in the water and cool
the muzzle. But before he could hoist his long legs into the cart, as
he positively meant to do, a buxom short woman had his arm enclasped
with two red hands, and was looking up at him, with words of reproach,
but a smile of good will.

“It ain’t no nonsense, I tell you, Bill,” she exclaimed in reply to his
soft remonstrance; “come in you shall, and have a word or two inside.
I’ve got something particular on my mind. And you’ll never forgive
yourself, if you goes on like this.”

What could Tompkins do? His wife’s brother’s wife was Godmother to
nearly half his children, and she had a bit of money of her own, and no
children of her own to leave it to. “Well, only half a minute then,”
he said, to ease his conscience; “and not a drop of beer, you know.
Leastways, not till I’ve been to old Wisk, over yonner.”

“Why, the old chap’s inside! Seems a Providence to me, because now you
be bound to come in and see him. But I want to talk separate to you,
Bill. You have got such a head you know, such a way up!”

The landlady took Bill to her own room round the corner of the house,
so that no one saw him, while Spanker was linked to the post and had
some hay. And she told him such a story that his little black eyes,
which tried to look at one another over his great nose, twinkled, and
flashed, and were full of puzzled wrath. Then she brought him a pint of
mild ale, for she knew that his mind worked slowly, and required to be

“Never heered tell of such a job in my born days. Couldn’t ’a believed
it, if it wasn’t you, Eliza. You was always truth itself. But how can
you be sartin the young girl as told you is quite right in her mind?”

“Well, I can’t be certain, Bill, for she is a stranger about here. But
she looks right enough, and she was genuine flustrated. And more than
that, there’s several things that comes to back her up like. What shall
we do, Bill? That’s the point.”

“Sure enough, so it is. What does Teddy say to it?”

“Well, you know what he is. If he see a murder doing, I believe he’d
shut his eyes and ears, and whip round the corner. And besides that,
he is never no good after two o’clock; and I only heard of this about
an hour ago. So, to tell you the plain truth, I haven’t said a word
about it. And it’s no good to tell him nothing till to-morrow morning.
Not that he takes so very much, you know. But his constitution is that
queer. If you had not come by, I was just making of my mind up to put
on my shawl, and step off for the police. Though it’s three miles to
go, and then most likely never find them.”

“And if you did, I don’t believe they’d take a bit of notice.
Leastways, not, if they was disposition’d same as ours. Got never a
Justice of the peace round here, some countries they calls them a

“Nobody nearer than Colonel Bowles, and Ted was saying yesterday that
he was gone from home. No, Bill, for all I can see, there’s not a soul
to move a finger, unless ’tis you and me.”

“But what can us do? I can’t see no call for us to meddle if policemen
won’t. Enough to do with my own kids, sister ’Liza, and nobody but me
to help ’em. Well, I must be jogging.”

“No you won’t be jogging, and you’ve got to see Wisk. Where’s your
common sense, Bill? Can’t you see that he’ll stick a shilling on to
everything, if they send down here to fetch him for you. No man can
abide to be disturbed with his glass, and he expects a lot of money if
he gives it up. That’s the way all those ranters thrive; their beer
would cost three halfpence, and they gets sixpence for not having it,
and has it on the sly in their own beds. Go and see old Wisk, but not
a word of what I told you. Only you must come back to me when you have
done what you want with him. No business of mine any more than yourn,
and perhaps the best way to let things go by law, and not be called up
and lose your time, and have to pay for it, and think yourself lucky
if they don’t fine you too. That is all one gets for not winking at a
thief, Bill.”

The truth of this was too manifest to require any acknowledgment; and
Tompkins went to see Mr. Wisk in the taproom, and after much discussion
drove him to his premises, there to see and deal about the wicker
stuff. But he only got half a gross of Sallies, which proved a very
lucky thing afterwards, for Wisk had no more, or at any rate said so,
not liking the price perhaps, for they were good substantial stuff,
which also proved a happy thing before very long. Then Selsey Bill
touched _Spanker_ up, for it was getting on for dark; but he did not
like to pass the _Crooked Billet_ without calling, because he was proud
of being a man of his word.



THERE is, or at least there used to be, along the back of Hounslow
Heath, a lane, which leaves the great Western road on the right-hand
side, and goes off alone. The soil is very poor and thin, and nothing
seems to flourish much except the hardier forms of fir, and the vagrant
manner of mankind. The winter winds and the summer drought sweep over
or cranny into it; and a very observant man is needed to find much to
talk about.

But wherever a man or woman is, and whatever may be the season, one
earnest cry arises in the bosom, and it is for beer. Those nobler
beings who oust their British nature with foreign luxury, and learn to
make belief of joy in the sour grape or the stringent still, are apt to
forget, as perverts do, the solidity of the ancient creed. If a good
or evil genius had stood by Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot, or even Downy
Bulwrag, and whispered, “Have a firkin there of treble X, or Indian
Pale,” there might be now no chance for Bill to tell the things he had
to tell.

When Tompkins, with his cart half full of Sallies piled like
flower-pots, pulled up again at the wayside inn, he found it dark and
lonely. The four jolly gardeners were gone home, or at any rate gone
somewhere; Teddy, the landlord, was fast asleep by the kitchen fire,
and would so remain till roused by the music of the frying-pan; they
kept no barmaid, and the man who generally lounged about the stable was
gone to have his lounge out somewhere else.

“Good-night, ’Liza,” Bill shouted up the staircase, on the chance of
the landlady hearing his voice; but instead of any answer her step was
heard, and she turned the corner on him with her shawl and bonnet on.

“I couldn’t leave it so,” she said; “I don’t know what come over me.
But after you was gone my heart fell all a pitter-pattering. And such
bad ideas come into my head—I never did! I could no more sleep this
blessed night, without knowing more about that there business, than
I could stand on my head and strike the hours like a clock. I may be
a fool for it, and have to go before the Justices; but ease my mind
somehow I must.”

“’Liza Rowles,” replied Selsey Bill, standing nearly two feet above
her, but looking down with true deference, “if you feels that sort of
thing, who am I to go again it? You are bound to have summat in your
own mind, as was never put there for nothing, ma’am; and if it comes to
that, why, so has I.”

“Do you mean to say, Bill,” asked Mrs. Rowles with awe, not of his
height, for she was used to that, but of his thoughts coming just to
her level, “that you has had queer ideas too, about what the little
girl was a-telling me?”

“You have put it, ’Liza, in the very words as I should have put it in,
if the Lord give me the power. But I leaves all that to my wife now.
She can fit it up to meanin’, and no mistake.”

“Very well, Bill, there’s no more to be said. Off I goes with you, and
you drives round by Struck-tree Cottage, as we calls it; not that we
means to make tantrups, you know; but just to see how it looks, and
ease our minds.”

Mrs. Rowles cast a glance at the high step of the cart, for she was
not so tall as she was tender; and Selsey Bill cast a glance at her,
balancing in the fine poise of his mind, whether or no he should
venture to offer, as it were, to lift her. But he saw that it would
not be just to his wife, who might come some day to hear of it—for you
never can tell what those women will let out,—so he whipped forth his
knife, and cut the cord which bound a dozen Sallies into one spire, and
fetching out a basket, set it down upon the rim; so that Mrs. Rowles
(though of good weight and measure) taking that for her first rung went
up without a groan.

“You take next turn towards Harlington, and go along quiet as you can,
Bill;” these were her orders, when she had settled down with a clean
sack beneath her on the driving-board. “And now shall I tell you what I
believe? It may be wrong, of course; we all are liable to horrors. You
feels that yourself, Bill, though a man with such a family get’th more
opportunities, so to say?”

“And a wife,” answered Bill; “her comes first to begin with.”

“In course, her comes first in the regular way. A good and faithful
wife, and the mother of seventeen. But without such luck as that, I
knows what men is; and I say to you, Bill Tompkins, that they differs
very much. I makes the very best of them, as is the duty of a woman,
and leads to their repentance, when they has it in them. But most of
them has not, without a word against my Teddy. And I say that this
Lord Hopscotch here—if such is his name, being very doubtful—is up to
some badness, having no belief of any one down this way to right it.
Therefore you take that corner, Bill, and go on slowly till I tell you
when to stop. Mind, I don’t say I know what it is; but I can guess. We
have had a many gay doings down this way, for all it looks so innocent,
and perhaps for that same reason.”

“What can ’em want with more childers, if that way inclined?” But the
quiverful Bill dropped his essay on that subject; for there is much
more bashfulness among poor people, than among their betters, on such
topics of discourse.

Presently they came to a dark, quiet elbow of the road, or rather of
the track across the turf; for they had passed all stones and hedges
now, and the wheels went softly upon the grass and peat. A clump of
Scotch firs, bowed by the west winds, overhung the way, and made it
sombre as the grave. About a hundred yards before them was a low square
building, on the verge of the heath, and surrounded with bushes and
something that looked like a wooden palisade.

“That’s where it is. That is Struck-tree Cottage; the lightning come
down and scorched the old oak.” Mrs. Rowles spoke in a whisper, as if
herself afraid of it. “You see there’s a light in the parlour, Bill.
That’s where the villains is, I do believe, and the poor lady locked
away upstairs, maybe. Now you go forrard, and just peep in. They’ll
never be capable of suspecting nothing; and everything will be black to
them outside.”

It was quite dark now, without moon or stars. Spanker and the cart,
which was painted brown, could scarcely be descried even twenty yards
away, and the Sallies were of unpeeled osier. Bill handed the reins
to his sister-in-law, and got down in his usual lanky style. Although
he was a very hard-working fellow, nothing could drive him into quick
jerks; for his joints were loose, and were often heard to creak, when
the wind was in the east, and the air too dry.

“But if them cometh at me?” he asked with proper prudence, and a sense
of his importance to three crowded rooms at home. “Why, I ain’t got so
much as a stick to help me?”

“No fear, little Billy. Guilty conscience makes a coward. You need not
let them see you. And if they do, why, they’ll take you for the Giant
of the Heath—the old highwayman as was hanged in chains, not a hundred
yards from here. My father seed him often; and when he fell down, he
took to walking through the fuzz.”

“Oh Lor’, no more of that ’Liza! All my teeth be gone a-chatterin’.
Give us a sack at any rate, if I meets he.”

Mrs. Rowles, who was not very happy herself, handed him a spare sack
from the cart; and Bill Tompkins, with many glances right and left,
and heartily wishing himself at home, set forth towards the cottage,
walking very slowly, and carefully shunning every stick and stone that
was visible on the brown, inhospitable earth. As he passed beneath the
shattered tree, he looked up with a shudder at the jagged fork, and
naked stubs, and contorted limbs, expecting the dead highwayman to
clank his ghostly chains. Then he stole on with more courage, for he
was tolerably brave, at least as regarded fellow-beings in the flesh.

When he came to the fence, a low palisade of fir, he just lifted his
long legs over it, without casting about for any gate or door. As he
groped along the fence towards the house, he discovered a gate which
appeared to be locked, and observing that the palisade was much higher
there, he very wisely lifted this gate from its hinges, and left room
for himself to slip through at the back, if pursued, and obliged to
retreat in a hurry. Then he made his way stealthily through some low
shrubs to the corner of the cottage, and considered things.

It was quite a small building, with only four windows in front, and a
door with a little porch between them. Two windows were on the ground
floor, and two above; the windows of the downstair rooms had outer
shutters, or rather framed blinds of lattice-work, such as carpenters
call “louvres.” These were closed and fastened; but from the one on
the right of the porch a strong light came through the interstices of
the blind, and streamed in narrow slices on the misty gloom outside.
The horizontal laths were turned at such an angle, that a man of
common stature could only see the floor between them; but Selsey Bill
was almost a giant, and hearing loud voices in that lower room, he
approached the window stealthily, and standing on tiptoe, applied one
eye to the top of the framework of the blind, where he found a wide
slit between the beading and first lath. Through this he could see
nearly all that was inside, for the curtains hung back at the end
of the pole. Also he could hear pretty well what was said, for the
window-glass was thin, and the ceiling low.

There were only two men in the room, both lounging in shabby armchairs
near the fire, and smoking, yet not looking peaceful. Tompkins was
surprised at this, because he could never have his own black pipe, with
the cheapest and strongest tobacco to puff, and his own bit of fire to
dry his sodden feet, without feeling as if he could stand anything from
any one, even to the theft of his very last halfpenny by his youngest
boy Bob, who was bound to know better, with so many rascals in front of
him. And these rich gentlemen (for so they seemed) were smoking a fine
blue curly cloud, such as a poor man can only put his nose to, when
the putty is gone from the glass between him and his true superior.

Bill became deeply curious now. That gentlemen of such tip-top style,
too grand almost for the world to carry, drinking rare stuff like the
sun through church windows, and smoking (as if it was so much dirt)
cigars such as Bill knew by memory—for he had picked up a pretty fair
stump sometimes—that they should be hob-nob in this little room (no
better than his own Uncle Tompkins had), yet not at all hob by nob soft
and pleasant, and looking fit to fly at one another, for two peas—all
this must mean something as was natural for police, if only they could
be persuaded to do more than flap their white gloves in view of tricks
that were nobby. Mr. Tompkins applied a dry rasp to his lips with his
knuckles, well fitted for that operation, which had many times saved
the mouth from evil issue. Then he listened and gazed intently; as no
man can do, who has had his powers spoiled by the higher education.

“Then it quite comes to this,” said the gentleman whose face was in
full view to Bill, though by no means a fair view; “that you mean to
throw me over, after all my risk, and take the fair spoil for yourself.
I have known a good many cool things in my time; but this by long
chalks is the coolest.”

“Take it at that same temperature,” answered the larger and younger
man, who was lolling back, with the roof of his system exposed to Bill,
who perceived therein a likeness to the back of a yellow Skye dog who
has not been combed very lately; “you have let yourself in for it, for
the sake of filthy lucre; and, alas! it proves that I was entirely
misinformed. Make the best of it, old man. You have rushed into a
scrape. There is too much proof, I fear, that it is all your own doing.
The law will be down upon you, and where is your defence? There is one
way, and only one, to hush it up. The girl must marry one of us, after
what has happened. She has not got a sixpence, and she is wild with
rage. Disappoints me there, after all my mother’s lessons. Don’t think
you could tame her, Pots; but feel sure that I could. Then here I step
in, like the deuce from a machine, and magnanimously offer to make
amends for my mistake. And instead of being grateful, you set to and
slate me! Consider what a lot of that I shall have from the mother.”

“You can stand anything,” said the other, with a sigh; “but I am not
as tough as I used to be; and a row in the papers brings the duns in
by the dozen. The girl is as sweet a woman as ever looked through
a bridle. And I had set my heart upon her, when I thought she would
have money. But I could not marry her like this, and be laughed at
ever afterwards, for eloping with a pauper. Can’t you take her back
to-night, and nobody the wiser? Then perhaps I can have her, in the
proper course of things.”

“Impossible, you thick old Pots. She has not tasted bit or sup for four
and twenty hours; and her face it is a show, as the old women say. No,
it must be reeled straight off this time. You can hear her moaning now;
that old woman is a fool, and the little girl a rogue, who would betray
us, if she could. But we are all right here; and to-morrow the fair
Kitty will accept me as her deliverer. We shall make short work of it,
and you retire blameless.”

The other man began to growl, but Bill stopped not to hear him. His
righteous soul was wild already, and his mercy flowed unstrained. Now
and then there had come, as from an upper window, the sound of low
sobbing, and the weariness of woe, when some human creature finds the
whole world set against it, yet cannot get out of it to seek a better.
Bill stepped quietly round the little porch, and stood beneath the
window whence the sound appeared to come.

The window was over the kitchen, as it seemed, and the sill was about
twelve feet from the ground. But the kitchen blind was down, and
the firelight dull within. Tompkins laid his sack along the kitchen
window-sill, and stepping on it softly, could just reach the stone at
the bottom of the bedroom window. With a little groping he contrived to
get one foot upon the branch of a pear-tree, which was trained against
the house, and lifting his tall frame warily, he got his chin upon the
level of the window-sill above. The whole aperture was barred with
stout wire-netting; but the lower sash had just been lifted to throw
something out, something white like an eggshell, that flew by as Bill
drew back.

“Oh, you won’t have it, won’t you?” said a cross and cracky voice; and
Bill saw by the light of a guttering tallow-candle, an old woman going
towards a young one who lay on a low iron bed with brass knobs at the
corners. “Well, you knows your own business best, and pretty airs you
gives yourself. I tell you there ain’t nothing in it, but new-laid egg
and good sherry wine, and you see me mix it up yourself. A pretty one
you’ll be to go to church to-morrow, wi’out a bit of colour in your
cheeks, or a bit of victuals in you. Cry, cry, cry, all the blessed
day long, ’stead of being proud to stand up with a rich gentleman! My
patience with you are pretty well worn out, and a pretty dance you led
me all last night! But I’ve got something in the kitchen as will force
you for to swallow, something come a purpose this very day from Lunnon,
and directions with it for the fractious folks. Now I try you fair once
more, miss, if miss it is; and after that I try you foul, you see if I

But the lady, who lay with her face to the wall, and a mass of curly
hair shining down her black dress, would not even look round, or make
any reply, but just lifted one elbow, and then let it fall again.

“Very well! We’ll see. Just you wait ten minutes, while I has a bit
to eat myself; and then we’ll try the little tickler. Nobody to thank
but yourself, you know. If ever there was a cantankerous, sulky,
self-willed young minx, and ungrateful to boot—”

The wicked old woman, went muttering from the room, leaving the window
still open, and the candle flaring and smoking on the chest of drawers,
but locking the narrow door behind her with a rusty squeak of key.

“Now or never,” thought Bill, who would have liked, deeply respectful
as he was to the fair sex, to have taken that old hag by the throat.
With one hand he got a good grasp of the sill, while he passed the
other through the wire grating, and raised the sash a little higher, to
attract attention. But the fair prisoner was too far gone in distress
and despair to heed any light sound, or even a creak and rattle.

“Miss, Miss, if you please, young Miss!” Bill put his mouth, which
would open as wide as almost any cottage window, as far in as ever it
would go (for the wire was much in his way) and blew his voice in. But
whether it was from the “wealth of her hair”—as all our best writers
express it—or the action of the throat upon the ears (which may have
been sobbed into deafness), there she lay like a log, and as if no Bill
Tompkins had his heart throbbing only for the benefit of hers.

“Rat they women!” thought Bill to himself. “If you want ’em to hear,
can’t make ’em do it. If you wants to keep a trifle from ’em, cut both
your feet off, and walk upon your fanny-jowls. Here goes, neck or nort!”

He had pulled out a big wall-nail with a heavy shred attached, and
choosing a wide space of the wire-netting, he flung it so cleverly at
the head oppressed with sorrow, that the owner jumped up, and looked
about, and rubbed the eyes thereof.

“Hush, miss, hush, for the Lord’s sake hush!” whispered Bill, as if the
first effect of feminine revival must be the liberation of the tongue;
“it’s only me, miss,—Bill Tompkins from Sunbury. Please to come nigher,
miss, till I tell you.”

“I don’t understand. I seem lost altogether. They have locked me up
here, and they may kill me, before I will do a single thing they want
of me. What are you come for? And what makes you look at me? There is
nobody to help me—not a person in the world.”

“Lor’ bless me, if this don’t beat cock-fightin’!” As she tottered
towards the window, with both hands upon her head, the light of the
candle shone into her dazzled eyes, weak and weary as they were with
floods of tears; and she waved her fingers over them with a strange
turn of the palm (which was deeply cupped), a turn quite indescribable,
a bit of native gesture which was most attractive, and certain to be
known again, though it might have seemed to pass unnoticed. “Miss,
if I ever see two ladies in my life, you be Miss Kitty, our Kit’s

“What is the good of a sweetheart to him? Don’t tell me anything, I
can’t bear it. I was going to his funeral—his funeral, yesterday; and
they put me in a carriage for the purpose; and they lost their way,
so they said, and they brought me here. And instead of going to his
funeral, I am to marry some one else. But I won’t do it. I’ll never
marry any one but Kit; and Kit is dead, and gone to heaven.”

“The d——d liars! Did they tell you that?” cried Tompkins, as if that
would never be my destination. “Our Kit, miss, is as alive as you be;
though he have had a bad time of it, and be gone to Ludred now. We
expects him home next week, we does. And proud he would be, Miss, to
see you there afore him. There never were such a chap to carry on about
a gal, leastways beg pardon, Miss, I means a fine young lady.”

He was talking thus, because she could not speak; which he had the
human kindness to perceive. “Is it true?” she was able to ask at last;
and he answered—

“True as Gospel. S’help me Taters, miss, it is!”

Then she knelt for a moment, to thank the Lord. But Bill said—“No time
now, miss. Out of this you comes, this very minute, and home with me to
Sunbury. Can’t get out of window. Took good care of that. Come out of
door, and slip downstairs.”

“But she has locked me in,” cried Kitty, “and there are two dreadful
men downstairs. I don’t care what they do to me now, now I know what
you have told me. Go away, while you can. They will kill you.”

“Just you go to that there door, and drive back the catch with this
here knife. It’s nothing but a gallows staple; and a rap with the butt
end will send it back, ten to one it will, miss. Put your handkercher
over the lock, while you does it, and back it goes, if I know them
locks. Have the can’le handy, to see where to hit. Then down to front
door, and away to our cart. But don’t lose my knife, for the Lord’s
sake. A sensible gal has always got two pockets.”

Kitty, with her strength revived by spirit, took the big knife with an
iron butt, and easily drove back the bolt, for the staple was an open
one. Then Bill descended, without any noise, while she slipped gently
down the stairs, and in the porch he met her. The front door had been
bolted, but she drew back the bolt, and Bill took her hand, and she
stood outside.

“Halloa! What’s up?” cried a voice from inside, for the catch had
closed again with a loud snap.

“Run, miss, run; while I stop these chaps,” shouted Bill, and she ran
like a hare from a dog. For a moment or two Bill was able to hold the
brass knob of the lock against the two from within; but presently it
slipped from his hand, and the door flew open, and two men prepared to
rush out. But Tompkins threw his sack at full length over the head of
the foremost; and striking wildly down he came on his knees, and the
other fell across him. Bill made off, like a shot, while they cursed
one another; and before they were afoot again, he had slipped through
the opening of the unhinged gate and pulled it after him. Then using
his long legs rather slackly, but to great effect through the length
of their stride, he took the struck tree for his landmark, and without
thought of the ghost, soon had Kitty at his side, and they made off,
hot foot, for the cart and Mrs. Rowles.

“Here you be, here you be!” shouted that good lady; “mind the ruts. The
villains are after you.”

This was too true. Though they might not have owned that description of
themselves, two hasty men, without even a hat on, were rushing about,
bewildered by the darkness and their own excitement, and taking the
wrong way more often than the right. They fell among the furze, and got
patterns on their faces, and showed no gratitude to Nature for one of
her best gifts. But presently they spied the white nose of Spanker,
which was hanging down with wonder if he ever should get home; and then
they saw two figures in a hustle by the cart, and one was being helped
in by the long stretch of the other.

“Stop thieves!” cried Sir Cumberleigh, who was dreadfully out of
breath; and therefore perhaps he let the other form go first to stop

Then Bill turned round and faced them, and he said—“You get away! You
ain’t got no right with this young leddy. And so help me God, I’ll
smash you, if you offers for to touch her.”

He advanced with his great fists revolving like a windmill, that being
our accepted view of the “art of self-defence.”

But Mrs. Rowles cried, “No, Bill!” while the other stood amazed at the
height of his antagonist and his uncouth look; “don’t soil your hand
with him. Clap this upon his poll.”

Before Downy could guess what was meant, he was basketed. A big taper
Sally, full of sharp stubs inside, was clapped down upon his yellow
head, and fixed there staunchly, by a heavy rap from Bill’s great
hand upon its bottom. Roars of pain and stifled oaths issued from it
faintly, and the wearer fell down upon the grass and rolled, like a
squirrel in his wheel, or a dogfish in an eel-cruive.

“Little one for t’other!” cried the clever landlady; and in half a
second Hotchpot was in the same condition.

“Good-night, Gen’lemen both,” shouted Bill, as he drove off. “You goes
to trap Miss Kitty, and you gets trapped, by Miss Sally.”

Mrs. Rowles laughed so loudly at this piece of wit, that her husband
vowed he heard her plainly at the _Crooked Billet_.



“COME and see who we have got here,” wrote my uncle, not quite
grammatically; but the relatives are enough to puzzle any one who has
not had Latin antecedents—if on the strength of good spirits I may
venture upon a very ancient joke. I knew who it was; there could be no
suspense or doubt. With those very brief words of his came a little
note, in the hand that always made my hand shake.

    “DARLING KIT,” it said; “I am so sorry to hear of
    your long and fearful illness. But thank God you are
    getting better now, and will soon be as well as ever,
    I do hope. I cannot tell you what has happened, till
    you come, for it would only excite and worry you. It
    really seems as if there was something always to keep
    us from one another. But we must try to get over it, my
    dear; and if we keep our trust in a Good Providence,
    we shall. Your uncle is the kindest of the kind to me;
    and I am ever so much better, though I only came last
    night. I feel that I could wander all day long in these
    lovely gardens, with the blossoms, and the birds, and
    be as happy and as free from care as they are. But I am
    not to stay here, as your uncle thinks it better that I
    should have two pretty rooms at Widow Cutthumb’s, which
    are to be let very reasonably indeed, and I mean to
    write to ask my father for the money. You must not come
    back one day sooner, on account of my being here; mind
    that, or I shall be very angry with you. This is not
    because I do not long to see you, for you know better
    than that, dear Kit; but because I want you to get
    quite well, which is a great deal more to me than my
    own health. And so it always should be, if people love
    one another. Give my best regards to your aunt, Miss
    Parslow, and tell her that I love dogs quite as much as
    she does. And I once had a dear little dog of my own,
    but he was taken from me. Now, mind what I say; for I
    will be obeyed; at any rate until I have to swear to
    the contrary, which is never carried out by the ladies
    nowadays. My dear dear, I shall be afraid to look at
    you. They tell me you are so different from what you
    were. And I get long wrinkles up and down my forehead,
    if I ever allow myself to think of it; and though I try
    not to do it, it will come back again. But never mind;
    you will be as strong as ever when you have a good kiss

                                         “Your own Kitty.”

“Well, I call that something like a true love-letter;” my Aunt Parslow
said, when she had contrived almost to compel me to show it to her,
which I did not feel sure that I had any right to do. “That’s a true
woman, though I never saw her. She thinks of you ten times as much as
of herself; and no man can pretend to say that he repays it; even when
he happens to deserve it; which has never happened to any gentleman
I knew. You write, and you talk, and you go on with fine words, till
people who listen to you believe, that you mean to give up your own
ways altogether. And perhaps you do believe it, at the time, for you
never know your own minds at all. But about three days of it—that’s all
there is. I know it from friends of my own; though, thank God, I had
sense enough never to try it myself. And then it is, ‘Mary, could you
fill my pipe? It would be so sweet, dear, if you did it!’ Or—‘Louisa, I
must have left my handkerchief upstairs. Did you happen to notice where
I put it, dear?’ And she is fool enough to run for it, and kisses him
on the bottom step; and her life is a treadmill afterwards. Your Kitty
is quite of that sort, mind. I can see it in every word she writes.”

“Well, Aunt Parslow, and you would have been the same, if any gentleman
had had the luck to offer you upon his altar.”

“I believe I should,” she answered, with a snap at first; and then she
smiled slowly, and said, “No doubt I should, Kit. But try to be no
worse than you can help with her.”

If anything can rouse a lover’s indignation—and there are too many
things that do so—such a calm assumption of his levity and ferocity
is the first to set it boiling. “What are you thinking of?” I asked,
without even adding, “Aunt Parslow.”

“I am pleased to see you in that state of mind,” she continued; when
gratitude alone preserved me, without even a half-glance at her twenty
thousand pounds, from the murderous speech that was on my tongue. “But
you are very young, Kit. You will come to know better, when you have
had enough of this sweet Kitty. Enough very soon becomes too much. And
then what do you do? You neglect them, and think that you are very good
indeed, if you do no worse.”

Miss Parslow was not at all a spiteful woman; even too much the other
way, if that can be. And of such things she could have no experience,
because she had never risked it. But being deeply hurt, I said—“You
know best.”

She turned back into the house, with all her dogs at her heels; for
none of them cared a bit for the air of heaven, in comparison with
their own food and footstools. And I rather hoped that she would come
out, and say—“You have been very rude to me; get you back to Sunbury.”

Being in a fine large frame of mind—though the frame was too large for
its contents, I trow—what did I do, but pull out my Kitty’s letter, and
begin it all again; just as if every word of it were not in my heart
already? But it adds sometimes to the satisfaction of the heart, to be
assured once more by the eyes and brain, that they knew what they were
doing, when they brought it the good news.

The valley of the Mole was very lovely, in this flush of the fair
Spring-tide. Bend after bend, bud after bud, tint upon tint, all as
soft to the eye as the sense of them is to the spirit within; with the
twinkle of the sun stealing through them shyly, as a youth, in the
morning of his love, quivers as he glances at the beauty of his maiden.
All these delights double their enchantment to the weak, as the lights
of heaven multiply, when the eyes are full of tears.

_Jupiter_ (who was the greatest light, at least of the earth, to Miss
Parslow) ran up and sniffed at me, and said “Look out!” as clearly
as the dog of a most observant and genial writer has learned to say
it—up to the last advices. And after him came his mistress, no longer
didactic, but deprecative. The beauty of woman is that they change so
rapidly. Who does not love a Kaleidoscope?

“I have been thinking over your affairs,” she said, that she might seem
consistent; “and I find my first opinion quite confirmed. The moment I
knew what your condition was, I said—as you must remember, Kit—‘There
is only one thing to do, and the sooner we get it done the better.’ I
will not place myself under any obligation to Mr. Henderson, though I
feel that he has behaved very well, in not coming over to bother me.
I have sent down and ordered the fly with a pole—I forget what they
call it, I daresay you know—and I have ordered the green room to be got
ready. She must not think at all of her complexion in the glass. It
will be as right as ever, when she gets downstairs.”

“I have no idea what you mean, Aunt Parslow. But you must not be put
out, because I was always slow.”

“And they talk of the masculine mind! Oh dear, any girl of your age
would have known in a second. There is such a place as Leatherhead.
Isn’t there now?”

“Beyond a doubt. And you the first lady in it.”

“Very well. And there is such a place as Sunbury, and a road between
them, though not at all a good one. Well then, at Leatherhead there
is a young man, crotchety, grumpy, whatever you like to call him, but
horribly stubborn, and possessed with one idea. And at Sunbury there is
a young lady to be found, very little better, I daresay, and possessed
with the same idea, only upside down, as women are supposed to see
everything. They have got it into their stupid heads, that they cannot
live without one another. It would cost more to take the young man to
her, and perhaps he would never come back again. It is cheaper to fetch
the young lady to him; though it can’t he done under a guinea. And the
fly with two horses will start in half an hour.”

I told her she was the best woman in the world; and she answered that
I was a hypocrite, yet seemed pleased with my hypocrisy. Then we had a
debate whether Kitty would come, in which I maintained the negative,
for the sake of being convinced, not against my will.

“You are a perfect stupe,” said my aunt, with sound judgment; “you
don’t know what a woman is, half so well as _Jupiter_. Not to talk of
affection, or any of that stuff, a woman thinks ten times as much as
a man does of the wickedness of wasting money. If I went myself, she
would think I came for a drive, and her conscience would be easy. If I
sent one horse, she would hesitate a great deal, if she did not want
to come. But when she sees two horses and an empty carriage, do you
think she would let the man get all the money for nothing? It would
take four horses going the other way, to prevent her jumping in and
saying, ‘Well, I suppose I must.’ I shall write her a very pretty note,
of course. You had better not be well enough to send anything but your

I was only afraid that Uncle Corny might take it as rather a slur upon
him, to have his new visitor stolen like this. But Miss Parslow (who
was always extremely desirous to have her own way, when her mind was
made up) declared that she would make that all right with him. And so
she did by reasoning which I did not try to penetrate, and which she
put vaguely in her note to him. For it was something about clothing,
and deficiency of wardrobe, which men cannot understand, and are
impressed with readily, when the duty of paying for it falls on some
one else.

“Not that I intend to pay,” said Miss Parslow, in confidence to me,
though my uncle was led by her letter to a contrary conclusion; “but my
credit is good in Leatherhead. I shall get a few things of a becoming
style and tone for her, and have the bill made out to Professor
Fairthorn. Messrs. Flounce and Furbelow may have only got one window,
but they get their goods direct from Paris; and I see from their
circular they expect a large consignment of very chaste articles, and
the latest mode, to-morrow. It will be most fatiguing at my time of
life. But if I like the girl, as I know I shall, I can scarcely refuse
her the benefit of my judgment.”

“I think I shall go down the hill a little way, and see what they have
got in the window now,” I answered, for the two horses now had been
gone some four hours; “and then I shall know the old stuff, if they
attempt to mix it with the latest mode. You can scarcely be too sharp
in these little places. It is not that they want to cheat anybody, and
they would rather not do it to a native. But I should just like to see
how much they have got now.”

“Ah, there is a fine view from the pavement there. You can see right
into Middlesex, and even Berkshire, I am told, when the day is
unusually fine. But I never knew it fine enough to see five miles. You
might as well go and play with the dogs, my dear.”

To play with the dogs was very well in its way, and had lightened many
a listless hour, when the body was slack for its to and fro of action,
and the mind could take no food, except as a dog bites grass. Then the
tricks of the doggies, their sprightly flashing eyes, and perception
of one’s meaning almost before it knew itself, as well as their good
nature and enjoyment of a joke, and readiness to time their wits by
the slower pulse of mine—take it as I would or might, here was always
something to teach me that one is not every one.

But I could not see the beauty of this lesson now. Selfish love had
got me by the button-hole, and there never is much humour in the tale
he tells. It is all about himself, and the celestial one who sent him;
and he is so much in earnest that he cannot bear a laugh. Even the
crinolines in the little narrow window of Messrs. Flounce and Co.,
where they had to hang alternate, one high and one low, not to poke
each other’s ribs, although they reminded me of what I had seen in
church, suggested it without a single smile to follow; for my mind,
in the reverence of love, was able to people them with the sacred
form inside. And yet at any other time I must have laughed, recalling
as it did the ingenuity of ladies, who contrived in our narrow pews
to reconcile their worship of a Higher Power with that of their own
frocks. And the ladies who now go limp may be glad—when fashion comes
round in its cycle—to remember how their mothers made the best of it.
Each lady alternate stood on a high hassock, each lady intermediate
upon the church boards; and so their cages underlapped or overlapped
each other; and when it came to kneeling one could hear them all
contract. There were quite as clever women then in balloons, as those
who end in serpents now.

Vainly I looked down the hill, and vainly back at the crinolines. The
only way to get the thing desired is to leave off hoping for it. When
the sun was gone, and the silver mist was gliding like a slow-worm up
the vale, and all the good people of Leatherhead had lit their pipes
and come out to talk, I went back slowly to Valley-view, with many a
futile turn of head, and ears too ready to be deceived. But the only
wheels I heard were those of the fishmonger’s cart going quite the
wrong way, for I knew that he had been with a middle cut of salmon to
the hospitable gate of Miss Parslow.

“You had better go to sleep. Here is Betty, nearly wild,” my aunt cried
as she pushed me in; “that blessed butcher has only just sent the lamb,
and the boy let it fall in the middle of the road. I hope to goodness
she won’t come for two hours. If she does, she will want sandwiches;
and there is nothing in the house to make them of. Go and lie down,
Kit; don’t you see you are in the way? What a lucky thing I told the
man to rest the horses for at least two hours at the _Flowerpot_. When
he gets into the tap, he is pretty sure to make it four. You look as
white as a ghost, poor boy! Bother that love, it spoils everybody’s
dinner! I haven’t got a bit of appetite myself; and the first bit of
salmon for the season, except one! Go in, get in; lie down there and
roll. Why, you couldn’t even tell where to find the mint!”

This was all the sympathy I got in my distress; and when she had poked
me into the little room, or lobby, with a horsehair sofa, where to roll
meant to roll off, she locked me up, as if I had been a pot of jam;
and all I could hear was the rattle of the dripping-pan, or the clink
of the plates in the warmer. It was worse than useless to repine; so I
turned my back to everything and went to sleep.

In sleep, as it has been said of old, the fairest and sweetest gifts
of heaven descend upon helpless mortals. Then alone is a man devoid of
harm, and gone back to his innocence, and the peopling of his mind is
not an array of greed and selfishness. Then only is he far away from
malice, and corrupting care, and small impatience of the wrongs (which
only sting, when they strike himself), and bitter sense of having
failed through the jealousy of others. And only then—if his angel still
returns, though seared and scouted—does he know the taste of simple
joys, and smile the smile of childhood. What wonder, then, that his
Father comes, with returning love to him, while he sleeps?

Then if the greatest gift of God to man, that he can see and feel
while in this lower world of life, is that which was the first
vouchsafed,—the love of one, who thinks and tries to make him nobler
than herself—though she generally fails in that—how can it come more
gently to him than as it came, the first time of all, when he has been
cast into deep sleep?

It seemed to be no time for words, and even thoughts found little room.
Without a whisper or a thought, my cheeks were wet with loving tears,
and gentle sobs came to my heart, and faithful hands were locked in
mine. A sweeter dream never came from heaven; and if sleep were always
so endowed, it would be well to sleep for ever.



MISS PARSLOW, although she pretended to be rough, and to love dogs
better than the human race (for which she could give fifty reasons),
was as truly soft of heart as the gentlest woman that ever shed a tear.
She kept her own history to herself; and it never struck me that she
had any. That is to say, as concerning us men; who are always supposed
to be, but are not always, the side to be blamed, when things go amiss
in the matter of sweethearting. She had passed through some trouble in
her early days, as I found out long afterwards; but had not been soured
thereby, any more than a river has been poisoned by its tumbles in the

The spell of Kitty’s beauty and true goodness fell upon her. At first
she strove hard to make light of her, and then pretended still to do
so, when the effort was in vain; but in three days’ time it was all
over; and I felt that with all my claims of kindred, and the proud
Parslow extract of tea in my veins, I was chiefly regarded as Kitty’s
sweetheart. It was—“Where is Kitty? What would Kitty like for dinner?
Did Kitty tell you what she thought of this parasol? Tell Kitty that I
am waiting for her down the garden.” And so on, until I began to smile,
and to fear that I should never have my Kitty to myself. And the
beauty of it was that Miss Parslow seemed to think that I was not so
attentive as I should be to Miss Fairthorn.

“What did you mean, by carrying on as you did with that girl, Sally
Chalker?” she inquired one day in a very stern voice, when I had only
asked Miss Chalker if she was fond of roses. “Are you such an oaf as to
think that Sally Chalker is fit to wipe the shoes of Kitty Fairthorn?
And if it is her money that tempts you, remember that her father is a
most determined man. And there used to be such a thing as honour among
young men. What will Mr. Henderson say, when I tell him, as I shall at
the first opportunity, that you take advantage of being on the spot,
to try to cut him out with his precious Sally? And I believe that he
really is attached to her.”

There is no end of the bubbles that ladies blow, when they once begin
to dabble in love-affairs. They never can let well alone, and they have
such a knack of setting one another’s hackles up, that when I hear now
of any match being off, where I knew that the young people loved each
other, I never inquire about stern parents, but ask who the sisters and
female cousins are.

Even Kitty, the best and most sensible girl that ever wore a bonnet,
began to think at last that there must be something in all this
rubbish. I observed that she coloured, and glanced at me, whenever
Miss Chalker’s name came up, as it did pretty often, entirely through
my aunt, who would toss it about, as a dog throws a bone, when he
has exhausted all its grease. And I used to look down, as if I were
thinking very deeply. Perhaps she would love me more, if she grew

Then she began to sigh, softly at first, and not enough for me to be
sure of it; but by-and-by more deeply, as she found me too polite to be
aware of this exertion of an undoubted private right. And she used to
say—“Oh, I do admire her, so much! I think she is so lovely. Don’t you
quite agree with me, Kit?” And I used to say—“Most perfect. Can there
be any doubt about it?” And then she would not look at me, perhaps for
half an hour.

I know that this was very wrong of me—as wrong as well could be. And
I used to steal a glance at Kitty, when she was not watching, and ask
myself if any man with two eyes in his head could turn them twice on
Sally Chalker, after such a view as that. However, I did not say so;
for I felt that my darling should know better, and if she chose to be
like that, why she must, until she came to reason; and that was her
place, more than mine. But I could not bear to hear her sigh.

Miss Parslow rather enjoyed this business, which was a great deal worse
of her than anything that I did. For she herself had set it going, with
no consideration for my feelings, and no right whatever. And I think
that she ought to have healed the mischief, which she could have done
at any moment; whereas she pretended not to see it, although she was
much too sharp for that.

However, it could not go on long, and I had made up my mind to clear it
up, when I was saved the trouble. For as I sat in my favourite place,
with the lovely valley before me, and the sun sinking into a bed of
roses far beyond the Surrey hills, I heard the little pit-a-pat that
was dearer than my pulse to me, and down the winding walk came Kitty,
carrying an ugly yellow book. She had no hat on, and her hair was tied
back, as if it had been troubling her; and as soon as she saw me she
turned away her head, and hastily passed her hand over her cheeks, as
if to be sure that they were dry. Then she looked at me bravely, though
her mouth was twitching, and said—“Oh, will you do it for me, if you

“Do what?” I asked very reasonably, though I began to guess what she
was thinking of; for the ugly book was a Railway Guide.

“Miss Parslow told me to ask you. She cannot make it out any more than
I can. It is very stupid, of course; but she says that she never met a
woman who could make out Bradshaw, and she would strictly avoid her, if
she ever did.”

“But what is it I am to make out? We can’t get to Sunbury, by any line,
my darling.” When I called her that, her dear eyes shone; but she went
on, as if she were correcting them.

“What I want to make out is a good quick train, without any extra fare
to pay, from London to Glasgow; and it must arrive by daylight, though
I suppose it would have to start at night for that. But I am not at all

“What on earth has got into this lovely little head?” I made offer to
take it between my two hands, as I had been allowed to do, once or
twice, when apparently falling back in health. But it seemed to prefer
its own support just now.

“You must be aware, if you will take the trouble to think for a minute
about it, that I cannot remain here in this sort of way, living upon
a perfect stranger, although she is goodness and kindness itself; and
running into debt in a country place like this, just because I have got
no money. The only thing for me is to find out my father. He may be
delighted to receive me now, and I may even be able to help him there.
Miss Parslow has promised most kindly to lend me quite money enough to
get to Glasgow. I must write to my father by this evening’s post, and
then I shall be able to start to-morrow; only I must let him know what
train I am likely to arrive by, for his time is always occupied.”

“A very nice programme!” I exclaimed, as she smiled, or tried to smile,
at her own powers of arrangement. “But if you please, Miss Fairthorn,
what am I to do?”

“You must not ask me,” she said, turning away; “there are so many
things for you to do. Soon you will be able to be at work again. And if
you don’t like that, you can marry some one with plenty of money, and
keep racehorses. I dare say it is a nice life, for those who like it.”

“I cannot make out a word of this,” I answered; “people with money, and
racehorses! And going to Glasgow by the train all night! Do try to tell
me, dear, what it is all about.”

“It is only natural that I should go to my father, when nobody wants
me. I am not blaming any one. You must not imagine that. I have only
myself to blame, for believing that I was a great deal more than I was.”

“When nobody wants you! Oh, Kitty, Kitty, I must be gone off my head
again; and that is why you want to run away from me. Look at me
honestly, and say that it is so. I would rather give you up, dear, and
go mad by myself; than marry you, if that has once got into your mind.”

She looked at me with terror, and deep amazement; then fell into my
arms, and threw her own around me, and put up her lips as a cure for
every evil.

“How can you say such wicked things?” she whispered, as soon as I
allowed her sweet lips room. “You can have no idea what I am, if you
suppose that I should ask whether you were off your head, or on it,
when once I had given all my heart to you. But you must not have
anybody else in your head.”

“As if I ever could!”

“Oh, but yes, you might.”

“I should like to know who it could be then. As if there were any one
in all the world fit to hold a candle to my own Kitty.”

“There’s a much prettier girl in this very place, if she did not stick
her elbows out so sadly, as she walks, and put her heels on the ground
before her toes. And if she had not got—well, not quite green eyes.”

“Somebody else has green eyes, I should say, if they were not as blue
as heaven. Sally Chalker? Why, I would not touch her with a pair of
tongs. And if I did, Sam Henderson would take the poker to me.”

“Oh, Kit, can you assure me, upon your word of honour, that there is
nothing between you and Miss Chalker?”

“No, I can’t. Because there is the whole world between us, and what is
more than ten times the whole world to me, a certain little Kitty, who
has no fault whatever—except that she is desperately jealous.”

“Jealous indeed! You must never think that. I hope I have a little too
much faith in you,” she said, as she came and coaxed me with her hand,
making me tremble with her love and loveliness.

But I said, “Confess, or I will never let you go;” and she looked up
and laughed, and whispered,—

“Well then, perhaps—but only ever such a wee bit.”

Miss Chalker’s ears must have tingled after that; for I called her a
vulgar and common-place girl—which was not at all true—and a showy
dressy thing, and I know not what, until Kitty came warmly to the
rescue; for she seemed to like her very greatly, all of a sudden, and
found out that she walked quite gracefully. Then I took the hateful
Bradshaw, and tied a flat stone in it, and flung it over the tops
of the trees into the Mole. And when we went in, as the dinner-bell
rang—for Miss Parslow kept fashionable hours now—that good lady looked
very knowing, and asked with a smile which was meant to be facetious,
whether I had seen Miss Chalker lately.

“I saw her sticking her elbows out down the street, and putting her
heels to the ground before her toes,” I answered; and true enough it
was, though I had never observed those little truths before. Miss
Parslow stared, and Kitty gave me such a glance, that I resolved to
have honourable amends, or do worse.

“You won’t have much more chance of running down our local belles,”
said my aunt, as she handed me a letter; “Mr. Henderson passed in
his dog-cart just now, to see the young lady who does such dreadful
things, and he kindly brought this letter from your uncle to me. He
seems in a great hurry; how unreasonable men are! I think he might have
come and paid his respects to Miss Fairthorn, even if he did not think
me worthy of that honour. Read it aloud. He is a diamond, no doubt; but
I think he should be treated as the Koh-i-noor has been.”

Knowing Uncle Corny’s style, I read without surprise:—


    “Kit has had quite time enough to get well. I am tired
    of being here all by myself, and I want him in the
    garden, for at least three weeks before he is married,
    which I mean him to be then, if Miss Fairthorn will
    kindly agree to it. Placed as she is, she will see
    the sense of that; for it is the only way to make her
    safe. And I wish her to be married here at Sunbury,
    in our old church, where I have always had a pew. I
    shall send the tax-cart for Kit to-morrow, and he will
    arrange with the lady to come before Sunday to Widow
    Cutthumb’s, where I will take uncommonly good care
    that nobody molests her. On Sunday the banns will be
    read for the first time, with Miss Fairthorn’s full
    permission, and nobody else’s so far as I care. We
    shall hope for the honour of your presence, when the
    young people are joined together. Thanking you, Madam,
    for your kindness to my nephew, and with my best

                      “I am faithfully yours,
                                “CORNELIUS ORCHARDSON.”

“Well, my dear Kitty,” said my aunt, when I had finished; “he disposes
of you as calmly as if you were a bushel of apples, or a sack of
potatoes. I thought it was the lady’s place to fix the auspicious day.”

“You cannot expect a bachelor to be at home among such questions;”
I came to my love’s rescue, for she knew not what to say, and was
blushing, and looking down, and wondering what to make of it. “But
I must go to-morrow, if he sends for me. If old _Spanker_ came for
nothing, I should never hear the last of it. My uncle has heard
something, which we do not know of. He is prompt, and to the purpose;
but I never knew him rash.”

“I see, I see;” Miss Parslow’s voice was much subdued, for she loved
a bit of mystery, and saw tokens of it here. “Don’t let us talk about
it now, until we’ve had our dinner. Kit’s last bachelor dinner here!
We’ll have a bottle of champagne, to make us laugh a little at this
peremptory wedlock. Your uncle is a curious man; but if it comes to
that, all men are very curious beings.”

“And ladies are so, in the other sense, and the active one of the
word; but we are never known to complain of that.”

“Of course you never have any secrets. Take your everlasting in to
dinner, and I will follow you. All the world will have to do that
by-and-by, if you only keep up to this high mark of constancy and

Kitty smiled at me, and I smiled at Kitty; for we knew that any lower
mark might do for other people.

Lofty and good as she was, my aunt could scarcely be expected to see
things thus. A lady who has never been up a ladder, is afraid of
her skirts, even more than of her head. Aunt Parslow was not at all
strait-laced—for she had given up caring about her figure now—but she
did think that Kitty and I were almost too much wrapped up in one
another; and perhaps that was why, in her feminine style, she had
brought Miss Chalker, or vainly tried to bring her, in between us.

On the following day, the spring-cart arrived, with Selsey Bill’s
biggest boy sitting up to drive; and away I went, with nothing truly
settled, but everything left elastic; as happens nearly always, when
the women have their way. I promised to bring Uncle Corny to reason (as
the ladies viewed that substance), and to come back the next day but
one, if wet bandages enabled the old horse to do it again. He was wiry
enough, but his wire was stiff, and some of the connections rickety.

“Kit, you are a fool,” Mr. Orchardson said, as soon as he had done the
outside talk; “do you mean to have that girl, or not?”

I assured him that I hoped quite as warmly and wholly to marry my
beautiful darling, as I did to be alive for the purpose of doing it,
now that the Lord had restored my health.

“Then look alive,” he answered, “or you will never do it. She is not
safe even where she is. I am not going to tell you what I know, because
you would think me fanciful! only I say that if it was my case, I would
not lose a day that is not demanded by manners and decency. You have
her father’s consent, and hers. You are surrounded by wily foes. I
have explained everything to Mr. Golightly! he is a sensible man, and
he does not care twopence for Miss Coldpepper, for she never gives
a sixpence she can help towards the church. Widow Cutthumb will take
fourteen shillings a week including coals and candles. Two weeks done
properly will make three Sundays, and you will be both in the parish.
I have got an old door, which I mean to put up, to keep people from
landing in her garden, and I defy them to get into the house from the
street. I believe they don’t know where your Kitty is at present; but
they will find out; and what can that old maid, with all her lap-dogs,
do to protect her? If you mean your Kitty to be ever Mrs. Kit, you must
look sharp, and no mistake.”

I was much surprised at his urgency, but could get no more reasons out
of him. Being equally urged by love, and strong distrust of coming
dangers, I did not lose a single day, but wrote to Miss Parslow by the
very next post, because she required, and indeed deserved, to have
a voice in all we did. Then I took the young horse on the following
day, for old Spanker found himself a little stiff, and brought back
my darling to her beloved Sunbury, where she had made up her mind to
dwell. Widow Cutthumb received her with curtseys and smiles, and a very
strong sense of her own importance. For the whole village now was on
tiptoe about us, and everybody seemed to take our side.

But if I stopped to tell a thousandth part of what was said, I should
never get married, which is the main point.

It must not be supposed that my Kitty all this time had neglected her
dear father. She had written to him several times from Leatherhead,
enclosing a note or two from Miss Parslow, as well as a few little
bills for soft goods. And he had replied in the most affectionate
manner, and enclosed some cash. This encouraged her now to write for
more; and he behaved most handsomely, considering how the other party
had been making boot upon the products of his brain. But he was a true
philosopher, and money to him was not the motive power of life, nor
even the shaft, but only the lubricator. He promised to be with us, if
he could; and his wife being still away in North Wales, there seemed
to be no sound reason why he should fear to come to London. Indeed it
seemed natural that he should come, before leaving England upon his
long cruise, for the _Archytas_—as the ship was called—had now been
completed in every detail, and was trying her engines at Greenock. And
so we hoped to see him upon the blissful day.



“NEVER wur any luck in a wadding, as wur put off from app’inted day.
For why? Why, because it be flying in the vace of the Lard, as hath
app’inted ’un.”

Knowing that Tabby was very often right in her prophecies, and could
prove them right—even when they were wrong—as most prophets can, I
begged her not to say a word about that to my darling; because she was
a little superstitious, although sprung from the very highest form of
science. But science very seldom keeps its dates; and to make them
tally, we had postponed our day from Tuesday even till Thursday. For
Captain Fairthorn had written again, to say that he could not be with
us on the Tuesday, but was almost sure that he could manage it, if
we would only leave it till two days later. My uncle had frowned and
said—“Not a single hour. If his wheels and his wires are more to him
than his only child, let him stop with them. But you must leave it to
Kitty. Such a question is for her.”

Vexed as I was, I could not deny this. And she pleaded so well, though
with reason on her side, that we vented our anger on the absent man,
and only our affection and good will on her.

But the one who made the greatest grievance of it was my aunt, Miss
Parslow. She had hurried her dressmaker to the verge of mutiny, and
made her sit up (either in person, or by deputy) two whole nights, and
she felt that she would have to pay deeply for this, and now here it
was all needless! “I have the greatest mind not to come at all,” she
wrote; “and if it were for anything but pure compassion, you may be
quite sure that I would wash my hands of you. Men manage everything
in this world, even the things that they understand least; and you
will see what comes of it. If I come on Thursday, I shall be quite
unprepared; though I should have been in perfect readiness on Tuesday.”

This was a hard saying; but we agreed that she knew what she meant,
and could explain it to her liking. And seeing that the ladies were
now so full of reason, I thought that I would have another try at Miss

I had ventured to call upon that lady once, while the preparations
were in full swing; but she had said that she was not at home, and of
course she must know best, though I had seen her walking in her great
Camelia-house. My Uncle Cornelius had been of opinion that, even if
she would not honour our church with her presence, she could scarcely
escape from the duty of sending her former visitor and favourite
something very handsome as a wedding present. A silver tea-service was
the least thing he could think of, but unluckily the last thing that
occurred to her as needful. She had made it a grievance, as she wanted
one, that Miss Fairthorn should have dared to go to Widow Cutthumb’s,
when everybody in the village knew how shockingly the widow had behaved
to Mrs. Marker.

But all this appeared to me to be very small talk now; for I was in a
generous and large condition, such as is only too apt to credit all
fellow-creatures with the like expansion. It should never be said
of me, that any petty pride had prevented me from holding out the
olive-branch—whether to be gilded, or even to be peeled—at a time when
I was hoping to be crowned with myrtle. Scorning all considerations of
a silver teapot, I went to Coldpepper Manor, and rang gently.

“Missus will see you this time,” said my friend Charles, who had tasted
our strawberries many a time, when he durst not steal any more at home;
“she is all agog about you, sir, though she shams to know nothing.
Happiness to you and dear Miss Kitty, sir!”

The least I could do was to give him half a crown, for he had
always appeared to me to be a worthy fellow. He slipped it into
his hornet-coloured waistcoat, and bawled out, “Mr. Christopher
Orchardson,” as if I had come in a coach and four.

“I am pleased to see you, Mr. Orchardson,” said the lady of the Hall,
as I made a low bow; “take a chair, and tell me what you are doing. I
never hear anything that happens in the village.”

I am not at all certain what reply I made, being fluttered by the force
of habit in her stately presence. But she was better pleased by this,
than she would have been by any assumption of ease and self-command.

“Although I hear so little, a report has reached me,” she went on with
a smile which was not at all disdainful, “that you are about to marry
Kitty Fairthorn. If so, you are a wonderfully fortunate young man.”

“It would add very greatly to our happiness, madam,” I ventured to
say, though with some misgivings, “if you would be kind enough to give
us your good wishes. Miss Fairthorn has not been to call upon you,
because—because she was not sure that you would wish it. And she is
acting entirely without the consent of her step-mother, who is your
sister. I hope you will not think the worse of her for that. The lady
has never been very kind to her.”

“Kitty was quite right in not coming here; it would have placed me in
an unpleasant position. I have not seen much of my sister for years.
But I cannot enter into such matters. And you have done right in coming
to me thus. Certainly you both have my good wishes. And though Kitty
might have looked for a much higher marriage—I may say that without any
disrespect to you—I believe that she will be happier in a very simple
life. You will understand that I cannot be present—under the peculiar
circumstances. Neither will you expect me to receive Kitty here, when
she is Mrs. Orchardson; she is no relative of mine, and she has chosen
her own path. But I like her none the less, and you may tell her that.
She has plenty of proper pride, and would resent my patronage. I was
told that the wedding was to be to-day. Why have you put it off? You
are unwise.”

She looked as if she knew something which would alarm me, if declared;
but I did not presume to ask about it, and simply told her the cause of
the delay.

“You may expect him; but you will not see him,” she answered, as if she
knew more than we did; “don’t put it off another day, if you wish it to
be at all. But it is no affair of mine. Good morning to you.”

I returned in an anxious state of mind, for she had clearly dismissed
me, that I might ask no questions. And instead of going straight to
my uncle’s house, I hurried to that of the widow, to make sure that
my darling was safe, and all due care observed. After what had been
already done to Kitty, how could I tell that there was no plot yet
in store? My bodily strength was restored by this time, and I felt
myself a match for almost any man; and surely intense and incessant
devotion must vanquish unholy pursuit and vile designs. All we knew
of our enemies at present was that they had retired from the scene of
their defeat, and locked up the cottage where they had felt so sure
of victory. But my Uncle Cornelius had good reason for believing that
his premises were watched; and a couple of his men had been tempted to
drink by some mysterious stranger, who showed the greatest interest
in our ways, and works, and manners. And the worst of it was that the
river (being almost at our doors, and not frequented then as it is
now) afforded such a space for roguish travel, that there ought to be
a paling put up against it, with tenter-hooks, and wire-netting on the
top, if any man desired to keep his garden to himself. For the people
who come up, as they get away from London, seem to claim the country
more and more, and to think that it was made for nothing else except to
be a change for them; and they reason that as a river must have banks,
those banks are a part of it, and the whole belongs to them.

My beloved (who was both my banks, and the channel of all my life as
well) had not been left alone all this time, with only Widow Cutthumb
to amuse her. Otherwise she would have had a sorry time; for that widow
had but two subjects of discourse—the merits of her late husband, and
the scarcity of all vegetables. But a very sharp young lady, Miss
Gertrude Triggs, about three years older than my Kitty, being in need
of country air after an attack of nettle-rash, had kindly consented
to come and occupy the best room at Widow Cutthumb’s. At first I was
uneasy, for if Kitty were to catch that complaint, after all her other
troubles, was she likely to look well upon the bridal day? But Dr.
Sippets said that he would warrant no infection; and so Miss Triggs
came and occupied. And certainly she helped to set off the complexion,
upon which it was impossible to imagine any rash. At first, I was not
fond of Miss Triggs, for she had too much sting in her words and ways;
and I made no allowance for what she had been through. And to my mind
women should never try to sting, being apt to get the worst of it (as
even do the bees), and intended more by nature to do the honey-making.
But my poor ideas have always been old-fashioned; and I am sorry (for
the sake of others) that it should be so.

But when I came to understand Gerty Triggs, and to value her real
friendship for my dear one, I acknowledged (as a man should do) that I
had been a gaby. Not only had she protected Kitty at school, and even
lent her under-clothing when she got no supplies from her step-mother,
but she had actually made an inroad into Bulwrag Castle, to try a round
with the great lady herself, on behalf of the innocent captive. She was
rapidly discomfited, of course; she had resolved to show the truth, but
she was quickly shown the door; and though she maintained that she had
triumphed, it may have been in logic, but it was not so in fact; and
the result to herself had been this nasty nettle-rash. However, as she
got over that, and put the air of our garden upon her cheeks, I began
to esteem her, and to find her rather pretty.

It was settled by the laws of nature that she should be bridesmaid; and
Uncle Corny found another not connected much with trade, yet able to
provide her own outfit. My uncle said, though not to Kitty—for he was
quite a gentleman to her throughout—that he could not discover any call
on him to fit everybody up with gew-gaws. It was her father’s place, if
he wanted things to be done in proper style, to come and see to them
himself, or at any rate to send directions, and the money to have them
carried out. Instead of that, he had left everything to us, kept us
in trouble about the day, and perhaps driven off Miss Parslow and her
twenty thousand pounds. It was plain that he thought it a higher duty
to fit out his ship than his only child. Considering all this, Uncle
Corny was only surprised at his own generosity; but when I joined him
in that surprise, he cut me very short, and asked what I knew about
him. It was natural enough that he should be cross; and I told him so,
which only made him worse.

Nevertheless when the true day came, which I always recall with
gratitude and wonder at a grace so far beyond my merits, everybody
behaved as if there were nothing but peace and good will in the world.
We received a telegram quite early that the ship was ordered to sail
that day, and the Captain could only send his blessing. Kitty shed some
tears, but all the rest of us were pleased, because it fulfilled our
predictions. And my uncle was proud to give the bride away, and at the
same time to keep her, as he neatly said.

Miss Parslow came over in style, with a mass of white flowers piled
high on the seat before her, and wearing her silver gray silk dress,
which set her off to great advantage. And she presented the bride with
a silver basket, fit either for flowers or fruit, and containing a very
neat cheque for a hundred guineas. Sam Henderson acted as my best man,
and did everything better than I did, for I scarcely knew my right hand
from my left. Mrs. Wilcox was present, and so was Mrs. Rowles, without
whom we should never have been there, and Selsey Bill of course, and
every man who possessed a top hat in the parish. And to our amazement,
Miss Coldpepper was sitting in her curtained pew, although she had said
that she would not come. And after the service she kissed my Kitty,
and said that she would give her something by-and-by.

What my darling wore I have not the least idea, or at least I had not
on that day, though I came to know too well afterwards. But all the
men said, and nearly all the women too, that she was the fairest, and
sweetest, and most lovely of all the brides ever seen in Sunbury, which
was no little thing to say; for our village is celebrated in that way.
And she behaved with such grace and goodness, that it seemed as if
those blessings must be multiplied upon her.

Several women cried to think that she should look so Christian after
all the treatment that she had received—for Mrs. Rowles declared that
she had been in a wire cage—and if I were to try to straighten half the
crooked tales they told, I never should find any time for a separate
word with Kitty.

Only I remember that when she came and kissed me in her simple, and
loving, and bewitching way, I saw the gleam of tears in her deep blue
eyes; and when I asked (without words) what it was, she answered,—

“I should have liked to have one kiss from father.”

This proof of her tenderness increased my adoration; for an
affectionate daughter must become a loving wife. Then I took away my
treasure to be mine alone; and Kit and Kitty, for the time, are one.



NOT much time could we have together in the land of Goshen, where the
boils and blains of the ungodly world are not yet sprinkled in the
radiant air. Uncle Corny gave us for our honeymoon one week—which
has often proved much longer than the silver cord would stretch—but
we, intending all our lives to be of sparkling sweetness, cared very
little where we spent the hours, if only with each other. And perhaps
we scarcely deserved to be in a place so calmly beautiful, not so far
away as to take a cliff of money to get there, and yet having fine
brave crags of its own. Perhaps it may be found in ancient charts
as Baycliff, although it is such a quiet, homely place, without any
railway to advertise it, and I have seen some maps which were too
good to give the name. But they could not annihilate it by such petty
silence; and a pleasant seaside village is like a pleasing woman; the
less it is talked about the more it keeps its charms.

For my part, I could not see the need of going back in such hot haste
to Sunbury, dearly as I loved that desirable village. For here were
many things that we could never have there, the level space and leisure
of the many-coloured sea, the majesty of cliffs white-browed with
centuries of tempest, the gliding of white sails across the gleaming
ruffle of the cove, and the crisp, elastic sands that kept the fairy
trace of Kitty’s feet close to my great clumsy prints.

“Let us steal another week,” I said; “it is but a fleeting holiday, and
we shall never know such a time again.”

But my beloved, growing dearer every day, if that could be, gave good
advice, against her own delight, that we should not begin our married
life with selfishness. We had been so kindly treated that we must not
slur our gratitude, and forget our duties in our joys.

“And I want to see our little home,” she said, to make the best of it;
“the house that is to be all our own; where I shall keep you in order,
Kit, and make you as happy as the day is long.”

So with many a backward glance, we left that bower of bliss, and
returned to the world of work and action. And when we found what had
been done, to welcome and to please us, we could not help confessing
that our virtue was well rewarded. For Honeysuckle Cottage looked as
bright and fresh as sunrise, and the first half of May is not the time
to find much fault with nature. The earth was damp and clammy yet,
in places where the wind and sun could not get fairly into it; and
the spring was late and shivered still among the gaps it had to stop.
For one might look through a big tree yet, and see a lamp in the road
beyond it; and many of those that were being scarfed wore spangles
rather than patins. And people, who pay little heed, might stop in
doubt—if they stopped at all—and wonder if what they saw coming might
prove in the end to be a blossom or a leaf.

In our little house I had the bud, the blossom, and the fruit combined.
The bud of youth scarce come to prime, the blossom of fair womanhood,
and the fruit of sweet and golden peace, not sleepy, but sprightly
flavoured. It was a fair view from the window, but inside ten times as
fair, without the chance of adverse weather nipping hope and bright

An ancient writer (whom I had just been scholar enough to understand,
when he is easy, in his native tongue) assures us that this perfect
state is never long allowed by Heaven. According to him, and others
whom he considers wiser than himself, all the powers that govern man
are stung with envy when they see him happier than he ought to be.
Generally they take good care to have no occasion for this grudge;
but when, by any slip of theirs, a mortal has attained such pitch of
comfort and prosperity, there is no peace in Olympus, till this robber
of delight is crushed. And the more he has flourished and rejoiced, the
deeper shall his misery be.

Having only thirty shillings a week, without counting our presents
which had been put by, and paying five and sixpence out of that for the
rent and rates of our small Paradise, we scarcely can have affronted
Heaven by any gorgeous insolence. And without daring to impugn the
wisdom of true philosophers, I venture still to hold by that which we
find in larger and nobler Writ, that when the Heavenly Power stoops to
cut off our brief happiness, it is to make it more abiding, where there
is no brevity.

But we did not think of such things then; and who would be sad enough
to say that we were bound to do so? Care would come quite soon enough,
we did not care to beckon him. He must have been a doleful wight, and
born with black crape round his eyes, who could have looked at my merry
Kitty, without catching her bright smile. In the morning, when I went
to work, I carried it with me like a charm, and whenever I came back at
night, it put my memory to the blush.

For we had settled with one accord, that until I had overtaken the
large arrears of work which had lapsed behind through my long illness
and absence, there should be no time lost by any return for early
dinner. And this was better for my wife too, inasmuch as she had only
Polly Tompkins to assist her, the eldest daughter of Selsey Bill, a
very clean and tidy girl, but of small experience in cookery. I was
busy at a long peach-wall, not the red-brick one, but further down,
and the trees being large and sadly out of order, patient as well as
skilful hands were required urgently. There was a very fine crop yet
unthinned, feeble wood to be removed, robber shoots to be docked or
tamed, green-fly to be dipped or dusted, and all the other crying needs
of neglected trees to be made good. And Kitty used to appear exactly
as the old church clock struck one, with a basket of bread and meat, a
pint of ale, and a pipe filled by her own fair hands, which she used to
light for me, and then trip home, singing merrily among the trees, to
see to the business of the afternoon.

Dare anybody tell me that a wife like this would leave her dear husband
of her own accord, without a word, without a letter, leave him to
wonder, and mourn, and rage, and despair of his own life and hers? Yet
this is what all the world believed, and impressed upon me, till my
spirit failed.

“Now this is all very fine,” exclaimed my uncle, as he came round the
corner of the wall one day, and caught me in the very act of hugging
Kitty, as she was preparing to light my pipe. She was looking up and
laughing, and pretending to pull my hair, when the deepening of her
blush showed that an enemy was nigh. “This is all very fine; but how
long will it last? How many quarrels have you had already? I suppose
you are making up one of them now.”

“Uncle Corny, you are a disgrace,” cried Kitty, “a disgrace to the name
of humanity. Mayn’t I even whisper in my husband’s ear, without being
accused of quarrelling? We have never had a single word. Have we, Kit?”

“Then perhaps you will now. Here’s a telegram for you. I was going to
send Kit home with it. But as you are so uncommonly close together,
why, it saves the trouble. Hope some of your enemies are dead, my dear.”

“Hush! Don’t be so wicked,” she said, as she handed it to me, and I
opened it with my pruning-knife, and held it for her to read first. But
this required our united efforts, for it was badly written, as so often
happens, and some of the words were run together. At last we made it
out as follows:—

“Spoke _All Kites_ off Scilly May 7th. Captain Fairshort desires love
and best wishes to his daughter. Will be away two years perhaps. From
Jenkins, s.s. _Hibernia_, Falmouth.”

“_All Kites!_” said my uncle, who had read some of the Georgics, as
rendered by Dryden with lofty looseness, but never a line of Horace;
“what a name for a ship, if it is a ship! Kitty, my dear, is that the
proper word?”

“No, Uncle Corny, it should be _Archytas_. I am not sure who he was,
but rather think that he must have been a king of Sparta.”

“I know who he was,” I said, to show how much I had learned at Hampton,
though I never was much of a hand at Horace, and had only found this
out in the dictionary; “a great man of science, who measured the seas,
and the sand, and all that, but could not get to heaven, because nobody
would throw a pinch of dust upon his body. And he lay upon the shore,
imploring somebody to do it.”

“If he could call out, he could have done it for himself,” replied my
uncle, who was not poetical. “Serve him right, at any rate, for having
such a name. But I hope that your father won’t do that, my dear.”

“I think it was very kind of him, when he could not help going, and was
far away at sea, to get this kind captain of a ship they met, if we
understand it properly, to send me this farewell message from the deep.
And it makes my mind ever so much more comfortable, because I shall
have another message by-and-by, I dare say. If he meets one ship he
must meet others: and I shall always have a good idea where he is, and
have my mind relieved, when there has been a stormy night. Thank you,
Uncle Corny, you have brought me pleasant news. Kit, it is high time
for you to go on with your wall.”

In this sort of way, by making the best of everything, and thanking
everybody, even if they did not mean to do her any good, she
established in a week a sweet dominion, not over us, but within us. My
uncle, though he liked to have his little cut at her—for old men treat
young ladies as chicks to be carved—got into the habit of coming up
every night of his life to have his pipe at Honeysuckle Cottage. It may
seem very ungrateful of me, and I now feel ashamed when I think of it,
but after being hard at work all day, and having a bit of cold duck
under the wall, I thought that I might have been allowed when I came
home to tell my dear wife all my thoughts about her, and how many times
I had hammered my thumb-nail through that. But there Uncle Corny sat,
carrying on, as if I had cut off my tongue with my pruning-knife!

Kitty used to laugh, and ask me who was jealous now. But I answered,
with good reason, that the case was widely different. Miss Sally
Chalker never crossed her legs, and sat with a long pipe blowing over a
supper-table, neither did she go on talking, as if I were nobody; but
rather put me foremost, even when Kitty herself was present, and asked
what my opinion was, before she gave her own almost.

However, I made the best of my uncle’s conduct at our cottage; for it
was not only my duty, but my important interest to do so. What was to
become of us if Uncle Corny (who might be called a huffy man, and
stuck to a huff, whenever he contracted it) should take it into his
head that I was not what he used to take me for? I know that he was
full of truth and justice, according to his own view of them; but if
anything went against his liking, so did truth and justice. So I had to
sink my opinions often, even when they agreed with his, for he never
liked to have them put into any other language than his own. Kitty was
clever enough to see this, and she always praised me afterwards; but
it went against one’s sense of right, that she might say exactly what
I had said, and from her lips it became true wisdom, when it had been
simple silliness from mine. But Kitty smiled at him, and laughed at me,
and went into his heart more deeply every time she filled his pipe.

Then a new anxiety arose, and Uncle Corny had more than he could do to
lay down the law for his own affairs. The wind went into the east, with
a hard blue sky, and not a cloud in it. We had passed the date of the
“icy Saints,” as they are called in Germany, when a cold wave of air
is said to flow over hundreds of leagues of smiling land, and smite it
all into one dark frown. If I can remember, without an almanac, that
date is about the seventh of May; but I have never found it quite so
punctual here; and according to my observation, the bloom of England
hovers in nightly peril, from the middle of April to the very end of
May. It is one of the many sad things we meet, but can only fold our
hands and watch, that for nearly six weeks of the year, and in early
seasons even more, through all our level southern lands, the fruit-crop
trembles on the hazard of a single night’s caprice. The bright sun
and the lovely day delude the folk who know no better; these are the
very things that lead to the starry night, and the quiet cold, and the
white sheet over the grass at five a.m., and the black death following.
The barren grower walks between his rows of wounded blossom; there is
little harm to be seen at first, some of the petals are as fair as
ever, others are just tipped with brown; and perhaps his wife runs up
and says—“Oh, you need not be in a fright, my dear; why, they all look
as well as ever.”

But he, with deeper wisdom, and the smile of prophetic silence, pulls
out his budding-knife, and nips the fairest truss he can find of bloom.
Then he lays it in his palm, and haply with keen edge bisects the pips.
A keener edge has been there before him; a little black line passes up
from the baby stalk to the pistil. The ovary is dead and shrunken,
though the anthers still may be tipped with pink. Never shall a fruit
grow there, to swell and stripe itself with sun, to flood a plate with
sprightly juice, and in its dissolution hear some sweet voice say—“Oh,
I never did taste such a lovely pear!”

All these horrors threatened now, in spite of the lateness of the
spring. In a forward spring, they more than threaten, they come down
and smash everything. But being now so late, we began to have some
confidence, misplaced as it might be, in the meaning of the sky. And
now for the wind to go back to the east (after living there so many
months, that it ought to be downright sick of it), and the sun to go
down red and clear, like a well-grown turnip-radish, and the stars to
come out small and sharp like a lot of glaziers’ diamonds, and the
mercury in the thermometer to drop, as if the bulb had been tapped
about six o’clock, and scarcely a breath of wind to stir the fans of
radiation—it was more than enough to make any grower fetch a groan at
the day when himself was grown.

But my uncle was not of the groaning order, neither did he even
hang himself; as one of our very best neighbours did, when he saw
his thermometer at twenty-two degrees, one radiant May morning; but
his wife, who could enter into his feelings, cut him down with a
gooseberry-knife, and enabled him to grow out of it. My uncle used to
read the gardening papers; which always bloom with fine advice; and one
of them had lately been telling largely how, in Continental vineyards,
these cold freaks of heaven are met by the sacrificial smoke of earth.
To wit, a hundred pyres are raised of the rakings and refuse of the
long vine-alleys, and ready for kindling on the frosty verge. Then a
wisp of lighted straw is applied to each, when the sparkling shafts of
frost impend, and a genial smoke is wafted through, and Sagittarius
has his eyes obscured. I told my uncle that this was rubbish, at least
as regarded our level lands; though it might be of service upon a
hillside. That if there were wind enough to spread the smoke, there
must also be enough to prevent the hoar-frost, which alone need be
feared at this season. But he told me to stick to what I understood;
for these scientific things were beyond me, and my business was to tend
the fires.

But in spite of all this brave talk, he was afraid of casting a slur
upon his old experience by a new experiment. For the British workman
disdains new ideas, and there was not a man upon our place but would
say that the governor was turned cranky, if he got any inkling of this
strange scheme.

“I shall have all the stuff put there,” said Uncle Corny, “ready for
lighting, when they are gone. Those thick-heads will never suspect that
I want to do anything more than burn up the weeds, as we generally do
at this time of the year. Then as soon as we see the danger coming, you
and I will go out and attend to it, my boy. Not that I place any great
faith in it, although it seems very sensible, to those who understand
the principles, which young fellows cannot be supposed to do. At any
rate, I mean to try it. It can do no harm, if it does no good. You
need not say another word; but do just what I tell you. I wasn’t born
yesterday, as you ought to know by this time.”

I knew that well; for it takes many years to root a man into such
obstinacy. As a rule, I was much more inclined to give fair trial to
anything new than he was, and much more ready to risk money on it. But
this would cost nothing, except a little work, and that I could not
grudge him. So I told my dear wife not to be uneasy, if I did not come
home till after dark some night, for our doings depended of course
upon the weather; and the quarter of young pear-trees, which my uncle
meant to smoke, was the furthest part almost of all the premises from
Honeysuckle Cottage. Kitty smiled, and said she would come down and
see it, and roast a potato or two for our supper, and we would go home
together, when the work was done, and make Uncle Corny come with us.
Alas, how differently it all turned out!



IT was on Wednesday, the fifteenth of May, as fine a day as ever
shone from heaven, that my Uncle Corny came up to our cottage, soon
after we had finished breakfast. I had done my two hours of early
work, according to agreement, and was ready to start for the long day
now, and do my best among the trees, until it should be “blind-man’s
holiday.” It had been arranged between my wife and me that I was not to
expect her with my noonday meal, but should carry it with me, because
she was to be busy at home with a grand turn-out. We had now been home
from our bridal trip, for ten days of bliss and perfect peace, and
Kitty had declared that it was high time to give our little rooms a
thorough cleaning. So far as I could see, they might go another month
as they were, and be all the better for it; but in all such matters the
wife is supreme, and the wise man never attempts to gainsay, but only
hopes to find some of his property surviving. I had always been most
particular about scraping my shoes and then rubbing them on the mat,
not as some men do, like a dog’s feet scratching, but attending to the
welting, and the heels, and toes, until they were as clean as a dinner
plate. This trifle I mention, because some women said that we had a
misunderstanding about the mud I brought in.

Now as Kitty had declared that there must be a turn-out for she was
wonderfully fond already of our little home, I had never even asked
whether it would not do next week—as many men do, and get a sharp
reply—but feeling quite certain that she must know best, made up
my mind accordingly. Only I suggested that she ought to have Mrs.
Tompkins in to help her, instead of her daughter, our Polly, who was as
nice a girl as could be, but scarcely knew the door-knocker from the
boiler-tap. I suspect (perhaps basely) that my darling was afraid that
she would have to play second fiddle, if Mrs. Tompkins came; but be
that as it may, she would not have her; and simply asked, “How much did
I give you back on Monday, dear?” The sum had been ninepence halfpenny,
a handsome residue of the fifteen shillings, which under her own scheme
of finance, she had drawn from our revenue for the week’s consumption.
I had said that she ought to take a pound at least, but she stuck to
her figure, and would have shown a balance even more considerable, if
Uncle Corny had not dropped in with such geniality for supper. “Your
frugality is beyond belief,” said I.

“Halloa!” cried Uncle Corny, as he came in after breakfast, without
even scraping his boots, and carrying a suckering iron, which he poked
into a rose—or at least we had determined that it must be a rose—of our
new and artistic paper—“signs of it already! I expected it last week.
Going to have a turn-out, and knock everything to pieces.”

“But we don’t carry long iron hoes,” answered Kitty, pointing to the
rose which he had suckered off the wall; and he laughed and shook
hands, and said, “I had better hold my tongue.”

I quite agreed in this, for he always got the worst of it, when he
attempted to make light of Kitty; she never said anything rude, but
contrived to roll him up in his own rudeness. And perhaps it was the
liberty of saying what she pleased, after so many years of snubbing—for
the freedom of their voice must be fresh air to women—which had now set
her up in a liveliness of health, such as no one had ever seen her show
before. For instance, she had always had a soft, clear colour, not to
be quenched by her step-mother’s slaps, nor even by anxiety about her
own Kit; but now ever since she had married me, there was a richness
of bloom on her cheeks, and a delicate gloss you might almost call it,
such as may be seen in a Tea rose only, when it has been thoroughly
well managed. And now she was wearing her pink chintz wrapper, which
showed the perfection of her form, with little sprigs of flowers
climbing up it, just as if they vied with one another, for the honour
and delight of clinging closer into her. I thought that I had never
seen her look so lovely; and she knew what I thought, and her soft eyes

“Can’t stop while you look at one another; should have to stop all day,
if it came to that.” Uncle Corny was crisp in his style, this morning,
because of the frost he expected; “Now, Mrs. Kit, don’t expect him,
till you see him. He will have to keep the fires up, till ten o’clock,
for all I know; and Tabby will have something good for supper at my
place. If you can come too, it will be all the better; but after all
this kick-up of dust, you will be tired. I never can understand why
women are always dusting; they only make more.”

“We are not going dusting; that shows how little you know about it,
Uncle Corny,” my Kitty replied with proper spirit; “we are going to
have a fine good cleaning, such as you give your wall-trees with the
engine. You insist upon keeping your trees clean; but you don’t care
how dirty your boards are.”

“Boards don’t grow,” my uncle replied, as if that shut her up

“Yes, they grow dirty,” she answered in his own short style; and he
only said, “Come along, Kit.”

But he turned back, and kissed her; for he loved her dearly. And both
he and I were glad of it, when we talked about it afterwards.

Then, as he started with his swinging walk, for he was proud of his
flat back and sound joints, my dear wife came to the door, and threw
her round white arms about my neck. She had turned up her sleeves,
to show the earnest purpose in her figure, and her scolloped apron,
trimmed with pink, came nestling into my waistcoat.

“We have never been apart so long, my pet, since our wedding-day,”
she whispered, and her eyes looked wistful; “don’t expect me down
there now; for I don’t think that he wants me much. And I shall have
something ready for you, and your new pipe filled, my dear, the one I
gave you at Baycliff. I shall be lonely, I dare say; but I shall have
the clock to tell me when you are certain to be home again. And it is
high time for us to learn to do without one another.”

People talk of presentiments, as if nothing could happen without them.
I only know that I had none; but it almost seemed as if she had some,
being of a quicker mind than I. And I was glad for many a long day that
I kissed her with true tenderness, and looking back caught one sweet
smile from the corner where the white lilac stood.

All that day I was hard at work, attending to what I had in hand,
with enough of mind to do it well, or at least as well as in me lay.
And these things, when they suit the nature both enlarge and purify
it; so that a man who takes delight in all these little turns of
life, although he may be tried and harassed by the pest of plaguesome
insects, and the shifts of weather, yet shall do his own heart good,
by doing good to what he loves. Neither shall he find himself in the
humour to believe half the evil that he hears of his old friends; or
even to be sure when he goes to his letter-box, that the bill which he
finds there a month after he has paid it, may not have been sent in
again by pure mistake.

“How you are mooning!” said my Uncle Corny, who often pretended to
be rougher than he was; “that bottom branch should be at least three
inches lower. And do you call that leader straight? Why, I call it a
ram’s horn. How often must I tell you, that to make sure of your work,
you must step back, and see how it looks across the border? And here’s
a great batch of scale left to hatch at its leisure. A pretty wife
spoiled the best gardener I ever knew. You have been thinking of Kitty,
all the blessed day, I see. But put away your nail-bag, and let the net
down from the coping. What do you suppose the thermometer is now?”

“Well, perhaps about forty,” I replied, looking round, for the sun
was gone down in a rich red sky, and the air was very shrewd, and my
fingers getting cold.

“Thirty-six already, and will be thirty very soon; and twenty-two at
four o’clock, as sure as I’m a sinner. If we only pull through this,
we shall be all right. There’s a change of weather coming within
twenty-four hours. Come and have a glass of ale; and then we’ll go and
do the bonfires. When we have done, Tabby will give us a hot chop, and
then you will be home, before Kitty breaks her heart.”

I knew that our bloom, which was now beyond its prime, had escaped
very narrowly the night before, and would be in still greater peril
to-night; for these frosts always strengthen, until there comes a
change. So while he set off with his five-tined fork, I ran to the
house for my glass of beer (which I really wanted after that long day),
and another box of matches, for he thought that his were damp. And when
Mrs. Tapscott handed me the ale, she asked in a tone which made me feel

“Have’e got the gearden door locked vast?”

“What garden door do you mean?” I inquired. “There are two gates, and
there are three doors, Tabby. And what makes you ask, in that ominous

“Dun’now what hominous manes,” she replied; “but I knows what door
manes, and so ought you. Old lead-coloured door, to the back of your

“Well, I suppose it must be locked. It always is. None of our men go
that way, you know. But what makes you put such a question to-night?”

“Dun’now, no more than the dead,” she answered, “only come into
my head, as such things will. Heer’d zummat down town, as zet me
a-thinking. You zee her be locked, when you goes home.”

Before I could ask her what she had heard, the sound of my uncle’s
impatient shout came through the still air; and I hurried off to help
him, for he had more than he could well do by himself.

It was deep dusk now, and the night was falling fast. Venus, on duty as
the evening star, shone with unusual size and sparkle, above the faint
gleam which had succeeded the yellow glow after the red sundown. And
a little white vapour was rising here and there, where the low ground
leaned into the gentle slope; but there was not enough of air on the
move to draw the slow mist into lines, or even to breathe it into any
shape at all.

“Now look sharp!” exclaimed Uncle Corny, who was not at all concerned
with Nature’s doings, except as they concerned his pocket.

“I understand things; and you don’t. You will see, if you know north
from south, that I have arranged all this in a most scientific manner.
Here are fifty piles on the eastern side of all these Bonlewin, and
fifty on the north. The wind must be either north or east, when it
freezes. We light up, according to the direction of the wind.”

He wetted one finger at his lips, and held it up according to some
old woman’s nostrum for discovering what way the wind blows. And I
said—“But supposing there is no wind at all?”

“Very well. It doesn’t matter what way it is;” he had made up his mind,
and meant to have it out. “You are full of objections, because you know
nothing. There is no cure for that, but to do as you are told. You
begin at that corner, and let the air go through. I shall take this
line, and see who does it best.”

“You could never have smoked that Old Arkerate out, in this sort of
weather,” I said; and he laughed, as he always did, when that triumph
was recalled.

“I heard something about him, the other day,” he shouted, as he was
going down the row of piles; “but I can’t stop to tell you now. Remind
me at supper.”

In spite of all that we both could do, and of all his long
preparations, not a whiff of smoke would go near the trees, but all
went up as straight as the trees themselves. And I laughed very
heartily—the last hearty laugh I was to enjoy for many a day, at the
excuses Uncle Corny made for the fume that would only come into his
mouth. But he would not confess himself beaten; too genuine a Briton
was he for that. He stamped about, and used strong words, and even
strove with his broad-flapped hat, to waft the smoke, which was as
stubborn as himself, into the track it should take; till I told him
that he was like the wise man of Gotham, who shovelled the sunshine
into his barn. Then he laughed, and said,—

“Well, it will be all right, by-and-by. As the frost draws along,
this blessed smoke must come with it. You never understand the true
principles of things. Just come in and have some supper, and we will
have another look at it. You must never expect a thing to work at
first. Other people have done it, and I mean to do it. It is nothing
but downright obstinacy. Ah there, it begins to go right already! All
it wants is a little common sense and patience.”

“I shall go home first,” I said, “and see that all is right. Kitty has
got a bit for me to eat; and perhaps she will come down with me, in
about an hour’s time, if she is not too tired. You go and have your
supper, uncle.”

With this, I set off, having long been uneasy, partly perhaps at
what Tabby had said, and partly at having been so long from home.
But I whistled a tune, and went cheerfully along, for the night was
beautiful, and the trees, still piled with blossom, rose against the
starry sky, like cones of snow.

Our door was wide open, which surprised me just a little, for my
wife was particular about that. Then I went into the passage, and
called—“Kitty, Kitty!” but heard no sweet voice say, “Yes, dear!”
Neither did any form more sweet than words of kindest greeting come.
And my step rang through the passage with that hollow sound which an
empty house seems to feel along every wall. With a terrible thumping
in my breast, I turned into our little parlour, and struck against
a straggling chair. There was no light burning, the window was wide
open, the curtains undrawn, the room felt like a well, and the faint
light from the sky upon the table showed that no supper-cloth was
laid. Shouting for Kitty, in a voice of fear which startled myself, I
groped my way to the mantelpiece where the matches stood. They were
in a little ornament which we had brought from Baycliff; my trembling
hand upset it, and they fell upon the rug. I picked up half a dozen,
I struck them anyhow on the grate, and lit a small wax candle which
we had considered rather grand. The room was in good order, there was
nothing to tell any thing; but I knew that it had not been occupied for

“She is gone,” I exclaimed, though with no one to hear me; “my Kitty is
gone. She is gone for ever.”

I lit the fellow-candle, and left it burning on the table, while I
hurried to the kitchen, though I knew it was in vain. The kitchen
fireplace was gray with cold ashes; there was not a knife and fork nor
a plate set out, and the white deal table had no cooking-cloth upon it.
Then I gave up calling “Kitty,” as I had been doing all along, till I
ran upstairs to our pretty bedroom; and there I called for her once
more. When there came no answer, I fell upon the bed, and wondered
whether I was mad.

All my wits must have left me in the bitterness of woe. I seemed even
to accept it as a thing to be expected, not to want to know the reason,
but to take it like death. Who I was, I knew not for the time, nor
tried to think; but lay as in a blank of all things, only conscious of
a misery I could not strive against. I did not even pray to die; for it
seemed to make no difference.

Then up I got, with some sudden change, and the ring of my heel on the
floor, as I struck it without measuring distance, now echoed in my
brain; and anger sent anguish to the right-about. “This is the enemy’s
work,” I cried; “it serves me right for not wringing their necks, for
their cursed tricks at Hounslow. So help me God, who has made them and
me, I will send them to Him, this time.”

My strength was come back, and the vigour of my limbs, and the iron
control of every nerve. Until the sense of wrong had touched me, I was
but a puling fool. I had felt that all my life was gone, with her who
was the spring of it, and that nothing lay before me, but to put up my
legs and moan. But praised be the Lord, who has given us that vivid
sense of justice which of all His gifts is noblest, here I stood, a man
again; ready to fight the Devil, and my brethren who are full of him.



IN the calm May night, I left my desolate home, to learn the cause
and meaning of its desolation. Some men might have doubted whether it
was worth their while to trace the dark steps of their own reproach.
From what I had seen even now, I knew that my wife had left me of
her own accord. There was not the smallest sign of struggle, or
disorder, anywhere; nothing whatever to suggest that any compulsion
had been used, or even that any stranger’s foot had crossed our humble
threshold. Of this I should learn more by daylight; and I took care not
to slur the chance, by even treading the little path that led to the
old door in the wall. There was a grass edging to that path, betwixt
it and a row of espalier apple trees in full bloom now; and along that
grass I made my way, with a bull’s-eye lamp in my hand, as far as the
leaden-coloured door, of which old Tabby had asked a few hours ago.
Without stepping in front of that door, I threw the strong light upon
it, and perceived at once that it had been opened recently. It was now
unbolted and unlocked, and kept shut only by the old thumb-latch. This
I lifted, and stepped outside, keeping close to the post, so as not to
meddle with any footprints, within or without. Then I cast my light on
the dust outside, for the weather had lately been quite dry; and there
I saw distinctly the impress of my darling’s foot. I could swear to it
among ten thousand, with its delicate springy curves; for her feet in
their boots had the shapely arch and rise of a small ox-tongue; and
ladies did not wear peg-heels then, to make flat feet seem vaulted.

By the side of that comely footprint were the marks of a coarser
and commonplace shoe, short and square, and as wide as it was long,
probably the sign pedal of a clod-hopping country boy, or lad. Of
these there were some half-dozen, as if the boy had stamped about as
he entered, and repeated the process when he returned. “I will examine
these carefully, when the sun is up,” thought I; “I must see to other
matters now.”

So I hurried at once, by the shortest track, to the lower corner of
the gardens, where my uncle Corny lived. Tabby Tapscott was gone home,
and the house all dark and fast asleep, for I must have lost an hour
in my agony on the bed, besides all the other time wasted. At last my
thunderous knocks disturbed even the sound sleep of the grower; and he
flung up a window, and looked out, with a nightcap over his frizz of
white hair.

“It is no time for anger,” I replied to his hot exclamations; “come,
and let me in. I want your advice. I am ruined.”

My uncle was thoroughly good at heart; when he came down with a light,
and saw the ghost he had let in, he was very little better than his
visitor. He shook, as if old age were come upon him suddenly, while I
tried to tell my tale.

“My Kitty gone, and gone of her own accord!” he cried, as if he, and
not I, had lost her. “Man, you must be mad. Are you walking in your

“God send that I may be! But when shall I awake?”

The old man’s distress, and his trembling anguish, let loose all the
floods of mine; I fell against the wall, where he hung his hats and
saws, and sobbed like a woman who has lost her only child.

“Come, come,” he said; “we shall both be ashamed of this. Your darling
is not dead, my boy; but only lured away by some d——d trick. Don’t
blame yourself, or her. I will answer for her, sooner than I would for
myself in this bad world. You shall have her back again, Kit; you
shall have her back again. There is a God, who never lets us perish,
while we stick to Him.”

“I have not stuck to Him. I have stuck to her.” The truth of my words
came upon me like a flash. It was the first time I had even thought of

“Never mind. He knows; and He meant it so,” my uncle replied with some
theology of his own; “no man will be punished for doing what the Bible
orders. You’ll see, my dear boy, it will all come right. You will live
to laugh at this infernal trick. And I hope to the Lord, that I shall
be alive to grin with you. Cheer up, old fellow. What would your Kitty
think, to see you knock under to a bit of rigmarole? You must keep up
your spirits for poor Kitty’s sake.”

To see an old man show more pluck than a young one, and to take in a
little of his fine faith, set me on my pins again, more than any one
would believe; and I followed him into his kitchen, where the remnants
of the fire were not quite dead.

“Now blow it up, Kit,” he said; “and put a bit of wood in. Tabby
always leaves it in this cupboard. Ah, that was a fine tree, that old
Jargonel! It lived on its bark, I believe, for about a score of years,
and you helped to split it up, when you were courting Kitty. You shall
court her again, my boy, and have another honeymoon, as they’ve cut
yours short in this confounded way. Now, make a good fire, while I
put my breeches on. You look like a ghost, that has never had a bit
to eat. And I don’t suppose you have touched a morsel to speak of,
since breakfast. ‘Never say die’ is my motto, Kit. We’ll be at the
Police-office, by three o’clock. We can do nothing till then, you know.”

Even as he spoke, his ancient cuckoo sang out one o’clock; and I obeyed
his orders, and even found a little comfort in the thought, that Kitty
would have smiled to see my clumsy efforts; for she was very knowing
about making fires up. When I had contrived to eat a bit of something,
which my uncle warmed up for me, though I never knew what it was, he
gave me a glass of old ale, and took a drop himself; and we talked of
our calamity, until it was time to go. He asked me whether anything
within the last few days could be called to mind that bore at all upon
this sudden mystery. Whether any jarring words, however little thought
of, had passed between my wife and me, as is sometimes the case, even
when a couple are all in all to one another. But I could remember none,
nor any approach to such a thing; and I had never seen a frown upon my
darling’s forehead.

Then he told me what he had heard about his former tenant, Harker,
the man whom he ejected by a fumigating process, much more successful
than the ejectment of the frost. It was nothing more than this, and
even this perhaps a piece of idle village gossip. Old Arkerate had
taken much amiss his tardy expulsion, for he meant to live rent-free
through winter, and had been heard to say that he would be—something
anticipatory perhaps of his final doom—if that blessed young couple
should be in his house very long. For he knew a trick worth two of
that. And if he had been smoked out, hang them, they should be burned

I agreed with my uncle that such stuff as this was not worth repeating,
especially as nothing of the kind had come to pass; and yet again
it appeared suspicious that the door through which my dear wife had
vanished should be the very one which old Harker had used for his
special entrance and exit; while he had even been jealous of any
attempt on the part of the owners to use it. But my uncle and myself
were uncommonly poor hands at anything akin to spying. Our rule had
always been to accept small fibs (such as every man receives by the
dozen daily) without passing them through a fine sieve; which if any
man does, he will have little time for any other employment.

“Take this big stick, Kit; I brought it for the purpose,” said my
uncle, when I had knocked a dozen times in vain, at the door of
Sergeant Biggs, our head policeman; “it is the toughest bit of stuff I
have ever handled. It will go through the panel of the door, before it
breaks. Don’t be afraid, my boy; take both hands; but let me get out of
the way, before you swing it. Ah, that ought to bring him out. But we
must make allowance for the strength of his sleep, because he has such
practice at it, all day long.”

Our police force at that time consisted of two men, Sergeant Biggs the
chief officer, and Constable Turnover; very good men both, and highly
popular. They were not paid by any means according to their merits;
and we always got up a Christmas-box for them, which put them on their
honour not to make a fuss for nothing. It is wise of every place to
keep its policemen in good humour; otherwise it gets a shocking name,
without deserving it.

“Coming, master, coming. Don’t you be in such a hurry,” we heard a very
reasonable voice reply at last. “Got one leg into these here breeches,
and can’t get in the other, ’cos they wasn’t made for me. Ah, there
goes that blessed stair into my bad leg again! They promised to mend
it, last Lady Day twelve-month; but mend it they won’t, till I’ve got
a running sore. Now, gents both, what can I do for you? Always at the
post of duty. That’s the motto of the Force. Why, bless me, if it isn’t
Mr. Orchardson! Any delinquents in your garden, sir?”

“Ever so much worse than that,” replied my uncle; “Biggs, are you wide
awake? A dreadful thing has happened. Where is Turnover? We shall want
you both at once.”

“On duty, sir; patrolling—unless he have turned in. But he’s very good
for that, when I looks after him. Which I do pretty sharp, as he knows
to his credit. A very active constable is Turnover. But come inside,
Mr. Orchardson. Don’t stand out in the cold, sir.”

There was a streak of dawn among the trees towards Hampton, and the
white frost-fog had rolled up from the river; and I saw that a dark
cloud was gathering in the south. The change that my uncle had foretold
was coming even sooner than he had expected it.

We went inside; and Sergeant Biggs, who had a light, pulled on a coat,
and sat down in state before a railed desk, on which a square book was
lying. Then he turned the brass cover off the ink, and squared his

“Now, sir, the particulars, if you please. We must make entry, afore
we does nothing. You were quite right in coming to head-quarters, Mr.
Orchardson. Let me see; May the fourteenth, isn’t it?”

“No, Biggs, no. It is morning now; and yesterday was the fifteenth of

“Quite right, sir. Here it is upon the _Standard_. May 16th, 1861, 3.30
a.m. by office clock. Information received from Cornelius Orchardson,
of the Fruit-Gardens, Sunbury. Everything ready, sir. Please to go

“Kit, you tell him. You know most about it. Scratch out ‘Cornelius;’
and put ‘Christopher,’ Biggs.”

Sergeant Biggs did not like to disfigure his book. However, he was a
most obliging man. “Stay, sir, stay,” he exclaimed: “I can do it better
and neater than that is. ‘Cornelius Orchardson, of the Fruit-Gardens,
Sunbury, and his nephew Christopher Orchardson.’ That meets the point
exactly. Now then, gentlemen, fire away. And I will reduce it into
proper form.”

Chafing at all this rigmarole, which was sending another good hour
to waste, I poured out my tale in a very few words, and had the
satisfaction of seeing at last an expression of amazement gathering and
deepening on the large fat countenance of Sergeant Biggs.

“Why this beats everything as was ever done in Sunbury, since Squire
Coldpepper’s daughter ran away! And in the same family, too, as you
might say! How long ago was that? Why, let me see.” He was going to
refer to some books, and took off his horn spectacles first to consider
where they were.

“Come along, Biggs. No time for that,” cried my uncle impatiently; “we
want you to come and examine the place at once. It was useless for us
to go up, till daylight. There are footsteps for you to examine, and
the doors.”

“Now this here will be all over London, afore the clock strikes twelve
to-day. Ah, you may stare, gentlemen; and we don’t tell how we do it.
But such is our organization, and things are brought to such perfection

“Come along, Biggs. Why, it’s pouring with rain! I knew the white
frosts were sure to bring it. But I did not expect it till the
afternoon. And it sounds like hail—shocking thing for all my blossom.”

“I’ll be with you, Mr. Orchardson, in about ten minutes. But I must
put my toggery to rights first, you see. Sergeant Biggs does not think
much of himself; but Sunbury does, and it would stare to see him go
on duty without any waistcoat or stock, or even a pair of braces on.
By-the-bye, gents, have you been to Tompkins’ house?”

This was about the first sensible thing he had said; and I answered
that we had not been there yet; but would go there at once, as it was
not far out of our course, and we would rejoin him at the cottage. I
had thought more than once in the long hours of that night of going to
see the girl Polly, but was loth to knock up a hard-working household
for nothing, and felt sure that Polly could throw no light upon the
matter: as she always left our cottage about five in the afternoon.

And so it proved when we saw her now. For she could only stare, and
exclaim, “Oh Lor’!” having most of her wits, which were not very
active, absorbed in hard work, and the necessity of living. And the
more I examined her, the more nervous she became, fancying that she
was undergoing trial, and perhaps likely to be hanged for the loss of
her young mistress.

“I never see nawbody take her away: nor nawbody come anigh the house,
all the time as I were in it. Mother knows I didn’t.” This she said
over and over again.

“Nobody says that you did, Polly,” I answered as gently as possible;
“but did you see anything to make you think, that your mistress meant
to go away, when you were gone?”

“I don’now what she was athinking of. She never told me nort about it.
No, I never see nawbody take her away. It isn’t fair, nor true, to say

“But, my good child, nobody supposes that you did. Nobody is blaming
you in the least. Nobody thinks that you saw her go away. But can’t
you tell us whether you saw anything to show that she was likely to go

“Yes, I saw a big black crow come flying right over the roof about one
o’clock; and then I knowed as some one was agoing, ’live or dead. But I
never told her, feared to frighten her. Lord in heaven knows I didn’t.”

“And did you see anything else go by? A cat, or a dog, or a man or a
woman, or anything else that did not usually come? Or did you hear any
steps, anywhere near the house, or see anything more than usual?”

Polly shook her head, as if I was putting a crushing weight of thought
on the top of it. And then she began to cry again, and her mother came
up to protect her. She had cried when she heard that her mistress was
gone; and she must not be allowed to cry again, or no one could tell
what would come of it.

“Sweetie, tell the whole truth now. Got no need to be frightened.
If perlice does come, they can’t do nothing at all to you, my dear.
Seventeen children have I had, and none ever put thumb on the Bible.”

Mrs. Tompkins did not mean that her family failed to search the
Scriptures, but that they had never been involved in criminal
proceedings; nay, not even as witnesses.

“Well then, I think as I did see summat,” replied Polly under this
encouragement. I would not have pressed her as I did, unless I had felt
pretty sure that she was keeping something back. “It worn’t nothin’ to
speak of much, nor yet to think upon, at the time.”

“Well, out with it, deary, whatever it was. All you have to do, is to
speak the truth, and leave them as can put two and two together, to
make out the meaning of it.”

Thus adjured, Polly, after one more glance to be sure that no policeman
was coming, told her tale. It was not very much, but it might mean

“’Twur about four o’clock, I believe, and all the things was put back
again after mucksing out the rooms, when missus said to me, ‘You run,
Polly, and pick a little bit of chive down the walk there. I don’t want
much,’ she says, ‘but what there is must be good, and just enough to
cover a penny-piece, after I’ve chopped it up and put it together. I
wants to have everything ready,’ she says, ‘just to make a homily when
my husband comes home. I have got plenty of parsley in that cup,’ she
says, ‘but he always likes a little bit of chive, to give it seasoning.
And be sure you pick it clean,’ she says, ‘and it musn’t be yellow at
the tip, or dirty, because if the grit gets in,’ she says, ‘it’s ever
so much worse than having none at all.’ So I says, ‘All right, ma’am, I
knows where it is; and you shall have the best bit out of all the row.’
‘You’re a good girl,’ she says, ‘don’t be longer than you can help,
and you shall have a cup of tea, Polly, before you go home, because
you’ve worked very well to-day; nobody could ’a doed it better,’ says
she. Well, I took a little punnet as was hanging in the kitchen, not
to make it hot in my hands, you see, and I went along the grass by the
gooseberry bushes,—you knows the place I mean, mother; and there was
the chives, all as green as little leeks. As I was a-stooping over
them, with my back up to the sky, all of a sudden I heer’d a sort of
creak like, as made me stand up and look to know where it come from.
And then I seed the old door, as used to be bolted always, opening just
a little way, in towards me, though I was a good bit off; and then the
brim of a hat come through, and I sings out, ‘Who’s there, please?’
There wasn’t no nose or eyes a-coming through the door yet; nor yet any
legs, so far as I could see; but only that there brim, like the brim
of a soft hat; and I couldn’t say for certain whether it were brown
or black. ‘Nothing here to steal,’ I says, for I thought it wor some
tramp; and then the door shut softly, and I was half a mind to go and
see, whether there was any one out in the lane. But it all began to
look so lonely like, and I was ordered not to stop, and so I thought
the best thing was to go back, and tell the missus. But something came
that drove it out of my mind altogether. For when I got back to the
house she says, ‘Don’t you lose a minute, Polly, that’s a good girl.
Run as far as Widow Cutthumb’s, and fetch half a dozen eggs. I thought
I had four, and I have only got three,’ she says, ‘and I can’t make a
homily for two people of three eggs. And my husband won’t eat a bit,
unless I has some,’ she says.

“So I was off quick stick to Widow Cutthumb’s; and there, outside the
door, I seen that Bat Osborne, the most owdacious boy in all Sunbury.
‘Halloa!’ says he, ‘Poll, you do look stunnin’. Got a baker’s roll
a-risin’, by the way you be a-pantin’! Give us a lock of your hair,
again’ the time when we gets old,’ he says. And afore I could give him
a box on his ear, out he spreads his fingers, some way he must have
learned—for I never could ’a doed it myself, no, that I couldn’t—and
away goes all my black-hair down over all my shoulders, just the same
as if it was Sunday going on for three years back. That vexed I were,
I can assure you, Mr. Kit—well, mother knows best how I put it up that
very same morning for the cleaning, and our Annie to hold the black
pins for me—but get at him I couldn’t, to give him one for himself. He
were half across the street, afore I could see out; and he hollered out
some imperence as made all the others grinny. But I’ll have my change,
afore next Sunday week, I will.

“When I got back, Mr. Kit, you may suppose, all about the door and the
hat-brim was gone clean out of my mind, as if it never was there; and
I come away home, without a word about it, and never thought of it
nother, till I lay awake in bed and heered our own door creak, when
father went to spy the weather. But oh, if I had only thought about it,
Mr. Kit, perhaps missus mightn’t never ’a been took off!”



AT this beginning of my great trouble, I used to be worried, more than
common sense would warrant, by the easy way in which other people took
my distress, even while I was among them. If anything occurred to make
them laugh, they laughed with all their hearts at things, in which I
could perceive no joke at all. I dare say they were right, and I was
wrong; but I felt that I should not have laughed at all, if the tables
had been turned upon them, as I wished they had been. That is to say,
if they had been in bitter grief, and I had been standing outside to
help them. For the policemen I could make all allowance, because they
must get seasoned by their profession, even as the lawyers do; but it
did seem a little bit unnatural at first, that some men, to whom I
would gladly have lent my last shilling but one, if they had wanted
it, should be ready to put their hands into their pockets, not to feel
if there was anything there for my good, but to enable them to enjoy a
broad grin at leisure, if the least bit of laughable nature turned up.
But one thing I will say for the women, there was scarcely so much as a
smile among them; they could understand what I had lost, and they knew
(perhaps from self-examination) that a good wife is not to be got every

The heavy cloud had been pouring down rain in volumes and hail in
lines, when with Selsey Bill, and Mrs. Bill, and Polly lagging after
us under a broken umbrella, my uncle and myself came to Honeysuckle
Cottage and found Sergeant Biggs and Constable Turnover, with their
oilskin capes running like a tiled roof, and their faces full of

“Wouldn’t go inside, gents, till you came; no warrant being out, and no
instructions received. Always gets into trouble, when we acts on our
own hook.”

We led them inside, for there was broad day-light now, and the cloud
began to lift, and the rain came down in single drops, instead of one
great sheet. As they stamped about and shook themselves in our little
passage, scattering grimy wetness like a trundled mop, I wondered, with
a bitter pang, what Kitty would have thought after all her neat work,
if she could only have seen this.

“Turnover, you come after me. We makes this inspection together, mind.
And what I sees, you sees, and corroborates. Though it ain’t a case of
murder, so far as we know yet, we must keep our eyes open, the same as
if it was. Everything comes to us, and nothing comes amiss to them that
does their duty.”

This sentiment was much admired by Constable Turnover; and my uncle
whispered, “Let them do exactly as they like, Kit. They are a pair of
fools; but we need not tell them so. We shall have them on our side,
at any rate. And if they don’t do any good, they can do no harm. Leave
them entirely to their own devices.”

This quite agreed with my own view of the matter. When a crime has
been committed, we call in the police, as in dangerous illness we
invoke a doctor, for the satisfaction of our own minds, rather than
from any hope of being helped. And in the former case, we have this
advantage—the thing becomes widely spread, and distant eyes are turned
on it.

“All in order, gents; not a lock been forced, not a door broke open, so
far as we can discover.” Sergeant Biggs was beating his hands together,
from the force of habit, as he came to us in the kitchen, where we were
sitting drowsily. “Two windows open, and some rain come in; but no
signs of entrance by them. The young lady have gone of her own accord,
and left no sign for any one. Time of disappearance not exactly known,
you say, but somewhere between five and ten o’clock supposed. Please
give particulars of dress, height, and complexion. We know the young
lady well enough, of course, but we like to have those things from
relatives. And the dress is beyond us; ladies always are so changing.
Mr. Kit says her gray cloak is gone, and brown bonnet. White chip hat
hanging on the peg. Looks as if she meant to go a goodish way. But not
much preparation for travelling. There was a little black bag, sir, you
said you could not find. Very sorry to trouble you, sir, when you are
so down-hearted. But I must ask you just to look into them drawers in
the lady’s bedroom. And specially to see if any cash is missing. Excuse
me, sir, I meant no rudeness.”

For I had leaped up, and was ready to strike him, at the suggestion
that my darling could have robbed me.

“He is doing his duty, Kit; don’t be a fool;” cried my uncle, as Biggs
threw his arm up in defence.

“Must give up this case, sir,” said the sergeant, without anger;
“unless you allows us to conduct it our own way. We are bound to know
all that can throw a light upon it. And nine times out of ten, when a
woman—beg pardon—a lady runs away from her husband on the sudden, she
collars all the cash, and all the trinkets she can find. Don’t mean to
insinuate for a moment that this young lady done anything of the kind.
But for all that, I am bound to put the question; and Mr. Cornelius can
see it, if you can’t, sir.”

“Very well; I will go and see,” I answered, having sense enough to know
that he was right; “and you can both come and see for yourselves, if
you like. Perhaps you won’t believe it, unless you do. At any rate, you
come, Uncle Corny.”

I ran up in haste to our little bedroom, as pretty a room as one could
wish to see, for its cheerfulness, airiness, and fair view, between the
clustering climbers, of the broad winding river and the hills beyond,
all to be seen either over or amid a great waving depth of white and
pink, where the snow of the pears put the apples to the blush. Very
plainly furnished as it was, our little room looked sweet, even in its
desolation, and as lively and delightful as the bride who had adorned
it. My Aunt Parslow had given us a pretty chest of drawers, of real
bird’s-eye maple-wood, which she had bought at a sale somewhere; and
we kept all our money, that was not at the bank, in one of the top
drawers, which had a tolerable lock. This was the proper place for
Kitty’s purse and mine; although I never had one, so to speak—at least
it was always empty. Whenever I had any money, fit to spend, it was
generally always in my waistcoat-pocket; and it never stopped there
long, if I came across anybody who deserved it. But I never went out
with too much at a time; for it is not safe to have nothing left at
home. The key was not in the drawer, of course; but I knew where Kitty
kept it, and there it was, as usual.

I could have wept now, if I might have made sure of nobody coming
after me, when I found all the balance of this week’s allowance for
housekeeping uses in a twist of silver paper—such as used to be common,
but is seldom seen now; and my darling had not made much boot upon the
store, ever since last Saturday. For our butcher, who wanted her to
run up an account (being in love with her, as everybody was, although
he had a wife and seven little butchers rising), had made believe that
he could not stop to weigh the last half-leg of mutton he sent up.
Kitty had told me of this, and lamented, while unwilling to appear
distrustful of him. For an honest tradesman dislikes that, though he
often has to brace up his mind to it.

I put this residue of our fifteen shillings into one corner, as a
sacred thing; and then I went to the brown metal box at the back of the
drawer, where we kept our main stock, with a dozen of my wife’s new
handkerchiefs piled over it, to delude all burglars. I had bought her a
dozen, at less than cost price, as the haberdasher vowed, at Baycliff;
and we had been reluctant to be so hard upon him; but he said that he
was selling off, and we must have the benefit. And I lifted them now
with a miserable pang; for my love had kissed me, for this cheap but
pretty present, and she had marked them all with her own sweet hair.

I have often been astonished in my life, as everybody must be, almost
before his hair begins to grow; but mine (which was now in abundant
short curls) would have pushed off my hat, if I had worn one, when the
money-box came to my eyes, half open, and as clean as a spade on a
Saturday night. Every bank-note was gone, and every sovereign, too, and
even the four half-sovereigns, which we had meant to spend first, when
we could not help it!

I have never loved money with much of my heart, though we are bound to
do as our neighbours do; and perhaps it had been a little pleasure to
me, to have more than I ever could have dreamed of having, through the
great generosity of Aunt Parslow, and the timely assistance of Captain
Fairthorn. But now my whole heart went down in a lump, and I scarcely
had any power of breath, as I fell once more upon my widowed bed, and
had no strength to wrestle with the woe that lay upon me. That my own
wife, my own true wife, the heart of my heart, and the life of my
life, should have run away from me, of her own accord, without a word,
without one good-bye, and carried off all our money!

“Come, Kit, how much longer do you mean to be?” my uncle’s voice came
up the stairs. “Let him alone, Biggs. Perhaps he is crying. Those young
fellows never understand the world. Some little thing comes round
a corner on them, and they give way, for want of seasoning. He was
wonderfully bound up in his Kitty. And however it may look against her
now, I will stake my life that she deserved it. You Peelers see all the
worst of the world, and it makes you look black at everything. I would
lay every penny I possess, which is very little in these free-trade
times, that he finds every farthing of his money right. Though I have
often told him what a fool he was to keep so much in his own house.”

“He seems an uncommon time a-counting of it.” Sergeant Biggs spoke
sceptically, and retired to the kitchen; for it did not matter very
much to him.

Getting no reply from me, my uncle came up slowly; for a night out of
bed tells upon the stiff joints, when a man is getting on in years.
Then he marched up bravely, and laid one hand upon my shoulder.

“What are you about, Kit? Breaking down, old fellow! You must not do
that, with these chaps in the house, or the Lord knows what a lot of
lies will get about. Money all right, of course. No doubt of that, my

I could make no answer, but pointed to the drawer, which was still
pulled out to its full extent. With a little smile, which expressed as
well as words—“What a fool you must be, to keep your money there!” he
looked in, and saw the empty cash-box, and turned as white as his own
pear-blossom. Then he took the brown box in his thick right hand, and
turned it upside down, as if he could not trust his eyes.

“How much was there in it? But perhaps you did not know? Oh, Kit, Kit,
is it come to this at last?”

He spoke as if I ought to have been robbed by my own wife, a long time
ago, and was bound by the duty of a husband to expect it. But my spirit
rose, and I jumped up, and faced him.

“Every farthing of it was her own,” I said; “and she had a perfect
right to take it. It is part of the hundred pounds Aunt Parslow gave
her, on our—on her wedding-day. There was forty-five pounds in that
box; and the other fifty-five was invested according to your advice.
I would send her that also, if I knew her address. It was all her own
money; you may ask Aunt Parslow. I have no right to a farthing of it.”

“Kit, you are a very fine fellow after all, though you do take things
so lumpily. But answer me one little question. Why did your aunt give
her that hundred pounds?”

“Because she loved her, as everybody does—or did. Because she was so
kind, and good, and loving.”

“No, my boy, not at all for that reason. But because she married you,
Aunt Parslow’s nephew. The money was yours, in all honesty, not hers.
Or at any rate it belonged to you together. She had no more right to
take that money without your consent, than I have to walk into Baker
Rasp’s shop, and walk out of it with the contents of his till. You
must look at things squarely, and make your mind up. Expel her from
your heart. She is a light-of-love, and a robber. Oh, Kit, Kit, that I
should have brought you into this! And I did think that I knew so much
about women.”

My uncle shed a tear, not on his own account, or mine, and perhaps not
even for the sake of women; but because he had loved Kitty as his own
daughter, and he could no more expel her from his heart, than I from
mine; at least without taking a long time about it. I was moved with
his grief, for he was hard to grieve; and my wrath at his injustice was
disarmed. I put back the empty box, and locked the drawer; for I knew
that it was useless to argue with him.

“This is the second great grief of my life,” he said in a low voice, as
if talking to himself; “over and above those losses which are inflicted
on us by the Lord, as time goes on. And the other was through a woman
too. I will tell you of it, when we have more time; for it may help you
in your own grief, Kit. But now we must quiet those fellows downstairs.
I wish we had never called them in. I would rather lose every penny I
possess, and start in the world again, as a market-porter, than let
this miserable story get abroad. We must take your view of the case
before the public, and tell them that there is no money gone, except
her own. The Lord knows that I am not a liar, and He will forgive
me for stretching a bit this time. Or perhaps you had better do it;
because you believe it, you know, and so there won’t be any lie at all.
You go down first; and I will come behind you grumbling, which no one
can say is an ungrateful thing now.”

This seemed the proper course, although in my misery I should never
have thought of it, until I wished that I had done so. The question as
to the right to that money lay between myself and Kitty; and as she
had doubtless considered it hers, to brand her at large as a robber,
without allowing her chance of explanation, would be most unfair, and
would only add another pain to a story too painful already. So I went
down and told Sergeant Biggs that my wife had taken a few clothes in
her handbag, and a part of some money she had lately received as a
wedding-present, but had left the balance of her cash for housekeeping,
as well as most of her trinkets, in the bedroom drawer.

He was much disappointed at this, and shook his head, to disguise the
blow received by his sagacity.

“Beats me for the present, at any rate,” he said; “but time will
throw more light upon it, before we are many years older. You hold
on, sir, and not go about too much. Half the mischief comes of that.
A party comes to us, and he says—‘Look here, I leave the whole of it
to your care, sergeant. You understand these things, and I don’t.
Anything as you do I will back up—magistrates, witnesses, lawyers,
dogstealers—whatever you find needful, up to a five-pound note, or
more.’ And after that, what do we feel? Why, ready to go through with
it, on our best mettle, you might say, and come down with cash out
of our own breeches’ pocket, for love of nothing else but duty. And
then we gets crossed, like two dogs a-coursing, by the other party’s
track, with his nose up in the air the very same as if he never come
anigh us. So I says to Turnover, ‘Now one thing or the other; either
they must let us do it all, or nothing. And if we do it all, in a
hunt-the-slipper thing like this, we must know all the ins and outs,
first from the beginning. Then,’ says I, ‘we can give our minds to it,
Turnover.’ And he answers—‘Yes, sergeant, but do they mean to tell us
everything?’ And now that’s the question before you, sir.”

“We will think about that, and let you know by-and-by,” said my uncle,
who had listened to this long oration; “not that you ever find out
anything, Biggs. Still it is a comfort to believe that you are trying.
And now come and do what you ought to have done long ago—make a careful
examination of the footprints by the door. It has been raining pretty
sharp; but it all came from the south, and the important marks are on
the north side in the lane, according to what my nephew saw last night,
and the shower won’t have touched them, with the door shut to. Bring
some paper and a pencil, and your old joint-rule, Kit. Not that we
shall ever make out much.”

He was right enough in that last prediction. For although I had
fastened the door—in strict keeping with the moral of the proverb—and
no rain had pelted the ground outside it, yet a greater effacer than
rain had been there. For the spot being on a sharp slope, and below the
crown of the road, or the lane I should say, a strong rush of water had
taken track there, and washed away all the dust, and then the heavier
substance, leaving rough pebbles with sharp edges sticking up, as clean
and unconscious as before they saw the world.

“Nothing to be made of that,” said Biggs; “nor of any footmarks
anywhere else, after all the rain as have fallen. Only one thing to do
now is to inquire of the neighbours, and folk as were about last night.”



FOR as much as three weeks I had been full of pride, in taking my Kitty
about everywhere—even by the seaside, where I knew very little, but
luckily she knew less, in spite of her scientific origin—and asking
her to look about and see things with her own eyes; and if she could
not make them out, to call me in to help her. This had been rash on my
part; for a man may be gaping about, for his lifetime, and die after
all with his mouth wide open; and not a word come from it, to help
the people left behind, but only to unsettle them, and put them in a
flutter; as gnats skip into another dance, at every new breath across
them. But Kitty had really put some questions far outside my knowledge
(as a child may, who hangs on his grandfather’s thumb), and I had
promised to look up those points and deliver an opinion, when I had
one. All this came into my mind, like a chill, when I had to trace her
dear steps, away from me, away from me.

Let seventy times seven wise men say that no man with a grain of wisdom
could have a spark of faith in women, because they never know their own
mind—little as there is of it to know—I still abode in my own faith,
and let them quote old saws against the sturdy holdfast of true love.
I felt as sure of my Kitty’s heart, as I did of my own, and more so;
for she never would have borne to hear a hundredth part of the things
against me, which I had to listen to against her. And the cowards, who
vent their own craven souls in slander of those who cannot face them,
had a fine time of it now, and rejoiced in the misery they were too
small to feel. Such things might sour a weakling, who depends upon what
other people think; but I found enough of manhood coming up in me, as
time went on, to make me stick to my own trust, and let outer opinions
touch my home, no more than the shower that runs down the glass.

At first, however, it was dreadful work. Everybody seemed to be against
me, not with any unkindness, but by way of worldly wisdom. “Don’t you
dwell too much upon it.” “A runaway wife isn’t worth running after.”
“Never you mind; but get another; try the people you know, with their
friends in the place.” These were the counsels I received, with a nod
of my head, and no reply.

But I could not see things as others saw them. I spent the first day
of my lonely life, in wandering through the crooked lanes, and working
out every track and turn which my darling could have taken, in the dark
mystery of her flight from me. Very often I thought that she must come
back; and there was scarcely a hill that I did not run up, persuading
myself that when the top was gained, there I should descry her in the
distance beyond, weary, and dragging her feet along, but eager at
sight of me to make a rush and fall into my longing arms. How many a
corner I turned, believing that it must be the last between her and
me; and how many a footpath stile I sat on, hiding my eyes that she
might catch me unawares, as at blind-man’s buff, and throw her warm
arms round my neck, and kiss me into shame of my mistrust, and tell me
that she never could have doubted me, whatever I had done, or whatever
people said!

And then, when it grew too dark to see even my own love in the shadow
of the lanes, and the last note of the wedded thrush (who sings to the
sparkle of the stars in May) was hushed by a call from his nest, and
followed by the first clear trill of the nightingale—

    “Who tells the deeper tale of night
     With passion too intense for light,”

—weary, and with little heart for loneliness and doubt and woe, yet I
could not be quite sure that when I opened our own door some one might
not run out hotly, and give me no time to speak, but hold me lip to
lip, and breast to breast, with scarcely room for a tear between us.

It is the emptiness that follows such full hope that does the harm to
the powers of endurance. When no one came to meet me, and the cold
rooms showed grey lines of shade, with no dear life to cross them, I
used to fall away, and feel my heart go down, like the water of a sink,
when the plug is taken out of it. There was nothing more for it to do.
My wretched life was not worth the fuss of pumping and of labouring;
better to give in at once, and have no more pain to drain it.

“You are killing yourself up here, my boy; this will never do,” said
Uncle Corny. “Bother the women; what a pest they are! Try to be like
that ancient fellow—I can never remember his name, but they call him
the father of history. You told me about him, when you went to the
Grammar-school at Hampton. And it was so wise that I paid for another
half-year for you to read him. You know better than I do; but I think
there had been a lot of carrying off of pretty girls between two
countries, and they were going to fight about them. But he says that
they had no call to do it; for men of discretion would let them go, and
make no fuss about them. Because it was manifest that the women would
never have been carried off, unless they themselves had wished it. I
don’t suppose you could do it now; but if you can, bring down the book,
and read it to me this evening. It would do you a deal more good than
to hold your tongue, and eat your heart out.”

“I hate to hear of that rubbish,” I replied; “they were a lot of
good-for-nothings. To talk of my Kitty in that sort of way would drive
me mad, Uncle Corny. If you have nothing better to say than that, you
had better go home to Tabby.”

“Well, perhaps they will come and carry Tabby off. I believe she would
go for a new bonnet; and I don’t know what I should do if she did. But
shut up this place, Kit, and come back to the old quarters. You want
company, my boy; and I’d rather let old Harker in again than have you
here killing yourself like that, and sleeping in the kitchen on two
chairs; if you ever get any sleep at all.”

“I will never leave this house,” I said; “and I won’t even be smoked
out of it. When Kitty comes back, she will come here first; and there
is no telling how soon she may want me. You only bother me with all
this stuff.”

“Well, I will not be hard upon you, Kit; because the Lord has done that
quite enough. But you have not got a bit of religion in you, after all
the teaching I have given you.”

This was very fine from Uncle Corny, who never even went to church,
except to keep other people out of his pew. And he rubbed his nose as
he said it; as he always did, when he had gone too far.

“There is a very good man wants to see you,” he went on a little
nervously, for I knew that he had been leading up to something; “and a
man to whom you are bound to listen, because he was the one who married
you, and therefore understands all the subject, matrimony, women, and
the doctrines of the Church. The Reverend Peter Golightly wishes to
have a little talk with you.”

“And I wish to have none with him. He is a very good and kind-hearted
man. But I could not bear to hear his voice, after—after what he did
for me, and Kitty.”

“I was afraid there would be that objection,” my uncle answered kindly;
“but you will get over that by-and-by, my boy. And it would be rude not
to see him, for he takes the greatest interest in your case. He has
been disappointed himself, I believe; though of course he did not tell
me so. He is too much a man for that sort of thing. I shall go and hear
him preach some day, unless our vicar comes back again. They tell me
that he does a lot of good, and he preached against robbing orchards
once, although he has only got one apple tree, and it is eaten up with
American blight. There’s another fellow wants to see you too—not much
of the parson about him. He can tell you things you ought to know; and
being about as he always is, I wonder you have not been to see him. Not
that I care for Sam Henderson; but he is not so bad as he used to be.
He is going to be married next month; and I’ll be bound he won’t let
his wife—”

“Run away from him—you were going to say. Perhaps he will not be able
to help himself. Well, I will see him, if he likes to come. I shall be
back by nine o’clock. It is very kind of him to wish it. But send up a
bottle of whisky, uncle. I have no drink of any sort in the house; and
Sam is nothing without his glass, although he never takes very much. I
must give him something, if he comes.”

“And take a drop yourself, my boy, if only for a little change. I don’t
hold with cold water, when a fellow is so down; though it is better
than the opposite extreme. I suppose, by-the-bye, that your Kitty has
not taken—”

“Uncle Corny!” I cried, in a voice that made him jump; “what next will
you imagine? She never touched anything, not even beer; though I often
tried to make her take a glass. She had seen too much of that, where
she was.”

“All right, Kit. But you are getting very cross; which is not the
proper lesson of affliction, as the Reverend Peter might express it.
Well, I’ll send little Bill up, with the bottle and a corkscrew. I
don’t suppose you know where to find anything now. That’s the worst of
married life even for three weeks. But I have got a plan I mean to tell
you of to-morrow.”

When I came back, a little after dark, having finished that hopeless
wandering which I went through every evening now, there was Sam
Henderson, sitting on an empty flower-pot outside my door, with a cigar
in his mouth. He might have gone inside, for I left the front door open
all day long and all night too, unless the weather prevented it, for I
had nothing to be robbed of now; at least nothing that I cared about,
except Kitty’s clothes, which I had locked out of sight. And it seemed
to be delicate and kind of Sam, to sit here in discomfort, instead of
walking in. And he showed another piece of good taste and good will,
which could hardly be expected from so blunt and rough a man—he said
not a word about his own bright prospects, until I inquired about them.

But he shook my hand in a very friendly way, and left me to begin upon
the matter which had brought me to my present state. And for some time
I also avoided that.

“I will tell you, old chap,” he said at last, in reply to my anxious
question, “exactly what I think, though it is not good for much, being
altogether out of my own line. I think you have been awfully wronged,
as abominably wronged as any fellow ever was, on the face of this
earth—which is saying a good bit, mind you. Knowing what a lot of
infernal rogues there are to be found at every corner, and much more
often than decent fellows, I am never brought up standing by any black
job; though the ins and outs of it may floor me. The Professor is a
soft man, isn’t he? He has shown it in many ways, although he is so
clever. You would call him a soft man, wouldn’t you?”

“Well,” I said, wondering how this could bear upon it, “I suppose he is
rather of the credulous order, as most good men are, who measure others
by themselves. But he had left England long before. So that can have
little to do with it.”

“Right you are, as concerns himself. But I am a believer in breed,
my friend. And the longer I live, the more true I find it come. A
credulous father, if you prefer the word, is likely to be blest with a
credulous child, and your wife took after her father more closely in
the inner, because she didn’t in the outer woman. At least, I can’t say
from my own eyes, knowing nothing of old Blowpipes, but I understand
she did not favour him in the flesh.”

“Not exactly,” I answered, with a little smile, as I thought of the
loveliness of Kitty’s face; “but she was like him a little just here
and there.”

“A little won’t do. My old _Trunnion_, who croaked in the great frost
that almost settled you, my boy, has a son of his old age, _Commodore_,
who will be heard of towards July at the market, scarcely a bit like
him in the face, except in one tuck of his nostril, and a tuft of five
hairs over his near eye. But do you think I could not swear to him
by his ways and tricks, and his style of coming up? That’s the time
to know what a horse thinks of you; and I tell you this colt thinks
exactly as his father did; and all the more because he isn’t like him
in the face. There must be the likeness somewhere.”

“Yes, I have heard you say that many times before, and I daresay you
are right enough about it. But what has that to do with—what has
happened to me?”

“Just everything, stupid. Your wife being soft—or credulous, if
you like it better—she sucks in a lot of lies against you. The dose
comes from somebody she believes in, not her old enemies, of course.
Her dignity will not allow her to complain—women are always horribly
dignified when jealous—and off she goes, without a word, leaving you
to your own conscience which will more than give you the tip for it.
She’ll come back by-and-by, when she has punished you enough; and then
of course you’ll have to swear, etc., etc. She’ll call herself all
sorts of names. And there’ll be nobody like you, till next time. You’ll
see if that isn’t at the bottom of all this.”

“Not likely,” I answered with some wrath. “In the first place, my Kitty
would never believe a word of such stuff against me, and there is no
such thing as jealousy in her nature.”

“You know best. But I thought I heard something from the man round the
corner at Ludred.”

“That was a different thing altogether,” I said quickly, although the
remembrance struck me, as it had not done before; “and in the next
place, if she could be so absurd, she would be the last person in the
world to go away without a word, without even giving me a chance of
taking my own part. No, that theory will never do. My Kitty was the
most just, as well as the kindest darling ever born.”

“You don’t know what they are sometimes. How can you expect to know
more about them than they do about themselves? Yesterday, just by way
of something, I asked Sally what she would do, if she ever turned up
jealous. ‘I would grind my ring-finger off,’ she said, ‘with these
two teeth, I would, Sam’—for she has got uncommon grinders—‘and I
would make my rival swallow it.’ Now, Sally has been well broken in,
remember, and no vice in the family; at any rate since her great
grand-dam; but her eyes showed that she would do it!”

“There is no ferocity in Kitty,” I answered with a lofty air; “I know
nothing about race-horses, and very little about women. But women are
only men in a better form, more gentle, more just, and more loving.
They never give way to such fury as we do—”

“The Professor’s wife, for instance, Kit. She never gives way to her
temper, does she? Oh dear, no. Even if she has any temper to give way
to. A sucking dove—too mild to suck, if her sister wants the pigeon’s
milk before her.”

“She is the exception that proves the rule. And I doubt whether even
she would be so, if she did not suck too much of stronger liquor.
And I will tell you another thing, Master Sam, as you have put me up
to this; and you have a right to know everything now, that you may
understand the case. It knocks your theory on the head. Only I must
have your solemn promise that no one shall ever hear of it.”

Sam gave me his pledge; and I knew that he would keep it, for he was
well inured to control his tongue. Then I told him, although it went
much against the grain, of the disappearance of our stock of money.

“That beats me; at least for the present,” he replied; “it don’t seem
to square with anything. Throws me out of my stride, and makes me
cross my legs. But I don’t believe she ever took it. How can you tell
that she took it, poor chap? If she collared that tin, she will never
come back. Was there nobody else could have taken it? The Peelers, for
instance, you know what they are? They had the run of the house. I
have known a lot of cases—”

“No, it is impossible that they can have touched it. The lock had not
been tampered with. The key was in its place, and the last place they
would have searched for it. And I know by the state of the drawer, that
no hand but my wife’s had been inside it.”

“Then you had better not call her your wife any more.” Sam Henderson
spoke very sternly; and then, looking at my face, went on more kindly,
and with a huskiness in his voice, “You have been unlucky, old chap, as
unlucky as any fellow I ever came across, except an old man at New York
races once. It was not about money his bad luck was; or I would not
compare it with yours, my dear boy. Sorry as I was for your trouble,
Kit, I thought it could all be cured, till now. And it can be cured
even now, dear Kit; but only as we cure the grief of death. I need not
tell you to be a man; for I see that you have been one all along. After
what you have told me, I understand your behaviour thoroughly. Before
that, I was angry with you, and a little ashamed of you, to tell the
truth, for moping here in this way. I thought, ‘Why the deuce doesn’t
he go up and shake the truth out of that old rogue Hotchpot, or that
bigger villain, Downy Bulwrag?’ But now I see that you could only stay
at home, and trust to time to comfort you. And you must weed out, as I
would a filly with three legs, a bad lot, a woman who—”

“Stop, Sam,” I cried, “don’t say a word that would make me hate you.
Though all appearances are so black, I will never for a moment lose
my faith in Kitty. Nobody knows her, as I do. If I never see, or hear
of her again, I will say to my last breath, and feel to my last pulse,
that she has been deceived, not by me, but about me; and that I have
never been deceived in her.”

“Well, old chap, all that I can say is, that you deserve a better wife
than was ever yet born. And if your opinion of your wife is true, why,
this affair beats any job on the turf, that I ever heard of; and I have
heard of a smart few. But I shall keep my eyes open, Kit, and we’ll try
to pull it off. I pick up a lot of things you would never think of; and
there’s daylight at the bottom of the best tarred sack. Come and see
me to-morrow. It will be a little change. And I can show you a young
’un that will take the shine out of all Chalker’s. If you want a pot of
money, I can tell you where to get it.”



I DID not want any pot of money. And even if I had been filled with
that general desire, Henderson’s suggestion would have had no charm
for me. But I resolved to do a much wiser thing—to stick to my work,
with head and hands, and let the heart come after them, if it could,
as it grew wiser. The police had made nothing of my case, although
they had done their best, no doubt. Whoever had compassed my wife’s
departure—for I would not call it “flight”—had managed it with much
craft; and luck (according to the ancient proverb) had shown a
kinsman’s love for craft. The lane, at the back of our lonely cottage,
was little frequented, except on Sundays, and then in the evening
only, for that study of mutual tastes and feelings, which is known as
“keeping company.” For this it was a popular resort, and therefore (as
usual) called “Love Lane,” by blushing youth and maiden. At other times
its chief use was to give access to some meadow-land, and its chief
wayfarers were four cows, a donkey, and a nanny-goat, belonging to
Farmer Osborne. But it wound into divers other lanes, towards Hampton,
Tangley Park, and Bedfont, and through some of them to Feltham Station,
on the London and South-Western line. That was one of the places where
I had made first inquiry; but Sergeant Biggs had been before me, and so
he had at Twickenham. And in fact he had sought far and near, and been
put upon false scent sometimes, but had hit on nothing genuine.

Whatever any man may say, or even think, or dream of, the opinions of
his fellow-men go into his mind, and work there. No one is certain what
he believes; or at any rate how he believes it. And the harder he toils
to establish his faith, the more apt he is to undermine it. His best
plan is never to argue about whatever he longs to trust in; or if his
good friends will not let him alone, he should choose for his disputant
the sceptic. This will build him up a good deal; not because he has
convinced the other man, but because he knows that he must have done
so, if the other had been gifted with reason.

And now I was more convinced than ever, by the firm convictions of
my uncle, and Sam, that they both were quite wrong, and that I was
quite right. If they had only said that there might be some mistake,
something that admitted of a simple explanation, and with patience on
our part must receive it, in that case the chances are that I should
have been doubtful whether they had any grounds for putting it in that
way. But when they came and put it—without asking my opinion—in the
very opposite way to that, and the opposite one to what I wanted to
believe, their conclusion was a spring-board to send me heels over head
to the counter one.

My good Aunt Parslow had been over twice, and held very long talks with
Uncle Corny; but I had simply refused to take part in them. To go into
all the pros and cons, and hear one say this, and the other say that;
all assuming in the calmest manner that they knew at least ten times as
much about my poor self, and my richer self, as both of us put together
knew, in our most conscientious moments—grateful as I was, I offered
them that view of gratitude, which alone can make a slow shot at her
fleeting speed—the instantaneous process. In the twenty-four millionth
part of a moment, all her legs have spurned the wind, and the fool who
thought to chronicle her, finds her dust upon his glass.

Herein I was not just, or fair; and I have lived to be ashamed of it.
But up to this present time of search, I have not come across the man,
who continued to be just and fair, while a wrong that went to the
bottom of his soul was fresh, and hot, and turbid. Such men there may
be, of vast philosophy, or profound religion; but I have never met
them yet; and if I do, I shall be afraid of them.

Thus I waited, day by day, slowly quitting hold of hope, hardening
myself to do without her, by incessant work of hand. In this I took no
pride or pleasure, as a mill finds none in perpetual grind; but from
morning twilight till evening dusk, I laboured among the lonely trees.
My uncle begged me to go to London, if only for a little change and
stir, as the strawberry season came, and he began to use his stand
again. But I felt myself unfit for this, and knew that in my present
vein, I should only do a mischief to him, among his ancient customers.
For a happy face and a cheerful spirit do best among the buyers; and
a bit of chaff, or a turn of slang, will sometimes help a lame market
through. I knew a man once, a mere carter he was, who had never been
near “Common Garden” before, but was sent up by a neighbouring grower,
as a last resource, when his salesman fell ill. A mere bumpkin he was,
and he wore a smock-frock, and cord trousers tied below the knee; but
his round, merry face, and broad country brogue, and native simplicity
and twinkling eyes, took the humour of the crowd; and he sold out all
his lot at top prices, by looking as fresh as his fruit, before anybody
else had got rid of a dozen.

“Well, if you won’t go up, you won’t,” my uncle said to me one day;
“but you will break down, going on like this. I like a young fellow to
work; but I can’t abide for him to do nothing else, and never think
twice of his victuals. And you are spoiling your own chance altogether,
in another and a very important affair. Your Aunt Parslow took a great
fancy to you, and she meant to come down handsome when she dies. She
told me that, almost in so many words. And now you are setting her
quite against you. You know how you behaved, the last time she came

“I could not endure her perpetual talk. You can’t say that I was rude
to her. But I don’t want her money. What good is it to me? I wish she
had never given us a farthing.”

“It is nasty rubbish to talk like that, Kit; and every one will turn
against you. You used to have such a lot of common sense. Well, perhaps
you were not exactly rude to her; or at least you did not mean to be.
But there is nothing ruder, as women look at it, than to let them have
all the talk to themselves; although they insist upon it, if you don’t.
You must not interrupt them, of course; but still you must say enough
to show that you are listening, and that you think highly of what
they are saying; though of course you knew it all, before they began.
Instead of that, what did you do? You crossed your legs; women never
like that, when they are talking to you, any more than a lap-dog who
wants to jump up. I don’t know why it is; but they never can bear it.
And you did worse than that. The clock struck five, and you began to
count it. You young fellows never behave well to ladies.”

“I am sure I did not mean to offend her, uncle. I never thought twice
of what I was doing.”

“Exactly. And you should have thought of nothing else, while you seemed
to think only of what she was saying. But I want you to do me a favour,
Kit. I suppose you don’t wish to offend me too?”

“Certainly not. Because you are reasonable, and have always been so
good to me. I will do anything to oblige you, Uncle Corny.”

“And by doing it, you will oblige yourself. You are wearing your
fingers to the bone, and all the flesh off your other bones, by this
confounded stubbornness. I hate to hear the tap of your hammer almost,
much as I used to like it. Now, just take old Spanker to-morrow
afternoon, and drive over to your aunt’s at Leatherhead, with a basket
of strawberries I promised her. She doesn’t know what a good strawberry
is; eleven people out of a dozen don’t; any more than a babe that just
opens his mouth. She has plenty of her own, I know; but none worth
the trouble of eating. To-morrow will be Saturday. You can stop till
Monday; and it will do you a lot of good, and set you up again almost.
There is nothing like a woman in a case like yours. You let her talk
on, and you never contradict her, and she says to herself—‘Well, I have
done him good!’ And so she has; not the way she meant it; but by making
you think that they are all alike, and not a bit of solid sense among
them. And it is not only that, but you are pleased to think how much
better you know things than they do; though you don’t say one word to
their fifty. Whenever I am bothered, or cheated, or insulted, I get
a nice woman to talk to me; and it is as good as a pipe of the best
birdseye; which you can have at the same time, if you know how to do

“You seem to look at things for your own advantage only,” I answered,
because I thought these views low; “however I will do as you wish; and
Sunday is a dreadful day for me here, without any work. I thought last
Sunday would never end; and not being a woman, I could not come and
comfort you.”

I was pleased with this rap at him; because I could not see what
business he had with nice women, and so on; whether they came to his
house to talk with him, or whether he went to have his pipe at theirs,
as he had almost let out by his last words. For there never was a
woman who could stop him of a pipe in his own house—that was certain.
But that he should talk of my being stubborn, amused me, every time I
thought of it. Verily if I had a splinter of that substance in me, he
was the oak from which it came; and he might have spared enough to roof
a church, without anybody asking how he was.

Now he wrote to my aunt that I was coming, according to her proposal,
and he made Tabby Tapscott come up to the cottage, and pack up a few
things for me, inasmuch as I had no one now to do it. And he had his
best strawberries picked in the morning, before the sun margarined
them, and kept in a cold place till I was ready, and then packed so
that no heat could get at them. And as _Spanker_ had not been to London
for three days, he was sure to strike out at a merry pace, when he
found himself free of the country. For I never saw a horse that liked
to go to London; any more than a man loves a cemetery.

_Spanker_ was as gay as May, as soon as he knew where he was going; and
he roused up each hill with a rush from the other, which showed a deep
sense of Mechanics. Nobody would have believed his age, even if he had
told it truly; which he had strong human reason for not attempting,
having found his teeth filed quite early.

What with the brisk air of those hills, and the soft turn of the
valleys, and the gaiety of the time of year, a quantity of heaviness
went from me, and a vein of health flowed in. Not that I ever said to
myself—as people of inconstant nature do,—“There are better fish in the
sea,” etc.; or, “If she be not fair to me;” or even so much as, “Care
killed the cat.” My mood was neither independent nor defiant, and I
felt as respectful towards women as ever. It was only that more hope
came inside me, from seeing so much in the world outside; and perhaps
more faith in the Lord, because He was doing His best so largely.
However, I never thought twice about that, and must claim no credit for

Aunt Parslow was not very gracious at first, though she could not find
fault with the strawberries. She pretended that she had some quite as
good; though she declared herself to be most grateful. But as soon
as I said, “Send for some of your own; that will be the true proof
of the pudding, aunt,” she discovered that her own were not quite at
their best just now, and in fact they had been so good, that the slugs
and the blackbirds could not resist them. This showed very little
self-command on their part; for there was not a good fruit among them,
as I found out on Sunday, the beds being a mixture of some twenty
kinds, growing in great tussocks, and for the most part barren, which
was just as well.

I let my aunt have her own way, as a man should let all women
do, except those of his own household; and by-and-by she became
more pleasant, especially when she had discovered—as she did at
dinner-time—that my present state of health required a bottle of
her dry champagne. Being compelled myself, I thought it just to use
coercion too, and had the satisfaction soon of finding her much more
ladylike. Her coldness towards me passed away, and when we had clinked
our glasses twice, we resumed our proper footing.

“You don’t fill up,” she said more than once, and I found the same
fault with her; and when that error had been removed, we could enter
into one another’s feelings.

“The great thing you want is nourishment,” she said, when I had made
a noble dinner; “people in the present age never attach sufficient
importance to that point. They indulge too much in stimulants—no more,
Kit, no more, or at the outside, only half fill your own, for you
require it—while they scarcely allow themselves time to take the proper
amount of substance. Through a very old and deeply respected friend of
our family in the City, a man of the loftiest principles, I am enabled
to get the real turtle at half-price; and it has been instrumental,
under Providence, in the restoration of your health. I have sent him a
telegram; and to-morrow, although it is the Sabbath-day, we shall find
a tin here, when we return from church. It is better than Grove’s, or
any that you see in the windows going down Cheapside. A turtle should
never be allowed to sprawl about barbarously in the sun. It is against
his nature, and it does him harm. He becomes demoralized, and looses
firmness. They say that we all spring from turtles now; but I cannot
believe it; for cannibalism is never nice, and turtle is. What a turtle
your Uncle Cornelius would have made!”

“I am glad that you find him so nice,” I replied; “but he would always
have tasted of tobacco.”

“Well, we must allow for one another; and there is no accounting for
tastes. _Jupiter_ likes turtle; but the other dogs won’t touch it. I
had a dog once who would eat cigars. If he found a stump in the road,
it was quite as good as a bone to him; but he did not live very long,
poor fellow! Now let them take away the things; and when you have
had your glass of port, come to me in the drawing-room. Don’t hurry,
because I mean to have my nap.”

As yet, she had never mentioned Kitty’s name, which surprised me not a
little; but I thought it likely that she was still rather sore at my
behaviour. For when she had come to see us lately, it had been more
than I could bear to listen calmly while everybody offered any sort of
guess; just as they might discuss a case of abduction in the papers, or
the theft of a female dog, who “answered to the name of Kitty.”



EVERY allowance should be made for a man who is in deep trouble. Not
because it is his due, for that would count but little; but because he
expects it, which he never does of his other debts, after experience.
But he does hope to receive fine feeling, when he knows how cheap it
is; and his sense of bad luck blackens in him, when he cannot even get
that much.

And yet he ought to feel how trumpery are his trivial joys and sorrows,
in the whirligig of this great world. He does his utmost thus to take
it; to shudder at the wrongs of others, and to glow at their redress,
to suck his fingers more and more with the relish of his neighbour’s
pie; and perhaps with practice he begins to get some moonlight pleasure
thus. But, alas! before he is perfect in it, some little turn of
thought comes home, some soft remembrance thrills his heart, as the
sun quivers in a well-spring, and all his nature lets him know that he
belongs to it, and is itself.

A little touch of this kind took me, when I was full of higher things,
or at least was trying so to be. I had not been to church since my
day of dole, my day of doom and desolation. How could I go to Sunbury
church, and see the spot where Kitty stood and stole my whole
devotion, and see the altar-rails where she had knelt and vowed herself
mine for ever; and now, with no Kitty at my side, be stared at by a
hundred eyes, all asking—“Well, how do you get on?” But now in this
strange place, I went to the Sunday morning service, though Kitty had
been there too with me, in the happy days not long gone by. My aunt
came with me, and with much fine feeling allowed me to sit where my
dear had sat, and to put my hat on the selfsame peg on which she had
placed it for me.

At first it was a bitter time; but I went through it bravely, though
at first I could not bring myself to open the Prayer-book, which I had
brought in the bag with my clothes from Sunbury. My wife had given
it to me at Baycliff, when I happened to admire it in a window, and
I remembered that she had written “Kit,” and nothing else, on the

But the first psalm for that morning service, being a very sad one,
suited my state of mind so well that I opened my book to follow it. And
I remember reading with all my heart—“My heart is smitten down, and
withered like grass; so that I forget to eat my bread. I am become like
a pelican in the wilderness; and like an owl that is in the desert.”

Perhaps through the shaking of my thumb, the cover of the book fell
back, and showed me some words on the fly-leaf written with a pencil by
my own wife. Before the word “Kit,” which was in ink, she had written
with a pencil “Darling,” and after it, “God’s will be done.” The
writing was faint, as if the pencil wanted cutting, and it seemed to
have been dashed off in great haste.

This then was her farewell to me. I was sure that the words had not
been there, the last time I used the Prayer-book; and indeed there
would have been no meaning in them. Over and over again I read them,
forgetting everything else, I fear, and standing up after the first
lesson had begun, until my aunt gave my coat a jerk. I longed to rush
out of the church and think; and the rest of the service went by me, as
a dream.

Though very little light was thrown hereby upon my dark enigma, I found
more comfort perhaps than reason would warrant, in this discovery. In
the first place, if my wife had left me, in bitterness at some fancied
wrong, she would never have addressed me thus; and this alone removed a
weight of misery from my bosom. For it had been agony to me to think,
as I could not help doing, that my own Kitty all the while was nursing
bitterness against me, as if it had been possible for me to wrong
her. And again that she should not have gone entirely without a word,
was a piece of real comfort to me; though others, who have not been
so placed, may think that I was foolish there. Very likely I was; but
never mind. The Prayer-book, as we all acknowledge, is a very noble
work; and nobody can write such English now, as is to be found in it at
every page; and I think that Kitty was quite right in choosing it for
her last word to me. But if it comes to that, she was always right; at
least according to my ideas.

Strange as it may seem to some—who cannot enter into odd states of
mind, such as long had been my lot—I did not say a word, as yet, to my
Aunt Parslow about this matter. She had formed her own theory, like
everybody else, and I meant to let her go through with it. And so she
did, that afternoon, having put great pressure upon herself—for my
sake, as she told me—to enable her to hold her tongue, until she could
speak with advantage, and without any risk of being taken by any one
for a meddler.

For she liked to dine early on Sundays, and she always denied herself
the pleasure of going to church in the afternoon, being one of the
most unselfish persons I have ever met with. After a dinner not to
be gainsaid, at any rate till supper-time, we sat in the garden and
listened to the bells, and thought with pleasure of the congregation
now going to have a hot time of it. I was full of tender recollections,
for this was the very spot where Kitty had shown some delightful want
of reason about Sally Chalker. And I told my aunt all about it now,
with a sigh at the back of every smile. Then she laughed with superior
wisdom, and no longer could contain herself.

“I knew she was a jealous little puss. Every woman has her fault,
almost as much as men have. It took me a long time to discover any
fault in her, until I started that idea myself. To make up for the want
of other faults, she has that one to an extreme, you see. And that is
at the bottom of your present trouble, my poor boy. But she has carried
it to an extreme, I admit. It seems a little too absurd.”

“It is too absurd to be thought of twice,” I answered rather savagely;
“my Kitty is not quite a fool. And she would have been something worse
than a fool, if she had acted from that motive. She would have been
unjust and cruel, not to afford me so much as a chance of clearing
myself from wicked lies. Our married life was short indeed; but long
enough for her to learn that I am not a scoundrel.”

“Don’t be so hot, Kit. You have no idea what a woman’s mind is. She
thought you, of course, a perfect angel, and herself not good enough to
wipe your shoes. She was always humble, as you know; and that tyrant of
a woman must have beaten into her poor head a bitter sense of her own
defects. It is only natural, she would think, that this great wonder of
a man should want some one better than poor me. And when some villain
laid before her some strong evidence, we know not what, she would say
to herself—‘It is as I thought. I will not trouble him to explain. I
will leave him for a while, and perhaps his love will return, when he
has lost me. With this in my heart, I could not bear to look at him,
and know all the while he was longing to be rid of me. I will have no
scene, which would only make him think even less of me than he does.’
And so she would go, without caring where.”

“Possibly, aunt, some women might have done so. But not Kitty. She felt
to her heart my affection for her; and she trusted me, as I trusted
her. Do you suppose that if what you say had even seemed possible to
me, I should have remained, as I have done, waiting for some news of
her. I should have rushed up to every one, who had any motive for
deceiving her, and taken them by the throat, and wrung their wicked,
murderous lies out. No, it is something much worse than that. If Kitty
had left me in petulance, would she have written these last words,
would she have called me her ‘darling Kit’? See what I found this

“That proves nothing,” resumed my aunt, when I had shown her my
Prayer-book, and we had discussed that matter; “she may very well have
relented, at the last moment, and written that to you.”

“Then would she have taken all our money? Was that the way to cure my
jealousy, and bring me back to her in penitence? She had a right to the
money, because you put it into her own hand. But I am astonished at her
taking it.”

Miss Parslow was even more astonished, when I told her that part of the
tale, which I had begged Uncle Corny not to do. It grieved me that she
should ever hear of it; but she certainly had the right to know.

“Perhaps you told her in so many words that you meant it entirely for
herself,” I suggested, hoping that it might be so; for, little as I
cared for that trumpery loss, I was cut to the quick that my wife
should have inflicted it; “Kitty must have believed it her own, or she
never would have touched it.”

“I said nothing of the kind,” my aunt replied indignantly; “I gave it
to her, but I meant it for you—that is to say conjointly. Her taking it
was robbery, and nothing else.”

I laughed a little at these words, which I had heard from other
quarters. That my Kitty should be called a robber, seemed a little too
absurd. But I could not be angry in the teeth of facts, at any rate
with the donor.

“I’ll tell you what it is,” she said, even as I had been told before;
“either your wife is as deep a little hypocrite as ever lived, which
I cannot believe, for I should never trust any one again if I did; or
else she ran away from you in a moment of insanity. My poor boy, I am
so sorry for you. I cannot bear to ask you, but have you ever noticed
any tendency that way—anything even odd, or absent, or inconsequential
in her manner? The professor is a very queer man, I have heard. All
great men of science are—well, to say the least eccentric.”

“Captain Fairthorn is perfectly sound and clear-headed, though
not a good man of business. And his daughter is as rational as I
am—much more so, if I am to endure much more of this. She is quick,
and bright-witted, and full of common sense; except that, like her
father, she is a little too confiding. I never saw a token of even the
slightest absence of mind about her. Her only insanity was that she
loved me a great deal better than she loved herself. I believe she
would have laid down her life with pleasure—”

“Don’t talk about it, my dear Kit. I think you have borne things
wonderfully well, now that I know all you have told me. And you must
not break down now, my dear. All will come right in the end, be sure,
although we are in thick darkness now. In spite of all difficulties, I
still hold to my idea of jealousy. However, we won’t talk of that any
more. You know that I called upon Miss Coldpepper, the last time I was
at Sunbury?”

“Yes. But I never heard what she said. I cannot see how she could help
us at all.”

“Well, I thought it worth while to try; and I found her much kinder
than I expected. A little bit stiff at first perhaps, and rather of
the grand lady style; but I am sure that she would help you, if she
could. She likes Kitty better than her own nieces; that I am quite sure
of; and she does not side a bit with that horrid Mrs. Fairthorn, at
least as everybody makes her out, though I always form my own opinion.
She perceived, of course, that I was a lady, and not to be treated as
a fruit-grower might be, such as everybody looks upon as a sort of
apple-pie. I explained that my connection with your Uncle Orchardson
was casual, and had been against my wishes; while my family had been
in the China-trade; and she asked very kindly, if I would have a cup
of tea. I accepted, because I knew how it makes ladies talk. Then she
asked me what I thought of it, and I said it was poor stuff; for I had
no idea of being patronized by her, and I saw that she had sense enough
to like the truth, especially when it was to her advantage, although
not very complimentary. Then she asked me where she could get a better
article; and I told her that I never recommended any place, having
nothing to do with any business now, but living in a very pretty place
of my own. Naturally this made her press me more; and not liking to
be disagreeable, I told her of a place, where by taking twelve pounds
she could get a tea worth two of hers, for fifteen pence a pound
less money. And this made a very fine impression upon her; for she
loves good value for her money. Then she became very gracious indeed;
especially after her cur of a dog came in, and smelling souvenirs of
my high breed, did his utmost to improve himself, by licking them. For
your sake, Kit, I was obliged to say, that the wretched mongrel looked
well-bred. Oh dear, oh dear!”

“Well, never mind, aunt; he has done me a good turn—” I remembered in
time to stop sharply. My Aunt Parslow would take it as worse than high
treason, that I should have stolen even such a dog; and how could I
call it a good turn now?

“No dog would do you a bad turn, Kit,” she continued quite serenely;
“at any rate no well-bred dog; they are as good as a woman, and
infinitely better than any man, in judging human character. Now listen
to what I have to say. I am not very sharp, for I live out of the
world; and everybody owns that it gets much worse, from year to year,
and from day to day. But I don’t care twopence for that, my dear,
because nothing I can do will alter it. Only I am as sure as I am of
the nature of the very best dog I ever had—and there he lies, beneath
that tree—that your Kitty has never done a thing to wrong you, at
least according to her view of things. I will not attempt to explain
that money matter; for it is beyond me, and I am sorry that I spoke so
harshly. I should have considered your feelings more, for I know that
you are as true as steel. There is some black secret that we cannot
pierce; it will all become clear as the day, in time; and in time,
I hope, for your happiness. I can well understand that you have been
stopped in all your inquiries, by that strange device—for I believe it
to be but another device, on the part of some very crafty foe. You have
let some weeks go by, through that. No good has ever come, so far as
I know, of any of those ‘Private Inquiry’ places; and I hate the very
name of them. But I think that you are bound to watch the proceedings
of those two villains, who carried off your Kitty, to that vile place
near Hounslow. Of course, they would never take her there again. That
you have ascertained long ago. And I do not believe that they have
got her now. She would be no good to them, as a married woman. But
they know where she is. I am sure of that. You have been in a maze of
dejection and distress. And your pride has prevented you from doing
what you should have done. Go and see those two men. Hunt them out.
Take the matter entirely into your own hands. Your Uncle Cornelius is
very good and kind. But it is not his wife who is missing.”

“Those two men are not in London. That much has been ascertained,” I
said; “and it does not appear that they were in London, at the time—at
the time of my trouble.”

“Never mind. Find out where they are. Follow them; never mind where it
is. As for money, you shall have another hundred pounds, and a thousand
if it proves needful. Don’t thank me, Kit. It is for my own peace. I
have not enjoyed seeing a dog eat his dinner, since this wickedness was
done. You shall thank me as much as ever you like, when you have got
your Kitty back again. And she will love you ten times more than ever.”



IT is vain for any man to say that, in the deepest depths of woe, he
can receive no scrap of comfort from the tenderness of others. Words
may help him very little; commonplace exhortations are a weariness
to the worn-out soul; he lies at the bottom of his own distress, and
does not want it probed or touched. But gradually a little light and
warmth steal through the darkness, not direct from heaven alone, but
reflected from kind eyes and hearts. He is not alone in the world,
although he ever must be lonely; and the sense of other life than his
restores him slowly to his own.

After all the kindness shown me, and the good-will wholly undeserved, I
felt ashamed to be so swallowed up by my own sorrow. Some indulgence I
might claim from people of kindly nature, on the ground that it was not
sorrow only, but dark mystery and doubt, and even some sense of black
disgrace, which had robbed me of my proper vigour and due power of
manhood. And it is more than likely that the long and wasting illness,
from which I had not yet quite recovered, still impaired the force and
tone of mind as well as body. But I do not want to make excuses, as
people nearly always say in the very breath they make them with. Only I
was now resolved that no more should be needed.

On the Monday, I drove _Spanker_ home; which was a great delight to
him, and to me as well, for the world looked brighter, when my face
was set to fight it. Or rather I should say, to fight that vile and
wicked part of it, which had robbed me of my just claim to a happy
though humble place in it. In my breast-pocket I carried the book
containing my wife’s last words to me; for my good Aunt Parslow had
kindly stitched it in a white kid glove, or a pair of them, which had
been white in their early days. And in the pocket on the other side,
I carried fifty pounds in bank-notes, so as to be able to start well,
and procure better judgment than my own, if it should appear advisable.
But about that I was not sure as yet; being very loth to ask any other
man’s opinion, however old he might be, about my pretty Kitty.

It was now the longest day, which is the most excellent and perfect
time of year, in at least three years out of every four. Sometimes
there arises a strong hot June; but scarcely more than once in twenty
summers; and then, before the days come to their turn, leaves are
getting flabby, and the grass is over-ripe, and the petals of the wild
rose lie in the ditch, and the blossom of the wheat has dropped, its
little quivery bee’s-wing. More often there has been a black Pentecost,
a May of lowering skies and blight, with every animal’s coat put the
wrong way on his back; and then a June of shrink and shiver, without
a fair flower in the garden, and with the hedgerows full of black
caterpillars. And every man flaps himself with his arms, like a cock
when he springs up to crow; but the hedger and ditcher has nothing to
crow at, and is too hoarse to do it, if he had.

But now we had a very fair midsummer, neither too hot nor too cold; and
the air was not only fresh but soft, and full of sweet yet invigorating
smells. At the top of every hill, one seemed to sniff the rich calm of
the valley, and again in the valley to feel the crisp air of the hill
coming down for a change of mood; there was nothing to make much fuss
about in the way of striking scenery; but a pretty peep could be had
at almost every turn of travelling, where green leaves softened the
brilliant sky, and sheep and cattle, in quiet pastures, showed that
they accepted life, as if it were a blessing.

But I found my uncle regarding life from a very different point of
view. He had brought all his strawberry-pickers in at three o’clock
that morning, to make the great hit of the summer, as he hoped, in
the Monday forenoon market. At six a.m. he had sent off about five
hundredweight of prime fruit, all in pound punnets with dewy leaves,
as fresh as the daybreak, and as bright as the sun, before it leaves
off blushing. But ere he could put one upon his stand, one hundred
and twenty tons of French stuff, which had been discharged the night
before, were running, like a flood from some horse-knacker’s, in every
alley of the market. This refuse was offered, by the bucketful, at a
penny a pound, which was too much for it; a dumpy, and flabby, and
slimy mass, fit for children to make dirt pies of. Of course the good
buyers would not look at it, for no man could put it in his window. But
the British public could put it in their stomachs, which is not at all
a choice receptacle; and the mere fact of its presence took the shine
out of all fair English fruit. Uncle Corny’s choice _Presidents_, and
_Dr. Hoggs_, as good as if they leaped from stalk to lip, became jam
for the Juggernauth of free trade; and he was left lamenting, as well
as swearing very hard.

Whenever he had used strong language,—however well justified by
international law—he was apt to show less of true penitence, than of
anger with the world that had made him do it. Being a righteous man, he
always felt ashamed; but he never was known to retract an expression;
though he often declared that his words had been too weak, and he
wished he had said what he was charged with saying. But Selsey Bill
told me that he had been “just awful,” and they were expecting beer all
round, as a token of remorse. “Said a’ would sack every son of a gun of
us! Never knowed ’un say that, wi’out sending can out by-and-by. Ah,
he is a just man, Master Kit, if ever was one.”

“Glad to see you, Kit,” said my uncle, who was getting, with the aid
of a pipe, into his right mind. “You are looking ever so much better,
my boy. Can’t return the compliment, I fear. The fact is, I have been
a little put out; though I never lost my temper, as most people would
have done. Fearful smash this morning at the Garden. But all the poor
fellows did their very best, and it would not be fair to punish them.
They’ve been hard at it, ever since three o’clock. You might take the
four-gallon can, if you like, just to show them that you are come home
again. And I daresay you’ll be glad of a glass yourself, for the roads
are getting dusty. You can come and talk to me, when you’ve been round.
Only half a pint each for the women, mind. It would never do to get
them into bad habits. Unless any of them has a baby.”

When I had discharged that little duty, I told him of all that my aunt
had said, and showed him the message to me in the book, if indeed it
could be called a message. He shook his head very wisely over this, and
told me that he must think about it; for he could not at present see
the meaning of it. But I saw that it altered his opinion of the case.

“You have been up to the cottage already, I see,” he continued, as
I sat quietly, after vainly searching once more the columns of his
paper the _Standard_, as I daily did; “you will never find any notice
there, my boy, nor in any other paper. It is the blackest puzzle I ever
came across; and this only makes it the blacker. Mother Bull is come
back”—he should have said, “the Honourable Mrs. Bulwrag Fairthorn”—“I
was told so yesterday by that good woman, who came down when you were
so ill. You know the woman I mean—Mrs. Wilcox. She was down here
yesterday to ask for you, and was very sorry not to find you. She said
that if Mother Bull had not been away, she could have sworn that it was
all her doing. But now she doubts whether she knew anything about it;
for when she does a thing, she always does it by herself, and never
trusts any one with her wicked works. Mrs. Wilcox has not heard a word
from your wife, as I need not tell you; but she flies in a fury at the
smallest hint that there can be any fault on her part. She says that
poor Kitty could never plot anything, even if she wished it. Her mind
is too simple, and she could never carry out any plan requiring sharp
management. I asked her what she thought of it all, and she could think
of nothing at all worth speaking of. Only that there is something we
don’t know—which I could have told her, without walking a mile. But
I think it might do you good to go and see her; and it would comfort
you at any rate, for she holds all your own opinions. And she said
one thing which I thought right, and sharper of her than I expected,
for it never had occurred to me—that you should take in one of those
scientific journals, which give an account of discoveries and all that;
so as to find out, if you can, where Professor Fairthorn is.”

“How can that do any good.” I asked. “He had sailed at least ten days
before I was forsaken, and while we were down at Baycliff. The telegram
from Falmouth proved all that.”

“That is clear enough. And of course he cannot help us, while he is far
away at sea. But for all that, we are bound to let him know, if there
should be any chance. You would write to him, or write at him, if his
daughter was dead; and it is very much the same case now.”

“Uncle Corny, you have the most coldblooded way sometimes, though you
never mean it. Certainly I am bound to let him know, if I can; and I
ought to have thought of it before. But he has given us little of his
company. I will go and see Mrs. Wilcox to-morrow, if only to find out
what paper to get; for she will know what they used to take in. And I
shall find out what is going on up there; though I don’t see how it
will help me much.”

“When that dog was stolen from Miss Coldpepper,” said my uncle, without
meaning any harm, “by some big rogue in London, what did she do? Why,
she offered a reward at once, and sent posters right and left. And what
was the result? Why, the dog came back almost before she had time to
miss him.”

“But if he came back without any reward, what could the reward have to
do with it?”

“How do you know that no reward was paid?” My uncle seemed quite to
look suspicious; but perhaps it was my conscience that made him do it.
“We can’t tell what happened between them, up there.”

“Certainly not,” I replied with haste; “but I don’t like talking about
a dog, in the same breath with my Kitty.”

“I did not mean to annoy you, Kit,” he answered very humbly; “although
the poor lady may have felt it bitterly, in her little way. All that
I meant was, that we might have offered a large reward for any
information. It could have done no harm, you know. And it might have
come to Kitty’s ears, and inclined her to come back to us. Women are so
glad to save expense.”

“How can you understand such things? As if I could bear to fetch my
wife home, by jingling a purse before the world! If she won’t come back
without that, she had better—she had better almost stay away.”

“Very well. I can understand your feelings; and very likely I should
have the same. You are like me, Kit, in many things; although a deal
more obstinate.”

My uncle was fond of saying this; but it always took my breath away,
from the sublimity of his self-ignorance. It was like an oak-tree
bidding an osier not to be so gnarled and stiff.

“Now remember one thing,” he went on, as he saw me smiling just a
little; “in spite of your stubbornness, you shall obey me, or I will
know the reason why. You have tried what good hard work would do, and
it has done you more harm than good. Because your mind has not been in
it, and you have only been fretting at every stroke, though you stuck
to it, like a Briton. To-day you are twice the man, because you have
had a little change, and seen a little of a different life, and allowed
yourself to speak more freely of your sad affairs, instead of snapping
at every one who mentioned them. Henceforth you shall never do more
than eight hours’ work in these gardens in one day, I mean of course
all by yourself. For sixteen hours every day, you have avoided every
one, and carried on work, work, all alone, as if you never meant to
speak again. I am pretty tough; but it would have killed me, although I
am no chatterbox. And it has gone some way towards killing you. I left
you to your own foolish plan, because of your confounded obstinacy. But
now, I will try to be as stubborn myself. I will come after you, with
my supple-jack, unless you give me your word on this. And another thing
you must bear in mind. You have taken your good aunt’s money for a
particular purpose; and you will have had it on false pretences, if you
go on thus.”

“I intend to use it for what she meant. I would never have taken it
otherwise. You shall not complain of my sticking too close, but rather
of my absence. But I shall not draw my weekly money from you, unless I
have done a good week’s work. To-morrow I shall do very little, because
I am going to London. To-night I shall work for an hour or two,
because I have a job to finish. And I will look in, when you are having
your last pipe.”

There was every promise of a fruitful season, though not without plenty
to grumble at, for I never knew a season good all round, such as more
favoured countries have. After getting myself into working trim, I left
my lonely little dwelling, with the front door so arranged that any one
who knew the trick could enter without knocking. And in the kitchen
fireplace—for I never used the parlour now—I left a little coke alight,
so that it would smoulder on for hours, and could soon, with the aid
of wood and coal, be nursed into glow enough to boil the kettle, which
stood ready upon the hob. For I always fancied, when I went to work,
that I might find my wife, when I should come home, making it a home
for me once more, and listening to the singing of the kettle. And I
left the lane door unfastened too, that she might have no trouble to
get in.

Somehow or other, I seemed to feel that something strange would befall
me that night, but I went about my work as usual. I had a large
peach-tree to go over, for the second time that season, fetching every
shoot into place, checking or sometimes cutting out the over-coarse
and sappy growth, nipping every blistered leaf, removing the fruit,
where it grew too thick or had no chance of swelling, and offering the
many other small attentions, without which fine fruit may not be. And
outside the border on the gravel walk I had the garden engine full of
water for the nightly bath, which fruit and foliage in warm weather
love, as much as vermin hate it.

The sun had been down for an hour or more, and the dusk was deepening
into night, and I was just at the point of leaving off for fear of
hammering the wrong sort of nail—when I heard a little sound, like
the scraping of a twig, and turning my head, without any great hurry,
beheld, as distinctly as I see this paper, the face of a man looking
steadfastly at me. It was a large and solid face, as calm and unmoved
as the full moon appears rising out of the haze on a fine summer night.

I could see no hat above the face, nor any human figure below it, only
a face looking through a gap in a clipped _arbor vitæ_ tree, about
fifteen yards from where I stood. It was gazing at me quite serenely,
and as if I were hardly worth the trouble.

Through all the time of my long distress, I had wholly lost the sense
of fear—bodily fear I mean, and nervous trembling, such as brave men
have. This had surprised me more than once; things that used to make
me jump had not the least effect on me. The reason was simply that my
life was not of the smallest value to me. And I wondered that I was not
frightened now, because I knew that I ought to be.

Without even taking my hammer up, I leaped across the border, to seize
this fellow; but my foot caught in something, and down I went. A heavy
garden-line had been left, stretched along by one of our men, who had
been “making up the edge” that day. I knew it was there, but had not
thought of it in my hurry; and now I was lame in both knees for a
minute, for the shock had been very violent. At first I thought that my
left leg was broken; but after a bit of rubbing it got better, and I
hobbled towards the _Thuja_ tree, which had been clipped into the shape
of a fiddle by Bill Tompkins.

I dragged myself round it; but saw no one, nor even a footprint in the
waning of the light; neither was there any sound among the trees beyond
it. Wondering greatly, and very angry with the fellow who had left the
line there, I collected my tools with some difficulty, and was obliged
to leave the tree unsyringed. Then, as I went stiffly home, I thought
of the fuss my Kitty would have made, to see me in that bleeding
hobble; and if I was weak in body through it, I fear that I was weaker
still in mind.



AT this time, I slept, or lay down to sleep, on a couple of good-sized
chairs in the kitchen, with a cushion laid along them, which had come
from my uncle’s pew in Sunbury church. He had established a new cushion
there, on the strength of my marriage and Kitty’s good clothes; and the
old one, being stuffed with sound horsehair, was not to be despised
when upside down. And to save all risk of rolling off, I set it against
the front legs of the dresser. The door of the room was left wide open,
and the front door also, unless the night was windy; for I had nothing
to lose, having lost my all; and I only wished that anybody would come
and try to rob me. It would have been bad for him, unless he had been
either Hercules, of Ulysses; for I was armed with recklessness, and
eager to tackle any open foe. Nervousness (such as a happy man may
feel, when he hears a strange noise in the dead of the night) was an
unknown power to me now, and I would have fought, like a bull-dog in
his own kennel, and enjoyed it. This was not the proper turn of mind
for a young man to indulge in. That I knew as well as could he; but the
blame lay elsewhere.

Although I was very stiff and sore from the bruises of that awkward
fall, I went at daylight to examine the place, where that stranger
must have stood. The ground was dry and hard just there; but I found
enough to show me that I had not been deceived by any trick of the
imagination. Not only had the soil been trodden by a foot unlike my
own, but the thick mat of the _Thuja_ tree had some of the lobed leaves
(which composed it and stood together like moss compressed), ruffled
and crushed into one another, as if by the thrust of a heavy form. Then
I went to the place where I had stood over against the peach-tree,
and put my hat on a nail to represent my height, and returning to the
clipped tree gazed through the nick of the fiddle at it, just as the
face had gazed at me. I was obliged to stoop, to bring my eyes to the
level at which those eyes had been; which showed that my visitor had
been of some three or four inches lower stature, probably not more than
five feet ten.

I could not trace his footsteps far, nor make out what kind of boots
he wore, except that there was no sign of hob-nails, such as all our
workmen had. It struck me that a man with such a face was not very
likely to hurry himself, and the ground bore no traces of hasty flight,
neither were the branches of the plum-trees (through which he must
have retreated) broken. Probably he had retired at his leisure, while
I was disabled from following. There were no signs of entrance to be
discovered at or near the door into Love Lane; all our men had left
work at the time of his visit, and no one had seen any stranger.

What on earth had he come for? was the question which arose, and could
not be answered. There was nothing much to steal just there, for
none of the tree-fruit was ripe; and though darkness forbade entire
certainty, I felt pretty sure that the owner of that face would call
himself a gentleman. It seemed to me better upon the whole to say
nothing about the matter, for my uncle would probably laugh at it, as
the product of my imagination; and as for the police, I knew too well
that they would make nothing out of it. Only it was evident to my mind
that this little adventure had some bearing on my trouble; and in
spite of the dusk, I could swear to that face, wherever I should come
across it.

My uncle would have stopped me from going to London, on account of the
injuries which I could not hide, for my hands as well as my knees were
cut. But I went by the ’bus, being very lame as yet, and unable to walk
without aid of a stick. Mrs. Wilcox received me very kindly, and I was
glad to find her business thriving, and the sharp boy released from the
pots, and growing very useful at the counter.

“It has done him a deal of good, indeed it has, Mr. Kit,” she said,
when I ventured to hint that his employment had not been elevating; “he
knows every soul it is safe to give tick to; and as for bad shillings,
of which I had a dozen, not one have we took since he come back. Ah,
what a tradesman he will make! But now, sir, about your poor dear self.
No one to stitch your knees better than that—ah, the righteous is
always punished in this earth.”

I told her exactly how things stood—that everything was as dark as
ever, that the neighbourhood had been searched in vain (as might have
been expected), that one or two false clues had been followed, not by
myself, but by the police, and that now I meant to take the matter
entirely into my own hands, as I should have done at first except for
a private reason, which I told her, to wit the disappearance of the
money. She was angry that this should have been allowed to hinder me
even for a day. But when I told her how it weighed upon my spirits,
and seemed to show that my wife was not at all in her duty to me,
Mrs. Wilcox sided with me, and said that every one must do the same,
whether I were right in the end or wrong. And then I asked her what she
thought; and she said that she was afraid to say.

“Not that I don’t know her, sir,” she proceeded when she saw my
disappointment; “as well as the inside of my own shoe, having had
her almost from the bottle, and cut the best of her teeth on my own
thumb. But they changes so, when they falls in love, as I know from my
own experience, though going on then for thirty-five, that to make a
prediction comes back on the mouth. I began it already; but it turned
out wrong; and I said to myself—‘If you want to be considered above the
average, as you always was, you better wait, and see how the cat jumps
first.’ For that is the way of the women, sir, in general.”

I was not in the mood to be satisfied with this, especially as she had
said the same thing to my uncle, as late as last Sunday. And gradually,
by coaxing her to begin, and then contradicting her upon some little
point of fact, I knew her opinions even better than my own, for my own
had less to go upon. For it must be borne in mind that most of what I
have entered about Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot and Mr. Donovan Bulwrag
comes from knowledge which I obtained long afterwards; and none of it
was, in my mind as yet, beyond what my Uncle Corny and Sam Henderson
had said, and the little that had been dropped by Kitty, who had
scarcely had three weeks as yet to talk.

“Well, I shall do this,” I said at last to Mrs. Wilcox; “you have told
me many things which will enable me to get on. Nothing can be worse
than things are now; and the greatest enemy I have got—if I am good
enough to have an enemy—cannot say that I have shown impatience. I have
felt enough of it; but nobody knows but myself how close I have kept
it. I mean to make no disturbance now; but I shall just go and see the
great lady.”

“You’d better not, sir,” cried Mrs. Wilcox; “you would be like a dummy,
if she chose to speak out, and the humour might be on her. And you
can’t get nothing out of her, except hard knocks.”

“Hard words break no bones, any more than soft ones butter parsnips. I
shall go and see her, if I can, and that villain of a son of hers as
well. It is my duty to discover where my Kitty’s father is.”

“She won’t see you, Mr. Kit, unless it is to triumph over you. She
loves doing that, when any one is down. But you won’t have a chance of
seeing Mr. Downy. They say he is out of the country altogether, though
my little Teddy swears he saw him Sunday night, and I never knew him
go wrong about a face before. But he must be wrong this time, if there
is any truth in words. And generally always he comes down this road,
whenever he is at home.”

“At any rate, I shall ask for him. By-the-bye, what is he like, if I
should chance to meet him?”

“He have a great square face, sir, like the front of a big head, with a
lot of sandy hair both above it and below. And he comes along the road
with his eyes half-shut, just as if there was nothing worth looking at.
And his eyes are as yellow as new-run honey, and a few butter-spots
upon his cheeks, where you can see them. He is a square-built young
man, not so tall as you, but thicker, and his legs come after him as he
walks, and he looks as if he never could be in a hurry.”

“Thank you. I think I ought to know him now. It will be my own fault
if I don’t. Not a pleasant man to look at, if you do him justice, Mrs.
Wilcox. No wonder that people don’t seem to like him very much.”

“Ever so much worse to deal with than he is to look at, Mr. Kit. Keep
out of his way, sir, that’s my advice. I believe he is at the bottom of
your trouble somehow. Though what good he can get out of it surpasses

After begging her to keep a sharp look-out, and to send for me at once
if she saw anything suspicious, I made the best of my way towards
“Bulwrag Park,” and was amazed at the change a few months had wrought.
All the wilderness of work stood thick with houses, all the sloughs of
despond were firm hard roads, young trees were in leaf where surveyor’s
flags had waved, and public-houses blazed with glass and gilt where
bricks had smouldered. The Great Exhibition was in full swing, and the
long streets were alive with cabs and broughams. However, the old house
still looked grim and gaunt in its dark retirement, and the Scotch firs
near it were as black as ever; and I passed with a throbbing heart
the bay-tree which had sheltered my love and myself from the snow. I
ventured to gather a spray of this, and put it as a keepsake beside my

After two or three rings, I was admitted, and shown into the place I
knew so well, and it seemed to my fancy to be glistening still with the
tearful eyes of my darling. Then Miss Geraldine, the younger and more
gentle of the daughters, came and looked at me with some surprise, and
said that she would show me where her mother was, and I followed her
into a morning room.

The great lady looked as well as ever, and received me with a
stateliness which reminded me of her sister. She was beautifully
dressed, so far as I could judge, and seemed in high good humour, and
inclined to patronize me.

“Mr. Orchardson, I think you said, my dear? Mr. Orchardson, who married
our poor Kitty. Well, Mr. Orchardson, I hope that you are happy.
But surely—surely she did not do this? And if she did, you must not
appeal to us. Sometimes she forgot herself—but still—and quite in the
honeymoon—no, I am sure it cannot be.”

I was determined not to be provoked, although it was very hard upon me.
This violent woman was pretending to believe that the scratches on my
face, from last night’s fall, were inflicted by my dear wife’s nails.
I did not condescend to answer that; and I was certain that she knew I
had no Kitty now.

“I have ventured to intrude upon you,” I said, “upon a matter of
important business, madam. To ask if you will kindly tell me how I can
send a letter, so as to reach Captain Fairthorn. He is at sea, I know,
upon a voyage of exploration, or something like that; and it may be
very difficult to communicate with him. But I have a very important

“Nothing amiss with your poor wife, I hope. Oh, I should be so grieved,
if there were anything of that sort. She was flighty and wild; but with
all her faults, there was much that was good about her. You could never
see it, Geraldine, as I did. Please don’t tell me, Mr. Orchardson, that
after all your goodness to her—for few would have married her knowing
what she was—she has had the heart to deceive you.”

“No, she has never deceived me, madam; there is no deceit in her
nature. But—but for some good reason doubtless,—for the present she has
left me.”

No one can tell what it cost me to drag out these words to her arch
enemy, who was taking them in, like a draught of nectar, not only for
the fact—which she had known when it occurred—but for the anguish they
were costing me.

But she kept her countenance, like a mighty actress, that she might
quaff her enjoyment at leisure to the dregs.

“I cannot understand what you say, Mr. Orchardson. It is simply
impossible that poor Kitty, that your bride, that your dear wife you
were so wrapped up in, should—should have run away from you.”

“I cannot say whether she ran, or walked, or how she went—but she is

“You astound me. Geraldine, you had better leave the room. Such things
are not fit for good young girls to listen to. Now, Mr. Orchardson,
tell me all about it. But first accept my sincere condolence. Although,
as you know, I was against the marriage, mainly for your sake, I can
assure you. I knew her so well—but so soon, oh, so soon! I could not
have expected it, even of her. And did she inflict these sad wounds,
before she went? A tender remembrance? Oh, it is so sad! But one thing
I must beg of you—do not be soured by it. Do not conclude, as most
young men would—that all women are bad, because this one has proved so
ungrateful to you. And after seven years of desertion, I believe you
will be at liberty to take a better wife.”

“I want no better wife. There could be no better wife. I love her
with all my heart, in spite of this mistake. And I will never look at
another woman, while I live.”

“What a noble husband! How could she run away? And doubtless with some
ignoble wretch—no other would have taken her from your arms. But when
did it happen? Do tell me all about it. And who has supplanted you,
so very, very quickly? One would hardly believe it in any story-book.
And you so devoted—oh, how your heart must ache! Do let me order you a
glass of wine.”

“No wine, thank you. And I cannot tell the story, which would only
increase your affliction, madam. Only one thing, in justice to my wife.
No one has supplanted me in her affection. She is as true to me, as I
am to her. She has been misled by some despicable trick. And, by the
God in heaven, I will kill the man who did it.”

“No horrible oaths before me, young man!” Her face, lips and all,
turned as white as a sheet, as I spoke with the whole fury of my soul
in voice and eyes,—the wrath of a quiet man wronged of his life.

Then we gazed into one another’s eyes, until she was obliged to turn

“I could not expect you to have good manners,” she said, after sitting
down, and expecting me to begin; “if you behaved like this, before your
wife, there might be some excuse for her running away. She has been
used to the society of gentlemen.”

“And that she has had in a humble way, since she became my wife. You
must thank yourself for what I said; for you laboured to goad me up to
it. And I mean it, madam. I spoke with no profanity. I am not given to
swearing. Whoever has done me this foul wrong has ruined my life, and
shall pay for it with his own. Give him warning of this, if you know
who he is. I have nothing more to say than that.”

Fear for the moment overcame her fury. And I left that house, with the
firm conviction that my misery as well as my happiness, had proceeded
from it.



HOTCHPOT HALL has been a fine old place, as any one would say who looks
at it; and it would have been a fine place still, if the owners had
been of like quality. “It taketh its name,” says an old county book,
“from a very ancient rule of law, that if sisters be in coparcenary, as
heiresses to landed estate, and one of them hath from the same source
a several estate by frank-marriage, she shall (as is just and seemly)
bring that into _hotchpot_, which signifieth a mixture for a pudding,
ere ever she can enjoy rights with the rest.”

Whether that be correct or otherwise, is far beyond my power to say,
for I know not what “frank-marriage” is—nor for the matter of that
“coparcenary”—but at any rate there stands the house, which savours
in some degree of a pudding, being built of many-coloured stones; and
the people for several generations have taken their name from this old

Though it stands in the midst of a flat and dreary country, with good
corn-land spread among desert fens, and fewer and smaller trees than
ours—for the glory of Middlesex is the noble elms—yet the house has
the advantage of a fine rise towards it, and a wide and open view for
many miles across the level. This gives it the air of an important
mansion, and one that deserves to be kept in good repair. But for three
generations now, the owners had been coming down in the world, by
reason of bad times, as they themselves declared, but as anybody else
would say, of their own badness. Till the last successor had scarcely
the right to call himself the owner.

Sir Cumberleigh Hotchpot was of good descent, if name may stand for
nature, on his mother’s as well as his father’s side; for his mother
had been Lady Frances Cumberleigh, the daughter of a North-country
Earl. But she had brought no increase to the family estates, and had
rather assisted to lessen them. And her son had pursued the same
course, by gambling, and a dissipated and rambling life. It was only by
sufferance now that he dwelt, when he fled from London creditors, in
one wing of the old house, till some one could be found, who would take
it upon a repairing lease, for it could not be sold to advantage.

This baronet was cunning, though he was not wise; and in spite of all
misfortune, he relied on little tricks to keep himself going, while
he still hoped to indulge in devices on a larger scale, to fetch
himself round. He took good care to reap his gains with the keenest
promptitude, while he left his losses to be gleaned by very tardy
process. And this had tended, more than once, to impair his popularity.

Sam Henderson came and said to me, while I was thinking what next to
do, after getting the better of one enemy—“Would you like to see old
Crumbly Pots?” Sam had been making money lately, and scorned anybody
who could not pay up—“It might do some good, and can do no harm. He
is ducking his head among his moats and meres because he was hard hit
at Ascot. He owes me five ponies; he was ass enough to back that cur
_Sylvester_, a nag who lays his ears back, the moment he is collared. I
am pretty flush now, and I don’t care to squeeze him; but I’m going to
the July, for one more spree, before being tethered finally. He won’t
dare to show his mug there; but you and I could toddle on to his earth,

I told Sam plainly that I did not understand the meaning of his
overture. But he only replied—“Then the more fool you. Can you
understand this—I am going to the July meeting at Newmarket, where
the best two-year-olds of the season come out, and you may see five
or six of old Chalker’s string. It would do you a deal of good to see
them, and take your mind out of your own hat; though you don’t know a
racehorse from your old _Spanker_. If you like to come with me I will
stand Sam, according to the meaning of my name and nature. I shall make
another hatful of money there, for cockering up the bridesmaids, and
that sort of thing; and after that we might rout up old Hotchpot.”

I perceived that Sam’s meaning was most friendly, and after consulting
Uncle Corny, who thought that I sadly wanted change of scene, and a
little more experience of the world, I arranged to go with Sam to
headquarters, as he called it, and after the racing should be over
to proceed to Hotchpot Hall, in Lincolnshire. Sam could procure me
admittance there; and I longed to come face to face with my old rival.

With the racing I was pleased, as any man must be at beholding noble
animals, and hoping that the best of them may win. Of the thousand
guiles and wiles, that defraud them of fair play, I was happy enough to
know nothing, and believed that the two legs across them were as honest
as their four. Yet I wondered sometimes; and it proved how little one
may judge of quality by appearance, and how true the Holy Scriptures
are, when the horse that seemed likely to be last came first.

Of Sam I saw little, for he was too busy, going the round both of
stables and of houses, and forming opinion less by eyes than ears, and
most of all by his own conscience, which told him how he would have
acted in the position of the rest. Sam had a conscience not only nimble
but extremely sensitive, which enabled him to judge that of other
sporting men perhaps less highly gifted. For these he charitably made
allowance, forgiving their defects when he pocketed their money.

“I have not done so badly,” he said on Friday night; “I made a fine
hit through old Roper. That old chap is worth a mint to me, for I know
every twist of his grand old mind. The professionals were cocksure that
_Columbine_ was meant, and she could not have lost if she had been.
How much have you won, Kit? I put you up neatly. You might have made a
hundred, without risk of a hair.”

“Well, I only bet half a crown, and that I lost. I think _Spanker_
could have beaten most of them. They don’t seem to me to go at any pace
at all.”

“That is what a greenhorn always thinks. If you were on their backs you
would soon find out the difference. Well, let’s have some supper, and
be off by the night mail. But you look queer. Have you met any one you
know, old chap?”

“Not a soul that I know, except Mr. Chalker; and I only know him by
sight. But this afternoon I saw a face that I have seen before, though
I have no idea who the owner is. I looked for you to tell me, but I
could not find you.”

“Very likely not. I went to see the saddling. You seem in a way about
it. What makes you take it up so?”

Upon this I told Henderson about the man who had gazed at me so,
through the clipped _Arbor vitæ_; and that now I had seen the same man
in the throng on the Heath, and could swear to him anywhere. At first
he was inclined to laugh, and thought I must have dreamed it; but
seeing how serious and positive I was, he naturally asked how it was I
let him go, without at least ascertaining who he was. I told him that I
had done my best; and that I believed the man knew me, for our eyes met
point-blank, until he turned his away. And then I had pushed through
the crowd to seize him, but a fat man on horseback came clearing the
course, and a rush of some hundreds of people swept us back, and when
I could get out of it, the man had disappeared. I described him and
his dress, to the best of my ability; and then Sam gave a whistle and
said—“I don’t think it can be. He can scarcely have been here without
my knowledge.”

“You recognize him? Who is he?” I asked with some excitement. “Don’t
keep it back, Sam. It is most important to me.”

“Well, the face, and the hat, and the green pearl in the scarf-pin
remind me uncommonly of Downy Bulwrag; though I do not know him very
well; and it can hardly be. He is out of England, I am told, and if he
had been here I should have met him in the ring. For he always comes to
bet, and he is a very deep file, though he knows very little of racing.
He comes to invest for old Pot sometimes, and it is the only time Pot
ever makes any money.”

“But he may have gone off, when he saw me,” I said; “he would hardly
dare to run the risk of meeting me again.”

“Wouldn’t he? It would take ten of you to drive him. Downy Bulwrag is
the coolest hand I ever came across. I give him a wide berth myself;
for there is nothing but bad luck to be made out of him. He is worse
than his mother, a thousand times; and everybody knows what she is. I
am very glad you missed him. For he would have had the best of you.”

“Would he indeed?” I exclaimed rather hotly. “I am not a milksop, Sam;
and I fear no man on earth, when I have reason to believe that he has
wronged me.”

“You are strong enough, Kit,” Sam returned, with some contempt; “we
are all aware of that, my friend. You are stronger, I dare say, than
Downy Bulwrag, although he is no chicken. But he is one of the first
boxers in England. He has made a hobby of it. He can hold his own with
the biggest prize fighters. He could double you up, before you got near
him. And it is not only that, my boy. Likely enough he would not have
touched you; for he never loses his temper they say. He would have had
you up before the Bench to-morrow. He can always put anybody in the
wrong. And then how should we have gone on to-night? No, it was a lucky
thing that you got no chance to tackle him, supposing it was Downy,
which I scarcely can believe. All the fellows are gone who could have
told me. But I dare say I shall find out in London. Now let us have
some grub, or we shall miss our train.”

Sam Henderson’s words set me pondering deeply. I had not intended to
assault that stranger, whoever he might be, but just to bring him to
a halt, and make him tell me who he was, and what he meant by coming
on the sly into my uncle’s garden, and watching me in that peculiar
manner. Now I felt pretty certain as to who he was, in spite of the
difficulties Sam had found about it. If my description tallied so
closely with that of Donovan Bulwrag, it was likely to be no one else
who had come so to spy upon me. For there was the motive at once made
plain. The man, who had robbed me of my wife, would naturally come
to see how I bore it, to learn perhaps what sort of adversary I was,
and to gloat upon my lonely misery. I felt delighted when I called to
mind that I had indulged in no sighs or soliloquy that evening, but
worked away steadily and even cheerfully, whistling every now and then
for company to myself. My deadly enemy could not say—“Poor devil, how
miserable he looks!”

And then why should I have such a bitter enemy? I had never done harm
to this Bulwrag, except by marrying a young lady upon whom he had set
his wicked heart, but who never would have had him, whatever he had
done. And again I had defied his mother, and thrown her into one of her
furious fits; but even if he had heard of that, it could not have moved
him to any great wrath. From all I had heard, he was not so very deeply
attached to his mother; and he must know, as everybody else did, how
little was enough to infuriate her.

As I thought of all these things in the train, with Sam Henderson
snoring, or rather roaring in his sleep (like a celebrated horse who
had won a race that day), the only conclusion I could come to was that
my case was more mysterious than ever; that some fiendish trick had
been played upon my wife and me; but how, and why, and by whom, was
more than my simple, half-educated, country wits could discover as
yet, or perhaps at any future time. Nevertheless I resolved to go on,
and get to the end of it, whether round or square; whether it might be
another sweet circle of happiness, or a coffin. And in this state of
mind, being lifted for the moment out of the body, by the hoisting of
the mind, I set my hands together—for it was a first-class carriage,
and there was room to do it, though it seemed to me a showy thing upon
the part of Sam, when third-class tickets would have done as well—and
I prayed to the Lord, which I had not done lately, having found it
lead to nothing, that He would interfere, and not allow everything to
be under the control of the Evil one. After that I felt better; for
faith is a fruit-tree, which requires (in a common soil) the choicest

“Here we are,” cried Sam, who could sleep by the mile, and be wide
awake at the direction-post; “what a heavy-headed chap you are! Just
look to our bags, while I see about a trap. We have five miles to
drive, and then we put up at old Cranky’s. There we have a shake-down,
and I fare to want it, as the folk in this part of the world express
it. They all know me here, and they have a black mare who can travel.”

For five miles we drove through a sleepy-looking land, with scarcely
anybody yet astir, but a multitude of birds quite wide awake; and
then we put up at a wayside inn; where Sam seemed, as usual, to be
well-known. He told me to take it easy, and he set a fine example; for
he very soon peopled the house with his sleep, while I wandered about
to see how the land lay.

“Pots is never up till twelve o’clock,” Sam explained at
breakfast-time; “so you see we may just as well keep our hay in cocks.
I say, Cranky,” he addressed the landlord, who was coming in and out,
having no maid to attend to us, “What’s-his-name been down this way
lately? Fancied we saw something of him yesterday.”

“No, sir, not a sign of him, since you was here last. They don’t seem
to hit it off together as they did. Leastways that was what my missus

“More chance of honest people coming by their due. How much does Sir
Cumberleigh owe you, Cranky? Take thy bill, and write down quickly.”

“Lor’, sir, it would take a week to make it out. And what good would
come of it when done? Sir Cumberleigh never pays nobody. No more than
his father before him.” It were vain on my part to attempt to express
the long-suffering of Mr. Cranky’s drawl.

“These are wonderful fellows,” Sam declared aloud to me while the
landlord looked at him, as if to say—“And so are you,” and then turned
to me to see if I were likewise; “they never seem to expect to get
their money from their betters, as they call them. That cock would
never fight, in our part of the world. Any lady been down at the Hall,
this summer, Cranky? I mean any one, who has never been before? You
need not be afraid of telling me, you know. I am an old friend of Sir

This question was put in such a common sort of way, that I dropped my
knife and fork, and looked furiously at Sam. For I knew what he meant;
and it appeared to me too bad.

“No, sir,” answered Cranky, leaning over him confidentially, as if he
were uncertain about speaking before me. “None but the two as come
last winter; and not so very much of them. My missus did hear as Sir
Cumberleigh were going to pull up, and to enter into holy matrimony
with a beautiful young lady from London town, as had sixty thousand
pounds of her own, and then we should all be paid on the nail in full.
And the Hall was to be made new, and I know not what. But I said it was
too good to be true, and so it seemeth.”

“Hope for ever, good Cranky. Hope can do no harm to the _Hotchpot
Arms_. But how goes the time? We are going to call upon this reformed
gentleman, as soon as he is up.”



AS we walked very slowly through the wilderness of thistles, which had
once been a fair park trimly kept, I disturbed the mind of Sam—which
was busy with abstruse calculations of all sorts of odds—by asking
rather suddenly what I was to say, and how I should conduct myself in
the presence of this man. For I felt a deep dislike to him, not only
because he had been such a plague to Kitty, but on account of his
bad character and loose ways. And my ill-will towards him had been
increased by his cowardly treatment—as it seemed to me—of the patient
people round him, and encroachment on their loyalty.

“You mustn’t ask me, my dear fellow,” answered Sam; “the thing is
out of my line altogether. You wanted to see him, and here he is. I
must leave you to the light of nature, although he is rather a dark
specimen. Perhaps he knows nothing about your trouble. But he is up to
most of Downy Bulwrag’s tricks, or at any rate knows when to suspect
him. And if he has had a row with Bulwrag, and can see his way to harm
him, he will do it. For Pots is a very spiteful fellow. You had better
appear first as my companion. I can manage not to let him catch your
name; for he is rather hard of hearing, though he won’t allow it. I
shall work matters round till Downy’s name comes up; and your business
will be to hold your tongue and listen, until you can strike in with
advantage. He will see me, I think, because I wrote to tell him that I
had a little money for him. There is nothing like that to fetch Pots.”

After a little reconnoitring from a window at the flank, we were
admitted by an ancient footman, who looked as if he never got his
wages, and shown into a shabby room, fusty, damp, and comfortless. Here
we waited nearly half an hour, while Henderson drummed on the floor
with his stick, and at last began to blow a horn which he found behind
a looking-glass. Then the master of the house appeared, and shook hands
with Sam, and bowed to me.

It is easy enough to introduce a stranger, so that his name shall
be still unknown; and Sir Cumberleigh, not being quick of hearing,
received my name as “Johnson.” “On the turf?” he inquired; and Sam
said, “Yes; he has been on it every day this week;” which was true
enough in one sense; and I longed to be back in a garden again, where
we grow rogues, but nothing like so many.

“Very glad to see you, very glad indeed, young sir.” This gentleman
offered his hand as he spoke; but I bowed, as if I had not seen it.
It may be a stupid old bit of priggery; but no man’s hand comes into
mine, while I am longing to smite him in the face. And I could not help
smiling at our host’s new manners, so different entirely from what
he showed in London—unless he had been vastly misdescribed to me. He
pretended now to dignity and distance, and a fine amount of grandeur;
for no other reason that I could guess, except that he was upon his
native soil, breathing the air of his ancestral vaults, and cheating
folk who let him cheat because his fathers did it.

But all this air of loftiness had no effect on Sam; who had rubbed
whiskers many times even with a Duke, when their minds were moving on a
good thing together.

“Got a bit of rhino for you, Pots,” he said, and I thought it
showed little good taste on his part, for Sam’s ancestors had been
stable-boys, and I have always been a good Conservative; “not so much
as I could wish; but every little is a help. And everybody says that
you are awfully hard up. Hope it isn’t true; but we must have seen you
at the July, if you had been at all flush.”

“I have not been very fortunate of late,” replied the Baronet, still
keeping up his dignity on my account; “and my property here has been
much impaired by—by a lot of things that did not come off. I was not
at Newmarket, because I intend to have nothing more to do with racing
matters; which I must leave to people who are sharper than myself, and
have different views of integrity. But anything really due to me—”

“Perhaps I had better not say any more about it;” Henderson’s black
eyes were twinkling with contempt. “I had no right properly to receive
the money; and if I had thought twice about it, I should have refused,
for I had no commission from you to collect it; but Georgie Roberts
knew that I was coming to see you, and knowing me so well, he took
my receipt on your behalf, because he was anxious to square up. I’ll
just return it to him, and he can send you a cheque. I heard a thing
afterwards that put me in the wrong. Bulwrag is the proper chap to act
for you. And he seems to have been there after all, but he cannot have
turned up, till Friday. I’ll send back these notes, and his receipt to
Georgie.” Sam put away his pocket-book, and looked contented; but Sir
Cumberleigh did not see it so.

“No, Sam, no! Business is business. I will write you a receipt. How
much did you say it was? Let me see. I forget these trifles. Somewhere
about eighty-five, if I remember.”

“Forty-five,” said Sam; and I was struck with the amount, because it
was the very sum that had so grieved me. “He had forty against you upon
the Levant. Downy managed that for you.”

“Downy Bulwrag never did me any good, and he never will;” said the
Baronet sternly, yet looking round, as if afraid of echoes. “He is
always getting me into some vile scrape.”

“For instance, about the young lady at Hounslow. Did he carry on any
more with that affair?”

Sam put this question in the most off-handed manner, just as if he had
said—“Any news to-day?” But being unused to any mystery on shuffling,
I looked for the answer with extreme anxiety, and Sir Cumberleigh
observed it, and was put upon his guard.

“How can I tell? I know nothing of his doings;” he answered, with his
eyes on me, while speaking to my friend. “Downy is too deep for me; he
is always up to something. Mr. Johnson, do you know him? You almost
look as if you did.”

“No, I have never had that honour,” I answered as calmly as I could;
“I live in the country, and have little to do with London, except when
I am there on business.”

“Very well then, I may tell you, Henderson,” our host continued, as he
put aside the notes, after counting them, and giving his receipt; “that
Master Downy has not behaved of late in a very friendly manner towards
myself. He has not the high principle, I am afraid, which has always
governed my conduct, at least in all matters of friendship and money.
My rule is rather to wrong myself, than any other living being. We have
held these estates for some centuries, Mr. Johnson; and no Hotchpot has
ever yet sullied the name. Fortune has continually been against us; but
we have borne ourselves bravely, and won universal esteem, and even
affection. I never praise myself; but when my time is over, the same
thing will always be said of me.”

He spoke with such firm conviction that I was impressed with his words,
and began to feel sure that report must have wronged him; until I
thought of Kitty, who was no harsh judge of character.

“Hear, hear!” cried Sam; “you have done it well, Pots. After that, you
can scarcely do less than invite us to drink your good health in a
bottle of champagne.”

“That I will, with pleasure. Only you must excuse me, while I see to
it myself. The Hotchpots are down in the world, Mr. Johnson, because
we could never curry favour. We cannot keep our butlers and our
coach-and-four, and our deer-park, as we used to do. Instead of that, I
keep the key of my own cellar. But I feel no shame in that. The shame
lies rather—”

“Look sharp, old chap; I am as dry as a herring.” Sam was always
rough and rude in his discourse; and Sir Cumberleigh set off, with a
significant glance at me.

“He has taken a liking to you, the old rogue,” Henderson informed me,
when the door was shut; “because he believes that you suck all his
brag in, like a child. You stick to that; it suits you well, for your
face is no end of innocent. An old stupe like that can be buttered up
to anything, if it is laid on by the right card. You don’t suck up to
him, you see; but you let him suck up to himself. We shall draw him of
everything he knows, and what matters more, everything he suspects.
Only you leave the whip-hand to me; green you are, and green you will
be to the last.”

“You are altogether out in that,” I said, though I knew it was hopeless
to reason with him; “you fellows, who see such a lot of fast life, are
none the more sagacious for it. You doubt what everybody says, unless
you can find a bad motive for it. And you generally go wrong in the
end, because you can only see black all round. But if this is a black
sheep, you take the shearing of him. Only I hate to go under a wrong

These words of mine proved that I was not a fool, at least to my own
satisfaction. Sam stared at me, as much as to say—“There is more in
you, than I thought there was;” but I did not care to press the point;
for he might take a huff, and say, “Do it yourself, then.” Only I
resolved to listen carefully, and see if there was anything to be
learned. And before he could answer, our host returned, with a bottle
of champagne under each arm, and the old retainer following with
glasses and a corkscrew having a blade attached to it. And I thought
that he could not be bad altogether, but must at least have intervals.

“Henderson, will you oblige me by being our—what’s his name? Diomede,
or something. I have a touch of rheumatism in one wrist. No corkscrew
wanted, if the cork is cork, and not wood, as a great many of them are.
But he understands it. Well done, Sam! Fill for Mr. Johnson first. Ah,
this is the right sort. Now we know what we are up to. Mr. Johnson,
your good health, and the same to you, Sam!”

“Sir Cumberleigh, here’s confusion to your enemies,” cried Sam,
standing up to give force to it; “and especially to one whom I could
name. Ah, he has led you a pretty dance, and feathered his own nest out
of it. However, we won’t say any more about him. A downy fellow can’t
help being downy. Every man for his own hand, in this little world.”

“Sam, you know more than you have said. You go about more than I do
now. Do you mean to say, that he has let me in purposely?”

“No, I never could believe that he would do it. It looks rather queer,
but it must be straight enough. No doubt everything can be explained.
You remember about _Flying Goose_ at least?”

They began to talk a quantity of racing stuff, which was nothing but
jargon to me; till Sir Cumberleigh rose from his chair, and struck the
table, glaring with his eyes, and turning purple in the face.

“Then his name is not Bulwrag, but blackguard;” he exclaimed, turning
round to me, to attest it. “And as soon as we meet, I shall tell him
so.” Then he swore a round of oaths, which were of no effect, but to
hurt himself, and turn up the corners of the pity we were spreading for
him. What had he lost? Money only. I had lost more. I held my tongue.

“You must not be too hard upon him;” Sam began to soften, to make him
harder. “Every man for his own hand. Fair play, Pots; you would do it

“Not for any one who trusted me. That makes all the difference. He
thinks he can do what he likes with me. He shall find the difference. I
know a trick or two of his that would send him to the Devil, if I let

“Well, we won’t talk about any secrets now;” said Sam as cool as a
cucumber, while I was like a red-hot iron; “his private affairs are no
concern of ours; and we don’t want to hear of them. Johnson is a very
steady-going chap, with a wife and six kids. We won’t corrupt him,

“Not much fear of that, if he is on the turf,” Sir Cumberleigh replied,
with a wink at me; “see a good bit of the world there, don’t you, Mr.

I nodded my head, and turned away; for I never was much of an actor,
and now I could not trust my voice for words. But Sir Cumberleigh was
as full of his own wrongs, as I was of mine in a different way.

“I know a thing or two,” he went on, becoming more determined, as we
feigned to check him, “that would stop his little tricks for a long
time to come. He would have to be off to the Continent again, if I were
to treat him as he deserves.”

“Then don’t do it, Pots. Forgive and forget; that’s the proper tip
nowadays. Who doesn’t try to let you in? It is no concern of mine—but
let us talk of something else. I dare say he is a good fellow, after

“Is he?” cried Sir Cumberleigh, working himself up; “I may have done
a thing or two, in my time. But I never harmed man or woman, out of
pure spite. Every man must consider his own interest, and try to hurt
no one, when it does not help himself. That is my idea of the rule of
life. But it is not Master Downy’s, I can tell you that.”

“Never mind, old fellow. Let us drink his good health;” Sam lifted his
glass, but our host set down his. “Whenever I hear a poor fellow run
down, I begin to think of all that is good in him. And I don’t believe
Downy would hurt any one, unless he was obliged to do it on his own
account. He made a pot of money, and he dropped a bit of yours. But
you must not score against him for a little thing like that.”

“It is useless to talk to you, Henderson. You have not been hit, and
you may whistle over it. But I’ll just ask Mr. Johnson what he thinks,
for I can see that he is a man of proper feeling. Now what should you
say, Mr. Johnson, of a fellow, who wanted to marry a girl who did not
like him, because he thought she had a lot of money; and then when she
married a very quiet man, who took her without a halfpenny, could not
let them be happy with one another, but got up some infernal scheme to
separate them?”

“I should say he was a scoundrel too bad to be hanged;” I answered with
warmth unaffected; and I was going to say more, but Sam checked me with
a glance.

“Oh come, no fellow would ever do such a thing as that;” he spoke with
contemptuous disbelief. “Any man must be a fool, who would get into
such a scrape for nothing.”

“Then Downy Bulwrag is a fool, as well as what you called him, Mr.
Johnson. I could tell you the story, if I chose; or at least I could
tell you a part of it. But it would not interest you; and it is a long
in and out of rascality. Well, I won’t say any more about it; and I
don’t know how he managed it. But he will have a score to settle about
that, some day.”

“That he will, and a bitter one;” I began, with hands clenched, and
heart throbbing; but Sam kicked me under the table, and whispered,
while Sir Cumberleigh was reaching for the other bottle—

“Don’t be such a gone idiot. Leave it to me—can’t you?”

“I should have thought Downy was too sharp for that;” Sam stroked his
chin, and looked sceptical. “Of course, I don’t know him as you do,
Pots. But I should have thought he was about the last man you could
find to risk his hide for mere larkiness.”

“Well, I don’t know that he risked very much. The young man is in the
agricultural line, and they are fair game for any one, and have been
so for the last twenty years. You may stamp on those fellows, and they
rather like it. By George, if we treated the mill-owners so, they would
have marched upon London long ago. But a fellow with no kick in him
must expect to get plenty of it from his neighbours.”

These were my sentiments to a hair, coming straight to me from Uncle
Corny; and at any other time I should have struck in boldly, with
larger capacity of speech than thought. But to him who has no home to
defend, politics are as a tinkling cymbal, instead of a loaded cannon.

“What part of the world was it in?” Sam Henderson asked, that the
subject might not slip away; “that sort of thing would never do in our
part of the world; though we call ourselves pretty rural still.”

“Well, I don’t know exactly where it was. And we had better not say
any more about it.” Sir Cumberleigh became suspicious at the first
sign of direct inquiry. “After all, I dare say there was no harm done.
And perhaps the young fellow was glad to be quit of all, before she
had time to run up any bills. Although she was a devilish nice girl, I
believe. But who could want more than three weeks of any woman? Except
for the sake of her tin, of course. Mr. Johnson, you agree with me
about that, I can see.”

“Nothing of the sort,” I answered sternly, forgetting how I wrecked
my purpose by my indignation; “a good wife is the greatest blessing
any man can have. And the man who robs him of her is no man, but is a

“You had better set Johnson after your friend Downy;” Sam Henderson
struck in, as Sir Cumberleigh stared at me. “You see how a Benedict
regards the subject. And I shall have to be of his opinion soon. Next
week I shall lead to the Hymeneal halter, who do you think?—give you
three guesses, and lay a fiver you don’t hit it.”

“Done with you!” cried our host, for I believe he knew. “Three chances,
Mr. Johnson, you heard what he said. No. 1, Violet Hunter, such a
stunning girl.”

“Wrong. Try again. No Vi Hunter for me. Wouldn’t have her, if she was
dipped in diamonds.”

“Well then, it must be Gerty Triggs, a fine young woman, and five
thousand pounds.”

“Wrong again. Only one go more. Have your flimsy ready.”

“Oh, I say, it can’t be Sally Chalker. That would be too much luck for
a chap like you.”

“It is Sally Chalker, and no mistake. Though I’ll trouble you to call
her Miss Chalker, Pots, until she is Mrs. Henderson. And I’d like to
see any fellow come between us.”

“Hand over,” said Sir Cumberleigh; “well, Sam, you are in luck. What
a lot of things you will put us up to then! Here’s to your happiness!
Well, this is good news indeed. Stop to dinner; we can have it early.”

But Sam declined the honour; and we soon set forth for home, as nothing
more could be extracted from our host, concerning the matter which had
brought us there. And Sam, who understood him pretty thoroughly, felt
sure that he had already told us all he knew, and perhaps even more in
the way of mere suspicion.



ONCE I met a man who was a mighty swimmer, spending half his waking
time in the water, and even sleeping there sometimes, according to his
own account; though I found it rather hard to believe that altogether.
But one thing he told me, which I do believe, because it is not so far
out of the way, and the same thing might have happened to myself almost.

He had made a wager to swim across one of those inlets, or arms of the
sea, which may be found upon our western coast, where the tide runs in
with great force and speed, over a vast expanse of sands.

The distance from headland to headland was less than he had often
been able to traverse; but, being a stranger on that coast, he had
not reckoned, as he should have done, upon the power and strong swirl
of the tide. By these he was soon so swung about, and almost carried
under, that the sand-hills, where the people stood to watch him, stood
still themselves, instead of slowly gliding by. And the yellow current
flaked with white, across which he was striving, seemed to be the only
thing that moved.

He began to doubt about his destination, whether in this world or
the next; for the cup of his hands, as he fetched them back, and the
concave impulse of his feet as he spread his toes behind him, seemed to
tell nothing upon the vast body of water he was involved in; there was
no slide of surface along his shoulder-blades, and his chin rose and
fell at each labouring stroke, without budging an inch from the dip or
the rise. He began to feel that he was beaten, and a quiet resignation
sank into the stoutness of his heart, such as a brave man feels at
death. And he never would have lived to tell the tale, except for a
big voice from the shore, the voice of the very man who had the money
hanging on it.

“Put your feet down, Tom,” he cried; “for God’s sake put your feet

The vanquished swimmer put his feet down, though he thought it was his
death to do it; and there he felt firm sand, and stood, with the tide
which had threatened to engulf him, rippling round his panting breast,
and lapping his poor weary arms. There happened to be a spit of sand
there, far away from shore and rock, and known to the boatmen only.
There he stood, and renewed his strength, with cheers of encouragement
from the shore; and then, as the rush of the tide was slackening, after
filling the depths inshore, he threw his chest forward upon the water,
and fought his way safely to the landing-place.

“But I would not take the money,” he said; “if I had taken that man’s
money, I should have deserved to be drowned next time.”

This appeared to me to be a noble tale, showing goodness on both sides,
which is the true nobility. And it came to my memory now, because it
seemed to apply to my present state. I had battled long with unknown
waters, and against a tide too strong for me; and now, though still far
away from land, I had obtained firm footing. By what cross purpose and
crooked inrush, my power and pride had been washed away, was a question
still as dark as ever; but now I could rest on the firm conviction,
which had been only faith before, that my Kitty still was true to me,
though beguiled by some low stratagem. And I knew pretty surely who had
done it, though it might be very hard to prove.

“Don’t lose a day,” said Uncle Corny, when I told him all we had done
and heard; “never mind me, or the garden. You can make up for all
that by-and-by; and you have left your part in first-rate order. That
scoundrel follows in his mother’s track; but he is ten times worse
than she is, because he keeps his temper. You must try to do the same,
my lad. It would never do to have a row with him, and to take him by
the throat, as he deserves. There is nothing you can prove at present.
And the moment he knows that you suspect him, he will double all his
wiles and dodges. He might even make away with your poor wife. He would
rather do that, than let you regain her, and convict him of his tricks.”

“Bad as he is, he could never do that. I cannot believe that any person
living, who knows what Kitty is, could raise his hand against her. But
the wonder is, where can he have put her? Gentle as she is, she is not
a fool; and she would never submit to be restrained by force. And all
that sort of thing is quite out of date now, at any rate in England.”

“So people suppose; but stranger things are done, even in this country
still. He may even have got her in a lunatic asylum, after driving
her out of her senses first. Or more likely still, on the Continent
somewhere. Why, they do worse things than that in Spain, and in Italy,
too, from what I have heard. And as for Turkey—why, bless my heart,
they keep the women in sacks and feed them, till they are fat enough
for the Sultan. And you heard that he has gone abroad. Mrs. Wilcox said
so. That is what he has done with her; you may depend upon it.”

“But she would not have travelled with him, uncle. He would not have
dared to take her into any public place. But don’t talk about it; it
drives me wild. I see nothing to do, but to force him to confess, to
get him away somewhere by himself, and hold a pistol to his head. A
blackguard is always a coward, you know.”

“Nine out of ten are, but the tenth is not,” my uncle replied
sententiously; “no sort of violence will serve our turn. We must try
to be crafty as he is. The only plan I can see is to have him watched,
followed everywhere without his knowledge, and not put upon his guard
by a syllable from us. We had no reason to do that till now; but now we
have, for I feel pretty sure that old Hotchpot was right. You ought to
have got more out of him.”

“It was not to be done. We tried everything. And I believe he knows no
more than this—that before they quarrelled, the younger villain made a
boast of it that he would have his revenge, but never let out what his
plan was. And when Hotchpot heard that it had been done, he naturally
concluded who had done it. When we compared notes, Sam and I agreed
that in all probability there is nothing more than that.”

“It is very unlucky for us,” said my uncle, “that Henderson is going
to be married so soon. We cannot expect him to help us any more, for
a long time to come; and he has twice the head that you have. I don’t
mean to say for useful work, for there you would beat him hollow, but
for plotting, and scheming, and all sorts of dirty tricks. He has been
brought up to those things from the cradle, and he can tell a lie
splendidly, which you cannot. You are much too simple and truthful,
Kit, just as I am, for dealing with rogues and knaves. And he knows a
lot more of the bad world than we do. He is hand in glove also with a
host of swells, such as you and I never spoke to. Why, I never shook
hands with a lord in my life, although I should do it like a man—if
he offered, mind, for I should wait for that. And you are in the same

“Not a bit of it. I shook hands with two at Newmarket, and they seemed
to think very well of me. But that reminds me that I met the very man
for our job, if he would undertake it. And I believe he would, if we
paid him well.”

“For spying upon Bulwrag, you mean, Kit. I can’t bear the idea of
spying, even on that fellow. But I fear we must make up our minds to
it, just as the police watch a murderer. And as for the cost of it,
I would go half, and I am sure your Aunt Parslow would pay the other
half. But what makes you think that he would suit? A very sharp fellow
is wanted, mind. Not a bit like Selsey Bill.”

“If it must be done, he is the very man. But you shall not pay a
farthing, Uncle Corny; you have plenty to do with your money. At any
rate I will not ask you, until I have spent all I have for the purpose.
Your advice is quite enough for you to give, and it is worth more than
money. See what I should have done without you now! I had made up my
mind to pursue that fellow, and seize him, and shake the truth out of
him. But I should only have shaken out a heap of lies, and probably got
locked up for my trouble. But I see that your plan is the only wise

“You are a sensible young fellow, Kit, when you have good advisers.
But who is this man of craft you were speaking of, and how has he got
experience for a job like this?”

“He has been brought up to every kind of nasty work; and the nastier it
is, the more he likes it. He is a spy on horses, to watch them in their
trials, and sneak into their boxes, and learn everything they think of.
It seems to be a regular profession, where they keep racehorses; and
Sam knows all about this man. They call them Touts, or Ditch-frogs, or
Sky-blinkers, or half-a-dozen other names; but they get well paid, and
they don’t care. His name, or nick-name, is Tony Tonks, which he takes
from some story-book, I believe. He is a very queer sort of fellow; if
you saw him once, you would know him always; not a bit like any of our
folk down here. Sam says he could canter round any of his chaps, and he
would try to afford him, if he did crooked work; but Tony is a costly

“Never mind the cost. Your aunt shall pay; she has nothing to do with
all her cash, except to blow out a lot of dogs, like footballs. But is
this Tony to be trusted? He might be a Jack of both sides.”

“That is just what he isn’t. And that is how he gets double the wages
of any other Tout. He puts his whole heart into anything he takes up;
and yet he is cool as a weazle. He makes a point of honour of winning,
Sam told me; and he would rather pay money out of his own pocket, than
be beaten, whenever he takes up a job. And he is very small; he can
slip in and out, while people say—‘Oh, what boy was that?’ But I doubt
whether he would take up this. He would have made a wonderful jockey,
I was told; and he rides as well as the best of them. But he loses
his head, when he is put upon a horse, or he might be now making ten
thousand a year. Nobody can explain such things.”

“Nobody can explain anything;” my uncle replied with his usual wisdom;
“look at me. I have been in a garden all my life, and I have kept
my eyes open, and I am no fool. But if you ask what canker is in an
apple-tree or pear, or blister in a peach, or silver-leaf, or shanking
in grapes, or sudden death in a Moorpark, or fifty other things that we
meet with every day, all I can say is—‘Go and ask the men of science,
and if two of them tell you the same thing, believe it.’ No, my lad, we
know nothing yet, though we find bigger words than used to serve the
turn. Have you told young Henderson, that you would like to try this
fellow, Tony Tonks?”

“No, I never thought of it, until just now, when you suggested that the
villain should be watched, to find out where he goes, and all his dirty
doings. It is fair play with such a deadly sneak. But for all that, I
hate the thought of it.”

“We must meet the devil with his own weapons. Sam is going to be
married at Ludred, I suppose.”

“Yes, next Thursday. And I have promised to be there. Although it will
be a bad time for me.”

“Never mind, Kit. You shall have your time again. As I have told you
more than once. I am an old man now, and have seen a lot of wickedness.
But I never knew it triumph in the end. Go up at once to Halliford, and
get your friend to write to this fellow by the afternoon post. We might
have him here to-morrow night, and settle matters with him, while we
have Henderson to help us.”

I was lucky enough to find Henderson at home, and he entered into our
plan with zeal; for he had his own grudge with Bulwrag. But he told me
that we must be prepared to part with a heap of money, if we began it;
and he could not tell how long it might last. I answered that we had a
good bank to draw on, and that I should be able to repay it in the end
out of my own little property, which I should insist upon doing.

“Tony will want five pounds a week, and all expenses covered; and you
may put that probably at five pounds more.” Sam looked as if he thought
I could not afford it. “And then if he does any good, he will expect a
handsome tip. And you must let him have his own head. He is the best
man in England for the job, if he will take it. And perhaps he will.
There is nothing on now in his line of business much, till the Leger
comes on. Tony will do a good deal for me. I shall put it as a personal
favour, you know. But we won’t tell him what it is, until he comes to

Busy as he was with his own affairs, Henderson wrote to the great
horse-watcher, and receiving reply by telegraph, met him at Feltham the
following afternoon; and after showing him all over his own places,
brought him to supper with us at my uncle’s cottage at nine o’clock,
as had been arranged in the morning. And it was as good as a play—as
we express it—and better than most of the French plays now in vogue,
to see my solid uncle, with his English contempt for a spy, and strong
habit of speaking his mind, yet doing his utmost to be hospitable, and
checking himself in his blunt deliveries, and catching up any words
that might be too honest for the convenience of his visitor. He told me
afterwards that he felt like a rogue, and was afraid of sitting square
to his own table.

The visitor, however, did not in the least appreciate these exertions,
or even perceive their existence. He was perfectly contented with his
own moral state, and although he said little, I could almost have
believed that he regarded my good uncle with as much superiority, as
was felt—but not shown—towards himself. And his principal ambition was
to take in a good supper.

Being concerned more than all the rest in his qualities, I observed him
closely, and became disappointed when he said nothing of any particular
astuteness. But perhaps, like most men who have to work their brains
hard, he allowed them a holiday when off duty, and cared very little
what was thought of them then, if they came up to the scratch at
signal. And although he said little, what he said was to the point,
and he did not expend great ability in proving, as most men do, that
two and two make four.

His outer man was of such puny build, that when he sat by my uncle’s
elbow, it seemed as if he might have jumped into the big pocket,
wherein the fruit-grower was wont to carry a hammer, a stick of string,
a twist of bast, a spectacle-case full of wall-nails, a peach-knife,
a pair of clips, a little copper wire, and a few other things to suit
the season, according to its latest needs. Tony Tonks glanced every now
and then with great curiosity at my uncle, and at this pocket which was
hanging with its weight under the arm of a curved Windsor chair; as a
fisherman likes to see his bag hang down, but only once in his lifetime
has that pleasure.

But though Tony Tonks might go (more readily than the fish who
won’t come at all) into that pocket, Nature had provided him with
compensation for his want of magnitude. There never lived a very small
man yet, who was not in his own opinion big. Great qualities combine in
him, of mind and soul, and even of the body for the sake of paradox;
so that no one knows what he can amount to, but himself. And as the
looking-glass presents us with ourselves set wrong; so the mirror of
the man who weighs but half the proper weight, may exalt him to the
ceiling, if he slopes it to his mind.

Tony spoke little, but he spoke with weight, and expected to be
followed closely, when he gave us anything. And it became pleasant
to behold my uncle gradually forming a great opinion of him, because
he was not offered much to build it on. Sam Henderson nodded very
knowingly to me, and I returned it with a wink behind my Uncle Corny’s
head, when the pipes were put upon the table, and the grower took the
clean one he intended for himself, and gave it (with a grunt at his own
generosity) to Tonks.

“Now we all know where we are,” began my uncle, as if a puffing pipe
had been the cloudy pillar; “the best thing, as I have always found in
life, is for people to know what they are at, before they do it.”

Tony Tonks nodded, and my uncle was well pleased, both to have the
discourse to himself, and to perceive that the visitor smoked slowly,
and could dwell upon good things.

“You give us your experience and skill, for the period of one month at
least if needful, for the sum of five pounds a week payable in advance,
as well as travelling expenses, if required, and lodgings. You report
to us by post, when there is anything to tell, and you come down at
the end of every week, to let us know how you get on, and to draw your
money for the next week. And you attend to nothing else, but the job
you are engaged on.”

“Nothing else. Never take two things in hand at once.”

“And the business you undertake for us is to find out everything that
can be found about the doings of Donovan Bulwrag. Where he goes, who
his companions are, what messages he receives or sends, how he employs
his time, what he is up to, everything about him that is of interest to
us. It seems a nasty, shabby thing, but he has brought it on himself.
We can’t bear doing it; but it must be done.”

“Nothing shabby in it,” Tonks exclaimed with spirit, and a quick flash
in his small gray eyes; “trickey people must be tricked.”

“A man who has wronged another man,” said my uncle, putting it on a
larger footing, “as that low scoundrel has wronged us, has put himself
outside of all honour. You know the man very well by sight, I believe.”

“And by more than sight;” answered Tony, in a voice that made us look
at him. But as he offered no explanation, we did not ask him what he
meant, but concluded that he had his own bone to pick with this crafty



WE arranged that our watchman—as my uncle called him, thinking it much
more respectable than spy—should hire a room from our friend Mrs.
Wilcox, who could help him in many ways. For she knew all the habits of
the house of Bulwrag, and had useful friends in the kitchen there, and
could introduce Tonks to a distant view of the adversary’s mother and

All this being settled, and everybody else in good spirits about it, I
fell suddenly into deep dejection, not on account of Sam Henderson’s
good luck, for that I rejoiced in and would not think of, but simply
from dwelling on my own hard fate, and the sympathy aroused by it among
all who knew me. For as time went on, I was pitied more and more, and
our neighbours one and all made up their minds, that there never had
been a more unlucky fellow. And especially the women looked at me in
such a way, that when I could avoid them without rudeness, it seemed to
be a comfort to have business round the corner.

This began to tell upon me more and more; for as no man can see all the
world for himself, but must take his view of it from other people’s
eyes; so even in his own affairs he finds their colour affected by the
light or shade that others cast upon them. And labour as I might to
think that every one was wrong, and ought to be compelled to keep his
mind to his own business, yet when I had made all this most certain to
myself, a frosty fog and gloom of doubt would settle on my spirits,
and wrap me in a world of wonder having no straight road in it. And
what with one state of mind and another, sometimes the pangs of memory,
and sometimes the stings of fury, and worst of all the heavy ache of
listlessness and loneliness, upon the whole it seemed less harm to be
out of life than in it.

How it might have ended I know not, if it had not been for something
which I took to be an accident, and of no importance to me more than
any other meeting. One evening after sunset, as the days were drawing
in, though the summer was still in its power and beauty, I was taking
my usual lonely walk in “Love Lane,” as the young people called it.
There had not been a night, whether fine or wet, from the time of my
loss to this moment, when I had failed of this lonely walk, unless I
was far from Sunbury. It was some little comfort to end the day in
pacing to and fro where last, so far at least as knowledge went, my
Kitty’s footsteps must have been.

And now, when the sunset tint was gone, and the sky could be looked
into like clear glass, and in the tranquillity of summer night the
flutter of a leaf might almost seem to be caused by the twinkle of a
star, I, the only unquiet creature—according to the laws of man—was
treading the same restless round, and thinking the same endless
thoughts, as when the storm of evil fortune had been fresh upon
me. Wrapt in my own cares alone, and breathing only for myself—for
absorbing love in small men is but selfishness by deputy, and I in all
but outward form have been a small man always—here I plodded without
heed of grandeur, goodness, or the will of God.

But things are strangely brought about; and any one not remembering
this might laugh to hear how I was enlarged, and for the moment more
ennobled than by all the stars of heaven, through the sight of a white
cotton handkerchief. A man climbed over a gate into the lane, stiffly
raising one leg first, and then after a little pause the other, as if
his active days were gone. And probably I should not have seen him, for
all his clothes were black, unless he carried a white handkerchief.
This was conspicuous in the dark of the overhanging foliage; and it
seemed to be doubled up by the corners, and bulging with some bulk

“What can he have got in that?” thought I, and hastened my steps to
see, although it was no concern by rights of mine.

“Good evening, Mr. Kit—excuse me, Mr. Orchardson I mean.” This was said
in a kind and gentle voice; and I took off my hat, for I saw that it
was our parson, the Rev. Peter Golightly, not our vicar, who was absent
for the summer, but the curate in charge of our parish.

“What a calm and beautiful night!” he resumed; “it takes one out of
one’s self almost. It makes our sorrows seem so small.”

He might have talked like this for an hour, without any effect of that
sort on me; if he had not finished with a heavy sigh, in spite of all
the solace of the scene. Then I knew that he referred to his own grief,
which was a dark and bitter one. He had lost his wife, just before he
came to us; and now it was said that his only child, a graceful girl of
about fifteen, was pining away with some mysterious illness, and would
take no food. And he, an old man of threescore and five, of feeble
frame and requiring care, must finish his earthly course alone, poor,
and forlorn, and with none to love him.

“I hope Miss Bessy is a little better,” I said very softly; for I felt
rebuked in my health and strength, by a grief like this.

“No, I fear not. She fancies nothing. As I came back from visiting
poor Nanny Page, I saw some fine mushrooms in the footpath field, and
it struck me that possibly my child would like them; though they are
not very nourishing or wholesome food. But if we could get her to
eat anything—and I have a special style of cooking them. But it was
nearly dark when I gathered them, and I scarcely know the true from the
poisonous. I was going to ask Dr. Sippets, but I fear he would forbid
them altogether. You could do me a great favour, if you would. Just to
look these over for me.”

This I undertook with the greatest pleasure, and asked him to come
to my cottage for the purpose, where we could procure a light. And I
was pleased that he did not in any way attempt to “talk goody,” as our
people call it, nor even refer to my lonely condition; though I knew
by the softness of his manner that it was present to his mind. The
reverend gentleman had collected his booty in too Catholic a spirit,
mingling with the true Agaric some very fine “horse-mushrooms,” and
even one or two poisonous toadstools. Having packed all the good ones
in a tidy punnet, which looked more enticing than his handkerchief, I
carried them for him to his own door, and obtained leave to call on the
morrow, and ask whether the young lady had been tempted.

My Uncle Corny was one of that vast majority of good Britons, which can
never forbear the most obvious joke, even when it is least attractive.
The most fastidious people in the world could scarcely call him
“vulgar,”—which used to be a favourite word with them—because he could
let them call him what they liked, and be none the worse for it. They
might just as well blame a dog for loving liver, or a cat for believing
that heaven is milk, as fall foul of my Uncle Corny, because he ate
the onions of very common jokes. He liked to make a laugh; and when he
failed, he perceived that the fault was upon the other side.

“I thought of a capital thing,” he told me, “when I was half awake last
night, for I never sleep now as I used to do. If you go on like this,
you’ll have to answer to the parish for it. What right have you to
change our parson’s name?”

I saw by the wag of his nose that he was inditing of some cumbrous
joke; and I let him take his time about it.

“How slow you are! Can’t you see, Kit, his proper name is Golightly;
and you are making him go heavily. Well, never mind. I can’t expect you
to see anything just now. I suppose you never mean to laugh again.”

“Certainly not at such stuff as that. What am I doing to disturb him?”

“Why, you are getting into talks together, and heavy proceedings about
probations, and trials, and furnaces of affliction, and all that sort
of stuff, as I call it; instead of coming to have your pipe with me.”

“There has not been a word of the sort;” I answered, wondering how he
could be so small. “Mr. Golightly leaves all that for the Methodists.
He is a churchman. And not only that, but he is a man of true courage,
and real faith in God. If he could only give me a hundredth part of
what he has, how different I should be! And he never talks about it,
but I know that it is in him. Without a single word, he has made me
thoroughly ashamed of the way I go on. Look at him! A poor old man,
who can scarcely climb a gate, or lift a chair, and who sees his one
delight in this world pining and waning to the grave before him. Yet
does he ever moan and groan, and turn his back on his fellow-creatures?
Not he. He sets his face to work, with a smile that may be sad, but
is at any rate a pleasant one; and he gives all his time to help poor
people, who are not half so poor as he is. I call him a man; and I call
myself a cur.”

“Come, come; that’s all nonsense, Kit. I am sure you have borne your
trouble well; though you have been crusty now and then. And you can’t
say that I have not made allowance wonderfully for you. And here you
are ready to throw me over; because this man, whose duty it is, and who
is paid for doing it, sets a finer example than I do! I don’t call that
a Christian thing. Let him come and grow fruit, and have to sell it,
and if he keeps his temper then, and pays all his hands on a Saturday
night, and sets a better example than I do—”

I burst out laughing. It was very rude; for my uncle was much in
earnest. But I could not help it; and after staring at me, with a
vacant countenance, he gave three great puffs of tobacco and smiled as
if he was sorry for me.

“Well, take him another bunch of grapes,” he said with true
magnanimity; “I am glad that the poor maid enjoys them. And they are
come down now to fifteen pence.”

Thus was I taken, without deserving any such consolation, into a higher
life than my own, and a very different tone of thought. The bitterness,
and moody rancour, which had been encroaching on me, yielded to a
softer vein of interest, and sympathy in sorrows better borne than
mine. The lesson of patience was before me, told in silence and learned
with love; and it went into me all the deeper, because my pores were

But in spite of all that, I saw no way to sudden magnanimity. It is
not sensible to suppose that any man can forego his ways, and jump to
sudden exaltation, just because he comes across people of higher views
than his. Women seem to compass often these vast enlargements of the
heart; but a man is of less spongy fibre, if he is fit to marry them.
It had been admitted by Tabby Tapscott, even in her crossest moments,
that I was a “man as any woman could look up to, if she chose.” And the
very best of them must not be asked to do that to a man, who is like
themselves. And so I continued pretty stiff outside, and resolved to
have my rights, which is the only way to get them.

“Here comes Tony,” exclaimed my uncle, on the following Saturday night;
“time for him to show something for his money. If there is anything I
call unfair, it is to pay for a thing before you get it. He will prove
to his own satisfaction that he has worked it out, of course. When you
were at Ludred about Sam’s wedding, you should have fixed your aunt to
something. Your fifty pounds is nearly gone; and she never gave you
another penny. I don’t see why I should pay for it like this. And the
French stuff is in the market already. What’s the good of being an

“And what’s the good of being an Englishwoman?” I answered, for I
thought him too unjust, as he had not paid a sixpence yet. “Unless she
is allowed to dress sometimes, and be told that she is twenty years
younger than she is. Aunt Parslow looked fit to be a bridesmaid quite.
And she will come down handsomely, when she has paid her bills. She
looked at her cheque-book, and she said as much as that.”

“Then let her do it;” said my uncle shortly. “I suppose this spy-fellow
will expect his supper. Eat he can, and no mistake. The smaller a man
is, the more he holds. You had better run down to the butcher’s.”

Mr. Tonks might have heard him, but he made no sign, only coming up
quietly with his tall hat on, and taking a chair which stood opposite
to ours; for the weather being friendly, and the summer at its height,
we were sitting out of doors, beneath the old oak tree. Then he nodded
to us, put his hat upon the grass, and waited for our questions.

“Well, Tonks, what have you been up to all this time? You have sent us
no letter, so I suppose you have done little?”

Thus spoke my uncle, looking at him rather sternly. I also looked at
him very closely, and was surprised to find a certain strength of
goodness in his face, which I had not observed, when I first saw him.
His face was thin and narrow, and his cheeks drawn in, and his aquiline
nose had had a twist to one side. But the forehead was high and broad,
and the lips and chin full of vigour and strong resolution. And the
quiet gray eyes expressed both keenness and resource.

“A thing of this kind takes a lot of time,” he said; “and if you gents
are not satisfied, you had better say so. I take no man’s money, when
he thinks it thrown away.”

“Hoity, toity, man, don’t be so hot,” my uncle replied, showing much
more heat himself; “we have not said a word. We are waiting for you.”

“I have not done much. It was not to be expected. I have cleared the
ground for further work. It depends upon you, whether I go on.”

“Yes, to be sure! Go on, go on. We give you your head, and we are as
patient as Job. I suppose you have found out where that scoundrel is.”

“Yes. And I have found out something more than that. I have struck up
an acquaintance with him, and he does not know me; though he ought, for
he broke my arm last winter; though perhaps he never saw my face. But I
wore moustaches and whiskers then, and a green shade through a little
kick from a horse. I know of a gambling-club he goes to, and there I
meet him every night. I have put him up to a trick or two; and we are
to rehearse them at his rooms to-morrow night. He is very close; but I
shall gradually worm him. But I must be supplied with cash, to do it.”

“We will try to arrange about that,” said my uncle; “and of course you
can return it, and perhaps win some more. Gambling is a thing I detest
with all my heart; and no one can ever win by it, in the end. If he
did, it would do him no good. But still, it is right that the rogues
who live by it should be robbed. If you pick up a pound or two there,
all the better. I think you have done wonders, Tonks. But I suppose you
have discovered nothing about—about the lady.”

“Not a single syllable yet,” he answered, looking at me, as he caught
my expression; “but I believe I shall, if I have my time. What I have
done is a great deal better than ‘shadowing’ the man, as they call it.
I might do that for months, and be no wiser. But I am obliged to be
very careful. So many people know me. I can never go near him where the
racing people are. And I have had one very narrow shave already. But
there is another thing you may be glad to know. Bulwrag is beginning to
make up to a rich lady. He is not sweet upon her; but it seems that he
must do it.”

“The thief!” exclaimed my uncle; “we must never allow that. The scamp
would break her heart. I am determined to prevent it. I shall let her
know my opinion of him. I know all the villainous lot too well. Don’t
be excited, Tonks. I can’t stand that. Give me her name and address;
and I will go with the van myself, if necessary. I should think myself
a party to it, if I did not stop it. She will soon see what I am.”

“I was going to tell you, but now I had better not,” Tony Tonks
answered with a sly dry smile; “what good could you do, Mr. Orchardson?
The lady would only laugh at you, even if she deigned to see you.”

“Nobody ever laughs at me. And as for deigning to see me,—why, the
Queen herself would do it, the way I should put it.”

“Well, you have a good opinion of yourself. But you must keep quiet in
this matter, unless you want to spoil my little game. The lady is the
Lady Clara Voucher, daughter of the Earl of Clerinhouse, a very great
heiress, and not bad looking. What more he can want is a puzzle to me.
But it goes against the grain with him.”

“He shall never have her; he may take his oath of that,” said my uncle,
bringing down his hand upon his knee, as if he were the father of the

“Well, this is a curious affair,” thought I; “how can he be taking to
anybody else, after having cast his eyes on Kitty?”



ALL these things compelled me to think about them, because they were
so different from what might have been expected. When first I lost my
wife, and knew that I had been robbed of her, I made up my mind for
savage work, and nothing could be too wild for me. The greatest wrong
that man can do to man had been done to me; for a stab to the bodily
heart is better than the destruction of faith and love. But the care
for my dear wife’s good name, (which would have been blasted, if ever
it got abroad that she had eloped with the money), as well as many
other tender thoughts, had kept me quiet, and conduced to stop me from
any acts of violence. And this instinct of true love proved quite
right; as all will confess who care to know the end of it.

Straitened as I was with my own cares, and sometimes buried in them, I
could not help trying to lift if it were but the corner of the burden
imposed by Heaven upon a man a thousandfold better and more noble. The
only excuse I could make to myself, for the different way in which he
bore his grief, was that he was bound to do it as a clergyman, and
being so old, must be getting used to it. But I knew in my heart that
this was paltry stuff; and that the true reason of the difference was,
that he was a large man with faith in God; while I was a little one
relying upon self. There was no way before me to cure that, for no man
can set up his ladder on a cloud; still it did me good to know that he
had found staple support, and was steadfast upon heaven.

Mr. Golightly was not only a Christian, but a gentleman. Far as I was
below his rank in life, he never let me feel the difference, either by
word, or turn of manner, or even by tone of silence. He never inquired
into my affairs, though no indifference prevented it; and nothing was
further from his mind than the thought that he was doing good to me.
Being of a nature which requires something to love, I loved this man,
and never could see anything to laugh at in him, as my Uncle Cornelius
made believe to do.

I became restless if any day went by without my seeing him, and I
could not sleep on my two chairs, however tired I might be, without
the remembrance of his—“Good-night, God bless you, Kit”—which he
always gave me, in a gentle voice, and with a look which was itself
a blessing. And now I had been admitted to the acquaintance of his
darling; whom he loved as I loved Kitty, but with a holier sense and
fear. She was lying on a horsehair sofa, in his poorly furnished room;
for he was poor, as a good man is nearly always somehow. And I never
shall forget the look she gave me from her weary eyes, quite as if the
depth of kindness were enhanced by its want of power. And she rose upon
one wasted arm, and offered me a hand just like a white kid glove, that
has been drawn off.

“You have been very good to father;” she looked at my sunburnt face,
as if she would like to remember it somewhere else; “and what lovely
grapes you bring me! See, how greedy I have been!”

It was as much as I could do to keep my eyes from being like
grape-stalks; and I tried to drive my sorrow inwards, by thinking that
all of it was wanted there. But it would not do, and I turned away.

“What she wants is outdoor air;” I said, as soon as we left the room,
and her father asked me what I thought; and I said it more to hide my
own distress, than from any hope at all. “Outdoor air without exercise,
and with very gentle movement.”

“Sims, the flyman, is very good;” her father’s lips trembled as he
spoke, and he tried to make a smile of it; “he knows that we cannot
afford much carriage-hire, and he comes at half-price when he has
nothing else to do. But since the other spring broke, she can hardly
bear it. She fainted twice, the last time we went.”

“But the river, the water, the Thames!” I said, almost fearing to make
a suggestion so stale, “what can be more easy than the gliding of a
boat? Is that even too much for her?”

“Bessy has never tried it yet,” said the anxious father, pondering
much; “when I was at Oxford I loved the river; but I have not found
time for it for many years. And I fear it would be cold upon the water.”

“It is much more likely to be too hot;” I answered, with some wonder,
at the clear unselfishness of this man, who loved the river, yet lived
upon its banks, without ever taking boat, for fear of slighting duty;
“the sun strikes very strong upon the river; but after four o’clock it
is delightful. I know a boat that would exactly suit her. She can lie
upon the cushions in the stern. The weather is beautifully calm and
warm. Will you let me try it?”

He was loth to consent without leave from Dr. Sippets, which of course
was right enough; but the doctor said it was the very thing he was
going to recommend that very day; and as soon as the poor girl heard
of it, she would scarcely hear of any other thing. We had an old boat
of our own, but it was not nice enough for her; so I went as far as
Shepperton for the one of which I had spoken to him. This was a very
commodious affair, and the name painted on it was _The Duchess_,
obliterating the old name _Emmy Moggs_; for a genuine duchess had been
in it, while staying for her health at Walton. Phil Moggs was the
owner, and he raised his price, as soon as he had painted out his good
wife’s name. And he thought so much of this boat now—though described
by rivals as the washing-tub—that he always insisted on going with it.
However, he was not a bad sort of fellow, though belonging henceforth
by his own account, to the higher aristocracy. The cheaper men called
him “the Duke,” and he accepted the title without ill-will.

Regardless of expense, I hired boat and him, under private agreement
that Mr. Golightly should pay him half a crown, and suppose that all.
And we brought the young lady in a bath-chair to the bank, and shipped
her without any difficulty. And it was worth a lot of money to behold
her fair young face, delicate with dreams of heaven, taking the flush
of the firmer air, and gradually kindling with the joys of earth. She
looked at every tree we glided past, and every fair garden upon either
bank, and every feathered bend of hill and hollow, as if they were
coming to her in a dream, yet so that she could make friends of them.
At first her dear father clasped her hand, as if she could glide more
smoothly so; but soon she became more independent, and wanted both
hands, to point out her delight. Then the tears of kind pleasure came
into his eyes, and he turned away, and looked at the world for himself,
and thanked God for this little touch of happiness.

“Shall we rest a minute beneath this willow?” he said, as the sun drew
along the stream, and the myriad twinkles of bright air seemed to be
dancing to the silver chord of waves; then we slid into the silence of
a cool arcade, and I said,—

“It is high time for Moggs to have some beer.”

Mindful of this prime need of every British waterman, I had brought a
little stone jar from my uncle’s tap; and thinking that the savour of
this fine beverage might not be agreeable to our fair freight, I landed
on the island, with a wink to “the Duke;” and he very kindly followed
me. The Pastor knew well that his flock must be fed, and he extended
his knowledge to the neighbouring parish.

There was lemonade and strawberries for the weaker vessels; and while
they remained afloat, and entered into these, Moggs and I sat behind a
bush, and considered what was good for us.

“I suppose you don’t often come Sunbury way;” I said, just to lend a
little tongue to tooth-work; for I had bought some bread and a hunk of

“Nobs goes mostly up the river, Chertsey, and Laleham, and the Mead,
and that likes,” Mr. Moggs replied, with his knife upon the bone.
“Ain’t been your way, pretty nigh three months.”

“Ah, but you had a nice time then. Very fine ale at the _Flower-pot_,

“Well, so there he; but quite as good nigher home. And I likes my drop
of beer, without no water in it. Here’s your good health, Mr. What’s
your name.”

“Thank you, Moggs; and the same to you. But I don’t understand about
water in your beer.”

“Well, did ever you see a young ’ooman cry enough to fill a bucket, let
alone a boat? I pretty nigh wanted one of them tarpaulins. Just lost
her Daddy, the old man said to me. But he told me not to speak of it;
no more I did. But I found out arterwards all about it. Seems she come
from Molesey, though I took her t’other side.”

“From Molesey? I know a good many of the people there. The only man who
died there this summer, to my knowledge, was an old bachelor by the
name of Powell. What was this young woman’s name?

“Watson, or Wilson, I won’t be certain which. Never mind; I dare say
she’s all right by now. The more they takes on at first, the sooner
they gets shut.”

“But you took her on our side of the river, as you said. Did you go to
fetch her? What day was it? What was she like? Who sent you for her?
Where did you land her? How came you—”

“Look here, Mr. What’s your name. You hires my boat, and you hires me
to row; but not to go on about other people’s business.”

“But it may be my own business, Philip Moggs. And you may get into
desperate trouble, by refusing to tell me all you know of it.”

“Not a bit feared of that,” the old man answered; “I’ve a-knowed
hundreds get into trouble with too much clacking, but never one the
other way.”

He shut up his mouth, and looked like an old villain of a horse I had
seen at Sam Henderson’s, who had pits above his eyes, and ears that
stuck back like a gun-cock, and a nose that was as wiry as a twisted
toasting-folk. This was a man who would whistle on his own nails to
warm them, but not to warn another man from going down a weir-pool.

“Well,” I said, “never mind; I don’t suppose it matters”—for I was
able to master my manners now, after three months of endurance; “only
somebody has a bit of money upon something; and you might cut in for
it, if you gave a hand. But I’ll be bound you know nothing about it,
after all. You fellows, who are always on the water, dream all sorts of
stuff, just as I did this afternoon.”

“Then, Mister, I’ll just keep my dreaming to myself. I did hear of
something queer down your way. But least said, soonest mended. Time to
be shoving off again.”

On the homeward row, I did my best to drive out of my mind all
thought of this ancient mariner, and his story. And he feigned not
to be thinking of it; though I caught his wrinkled eyelids dropping
suddenly at the sudden glances which I cast upon him. He was watching
me narrowly, when I looked away; and I thought it likely that he would
land again when he had discharged us, and try to learn all about me in
the village. For we at Sunbury knew but little of the Shepperton people
at that time, looking on it rather as a goose-green sort of place,
benighted, and rustic, and adverse to good manners. Shepperton, without
equal ground, despised us, as a set of half-Cockneys, and truckling for
the money of London, which they very nobly contemned, because they got
so little of it. If anything exciting came to pass at Sunbury, these
odd people shrugged their shoulders, and talked about Bow Street, and
Newgate, and the like; as if they belonged to Middlesex, and we to
London. However, there can be no doubt which is the finer village.

I was much dissatisfied with myself, when I came to think of it, for
allowing as I did this boatman’s story so to dwell upon my mind, that
even the fair invalid in the stern lost many little due attentions. But
happily she fell fast asleep, being sweetly lulled by the soft fine
air, and the dreamy melody of waters. Her long eyelashes lay flat in
the delicate hollows of her clear white cheeks, where a faint tinge of
rose began to steal, like the breath of a baby angel.

“How beautiful she looks!” I whispered to her father, as he gazed at
her; and he answered—“Yes. How can I bear it? It is the beauty of a
better world.”

But he was in livelier mood about her, when we took her gently home;
and she rose from the chair with a rally of strength, and he said,
“Well, Bessy, how do you feel now?”

“As if I wanted a good tea,” she answered; “and as if I never could
thank this gentleman for the pleasure he has given us.”

I wondered whether in trying ever so feebly to give pleasure, I might
have won, without earning, some great good for myself; and off I went
(after proper words) to follow the course of the _Duchess_.

In a minute or two, I had gained a spot which commanded the course of
the river; and there I perceived that the unmistakable Moggs, instead
of hastening home, was resting on his oars to watch the bank, and make
sure that no one was watching him. I slipped into a quiet niche, which
made me think of Kitty; for here I had seen her surveying the flood, in
the days of my early love for her. It had been a happy place that day;
would it help me once again?

Presently Moggs made up his mind, if haply it had been wavering; and
pulling into the evening shadows, sought a convenient landing-place.
Then he fastened the _Duchess_ to a stump, and stiffly made his way
towards that snug little hostelry the _Blue Anchor_, favoured by most
of our waterside folk.

“That will do,” thought I; “he has conquered his contempt of Sunbury.
He is going to pick up all he can about me. There must be something in
it. And now for the Molesey story.”

Without delay I returned to our village, and through it hastened to the
landing, where our ancient boat was kept. There was no fear of meeting
Moggs down here, for he was a good half-mile above. Pulling leisurely
down stream, I began to think how stupid we had been in our inquiries,
at least if my present idea proved correct. But the policemen, to whom
we had entrusted the first part of the search, must bear the blame of
this stupidity. They had not failed to make inquiry among the boatmen,
and along the river; although their attention had been directed chiefly
to the roads and railway. But they had assumed throughout that the
fugitive must have gone towards London, and as regarded the Thames,
they had only cared to inquire much down stream. Up the river there was
as yet no railway, and no important road; and with their usual density,
they had searched but very vaguely hereabout.

At Molesey I had friends who knew every item of what happened there;
and they soon convinced me that no young woman weeping for her father’s
recent loss was likely to have quitted that good village, east or
west, at the time in question. Therefore Phil Moggs had been deceived,
whether by his passenger or others, as to that part of the story.

I was greatly surprised to find how little the general mind of Molesey
seemed to be concerned about my case. Few seemed even to have heard of
it; and the few who did know something knew it all amiss, or had put
it so, by their own imaginations. Indeed I could scarcely have guessed
that the story, as recounted there, had aught to do with my poor humble
self. Even Uncle Corny—great in fame at Sunbury, and even Hampton,—was
but as a pinch of sand flung from a balloon, to these heavy dwellers in



DOES it lighten a man’s calamities, or does it increase their burden,
to know that they are spread abroad and talked of by his fellow-men? No
man wishes to be famous for his evil fortune; and as for pity, he is
apt to be alike resentful, whether it is granted or denied. But that is
quite another point. Without a bit of selfishness, and looking at their
own interests only, I certainly had a right to complain that an outrage
which must move the heart of every honest husband, and thrill the
gentler bosom of his faithful wife, had scarcely stirred a single pulse
at Molesey; just because the river ran between us. None of the papers
(except one that we subscribed to, at an outlay of four and fourpence
per annum) had taken up my case with any fervour; as sometimes they
do, when there is nothing in it, like a terrier shaking a skull-cap.
This depends on chance; and all chances hitherto had crossed their legs
against me, so that I could bring forth no sound counsel.

When I told my uncle of my last suspicion, and that I could go no
further with it, because of the stubbornness of Phil Moggs he became so
enraged that I saw he was right.

“What!” he exclaimed—“that old hunks dare to refuse any further
information! I wonder you did not take him by the neck, and hoist him
clean over the tail of his _Duchess_. No doubt you would have done it
without the young lady. He would never dare to try it on with me. Why
I knew him when he dug lob-worms at the Hook. He has forgotten me, I
daresay. Well, I’ll remind him. You shall pull me up there to-morrow
morning. One way or the other, we’ll crack his eggshell. I could never
have believed it of him.”

It did not concern me to inquire; but so far as I could make out what
my uncle meant, he was not at all pleased with Mr. Moggs for having
got on in the world so well. No man can satisfy his friends in that
respect; unless he makes so big a jump that he can lift them also, and
even so he never does it to their satisfaction.

“To think of that fellow,” my dear uncle grumbled, all the way to
Shepperton, “owning half a dozen boats, and calling one of them the
_Duchess_! Why, I gave him an old pair of breeches once, that he might
not be had up for indecency. And now he calls my nephew, ‘Mr. What’s
your name!’ Do you know who his wife was? No, of course you don’t. But
I do. Why, she was in the stoke-holes at old Steers’,’ the pineapple
grower at Teddington. And no one knew whether she was a boy or a girl,
with a sack and four holes in it, for her arms and legs. But what a lot
of money they made then! He sold all his pines at five guineas apiece
to George the Fourth, and sometimes he got the money. Ah, there will
never be such days again. You must scrimp and scrape, and load back
from the mews, and pay a shilling, where they used to pay you to take
it. But here we are! Let him try his tricks with me.”

Unluckily my uncle got no chance of terrifying Mr. Moggs, as he
intended. We landed at a very pretty slab-faced cottage, covered with
vines and Virginia creepers, and my uncle began to shout—“Moggs,
Phil Moggs!” quite as if he were a Thames Commissioner. But no Moggs
answered, nor did any one appear, till my uncle seized a boat-hook,
and thundered at the door. Then a very respectable-looking woman, with
a pleasant face and fine silver hair, came and asked who we were, and
showed us in. She seemed to know my uncle very well, though he was not
at all certain about her.

“Is it possible, ma’am, after all these years,” he began in his best
manner, “that I see the young lady I once had the pleasure of knowing
as Miss Drudger?”

“You see the old woman, who was once that girl,” she answered, as she
offered him a chair; “ah, those indeed were pleasant days!”

I thought of the stoke-hole, and could well have believed that my uncle
had been romancing, if I had ever known him capable of that process.
But she very soon reassured me.

“I worked hard then, and I had no worries. But I have known plenty of
care since then. I suppose you came to see my husband, sir. Is there
any business I can do? He started for his holiday this morning. The
doctor has been ordering him change of air; and at last I persuaded
him to go. He is gone for a month or so, to Southsea. We have a
daughter there doing very well indeed. She is married to a large
boat-builder. My eldest son George sees to everything here, now his
father has taken him partner. But I keep the books, and can take any
order, just as if Mr. Moggs was at home.”

It seemed rather strange that she should speak like this, quite as if
she expected some inquiry. I looked at my uncle and saw that the same
idea was passing through his mind.

“Thank you, Mrs. Moggs,” he said, as if he wanted time to think; “I
fear that we must not trouble you. But are you in the habit of entering

“All the more important ones we do. At least for the last year or two
we have. It was through a curious thing that happened, and we were
nearly getting into trouble.”

“You cannot be expected to show your books to strangers. I wanted to
ask one little question. Moggs would have answered it with pleasure.
But of course, as he is not at home—”

“That need not make any difference, sir. Everything we do is plain and
open. We don’t make a practice of showing our books. But if there is
any particular entry you wish to inquire about, I shall be glad to help
you. That is, if you can tell me the right date.”

Again we were surprised at her alacrity. But after a few words, my
uncle mentioned the 15th of last May, as the date of the occurrence he
wished to be informed about.

“Let us look at the day book,” she answered very promptly; “that will
show everything we did then. It is in the next room. You shall see it
in a minute.”

While she was gone, my uncle leaned both hands upon his stick, and
looked at me. “This is all gammon, Kit,” he whispered; “never mind; you
watch her.”

The old lady soon reappeared with the book, which was nothing but a
calendar interleaved.

“You see I have learned business since you knew me, Mr. Orchardson,”
she said as she turned back to the date; “Moggs isn’t half such a
scholar as I am; but George is a great deal better. Why, he can do
decimals, and fractions, and all that. You don’t mind my turning back
the edge of the leaf. Our prices, of course, are our own concern. We
don’t seem to have done much on the day you speak of.”

“Very little indeed. Much less than usual; though the day, if I
remember right, was beautifully clear and sunny. There seem to have
been only three boats out, and all of them up the river. Your husband
spoke of coming down our way; but I suppose it was some other time. And
of fetching a lady, who cried all the way.”

“Then it must have been some other day. It could never have been on
that day, you may be certain; or here it would be in black and white.
But he never remembers when he did a thing; and he often mixes up two
years together. A lady who cried? Why, let me see; I did hear something
about it. Was she in deep mourning, Mr. Orchardson?”

“Not in deep mourning at all; but a grey summer dress, and a short
cloak, or jacket, or whatever you call it, braided in front and
scolloped round the bottom. And a very beautiful face with blue eyes,
like the colour of the sky in settled weather—oh, but she may have
cried them out, so you must not go by that, so much. And she had a
pretty way of putting up one hand—”

“Shut up,” I said, for who could stand all this? And Mrs. Moggs looked
at me, as if she was so sorry.

“Oh, then it must be some one different altogether. The young party I
heard of was about a year ago, and they did say she was going to her
father’s funeral, whether that day or the next, I won’t be certain.
My poor Moggs begins to get queer in the head, from being so much on
the water, no doubt. He is right about most things, and you may take
his word for untold gold, Mr. Orchardson. Such a man of his word never
lived, I do believe. Sometimes I say it is unnatural, and he ought
to try to break himself; for if every one was like him, where would
business be? But without days and months, he is wrong more than right,
even when he have been to church and heard the psalms. No, no, sir; he
have put you in the wrong boat altogether. It can’t have been any of
our people.”

“You are sure to know best;” said my uncle, looking at her, in a very
peculiar way of his, which was apt to mean—“You are a liar;” and she
seemed to know well what was meant by it. “Mrs. Moggs, we are much
obliged to you. Remember me to your worthy husband”—he laid a little
stress on the adjective—“as soon as he comes back from Southsea.
Or rather when you join him there. What station do you find most

“Woking, sir; there are others nearer. But that is the first where all
trains stop, without you go back to Surbiton. ’Tis a long drive to
Woking; but they will soon come nearer, according to what I hear of
it. How they do cut up the country, to be sure! They are talking of a
lot of cross-lines already. But the river is the true line, made by the
Lord, and ever so much more pleasant.”

“So it is, Mrs. Moggs; and quite fast enough for me, when it isn’t
frozen over, as it was last winter. Ah, you must have had a bad time
then! But I am glad to have found you so flourishing. Good-bye, and we
are very much obliged to you.”

“Oh, the liar!” he cried, as we shot out of hearing. “Put a beggar on
horseback—it is the truest saying. Here comes a boat of theirs, by the
colour! Hold hard a moment, Kit; I want to ask a question.”

Easing oars, we glided gently past a light boat fitted for double
sculling, with only one young fellow in it, perhaps an apprentice.

“Young man,” said my uncle; “we want to know the name of your best
doctor here in Shepperton. Your governor is an old friend of mine.
What’s the name of the one he goes to?”

“He!” cried the young fellow, balancing his sculls; “he never been to
no doctor in his life. Don’t look as if he wanted one, do he? Oh, I
wish I was as tough as the old bloke is.”

“What do you think of that, Kit? Pretty solid, don’t you think? What a
bushel of lies we have had from that old Emmy! ‘Jemmy’ she was called,
till she turned out a girl, and then they took the J off. Such things
don’t happen in these schooling days; and much good they have done
with them! That thief of a Moggs has cut away, you see, through what
he heard last night in Sunbury. They’d lynch him there, if they knew
he had a fist in it. Now one thing is quite clear to me. Your dear
Kitty was taken in a boat, to Shepperton, or somewhere up the river;
and Moggs was paid well for doing it, and to hold his tongue about it
afterwards. Most likely he did not bring the _Duchess_, but a lighter
and swifter boat, perhaps the one we met. It is useless to ask any of
his fellows; you may be sure he never let them know of it. And it would
have been dark by the time he took her. He spoke of an old man, you
told me, when he let out what has put us up to this. Could that Downy
have made himself into an old man?”

“He could make himself into almost anything; but never so completely
as to cheat my Kitty. It must have been some one he sent, and not
himself. She would never have gone with the scoundrel himself.”

“No, she was much too sharp for that. What lies can they have told, to
make her cry so? It is the d——dest plot I ever heard, or read of. And
not a word from her, all this time! if she had been alive, she would
have found a way to write. Whatever she might believe you had done,
she never would have been so cold-blooded to her Kit. That is the
darkest point of all. I know what women are. Even her step-mother would
scarcely have been so relentless. And Kitty was the softest of the soft
to any one she cared for. I fear that you must make up your mind to the
worst that can have happened, my dear boy.”

“I will do nothing of the sort,” I answered, although I had often tried
to do it; “and just when we have hit upon a fresh track, uncle! _Nip_
is in the stable. Can I have him? I shall start for Woking Road, this
very afternoon. It can do no harm, if it does no good. And I never
could sit still, and let it stop just as it is.”

“Very well; and I will telegraph for Tony Tonks to come down by the
time that you return. We are bound to let him know of this last turn of
the mystery.”

To this I agreed; and as soon as we got back, I saddled the young
horse _Nip_, and rode by way of Walton Bridge to Woking, feeling as I
went that I would almost rather know the worst, than live on in this
horrible suspense.

Woking Road Station was a very different place from what it is now, and
of much less importance. Where a busy town stands now, created by the
railway, and mainly peopled by it, there were in those days but a few
sad cottages in an expanse of dark furze and lonely commons. Very poor
sandy land, and black patches where the gorse had been fired, and one
public-house, called of course the _Railway Hotel_, and large sweeps
of young fir-plantations were its chief features then, and the shabby
station looked like a trunk pitched from the line.

There were two dirty flies, like watchmen’s boxes, one with the shafts
turned up, and the other peopled by a horse, who had been down upon his
knees, and was licking the flies off at his leisure. The driver was
sitting on a log in the distance, cutting bread and cheese, and sipping
something from a tin which appeared to have submitted to the black
embrace of bonfires.

Perceiving that this was a crusty old fellow, of true British fibre,
and paid by the day, which relieved him from restless anxiety for work,
I approached him as nearly as I could in his own vein.

“They don’t seem to be very busy here just now. But I suppose your old
nag can go along when he likes. How much do you charge to Shepperton?”

“Shepp’ton, Shepp’ton? Never heard of no such place. Which way do it
lie, governor?

“Well, you had better ask,” I said very craftily as I fancied; “some
of your mates will be sure to know. Some of them must have been there
before now. They can tell you how far it is.”

“None of them at home this afternoon,” the lazy rogue answered, as he
took another mouthful; “better ask station-master. Like enough, he

“He has nothing to do with you. And I want to know what the fare is.
Look here, I’ll stand you a pint at the bar, if you will just come up,
and find out what it is. Some of your mates must have been as far as
that, to take people for the pike-fishing. Shepperton is a great place
for that.”

“Very well, come along. But what do you want a cab for, when you’ve got
your own horse, and a good ’un too?”

“Stick to your own business,” I answered gruffly; and that tone seemed
to have more charm for him, as happens very often with ill-conditioned
men; “you are on your legs now, try to keep them moving.”

“Gent wants to know fare to Shepperton;” he shouted through the
precincts of the bar into the stable-yard. “Any of you chaps been there
lately? Governor gone up to have a snooze.” He illustrated that point
with a genial wink.

“Why, Tom been there, not so very long agone,” said a little old
man who was washing a double curb under the pump, and twisting out
the grime with his thumbnails; “or if it wasn’t Tom, it was Joe—Joe
Clipson, so it was. And a long job it were. I had to stop up for him.
Thought something must have happened—he were gone such a time.”

“Ah, but perhaps he went with a fishing party,” I said as indifferently
as I could; “when people go fishing they won’t be hurried. Come in and
have a glass of beer yourself, my friend.”

“Well, no. I never see’d no rods, nor baskets, nor nothing of that
sort, so far as I remember. But he did say something about waiting for
a boat. Thank’e, sir, thank’e; here’s your good health.”

“How long ago was it? And who went with him?” My hand began to shake a
little, do what I would. For I seemed to be on the track at last, where
no one was likely to be bribed into lying.

“Well, I don’t know justly, for I worn’t here when he went; and when he
come back, he had been to station first, and I were that sleepy that I
didn’t care to hearken, nor he to gab much, for that matter; but I know
he said something about a young femmel. And how long agone? Why, let me
see. Must ’a been about time for sowing scarlet-runners, for I mind my
little grand-darter was playing with them, pointing out the speckles,
and no two quite alike, a thing as I never took no heed on; and I must
a’ been shelling of them for her mother.”

“What time do you generally sow scarlet-runners here? Not, I suppose,
till all chance of frost is over.”

“Well, sir, generally about third week in May month. There is a lucky
day, I know—birthday of Saint Somebody. Rabbit me if I can tell his
name—the chap as took the Devil by the nose and made him holler. Blest
if I shouldn’t ’a liked to see that though. Wouldn’t you, Bill? What a
spree it must ’a been!”

“I can’t remember anything about those saints. Our parson isn’t one to
insist upon them. But the one that did that, was called ‘Dunstan,’ I
believe. ‘Dunstan,’ does that sound like it?”

“Why, it is the very ticket!” he exclaimed, with a clink of his pewter
on the slate slab, made up to look like marble. “Bill, you know, that’s
the day for putting scarlet-runners in?”

“Was it him as was going in a cab, to what you call it?”

“No, no, Bill. You never had no eddication. They used to teach us
better in the times gone by. ’Twas three, or four days before his time.
Fetch a Prayer-book, miss; and then I’ll prove it.”

The young lady in the bar, who had been looking at us queerly, tossed
her head, as if to say—“What fools these men are!” Then she swept the
money out of reach, and disappeared. Presently she came back, with an
ancient Prayer-book; and my old friend, after spitting on his fingers,
turned over the leaves of the calendar, and shouted—“Here it is! I
could ’a sworn to it, from Sunday-school. May 19th. St. Dunstan’s Day!”

He put his thumb upon the place, and made a long-abiding mark; and I
never shall forget again St. Dunstan’s Day. Those Board schools never
teach such useful things as that. And at grammar-school we only kept
the best of the Apostles.

“Where is Joe Clipson to be found?” I asked. “Surely he could tell us
all about it. I will give a sovereign to know who came in his cab, that
night, from Shepperton.”

All who had gathered for that great discussion looked at me with
astonishment and fear. And I saw that I had made a wrong move
altogether. For nothing shuts up country mouths so sharply, as the
hovering in the air of a thing that may prove criminal. At the same
time, I saw that deep interest was stirred; and I fancied, very
naturally, that it must be in my favour.

“Can’t say when Joe will be at home,” said my old friend. “He have gone
to Knapp Hill with a gent, to see the trees. When they gets among they,
they never comes back in a hurry. Might be nine o’clock afore he comes

I looked at my watch, and saw that I must start at once, if I meant
to be at home in time to meet Tony Tonks. And it struck me, that he
would be much more capable of going through with the inquiries here,
than I, who had already made a muddle of it, by putting questions too
point-blank. So I tried to put on a careless manner.

“Well, we won’t say any more about it now. Only I should like to know
what fish they caught; or whether they weighed in at the club with what
they bought. If we think it worth while to go on with this, we can send
a boy over, to hear Joe’s account. It doesn’t concern any one except
ourselves. But we don’t like to be beaten by the silver hook. There is
a rare fish at Shepperton, that nobody can catch.”

They looked at me, as if they could not quite accept this turn; and
there was much disappointment on the barmaid’s face; for, with a
woman’s instinct, she had scented a romance. But without another word,
I jumped into the saddle, and was soon upon the furzy commons, full of
prickly wonderings.



“WE are on the straight road now,” said Tonks, as soon as he had heard
my story; “and jigger me if we don’t hunt her down. But luck can give
five stone to skill, whether the course be straight or round. I have
done all I know; but you beat me in a canter, just by getting the
inside turn. But unless I am out of it altogether, you may trust me to
fetch up by-and-by. I must find out who that old chap was. It could not
be Downy himself, you think. Not likely that she would have gone with
him. Well, now you want to hear what I have done; and I think it leads
to something.

“I am bound to be terrible leary, you see, for he is uncommon
wide-awake. If he had spent all his life in the sharpest stables, he
could hardly have been more up to snuff. He never believes a single
word a fellow says, until he has been round it to know the reason.
I can’t abide that sort of thing myself, for it gives such a lot of
trouble on both sides. If he asked you what o’clock it was, and you
looked at your watch and told him, he’d place no faith in it, unless he
saw the hands; and even then he would doubt whether you had not shifted
them, on purpose to mislead him.”

“Such a rogue should be knocked on the head,” said my uncle; “and I
wish I had the doing of it.”

“It makes everybody hate him, although his manner is not rough. He
never seems to think it worth his while to take offence at people. But
they would rather have that, than what he does. Old Pots is popular
compared to him; because Pots hates his enemies. But this man goes on
as if they were not worth hating. And that has made me doubt sometimes
why he has done this; and sometimes whether he has done it at all.”

“If he has not done it, it can only be the Devil,” my uncle broke in
with some anger; “I am not superstitious, but the Devil might be vexed
by Professor Fairthorn’s kick-me-jigs, and run off with his daughter,
just to dig him in the ribs. By George, I never thought of that before!”

“And I hope you won’t think of it again,” I said, in great haste that
the idea might not go into his mind, for it would be hard work to get
it out again; “I should hope you know better, Uncle Corny! Would the
Devil think of paying such a price as Phil Moggs gets, and hire a
four-wheeler to Woking Road Station?”

“You are right, Kit. He will have full value for his money; and he
never could have stood the smoke I made. He gets too much of that at
home. But Tonks says now that he doubts if Bulwrag did it. What are we
coming to? Are we all to start again, as if we had never spent twopence
over it? Tonks has been with him a deal too much. When two fellows get
together so, they can’t smell one another.”

“I judge just the same as if I never saw him. He isn’t one to get over
a fellow with his looks, nor his manner neither. Mr. Orchardson, you
are quite wrong there. I go by observation, and nothing else.”

“And what has come of your observations?” My uncle still despised Mr.
Tonks, and he hated to be told that he was wrong, especially when I
heard it.

“A good deal,” said Tonks, leaning back in his chair and collecting his
ideas; “a good deal, if you place confidence in me; without which I act
for nobody. I don’t pretend to be any wonder. But when I take a man’s
money, I am true to him. I have plenty of other jobs I can take to.
Throw me over, if you choose, and have done it.”

“No, Tony Tonks, we will not do that. I believe that you are doing all
you know; and I am a reasonable man. Now tell us all that you have to

“Well, there isn’t very much, but it may come to something more,
especially with what you have just found out. The worst of it is that
he is getting shy of me, and I dare not say things as I did. I told
him that I wanted to run down, to take stock of Henderson’s place down
here, and I asked him if he knew the neighbourhood, and whether we
should take a trap and run down together. If I could get him to that, I
might pick up a lot of things, in a careless and casual way, you know.
But he was much too fly for any game of that sort; and it almost seemed
to me as if he smelled a rat. Then I got on to him about the scientific
codgers, thinking to lead up to the old Professor and the cruise he is
going on about the bottom of the sea, and the place for laying cables,
and a lot of things like that. But that wouldn’t serve; and so I tried
another lay. We were talking of old Pots, and I said, ‘Oh, by-the-bye,
was it true that the old fool was sweet upon some girl, some girl with
a lot of money, who pitched him over?’ And he said, ‘What a joke! I
should like to hear of that. Tell us the story, Bowles, if you know
it.’ Bowles is the name he knows me by, you see; for it would not do
for me to turn up as Tonks.

“In fact I got no hold upon him, as I thought I should have done; for
he knows how to make people useful and no more; and I saw that he
would drop me as soon as he had learned all the little useful things
I know at cards and pool. Of course I was not swell enough for him to
introduce me to his ‘family circle,’ as the ladies call it. And as for
getting him to take a drop too much, and then working him skilfully, as
can be done with most fellows,—well, I am pretty tough, but if I took
the water and he the brandy, I believe I should be drunk before he was.
His head is too big for any barrel to upset it.

“I was pretty near despairing, I can tell you, Mr. Orchardson, though I
never have been beaten yet, and don’t want to begin it; when a little
bit of accident, the merest casual accident, put me further forward
than a month of work might do. You may be pretty sure, without my
saying, that my appearance is not distinguished enough—although I have
gone arm in arm with bigger nobs than he is, and real gentlemen some
of them—but not swell enough to be seen in Downy Bulwrag’s company, in
Piccadilly, or the Park, or high and mighty places. No no, not for Joe,
as the poet quotes it.

“But he is not at all above allowing me the honour of his society, when
I can be of service to him, and no one is likely to say—‘Who’s that?’
And there is one particular house of his—never mind where, that has
nothing to do with it—at which he always likes to have me, and treats
me quite as his honoured friend. And there we were on Monday night,
tickling the pigeons, as you might say, which is only what they expect
of us. He can beat me now in my own inventions, not from any superior
skill, but because he is the coolest hand ever seen, and nothing puts
him out of tune.

“He had won all along the board that night, and his pockets were full
of money; but instead of being up, as a decent fellow would be, he took
all his luck in a cold-blooded way, just as if it were nothing to what
he deserved. That is never the right way to get any more. You must
never do that, Mr. Orchardson.”

“Sir, I never gamble; and I want no lesson.” My uncle spoke severely;
he thought it due to me to do so.

“It is too late in life for you to begin,” Tonks proceeded affably;
“and your hands are too hard, Mr. Orchardson. But as I was saying, we
came down the stairs, and slipped out very quietly. It was one of those
little streets off Soho, where a man who knows London like the lines of
his own hand may lose himself in half a minute, by one wrong turning.
The night was very dark, and all the publics shut up long ago, and not
a light was to be seen, except a dull lamp here and there. But we were
quite used to this sort of thing, and felt no sort of fear, though we
knew that we were passing through a den of robbers; and a man who has
a lot of money in his pockets is inclined to fancy somehow that every
stranger knows it.

“Suddenly, as we went by a narrow reeking archway, a fellow sprang out
of it immediately behind us. Before I could turn, I heard a crash, and
there he lay, sent backward by a heavy blow from Bulwrag’s fist. I
thought that he was killed, for the blow had been tremendous; such as I
have seen, when they meant business in the prize-ring. But luckily for
him, the fellow wore a hard-rimmed hat, which lay behind him doubled
up, while he rolled over, gasping.

“‘Not much got out of that,’ said Downy, looking at his knuckles; ‘the
sooner we slope the better, Bowles; or there will be a rumpus.’

“‘We can’t go, before we see whether you have killed him. You hit him
hard enough to kill an ox,’ I answered.

“‘Killed myself more likely. Just look at my hand. The fellow can’t be
hurt much. What had he on his hat-front? Don’t pick him up. He’ll be
better where he is.’

“But seeing no one up or down the street, I disobeyed him, and drew the
stunned man into the shadow of the archway, and set him with his head
against the bricks, while Bulwrag showed much more concern about his

“‘Here it is—a metal thing! I shall keep it. Put his hat on again,
Bowles; and let him meditate. We don’t want to cut a shine at Bow
Street. Let’s be off!’

“I was rising to go, for I hate the police-courts, and the man was
evidently coming round, and could do very well without us. But before
we could leave him, he stretched out his hand, and said, ‘Captain,
Captain, for God’s sake stop a minute. I have got something for you
most important. I didn’t go to rob you, but to tell you something.’

“You may be sure that I was pretty wide awake at this; but of course
I took care not to show it. And I saw by a shadow on the line of wall
that Bulwrag had raised one hand, probably to his lips.

“‘Right!’ said the man, who was on his legs now, but sidled away into a
darker place; ‘let the other gent go. I was to tell you by yourself. I
daren’t come to your place, but you must come to mine.’

“‘Out with it! I never keep any secrets,’ Bulwrag replied, just to
humbug me. ‘Unless it concerns other people, and then—Well perhaps,
Bowles, you wouldn’t mind going to your den. Stop, let me speak to you
a moment outside.’

“He took me away, while the man stopped there; and I saw that his
object was to prevent me from finding out any more about that fellow. I
was forced to let him have his way that far, and to play a waiting game
with him.

“‘Some bosh or other,’ he whispered roughly; ‘I think I know who
the fellow is, and all about it. A gamekeeper’s daughter down in
Hampshire—always wanting money. Stop, you may as well take most of
this, for fear of my being too soft-hearted. There, leave me five;
that’s as much as I can spare. Good-night! Very much obliged. See you

“‘You had better mind what you are about,’ I said; ‘he owes you a
grudge, and you are in a slummy part, you know. I’ll come with you, if
you like, and wait outside.’

“‘You had better not wait at all. I am apt to mistake people, as you
have seen already?’

“This was a threat; and as such I took it, walking off with a dignity
which must have vexed him. However, as soon as I was round the corner,
I slipped a pair of rubber socks, that I always carry with me, over my
boots, and put myself on duty in other ways; so that if he met me in
the shadow, or even ten yards from a lamp, he would have little chance
of knowing me. And in less than two minutes I was back again; not in
the archway, of course, but at a place from which I could make out
part of what was going on there. For I knew that there was something
up quite out of the common way with him. Now how did I know that? Can
either of you tell me?”

“Why, of course, by his knocking that fellow down,” my uncle replied
sagaciously; “that was a bit of by-play, I suppose.”

“Not it. That was all done, bone fiddles—as we say. I knew it by the
pile of cash he gave me to hold for him. Oh, he is a deep file, and all
there at any moment. He had clearly formed a low opinion of your humble
servant, and thought that I should bolt with all the rhino, and be seen
no more. And it could be no trifle that made him risk the sum of five
and forty pounds.”

“Forty-five pounds!” I exclaimed; “how strange! Why that was the very
sum”—But here I stopped, for I did not wish to go into that question
with him.

“Yes, forty-five pounds, when I came to count it. I could not tell
how much it was, at the moment; but I felt that it was a tidy lump of
cash, and I jumped at his motive in handing it to me. But he reckoned
altogether without his host there. Well, when I came back, there they
were, still at it. I could not hear a word of what they said, for I was
forced to keep my distance. But I guessed that the skunk would take him
somewhere, for what he had said beforehand, and then my wits would come
into play. And sure enough he did, for in about two minutes they both
came out, and looked up and down the street, to make sure that they
were not followed. Seeing no one, they set off, at a good quick step,
and I took the right style to be after them.

“They turned so many corners, and went through so many alleys, that no
other man in the world could have kept them in sight, as I did, without
blundering on them. We passed through many places I knew nothing of;
but at last I stowed them in a quiet little den, not very far from
Drury Lane. Here the fellow went down a steep narrow staircase, and
knocked at a door that was like a cellar-flap. Downy stopped outside;
which I thought was very wise of him, while the other went in, and for
some time disappeared. But Downy came back to the entrance for fresh
air, or perhaps to be certain that he was not watched. And I gave
myself up for lost; but most luckily an empty truck or barrow stood
against the wall, and I just slipped under it in time. I could have
touched him with my hand, but the place was very dark; and he went back
without twigging me.

“I have had many narrow shaves, but none to beat that. He would have
killed me with a blow, and in a hole like that, I should soon have been
under the flagstones. I had no time to be in a funk till it was over;
but then I began to shiver horribly, and my nerves were not fit to be
trusted any more.

“I knew this; and thinking of it made them worse, for I have a wife and
seven children to look after. All I cared for now was to get away, for
I had run the chap to earth, and could put my hand upon him.

“There was no chance of overhearing any of their talk, even if they had
any; and if they once discovered me, even though I might escape, there
would be no chance of learning more. I could find the hole again, for I
had seen ‘Coke Yard’ daubed with a tar-brush on a patch of whitewash,
and wherever I have once been I can always go again. So when Bulwrag
turned back towards the door, I made ready to slip round the corner.

“But before I could do so, I heard the door creak, and the fellow with
the broken hat came out again. I heard him say—‘Now, you’ll believe me,
Captain. I’d be glad of the price of a new hat, afore you go.’ What it
was he gave to Downy, I could hardly see, but it looked like a packet
of papers, or letters, or something done up in paper. Downy gave him
something, and he said—‘That all? Ain’t much for such news;’ and then
Downy gave him more. ‘Daren’t come to your place. You come here,’ he
says, ‘if you want any more—say next Saturday night; ask for Migwell
Bengoose, and say _Cluck_.’ That was the name so far as I could catch
it. But I was bound to be off, for Bulwrag was coming. And you may
depend upon it that I did not stop to chat with him.”



WE were all pretty sure that this discovery of Tony’s concerned us
deeply, and might lead to something, if followed up at once with luck
and skill. But we thought it more important that he should go first to
Woking Road, and inquire further into the story of Joe Clipson’s cab,
which he was sure to do much better than myself; for he could make
himself look like a brother cabman, without any trouble.

He had little more to tell us about the Coke Yard yet, for he had to
feel his way very tenderly there, and must wait for opportunities. And
Bulwrag (who was never very sweet of temper, though, unlike his mother,
he could curb himself) had been more like a bear than a cultivated
Christian, since he got that cut across his knuckles. As our sympathies
were not with the sufferer, Tony made us laugh by his description of
the want of resignation in a case so trifling.

“Here it is,” cried Bulwrag, after hopping round the room, as soon as
his poultice began to draw; “look at this scurvy Saint! He is made of
copper. Why the devil couldn’t he have a Saint made of gold?”

Tonks replied that perhaps the individual with the hat could not afford
a golden Saint to sit upon the brim; and the copper perhaps had done
him a much better turn than gold, both in saving his head from the
crushing blow, and avenging it on the smiter. For the wound looked very
angry, and it might be even dangerous. But what made him wear such a
Saint at all?

“How the deuce can I tell why they wear such rubbish?” Bulwrag had
answered crustily. “Those foreign sailors are such fools. You know more
about him than I do.”

This was by no means true as yet, though Tonks hoped to make it so, if
allowed his own time about it. And he told us quite earnestly, and as I
believe sincerely, that he never had felt, not his mind alone, but his
heart, more deeply engaged in solving the merits of the darkest horse
in the leariest stable, than they both were now in getting to the very
bottom of this affair about my Kitty. And though I did not altogether
like his way of putting it, when the meaning is good we must not
quarrel with the manner in which other people look at things.

So we treated him well and put him up for the night; and the following
morning I drove him by way of Weybridge to Woking Road Station, or as
near thereto as we could get without any one observing us. Then I went
back to Weybridge, so as to meet him at that station, and hear all he
had to say, before he took another train for London.

Nothing could have been better managed. I borrowed a badge from Sims
the flyman, and a spotted yellow neckerchief, and a broken whip, and
Tony lounged into the inn-yard, as if he had left his cab down at the
blacksmith’s by the bridge. As I saw him in the distance I said to
myself that nature must have meant him for the driver of a cab, for he
put his knee out and turned his heels in, and carried his elbows, as if
he had been born so. Any brotherhood of good will and lofty feeling,
such as that of cabmen essentially is, must welcome him at once, and
make him free of any knowledge it possessed that would bring in nothing.

And so it proved, when he rejoined me by the two o’clock train at
Weybridge. “What have you ordered?” he asked; and I replied,—

“Chump chops, new potatoes, and pickled onions.”

“Couldn’t be better,” he was good enough to say; “but have in the
pewter first. Blest if I believe there’s anything to parch the throat
like a jolly good lie, and if I’ve told one, I’ve told fifty. Dinner
first, business afterwards.”

That I should consent to this will show how thoroughly I had
been drilled by long endurance and fretful discipline. Perpetual
disappointment too, and the habit which hope had now acquired of
falling without a blow—just like an over-matched prize-fighter—as well
as a sense of evil fortune, drove me sometimes almost into the apathy
of a fatalist. And so I let Tony Tonks munch on, and even joined him in
that process.

“I wish I had got that to do again,” he said, as at last he laid down
knife and fork; “I don’t often do so well as that. The air of these
commons is uncommon sharp, sharper even than the Heath is. But you have
been very patient, and I won’t keep you any longer. I found out all
they knew back there, and it only cost a shilling. I don’t know that it
is worth much more; for it carries us very little further. But so far
as it goes, it is plain enough. I had it from Joe Clipson, the man who
drove them; and no secret was made of the affair to him.”

Now the story, as he had it, comes to this. Some one got out at Woking
Road Station, on the afternoon of May 15th, it might have been an up
or it might have been a down train, Clipson could not say, for two
trains came in together, and the man had no luggage of any sort. The
date could be fixed by several things, and there could not be any doubt
about it. And the time when two trains meet there in the afternoon is
4.15; which comes pretty close to our figures.

This man carried nothing but a little bag, a little black leather bag,
such as nine people out of ten have. There were three cabs, or flies as
they called them there, waiting in the station yard; for it is their
busiest time of the day, and he chose Clipson’s, because the horse
looked freshest, and told him to drive to Shepperton, without saying a
word about the fare.

Clipson had not been in that part long, and he had scarcely heard
of Shepperton, which is severed from all those Surrey places by the
unbridged river. But it seemed to him a pleasant thing to start without
any fettering as to money, and the man who engaged him seemed very free
of that, in a style that said—“Never stand out for a shilling.” And
he seems to have acted up to this; although it is scarcely ever done,
except with a true friend’s money. But Clipson did not care whose it
was, if he might be allowed to go home with it.

The day was very bright and pleasant—exactly as I remembered it—with
plenty of light in the air, but no heat, and no flies to make horses
grieve that they cannot swear. Clipson remembered how cold it grew,
even before the sun went down, and he tucked a sack under his calves as
he came home, because he had promised Mrs. Clipson so, and his word was
more tender in absence.

He said that his fare seemed to know a good bit about the principles
of the road—that was the word he used for it—as if he had learned it
from a map, or description which somebody had rubbed into him. But he
was not in any way up to the corners, which show—as Joe said, and with
some reason too—whether a man understands what he is at properly. But
he knew where he was at Chertsey Bridge, and he waved his hand at the
first turn to the right.

Being a Surrey man, from some outlandish part in that straggling
country, Clipson was not at all comfortable upon our side of the river.
To a certain extent, and with much better reason, I feel the same thing
as regards them; though I admit (without thinking twice about it) that
there are plenty of good people there, and especially my Aunt Parslow.
But Clipson, although he depended for his livelihood upon a railway
station, did not like going into unknown places, especially with a
horse who might come down and stop there; for there was only one sound
knee out of sixteen that were washed in the yard every Saturday; but
that one belonged to Clipson.

His horse was a clipper, by his own account; and nobody could tell how
good he was, because he never had been called upon to do his best.
Still it was a toughish journey for him; and Mr. Clipson could not see,
taking the state of the roads into account, and the distance, and the
waiting, how he could charge less than five and twenty shillings; and
if asked to go again he would not do it for the money. For he waited
four hours, as he vowed, and I daresay it may have been three, at the
public-house, which is a sharp pull from the house of Phil Moggs at the

For these details I did not care so much (although they were full of
interest) as I cared to know who the man was that employed him, and how
he behaved, and whether he looked good, and above all how my darling
Kitty seemed to take things, and what she said, and whether she was
weeping all the way about myself. The cabman had paid no attention at
all to this part of the question, and could give no more account of
Kitty, than if she had been a portmanteau, or inside one. Tony Tonks
had never asked (as a man of kind nature would have done) whether my
dear had a handkerchief in her hand, or whether she seemed to gulp
down a sob, or how she looked up at the evening-star, or even what the
condition of her eyes was! For him it was quite enough to learn, that
the “young ’ooman looked down in the mouth like.” Well, that is the way
the world goes on.

About that I cared to make no fuss; for it even seemed a pleasure to
me that none but myself should know these things; remembering as I
did, that no one ever could cry as my Kitty could. For I never could
understand how it was, that having so very little practice as she had
(in spite of many opportunities), she could yet make anybody feel as if
all the world was woe, the moment there appeared a gleam of trouble in
her soft eyes. I am tolerably hard, and Uncle Corny harder still—from
having lived so much longer—but either of us would rather have had a
64lb. box of strawberries drop from the tail of the van upon the tender
places of both feet, than let a single word fall from us, even in the
hottest moment, to bring a cloud into those tender eyes. However, all
people are not like us; and perhaps she never let that cabman see what
was the matter with her; for she was proud, as well as gentle.

Moreover the man was hungry, and that makes a world of difference. The
kindest man that was ever born cannot be expected fairly to feel for
his fellow-creatures, when he is yearning after animals. The heart
being full of beef and mutton, because there are none in the stomach,
how can any room be left for creatures of less relish? This explanation
may be unsound; but at any rate the cabman did not melt at Kitty’s

And now two questions of prime importance rose in following out this
tale. It was evident from two accounts, both that of Moggs the boatman
and of Clipson the cab-driver, that no kind of compulsion had been
used to make Kitty go with them. It was plain that she went of her own
accord, deeply grieved—as the boatman’s story showed—but resigned and
patient. In the first place, then, who was the man that had done all
this to fetch her? And again, when they got to Woking Station, whither
did they journey thence?

As to the first point Tony Tonks had found out little more than I did.
The cabman said that he believed he would know the gent again if he
saw him, but there was nothing very particular about him to notice. He
seemed to be elderly, and rather short, but very sharp and active.
His clothes were dark, and he wore a short cloak, not much longer than
a policeman’s cape. He did not sit at the young lady’s side, but on
the front seat opposite to her, and he did not seem to be talking to
her much. It was quite dark when they left Shepperton, and it must
have been ten o’clock when they arrived, or later; for the horse was
a little lame from standing still so long. They did not seem to be in
any hurry, and as they had no luggage, except a couple of light bags,
he did not follow them on to the platform, and could not pretend to say
which way they went, for there were three more down-trains after that,
and four or it might be five to London.

As to that, Tonks had made vain inquiries of the station-porters,
and booking clerks. It was so long ago by this time, that even those
who might have noticed them had forgotten. They had passed into the
station, that was very well established; but after that nothing at all
could be discovered, and there the clue broke hopelessly.

After hearing all these things, I became sadly downcast. They reminded
me of that dreadful night when the snowdrifts overwhelmed me. I seemed
to be walking in the same sort of maze, continually struggling to
get forward, and perpetually driven back, seeming to walk with all
my might, yet by a stronger power to stand still. And losing all
confidence in myself, I asked Tony Tonks what he thought of it, just as
if he had been the great oracle that smelled the turtle soup of Crœsus,
without even longing for a taste of it.

“It all turns out just according to my views,” replied Tonks, as if he
saw his views running like the gravy, which he had been saving up to
drink out of the spoon; “the same as I have expressed all along, and
find them confirmed more by all I discover. Any one who puts two and
two together could swear that Downy Bulwrag is at the bottom of the
mischief, though he has taken uncommonly good care not to show his nose
in it. I am rather inclined to think that the lady is on the Continent.
They are more likely to have gone down the line than up. If they had
meant to go to town, what should have taken them to Woking? Supposing
they were shy of the Windsor line, Surbiton would have been their
place, or Weybridge. Though of course they might have thought Woking
road safer, so that we must not reason too much by that. By the way,
can the lady speak French at all? That might make a difference to her.”

“I am not at all sure,” I replied after thinking; “for we never
happened to talk of that. She was at a good school for a little time;
and then that hateful woman, her stepmother, took her away when she was
doing well, and sent her to a wretched place at £20 a year. She can
read French, I know, because I asked her something; but I doubt whether
she can speak it.”

“Then that’s where she is. I begin to smell a rat. He took her from
Southampton, depend upon it. And now I twig some bit of meaning in that
copper saint. The south of France—that’s where she is.”

“But why in the south of France, more than any other part?” I thought
that he was jumping rather fast to his conclusions.

“Well, it might be Italy, or Spain,” he answered, with a fine
generosity; “I can’t say very much about it. But a brother of mine
was at sea, till he was drowned, and he traded a good deal from the
south of France; and he had one of those things in his hat, because of
being struck by lightning. They get it very bad in those waters, he
declared; but I can’t call to mind the name of the saint that stops it.
Of course I have no faith in such stuff, though there might be nothing
to laugh at, after all I have seen about horses. But there it is. They
stick those things up, as an officer’s coachman mounts a cockade;
and bad luck it was for Master Downy’s knuckles. His hand was like a
pease-pudding yesterday. His flesh is always of a yellow nature, like a
Cochin China’s. Shouldn’t wonder a bit, if he got lockjaw.”

“Not till I have settled with him.” It made me forget the Rev. Peter,
and all his style of regarding things, when people spoke as if right
and wrong had an equal claim upon the Lord in heaven.



MY uncle, however, was not like that. He had suffered too largely from
rogues himself, in the neighbourhood of Covent Garden, to have any calm
way of considering them.

“Either a man is honest through and through, or else he is a thief
all over. It is humbug to talk as if a fellow didn’t know when he
is stealing, or when he is not. He knows it pretty sharp when it is
done to him; and he puts it short, as he has a right to do. And then
he turns the corner, and he wipes his mouth, and serves others with
the dose that made him sputter. To cheat the man that cheated you,
is Christian enough; but not to pass it on to other people. Ask Mr.
Golightly what he thinks about it.”

That pious clergyman would scarcely have been satisfied even with
my uncle’s view of Christian conduct, although he was moderate in
his expectations of us, after all his experience of our doings. This
made it very pleasant to be with him frequently; and for my part I am
certain that I never could have lasted through all this gloom, and
suspense, and indignation, without his example and quiet comfort. All
that we had found out, at Shepperton and at Woking, I owed to him, or
at any rate to my acquaintance with him; and although it might not
seem as yet to carry me much further, still I found some happiness in
knowing that little, and hope of learning more from it. And now I went
to him about another question, which I could not settle for myself.

It may be remembered that Tabby Tapscott, who came to attend to my
uncle’s house, had more than once given me good advice; and some may
have set me down as ungrateful for keeping her out of sight since my
great disaster, as if she were of no importance. But the real truth
is, that I had sought her counsel almost every time I saw her, and had
found much comfort from it, because she was so scornful. For the little
woman tossed her head, and shot forth her under-lip, as if she could
not trust herself to speak, so thoroughly was her mind made up. She
looked upon all that had happened as the fruits of a foul conspiracy on
the part of man against woman, and she scarcely held me guiltless. And
she had no patience with me, because I would not do the proper thing,
to find out all about it. Until I did that, she would say no more, but
leave me to listen to a set of zanies. Why on earth I refused was more
than she could understand; and she went so far as to declare, once or
twice, that I could not be in earnest about getting Kitty back, or I
would have done it long ago. She herself had known a girl, of Westdown
parish in the North of Devon, who found out all about her sweetheart’s
murder, and got two men hanged for committing it.

The means were certainly simple enough, if anything would come of
them. The bereaved one must let the full moon pass for as short a
time as possible; and then, at twelve of the middle-day, go to the
dress last worn by the lost one, and take something from the left side
pocket, or failing that cut a piece out. Then he might carry on as
he pleased, until it came to bed-time, and then do as follows. Under
the pillow on his left-hand side, he must place whatever he had taken
from the dress, and then instead of his common prayers, pray in the
following manner—

    “Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John,
     Bring me back my love that’s gone.
     Bring her white, or bring her red,
     According as she is ’live or dead.”

Then he must throw the window up, or out, if it was a lattice, and look
at the moon which would then be up (for he was supposed to keep good
hours, as all gentle lovers should); and after that he must lie down,
with his left ear on the pillow, and repeat the Doxology—which Tabby
called the “Doxy”—until it made him go to sleep. Then, as sure as he
was a living man—or in the other case a living woman—the lost one would
appear at midnight, and tell him all about it. Only he, or she, must
ask no questions, and above all offer no contradiction.

Now, I have never been superstitious; though some of the wisest men I
have met with seem at times to be so; and I laughed at all this stuff
of Tabby’s, although I had found her truthful. Then I asked her to go
through it all for me; but she stared at my stupidity; “As if her would
come nigh me!” she said. “It is the love as does it, and the angels to
the back of it.”

But when she kept on so about it, and assured me that much wiser people
than I, and a long sight better—as she was good enough to say—had tried
this plan and been set up by it; I began to think that it could do no
harm, and if it afforded her any pleasure—why, no one else need hear
of it. Except that the sin of witchcraft is most strongly denounced
in the Bible; and many might think that this proceeding savoured of
that character. However, if the Church of England could be brought to
sanction it, the Powers of the air might do their worst; for our church
is built upon a rock.

The Rev. Peter Golightly said, when I opened out this case to him, that
he was a little surprised to find me listening to such nonsense. I told
him that it was very far from my desire to do so; but if it was likely
to ease the minds of others, it might be my duty to go on with it. At
this he laughed, and did not say, but seemed perhaps to mean it, that I
was not bound to make a fool of myself, because my brother fools wished
it. However, I was not going to be argued down about it; and I put the
question point-blank to him, whether there was any sin in it. He could
not say that there was any; but being more on his mettle now, declared
that it was rank folly, and insisted very strongly on the superiority
of prayer. There I had him on the nail; for what was this but a mode of
prayer, invoking also those holy writers, who alone have taught us the
use of prayer? He shook his head, as if unconvinced; but his daughter
called him away just then, and I did not care to renew the subject,
feeling that now I had his permission; which he might recall, if argued

The moon was full at six o’clock in the morning, as Uncle Corny said;
and he always knew everything about her, except the weather she would
bring. And at noon I went to my dear wife’s frock, the one she had
worn on the very day before she disappeared from me. She had kept them
on a row of hooks—for we were not rich in wardrobes—with a scarf of
something drawn along to keep the dust from settling. It had been one
of my sorest jobs to unhang them very reverently, remembering when she
had worn them last, and how my arm had been round them. For she had a
very pretty way of coming up in the morning (when her hair was done,
and her collar on) for me to tell her how she looked, and to see that
all her strings were right But now these empty dresses lay, all folded,
and locked in the bottom drawer.

I may be soft beyond most people—although it is a fault more shared
than shown—but when I had spread that simple frock upon the bed, which
I never entered now, and passing both hands down the bosom, clumsily
searched (as a man must do) for the mouth of the little pocket, and
then could only get three fingers in—all the strength of my resolve to
be quite firm and manly quivered on my lips, and melted in the haze
that crept across my eyes. A tiny notebook, with a pencil, and a silver
thimble, a little house-wife, and a button meant to be sewn on my coat,
two or three jujubes (which she kept to pop into my mouth, because she
fancied I was hoarse sometimes) nothing for herself, but all for me, or
for my service; and then a little scrap of paper, my last scribble from
the garden—“Darling, not till nine o’clock”—as I took them one by one,
all seemed fragrant with her sweetness, and holy from her loving hand.

I could not bring myself to go through Tabby’s rigmarole that night;
for my mind was full of larger thoughts, neither would I go upstairs
into the lonely bedroom; but I gazed for some time at the moon, as
people when in sorrow do, by some mysterious instinct. And then I
placed a pillow, instead of the roll of mat beneath my head, and under
it my dear wife’s house-wife, and her pretty thimble, not for that
night only, but as my companions henceforth; and therewith I cast
myself on the hard church-cushion, and thought of her. Before very
long, I fell asleep, having done a good day’s garden-work at sundry
jobs that were sadly in arrear.

But Tabby’s jingle was still in my head, moving without my will or
wish, as a mouse comes in the wainscote; and with the moon shining into
the room, one of my last reflections was that I had been very lucky in
yielding to no witchcraft. Not that there could be anything to frighten
me in my darling, “whether white, or whether red;” by which the old
chant seemed to mean, whether she might be in the bloom of health, or
the wan hue of the winding-sheet. In either case she would love me
still; and that was the thing I cared most to know.

Suddenly, I sat up and looked. The old church clock was striking
slowly, and the sleepy sound loitered on the drowsy air. The moon was
gliding calmly on her southern road, and being in her humble summer
state, she could scarcely top the big pear-tree which stood before my
window. The room was full of light and shade, in bars, in patches,
and in triangles, with no strong contrast in and out, but fused, like
silver-wire netting, or water parted by the weir-posts, and rejoining
under them. And there, in this faint flow of light and wavering ebb of
shadow, I saw my Kitty, sitting calmly, and gazing at me steadfastly.

No surprise or fear whatever crossed my mind—which seems to show that I
was not altogether wide awake; but I waited for her to say something,
while she kept on looking at me. I had left off wearing a nightcap
ever since I went to Hampton School; not that I ever slept there, but
because the boys had laughed at it. My Uncle Corny always said that
this was tempting Providence; and now I tried to put up my hands, but
they would not go, and I sat and gazed, being a little surprised, but
not amazed, as some people might have been. Then Kitty put up her hand
to me, showing the palm of it quite rosy, as it always had been; and I
saw that her dress was the one in the drawer; but that did not surprise

“Darling, you must be patient still. I am thousands of miles away from
you;” she spoke as quietly as if she were saying—“The tea is not quite
drawn yet,” and I received it as quietly. “There is a good reason for
my going; and you know it better than I do. Only, be happy till I come
back; for whatever you feel, I feel. When I come home, we shall never
part again.”

This was a little too much for me, high and tragical as it seemed.

“I want you now. Oh Kitty, Kitty, don’t run away again!” I cried; and
over went both my Windsor chairs, as I sprang up, to fling my arms
round her.

But when I came to the place where she had been, lo, there was no one!
Everything was cold and hard; instead of her soft warm figure, all I
embraced was a kitchen towel; and the handle of a gridiron came between
my vainly opened lips.



NEVERTHELESS, that vision, if it was a vision, cheered me. The more
I thought of it, the more I felt that it meant something; and though
free as any man can be from human superstition, here I found a special
mercy, showing that I was not quite abandoned and forsaken. But I took
good care not to make myself the laughing-stock of any one. Neither
Uncle Corny, nor Henderson (who was now come back from his honeymoon),
nor even Tabby Tapscott, who might well claim the best right of all,
ever heard a word of it. To Mr. Golightly alone I spoke at all about
the matter, and he, instead of laughing at me, took it very gravely.

“It is meant to encourage you,” he said; “and you should be thankful.
Many even of the true believers have their doubts, as is natural,
whether our little earthly course is guided by a higher hand; or
whether in the light of full instruction we are left to work it out.
But I venture to think with the men of old, that all things are
ordered for us. You have had a bitter trial, such as befalls very
few so young; and you have borne it well, my friend. Sometimes you
have been gloomy and downcast, but never bitter. A more mysterious
affliction I have never witnessed, and you know well how my heart is
with you, though I seldom speak of it. ‘Bear and be strong’ is the true
watchword, and you have kept it nobly. I pray that I may live to see
you in your happiness again; and you may without presumption hold that
this has been vouchsafed you, as a token of approval, and a signal to
encourage you.”

So I tried to take it, though it seemed but meagre comfort. And I
wished that I had broken my knees again, before I jumped up in such
haste, and spoiled the chance of learning more. My darling seemed
to have finished; but if I had only waited, very likely she would
have begun again, as women generally do. Of geography I had little
knowledge, except as taught at a grammar-school, and then it went some
three inches down the “World as known to the ancients.” I doubted
whether the south of France could be “thousands of miles” from Sunbury,
though that might be a poetical expression, and no lady is expected to
be accurate. And what was meant by the declaration, that I knew better
than she did the reason of her quitting me? That looked as if I had
done something wrong; and an inspired vision should have known that I
had never even glanced at any other woman. Thinking of all this, I was
puzzled, almost as much as comforted.

In the next thing that occurred I found a further element of puzzle,
but none at all of comfort. It was now the usual thing for me, being in
bachelor condition, to turn into my Uncle Corny’s house, at the time
he was having his early dinner. Not that it mattered much to me; only
that I was able thus to save myself from bread and cheese, and secure a
little nourishment.

I was doing this to the best of my ability, without observing it,
when in came Tony Tonks, as if he was running away from the bailiff.
One of my firm convictions was that thin men never panted; but that
impression, like all others, now required revising. Tony Tonks was in
such a state, alike of mind and body, that neither could at all work
out the meaning of the other.

We happened to have a little bit of boiled beef and young carrots; and
my uncle was just helping me to a scutcheon of gristle at the corner.
For he liked to keep a level cut, and he found me fitter now than he
was, for the horny places. But Tony was in such a state, that when his
knife and fork were laid, he said, “Not a bit for me, sir.”

My uncle looked at him as if he were troubled with his ears again, as
he had been last winter. “Certainly, a nice bit,” he said; “and close
to the bone accordingly. We buy it fresh, and we pickle it. At this
time of year, the butchers make it leather with saltpetre.”

Tony saw that his face was stern; and to escape acrimony, he took my
plate with all upon it that should have been for my inside. To this
sort of thing I am too much accustomed to remonstrate.

“Not a word, till you have finished,” my uncle spoke decisively;
“I have known a man who cut his throat, by talking too much at

Mr. Tonks looked not unlikely to commit this error; but after yielding
to my uncle’s orders he seemed better. Then he crossed his knife and
fork, which is a very defiant thing to do, and said as if he shot a pea
at us—“I am come to throw up my appointment.”

My uncle did not speak at first. When people took him suddenly, he
would not be disturbed by any contagious gush of suddenness. And he
waited for Tony to go on, instead of being pushed by him.

“What I mean is”—Tonks continued, seeing that he might as well go
slowly—“I have done the best I can; and there is nothing more to
be made of it. I can make out all about a horse, because he is
straightfor’ard. But about a man is a different thing; and I shall go
back to my business.”

“Have you been frightened?” asked my uncle, looking at him steadily.

“Not a bit of it. What is there to frighten me, or any one? In the eye
of the law, we are all equal. The man who killed me would swing as high
as if he had killed Prince Albert.”

“But that would not bring you back to life. You have been frightened,
Tony Tonks; and it is useless to deny it.”

“Well, my life is as much to me as the greatest man’s that ever lived.
‘Frightened’ is not the proper word. Only I look things in the face,
and weigh the rusk against the risk; and I find the last come heavier.
And I am wanted now for the Leger nags. I am worth ten pounds a week at
least, so I wish to say good-bye to you.”

“I call you a coward, and a sneak,” said my uncle, getting his wrath
up; “and it serves us altogether right for dealing with such a fellow.
I could not bear it from the first; but I listened to other people, as
I am always much too apt to do. You won’t have your spy-money, I can
tell you, for any day since Saturday.”

“Ah, but I’ve got it,” answered Mr. Tonks, who seemed well accustomed
to reproaches; “it was paid in advance, you must remember. I have
cashed it, and mean to stick to it.”

“I don’t quite see how that can be,” said my uncle, with great
sagacity; “you must be making some mistake. You can never have got so
in front of us.”

“Ah, but I have, old cock, I have. All expenses paid; and here is my
five-pound note, as safe as eggs.” He tapped his pocket, in a manner
quite unworthy of an experienced tout.

“Very kind of you to show us. We will have it back.” My uncle seized
him by the waist, and planted him on the table. “Leave him to me, Kit.
He won’t hurt me, and I won’t hurt him, if he is quiet.”

He pinned the spy’s arms with one of his, and took the note from his
waistcoat pocket, while the poor man struggled vainly. Then he set him
again on the floor, and said. “You should learn to be more just, my

“Highway robbery!” shouted Tonks.

“High table, you mean,” said my uncle.

“I’ll fetch the police. I’ll give you in charge. I’ll take out a
warrant. I’ll—”

“You won’t do anything of the sort. Sit down, and reason quietly. You
have broken contract; and if you were one of my workmen, I would pay
you nothing. But as you are a poor little jackanapes, and did your best
for us, I believe, until you got into this blue funk, you shall have
half of this money, Tonks, to pay your way back to your proper work.
But only on one condition—that you tell us what has scared you so.”

“Well,” answered Tonks very sulkily; “I always do what is fair and
right. But you can’t expect a man to go with his life in his hand, to
please you. Fact of it is I got into grief by following up that Migwell
Bengoose, or whatever his name is. I told you that I was bound to do
it, before Downy went to see him again, unless I could get any chance,
you know, of seeing what was in that packet. And I got no chance at all
of that, though I did my best in Bulwrag’s rooms, whenever I went to
see him. But his hand, in spite of all the doctor’s work got swollen
as big as a horse’s head pretty nearly; and his temper became that
frightful, that I scarcely durst go nigh him, and of course there was
nothing to watch, when he could scarcely get about at all. Naturally
I did my best to make something out of his grumbles; but he would not
have it, and at last he says, ‘Bowles, what the devil are you always
after me for? It ain’t from friendly affection,’ he says, ‘and I can’t
pick up anything now, you see. If you want to spy into family affairs,
I’ve got one hand left,’ he says, ‘and that’s enough for you.’

“Well, that was pretty plain, you know. And worse than that, in comes
the doctor, and says he will not answer for his life, unless he goes
into some place where he can be properly nursed and tended. So Downy
makes his mind up in two minutes, gives up his rooms in Dover Street,
and goes back to Bulwrag Park, as they call it, for his mother to
coddle and comfort him. And there they’ve got a hospital nurse, and a
wheel-chair, and I don’t know what all; and much too grand of course
for me to go near with a binocle. ‘You’d better come and see my mother,
Bowles, when you want any further information,’ Downy said to me, with
his frightful grin, like a yellow mangle-wuzzle, ‘ah, she does like
answering questions—light and sweetness, that’s her nature!’

“So I was shut off, as you may suppose; and I pretty soon found out
what made him so suspicious. He discovered somehow that I had been
living, for the first week, you know, not afterwards, at good mother
Wilcox’s place near by, and they look upon her as an enemy, no doubt,
having been nurse to the young lady they have stolen. If you try any
more watching work up there, you must not make that the head-quarters,
for they keep a look-out there, you may depend. But I don’t see what
more you have now to watch. The lady is out of England, you may take
that for certain; most likely she is snug in some lunatic asylum, or
nunnery perhaps, or monastery”—Mr. Tonks was not well versed in such
matters—“either in the South of France, or somewhere on the Continent;
and unless you can lay hold of Downy Bulwrag, and put him on the rack
(as they do in Spain) until he squeaks out all the truth, there’s no
chance of your being much the wiser. I mean, of course, unless she
escapes, or comes to herself, or whatever it may be, and tells you all
about it with her own lips; and that is not very likely. They know what
they are about, a great deal better than you do.”

“Because they are scoundrels, and we are honest men,” said my uncle,
making the little room resound; “it may take a long time, but we shall
win, and grind them beneath our heels, sir. You have seen as much
robbery, Tony Tonks, as any man yet created. Now don’t deny it, don’t
falter with it; but speak, as you will have to speak that day, when you
go where lies are useless. Have you ever known cheating prosper?”

“Better than anything else in the world. You can’t get on without it,
Mr. Orchardson.”

“You know what I mean. Don’t play with words. Does it prosper in the
long run?”

“It would, if they only knew when to stop; but that is just where the
difference is. An honest man stops in good time, you know.”

“An honest man never begins,” said my uncle; “but it is no good talking
to you, Tonks. You have got corrupted altogether. Well, what did you do
about Bengoose?”

“Ah that’s just the point, that is. Says I to myself—‘Now the coast is
clear, and I’ll have a turn at that fellow. Downy is laid up with his
mammy, and I’ll get to the bottom of that affair.’ So I set off last
night, with a pistol in my pocket, one of those Colt’s revolver things;
for I knew it was a bad place, and they might not stick at trifles.
And sure enough, they didn’t, as you must acknowledge. I came up very
quiet, and knocked gently at the door and said ‘Cluck!’ as the fellow
gave the ticket. It was opened very civil, and I asked for Migwell
Bengoose, and the man said ‘All right, just wait a minute.’ A little
dark place it was under the stairs, and I did not much like the look of
it; for I could hear a lot of voices further on, and they seemed to be
drinking and card-playing. However, I sat down where I was told, and
began to think over my story. My plan was to tell him that the Captain
was ill, and had sent me to say that the papers were all right, but he
would like to know how he got hold of them, and where he could get the
others that were mentioned in them, and to pay him a sovereign, just to
keep things going, till the Captain should be about again. The fellow
would remember seeing me with him, and I had made up a very nice tale
of it.

“But the smell of the place was something awful, worse than all the
bookmakers put together, and there is plenty to spare when you get
among them. Either that, or something else, made me feel quite heavy,
and I began to doze a little, though I fought very hard against it.
And all of a sudden, before I could jump up, there was a leather strap
round me, and my arms were buckled in it, as tight as you had me on
the table, Squire; and a deal worse than that, for I was fastened to
the chair, with a dollop of some stinking stuff across my eyes and
mouth, so that I was blind and pretty well choked. Then my legs were
tied together as tight as any hayband, and in that way I was left, I
shall never know how long, to listen to a lot of blackguards laughing.
There were women cackling too among the hooting of the men, and they
cried ‘Cluck, cluck, my noble cock!’ and the worse I tried to rave at
them the better they enjoyed it. Then they searched me, and took all my
money, and my pistol, and threw me, chair and all, upon the floor, and
whacked me on the arms and legs with a towel knotted up.

“I thought my last moment was come; and it would have been, if I had
not shammed dead, and rolled over against the wall, where I got a
little air, by rubbing the sacking against it, for I could not get my
hands near my mouth. Then they began to talk in some thieves’ lingo,
which I could not make head or tail of. But the upshot was that they
released my face, and gave me some horrible stuff to drink, and let
me lie there the Lord knows how long. I would rather die straight off
than have such another night, for I saw great holes in the floor, and
expected to be pitched down, and never come up again.

“At last a big fellow came and untied me, and pitched me out of the
cellar-flap. ‘Had enough of cluck, cluck, haven’t you, old chap?’ he
said as he banged the door behind me. And I found it was daylight, and
I was in the court where I hid behind the truck from Downy. I was in
such a state that I could scarcely crawl; but a good-natured coster put
me on his barrow, and took me to Drury Lane, and there I found a cab. I
never saw Bengoose all the time; but no doubt he had arranged it all,
under orders from Downy Bulwrag. If you don’t think I have had enough
of this job, I do, Mr. Orchardson.”

“Show your legs,” said my uncle, with a smile in which there was not
too much compassion; “I don’t wish to be hard upon a man in trouble;
but you are given to romance a little, by your own account, friend

“Never to my employers, sir. But look here!”

His poor little drumsticks had plainly been acting the part of the
drum quite recently, and were painted of divers colours, while a broad
stripe showed where the ligaments had been.

“I have a better opinion of you, Tonks, than I ever expected to have,”
said my uncle. “You are a plucky little chap. Here’s your five-pound
note, for you have earned it. It was your fault that I took it from
you, because you defied me. Now go back to your proper work. And if
ever you come this way, look in, and I will give you a good dinner.”



WHEN any man has once got into a racing state of mind, it is not fair
to his bodily health to keep him in a wheatfield. Sam Henderson had
been expected, by his bride and her female relatives, to walk about in
country places, and sit on stiles, and admire the moon; like a young
man from Whitechapel coming to feel his way to be a teacher. Sam had
borne it pretty well, as a thing not likely to come twice, till he
found it too much to come once. For he was not of my quiet nature; and
still less could it be supposed that his Sally was like my Kitty.

He went off to some races at York, I think, or somewhere nicely
convenient, for they were on the eastern coast; and he offered, as
fairly as a man could do, to let his bride come with him. But she said
she saw too much of horses at home, and preferred to remain with her
landlady. He thought that she was too independent, and she thought the
same of him; but they soon made up that little matter, and came home to
Halliford as affectionate as need be.

Sam was beginning to boast about his condition prematurely. If any
friend of his replied to his sudden invitations—“Sam, I should be
most delighted; but it might be inconvenient, you know, to Mrs.
Henderson”—Sam would look at him with a laugh, and say—“The best soul
living, my dear boy. Always proud to welcome any friend of mine, at any
time. We pull together, and no mistake. You may come with your coat on
inside out, and she won’t say a word, till I do.”

To this I listened very gravely, knowing what a good wife is, but
doubting whether it can be wise to take such liberties with her. And I
knew that Sam was a pleasant fellow, partly because of his bounce and
brag. Whatever belonged to him became pure gold or glittering jewel; as
there are Oriental gems, which glow at the touch of the owner. Nobody
had such dogs or horses, nobody had such clever men; and now we were to
believe that no one had ever owned such a wonder of a wife.

“Let us go and see how they get on,” I said to my Uncle Corny, when
a grand invitation on gilt paper was brought by a man in a pink silk
jacket, riding a horse full of ringlets; “‘Mr. and Mrs. Henderson beg
to be favoured with the company of Mr. Orchardson, and his nephew Mr.
Christopher Orchardson, at dinner at half-past six o’clock on Tuesday,
the 12th instant.’ And look at the top in gold letters, uncle—‘Prince’s
Mansion, Halliford!’”

“Prince’s Mansion!” cried my uncle; “get my specs, or I won’t believe
it. Well, there are fools in this world! I knew they had got into that
old ramshackle house, that was let to some foreign fellow, who bolted
from his creditors. Prince’s Mansion! Oh my goodness! Why don’t they
say—Windsor Castle? You may go, if you like. But you don’t catch me.
And half-past six! I couldn’t wait till then. It’s too late for dinner,
and too early for supper. You go and see them, and say I won’t come.”

“But it must be answered on paper, uncle. And you must never say you
won’t come, you must say you can’t.”

“I am not going to tell any lie about it. I can go well enough, if I
choose; but I don’t. You suppose that I don’t know how to behave. I can
behave as well as the best of them.”

“You have got a blue coat with brass buttons,” I said on purpose to
irritate him; “it was all the fashion twenty years ago; but I am afraid
you have got too fat for it.”

“You are getting horribly cheeky, Kit. You are catching it from that
Henderson. What would Kitty say, if she were here? There, I never meant
to vex you, lad. I’ll go, if that will please you.”

When the great day came, my uncle looked as well as the very best
of them. He had an old Sunday coat let out, for he would not buy a
new one, and he wore his big watch with three gold seals, and black
silk stockings, and knee-breeches. Also he had a velvet waistcoat,
double-breasted with coral buttons, which he had bought for my
wedding-day, and a frilled shirt, and his white curls brushed in
a very becoming frizzle. “A’ look’th like a bishop,” old Tabby
pronounced, though perhaps she had never seen one; “but no bishop han’t
got such legs as thiccy.”

Aunt Parslow, as an old friend of Sally Chalker, was invited specially,
and came over in style with a pair of horses, and her dinner-dress
done up in a long silken package. She called at my uncle’s on her way
to Prince’s Mansion, and they laughed so that I was surprised at their
manners, considering who was to feed them that day. But perhaps they
felt no gratitude before they got it.

It was a good step to Sam’s house, for Prince’s Mansion stood in the
upper part of his grounds, nearly half a mile from his “Doctor’s Shop,”
as he called the place where he had feasted me, and where he had been
content to live. Though the days were now getting short again, and our
road led away from the village, it was likely enough that we might come
across neighbours, who would be astonished at my uncle’s appearance,
and could hardly fail to run home, and publish throughout the village
that the grower was out of his right mind at last.

To save any difficulty about this, we sent for Sims and his ancient
fly, and putting up the windows, went in state to the dinner at
Prince’s Mansion.

My uncle had been positive and almost snappish, in asserting his
knowledge of the world; and I had given him credit on the strength of
that for knowing almost everything. But now he showed signs of some
anxiety and doubt, as we passed through the gate at the beginning of
the drive, and he glanced at his nails, which were of a steady brown,
and his knuckles, which resembled door-knobs.

“There won’t be any ladies, of course,” he said, “besides Mrs. Sam and
Aunt Parslow. Just look to my collar, this side, Kit. It seems to cut
uncommon hard.”

“Ladies?” I replied; “why, there’ll be a dozen, according to what Sam
said yesterday. There are three Miss Chalkers, Sally’s aunts, and three
Miss Kempes, her cousins, and Mrs. Spry from Tonbridge Wells, and three
or four racing ladies, and a very fashionable one, and very beautiful I
believe, whose name is Lady Kickloose. So you see your velvet waistcoat
won’t be wasted, Uncle Corny.”

“If I had known this, I would have stopped at home. Why I shall have
one on each arm! I like people to talk with that I know all about.
By-the-bye, I forget—which arm is considered the most polite to walk

“It does not matter much. But you will do very well, if you don’t begin
to tell any of your long stories. People won’t have them now. All they
care for is what they call general conversation.”

“If I am not allowed to tell my old stories,” my uncle replied
indignantly, “all I can do is to hold my tongue. What is the good of
bits and splinters? You can’t make anybody laugh like that. You must
take your time, and let them think what’s coming. It’s just the same as
carrying a pint of beer. If you are jogged on the elbow all the froth
runs over. I give a man his time, and I like to have my own.”

“To be sure, and they’ll be glad enough to listen to you, when
they have had their own talk out. But one thing I want you to do
particularly. You are so sharp in seeing everything. You observe so
much better than I do.”

“Well, you can’t expect to be equal to me yet. Though you are not a
fool, Kit; not half so much a fool as some who think they are mighty
clever. What is it you want me to notice, my boy?”

“Why, I want you to notice particularly how Sally behaves to her
husband. To hear him talk, one would suppose that he had got a perfect
jewel—a model of a wife that worships him, and would crawl on her knees
to please him. In fact, you would think she was fifty times the wonder
that my Kitty was. But from what I know of Sally Chalker, I don’t
believe a word of it.”

“Ha, ha! Jealous, is it?” he answered most absurdly. “I’ll keep my eyes
wide open, Kit, and report accordingly.”

Sam Henderson was a most hospitable fellow, and not a single word
shall pass my lips which might be twisted by captious persons into a
reflection upon him. He sat at the bottom of his table, and he never
took his eyes from the plates on the right hand and the left, except
when he was calling Tom, his groom to change them, or to fetch them
that he might put more on each. Even Lady Kickloose, who was a very
lovely woman, could not make demand keep pace with the quick abundance
of supply. Hence it was the more unreasonable, and I might even say
despotic, on the part of the new Mrs. Henderson, that she kept on
calling down the table—“Sam, look at father’s plate, he never will mind
himself, you know;” or—“Sam, can’t you see that Aunt Maggy has not got
a morsel?” or—“Mr. Henderson, Lady Kickloose has never had one drop of

“All right, my love. Beg pardon, I am sure. Tom, why don’t you move a
little quicker?”—poor Sam Henderson would reply. But I thought it was
not “all right, my love,” that a man who was doing his best for us all,
and getting but a snap or two for his own mouth, should be hurried and
flurried in this sort of way, and almost accused of inattention to his
guests. I could scarcely help saying—“Do let him alone;” but I knew the
proprieties too well for that.

“You are right, ma’am; she does look beautiful,” I heard my uncle say
to one of the three unmarried aunts; and then he gazed at her with as
much admiration, as if she had been—no matter who, but some one very

And I was pleased to see a large piece of greens drop from his mouth
into his grand breast-frill, which put him out of countenance for half
an hour. In my poor opinion, his admiration was as much out of place as
that piece of greens, though I will not deny that our hostess was what
is called a very fine young woman. She wore a dress of green satin,
which I never could endure any more than Kitty could; and the way it
was cut below the neck and shoulders filled me with surprise that Sam
allowed it; but perhaps he could not help himself. I was glad to see
Miss Parslow looking shocked, and I glanced at her and then at it, but
she did not think fit to comprehend. Uncle Corny on the other hand
surprised me by treating it as a joke rather than a scandal; gentlemen
wore cut-away coats, he said, and why should not ladies wear cut-away

Presently I happened to catch some words from the lower end of the
table, which drew my attention from Sam’s wife, and brought it back to
my own affairs. The dinner was a very good and solid one; not fifty
varieties of unknown substance, such as we too often meet with; and
yet quite enough of change for the most inconstant person. There was
very nice white soup, and mock turtle—not the real, such as my Aunt
Parslow gave, but quite as good, if not better—then a cod of great size
and high character, with oysters as fat as mushrooms; and after that
a saddle of mutton at one end, and an aitch-bone, not over-boiled, at
the other; one lying down, and the other standing up. Foreigners may
disguise their stuff, which by their own confession requires it. But an
Englishman likes to know what he is at, that his conscience may go with
his stomach.

These things are trifles, in a way of speaking; but if they lead up to
a pleasant state of mind, it is not friendly to neglect them; and my
Uncle Corny, who had kept himself to bread and cheese at his proper
dinner-time, was rejoicing, as a just man does, in the victory of his
merits. Such joy is generally premature; if he had only known what was
to come, he would have thrown down knife and fork, and waited.

For as if by magic, there appeared, in front of Sam himself, and almost
making him look trivial, the most magnificent bird that ever alighted
on any table. I asked a young lady what it was; and she said—“The swan
of the Romans.” It did not become me to contradict her; but I thought
that the Romans must have owned a breed of swans superior to ours, for
this one had a peacock’s tail spread out. Everybody looked at everybody
else, while Sam turned his cuffs up, and sharpened a new knife.

“Round with the champagne, Tom! We will drink my wife’s health.” As he
spoke, he had his eyes upon the peacock’s tail; and rude as it was, all
the company laughed.

A pair of large tongues had been put before me, and as I began to carve
them, I heard a lady say—“No fear. Downy will be flush of money now. Be
down on him sharp; that’s the way to do it.”

“Are you sure it will come off?” asked the gentleman she was talking
to; and I saw that it was Mr. Welch, a great man of the ring, speaking
earnestly to Lady Kickloose.

“What is to prevent it? The fatal day is named. It is too good for him,
as everybody says. But you know where marriages are made.”

“And where they end, with a fellow of that sort. But I can’t take it
down—even now I can’t. Such a lot of brass, you know, my lady! And what
has he got to show for it?”

“Brass—and his mother;” replied the lady, who had picked up the pithy
style of the turf. “The old Earl is a duffer. Mother Bull can walk
round him any Saturday.”

“Yes; but young ladies have wills of their own. It is out of my line,
but I have always heard that Lady Clara could have the pick of England.
What can there be in Downy, to fetch her so?”

“How can I tell you, Mr. Welch! Such things happen continually. All we
have to do is to follow them up. I never liked the man; but that is no
reason why she shouldn’t. Bread-sauce, I suppose goes with peacock.”

Sam was in his glory all this time, and the dinner went on very
merrily, with plenty of laughing, and glasses clinking, and even the
most demure ladies smiling. My uncle, who had cherished a pure contempt
for sporting men, began to think better of them, and more and more as
his opinion was asked, delivered it on subjects he had never heard
of. Aunt Parslow also was exceedingly good-natured, and held a very
interesting talk with a lady who had heard of her father. And I took
the opportunity, before we went away, to remind Mrs. Henderson of our
old doings, when she was the belle of Leatherhead; and I thought that
she looked at me very nicely, and felt very deeply for my present sad
condition; and after all I could not contradict my uncle, when he
said—with five and sixpence in his pocket, which he had won by very
fine play at whist—that we had been treated most handsomely and kindly,
and if he should be asked to their Christmas dinner, he meant to make a
point of going.



BUT what I had heard about Downy Bulwrag rooted itself more and more in
my mind. Since the departure of Tony Tonks (who would never have been
invited to that grand dinner, for even racing people must draw the line
somewhere), I had made up my mind to go and see the arch-enemy, as soon
as ever he should be in his proper health again. And with an eye to
that, I had written to Mrs. Wilcox, requesting her to let me know of
his first re-appearance.

It was not my desire to fall upon this villain, at a time when he could
not defend himself, for I did not intend to mince matters with him, if
once I could come to close quarters. And even of those who insist most
strongly on the Christian duty of forgiveness, and look down from the
greatest height upon the littleness of resentment, probably few—if they
cared to speak the truth—would have put up with things as I did.

It was all very fine for the people to say—“Take it easily, my dear
friend. With patience, and the will of God, you will find everything
come right; and by-and-by, you will be surprised at your own excitement
about it.”

The thing that surprised me most of all was my own power of endurance;
and sometimes I felt quite hot inside, at having two strong arms, and
doing nothing with them. “It was not thus you won your Kitty, but by
knocking down Sam Henderson,” the springy part of my conscience said
sometimes to the spongy half of it; “if you let rogues have their way,
you are only a rogue yourself, and a coward.”

This reproach I did not deserve. No fear of bodily harm to myself had
crossed my thoughts for a moment; but the dread of some reckless act
had been perpetually with me. It was easy enough to do violent things;
to cut myself off for ever from all hope of love and happiness, without
much chance of even learning the secret of my misery. The enemy I
feared, in the burst of pent-up fury, was myself.

I began to forget this discretion now. That the man, who had ruined
my life to gorge some filthy spite of his own, should now jump up in
the world, and crow, and dance, with gold in his pockets, and love in
his arms, while I lay a widower on two chairs; that he should have
grins on his vile yellow face, while my Kitty was weeping her eyes out
somewhere; and that every one should take it as a thing of course, and
praise his sagacity and worship him—if justice had broken her beam like
this, what law could there be to bind any one? The scoundrel had come
to gloat upon my sorrow; I would just return the call, and have a word
with him.

Fearing the loss of my self-command, I took not even a walking-stick,
nor the true Briton’s mainstay, an umbrella, although the day was
showery. Neither did I change my working-clothes, but without a word to
any one, saddled old _Spanker_, and started directly after breakfast.
In an hour, I dismounted at the door of Mrs. Wilcox, and gave the sharp
boy my horse to lead about.

“Whatever can be the matter with you, Master Kit?” his mother inquired
very kindly. “You don’t look a bit like yourself, sir. Do come in; I
have got a sight to tell you.”

“Thank you; when I come back will do. I am going to pay a little
call—not more than half an hour.” Before she could answer, I was out of

“When I rang and knocked loudly at the door of the old house, a man
servant came, and I was glad of that; for I could not have forced my
way past a woman.

“I wish to see Mr. Bulwrag,” I said.

“Never sees any one at this time of day. He has not finished breakfast
yet,” answered the man.

“It does not matter. I must see him. I have heard that he is quite well

“Oh, yes, he is well enough;” the man gave a smile, which meant—a great
deal better than he deserves to be—“but you must call again in the

“Thank you. I intend to see him now. Show me the room, if you please,
my friend.”

“That is the room. But you must not go in.” He offered no resistance,
when he saw that it would not stop me; and I knocked at the door, and
then entered.

Donovan Bulwrag wore a dressing-gown, braided with gold, and was
lighting a cigar, after making (as the dishes showed) a long and goodly

“Holloa! Who are you?” His tone was rough and arrogant; but I saw by
his eyes that he knew me, and his heavy mouth was twitching. “What the
devil do you mean, by coming in like this?”

“Are you in your usual health and strength?” I would not have touched
him, if he had answered, “No.”

“To be sure, I am. But what business is that of yours? I always kick
insolent cads out of the room.”

“I will not foul my tongue with any words to you. My business is to
lead you three times round this room, by the nose. Now try to stop me.”
As I spoke, I was putting on a gardening glove.

He struck at me with all his force; but I dashed up his fist with
my left hand, while with the right I got a firm grip upon his bulky
nose. In vain he let fly at me, right and left; I did not even feel
his blows, though the marks were plain long afterwards. Then he tried
to grapple me; but I would not have it. Three times round the room I
led him, while he roared and shrieked with pain, and then I flung him
backward into his easy chair.

I cannot say how I was enabled to do this; and I doubt whether any one
can explain it. But before I felt the difficulty, it was over; and I
was fit to do it again, if needful.

Downy Bulwrag had never been amazed before, because he was a
cold-blooded fellow; and that made it all the worse for him, when he
could not avoid it. I am thankful to the Lord—who has always guided me,
when I do not depart too far from Him—that this happened so; for my
heart was up, and my brain had not a whisper left in it. Life and death
are mere gossamer, at such moments.

On the table lay a long sharp ham-knife. If Bulwrag had said a word, or
even stirred, he would never have done one or other again. That knife
would have been in his heart. And I—well, the gallows and the devil
would be welcome to me afterwards. He saw my eyes dwell on that blade,
and he was cowed. He knew that he had a madman standing over him; and
happily for both of us, he fell into a faint.

“Blackguard,” I shouted, “you have had a narrow shave. This comes of
meddling between man and wife.”

I seized the long knife, while he pawed with his fat hands, and flung
it just clear of his big yellow head. The blade cleft the panel of
black oak behind him, and quivered, and rang like the tongue of a bell.

Without another word I left him thus, flinging the door of the room
wide open, that every one might see his condition. The footman, or
whatever he called himself, fell back against the wall, and let me
pass, which was the only wise thing he could do. Then I walked away
quietly, and found my horse, and declining all talk with Mrs. Wilcox
rode back to Sunbury with a great weight off my mind.



SO far as my experience goes, it has never been an easy thing to find
a man in whom the sense of justice is adjusted perfectly. That is to
say, not overdrawn, nor strained to a pitch that is at discord with
all human nature; neither on the other hand so lax and flabby, that it
yields to every breath, and has no distinctive tone. Therefore I cannot
expect to be approved by everybody for my recent act; but the glow of a
tender conscience told me that I had not behaved amiss.

Yet the remembrance of my own rage, and utter loss of self-command,
frightened me more than I can express, for a single word, a look, a
gesture, even a flicker across my own will would have made me then and
there a murderer. What a thing for Kitty to hear—if ever she should
hear of me again—that my unhappy love of her had been cut short by the
hangman! I formed the sensible resolve to keep out of Bulwrag’s way
henceforth, unless he should come to seek me; and then his blood must
be on his own head.

At first I did not tell my uncle of that brief but hot engagement,
because, as I came to think about it, the folly of it dawned on me.
For the fierce enjoyment of a minute, I had sacrificed all hope of
tracing such faint clues as we had won, and I had shown the arch-enemy
in the most palpable form, my suspicions of him. This was unsound
policy, and I was loth to confess it yet, lest my chief friend should
be discouraged, as well as angry with me. However, the whole thing soon
came out, and with so much more tacked on to it, that I was forced to
recount the simple facts. But instead of being vexed, as in my opinion
a truly wise man must have been, my uncle shouted with delight, and
shook his thick sides with laughter.

“So you pulled his nose! Kit Orchardson pulled the nose of the future
Lord Roarmore, and the son-in-law of the Earl of Clerinhouse! Show me
how you did it. This is too fine!”

“No. I scarcely pulled his nose. I cannot be said to have pulled his
nose. All I did was to take him by the nose, and he came after it

“I see, I see. He just followed his nose; and a lawyer could prove
that there was no assault. A man follows his nose without assault or
battery. Well, I never thought you were so clever, Kit.”

“Because I never boast,” I answered calmly; and it struck him for the
first time that this might be so.

“What will he do?” he asked; “whatever will he do? He can’t very well
put up with it; and yet how can he get satisfaction? You wouldn’t fight
him, I suppose, even if he deigned to ask you.”

“I never thought of it. Let him try. He has done the wickedness. What I
have done is nothing.”

“Well, I think it was something good—the very best thing you could have
done; much better than knocking him down, or even cow-hiding him, as
the Yankees say. How your Aunt Parslow will be delighted! She is coming
over here to-morrow. You know what you put into her head. She will call
on the parson again about it. The poor girl is very ill; worse than
ever. I hope he will agree to it.”

“Aunt Parslow seems very fond of Sunbury now,” I replied, with a
curious glance at him; “why should she always be coming over here so?”

“You had better ask her. I daresay she can answer for herself. You must
not expect to pull everybody’s nose.”

It had lately appeared to me, more and more, as if my Aunt Parslow
were beginning to set her cap at my Uncle Corny; or rather—to put it
more politely—as if he were doffing his wide-awake to her—a wide-awake
proceeding, no doubt, on his part, and a proof of capacity on hers;
but not a thing at all to my liking, nor in any way savouring of those
lofty feelings which are so essential to wedlock. And without any
mercenary motives whatever, or even a dream of self-seeking, I had felt
(with good grounds for it) a delicate and genial interest in my dear
aunt’s affairs. If after countless years of single blessedness, she
thought to double the rest by a joint-stock company, all I could do was
to wish her well, and hope profoundly for her happiness. There were
few better men than my Uncle Corny, and no woman better than my Aunt
Parslow; and they might rub on together rarely, if each would let the
other rub, fair turn and turn about. But I feared that they scarcely
had the give-and-take for that, and being both of strong metal, it
would come to groans and sparks.

Nevertheless I must put up with events; and the little inquiry I had
offered, as above, had not been received with gratitude. The surest way
to bring this wild idea into fact, would be for me to show opposition
to it. But I knew that Aunt Parslow was still romantic, as all women
of true nature are. She had felt her own love affairs in early days;
but she would not want to think that Uncle Corny had felt his; and
I resolved to let her hear of them by his own sighs; if he could be
brought to sigh about anything but markets.

When she arrived the next day, I saw that she was in fine spirits.
But a little ashamed, as it seemed to me, of the exceedingly spirited
dress she wore, quite as if she were going to the races. Moreover, she
had brought _Jupiter_, as if to introduce him to some one who might
influence his future life; and at this I ventured to express surprise,
in a friendly manner, and with my hand upon his head.

“Oh, he does love a change, and it does him so much good!” she
exclaimed, as if she had been in her teens; “and I should like to hear
what Mr. Orchardson thinks of him. He is a good judge of dogs, you

Alas, if one ever tells a story, how quick it is in kicking up its
heels! In charity, I had said something of the kind, when I wished to
make goodwill between them. Here was _Jupiter_ come to prove me a liar,
and perhaps to sway my destinies.

“Don’t get out with that lovely dress on,” I said very craftily. “Let
us go down to Mr. Golightly’s; I know that you want to see him. I will
jump on the box, and show coachy the way. It will save you a lot of

Accordingly we drove on to the parson’s, and I went in to announce
her. She had called upon him twice before, and he liked her, and was
grateful for her good intentions.

He received us kindly; but we could see that his heart was in nothing
he was talking of. He looked most sadly worn and thin, and his eyes
fell every now and then, as a short low cough came from another room.

“And how is your sweet Bessy?” Miss Parslow asked; “you know she is
quite an old friend of mine. What a favour you could do me, if you only
would! I have taken such a liking to her.”

“And she to you. I will go and fetch her. I fear you will find her
looking very little stronger.”

“Call this furniture! I call it hardware,” my aunt said in a low tone,
when he had left the room; “no wonder the poor girl is all bones. Now
back me up, Kit, about Baycliff. It is your prescription, you remember.”

It was as much as my aunt could do, being of a very kindly nature, to
keep a smile upon her face, when the sickly girl came towards her. And
the father looked from one to the other, and tried to make some little
joke, but his eyes were sparkling with something else.

“You know what you promised me, my dear, if your good father would
allow it;” Miss Parslow stroked her silky hair, and looked into her
soft eyes, as she spoke; “and now everything is arranged and settled, I
am sure you will not throw me over. The rooms are taken, and I cannot
go alone; it would be so miserable for me. Your father will come to
see you every week, and you shall teach him to catch prawns. And where
do you suppose it is? Not at any strange place at all, but a place my
nephew knows quite well, and the very same house that he was in. And he
would come down, and be near us.”

“Oh, that would be nice. I should not feel strange. Kit is so kind and
gentle to me. I like to be where Kit is.”

She came and placed her thin hands in mine; for I had become like an
elder brother to her. She knew of my sorrow, and I of hers. It was not
this world that she grieved to quit, but her father all alone in it.

It was a terrible pain to me, and almost more than I could bear, to
find myself in this lovely place, without any love to respond to it.
At every turn there was something to recall, at every view of gliding
boat, or breaking wave, or flitting gull, some memory of a trifle said,
and misery of having no one now to say it. But for the good of others I
was forced to put these fancies by, for we could not have found another
spot so suitable for the poor sick child. And as it proved, there was
something even here to compensate me.

It had not been thought worth while to take any lodgings for me in
the place, as I could not be spared throughout the week from the busy
fruit season at Sunbury. Whenever I found time to run down to Baycliff,
I could get a bed at the inn, and spend the day with my aunt and her
delicate charge. This suited me also much better, because I did not
like to be long away from the neighbourhood of London, where, as I
always felt somehow, the strange mystery of my life must be cleared up,
if it ever were so.

Mrs. Perowne was a very nice person, and deeply interested in our
affairs. Kitty and I had lodged with her for a week, and although we
could not afford to take her best rooms, she treated us exactly like
first-floor people, and would have kept us for nothing, as she assured
us, if only she could have afforded it. And now it rejoiced me to do
her a good turn, by inducting my aunt at three guineas a week, which
was nothing for her to think twice of. Six of the Leatherhead dogs
came down for the refreshment of their systems, and Miss Golightly was
delighted with them, and spent half the day on the sands scratching
their heads. The weather was all that could be wished, for we were come
to the end of September now; and the summer as a whole had done its
utmost to atone for the atrocities of the year before.

Mrs. Perowne and Miss Parslow now were as good friends as any two
people can be, with money coming weekly between them. And they never
spent less than an hour a day in talking of my loss and wondering.
Till it chanced that the landlady called to mind a little thing that
happened after we had left her, and to which she had paid no attention
at the time. But my aunt considered it of some importance, and begged
her to tell me all about it, the very next Saturday I should come down.

“Well, Mr. Kit,” she said, upon the Sunday morning, for, I had been
too late on Saturday to see them; “it may have been a week after you
were gone, or it may have been no more than one day, but at any rate
there came to this house a very quiet gentleman, not over young, about
fifty you might say, and not over tall, but about half-way between
five feet and six feet, and he asked for you—Mr. Orchardson by name,
and then the new Mrs. Orchardson. And when our Jenny told him that
you were gone, he sighed, Jenny says—though you never must be certain
of anything that Jenny says—just as if he had lost his pocket-book.
And then he asked for me, and he was shown up here, the drawing-room
floor being vacant, as you may remember; and I came up to see him,
but I happened to be a little flustered, about having all the house
on my hands so. And when I found that he was not even looking out
for lodgings, perhaps I was a little short with him. But whether or
no, he did not push on with his questions as some people do. But he
took up his hat, and begged me to excuse him for intruding upon my
valuable time, and away he went with a very solid walk, and I was sorry

“But what was he like? Can you at all describe him? Even his dress
would help a little.” I thought it most likely that this was the
man who had come for my Kitty in Philip Moggs’ boat, and taken her
doubtless in Clipson’s cab from Shepperton to Woking Road.

“I think I should know him, if I saw him again; but I won’t be
quite sure,” replied Mrs. Perowne; “he was a gentleman I should say
decidedly, though not in a fashionable cut of clothes; and I think he
had gray hair, though I won’t be sure, because so many people have that
now. He looked highly educated, and his voice was very nice, and he
wore a broad hat with a cord to it.”

“Why, it must be the Professor himself,” exclaimed my aunt; “according
to all I have heard of him, and according to your description, Kit.
He came to see how you were getting on, and whether you and Kitty had
fought yet.”

“Oh, that reminds me of a curious thing; and I thought it so odd,” said
the landlady; “he did seem to think that you must have quarrelled, or
at least that there was something unpleasant between you, I remember
now that he did quite well, because I was astonished at such an idea.
For if ever there was a young couple suited—intended by the Lord for
one another—”

“It cannot have been the Professor,” I broke in, “for the simple
reason that he must already have left the shores of England. We had a
telegram from Falmouth proving that. And her father would never for a
moment have imagined that Kitty and I had fallen out already. What did
this man say, to show that he supposed it?”

“Well, I don’t know that he did exactly that; but he inquired
particularly about your health, or rather I should say your state of
mind, as if you were not quite—you know what I mean—as if you were
rather flighty, sir.”

“Well, and so I am,” I answered smiling; “a great many people would
have flown off altogether, if they had been through half what I have.
And now this again is another wicked puzzle for me. The only thing
certain is that I shall never find it out. I always come just a bit too
late. I hear of a thing when it is no good. I inquire of people, when
they have forgotten everything.”

This was rather rude of me; for Mrs. Perowne had done her best to
assist me; and she could not be blamed for not talking by the hour with
a stranger, about her late lodger’s affairs.

“Did he say what he meant to do?” I asked, for really all these things
were very tantalizing; “did he give you any idea why he should take
such an interest in us? Did he ask where we were? Did he mention my
uncle? Did he go on, as if—”

“I am truly sorry, Mr. Kit, I am indeed. But I can’t tell you another
thing about him. And I am not sure that all I have told you occurred.
Some of it may have come out of my own head, I can’t carry everything,
I can’t indeed.”

Mrs. Perowne was almost crying, and it was plainly useless to question
her further. Such is evidence, even with people who are not fools, and
who do their very best. Yet in a court of justice, an unhappy witness
is badgered and insulted by some brazen-headed fellow, who could not
tell a tale himself in its true order, if he had just read it in a

The only conclusion I could come to was that Mrs. Perowne’s visitor and
the passenger in the boat and cab, who had taken my wife away, were one
and the same person, acting no doubt under Bulwrag’s orders. But why
he should have shown himself in the first case plainly, and made his
second visit in that furtive manner, was more than I could even pretend
to explain.

Another thing which I could not explain was of a different and
delightful order. Rejoicing in the sea-air and in the sea itself, Bessy
Golightly grew stronger every day. The wan delicacy and waxen clearness
began to flush with a rosy gleam, her eyes looked darker and yet full
of light; and her lips instead of drooping at the corners crisped their
pretty curves with a lively smile. Miss Parslow was as proud as a hen
that has struck an ant’s nest, and took her to the china shop every
day to be admired, and to the station to be weighed. And whenever her
father came to see her, with “six hours allowed at the sea-side,” he
spent all the six in looking at her.



“POSSIBLY I might do something with him,” said Mr. Golightly to me one
day; “I have not much power of persuasion; but if I put a few simple
truths before him, and showed him the wickedness of his present course,
and how wanton is the injury he has done you, without even the shadow
of good to himself, he might try even now to make amends. I can easily
get an introduction to him. I suppose you would forgive him, if your
dear wife were restored. It would be a noble thing to do.”

“Too noble for me, I greatly fear. But he will never forgive me. If he
hated me, when I had never harmed him, what is he likely to do now?”

As yet I had concealed from this conscientious pastor my recent act of
rudeness, for I could not expect him to look upon it as the discharge
of a Christian duty. But now it seemed better that he should have the
story from me, than from some one who might give an unkind turn to it.
And he sensibly perceived that as the thing was done, it was useless
now to remonstrate.

“It was not a magnanimous act at all,” he replied with a grave shake of
his head; “but allowance must be made for provocation; even Mr. Bulwrag
must feel that, if he has at all a candid mind. I should not let that
discourage me in the least, if you think fit to accept my services; and
after all your kind acts to me and my dear child, it would be a very
happy day for me—one of the happiest of my life, if I could really help
you. Let me try, I entreat you; it can do no harm, and it may do good.”

“You would only expose yourself to rudeness. He is rough and
contemptuous in his manner, and has no respect for any one.”

“His rudeness would not injure me. But I do not think that he would
show any. I am well acquainted with a cousin of the lady whom he seeks
to marry. He was my churchwarden at Knightsbridge, and I became much
attached to him. Mr. Bulwrag, for his own sake, will not be rude to any
one so introduced.”

This of course made a great difference; and as Mr. Golightly pressed
the matter, I consented gratefully, though without seeing even the
smallest chance of any good to come from it. However, it would enable
me to hear something of that scoundrel, after whom I now began to feel
a sort of stupid hankering; such as the young robin has for the cat; or
the mallard on the mere about the strange proceedings of that dog among
the reeds.

A more unpromising embassy might no man ever undertake; and having
still some pride alive, in spite of deadly blows to it, I begged my
reverend, and revered, as well as much beloved friend, to understand,
and to make it understood, that he went as no envoy of mine, but simply
at his own suggestion. “That shall be plain enough,” he said, “he shall
not even know that I asked your leave.”

It must have been a strange and curious thing to see this encounter of
two men, as different as any two men can be, and as far apart as heaven
and hell. Not having been there, I cannot describe it; and I could
not have done so, if I had been present. But from what was told me
afterwards, the result was much as follows.

Donovan Bulwrag received his unknown visitor politely. He offered him a
cigar, but whether in sport or courtesy was not plain, and then he said
with his usual slowness, leaning back in his chair, and thinking—

“Sunbury, I think Sir Gilbert says; Sunbury a pretty village on the
river. I know it a little, but I ought to know it better; for my
mother’s family lived there. And an aunt of mine—Miss Coldpepper—must
be one of your oldest inhabitants. But owing to family circumstances,
we do not see very much of her. How is she? I hope she supports the
Church, as all people of property should do.”

“The Church requires no support”—Mr. Golightly was always annoyed at
the idea of the Church being patronized; “except what she has from
above, Mr. Bulwrag, and from the proper zeal and gratitude of her
dutiful children.”

“To be sure. That is exactly what I meant. I trust that my aunt is a
dutiful child. But I know with sorrow that we do not all value our
privileges, as we should. You find that the case sometimes, I fear.”

“Too often, I regret to say, I do.” Mr. Golightly was always grave with
any one who spoke gravely. “But we do not restrict the opportunities
of doing good to parishioners. We have many useful institutions in our
parish. Perhaps you would like me to mention a few. And if with your
very kind feelings towards the Church, and anxiety about your aunt’s
discharge of Christian duties, you should feel impelled to contribute,
I happen to have the subscription-lists of six of the most meritorious,
all in urgent need of funds; and I carry the receipt-forms in my

Downy was caught in his own net very neatly, and the parson heard him
mutter—“Confound that Sir Gilbert. This is a little too bad of him.”

“Ah, I don’t quite see. I am sure this is most kind of you—but with the
many claims upon my small resources—perhaps it would be better to allow
my mother the benefit of this opportunity.”

“You must not blame Sir Gilbert. I did not come upon a begging errand.
I intrude upon you for quite a different purpose. A sad and most
mysterious thing has happened in our parish.” Mr. Golightly watched
him closely, to note the effect of every word. “A lady newly married
to an excellent young man, of one of our oldest families, suddenly
disappeared last May, and has not since been heard of.”

“You need not tell me that. I know all about it,” Bulwrag replied
without any change of face, but in quite a different tone, and speaking
quickly. “I could not help knowing it, considering that the girl’s
father was my mother’s husband. She married without our knowledge, and
is gone without it. My mother, who has been most kind to her, never met
with such ingratitude.”

“I do not intrude into family matters. I have nothing to do with that
part of the case. I am here simply to discharge my duty. I come by
nobody’s suggestion. Only as the clergyman of the parish I feel myself
bound to do all I can, to restore peace and happiness, and to right a
great wrong.”

“It is very good on your part, and I wish you all success. It would
appear to be rather an affair for the police. I am sorry that I have an
important engagement. Would you like to see my mother on the subject?”

“No, thank you. My business is with you. I will speak plainly, and as
an old man to a young one. All who know of this mysterious affair,
believe that it is of your doing. Hear me out, and without anger, as I
speak. If from some ill-will to either of those two, or for any other
reason of your own, you have contrived to part them, be satisfied now
with what you have done. For many months now, you have caused the
deepest misery, doubt, suspense, and almost despair. You have crushed
two young hearts, which perhaps never will recover. You have desolated
a simple, innocent, and tranquil home. Remember, I beseech you, what is
manly, good, and just. I will not urge religion, because perhaps you
have little sense of it. But even so, you know how short our time is
here, and how paltry it is to injure one another. Even now, if you will
do what is right, I will pledge myself that you shall be forgiven. Your
share in it shall not be published to the world. You will have had more
revenge than the bitterest foe can long for, and you will escape the

The clergyman urged that last point, because he saw whom—or rather what
he had to deal with—a thing that could not be called a man. For during
his description of our misery, he had detected a glow of fiendish
exultation in the crafty eyes he was observing. This proved to him more
clearly than if he had seen the deed, that the guilt lay on that brutal

“It is a sad loss to us, my dear sir,” replied Bulwrag, looking at him
steadfastly; “that we have not the privilege of living in your parish.
Not only for the sake of the deep interest you feel in the private
affairs of your parishioners, but also because you possess very largely
that extremely rare gift—eloquence. I should be trembling in my shoes,
if I had anything to tremble for. But knowing no more than you do, and
perhaps much less, about this strange affair, I am simply astonished at
your waste of words, and if you were not a clergyman, I should say—your

“I have never been charged with impertinence before. Even if I am
wrong, there is nothing of that about it. But if I have been mistaken,
I have done you much wrong as a gentleman; and I will beg your pardon,
if you will do this. Take a sheet of paper, and write these words—‘Upon
my honour as a gentleman, I have had nothing whatever to do with the
disappearance of Kitty Orchardson. Signed, Donovan Bulwrag.’”

“It would be easy enough to do. But I do not choose so to degrade
myself. If you think again, you will see that you were wrong, in
proposing a thing so disgraceful. If you will not apologize without
that, I must even put up with your insult. I believe that you are a
good man, Mr. Golightly, and deeply attached to your parish, sir; but
impulsive, and hasty, and illogical. A fault upon the right side, no
doubt; but too hasty, sir, much too hasty. I must beg you to excuse the
same fault in me—for I cannot wait another moment.”

When Mr. Golightly came back, he declared that but for that glow in
Bulwrag’s eyes, he could well have believed in his innocence. For he
had never known any one meet a charge, when conscious of guilt, with
such entire self-possession, and unfaltering readiness. And he feared
that there was no such thing as mercy in his composition.

“He is a foe to be dreaded, Kit,” he continued, looking at me sadly.
“There is nothing, however bad, that he would stick at; he is resolute,
calm, and resourceful. I have met with some men—not very many—in the
course of my work as a clergyman, who seemed to have forgotten and
foregone all the good, all the kind, all the tender part of the nature
which God has given us. St. Paul describes such beings—one can scarcely
call them human; and so from a different point of view does Aristotle.
It is useless to deny that they exist, although one would like to deny
it—people in whom there does not remain one particle of good feeling to
appeal to. Yet according to memoirs of some great Christians they have
been such at one time. I will not deny it, though I have never known an
instance. It is possible that by the power of Grace such an one may be
converted and live, as a brand snatched from the burning; but—”

“But I hope Bulwrag won’t be so at any rate. And I don’t think there is
much fear of it. I hope that he will have his portion—”

“Hush, Kit, hush! I pray you not to imitate him. Why is he as he is,
but from indulging the evil part in early days, and famishing the
better side? But I have brought you some news of your father-in-law,
the learned and good Professor Fairthorn. You have looked in vain, I
think, in that scientific journal, as it seems to be called, which you
took in on purpose. I saw this quite by accident in _The Globe_ as I
came home; and although it cannot help you, I thought you might like to
see it.”

He handed me the paper, and I read as follows, among the short
paragraphs of news received that morning:—

“The steamship _Archytas_, as our readers may remember, proceeded on a
cruise of investigation and deep-sea soundings last April or May, being
fitted out specially for that purpose by a well-known learned society.
Our Government, with its usual penurious system, has left all these
questions of prime importance to our commerce and intercourse with the
world, entirely to private enterprise; and we acknowledge with shame
that we never could have laid a cable across the Atlantic, without the
knowledge for which we are indebted to the broader and more enlightened
policy of the United States. Unhappily these are now involved in an
internecine struggle, which must retard for many years the progress of
civilization; and we think that England owes a debt of gratitude to the
learned association, which has thus stepped in to man the breach by
voluntary efforts. Some uneasiness had been felt concerning the safety
of this gallant band, which is under the charge, as we need not say,
of one of our most distinguished savants, the well-known Professor
Fairthorn; for no tidings of the _Archytas_ and her gallant company had
reached this country for many months. But we are happy to announce,
in advance of our contemporaries, that the exploring ship was spoken,
in latitude and longitude not decipherable on the telegram—for it can
hardly have been 361, and 758, which are the apparent figures—by the
clipper-ship _Simon Pure_, which arrived at Liverpool last night.
The _Simon Pure_ took letters from her, which will be received with
avidity, also instructions that any letters for the members of the
expedition should be addressed to Ascension Island, if posted in Great
Britain before the end of November. We hope to give further particulars

Without loss of a day, I took advantage of this opportunity, but
rather as a matter of duty, than of hope or promise. And as my letter
led to something, I will venture to insert it here, though a very
old-fashioned production.

    surprised and shocked to hear that shortly after your
    departure, your daughter Kitty, my dear wife, left
    me apparently of her own accord, without a word of
    explanation, or any cause that I can even imagine. We
    had lived in perfect happiness and love; no cross word
    had ever passed between us; instead of growing tired of
    one another, we had become more and more united. I am
    well aware that the home I could give her was not such
    as she, with all her attractions, might have aspired
    to. But she knew that, before she married me; and to
    all appearance she was perfectly satisfied, and as
    happy and lively as the day is long. And we had every
    hope, with kind friends round us, of improving our
    condition from year to year. And I say, on the honour
    of an Englishman, and on the faith of a Christian, that
    never, in thought, word, or deed, had I wronged her, or
    been untrue to her. In short, she was all my life in
    this world, and I loved her even to infatuation, and
    fondly believed that she loved me likewise.

    “Yet on the evening of May 15th, 1861, when I returned
    to our cottage, at the time arranged, and in full
    expectation of finding my dear wife, she was gone
    without a single word; and from that day to this,
    although I have sought, and others have sought high
    and low, not a trace of her can be obtained, except as
    mentioned afterwards, and not a line has come from her.

    “It is the deepest mystery I have ever heard, or read
    of; and when it will end, God only knows. She was much
    too sensible, and pure, and loving, to have left me
    thus for any trifle, or for the sake of any other man.
    Sometimes I fear the very worst,—that she may have met
    with some fatal accident, or have been decoyed away and
    killed. But who could do that to my innocent Kitty?
    Surely not the vilest man ever born. My suspicions rest
    very strongly on a person well known to you, Donovan
    Bulwrag; but I cannot bring it home to him.

    “We believe that we have traced my wife, after a search
    of many weeks, to Woking Road Station on the London
    and South-Western Line; but there all further clue
    vanishes; and we cannot identify, or even guess at the
    elderly man, who appears from our inquiries to have
    taken her thus far. My uncle Cornelius Orchardson, and
    my aunt, Miss Parslow of Leatherhead, have spared no
    pains or expense, in helping me in my hopeless search;
    but nothing comes of it, and I almost despair.

    “I need not ask you, if you know anything which can
    throw any light on this horrible puzzle, to write to
    me immediately. But my hopes are very faint, because
    you were far at sea before it happened; as was proved
    by your kind message, received from the captain at
    Falmouth, which my dear Kitty read with me, and for
    which I beg to thank you.

    “With all good wishes for your success in the
    important work you are engaged on, and hoping for your
    speedy return, I am with all respect and love, your
    unfortunate son-in-law,

                                “KIT ORCHARDSON.”

After finding out how much it would cost, I posted this letter with my
own hands; and the gloomy winter closed upon me, with nothing but its
dreary round of heavy ponderings and lonesome work.



“A DISCONTENTED and sour man,” said my Uncle Corny, one Saturday night
when I had dropped into supper, “is as likely as not—unless he prays to
God every morning of his life—to turn into a Liberal. I have known a
lot do it, and being nabbed on the nail by the shady lot who are always
near the corners, never get any chance again to come back into honesty.
Kit, is that sort of thing going on with you?”

“Not likely,” I answered, for my principles were sound; “is it likely
that I would join a party including Lord Roarmore and his grandson?
Conservatives commit no outrage.”

My uncle considered that statement gravely. He was too large-minded
and candid of nature to accept it without the support of fact. He was
probing his memory, to see if this were so.

“Well,” he said at last, “there is some truth in it, though it seems
at first sight to go a little too far. I have known many very tranquil
Radicals, and one or two Tories of an energetic turn. All I feared was
that you might be driven by the vile wrongs you have suffered into
that miserable frame of mind, when people are hatched into Radicals.
They injured me, not quite so much as you, my lad, but bitterly, very
bitterly. Yet I carried my principles sound through it all.”

“Oh, uncle, you promised to tell me the story of the wrong done to you,
in your early days. I have often longed to hear it; but was afraid to
ask you, because of the trouble it has been to you. But if you could
bring yourself, without feeling it too much, to tell me how that matter
was, it would be a great satisfaction to me, and do me a lot of good, I
do believe.”

“Well, my boy, it is a frosty night. How soon the year comes round
again; though I do not think we shall have a winter fit to compare with
the last one. But the east wind is coming up the lane pretty sharp, and
we are likely to have a week of it. Let Tabby take the things away, and
bring another log or two. You had better come down here, if the frost
goes on. You will get frozen up there all alone.”

“Not I. I can keep the fire up, and I believe it is warmer up there
than here, because of the wind from the river. How glad I am Bessy is
still at Baycliff. They never feel the cold wind there. But go ahead,
uncle, according to your promise; I don’t know how many times you have
cheated me. Tabby, look sharp, and go home before it snows now.”

“Well, you must put up with my in and outs. I can lay a tree in
straight enough, but I am out of my line telling things. And you
wouldn’t believe, to see me now, that I was ever a brisk young chap,
proud of the cut of his boots and breeches—for we used to wear no long
slops then—and blushing at the mention of a pretty girl, and wondering
what they were made of. But though you would not think it now, nor
anybody else, except the young women that are dead and gone, I was
quite as much the swell of Sunbury then, as you were before you fell
into your bad luck; not so tall, of course, but I daresay quite as
strong, and the master of any lad about the village.

“Somehow or other, I was like you too, and your father as well for that
matter, in not making up to any damsel in the place; although they
were pretty ones then, I can tell you, as pretty as any of the young
ones now, and prettier too to my eyes, and ever so much modester and
more becoming. But the queen of the neighbourhood, in my opinion, ay,
and of the county, too, was Myra Woodbridge, the daughter of a farmer
near Bedfont, who held land under Squire Coldpepper. If I was to tell
you what she was like, you would think I was trying to put you out of
all conceit with—with almost everybody in the world. And her looks,
although they were so sweet and gentle, were not the best part of her,
or not the only good one. A kinder-hearted, truer-hearted maiden never
lived; and you could talk to her by the hour, without her being tired,
or you either of what she had to say.

“Naturally enough, all the young men round about were hankering after
this fair maid; and it did not go against her that her father was well
off, having made a deal of money in the great war-time, by contracts
for fodder for the troops, and so on. Myra was his favourite child,
and pretty sure to come in for a good share of his wealth some day.
She could play the piano, and sing like an angel, and talk French, and
keep accounts, and do anything. The difficulty was for me to get near
her, till I thrashed a young miller from Uxbridge who annoyed her, and
then I thrashed two other fellows who were after her, for they never
summoned people for such little matters then; and that made her begin
to think kindly of me; and we used to walk by the brook, every Sunday

“All was going on quite as well as I could wish, and old Robert
Woodbridge was quite coming round to the coaxing of his lovely
daughter, and the banns were to be put up just before the grass
was cut, so that we might have our wedding-day between the hay and
wheat—when suddenly everything was thrown abroad, and both our lives
were spoilt for ever.

“Give me the sugar, Kit; I did think I should have some one to mix for
me, in my old days—a faithful companion of many years, or perhaps a
daughter or a grandchild. But God’s will be done. It is useless to take

“Squire Coldpepper’s daughter, Monica, the younger of the two very
handsome ladies, had taken a violent fancy to Myra; and now, when her
elder sister Arabella was carrying on, against her father’s will,
with that dashing young buck—as they called them then—the Honourable
Tom Bulwrag, Miss Monica, who never cared much for her sister, any
more than two firebrands rubbed together, she must needs send for my
sweet Myra, to come and stay at the Hall, for some purpose of her own,
whether to plot against her sister, or be company for herself, or what
else, I cannot tell.

“Myra was very loth to go, for she knew the tempers she would have to
deal with, and having a right pride of her own, she could not bear the
way they treated her, partly as a friend, and partly as a servant—for
she might not have meals with the family—and partly no doubt as a sort
of go-between, or what they call a buffer nowadays. And being a mean
lot, as everybody knows, their practice was to make her earn her keep
by sewing and doing handy jobs about the house, like a servant without
any wages. But whether she liked it or not, she must go, for her father
durst not disoblige his landlord, that peppery Squire Nicholas.

“Unluckily, while she was in the house, that strange thing happened
that I told you of. Tom Bulwrag was to have run away with the elder
girl, Arabella; but when everything was ready she burst out about some
trifle, and I am blest if he didn’t make off with the other; thinking,
I dare say, how sweet she was for taking his side in the shindy. It
was out of the frying-pan into the fire, and served him right, said
everybody. If the elder was a firebrand, the younger was a Fury; and
which is the worst, I should like to know?

“But they might have fought it out between themselves, and no harm
done to good people, if Miss Monica had not carried Myra Woodbridge
with her. She was forced to have some one perhaps, for her own sake,
little as she cared for opinion; but one of the servants would have
done as well, or better if she had been older. How Myra allowed herself
to be taken, I could never quite understand, for it was not likely
to help her father in the good graces of his landlord. Perhaps she
thought herself in duty bound to stand by the one who was fond of her,
or perhaps she hoped to see that things came right, and thought there
might be a worse mess of it with no one of common sense to help; at
any rate she went off in the chaise, and never had chance to come back

“You can understand what a storm there was at the Manor, when the truth
came out. Our Miss Coldpepper had been locked up, and could not get out
till they found her; and then she was in such a state of mind, that
she could not speak her meaning clearly. The runaways had at least
six hours’ start, and it was hopeless to go after them; and in those
days there were only coaches, no railways, and no telegraphs. Squire
Nicholas swore himself into a fit; and it shortened his days, as the
doctors said, though he vowed he would live all the longer for it.

“Myra was of a gentle nature, as a woman should be; yet proud to resent
any charge against her, when she knew she was innocent. The obstinate
Squire, a pig-headed man, put all the blame upon her, or pretended to
do it, to screen himself and his own lazy ways with his daughter. Till
any one who listened to him would believe that the whole thing had been
devised and carried out by a daughter of one of his tenants. So that
when she wrote to her father—for the others left that job to her—to say
that they were all at Bath, and doing as well as could be expected,
Squire Nicholas sent a most thundering message, through old Robert
Woodbridge, that Myra had better never come near Bedfont, or he would
have her in prison for conspiring. Of course this was rubbish; but it
frightened the poor girl, and made her doubt what justice was.

“Then she wrote to me, a most pitiful letter, begging me to think the
best of her—as if I could think anything else—saying how sorry she was
for leaving home in that impulsive, foolish way, under a mistaken view
of right. Some day perhaps you will have a letter of that sort from
your Kitty. And she asked me, as she could not ask her father (who
would not forgive her till he saw her), to oblige her by just sending
money enough to bring her back to Bedfont. ‘I came away with only half
a crown, and there is none to be got from you know who’—the poor thing
said, for she was most careful not to write names that might lead to

“But like a woman, exactly like a woman, who thinks that the whole
world knows everything about her, or else is afraid of their doing so,
the only address that she gave was ‘Bath, in the County of Somerset.’
It was hard to send money by post in those days. You must enclose and
risk it. But what was the use of putting money in a letter directed to
‘Miss Myra Woodbridge, Bath’? There was nothing more precise in her
letter to her father, and it took me three days to find out that, for
the old man was gone from home on business. I went to Squire Nicholas,
to see if he knew, but he only stormed at me, and told me to go to—a
place he was fitting himself for. So that four days were lost before I
could start, with your grandfather’s leave, for the west of England.

“When I got to Bath, it took me two days more, as an entire stranger in
the place, to find out where the Bulwrags had been stopping. And when I
discovered their hotel at last, they had left it on the day before, and
no one could tell me what their destination was. I came back to Sunbury
in very bad spirits, fearing greatly that I never should see my dear

“And so it turned out; although I had one more letter from her, which
was enough to break any one’s heart almost. I have it upstairs, but I
shall never show it. God only knows what a man goes through. When my
time comes, you will find it, Kit; and I wish to have that, and the
other, with me. There is more than a twelvemonth between the two; and
the second is dated from a German city.

“I could not understand it at the time, because I had no more thought
of any other woman, than you have since you lost your Kitty. Afterwards
I found out the whole. The poor girl became indispensable to them. She
alone eked out their resources, and kept them from going to the dogs,
before Bulwrag learned some roguish way of turning money. And to keep
her from quitting them and going home, they lied through thick and
thin to her, about her father and about myself, and backed up their
lies with forgeries. They vowed that her father would never receive
her; and that I was married to a Sunbury girl. Her father could make
no inquiries about her, for he had been taken with a paralytic stroke;
and her brothers, jealous wretches, did not want her nearer home. As
for me, I could do nothing, any more than you can now. I knew that they
were all upon the Continent, and trusted in her good faith and loyalty,
for many a sad day. And although she had been deeply hurt and wounded
at my silence, which of course had been twisted to their selfish ends,
I believe that she was faithful to me, to the very last.

“The old man died on the very day when I received her second letter,
and I went to his funeral with it in my pocket. The brothers looked
askance at me, and smiled a sour smile, as much as to say—‘You don’t
cut in for any of it’—and I did not even speak to them about their
sister. But they soon came to grief, by the will of the Lord; and the
farm is now occupied by George Fletcher.

“In reply to that letter, which astounded me, I wrote to say that every
word she had heard was false. That I had never forgotten her, as she
supposed (although she did not reproach me with it); that I cared for
no one else, and should never do so, and hoped from the bottom of my
heart, that her illness was not so serious as she believed. If she
would only write that she wished to see me, I would go to her anywhere
in the world. Then I told her of her poor father’s death, and that
he had loved her always, and been yearning for her. She was on her
deathbed, when she received that letter, and it comforted her dearly,
and she died with it in her hand.

“Now what do you think my dear girl died of? It is almost too bad to
tell you, Kit; and I can scarcely command myself to do it. I cannot
prove it. If I only could—but vengeance belongs to the Lord in heaven.
Slowly, but surely, it will fall; and a part is already upon them.
Monica Bulwrag killed my Myra, not on the moment, but by slow death.
That was why she was so scared with you. That is the reason that her
power passes into terror, when she tries to face any of us.

“That scoundrel, her husband, growing tired of his wife, began to pay
attentions to Miss Woodbridge. He began very craftily, for like his
son, he was cunning as well as furious; and the poor girl scarcely
suspected it, or could not bring herself to believe it true. But his
wife, knowing well what he was, saw through it; and you may suppose how
her passion raged. She came in one day when they were together, Myra
standing innocently by the window, Bulwrag gazing at her in his vile
licentious way. That woman lost all self-command, at the sight. She
strode up to Myra, and with all her weight and strength struck her on
the bosom with her clenched fist. Myra fell backward and lay stunned
upon the floor, her head being dashed against the sill as she fell. But
it was not that which killed her; but the heavy blow on the chest, the
most dangerous part of the delicate frame.

“No doubt, she would have left them, if she could, though she might
have to beg her way home again; and she even left the house, but could
not get far. There had been some fatal harm done inside, by that blow
of a brute beast; and the days of the best girl that ever lived were
short in a land of strangers. She had trouble in breathing, and some
fainting fits; a good doctor could have saved her, I do believe. But
those brutes were afraid to have medical advice, even if they desired
it. She pined away, and died. She did not care to live, until it was
too late to do it. But she died in happiness. Thank God for that. She
died with the knowledge that her father had been her father to the
last, and that I had never failed her.

“Well, my boy, it was a bitter time for me; and my heart was full of
fury, as well as anguish. But it is arranged for us, by a Higher Power,
that these crushing strokes come upon us, from a mist. We know not the
manner of their descending, we hope that they are not as they appear to
be, we call up our faith in Heaven’s justice to protect us, and we moan
when it is useless. Nevertheless, for all of that, I believe that truth
and equity are vindicated before we die, if only we live long enough.
And if not, let us be content. We are fitter for another world, than
those who have destroyed our life in this.”

I saw that my uncle had been overdone, brave, and strong-hearted, and
stout as he was. People who complain, can support that habit; and a
habit it becomes, never touching them inside. But he was of a hardy and
courageous fibre; yet now he leant over his long pipe-stem, and his
pipe had gone out, like the vapours of the past.



IT was natural that my hatred of that heinous race should be doubled.
Violence and falsehood in the fiercer times, cunning and falsehood in
these latter days had robbed two generations of honest growers of all
that they valued most on earth. No one, however light and careless,
could help being struck with the strange resemblance between my uncle’s
sad history and my own. It was now quite manifest why he had striven
against my affection for Kitty at first, and then when he saw that it
could not be checked, had sympathized with me in the dark results.
His wrongs must be avenged, as well as mine; and the sweet repose of
Christian contentment must not be indulged in, till justice had been
fed. The fatal point was that I could see no way; but the way was being
paved for it, without my knowledge.

It was out of my power, and outside my nature, to play the spy upon
anybody; but we managed through good Mrs. Wilcox to keep a sharp eye
upon Downy Bulwrag. I rode up to see her at least once a week, fearing
above all things that he might give me the slip, and be off to some
foreign quarters, possibly even to my darling’s prison. That she was
immured in some out-of-the-way place was now my settled conviction,
and I pondered a thousand wild plans for roaming the world at large
in search of her. The money would have been at my disposal, for Aunt
Parslow was most generous; but where to begin was a boundless question,
and where to end would have been endless.

The only thing possible was to wait; and the thing most reasonable was
to hope, though impatience vowed it otherwise. The spring came back to
a heavy heart, and there was no spring in my voice or gait.

One April evening I went down to the Halliford brook for watercress
for my Uncle Corny’s supper. He had not been very well of late, and
fancied this, or disliked that, in a manner quite unusual with him. I
was uneasy, and begged him daily to seek the advice of Dr. Sippets, but
he only laughed, or bristled up, as stubborn as a rusty nail in heart
of oak. Then I told him not to smoke so much, and he replied by filling
his biggest pipe.

I passed the place where I first had Kitty in my arms, a year and a
half ago. Then all had been storm, and flood, and roar. Now all was
calm, and sunny silence, broken only by the lapping of the brook. I
leaned against the old carved stone, from which she had leaped into my
embrace, and the budding shadows of the alder bush, like bars of sad
music, stole over me. It seemed to me, in my disconsolate mood, that
the young leaf had better spring back into the bud, and the flower get
quickly through its work, and die. But my thoughts were interrupted by
a grating voice.

“Halloa, young man, you look down in the mouth! Not much luck for you
in my house, by all accounts. Ha, that was a scurvy trick?”

I answered not a word, for I disliked the man, an ill-conditioned,
evil-omened fellow—old Harker, who had meant to live rent-free for ever
in Honeysuckle Cottage. He looked very shabby, and shaky, and uncombed,
as if he slept in a hay-rick, and washed himself with it.

“Ah, you wouldn’t be quite so uppish, my brave young cock, if you knew
all that I could tell you. Give my love to old bonfire-raker. Hear
he’ll come to ashes himself pretty soon.”

This was so mean and ungrateful of him, after all my uncle’s
forbearance, that I seized him by the collar, as he stepped upon the
bridge, and brought him back and made him look at me.

“Now, Harker, you’ll just have the kindness,” I said, “to speak out,
like a man, what your meaning is. I am not going to hurt you, if you do
the right thing. Otherwise you shall have a wash, and not before you
want it. Out with it. Out with everything that you can tell me; though
I don’t believe there’s much of it.”

“Very likely not. And I would not say a word of it—such as it is—for
any fear of you; but only because he has treated me shabby. Promised me
five pounds, and only gave me one. That wasn’t arkerate, you know. Why
it hardly paid for shoe-leather. What will you give me, Master Kit, to
tell you all I know of him, and all his tricks about you?”

“That depends upon what I find it worth. In the first place, who is the
he you talk of?”

“As if you didn’t know? Well you are a pretty muff, if you don’t know
when a man hates you. I have no love for you, mind, because of the
scurvy way I was treated; but I would not go out of my way to hurt
you, without being paid for it. What will you give? You will be glad to
know it; though I don’t promise you it will help you much. I am always
arkerate, I am.”

I promised him a pound, if it should prove to be of value, or a crown
if I could make no use of it; and although it could help me but little
for the future, I considered it worth the larger sum, when I had heard
the whole of it; because it cleared up so many little points which had
puzzled me up to that moment. This man Harker, by his own confession,
had been employed for weeks to keep close watch upon us, and report all
our doings to Bulwrag. That demon discovered that this low fellow bore
a grudge against us, because of his expulsion from the cottage; and
what better spy could he wish for than one who had lived in the place,
and knew every twig and stone? It is awful for a simple man (who lives
without much thought, and says and does everything without looking
round) to find that all his little doings have been watched, by an eye
that was anything except the eye of God. We had kept a very distant
sort of outlook upon Bulwrag; but that was different altogether, and
as a rogue he must long have been accustomed to it. To think that in
our gardens (where every tree knew me, and the line of every shadow
was known to me) I could not even move without somebody behind me, was
enough to scatter all delight, and simplicity, and carelessness.

Harker told me all about the secret of the door into Love Lane. I knew
that it was bolted, I was sure it had been bolted, I could almost swear
that it had not been opened by any honest person from the inside, for
a long time before Kitty vanished through it. It ought to have been
locked as well, of course; as Tabby Tapscott (who had the true feminine
knack of hitting a blot) observed. But now all that became plain as a
pikestaff. That sneak of a Harker knew a dodge for undoing the bolt
from the outside, by tapping on a sprung piece of tongued board, when
the bolt (which was loose in the socket) would glide back.

I remembered what appeared to be a pretty turn of Kitty’s, when I asked
her to come and take a walk in Love Lane. “Not unless you seem to want
it, my dear. We have our love inside, and it is not a gloomy lane.” For
she always loved fruit-trees, and fair alleys, and the way one looks up
at the sky through balls of gold.

However, that sort of thing was out of Harker’s line; and I asked
him a few questions, with a sovereign in my hand; at which he kept
glancing, as a dog of better manners assures his master that he loves
the hand ever so much more than the tit-bit inside it. He told me—for
his mind was made up now—that he had suspected Bulwrag’s scheme, but
had nothing to do with the final stroke, except that he had opened the
road for it. I conjured him by all that he valued—if he valued anything
besides himself—to tell me where my dear wife was likely to be now, if
indeed she were in the world at all.

He had no fine feeling to be appealed to, and having had a bad wife—his
own fault, I dare say—could not at all enter into my concern. But he
took a great weight from my heart by declaring that there was no fear
of Kitty being made away with.

“’Tis a bit of revenge, and nothing more,” he said; “the man is so
deep and slippery that you can never circumvent him. You are a baby
altogether to him. Although he employed me for weeks together, he never
let me into any one of his devices. He never does anything as you
expect it. When you find out this, if you live long enough to do it,
you will find it come contrary to all your guesses. If you ask what I
think is the best way, I will tell you. But it might be quite wrong for
all that, you know.”

“Very well,” he said, when I had asked most earnestly, and promised
him five pounds, if it turned out well; “you just do this, and see
what comes of it. Collect all your money, and get your uncle to sell a
good piece of his land for building, they are talking of that sort of
thing, you know; and there is sure to be a railway by-and-by, and the
old Topper’s land is the best in the parish. Then when you have raised
a thousand pounds, take it in a bag, or a purse with open meshes, and
lay it on his table—not too near him, mind—and then be very humble, and
say, ‘Mr. So and So, you have beaten me out and out, and I give in. You
shall have all this, and I’ll cry quits, and give you any undertaking
you require, as soon as I get my wife back again.’ It is my belief,
Master Kit, that you would have her in a week; for that sort of man
will do anything for money.”

This was altogether a new view to me, and I began to suspect things
immediately. Possibly this man had even been sent to propose a bargain
in this sly way. I could raise the thousand pounds, by selling out
what I possessed; and my wife was worth more than all the money in the
world, or even than my own life to me. But my pride, and sense of
right, swelled against the low idea; and I knew that even Kitty would
condemn so vile a bargain.

“If that is the only way to do it, it will never be done,” I answered
sternly; “but tell me one thing—did you see her go? Did you see the man
who came to fetch her?”

“No. It was managed too well for that. They got all they could out of
me, and trusted me no further. I did not even know that it was going to
be done. I was ordered off to Hampton, on that very day.”

Seeing some one in the distance coming towards us from the village,
I gave the man his sovereign, and let him go, after learning where
he might be found in case of being needed. And before I could even
think the matter over, Mrs. Marker was crossing the planks towards me,
dressed very prettily, and smiling at me pleasantly.

“What memories this spot does evoke!” She had taken to rather fine
language lately, and seemed to become more and more romantic. “Oh, Mr.
Kit, Mr. Kit, is it possible that I meet you here again? Alas, I fear
that you seek this spot, to heave the sad sigh, and to shed the briny

I replied that I was only come to look for watercress, but was very
glad to meet her; for we always had been friends, and perhaps she could
tell me many things I wished to know.

“Whatever I know is at your command. My deep and heartfelt but
unavailing pity has followed your fortunes for many a long month. Why
the bridal morn seems but yesterday, so to speak; and yet a rolling
year has passed over us since then! Robbed of your bride in less than
half the honeymoon, and before she understood the price of sugar—you
remember that she was to have laid it in cheap, second whites before it
went up for preserving. Oh, Mr. Kit, we well may say inscrutable are
the decrees of Heaven. But all shall be well yet, all must be well, if
we trust in the Lord, and gird up our loins with trembling. Excuse the
remark if too personal, but my heart does bleed for you. Any new light
shed upon this dark dispensation?”

“That is the very thing I was going to ask you. But first of all, tell
me, dear Mrs. Marker, are you convinced, are you absolutely certain,
that my Kitty would never prove false to me?”

I never put this question to any of my own sex. But it always did me
good to receive from a woman, who must understand women so much better,
the strong confirmation of my own strong faith. To their credit be it
said that not one of them refused it.

“Fie, fie! How can you ever bring yourself to ask the question? Though
I am sure, I am not surprised, after all that has happened. But I will
tell your Kitty of it, and we will have a laugh together. For the
triumph of the wicked cannot last much longer. I suppose you have heard
what the wretch is doing?”

“Not very lately. I was going to ask you. We were told in the autumn,
by a lady who seemed to know, that everything was settled, and even
the day fixed for his marriage with a very rich young lady, the only
child of a very wealthy Earl? But it seems to hang fire, and I cannot
discover that anything is settled even now. Do tell me what you have
heard of it. Miss Coldpepper surely ought to know.”

“I should think she ought, considering what he has done. It appears
that the lady is quite willing; she is under some foolish spell, and
thinks him such a hero. But her father, though he seemed to give in at
first, heard something, which induced him to change his mind. And now
he insists, as is only fair, upon something being brought in by the
gentleman as well. They are doing all they can to get over the hitch.
And what do you suppose he had the impudence to do? He came down here
about a week ago—drove down in a handsome cab all the way; nobody was
to know it of course, but I did; and then and there he had the face to
ask his aunt to declare him the heir, and to bind herself to it, of all
her estates and property. It quite took my breath away when I heard
it—that any one should have such assurance. And after all that has
happened in the family.”

“A nice lord of the manor he would make. Did his mother come down with

“Not she. He was too wide awake for that. The sisters can never be in
one room half an hour without fighting. He went on about the honour of
the family, and adding to the estates with the old Earl’s wealth, and
taking the name of Coldpepper, and I don’t know what else—for of course
I was not there; but she told me of it afterwards, and she laughed
very heartily I can tell you. ‘It is a mere business arrangement,’ she
replied, ‘and it must be done in business form, if at all. Write to my
solicitors on the subject, proposing exactly what you have proposed to
me. Give your reasons for wishing that it may be settled so, and add
that there could have been no occasion for it, if your mother had not
run away with your aunt’s lover, after locking her in a dark hole where
she might have died. You may be quite certain of my consent, as your
mother was, when she turned the key on me. Don’t let me detain you, for
fear of losing time. Solicitors are never very rapid in their work.’
He could scarcely have been disappointed, but Charles said he did look
savage, when he showed him out. And now, what do you think his next
card is?”

“How can I tell? Perhaps he’ll come to Uncle Corny, and ask him to sell
his garden, and settle it upon him.”

“You are not so very far out after all. Your Kitty has a very rich aunt
in the north—no relative of his in any way, not even a connection,
for she is related to Kitty on her mother’s side. But she has the
reputation of being rather soft, and so off he goes without telling
anybody. But we heard of it; we hear a great deal more now; because
we’ve got a maid whose sister lives there, and waits upon the two
young ladies who are always chattering about their brother; and our
Mary can’t do without her Anne, for more than a week, because they are
twins. Every Sunday our Mary goes up to the Park, or their Anne comes
down to the Manor. And perhaps you may know what ladies’-maids are,
Mr. Kit. They really seem to take a deeper interest in the family they
serve than the one they belong to. So we know all the young ladies
know, and perhaps more than their mother knows; for being so masterful
she has things kept from her, as is only natural. And I can tell you
one thing, Mr. Kit, which you won’t be sorry to hear perhaps, or at
any rate didn’t ought to be. Mr. Downy Bulwrag is in more trouble; not
about money I mean, but something worse, or at any rate deeper than
money is. His sisters know this; but they don’t know what it is, or
else they are afraid to speak of it.”

I thought of Tony Tonks, and the man called Migwell Bengoose, who
appeared to Tony to be an English sailor, fallen into foreign ways; and
I thought it very likely that he might have brought bad news.

“He goes away at night,” continued Mrs. Marker, “without a word of
notice to anybody, and he sneers, or is grumpy, if they ask him about
it; and he has been seen with very shabby-looking people, though he
used to be so particular about that. And he carries one of those
new-fangled pistols, that go off a dozen times with one load, and every
one is afraid to go near him almost, because of his temper and all
that. From all I am told, you may depend upon it, he is not enjoying
himself, Mr. Kit, so very much more than you are. And that is not very
much, to go by your face; sorry as I am to see it, sir, after saving me
from the jaws of death.”

“Nonsense, Mrs. Marker; you saved yourself, by your presence of mind,
and a light young foot.”

“You say things beautifully, Mr. Kit. It was always your gift as a
child, I have heard, though not old enough here to remember it. And
now, sir, remember that you have one good friend, who will never be
happy, till you are. A feeble friend, but a warm one, and able perhaps
to do more than you think. Nothing shall go by me that you ought to
hear of. Good-bye, sir, good-bye. Everything will come right, and you
shall pay me, for telling your fortune.”



DOWNY BULWRAG was indeed in trouble—not brought on by his evil deeds,
as good people might have imagined; or at any rate not so caused
directly, according to present knowledge, although in the end it proved
otherwise. It had seemed an astonishing thing to me, considering his
haughtiness and shrewd perception, that he should have deigned to
expose himself to that quiet rebuff from Miss Coldpepper. And then that
he had gone upon another quest of money, even more humiliating, showed
that there must be some terrible strait, some crushing urgency in his

He was not a man who lived extravagantly; he was rather of the mean and
close-fisted order, even in his self-indulgence. From what had been
said at Sam Henderson’s dinner, it would seem that he had fallen into
certain racing debts; but I could not believe that these were crippling
him, for he generally managed to work them off, and come out with a
balance in his favour. But there was another thing in the background,
of which I had no knowledge yet; and when I speak of it now, it must be
understood that I do so from later information.

That account in the _Globe_, which the clergyman showed me, had been
followed by further particulars in the Journals of the following day,
and by one or two extracts from private letters brought to England
by the _Simon Pure_. But the ships had been parted by a sudden gale,
after a very brief interview, and some despatches, which were not
quite ready, had lost their chance of delivery. There was nothing of
interest to me, except what I had seen at first; and no letter from
the Captain to my wife arrived by post, which surprised me for the
moment. But that was explained by the likelihood that he might have
been hurried with official reports, while intending to send his private
letters with them, and thus had lost the chance of despatching either.
And as any such letter must have missed its mark, there was no great

But the _Simon Pure_ landed near Liverpool, as I came to know long
afterwards, an unhappy and afflicted man, welcome to no person and to
no place on the face of the habitable globe. An elderly man of great
bodily strength, and bulk of frame, and large stature, he had better
have gone beneath the earth—as the father of poets has it—than linger
on it, lonesome, loathsome, shunned, abominated, and abhorred.

His sins had been many, and his merits few; he had lived for his own
coarse pleasures only; he had never done good to man, woman, or child;
yet he might have called any man worse than himself, who refused to
grieve for his awful grief—for this man was a leper.

The captain of the _Simon Pure_ was humane as well as resolute. This
Spaniard, as he called himself, had lurked under a tarpaulin, till the
boat of the _Archytas_ was far away, and the gale began to whistle
through the shrouds and chains. Then he came forth and showed himself,
holding forth his hands, defying the sailors to throw him overboard.
For a month he had been treated well by the crew of the exploring ship,
who were all picked men of some education, and ready to listen to
reason. He had managed to quit them without their knowledge, and cast
his lot among a less enlightened crew.

The boldest feared to touch him, but with nautical skill they encoiled
him in ropes from a distance, and were just beginning their yo-heave-oh
chant, when the captain rushed up and dashed them right and left. With
his own hand he unbound the leper, and led him forward, and allotted
him a place on the forecastle, where none might come near him, except
to bring him food, and where he must abide, if he cared to live. His
chief desire was to get back to England, and finding himself well
on the way for that, he indulged in strange antics, and shouted and
roared, as if all the ship belonged to him. When the moon was high—for
the moon appears to have strange power over those outcasts—the sailors
were afraid to keep the deck, with his wild songs flowing aft to them;
for he had belonged to a colony of Indian lepers, and had learned their

As soon as the ship was in the Mersey, he contrived to be quit of her.
Perhaps he was afraid that his condition would be made known to the
authorities, who might find it their duty to observe him, though they
could not legally confine him. At any rate he escaped any such trouble,
by dropping into a boat, and landing on the south side of the river. A
purse had been made for him by the sailors, not a very heavy one, for
they were short of cash, but enough to carry him to London—at once the
fountain and the cesspool of diseased humanity.

Donovan Bulwrag had been unable, after his recovery, to put up with the
control and order of his mother’s house in Kensington. He had taken
private rooms again, in a little street near Berkeley Square; and
though his mother was not well pleased, she had now to contend with a
will as strong as her own, and even firmer. He must have his own way in
this, he must be indulged at every cost, rather than driven to mutiny
when all depended on him. If once he were married to Lady Clara, all
would be wealth and prosperity. She had hoped to see it done ere now,
but a wicked chance had crossed her.

It was nearly twelve o’clock one night, towards the end of February;
and Bulwrag, having returned from his club much earlier than usual, was
sitting by the fire in his dressing-gown, with a cigar in his mouth
and a bottle of very old Cognac on the table. He was not in a pleasant
humour, for the luck had been against him, and foreseeing worse he had
come away, for he was growing superstitious.

He was dwelling gloomily on the dull necessity before him—the
“brilliant prospect,” his mother called it, but he disliked his
intended bride; and this good thing (alone perhaps) may be said in his
favour—he was not wholly mercenary. I would fain hope, though without
much faith, that he may have felt some true regret at the cruel wrong
he had done me—for verily the expiation was nigh.

Suddenly the front-door bell rang sharply, and the poor weary maid
shuffled down the stairs. She had told him, when he came in that night,
that a tall strange-looking gentleman, with his face muffled in a white
cravat, had called about nine o’clock and left word that he would
come again that evening. He had given his name as “Senhor Diaz,” and
Bulwrag, after wondering vainly, concluded that it must be some one
connected with the sailor Migwell, whom he had seen in the autumn.

Slow heavy steps approached his door, and the maid was dismissed with
some gruff words in a foreign language quite unknown to Donovan. Then
the door was opened without a knock, and a big man stood and looked at

“Who are you? And what do you mean by coming at this time of night?”
Bulwrag spoke in his roughest tone, for the man was shabby and

The visitor coolly took a chair, handling it in a peculiar manner, for
he seemed to have bags on, instead of gloves. Then he crossed a pair of
gigantic legs; and Bulwrag saw that he wore no boots, but loose slops
of hide with the hair on, in size and shape much like the nosebag of a
horse. His hat was flapped over his ears and forehead, and he spoke not
a word, but gazed at Downy with large red eyes, having never a hair of
lash or brow to shade them. Bulwrag shuddered, and drew his chair away;
he had never been looked at like this, and could not meet it.

“In the name of the Devil—” He could get no further; for the eyes of
this monster, and the strange formation under the cloth, where his face
should have been, declared that he was laughing.

“You have learned to swear. Valedon—very good”—the voice sounded
dead through the mufflings, and the accent was not like an
Englishman’s—“chip of the old block. I was famous for that, at your
age, young man.”

“What do you know of my age? Who are you? What are you? What brings you
here at this time of night? What do you want me to do for you?”

Even Downy Bulwrag was hurried and confused, and lost his resources in
the presence of this man; and a fearful idea made his blood run cold.

“Ha, he knows me not. He is not a wise son”—the stranger still kept his
red eyes on him—“where is the voice of nature, that I am compelled to
introduce myself?”

“Speak out. Do you mean to stop here all night? Don’t cover your face
up, like a thief. In the name of God, who are you?”

The stranger slowly uncovered his face, sliding the bandage from his
cheek-bones downward, with a clumsy movement of his bagged hands; then
he rose to his full height and stood before the gas, and looking
no longer at Bulwrag, waited to be looked at by him. His face was
transformed into that of a lion.

“You must go to a hospital. Don’t come near me. Pull it up again, for
God’s sake.”

“It is God who has done it, if there is a God. And why should a man be
ashamed of it? Embrace your father—as the Frenchmen say—in a few years
you will be like him.”

“Don’t come near me, I tell you again. I have a revolver in this
drawer; none of your pop-guns, but a heavy bullet. I don’t want to hurt
you, if you will only go away.”

“My son, I do not intend to go away. It grieves me to hear you speak
of it. Surely you never would cast off your father, for such a sweet
trifle as leprosy.”

Bulwrag began to recover himself, which was more than most men of his
years would have done. Nature had not endowed him with the largest head
in London, without putting something inside it. His sitting-room was
small and plainly furnished, but having been used by convivial men, it
possessed a long table (now set against the wall) which would slide
out to still greater length with levers. He drew this across the room,
extended it, and closed the gap at the end with the one in common use.
Then he threw up the window at his side of the room, after fastening
back the curtains, and requested his visitor to throw up the other; for
the house was a corner one, and the room had “cross-lights.”

“Couldn’t do it, my son. Would you like to see my hands? No? Very
well, you must take them upon trust. I have three fingers left, but
the spot is upon them. However, you are a brave fellow, so far, though
infected with popular ignorance. Nine out of ten would have rushed
away, shouting ‘Murder!’ But you may put away your shooting-irons, as
the Yankees call them. A hole in my body does more good than harm,
under the circumstances. Once for all, my complaint is not contagious,
or at any rate not among well-fed people; and you are well-fed, if ever
anybody was. Give me a cigar; you will do that gladly for your own
interest, I dare say. I can smoke it with my bandage on. Now a glass of
good brandy—no water with it. You may break the glass afterwards, if
you think proper, as the fools did on board the _Simon Pure_; but never
in the _Archytas_. Ah, that was a ship of science!”

“The _Archytas_? Do you mean to say you have been in her?”

“Without her and her glorious captain, my son, you would never have
seen your beloved parent. And more than that, if there had not been
a beautiful young lady on board that ship, I should never have been
here. Ah, you may well be surprised to see me. If ever any man has been
knocked about—seventeen wounds I could count, till this affair took
five away. And one of them laid me five years by the heels, laid me
under ground, it was said everywhere. I suppose you heard that I was

“Yes, and on very good authority too. But I was too young to know much
about it. Do you know what has happened in the family?”

“Ah, the Spaniards are the men for proverbs. ‘Believe no man dead till
he comes and proves it.’ But women can always believe what they wish.
Curse the woman, she has caused all my troubles. But wait a little

The deep thick voice, and the glare of his father’s eyes, made Downy
tremble. “Surely you will not—in this condition—you will go to a
hospital and get cured—you will leave the management of things to me.”

“Will I? No doctor in the world can cure me, or lengthen the months of
my rotting away. And I got it by goodness, I took it by goodness. If I
had stuck to my nature, I should have been sound. No more goodness for
me in this world, and none in the next. Can a leper go to heaven?”

For a while they sat silent, the old man puffing his smoke through
his muffler, and lifting the glass between his great wrists every now
and then; the young man absorbed in this awful puzzle, with his vast
head drooping on his breast. It had never even crossed his mind to ask
whether this man might be an impostor. He felt that every word was
true; and now what possible course remained for him? At length his
father spoke again.

“Come, cheer up, my hearty, as the sailors said to me, though they took
care to say it a long way off. You don’t seem delighted to have found
a father, and a man of such renown and rank. Why, I am the Marquis of
Torobelle, and you are the heir to the title. Lord Roarmore doesn’t
sound much after that. But alas, I have nothing to keep up the title,
and I dropped it among the Indians. I shall have to trouble you a
little in that way; one cannot live on glory. Oh, but they treated me
infamously, when I could do no more for them. They drove me across the
Rio Negro into Patagonia, and paid a tribe of the wandering Indians
never to let me back again. They passed me on to the Moluches, and I
tried to make my escape from them, but was caught and left for dead
again, till a woman took pity on me. Then I married her, and lived on
putrid fish with a roving horde of the Eastern tribes, in a miserable
country, where no white man goes. Then I took the disease from the diet
and the nursing of my poor woman in her illness, and for five years
I was shut up in the leper’s den—as they called a reeking peninsula,
which explorers know as Saint Jacob; at the back of a place called the
Bottomless Pit. There was no getting out; there were thirty of us,
sometimes more, and sometimes less, sometimes we got victuals, and
sometimes we starved, and I was the only white man there.

“Although we were quite close to the sea, and almost surrounded by it,
we were far away from all chance of ships, on a desolate, barbarous
coast in a curve a hundred leagues out of the line of traffic. And
there I must have wasted into a sandy skeleton, for there was no
possibility of escape inland, unless a good angel had been sent to
fetch me. For the ship was taking soundings, or something of the sort,
having come far away from the usual course, to find the truth about
the bottomless gulf; and all I could do would have gone for nothing,
except for that young lady. They were giving us a wide berth, as if
we all were savages, when luckily for me she brought her spy-glass to
bear, and declared that she saw a white man among the rest. The others
laughed at her, for you may be pretty sure that there was not much
white about me just then; but she stuck to it, and ran for the Captain,
and insisted that a boat should be sent to see about it. Oh, I could
worship that girl, I could; though it isn’t much good to me, after all.

“Come, you ought to say you will take care that it is, and devote all
your days and your money to the welfare of your persecuted parent. You
must have expected me long ago, or at any rate had some hopes of it,
for I sent you a message several years ago, and some documents too
from Mendoza, before I was banished finally. A knockabout fellow swore
to find out all about you, and deliver them the next time he was in
London. Do you mean to say he has never done it?”

“Not till last autumn; and it was so old, I thought nothing more would
come of it. A sort of half Englishman, half Spaniard. But a faithful
fellow, and thought wonders of you. When he first came with your
message, he got into a scrape before he could deliver it. He stabbed a
man at the Docks, and had to bolt again, and he fought shy of London
for years after that. But to see you like this was the last thing I
could dream of. You said not a word of this in your letter.”

“Because I had not got it then. I took it from misery and starvation,
and living among the savages. Ah, I have seen a good deal of the world,
and met with some wonderful people. How small even London seems to me!”

“Yes, I dare say; and how small the world is! You could tell many a
tale no doubt, but none more wonderful than your own. Do you know who
it was that fetched you off—the Captain of the _Archytas_?”

“Give me more brandy. It is good enough for that.” The great stranger
shook himself—though he might have had more manners—and his clothes
rattled round him like mildewed pea-pods. “I knew nothing about it at
the time, of course; but since I came here I know everything. Why it
was the man who stepped into my shoes, and a devilish sight too good
to do it. Ah, he has had his hair combed, once or twice, I doubt.
Better almost have turned leper at once. How good he was to me! No
haughty airs, no shudders, no ‘keep your distance, dog!’ He was not at
all sure of contagion, till he looked at his books in the cabin. But
it made no difference to him. He could not tell who I was; he took me
for a Spaniard—‘Diaz’ was the name I went by—but he treated me as a
Christian, as Christ himself would have treated me.”

The poor man lifted his hat as he spoke, from his naked yellow head,
and the glare of his eyes was clouded. The power to weep was gone, but
not the power of things that move to it.

“And he did a good work for himself,” he resumed, looking fiercely
again at Downy; “he did himself a better turn than me, without knowing
anything about it. Every one of my troubles has been through that
woman. She never knew what a man’s wife is. She wanted to be man and
woman too. The Pulcho Indians would have taught her something. Top-knot
come down. Your husband is a leper, and the man you have eaten up for
years goes free. I am only waiting till the proper time comes. I have
had a fine time of it; and so shall she.”

“But I suppose you don’t want to hurt your children;” Donovan spoke in
a surly voice, for he saw that this man was not one to be soothed;
“what harm have your children ever done you? By appearing now you would
simply starve us; and what could we do to help you then? You have been
in London for weeks, I dare say, and you have learned all you could
about us. Did you learn that we are living in Fairthorn’s house, and
on Fairthorn’s money? And what becomes of that, when you turn up? Did
you learn that I am likely to marry a lady of great wealth and good
position? What becomes of that if you turn up? You have not let my
mother know a word as yet?”

“Not I. Not a syllable yet, my son. What a strange thing it seems
to have a son again! No, I don’t want to hurt you, or the two girls
either. I have managed to get a look at them. How they would have
stared, if they had guessed it. I consider them to be a credit to me,
and I hope they are better than their mother. And you are a credit in a
certain way—a strong, plain-spoken fellow. Not much humbug about you,
I should say. And of course, I can’t expect much affection. But I dare
say you are sorry about your poor father.”

“Father, I am. I am broken down about you. I have always thought well
of you, and made allowance for you.”

“God knows that I have wanted it, my son. I will do all I can to help
you now. I will live in some hole, and not show myself, for a time. But
only for a time, mind you. My revenge I will have, when it can’t hurt
you so much. But you must give me money, to support me till that day.
What will you pay, and how long will you want?”

“Three months, perhaps four; and pay two pounds a week. It is all I can
afford, for I am awfully hard up. After my marriage, five pounds, if
you like. Give me your address. You can have two weeks’ money now. It
is all I have by me. But don’t come here again; these people are very
suspicious. I will arrange to meet you somewhere.”

The poor cripple managed to take the money, and after a few more words
departed. Then Bulwrag flung the other window up, cast the tumbler out
of it, and lighted some pastilles. Then he took a draught of brandy
neat, and went upstairs to sit in his bedroom, and brood over this



OF all those things I had no knowledge, till it came upon me suddenly;
except that I heard from time to time, both through Mrs. Marker and
Mrs. Wilcox, and even Miss Coldpepper, that Donovan Bulwrag was going
on strangely, and no one could understand him. He was in such a state
of mind that even his mother feared to cross him, and his sisters
were afraid to ask him anything about it. And no one could tell what
his motive was; but all agreed that he was now as anxious to marry
Lady Clara, as he had been careless about it last year. This—as so
often seems to happen—diminished the ardour of the other side, and
the Earl insisted more and more that he should bring something solid
into settlement. The estates of his grandfather, Lord Roarmore,
were evidently encumbered, and that ancient nobleman himself, now
approaching his ninetieth year, was almost incapable of business.

Though I had been terribly afflicted for a year, without the
satisfaction of deserving it, there was one thing beyond denial, to
wit that I had met with most wonderful kindness from friends, and
neighbours, and the world at large. If any one says to me henceforth
that there is no such thing as good feeling, or good will, and that
everything is selfishness, I shall tell him that he judges all his
neighbours by himself, and I wish to hear no more of him.

And now when the fatal day came round, which would fill up the
twelvemonth of my misery, no less than six people were thoughtful
enough to give me the offer of being from home, when it must be a
bitter home to me. Uncle Corny, Aunt Parslow, and Mr. Golightly, Sam
Henderson, and Mrs. Wilcox, and Widow Cutthumb, all entreated me to
come to them, if I did nothing more than hear them talk. Mrs. Marker,
if she had lived in her own house, would have added her invitation; and
Mr. Rasp the baker—though now getting on, almost beyond recognition—got
his wife to write to me, and say that they would have a little
card-party in the evening.

But there were too many young ladies there for me, to be seen in the
shop behind jam-pots, in a style we could never enter into; and if I
had meant to go to any place at all, that would have been the last of
them, because I should have felt what Kitty would be thinking—“Well,
he does enjoy himself, without me!”

“Come to the Derby,” Sam Henderson said, meaning it all for my good,
no doubt; “and see old Chalks win with _Nutmeg-grater_. He is at 40
to 1—makes it all the surer—the finest foal my old _Cinnaminta_ ever
threw. Quite a moral, my son; I shall make four thou. Get on, while you
can. Kept him dark as night. Tony came sniffing, but we gave him snuff.
Before the flag falls, he will be at 4 to 1. Invest, my son, invest, if
you wish to tool your Kitty in a four-in-hand.”

“Sam, you are up, or you would not talk so.” He saw that he should not
have said it, and was dashed.

“Well, old fellow, I beg your pardon. But as sure as a horse has got
four legs, you will have her back again within four months. Lay you ten
to one, in fivers.”

“Do you think I would bet about a thing like that? Sam you are a good
friend; but this is not like you.”

“Only wanted to keep your pecker up. The pluckiest fellow gets in the
dumps sometimes. Never take it crusty, when a cove means well. Sorry
you won’t come to us to-morrow. Sally gives a rare spread at nine
o’clock. But every man knows his own ways best. I shall look you up, on
my way home. Expect to have some news, but won’t bother you till then.
Good news, fine news for you, Kit.”

He spoke to his glassy little nag, and was off, before I could ask
him what he meant. And I said to myself that it could only be some
nonsense, to keep my spirits up.

The day of my trouble, the 15th of May, happened to be the Derby day
that year, and our quiet little village was disturbed with joy. Every
one who could raise a pair of shafts, or even of shanks, was agog right
early, and I heard their shouts over my uncle’s wall, while they set
forth as merry as Londoners. I resolved not to leave my work all day,
except for a crust of bread and cheese, that there might be no room and
no time for moping, which sits on our laps when we cross our legs. But
when it grew dark, and I went home alone, I tried in vain to whistle,
and my heart felt very low.

What was the use of keeping up? It was only a sham and a self-deceit.
Ten years were as likely to go by as one, without bringing any
consolation to me. All the prime of my life must pass in sorrow, empty,
mysterious, lonely sorrow. Perhaps when I grew old and could care for
no one, having no one to care for me, when it mattered very little how
my life was to finish, the matter might be cleared up, all too late.
Even my uncle Corny’s trouble, heavy, incurable, and life-long as it
was, seemed light in comparison with mine; because all its history was
manifest, and all suspense was over. How much longer must this misery
drag on? If my Kitty were not dead, she must have come back long ago.
Or perhaps she had forgotten me and married some low villain.

“_Nutmeg-grater, Nutmeg-grater, Nutmeg-grater_, for ever!” Two merry
fellows were shouting for their lives, as they walked in wavering
latitudes among the flowering pear-trees.

“Let me tell him.” “No, I’ll tell him.” “What do you know about it?”
“Why you never saw him in your life.” My heart gave a jump, for I
thought it must be some grand news, by this fuss about it.

“Right you are, Kit. Right you shall be. _Nutmeg-grater_, and Kit
for ever!” they shouted as they saw me sitting in the dusk, on a big
flower-pot outside my door. “Shake hands, old fellow; shake hands, here
he is. He knows all about it. Major Monkhouse, let me introduce you.
Mr. Kit Orchardson, Major Monkhouse, the two best fellows in the world
together, and _Nutmeg-grater_ is the third.”

I saw that Sam was a little in advance of his usual state, and the
Major not behind him. They were flourishing their hats, full of
skeleton dolls, and striking attitudes, and spinning round now and then
against each other.

“What are you come to tell me, gentlemen? Is it about the race?” I
asked, trembling to think it must be something more.

“The race be d——d!” cried Major Monkhouse, one of the most courteous of
men, when sober, as I discovered afterwards. “As between man and man,
sir; as between man and man, you know—”

“The Major’s hat is full of money,” said Sam, as if his own were empty;
“when that is the case, a confounded good fellow is better than ever,
sir—better than ever.”

“Shake hands,” the Major shouted; “Sam, shake hands!” And he took mine
by mistake, but it made no difference. “You have such a manner of
expressing what you call it—equal honour to his hands and head. This
gentleman must not mistake my meaning. Mr. Archerson, excuse me, you
understand my sentiments. You might ride him, sir, with a daisy-chain.”

“Sit down, gentlemen.” I was trying to be patient, and thought that the
safest position for them.

“Not a drop, Kit, not a drop, my good fellow. I am all but a total
abstainer now. And as for the Major, why, his doctor tells him—”

“No good, sir, no good at all. ‘Dr. Bangs,’ I says, ‘you may
be right; but you don’t catch me taking any of your confounded
stim—shim—shimmulers.’ Sam knows how hard he tried; but it wouldn’t do,

“Oh, but you were come to tell me something. I thought you came out of
your way on purpose—something of importance to me?”

“Right you are, Kit, right as usual. There never was such a boy to hit
the mark. Set you up, Kit, set you on your legs again—no more poking,
no more potting, no more pottering under a wall, no more shirking the
Derby—mind you, a d——d ungentlemanly thing to do. Why we wouldn’t have
known it but for that!”

“Never should have seen her, without that,” said Major Monkhouse,
solemnly; “put away too secretly among the lost tribes. Ah, she is a
stunning woman!”

“Now will you tell me what you mean?” I felt that I should like to
knock their tipsy heads together; “this may be a very fine joke to you.
But no excitement excuses it.”

“Excitement! Cool as a cucumber, sir;” cried the Major, with a
countenance by no means cool, “I should like to know what you mean by
that insinuation.”

“Leave it to me, Major; leave it all to me. Our friend Kit is a little
hasty,” said Henderson, whispering to me—“Don’t mind him, a very grand
fellow—but has had too much. Major Monkhouse, it is our place to make
every allowance for married men. They never know very well what they
are about.”

“By George, sir, you are right. Mr. Archerson, shake hands. I honour
you for your integrity, sir. Sorry for you, very sorry, and apologize
with candour. Every Englishman adds to his self-respect by that.”

“How he puts things! It comes of being in the Army. Now go to sleep,
Major, it will do you a lot of good, while I tell friend Kit all we
have been doing for him.”

By this time my hopes were reduced to proper level, and I had ceased to
glance through the trees behind them, in search of somebody who might
never come again. For these two men had come in with such a flourish,
that the wildest ideas ran through me.

“A drop of ice-cold water from your pump,” said Sam, “and then I’ll
tell you something that will please you. My coppers are hot, because I
have taken next to nothing; and the dust—you should have seen it! You
have heard of the celebrated Zinka, haven’t you, the most wonderful
creature that was ever born? Well, my dear friend there, the very
finest fellow that ever stepped this earth, sir—don’t deny it, Major,
but go to by-by—I met him at the corner on Monday, Kit; and old Pots
was there, and that made me talk of you. ‘Tell you what,’ he says,
‘let us see the great Zinka. She can’t help being there on Wednesday.
It is the only day in the year you can catch her; but the stars always
bring her to the Derby. If he won’t come, you bring something of his,
something he has worn, or had about him. If it is bad news, why we need
not tell him, and if it is good, why it will be new life to him.”

“Of course I jumped at it, and it shows what a fool I am that it had
never occurred to me. Zinka is the queen of all the gipsies, although
she is only five and twenty, the most beautiful woman on the face of
the earth. Don’t tell Sally that I said so. Why she is Cinnaminta’s
daughter, that my old mare is named from. So you may suppose that she
knows everything. If we could only get her to spot the winners for
us—but she won’t, she wouldn’t for a hundred thousand pounds.

“Well, I prigged your handkerchief yesterday, my boy. No professional
could have done it neater; and a queer thing it was that it should be
your wife’s with her maiden name done in her own hair. Nothing could
be luckier, and we had a rare laugh at it. Zinka was on the downs,
not like a common gipsy, but half a mile away towards Preston, in a
beautiful tent of her own, for she never mixes with the common ruck.
It takes an introduction, I can tell you, and a good one too, to get a
word from her. But the Major managed that, for he knows something of
her people. There is no flummery about her. You cross her hand with a
five pound note, and a crown-piece in it, and you tell her what you
want, and whatever you give her to hold she keeps.”

“You don’t mean to say that a dirty Gipsy woman has got one of my
Kitty’s pocket-handkerchiefs?”

“Dirty Gipsy woman! She’s as clean as any queen; and for majesty and
breed—oh, I wish you could have seen her. A thoroughbred filly three
years old is more graceful than any woman that ever stepped. You can’t
expect two legs to go as well as four, you know. But Zinka—well, to see
Sally walk after that! And Sally ain’t clumsy in her paces, neither.
But what do you think she said? When we had told her all about it, she
shut her great eyes for a minute, and her lashes came down to the brown
roses on her cheeks, and then she whispered—

“‘I can see a great ship coming over the sea, no smoke to it, only
white white sails. And in the front of it I can see a beautiful young
woman, looking towards England with tears in her eyes. The ship is
sailing fast, but her heart is flying faster; and she never looks back,
and answers no one, only to ask how much longer it will be.’

“‘And how much longer will it be?’ we both asked her, because it was
the very thing that you would want to know.

“‘I cannot say, perhaps three, four weeks. The sun is very hot, and
there is a black cloud before them. Perhaps it will swallow them up; I
cannot tell. No there is a great bird with long white wings; it will
take them through the cloud, and they will be safe. There, it is all
sliding from me, like a mist! But I can see her eyes still, and they
are full of tears and smiles.’

“Not another word could we get out of her, Kit. There were tears on her
own cheeks, when she opened her eyes, and she did not know a single
word she had been saying.”

“I wish you had asked her where the ship was to land, and what was the
name of it, and how she came there, and whether it would be any good
for me to go to meet it, and who it was the lady was thinking of all
the while, and how long the storm that was before them was to last, and
whether the people on board—”

“Come, Kit, that is all the thanks we get. Major, do you hear him? No,
the chap is fast asleep. Between you and me, Kit, he has had a drop too
much. But a man in a small way doesn’t win five hundred, every day of
his life, you know. By-the-way, I heard that Downy was hard hit again.
But Pots took my tip, and has pocketed a thousand. Why, you never
congratulated me, my boy. I shall throw up the book now, and invest it
in my place. But we must be off, or Sally will blow up. Such a spread!
You had better come. _Cinny_ walks into the dining-room, and drinks a
bottle of champagne, and there will be some rattling good chaps there.”

“There may be a thousand, Sam; but none better than yourself. I
congratulate and thank you, Sam, with all my heart. Few fellows would
have thought of a friend at such a time. But excuse me; I can’t come
to-night, indeed I can’t. I want to think of this all by myself. You
say that this beautiful queen is never wrong. And what a heart she
must have, what a fine heart, Sam! I should like to have seen the
tears on her lovely cheeks.”

“Oh, I say! Come, come, Kit. But she has never been known to be wrong,
my dear fellow. All the tribe call her—well, I can’t pronounce the
name, but it means something like ‘the infallible divine.’ And she does
it all so simply! There is no humbug about her. Come along, Major; why,
you must be starved.”

I was partly ashamed of my own superstition; yet I could not help
saying to myself—“They believe it; and they are ten times cleverer than
I shall ever be.”



THINGS were not going very smoothly now with Mr. Donovan Bulwrag. Three
of the four months allowed him by his father had passed already; yet
no date was fixed, or seemed likely to be fixed, for the great event
which was to make a wealthy man of him. The old man was urgent, and
could not be brought to postpone his revenge to the convenience of his
son, for he had learned already that this chip of the old block was of
a grain quite as crooked and cross-fibred as his own. His violent and
vindictive heart was burning for the day when he should trample on the
pride of the woman who had been his ruin, and had married again and
lived in luxury, while putrid fish was his diet. Neither was revenge
his only motive. Some provision must be made for him, something better
than two pounds a week, and a wretched den in London, as soon as ever
he chose to apply to his aged father’s men of business; and this he
could not do (without upsetting all his plans) until he had revealed
himself to that haughty woman.

“If you choose to make your own son a beggar, and to turn your
daughters into the streets—you must. That is all I can say. I can do
no more. I lost a lot of money to-day, all through you. I should never
have invested sixpence, but for you. It does seem a little too hard
upon a fellow, when he is doing all he knows to please a man who never
helped him.”

It was on the night of the Derby day, and father and son were holding
their usual weekly interview in the Green Park. The older man was much
better dressed and cleaner than he had been; but the other kept at a
prudent distance, and took care to smoke throughout the time. He had
looked into books, and found that the disorder is sometimes contagious,
and sometimes not.

“Whose fault is it that I have never helped you?” the cripple asked
disdainfully. “Don’t walk so fast; my feet are not like yours. You make
me even pay for my cab both ways. I came to please you. You shall pay
for my cab. And you shall pay for it a little further too. I demand to
be established on the premises. You have plenty of room; and as you
said once, it can be done without any one the wiser. How can I tell
that she won’t run away, the moment you are married? And I want to be
where I can see my daughters. In a lonely rambling, ramshackle house
like that, you could put me up easily. Why, I saw the very place,
when I went round there after dark. Who ever goes near the Captain’s
workshops? Three of them quite away from all the other rooms. I only
want one, and I will have it. It would save me ten shillings a week, as
well as cab fare. They won’t take me anywhere, in the vilest den, for
less than that, when they see what I am. Christian country isn’t it?
Why, the Pulcho Indians are better Christians than you are. Get that
room ready by this day week.”

“If I do, you must give me another month’s grace. It will be a terrible
risk to take. Every one watches us so about there; we have gained such
a reputation.”

“And I shall increase it, my son, as soon as known. Your mother never
cared what was thought of her by any one. She will now have a fine case
to defy the public with. I go into that room, this day week. My goods
are not as manifold as they were. I had twelve horses at my command at
San Luis. Ah, we all have our ups and downs. I am on the up scale now.”

Downy was very loth to receive his father so. He knew that it might be
done safely enough, if the old man would only be cautious and discreet.
But that was the very point he was sure to fail in. He would have been
a great man by this time, perhaps a Dictator of three sprawling States,
if his prudence had been equal to his strong will and valour. Some day
his history may be written; and if it should be done with any skill,
the reader will be likely to conclude that he has come across yet
another instance of good material thrown away.

“I don’t like it,” said the dutiful son; “why can’t you stay where you
are, till it is over?” That is to say, his own wedding-day.

“Because I believe that you will make her bolt. At least, nobody can
make her do anything unless she chooses. But if she heard of me, she
would bolt like a shot. And a nice fool I should be after that. It is
no good arguing. In I go, this day week; or else I leave my card at the
front door.”

Donovan Bulwrag contended vainly. His father was as stubborn as
himself, and a hundred-fold as reckless. What had this afflicted mortal
to be afraid of now? His sense of paternity must have been strong, and
the staple of his nature something better than hardware, that he should
have lain still so long in his misery, poverty, and ignominy, rather
than assert himself, and shock the public, and destroy his son’s last
hope of high position.

Downy showed more than his usual craft, in this difficult crisis of his
fortunes. He extorted from his father, before he let him in, a pledge
that he would keep himself out of sight, and never move without his
leave, for at least another month. The room in which he stored him was
cold, and dark, and damp, and entirely out of view from all the people
of the house; yet quite like a palace to the poor old man, after all
the low dens he had been lurking in. He was smuggled in at night, and
had to wait upon himself, receiving all his food from his son’s hands
alone. The window had been fitted with dark wooden blinds, for some
of the Professor’s experiments, and the obscurity was deepened by the
great ilex tree.

The Earl of Clerinhouse, though one of the wealthiest men of the day,
lived a very quiet life. His health was not strong, and he hated all
display, and had no turn for sporting, or gambling, or politics, or
any other form of noise and push. He cared not for books, or art, or
agriculture, or women, or the drama, or the pleasures of the table. He
was satisfied to take the world as he found it, and to keep himself out
of it, whenever he could. Not for the sake of saving money, for no one
could charge him with avarice; and when he saw good to be done, he did
it in the most generous and even lavish style. The few who knew him
intimately loved him deeply for his gentleness, simplicity, and good
will; and often it was said of him, and not untruly, that he had never
spoken harshly to any human being.

His father had been a great city man, keen, energetic, and
enterprising; but though the present Earl retained his interest in
great houses founded by his father, he never concerned himself about
the money-market, and entered into no speculations. The one ray of
romance in his quiet life had fallen across it when he was quite
young. When the bright suns of Sunbury were in their zenith, he had
been dazzled and smitten for a while by the lustre of Miss Monica.
Happily for him, his suit was vain; he had too little “go” in him to
suit her taste; and he married a lady better fitted for him, who left
him a widower with one daughter. But the arrogant beauty retained
and asserted—when it became of importance to her—a certain strange
influence upon his tranquil mind.

He had never liked Donovan Bulwrag, and shrank from entrusting his
treasure to him. For his daughter Clara was the treasure of his life,
the only object for which he cared to preserve his feeble vitality.
Lady Clara, now in her twentieth year, resembled her father almost too
closely. She was gentle, simple, and unpretending, apt to think the
best of everybody, and to yield to a will more robust than her own. She
was likely to make a most admirable wife for a strong and good man,
who would cherish her; but with a coarse, unfeeling husband, she was
certain to pine away and die; for her mind was very sensitive, and her
constitution weak.

Seeing little of the world, and knowing less about it, this graceful
and elegant girl had been induced, partly by the mother’s heroic
commendations, to fix her affections upon Downy Bulwrag. How any
girl could like that fellow it is hard to say; there was something
so disgusting in his countenance to me, and his slow, deliberate,
sarcastic speech, as if he thought over every word he uttered, and
passed it through his mind to make it nasty. However, she considered
him a hero; and so he was—a hero of cold cunning, and hot wickedness.

“You have at him, and I will have at her,” said this hero to his
mother, as they drove to Berkeley Square; “it can’t go on like this.
Why, I scarcely dare go out. Why, the fellows at the _Fan-tail_ were
talking all about me, when I dropped in for an hour last night. I knew
it by the way they began about the weather, and that ass of a Grogan
whispered—‘Hush! here he is.’ I shall tell her I am off to Nova Zembla
next week; and you lay it on thick about what Dr. Medley said. Work the
old muff upon that tack, and about the feeble heart-action, and the
nervous system, and all that stuff. But let me have the little doll all
to myself.”

Mrs. Fairthorn sighed, for she had quick perception, and some good
behind all her badness. “I fear that the little doll is too good for
you,” she answered; and he smiled at her.

How they managed it, matters little; but they thought they had managed
it rarely well. No doubt they told lies pat as puddings, and plentiful
as blackberries. Tho Lord, who settles all things well—as we sometimes
find out in the end—allowed them this little bit of triumph, to
increase their discomfiture. But after all, I have no ill will, and am
sorry that they had so much.

“How beautifully everything has gone off, Don!” said the lady, when
she had settled her stately form in the watered silk again; “you see
what a little tact can do. I put it as a favour to that poor thing. The
objections have come from those wretched lawyers. The poor Earl would
not hear a word about the money. I can’t think what I have been about,
not to take the bull by the horns long ago. But the fault was yours. I
could never trust you. Well, I was never more pleased in my life. It
will be in the _Morning Post_ to-morrow. Did you see how the poor Earl
looked at me? I can wind him round my finger.”

“The Professor may go to the bottom with his trawl; and then who knows
what might happen?” Donovan spoke with a bitter smile; he had never
entirely forgiven his mother for her second marriage.

“Don’t be so shocking, Don. I am ashamed of you. Well, a month is not
very long to wait; and there is a great deal to see to. Fizzy and
Jerry will be bridesmaids, of course, and I must not be quite a dowdy.
How that pest of a Dulcamara will ko-tow! She threatened me with the
Queen’s Bench yesterday. I am not sure that I shall give her any order.
I should like to break her heart, and I know how to do it. If I put the
whole into Madame Fripré’s hands, Dulcamara would never look up again.
But her cut is so inferior to Dulcamara’s. Well, I need not make my
mind up, until to-morrow.”

“I think you had better keep the whole thing quiet, and pull it off
without any fuss at all. The Earl hates pomps and vanities, so does
Clara, and so do I. We had better have no humbug.”

“And be married at a registry office, I suppose. None of that mean,
shabby work for me. Everything shall be left in my hands, and I’ll
see that things are done properly. If it was only to vex your Aunt
Arabella, after her trumpery rudeness to you, I should insist upon
decency and comfort. I know how to cut her to the heart, and I intend
to do it. The very day before the wedding, I shall write—‘Dearest
Arabella,—We have been disappointed at the last moment by the dear
Duchess of Coventry. Her Grace is afflicted with a bilious attack.
Would you mind taking her place to-morrow, and excuse the brevity of
this invitation?’ I should like to see her passionate face, when she
gets that.”

“Don’t be a fool, mother. You know, after all, you and I are the proper
heirs to her estates, though she can dispose of them as she likes. She
dislikes us; but she is an upright woman. It would be mad to offend her

“She has cheated me out of house and land. There is no primogeniture
among women. I simply did the thing she was going to do. She has
rolled in money, and let me roll in the dirt. None of her posthumous
benevolence for me! You will never see me grovelling at that woman’s

At the rehearsal of her wrongs, her violent temper rose and swelled, as
a dog’s wrath waxes with his own bark. She stood up in the carriage,
and crushed her head dress. This doubled her fury, and she turned upon
her son.

“And you—I should like to know what you are doing in my house—my house,
if you please, not yours. You think I know nothing about it, do you?
No more of it! From this very hour, you drop your disgraceful bachelor
ways, or I fetch the police and rout out those rooms. Now, remember
what I say. When I say a thing, I do it.”

“You are altogether wrong. There is nothing of the sort;” Downy
answered in a stern voice that cowed her; “to the last day of your
life, you will repent it, if you dare to go meddling there.”

“_Dare_ is not a word to use to me,” she answered in a sullen tone,
and closed her lips. If she feared any one in the world she feared
her own son Donovan. The difference between her will and his was as
that between a torrent and the sea. Hers was force, and his was power.
Sometimes she was sorry for her haste and fury; but in him there was no

He left her to herself, and said no more. In one thing they were much
alike. Neither of them had great faith in words, whether used to them
or by them. Having little faith in what they heard, they expected
little for what they said. It was no affront to either of them, but
an act of justice, to doubt every word of their mouths, because their
mouths were wells of leasing.

“You will have to clear out, poor old chap;” said Downy that night
to his father, whom he now regarded with rough affection, as well as
fitful pity. “All settled now, about you know what. In three weeks or
so, I shall have to slope. Who would bring you your grub, but your
dutiful son? What is it about the ravens? And worse than that—she has
smoked you already. In spite of all pledges, you have been out at

“Who could stay mewed up, night and day? Let her smoke what she likes;
I have got a pipeful for her.”

“Yes, and for me, and yourself too. Bedlam, or hospital, or workhouse
for us all, if she finds you here, before the job is done. After that,
have it out, when you like. No dutiful son interferes between his
parents. If this is broken off, there will be no shilling left, for you
to have sixpence out of.”

It may fairly be hoped that he had some other plan, though as yet he
durst not mention it, for saving them both from the awful meeting of
which he spoke so lightly.

“How am I to know that it is settled even now? You have put me off so
many times. I might as well be on the _Simon Pure_ again.”

“I will show it you to-morrow in the paper, announced for an early
day—and it needs be an early one.”

“Sorry to doubt you. Not at all a truthful family. Three weeks more,
my son; and that’s every hour. Let her come spying, if she likes. She
never could keep her nose out of anything, or perhaps I shouldn’t be
quite as I am. I am sorry for my lady; I only hope the pleasure will be



WHILE these things thus were growing near me, as I learned soon
afterwards, in our place there was no sign yet of anything encouraging.
My Uncle Corny, who had always vowed that he never would bet a
farthing, was now in a highly grumbling state, because he had not
backed _Nutmeg-grater_.

“A horse bred and born in our own fields—a colt I have seen through the
hedge fifty times, without caring to count his legs almost, and he goes
and wins five thousand pounds, and how much do I get? Not a penny. I
think it was very unkind of Sam; unnatural, and not neighbourly, to
let Ludred get all the good of that, and not a threepenny bit come to

“Now, Uncle Corny, you talk of justice, and every one calls you a
superior man;” I said, with the desire to mollify him, but the method
misdirected; “how many times have I heard Sam Henderson tell you to
put a bit of money on that horse? But you said—‘None of your gambling
for me!’ And now, because the horse has won, you think you have been

“Kit, you stick to your own affairs. What do you know about things
like this? I want none of their dirty money. I pay my way, by honest
work. They are a set of rogues, all together. You never see anything
clearly now. Your wits are always gone wool-gathering. Why, your own
Aunt Parslow won a box of gloves. And you are satisfied with my getting

It was true that my wits were wool-gathering now, but they travelled
a long way for nothing. Ever since Sam, and Major Monkhouse, brought
me the story of that strange vision, it seemed to be dwelling in my
brain, and driving every solid sense out of it. All day long, and all
night too, the same thing was before me—a ship with white sails piled
on one another, like a tower of marble arches, the blue water breaking
into silver at her steps, and upon the forefront a figure standing,
with arms extended and bright eyes yearning, and red lips opened to
say—“here I am!”

I went to the post, three times a day, for we now had three deliveries,
and who could wait for old Bob’s slow round? And often in the middle
of a mutton-chop, which Tabby would grind into my listless mouth, at a
shadow on the window, or the creaking of a door, I was up, and had my
hat on, and was listening in the lane.

Any one would laugh at the foolish things I did. I kept the kettle
boiling, day and night, until there was a hole in it, and I had to buy
another; I dusted all the chairs three times a day; I kept a bunch of
roses on the window-sill, and cut a fresh tea-rose, every morn and
evening, to go into Kitty’s bosom, when she should appear. I ordered a
cold chicken every day from Mr. Rasp, and garnished it with parsley,
and handed it over with a sigh to Mrs. Tompkins, when nobody came to
taste it; and I made Polly Tompkins sleep with a string round her arm,
and the end hanging out of the window. Every man on the place swore
that I was cracked, except Selsey Bill, who stuck a spade up at my door.

“Afore the rust cometh down the blade of that there tool, you’ll be a
happy man, Master Kit,” he said; and as he spoke, his little squinny
eyes were bright with something that removes the rust of human nature’s

At last I was truly getting genuinely cracked. Another week of burning
hope and weltering dejection, of tossing to the sky and tumbling to the
depths of darkness, must have left my dull brain empty of the little
gift God put in it.

When a whole month had expired from the day when hope awoke, reason
fell upon me like a flail, and hope was chaff. I made my usual
preparations, with a bitter grin at them, and set the roses in the
window, with contempt of their loveliness.

“The last time of all this tomfoolery,” I said; “to-morrow I shall work
hard again. Everything is lies, and tricks, and rot. Kitty has taken up
with some fellow, and they are laughing at me in some gambling-den. I
have a great mind to smash it up altogether. I shall sleep where that
_Regulus_ slept to-night. Much good I did by stealing him. Hard work is
the only thing worth doing.”

It was the first time that I had ever dared to think such a shameful
thing of my pure wife; and I hope that I did not think it now, but said
it by the devil’s prompting. If any one had said it in my hearing, he
would have said little else for another month. And I could have knocked
my own self on the head, with great pleasure, when I came to think of

We laugh very nicely—when they cannot hear us—at women, for not knowing
their own minds; but no woman ever born, since they began to bear us,
could have gainsayed herself, as a man did, that day. I wandered about
and lay under trees, for now it was the 15th of June, and the weather
warm and sunny; then I climbed up trees and watched the river, and the
roads, and even the meadow-path, where the cows were, and the mushrooms
grew. Then I went and had a talk with Widow Cutthumb, and when she
began to run down the race of women, I went so much further, that she
grew quite sharp, and extolled them, and put all the blame upon us. It
was waste of time to reason with her; so I let her have her own way, as
they always do.

Then I went to the butcher’s, and saw a fine sweet-bread, the very
thing for any one just come from a long journey, and perhaps a little
giddy from the rolling of a ship. With a sigh of despair I pulled out
half a crown, and made him lend me a basket and a clean white napkin.
Then I could not run home with it quick enough, for it seemed as if
some one would be dying without it; but as soon as I got to our door,
I set it down, and could not bring myself even to enter the house.
Away I went, and got into the loneliest place I could find; and being
rather light of head from grief and want of food, fell over an old
apple-trunk, and fell asleep beside it.

When I awoke, the sun was set; and the men (who were now working
overtime, to be ready for the strawberries) were all gone home with
their frails upon their backs, and their little ones coming down the
road to meet them. Dizzily I pushed my way into a grassy alley, and
sauntered homeward, wishing only to go home for ever.

The front-door was open, which did not surprise me, for I often left it
so, and the basket containing the sweet-bread was gone, and the roses
were moved from the window. The sound of my boots did not ring as it
used, and the air seemed less empty, and softer. In a stupefied hurry,
I opened the door of the parlour—and there sat Kitty!

Kitty looking at me, with a strange and timid look. As if she were not
certain that I would be glad to see her. As if she doubted whether I
could love her any more; as if her soul in earth and heaven hung on the
next moment.

I could not go to her, and I could not say a word; and to tell the
truth, I don’t know what I did. But I must have spread my arms, by
some gift of nature; for before I could think of it, there she was;
weeping—as I never could have thought it possible for any one, even in
this world of tears, to weep.

Then she put up her hand, with the fingers thrown back, and stroked my
cheeks gently, and said—“How thin! How thin!” Then she threw both arms
around my neck, and drew my face down to her lips, and covered every
inch of it with sobbing kisses. I pressed her sweet bosom to mine, and
our hearts seemed to beat into one another.

“Oh, Kit, my own, own dear old Kit! Can you ever forgive me? Ever?”

She said this I dare say fifty times, scarcely allowing me to speak,
for she said it was not good for me; withdrawing and feigning to be
ashamed of her passionate love every now and then; and then rushing
into my embrace again. Then she stood up, and threw back her beautiful
hair, and said with the glance which she knew I adored—

“Well, how do you think I am looking, love? Don’t you think it is high
time to tell me?”

She was wearing some foreign dress, beautifully cut, which set off her
figure; and she knew it very well.

“I never saw you looking half so lovely,” I replied; “though I thought
it impossible to improve you.”

“Sun-burnt, and freckled, and mosquito-bitten. But never mind, dear,
if you love your own wife. We’ll soon make all that right again. Oh, I
have been too wild! Feel how my heart is jumping.”

She was threatened with hysterics; but I soothed her gently, and she
rested on my breast with her eyes half closed. As I looked at her, I
felt that in this rapture I could die.

“Darling, I can hardly believe it yet;” she whispered, playing with
my fingers to make sure; “see, this is my wedding-ring, I never took
it off. What fine gold it is, not to tarnish with my tears. The drops
that have fallen on it—oh, I wonder there is any blue left in my eyes
at all! Do you think they are as blue, dear, as when you used to love

“They are bluer, heart of hearts. They are larger and deeper. The tears
of true love have made them still more lovely.”

“But yours are so worn, and sad, and harassed! That can’t be from
loving me more than I love you; because that is simply impossible. But
you never have been—tell me, tell me all the truth. Was there any truth
whatever in that horrible tale? Remember I shall love you just the
same. If you tore me to pieces I should love you.”

“What horrible tale? I have never heard of any horrible tale, except
your going away.”

“And you don’t know the reason! Oh Kit, oh Kit, have you taken me back
like this, without even knowing why I went?”

“Darling I have not the least idea why you went. I was too glad to get
you back, to think of anything else.”

“Well, you are a true love! You are a husband such as no woman on the
earth deserves. I don’t think even I could have taken you back so, if
you had run away from me, and I knew nothing of the cause.”

“Oh yes, you would, Kitty; I am sure you would. I believe in you, just
as you would in me, and talking has nothing to do with it. But how did
you expect me to know all about it?”

“Why, of course, by the letter I sent you from Ascension. The moment we
got your letter—the moment I could stop crying, crying, crying—I wrote
you such a letter, darling. Oh, I thought it would have killed me with
wonder, and with joy. It was almost as sweet as this—not quite, not
quite; nothing else can ever be quite so sweet as this.”

“Then were you with your father? Were you with him all the time.”

“To be sure I was, dearest. Do you think I would have gone with any one
else, away from you—away from my own husband?”

“But I thought it quite impossible for you to be with him. He was far
in the Atlantic, dear, before you ran away.”

“Before I ran away! Oh Kit, oh Kit! And you thought I had run away with
somebody else! Oh, what has my misery been, compared with yours? No
wonder you are thin, dear; no wonder you are gaunt. Why, I can’t think
how you can have managed to keep alive. I am sure I should have been
dead, buried, and forgotten. Thirteen months, a year and a month, to be
thinking your own new-married wife had run away, like a bad woman! Oh
dear! Don’t stop me; I must cry again, or I may do something worse. And
you have not even got my letter yet.”

“No. But I dare say it will come by-and-by. I expected no letter from
you, of course, because I had no idea where you were; but every day
I hoped for one from your father. But they told me the mails from
Ascension are uncertain, because they take their chance of passing
ships. Sometimes they don’t come for months together.

“Now will you read this?” she cried, jumping up with her old
impetuosity; “I am very glad I kept it, though it makes me creep every
time I touch it. That explains everything. Who wrote that?”

“It is like my writing; but I never wrote a word of it, and never saw,
or dreamed of it before.”

“Whoever wrote that letter, Kit,” my wife said very solemnly, “ought
to have his portion for ever and ever in the bottomless pit, where the
fire is not quenched. I could never have believed that any human being
could possibly have conceived such wickedness. But don’t read it now;
it would take too long, and spoil our perfect happiness, darling. We
must not be so selfish. No more kisses, until we have done our duty.
Just put me into trim again, and let me do my hair up, and we must both
run down to Uncle Corny’s. Nobody has seen me yet, but you. What do you
think I did? I was quite resolved that no one should see me, but my own
husband. So I left my things at Feltham, and ran all the way—flew all
the way, I ought to say, and came through Love Lane all alone. Oh, we
will never part again, not even for a day, Kit, or half a day. You must
never let me out of your sight any more.”

“And not out of my arms, when I can help it,” I said, as with my dear
wife still enclasped, and her hair waving over my bounding heart, I
took her through the quiet alleys of the summer night, just to show her
for a minute—for I could not spare her more—to the loyal and good Uncle



IT is out of my power to say, because I have never studied human
nature—having more than I can properly get through with trees and
animals—but according to the little I have seen, the spirit of revenge
is stronger in women, than it usually is in us. Whatever wrong a man
may have done me, if he only says that he is sorry for it, or if
without that I have got the better of him, I am quite content that
he should go, and settle the question as between him and the Lord. I
wish him no ill, but what he may do himself; and even if I hear of his
getting his deserts, I feel no elation, but endeavour to be sorry.

But my Uncle Corny, who understands the fair sex—at least according to
his own account—declares that they not only cannot forgive a deadly
wrong done to them, but continue to think that the world is a bad place
and sadly neglected by Providence, until they see the people, who have
made them unhappy, paying out for it, as they ought to do.

My Kitty was the very best of all her sex—which is saying a great deal
more than some men may imagine, and means much more than if it were
said of them—but still I could see that she was not contented even
with our new honeymoon (which was ten times sweeter than the first one,
though that had been most delicious), from a lofty desire for perfect
justice; which a man is quite satisfied to do without, knowing (as he
does) that otherwise he never could have satisfaction at all.

And yet I could see that she trembled, whenever she had hinted at that
little drawback, for fear of the danger that it might involve to me;
for she never seemed to think that I could take care of myself, as well
as she took care of me.

It is not for me to say, how these things are, or rather how they ought
to be; and I am free to acknowledge that if Downy Bulwrag had come down
meddling with my wife again, I should have killed him; and risked the
chance of being hanged for a fellow unworthy of it. And when I read
aloud that wicked letter, in the presence of Kitty and my uncle, the
next day, there were times when I longed to have him by the throat, and
prevent more lies coming out of it. For the Devil himself must have
stood at his elbow, and gone into his brain as well, while he was about
it. And he had made the ground ready for his lies to grow, by a black
mysterious note beforehand, signed—“A well-wisher in Sunbury.” This we
had not in our possession yet; but Kitty knew the effect of it upon her
father’s mind.

As I read the vile forgery, bearing my name, Uncle Corny fell back
in his chair, and shut his lips. Then he closed his fist also, and
from time to time he kept stamping with his boots, as if his feet
were tingling. But Kitty put her tender hand into mine, and her
breath was short, and her bosom heaved, and her eyes flashed like the
summer-lightning, or sometimes filled with heavy drops.

    confession to make to you, which I ought to have
    made long ago, but I knew that I must have lost your
    daughter by it. I will not pretend to excuse my
    conduct, for I know that I have behaved shamefully. But
    I could not foresee the frightful danger to which she
    is now exposed daily. My heart is almost broken, for I
    love her wildly, savagely, and in plain truth madly.

    “Last Autumn I committed a very base act, and I am
    justly punished for it. To keep your sweet Kitty here a
    little longer, and give me more chances of seeing her,
    I was mean enough to steal Miss Coldpepper’s favourite
    dog, a mongrel called _Regulus_. I hid him in my
    uncle’s garden, while the country was being searched
    for him; and thus, as perhaps you remember, I obtained
    the honour of your acquaintance. But I was punished for
    that sneakish trick. The cur bit me thrice in the legs
    and thigh, and I am doomed to a horrible death I fear;
    for the dog has gone mad, and the disease was in him

    “I have been, without any one’s knowledge, to the first
    authority in London on such matters, and he says that
    I ought to be watched, and must hold aloof from all
    family ties for a while. He asked if I was married, and
    then he told me the most horrible story I ever heard;
    and he conjured me, unless I wished to kill my wife,
    to separate from her for at least two years. When I
    would not promise that, he was anxious to write to her
    relatives himself; but I gave him a false address, and
    nothing came of that.

    “I hoped that he might be mistaken, but now I feel
    that he was only too correct. Your Kitty is not safe
    with me another day. I have the most awful sensations
    sometimes. The malady has got hold of me too surely,
    though nobody yet suspects it. I have felt a wild
    desire to tear her to pieces; and the only atonement
    I can make for my offence is to beg you to take her
    immediately. You are likely to be away for about two
    years; and when you return, if I am still alive, which
    is most unlikely, I may safely reclaim her.

    “I implore you not to let her know the cause of this
    sad parting. It would keep her in awful suspense and
    misery, and perhaps be as fatal to her, as I myself
    should be. She is so good and dutiful, and trusts me so
    entirely, that if you say it is my wish, for reasons
    you approve of—however she may grieve about it, she
    will not rebel. Come for her, or send for her, without
    my knowledge, without the knowledge of any one near our
    place; for if the story got abroad, I should go mad at
    once. My only hope lies in perfect quiet; therefore she
    must not write to me, and I must not hear a word, even
    from yourself, about her. She must not stop to pack
    up clothes, or anything whatever; for if I came in, I
    should destroy her, if I saw it. But order particularly
    that she shall take every farthing in the house she
    knows of, to equip her for her long voyage in a seaport
    town. The money is her own; and she must take it.

    “I send this by hand, as I know not where you are; but
    the bearer knows how to find you. There is no answer,
    except to do what I implore most pitifully, if you wish
    to save your only child from a fearful death, at the
    hands of the one who loves her _so madly_. I pray God
    that you may be yet in time. I feel a little calmer
    after writing this. This morning I was in agony at the
    sight of water. May the Lord have you, and my darling
    in his keeping. Oh, how base I have been, but I have
    done no murder yet!

                      “Your heart-broken son-in-law,
                                          “C. ORCHARDSON.”

When I had finished, my uncle spoke; for Kitty could only press my
hand, and sometimes look at me, and sometimes turn her eyes away and

“These are the things,” my uncle said, “that make one ashamed of being
called a man. No snake could do such a thing, and no dog would, however
mankind might train him. And the bit of piety towards the end! The
father was a blackguard, the mother a Fury, the son is the Devil with
all his angels. Oh Kit, Kit, I am old, and have met with a great deal
of wickedness, but none like this.”

“But you know, Uncle Corny, you must not be disturbed,” said Kitty
going up to him, and kissing his forehead, in her sweet and graceful
way, “just because there happen to be bad people in the world. It has
always been so, and I fear it always must. And you must not imagine
that Kit meant any harm, by—by just borrowing Auntie Coldpepper’s dog.
He did it—oh, so cleverly—just for the sake of seeing me; and he quite
changed the character of that dog. But how can that bad man have found
it out?”

“Through Harker,” I exclaimed, “through that wretch of a Harker, who
was always spying on these premises. Sam Henderson knew it, most likely
through him; but Sam would never have spoken of it.”

“It is true, then,” said my uncle. “Well, I thought it was a lie. I am
surprised to find that I have a dogstealer for my nephew.”

“It was Tabby made him do it. And I am very glad she did. But the first
thing Dr. Cutler said to me, when my heart was nearly broken with his
message, was—‘Did your husband steal that dog?’ And of course I said
‘Yes;’ for Kit had told me all about it, when we were at Baycliff; and
no doubt that convinced the good doctor that all the rest of that sad
wicked letter was true. You know, Uncle Corny, that it was impossible
for my father to leave the ship, and he sent his old friend Dr. Cutler
to fetch me. Oh, how I did cry all the way! I thought there never would
be any more happiness for me. And of course they never told me why I
was to go. I thought that Kit must be tired of me; and yet I could not
quite believe that, you know. Oh, Kit, I shall never be tired of you.”

“Don’t cry, my darling,” said my uncle kindly. “We have had enough
tears to drown that devilish letter. Now sit on Kit’s lap, to make sure
of him, and tell me your own adventures, for I have only guessed them

“Oh, I had no adventures, and I never noticed anything, only to ask
how far we were from England, and to count the days till we should
have finished all the work. I made a little calendar, as the girls do
at school, the girls I mean who have real mothers, and I blotted out
every day when it was over, and thought—‘one less now before I see Kit
again.’ Of course I asked my father what had made him send for me,
and he said it was my husband’s most earnest entreaty, and if I loved
him I must ask no more, but keep up my spirits and obey his orders.
Father never showed me this letter, or I think—though I can’t be quite
sure—that I should have doubted about it. The writing is exactly like
Kit’s in some places, but in others it is different, and the style
is not like Kit’s. That wicked man stole several letters of Kit’s; I
suspected it then, and now I know it.

“My father had not the smallest doubt, of course, but he was puzzled
when I spoke about that telegram, you know what I mean—the one from
Captain Jenkins at Falmouth, to say the ship was on her voyage, and to
send good-bye to us. He had sent no such message, and had spoken no
such ship, and said that it must be some extraordinary mistake. But you
see now it was another piece of falsehood, to make it look impossible
that I could be with my father.

“It was father himself who went to Baycliff to inquire, knowing that
we had been there, and being near it. But he could not come here, and
so he sent Dr. Cutler, who knows all this neighbourhood well, and
managed it all to perfection with the help of some one, who was sent by
agreement to meet him. Oh dear, when I think of that dreadful time; and
I was not allowed to leave a line for my husband, except what I wrote,
on the sly, in the Prayer-book. Well, that did him some good, at any
rate; didn’t it, my own darling?

“I am quite ashamed to talk of my own sorrow, when I think of what
Kit has been through for me. But I am sure I ate nothing for at least
a month, and Dr. Cutler, who was in charge of the health of the ship’s
company, became quite uneasy about me. As for their experiments,
deep-sea dredging, and soundings, and temperatures, and all that, I
did not even care to look at them, and I am not a bit more scientific
than when I went out, though perhaps I shall talk as if I was,
by-and-by. The only thing I felt any interest in was the rescue of a
poor afflicted man—I think they called him a Spaniard, though he seemed
to me more like an Englishman—who was kept as a prisoner among some
savages in a desert place in South America. He was terribly afflicted
with some horrible disease; and the sailors would not go near him,
until they were ashamed when they saw me do it. We were all very kind
to him, but he left us, and got on board another ship bound for home.

“Oh, how I used to tremble, Kit, whenever we saw a ship in the
distance, hoping for news of you, my dear, and of Uncle Corny, and
everybody. But we met very few ships, being generally employed in
out-of-the-way places, and only landing anywhere two or three times,
for water, or fruit, or vegetables.

“But when we got to Ascension Island, which is an English place, you
know, what a joyful surprise there was for me! I shall always bless
that little rocky spot, for it gave me back my life again. When father
received my husband’s letter, for the first time in his life, he was
in a real fury. Something or other had occurred before, besides that
affair of the telegram, which made him a little doubtful about this
wicked, wicked letter. And now he saw at once that he had been imposed
upon most horribly. We were all afraid that he would have had a fit,
but Dr. Cutler saved him.

“‘My poor injured child!’ he kept on exclaiming; ‘wretched for at
least a year, and injured for life, by this monstrous villainy!’ He
would have thrown up his command at once, if he could have done it
honourably, and brought me home by the very next ship. But if he had
done so, the cruise must have ended; for Lieutenant Morris, who was
next to him, was invalided at Fort George. I was quite ready to come
home alone, by any ship, English or foreign; but as it happened, Dr.
Cutler received by the same mail an urgent request from his wife for
his return; and so the very gentleman I ran away with brought me back
to my husband. It was a long time before we could get a ship, and then
it was only a sailing vessel, and oh how slowly she seemed to go! Then
about a month ago, we had a very heavy storm, which drove us I don’t
know how far out of our course, and I thought that I never should see
Kit again. But now it seems all like a horrible dream. Father will be
home, in November, I hope. I intend to work hard to help Uncle Corny;
and Kit will soon be well again, with me to mind him.”



“YOU must not let it drop, Kit; you can’t let it drop,” said Aunt
Parslow, as she sat in our parlour, the next day, having ordered
Parker’s fly, as soon as she received my letter; “for the sake of your
sweet wife, you are absolutely bound to expose this horrid miscreant.
I doubt if there ever was such a case before, though nothing ever
surprises me. It was very nasty of you to steal that dog—why, you
might have come and stolen _Jupiter_, on the very same principle of a
pretty girl—and you have been punished, even more than you deserved.
You deserved a month in the stocks perhaps, with all the dogs in the
village sniffing at you; but you did not deserve to lose your own wife,
just when you had time to get fond of her. I am not for revenge; I am
too old to fancy that we can do much to right ourselves, even if the
feeling was Christian; but I belong to an honourable family, in which
the fair fame of a lady was never neglected.”

“I declare I never thought once of that; it never occurred to me in
that light,” I answered with perfect truth; for my Kitty’s fair fame
seemed to me so entirely above all question, that it could not need any
assertion; “but since it is capable of being looked at so, there is no
doubt what my duty is.”

“No husband of proper spirit could doubt for a moment what his duty
is.” Miss Parslow spoke very severely; but my wife looked at her
reproachfully, and ran up to me.

“No, Kit, no. You shall not go near him. There is nothing too bad for
him to do. I have lost you quite long enough already. What do I care
what anybody says? Miss Parslow, you have been wonderfully kind, and it
is impossible to thank you. Don’t spoil it all, by putting this into
his head.”

“My dear, we shall send the two policemen with him,” my aunt replied
rather sarcastically; “we know how precious he is, and we won’t have
him hurt. Or perhaps your Uncle Cornelius might go. He has no wife, to
make a to-do about him. Look, here he comes with somebody, to tell us
something! He walks like a man of thirty-five, and how polite he always

Uncle Corny had brought Mrs. Wilcox from his house, and that good lady
was in great excitement. She fell upon Kitty, and kissed and hugged
her, until I thought really there had been enough of that; and then she
turned round, and addressed us at large, casting forth her words with
vehemence, and throwing out her hands, as if to catch them.

“Ladies, and gents, oh ladies and gents, such a thing have just come to
my knowledge through Ted, which is the most intellectuous boy, though
my own child, and was never such myself. I set off straightway, when
I heard it, and beg to excoose of my present disapparel, to catch the
three ten ’bus, or else wait another hour. And if there is a good horse
on the place, which by the look of it there must be many, I do beg of
Master Kit to put him in at once, if not too late to prevent bloody
murder. Them police is so slow, so slow; though I never join in a
single word against them, for all morshal men is fallible.”

“I can’t make out what it is,” said Uncle Corny, when we all looked at
him, for an explanation; “this good lady must be allowed her own time;
I am afraid that I have hurried her.”

“Not at all, Mr. Orchardson, not at all. Nothing could be more
gentlemanly, and I will say the same of all Sunbury. But the wedding
was to be to-morrow, gents, regardless of expense, at eleven o’clock,
at the church of Saint Nicholas, the Virgin. It was not for me to
forbid the banns, though knowing of holy impediments. Very handsome it
was to be with six bridesmaids, Miss Frizzy and Miss Jerry for two of
them. Cook, who is a very self-respected young woman, though Ted says
she have turned forty-two, and no concern of his if she is even two and
forty, she dropped in promiscuous and told me all about it, and all was
as merry as a marriage-bell. But just as I was having my bit of dinner,
in she comes with her cap-ribbons flying off, and her apron-strings
burst, being rather stout with running.

“‘For God’s sake, come up, Mrs. Wilcox,’ she says ‘or there’ll be
murder done, murder done, and nobody to see it.’

“I was there in two minutes, as you may suppose; and there was madam,
tearing up and down the front walk, with her black silk cloak on that
makes her look so tall, and her face—oh, you should have seen the
colour of it, and the flashing of her eyes, and the waving of her
arms. ‘I insist upon knowing. I insist upon going in. Am I going to
be locked out of my own house? To-morrow, indeed! Don’t talk to me of
to-morrow. How dare you prevent me from entering my own door? I’ll find
out your disgraceful tricks, and expose you. You are not fit to marry a
respectable girl. I’ll send for a policeman, and have the door forced.’

“‘You won’t do anything of the kind,’ her son Mr. Downy made answer
quietly, although I could see that he was awful pale, and he sat on
a kitchen chair in front of the door, with his broad shoulders set
against it. ‘I tell you it is for your sake that I will not allow it.
You may walk about all night, but you won’t walk in here.’

“Ladies, and gents, she kept pacing up and down, like a Beelzebub more
than a mortal woman, raving and ranting to such a degree, that a crowd
of people came and looked over the gate, and they began to cry, ‘Bravo,
Rous!’ ‘Go it, old lady!’ ‘Hit him hard, he ain’t got no friends’—and
all that stuff; you know how free and easy a London crowd is. Then she
marched up to the gate, and looked at them, and they fell away ashamed,
and she walked into the house. But have her way she will, before the
sun goes down. She has sworn it, and she never breaks her oath.”

“It is no concern of ours,” said my uncle very sensibly; “what have we
to do with such family quarrels? What made you come to us, Mrs. Wilcox?”

“Two things, sir; in the first place, you know more of the law than any
gentleman I know. You remember how you told me that last winter, and
every word you said came true as gospel. And what is more than that,
poor Miss Jerry, and Miss Frizzy backed her up in that same, she says
to me—‘Oh, Mrs. Wilcox, do try to get that nice young man from Sunbury,
that married poor Kitty Fairthorn. He has more power over mother than
any one on earth. She is afraid of him, that’s the truth, though she’d
box my ears if she heard me say so. ‘There might be time enough,’ she
says, ‘if you’d set off directly, and I’ll pay all expenses.’ Well,
I thought it must come from Heaven that I should be thinking of the
uncle, and she of the nephew; and so come, both gents, I beg of you;
there’ll be murder between them, if you don’t; for the police can’t
interfere, you know.”

“Kit, let us go,” said my Uncle Corny, as some new idea struck him; “we
cannot interfere of course, but we can see the end of it.”

Kitty was very much against my going, and I would not have left her,
unless Miss Parslow had promised to stay with her, until our return,
although it would compel her to send back the fly, and beg a bed for
the night from her old friend Sally.

My uncle took a big stick, and so did I; and in a quarter of an hour
we started in the tax-cart, with Mrs. Wilcox on the cushion. I was
the driver, and my uncle sat behind, for there was no room for three
of us, all rather broad, in front. And certainly I was the calmest of
the three, for the good lady was in a dreadful fright and fret; and my
uncle sat heavily, with his chin upon his stick, taking no notice of
the roads or streets, but dwelling on the distance of bygone sorrow.
The wrong he had suffered was greater than mine in one way, and less
in another; greater, because it was incurable; lighter, because le