Title: The Old Goat
Author: Fontenay, Charles L.
Language: English
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                             THE OLD GOAT

                        BY CHARLES L. FONTENAY

                 _It's been said that the soul is the
                  form that makes the body--which may
                 just_ possibly _explain what happened
                 on that fatal day at Ivy College...._

           [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
             Worlds of If Science Fiction, February 1957.
         Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
         the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]


Dr. Angstrom was known to his students and many of his colleagues on
the faculty as "The Old Goat." Very appropriate, that name. He had the
disposition of a goat with dyspepsia, he had the cold blue eyes of a
goat, he had the waggling whiskers of a goat. Perhaps it's in memory of
Dr. Angstrom that Ivy College has a goat for its mascot now.

Dr. Angstrom was even more goatish than usual that day last summer when
half a dozen top scientists in the field gathered to see his preview
experiment on matter transmission of a live animal. He had been working
hard for weeks on the transmitter and keeping up classes at the same
time, which did not improve his disposition. Besides, he had a real
goat for an experimental animal, and goats are notoriously hard on the
nervous system.

This particular animal, at the moment the scientists entered, was
straining at his rope, trying to get a mouthful of a tablecloth which
graced a nearby table full of jars and retorts. Failing this, the goat
exhibited that typical lack of discrimination in matters edible and
began to chew on his rope.

I felt a little out of place among all these giant brains. My reason
for being there was that I had been serving, during my college career,
as sort of a factotum and fetch-and-carry man for Dr. Angstrom, and
I was to take notes for him. I had acquired considerable affection
for The Old Goat. Maybe that's one reason I hate to see his great
scientific work kept under wraps because people still insist it's
dangerous.

"I have proved to my own satisfaction that the matter transmitter
works," Dr. Angstrom told the assembled scientists. "I have made a
number of transmissions of inanimate matter. In theory, it should work
just as well for animate objects and I have invited you to be present
at the first test of this theory.

"I need not go into detail with you about the basic theory of matter
transmission. The transmitter itself picks up the atomic and
electronic 'image' of the object inside it, much as a television
scanner picks up a scene, except that it is done in three dimensions
instead of two. This is made possible by the four-dimensional element
which is the heart of the apparatus and was made available to us
through recent intra-atomic research.

"The receiver picks up the image as a television receiver does, except
again in three dimensions. The matter is not duplicated because the
transmitter strips down the object within it as it transmits.

"Now the question that has been raised by some scientists about the
transmission of animate objects is whether the 'soul' or 'life force'
can be transmitted. I consider this question ridiculous, and will prove
it so. It is my contention that such 'life force' is not a thing apart
from the physical shell."

The matter transmitter was a large closed cylinder on one side of the
room. The receiver was a similar cylinder on the other. Both were
raised slightly from the floor.

As sort of _hors d'oeuvre_, Dr. Angstrom transmitted a large chunk of
lead across the room, then a glass jar. In each case, the object was
placed in the transmitter and a moment later removed from the receiver
across the room. There was no possible way for it to have been moved
across the intervening space except by broadcast transmission.

"As you see," said Dr. Angstrom, "I have eliminated the necessity for
a switch by building the switch into the door of the transmitter. As
soon as the door is closed, transmission occurs. Now we shall send our
animate object."

He untied the goat and, with some difficulty, hauled the animal by its
collar to the transmitter. There the goat balked and Dr. Angstrom,
having got its head through the door, got behind it and shoved
heartily, hanging onto the edge of the door so he could shut it quickly
when the goat was inside.

As goats will, the goat suddenly changed its mind and leaped into the
transmitter. Caught off balance, Dr. Angstrom fell in after it--and the
door, given a last frantic jerk, slammed on them both.

There were gasps of horror and alarm from the scientists, but I held
up my hand to calm them.

"There's no danger, gentlemen," I said. "It's just as well this way. I
happen to know that Dr. Angstrom's next step, after proving to you with
the goat that animate objects could be transmitted, was to prove that
human beings also could be transmitted. He planned to be his own first
subject."

With serene confidence, I went to the receiver and threw open the door.
Just as I had anticipated, the goat leaped out, unharmed, followed by
Dr. Angstrom.

"I told you animate objects could be transmitted successfully," said
the goat triumphantly.

"Baa!" said Dr. Angstrom, and began eating the tablecloth.





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